Forbidden Fruit
by Mina Lisly
Summary: In a world where men of trust are hard to find, and where one could kill another just to make a statement, Raymond places his trust with Christian Grey. The Mafia Lord considers Christian as his right hand and trusts him so much that he does not hesitate on putting the care of his beloved daughter in the blond's hands. But should he? {OOC/AH/AU} Romance/Drama/Angst - No BDSM
1. Prologue

**My dear little broccolis💚💚💚**

**💚 So, this is me doing a favour to someone who PMed me and asked to upload this story with the FSOG names. The original name of this fic is The Boss's Daughter and is published under the Mortal Instruments franchise. If you're one of my old readers, well, you already know this story, so only read it if you want to read it with other characters in mind; if you're a new reader, well hang on and let's see how Ana and Christian work in here.**

**💚 But before you strap in, just a couple of warnings. Any person used to my FF writing knows that my stories are STRONGLY out of characters. I like to play with expectations, I like to make a usually hated character loved, I like to have characters who have flaws. There is no black and white, just grey (pun non-intended).**

**💚Also, know that this story will be with a majority of Christian's PoV, and that, no matter how weird or filler a chapter is, it is here on purpose. I love placing hints and foreshadowings chapter in advance, and though they are hard to find at first, they become obvious at the second reading, or when you're used to my writing.**

**💚 Also, also, this is a fair WARNING, as the summary says, this story sets place in the mafia world, meaning that some dark themes will be touched upon. I usually put a warning at the beginning of the strong chapters, but the story is rated M for a reason, and it's not just because of the lemon. Those themes are needed for the integrity of the story and can't be skipped. So if you think you won't be able to read it, I understand and implore you to turn around now before you get invested in this tale. Otherwise, welcome on board.**

**💚 And finally, I LOVE cliffhangers. But since this is just a rewrite, lucky you won't have to wait long between chapters (which will be much longer than the Prologue, don't worry).**

**💚Anyway, all I have to say is enjoy the ride, and don't forget to let me know what you think at the end of this prologue.**

**Love, Mina💚💚💚**

**.**

**Prologue: (0,4K)**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian was nervous, his last request ringing back through the small static from the connection. Raymond Steele could be a very angry man, although comparing that to his calming tone made him seem professional and not at all terrifying. Almost letting Christian forget that his boss was a crime lord. Not just a crime lord, _the_ crime lord. Head of Idris, an exclusive elite of very capable men who led the mafia around the world.

"I suppose it's a small request. I will be at the hotel by seven and we can continue this conversation." Christian was actually surprised to hear that Raymond would be there that early in the morning since he was at the moment several hours drive away from New York.

Heaving a sigh of relief as the phone line went dead, he leaned further into the bathroom sink. He had locked himself in there to make his phone call, and even though it was finished he couldn't bring himself to come out. Turning the tap, Christian submerged his hands and hissed as the icy water touched his face. He had tried to complete his mission, but it was becoming more difficult than he had bargained for. The dark copper-haired man hoped that Raymond could replace him before he did something stupid.

Christian wasn't a bad man, he didn't enjoy torturing children nor did he rob banks during his lunch break, but he was not a good man either. Ten years ago, on his eighteenth birthday, Raymond Steele had saved him from a life of petty crime, offering him a real position in his underground circle. Christian thought back to how eager he had been, practically vibrating with the excitement to be a part of something bigger, to belong.

And over the years, Raymond had shown Christian that he was trusted and accepted, both something Christian wasn't used to feeling. Raymond's faith in Christian was absolute. The proof sat in the next room. Raymond's most precious possession, his only daughter, the apple of his eyes.

_Anastasia Rose Steele_

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**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**💚 So this is just a Prologue, which is why it is so short. This prologue is actually a flash-forward so the whole story will start a few years back, when Christian is 16, just so you can all understand the connection between the characters.**

**💚Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina 💚💚💚**


	2. Chapter 1: Raymond Steele

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So here comes the first chapter. Don't forget that we are going back in time. This chapter sets place ten years before the epilogue, and the story will go on from here.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Chapter 1****: Raymond Steele (1,9K)**

**Christian's PoV (16 years old)**

After making sure that the door was well locked behind him, Christian displayed the money that he had just embezzled on the bed, jubilation lingering in his grey eyes. This wasn't his first heist, far from it; but it definitely was the most successful he had ever had. It had been so successful, that he was estimating that four (five at most) more cons like this, and he might actually be able to stop living in crappy hotel rooms, or motels. He just needed to save the money so he could buy a nice apartment.

Carefully, he counted once again his cash, relishing as the number kept going higher and higher; and then, he separated his money in three different piles, that he hid in three different places in his crappy hotel room. It wasn't that he was expecting bad company, but years of being in the streets had taught him to always be cautious, and even more when money was on his side.

Christian had escaped the system when he was twelve, tired of being transferred from foster house to foster house and of always feeling like a burden since he was five. He never knew how he actually ended in the system in the first place, he just knew that his parents never came home one day and that the police placed him in the care of the social system. After running away from an umpteenth foster house, he lived in the streets, doing his best to stay off the radar. He struggled to live in the streets with the little money he had accumulated over the years, and one day, one day harder than the others, he decided that he was tired of struggling. He started stealing out of necessity. Because his clothes were ragged because his stomach was howling for food because his throat was aching for water.

And as times passed by, he realised that he was actually good at stealing and not getting caught. He aimed for higher. Things he didn't really need. And the more he was doing it, the better he became at stealing. Christian actually became comfortable with this way of life. Why beg, when he could take without repercussions?

Still, he never saw too big. He knew which neighbourhood to avoid, which important people not to steal from when to stay low for his own safety. It wasn't that he was scared of being caught, a part of him actually enjoyed the thrill that was coming to him in defying the law; it was that he knew better than to cross path with _Raymond Steele_.

Raymond Steele was the head of Idris, the biggest mob in the world, and that mob just happened to be based in New York where Christian lived. He had heard of what Idris did to the greedy thieves that came in its territory, or to snitches. Raymond was leading his gang with an iron fist and very little compassion, and Christian didn't want to ever cross his path. Over the years, he had learned which politicians were protected by Idris, which houses were in the good favours of Raymond Steele, which neighbourhood were under his 'jurisdiction'. And he never crossed the line. No matter how appealing the cash he could make was, Christian always stayed away from Raymond Steele's path.

This was probably why he had become such a great thief over the years. He knew all the little dealers, and all the big ones, he knew all the rumours concerning the black market, and despite his young age, he had started to make himself a name amongst cons for his skill in selling back stolen goods. Especially when those goods were rare and expensive artefacts like paintings or jewellery.

Suddenly, as he was hiding his last stack of money (keeping some on him just for good measure), Christian heard an unusual noise in the corridor. He had been staying in this motel for ten days, and from 10 pm to 6 am, there was no sound whatsoever in the entire facility. Not even the squeak of a bed. It was the main reason Christian often came back to this motel, it was easy to spot an unusual noise there. He checked the clock, seeing that it was past midnight; and without thinking further into it, he switched off the light of his room and rushed to the window, in order to escape through the fire escape.

After making sure that he had his gun on him, he climbed down the stairs, doing his best to not make a single noise; but just as he reached the ground, he saw that two men in black suits were waiting for him there, a limousine parked just behind them. The first thought that occurred to Christian wasn't that it was odd to see a limousine in this part of town, but that he never understood people wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night.

One of the men walked to the limousine and opened the door, before indicating to Christian to get in, with a nod of his head. For a moment, Christian considered ignoring the men, and go the other way; but a small part of him was curious to know who was in the limousine. Maybe it was someone who was interested in him stealing something for them. Some rich guy, in his ivory tower, thinking that he was above everything and everyone.

Showing confidence that he was far from feeling, Christian climbed in the car, hearing the door clack behind him, and facing two men that he had never seen in his life. Still, he knew the identity of at least one of them, and all the blood left his face when he realised that he might be living his last moment. _Raymond Steele_ was sitting in front of him, with a man probably a bit older than him.

None of them talked for a while, leaving Christian alone with his thoughts and his heart beating faster than it should; and finally, the other man tore his gaze away from Christian when someone knocked at the window of the limousine. He rolled down a little the tainted window, only enough for a guy to tell him: "There's no money up there. Nothing, nowhere."

Christian watched the guy glance in his direction as he rolled up the window before Raymond told him: "Check him."

The guy leaned and checked his pockets, retrieving the little money that Christian had stashed there, and he used the opportunity to take away Christian's gun as well. He gave it to Raymond who examined it before he said,

"Unregistered gun. Money that disappears into thin air. Difficult to track. Instincts to runaway at the right time. You might actually be an asset if you weren't stealing from me."

"I didn't steal from you. I stole from a guy who had a poor security system and sold to another guy who had a lot of money to dispose of. You were never in the equation," Christian boldly replied. He figured that if those were his last moments, he might as well speak his mind.

"I come in the equation when you steal from a Wilks. Everyone knows better than to steal from anyone in my family, but it seems that you didn't get the memo."

"Last time I checked, your name is _Steele_, not _Wilks_."

"Last time I checked, every little thief in the streets knows that my wife's maiden name was Wilks."

Christian found himself at a loss of words, wondering how something so big and important about Raymond Steele could have slipped by him like that. Had he known that he was stealing Raymond Steele's in-laws, he would have stayed clear from the house from miles away. After all, everyone knew how mobsters were when it came to their family. Still, he didn't let his shock show,

"Still, the security system was crap. If it had been better, I never would have been able to steal anything."

"Anything? Did you steal something else than the Faberge Egg?" The other man intervened, making Christian smirk at him ad he retorted with sass:

"I don't know, you tell me."

"Who do you think you are, you little piece of s—"

"Eric!" Raymond cut the man off, his dark eyes still on Christian while the other man -Eric- was fuming next to him. Christian could actually swear that he saw the ghost of an amused smile of Raymond Steele's lips for a brief moment.

"The kid is right. The security system is faulty. If someone can get in and steal, someone can get in and kill. Shall I remind you that my daughter goes to that house twice a month?! Get rid of Smith and put someone better in this house."

"Smith is the best," Eric argued, earning a dark and threatening glare from Steele.

"Obviously not, or we wouldn't be here at this moment! Get rid of that incompetent and put Rodriguez on the house."

"But —"

Eric stopped arguing when Raymond turned his entire body to look at him, but all Christian could think about was a way to escape the limousine without being noticed. Which was impossible. Until Raymond Steele turned his head to him and told him,

"I don't care about the money, you can keep it. But I want the name of the buyer. And I want the necklace back. It holds a special place in this family."

"You can have the money and the necklace. As well as the pocket watch. I won't give you the name of the buyer," Christian explained. He was just starting to make himself a clientele, he couldn't blow that over.

"I want the egg back. I need the name. You can tell me, or I can get it out of you."

"I'll get you back your egg. You won't have the name, even if you torture me."

Raymond looked at Christian from head to toe, evaluating him, before he conceded: "The day after tomorrow, I will come back to this motel room. You have two choices: either you have my egg, either you will be dead."

"You'll have your egg," Christian confidently said, because he was sure that he could steal it back. After all, it was what he was good at. Moreover, he knew that now that Raymond knew his face, there was no point in trying to run away. No matter where, and which country, he would find him and kill him.

Raymond picked up the gun that Eric had taken from Christian, and gave it back to the young boy as he told him, "And to make it more interesting, if you manage to get me the egg by tomorrow, there is a place amongst my men that had just been vacated."

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**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚** Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed **💚

**.**

💚** So here was the first chapter, hope that you liked it very much. I liked writing it, personally. I know, we didn't see Ana in this chapter, and it's normal. We will have to wait a little to see her. For now, we just have Christian and his way of life.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** What did you think of the characters introduced here? Raymond, Christian, and Eric? As I said, the characters are all very OTP.**

💚** So, I want you to pay attention to the little tiny mention we have of Ana, and me being a big old meanie, I am asking you why do you think I want you to pay attention to this particular mention. Take Raymond's sentence as a whole!**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Guest: **_So, I do appreciate that you pointed out my errors, but just to let you know, I am not a natural English speaker, and I do trust Linguee when it tells me what a transaction is. So, I guess you should blame me for not checking, but also Lingue for obviously giving me false pieces of information. Anyway, hope you'll still give a chance to this story._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	3. Chapter 2: The Price Of Loyalty

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 2****: The Price Of Loyalty (2,6K)**

**Christian's PoV (18 years old)**

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It had been two years since Christian started working for Raymond Steele, and he could honestly say that those have been the two best years of his life. He never thought he would say that one day, but he actually prospered in this life of well-organised crime. He was not going to lie to anyone and say that he didn't like this idea of constantly defying the law, sometimes right before some Officials' noses; but what he _loved_ the most about working for Raymond Steele, was the fact that finally, he belonged somewhere. He _belonged_.

It was more than the fact that if one day he were to mysteriously disappear, he would be somehow missed by someone; but more the fact that suddenly he felt useful. He wasn't stupid enough into deluding himself into thinking that he was of some big importance for Raymond Steele, after all, he was just a common thief, but he still knew that his skills were appreciated amongst the people he was now sharing his life with.

He actually developed a few other skills, some that he shared with his companions (like his accuracy when it came to shooting), others that he kept for himself (like his sense of observation duplicating). But what he liked the most about having started to work for Raymond Steele, was the comfort of life he had. After finding out that he was living from crappy motel room to crappy motel room, Raymond had Christian know of an apartment in the centre of New York, that Christian was buying him back little by little. And with the money that he was making, two-three more years and the flat would be fully his. He also didn't need anymore to steal to survive. He actually _lived_, and he actually lived pretty well. From an outsider, it could even seem that Christian had fallen into the ranks of those people with a 9-to-5 job and a perfect life to go with it.

It was from living in his penthouse that Christian formed his first friendship with one of Raymond's men. Jose Rodriguez. Jose was six years older than him, but still a great company. He was often in Christian's building (once every few weeks) because he was in charge with Raymond's daughter security when she was visiting a friend of hers who was living in that same building. Usually, Jose would drop the young girl at her friend's so they could have their time together, and stay with Christian for the time being, slowly forming with him a friendship.

Christian also found a friend at the gym, Ryan Johnson, with whom he trained from anything physical to anything weapon-related. And though Ryan was slightly closer to him in age, and he had good times with him, his friendship with Jose still felt deeper to Christian than the one he had with Ryan. Probably because they would talk more about meaningful stuff with Jose than with Ryan.

Still, when it came to having a wingman, Christian always went out with Ryan. And it never failed to get him to go home accompanied. This was also something that he had benefiting from living a life comfort thanks to Raymond Steele, it was that he had discovered his sex-appeal, and the attraction the other sex had for him. He never lingered on that before because he was struggling to survive, and when he started _living_, it came to him.

And he was not going to pretend that he didn't like this aspect of his life. He actually liked it quite a lot. He liked that, with just one smile, he could get a girl to melt and follow him to his bed. But what he liked the most was the game. The little hunt before getting the price. He liked it even more when girls pretended that they weren't interested, but ultimately fell into his bed. And this was probably why he never had a relationship that lasted more than one night.

Over his two years working for the man, Christian also learnt a few things concerning Raymond Steele. It wasn't that he actually tried to pry into his boss's life, but more that people talked. It seemed that where Christian was lucky, Raymond wasn't. He apparently lost his first wife to childbirth and his second wife to a rival. And not in the romantic way where she would have left him, for some other guy, but in a way where she was torched alive by someone who didn't share views with Raymond. Suffice to say that the man did not survive his affront, though he left Raymond a second-time widower with a daughter that he wanted to protect even more after the death of her mother.

Christian had never really formally met Raymond's daughter. Very few people did. Actually, only the people who went often enough to the mansion had met her. He knew what she looked like, because she came every once in a while in his building, and he always thought that it would do him good to know what his boss's daughter looked like; but that was it. He knew that she was thirteen, a brunette with blue eyes and who, according to Jose, had quite a temper on her.

From the few times Raymond and Christian talked (and that were not business-related), Raymond never talked about his daughter to Christian, and Christian never tried to pry into Raymond's private life, even though Raymond did not shy away from asking Christian intimate questions from his parents' disappearance, to his love life. But strangely, even though Raymond was his boss and a crime lord, Christian never felt like he had to be embarrassed or hide parts of his life to the man.

In all honesty, he actually respected and admired the man that was Raymond Steele. Raymond had started from nothing, out of the gutter, just like him, and had managed to make himself a name over the years. His mob was one of the most important and influent in the world, if not _the_ one. He was more ruthless than the Brava, more structured than the Yakuza and more loyal than the Mafia.

Actually, the only flaw that Christian could spot in this new life he had since he started working for Raymond Steele, was Eric Lincoln. He couldn't tell why, but there was something about the man that made Christian never trust him. It was to the point that he wouldn't even dare turn his back to him, by fear of being backstabbed by the man. There was something false and fake about Eric, but Christian always kept his suspicions to himself because Eric was Raymond's right hand. What Eric said was almost as holy as what Raymond would say.

Still, though he didn't tell anyone about it, Christian made his little investigation after seeing Eric acting shady and meeting a middle-aged man in a motel. For six months, he shadowed Eric, realising as the months passed by that Eric was a mole. He didn't know per se what he was doing with the man he was seeing, but he knew that the guy was a Fed. He had followed him all the way to the Bureau several times.

For several weeks, Christian tried to figure out what would be the best approach in this situation. He didn't know if he should get rid of the problem, and then, tell Raymond about it, or if he should tell Raymond and let him deal with it. And after hours spent dwelling on it, Christian had decided to do a little bit of both. He followed Eric from his house to a little café the old man liked to go to before he knocked him unconscious so he could bring him to an abandoned warehouse, where he had texted Raymond to join him.

He tied Eric up to a chair, waiting for him to wake, and for Raymond to join them; but it was Eric who acted first. He slowly emerged, blinking a few times to accustom himself to the darkness of the place, and when he saw Christian, he furrowed his brows as he asked:

"What's the meaning of this?"

"What's the meaning of meeting frequently with a guy working for the Feds?" Christian retorted, sitting in front of him, his elbows resting on his spread knees.

"I have no idea what he's talking about," Eric defended himself, looking past Christian. Christian had heard Raymond entering the building, he was a thief, after all, he could decipher the faintest sounds, especially when he was doing something that could be qualified as compromising.

Christian snapped his fingers in front of Eric, regaining his attention, as he told him, "Why are you looking elsewhere than at me? You think that because I'm young, I can be fooled around, and that I will crawl to you, asking for forgiveness."

"What is this about?" Raymond asked nothing in his voice letting Christian know if he was condoning his actions or not. With his heart beating a bit too fast (especially knowing that he was doing the right thing), Christian looked straight into Eric's eyes and said,

"Do you want to man up and say it, or shall I?"

Eric looked alternative from Christian to Raymond, before he assured with panache, "He's delusional, Raymond. I actually suspect that he's on drugs. Something heavy that makes him delusional."

Raymond darkly chuckled, pulling a chair next to Christian and sitting on it as he enunciated, "Christian doesn't even drink, and you want me to believe that he's on hard drugs?"

Christian was surprised that Raymond knew this about him, especially when he actually doubted that Jose knew this little thing about him. But he didn't let this show, instead, he kept on looking at Eric, seeing with satisfaction that the man was starting to sweat.

"Honestly, Raymond. Who are you going to trust? Me? Who has had your back for decades, or that street rat that you took under your wing in a moment of weakness?"

"A moment of weakness?" Raymond asked his eyebrow dangerously up. Eric glanced in Christian's direction, before blurting,

"You never would have considered letting him even live if it hadn't been for what you did to T—"

"Don't try to lead me astray, Eric! What happened then has nothing to do with why you are tied to a chair! Now, you have two seconds to tell me why you are in that chair, or all those decades of friendship will fly through the window and I will put a bullet between your two eyes!"

In two years, this was the first time that Christian actually saw Raymond raise his voice, or even show temper in his demeanour. He had always pictured that Raymond was a calm man, that could be very patient but that shouldn't be pushed too far. And apparently, Eric had just pushed too far. Which was why Christian estimated that it was his time to intervene.

"He's been seeing a Fed for at least the past six months."

"He's lying!" Eric immediately defended himself, even though the panic was clear in his face and eyes.

For a moment, Raymond didn't say anything, looking straight into Eric's eyes, as if scanning his soul, before he lightly sighed and got up. Eric panicked even more, as he cried out,

"You can't believe him! You've known me for _years_, and you believe that kid out of the dumpsters! Come on, Ray! I was there all along for you, why would I desert you _now_?"

Slowly, Raymond walked to Eric, and put his hand on Eric's shoulder, in a comforting and reassuring way, leaning a little so he could whisper in his ear, "I forgive you, Eric. Loyalty isn't something fit for everyone."

Tears escaped from Eric's eyes as he babbled, "You have to understand, Ray. They've been on my back for months. They wanted to lock me in. They wanted to send me back to Utah so they could sentence me to the death penalty. I just tried to survive."

Raymond did not utter a word to Eric's plea, simply walking away from the man, but as he passed by Christian who didn't move from his chair, he retrieved his gun from his back and gave it to the young man.

"Get rid of him."

Christian's heartbeat skipped, clearly not prepared for this outcome, but his body acted on instinct and took the gun. For a minute he stared at the deadly weapon, before looking back at Raymond. "You find the flaw, you remove the flaw," Raymond explained, looking expectantly a Christian.

With all the difficulty in the world, Christian swallowed, getting up from his chair and aiming at Eric. But as he was doing so, it occurred to him that he had never shot a man before. He practised almost daily with Ryan, back at the stand, but it had always been at targets. And even when he was living in the streets, even though he owned a gun, he never shot anybody with it. _He never killed_. He never ended a life before.

Eric was still pleading for his life, but all Christian could hear was the blood rushing to his ears, his heart beating loudly in his ribcage, his breathing accelerating as he was realising that ... he didn't care. Eric could die from his hand, he didn't care. He would still sleep on both his ears when the night would come. And just like that, he pulled the trigger.

For a couple of seconds, the astonishing sound of the shot numbed Christian; but when Eric's chin fell on his torso, Christian felt like he was back to normal. People always made such big deals about killing or shooting, but to Christian, it felt like it was more fright than necessary.

He turned to give Raymond back his gun, which he took, before letting Christian know, "Make a statement with him. I want the FBI and the men to know what happens to moles who try to undermine me."

And on those words, he left, leaving Christian alone with a corpse and a mission.

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**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚** Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed **💚

**.**

💚 **What did you think of the new characters introduced here? Ryan and Jose? And yes, it is on purpose that Jose becomes Christian's best friend, and not Ana's.**

💚 **So, now, how do you feel about Raymond? And how do you feel about Christian and him loving his life of crime?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Guest: **_Well, now you know who Eric is … was, haha … But as I say, pay attention to the small hints and remember that those characters are VERY OOC._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	4. Chapter 3: Anastasia Steele

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 3****: Anastasia Steele (3,8K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV (22 years old)**

"_Shit_! I think I am going to stop training with you for while," Ryan said, gently massaging his jaw that Christian had just punched with force as they were training.

Christian smirked, removing the bandages that were protecting his knuckles, and admitting to himself that he had been hard on his friend with his last blow. His fingers still feeling the sting of the collision were proof enough. He actually felt that it was a miracle that he didn't dislocate Ryan's jaw, but he was not so confident concerning the state his knuckles were going to be in the next day.

Of course, he didn't let any of his worry show to Ryan, or to anyone else that was training with them at the gym. He kept his face stoic, only betrayed by the little smirk he had, like he usually had when he was knocking someone to the ground. He liked showing that he was good at his craft, and ever since Ryan had started showing him more than self-defence and disarming someone (skills that Christian had learnt on his own), and opened the copper-haired man to the world of martial arts, Christian always did his best to ... be the best at it. More often than once, Ryan beat Christian in the blink of an eye, so each time Christian could put his instructor to the ground, was a small victory to him.

It had been four years since Christian had exposed Eric to Raymond, and to the world. When Raymond told him to make a statement, Christian had decided to dispose of Eric's body on the front door of the FBI. Which had been extremely risky, especially since he had been alone with no one to have his back, but still made a statement so loud that the media covered it. Though Christian had troubles knowing if the media covered Eric's death because he disposed of his body in front of the Bureau, or because he had been poetic and spilt Eric's guts open as a warning for anyone tempted to do what Eric did to understand what would be their future. In any case, Raymond deeply appreciated what Christian did, and appreciated even more that, though an investigation had been open upon Eric's death, neither he nor Christian was ever called to the Station.

Still, ever since Eric's death, Raymond never replaced him. Christian couldn't tell if it was because Raymond had grown more suspicious of people around him, or if he still didn't want anyone to replace Eric by his side because Eric had been more than Raymond's right hand, he had also been his friend. But that didn't stop Raymond any way on including Christian more into his inner circles.

Often, Raymond would call upon Christian and ask him to come with him to business meetings, whether it was meeting an arising politician that he could easily bribe or threaten, extorting money from someone he had lent money to, or acquiring new businesses. Christian always faithfully followed Raymond, wherever he went, and always did as asked, no matter what. Whether it was getting rid of somebody, or transporting money (or drugs) from a State to another, Christian always did as asked.

And he didn't complain about the result, anyway. Raymond showed him a little more how he handled his empire. Like he encouraged Christian's choice to not drink, advising him to never take any sort of drug because there was nothing worse than being addicted to one's own product. He also taught Christian to never get attached to anyone he was working with, especially when big amounts of money were involved.

A few men at the gym actually made fun of Christian and his loyalty to Raymond. Not that it was seen as a bad thing, far from it; but more than some men insinuated that Christian felt like Raymond's surrogate son. But Christian never paid attention to that sort of gossip. Raymond gave him the possibility to belong, and it was, therefore, logical for him to be loyal to the man who gave him this opportunity.

With a little sigh, Christian got off the ring, grabbing his towel and his water bottle as he walked toward the lockers. Ryan caught up with him, wiping the sweat away from his face as he asked:

"Doing anything tonight? I feel like it would do me some good if you focused your energy on something else than my face."

Christian snickered, not against the idea of finding a partner for the night, but he still denied the offer, "The boss has been asking for me to pass by the mansion. You'll have to do without me, tonight."

Ryan grimaced, throwing his towel over the pile of dirty laundry as he explained, "The boss isn't in a good mood today. He fired Camille yesterday night, and everyone is walking on eggs shelves."

"Why would he fire Camille?" Christian asked, slightly disturbed by the news.

He actually liked Camille quite a lot. She was a young Chef that Raymond had picked out of school, and Christian could clearly tell why. She had a gift with food, and she was the reason he liked going to the mansion. In all honesty, Christian didn't like being so close to Raymond's personal life but still went to the mansion when summoned. Camille always made him a little something special in the kitchen, and Christian never complained about it. Sure Camille was flirty, and always batted her eyes at him when he came, but Christian always put that on the fact that she was young and pretty. She wasn't that much younger than him, but she didn't come from the streets, so she didn't have to grow before her age.

"Do you _really _have to ask anymore?" Ryan said with a blasé tone, before walking to a shower cabin and adding, "Raymond should really stop firing people like that. I thought I was out of a job too when I went to train her. I mean, I kind of _have_ to have my hands on her _all the time_! He stayed the whole lesson today when usually he leaves us alone."

Christian went to his own cabin, switching on the cold water as he thought of Camille. She had never made a secret that she was bisexual and that she was fun-loving. But going after the boss's daughter was a bold move. Though, Christian couldn't put the blame wholly on Camille. Over the past couple of months, Raymond had fired five men just for _looking_ at his little girl. A little girl who wasn't such a little girl anymore. Ryan (who was her martial arts instructor) and Jose were both very clear on that: Anastasia Steele had grown into a very well curved young woman, despite the fact that she was still only seventeen.

"People should probably stop eying a _seventeen_ years old girl, who nonetheless _happens_ to be the boss's daughter, you know," Christian bounced, speaking a bit louder due to the fact that they were both under their shower.

"_Really_, Christian? We have eyes, dude. Not everyone only sees Raymond Steele, as you do. She's hot, she's hot. There I said it. It's only human to look and assess beauty. Looking at her is exactly the same as looking at some fine ass girl in the streets. Looking doesn't mean you'll do something, it just means that you appreciate the beauty displayed in front of you."

"Whatever, Ryan," Christian dismissed, not eager to continue a conversation that was so close to Raymond's personal life. The less he mingled with any privacy with his boss, the better he felt.

After taking a rather short and cold shower, Christian left the gym complex and drove to the mansion where Raymond lived. It was a very beautiful and grandiose house that probably cost millions given the fact that it was in a nice part of Manhattan. Christian never understood why Raymond had spent so much on such a big estate when only he and his daughter lived there. Sure he had people working for him such as cooks and housekeepers, but to Christian, Raymond could have lived just as well in a nice penthouse. But he always figured that Raymond probably had dreams of having a bigger family, before his wife was taken away from him.

Raymond never remarried, and Christian actually doubted that he was seeing any woman, to entertain him during the cold nights. He actually never asked his boss why he never remarried, when Carla Wilks was his second wife, to begin with.

As he drove through the gates, Christian's thoughts wandered to how Raymond had asked him more and more to come to his mansion over the past few years. Going to the mansion wasn't a privilege given to a lot of men working for Raymond. Actually, very few men knew were the Steeles actually lived. Everyone one knew they were living in Manhattan, but that was about it. Still, Raymond seemed to trust Christian enough to summon him to his house whenever he needed him, and no matter the time.

As he walked through the mansion, his eyes caught a glimpse of dark hair coming out of the outdoor pool. And for a moment, he foot hang in the air, instead of stepping up the staircase and going to his boss's office as asked.

This was the first time that he was seeing Anastasia Steele in a bikini, and he was now understanding what Ryan was talking about. _She was hot_! He actually couldn't fathom how he did not realise this before. Maybe it was because he never actually looked at her before since he mostly always met her with her father around. But seeing her there, all alone, with very little to cover, Christian had to admit that she was worthy of a teenage boy wet dream. She wasn't outrageously curvy, but she wasn't skinny either. She had just enough curves just where needed, and her body was all toned (though knowing that she trained every morning with Ryan, it was understandable).

Christian's staring only lasted for a second, and he was torn out of his reverie by the young girl pulling a long see-through cardigan before she strode inside of the mansion and passed by him, her head high. Still, for the brief second her blue eyes landed on him, Christian caught the way she clearly checked him out. He was used to the look and the feeling, he was getting it from all the women who wanted to sleep with him.

But he never let his mind wander toward that dangerous path, and just refocused his brain on why he was there in the first place. He shook his head as if to get rid of anything that had just happened and walked to his boss's office, only to realise that he was following the young brunette. He did his best to not look at her ass showing through the now wet fabric and screaming to be grabbed and put all his attention on the shade of chestnut her hair was. It was a luscious and voluminous, with several strands a shade lighter than the rest of her hair.

As the two of them took the last turn leading to Raymond's office, Christian understood that the young girl had set her mind on seeing her father, and a wild thought occurred to him. What if she had caught him checking her out, and was here to rat him to her Dad? What if Raymond decided to fire him for looking at his daughter the wrong way? Especially since Christian knew very well that getting fired by Raymond for this particular reason meant that he would never make it in this country and that he would ultimately end up at the hospital. Absentmindedly, Christian wondered if Raymond had applied the same rules to Camille, despite the fact that she was a girl.

"What are you doing here, Ana?" Raymond asked with his brows furrowed when his daughter opened the door of his office. Still, though all his attention was on his daughter, Raymond silently signalled Christian to enter the office as well. Christian did so, closing the door behind him, and staying in position, waiting for the moment between the Steeles to be over.

Anastasia didn't seem to mind or notice Christian's presence as she started rambling: "You know, I've been thinking a lot about this whole Italy business. And ... well, I'm _seventeen_. I can stay here on my own. I don't have to follow you around everywhere anymore. It would actually be better for the both of us if you didn't have to —"

"You're coming, Ana. And that's it. And aren't you the one who's been nagging me that summer vacations are made to travel?"

"Yeah ... But ... Can't I go somewhere else with Jose? London? Barcelona? Ibiza?"

Raymond rose an eyebrow to his daughter, an amused smile spreading on his lips, and though Christian didn't show any emotions, he shared Raymond's amusement. His teenage daughter wanted to go to the European cities most known for their parties, especially during summertime. Raymond slightly shook his head, looking down to some papers in front of him as he told his daughter,

"Italy, it is. There are no arguments in that."

"But what am I going to do there?! I always end up stuck in the hotel, no matter where we go, and I'm sorry to tell you, it's getting boring, no matter how luxurious the hotel is."

Raymond didn't even spare a glance up to show sympathy to his daughter as he sternly repeated himself, "No arguments."

Anastasia did that noise so peculiar to teenagers, before she stomped out of the room, not without glancing at Christian who didn't move a single muscle since he had entered the room. Once the door was slammed behind her, Raymond heaved and rested his head on the back of his chair, closing his eyes in a moment of what seemed like vulnerability to Christian. For a moment, neither of them said a word, before Raymond regained his composure and told Christian,

"The hassle of having children. Not that you care at the moment."

Christian didn't say a word, not sure of what he could say, because he didn't feel like he could be opinionated on the matter since he didn't have children himself. He was about to ask why Raymond had summoned him when his boss made himself more comfortable in his chair as he said,

"I want you to come with me to Italy."

Raymond's brown eyes were steady on Christian, analysing his every breath, his every reaction, but all Christian could find to retort was: "Me? I don't speak Italian. There are others who are more qualified —"

"I know there are better-qualified people to go to Italy. But I want _you_ to come with me. I want us to pay a visit to Eduardo, and this is my opportunity to show you how to handle foreign business. It's always good to know those things."

Raymond had returned his attention to his papers, but Christian didn't need time to think. This was an indirect order, and he was a soldier. So he simply asked, "When are we leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

For the duration of their trip, Christian didn't see, nor even heard Anastasia speak. she was pissed to have been brought to this business trip she wanted nothing to do with, and she was clear on letting it known to everybody. During the flight to Roma, she even went as far as to ask to be placed the furthest from her father (though them being in first class didn't help a lot her case). It was at that moment that Raymond explained to Christian that his daughter's hire had to do with more than just him demanding that she came with him to Italy.

"I have been introduced to a boyfriend three days ago. Suffice to say that the boyfriend didn't last," He said, making Christian look at the brunette a few seats from them. That explained why she was acting ... like such an angsty teenager.

"You scared the boy away?"

"Of course, I did! She is still a child, and boys have no business being around her!" Raymond exclaimed, and this was something that Christian had noticed a lot over the years. Raymond always had a cool and calm demeanour, as long as his family (in his case his daughter) was not involved. In a way, Christian felt for anyone who would ever want to pursue Anastasia Steele, for he knew that no one would ever be good enough for her in the eyes of her father.

"With all due respect, your daughter is seventeen. She's a teenager, and she's bound to form relationships with people that will be more than friendly. You shouldn't let the natural way of life come between you two," Christian wisely said, though a part of him wondered if Raymond would throw him off the plane mid-air for not agreeing with him on the spot. Which was probably why he added, "If you want to scare a boy away, don't do it openly, and certainly not in front of her. You should deal with him, the same way you deal with your other businesses."

As Christian was advising Raymond to have a more subtle and detached approach toward Anastasia's suitors, the young girl got up so she could use the restroom. Raymond didn't add anything, but Christian knew that he was now considering handling his daughter's future boyfriends the same way he handled people in his way concerning the business. It wasn't much that he would threaten anyone, but more that he would let them know that it would be in their best interest to steer clear from the young girl; and just like he did already, he would make sure that his name would never be mentioned.

After that little aparté, Raymond never mentioned his daughter again to Christian, except for the fact that he let the young man know that if Jose didn't come with them so the young brunette could visit the city when they were attending their business, it was because Jose suffered from claustrophobia, and wouldn't bare the plane ride. This surprised Christian, because over the years, Jose and he became close enough to be called best friends, and Jose never told him anything about his phobia. Then again, Raymond had told Christian to keep quiet about it, and Christian figured Jose didn't want other men finding out and thinking less of him.

The business that Raymond had to attend to only took a couple of days to handle. Apparently, Eduardo, the faulty party, was trying to overstep Raymond by building a casino near the one Raymond already had in Rome. Raymond tried to be civilised about it at first, and talk things out with the man, but it became obvious that Eduardo wasn't going to back off, as he should, Raymond left him with a simple choice: his life, or the casino. Choice that was rapidly made by Eduardo.

And so for the last day of their trip to Italy, Raymond granted his daughter a day of being complete tourists. She jumped on the occasion and dragged her father and Christian all over the city. She made them go to the Pantheon, the Colosseum, the Trevi Fountain, the Roman Forum, and last but not least, la Piazza Navona. She had wanted to visit the Vatican as well, but Raymond firmly opposed to the idea, using the pretext that they didn't have enough time to do so.

Christian stayed dutifully behind Raymond and his daughter, not intervening into their relationship, but still seeing that no matter how pissed she was at her father, Anastasia didn't stay mad for long. Christian could actually say without the shadow of a doubt that the relationship father and daughter had was something strong and deep. They both loved one another, that was obvious.

It was during dinner around a pizza that Christian decided that he should stay away from the young girl. This thought had been hanging in a corner of his mind ever since the pool incident, but it was during this particular dinner that Christian knew that it had to become a reality.

"Thank you for today, Dad. I really appreciate it," Anastasia said, all smiles for her father who gave her back her smile. A smile that quickly faded away when she added, "Maybe you should let me do my next trip all on my own, next time. Promise I won't get lost."

"That's not happening," Raymond sternly said, looking around to hail a waiter for the bill.

And it was at this precise moment that Christian knew he should keep as much distance between him and Anastasia Steele. Just as her father was looking away, she spared Christian a glance, and this particular look was the reason why Christian had to put his distance with her. This look would have been a turn-on for him from any other woman. Especially women as good looking as her.

And if she had been any other woman, Christian would have gladly taken her to his bed to peel her off of her clothes and make her scream his name all night long. But she wasn't. He needed to stay away from her. She wasn't any other woman. She was a seventeen years old girl. She was someone he saw regularly in the course of a year. And most importantly, she was his boss's daughter. She was the forbidden fruit.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚** Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed **💚

**.**

💚** So finally, we met Ana. Not so much as meeting her, but she is finally a talking character in this story. And apparently, she likes Christian just fine. By the way, I want you to remember that Ana is 17 so far (not really important but still), and that she lived a life where she never needed for anything. I am not saying that she is a spoiled brat, I am just saying that her norm isn't the norm we (normal people who aren't born into super-wealthy families) have. Just keep that in mind.**

💚** Also, I don't want you to take Ryan as a bad guy because he stated that Ana was hot. He is a guy, and Ana is very attractive in this story. Like Christian said, teenage boy wet dream hot. Ryan just speaks his mind, not really caring about propriety. Just so you know.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What did you think of the relationship growing between Christian and Raymond?**

💚**So, now, how do you feel about Christian's decision to stay away from Ana?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Guest1: **_Well, I have to say that I love that you are asking those exact questions! Because those are questions that will DEFINITELY come back later. And that's why I won't answer them now, I don't want to spoil it for you. But now that .. I like going against what you think the story will go._

**Guest2****: **_Hey, the Lincoln storyline isn't as closed as one could think ... Just keep an eye out for the few hints that will be dropped here and there... As for Mia and Elliott, they will definitely be in the story, but they won't be related to Christian and will be very OOC from the OG_

**Guest3****: **_So this story was uploaded under a different fandom, but someone asked me to reupload it under the FSOG fandom, and because I'm bad at saying no, here we are. So you probably read The Boss's Daughter and that's why you are confused._

**Guest4&5****: **_Hihi Well, here I updated, hope you'll like it 😉_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	5. Chapter 4: Playing With Fire

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to contain dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 4****: Playing With Fire (6,3K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV (25 years old)**

Christian was boxing alone in the training room, the sun having set a long time ago, but his anger still there like it had been for the past four hours. Though he wasn't sure if the feeling raging inside of him was anger or frustrated annoyance; which was why, even after everyone had left the building, Christian stayed, being angry against a bag of beans, instead of against someone, and doing his best to clear his mind.

Raymond had summoned him in his mansion earlier in the afternoon to assign him to his next mission, and no matter how much he liked that Raymond was confident enough to let Christian do missions on his own more and more, Christian would have gladly taken any other mission than the one that had just been imposed on him.

"If you hit that bag any harder, you will have to pick up the beans you'll spill," Jose's voice suddenly said behind Christian, making Christian simply turn a little his head to acknowledge the presence of his best friend.

Jose elegantly sat on the floor, just below the window, resting his head against the frame as he looked at the copper-haired man with his brows slightly furrowed. Christian ignored the Hispanic man and resumed his previous occupation of punching the bag until he would feel his fingers numb. For five minutes, none of the two men said a thing, the only noise in the room being the huffs coming from Christian, and the thunks his knuckles made every time they met the bag.

"So, what are you so worked up about? Ryan said that you almost destroyed him, _once again_," Jose casually said, before he added with nonchalance: "And Luke says that you haven't left the gym since you got here."

Christian rolled his eyes, not caring the least in the world that he was the centre of gossips amongst his brothers in arms. He knew that Ryan did not appreciate having to endure his bad mood and hard blows; and since Luke was the head of security, Christian was not surprised that he knew where he was. After all, Luke was the only who could still sneak up on him. He was always silent as a cat and could disappear in the shadow without a problem, even though now he's job was more about telesurveillance than actually shadowing of people.

"I just want to stay in shape. Is that a crime, now?" Christian snapped at his best friend, not even sparing a glance in his direction.

"Sure," Jose replied, putting in his tone as much disbelief as he could, and though it annoyed Christian, he still did not give reason to his friend, stubbornly hitting the boxing bag as sweat was rolling from his face and arms.

For a moment, none of them said a thing, until Christian finally let out between two blows: "Raymond is sending me to Japan."

"And that's bad because ..." Jose trailed, clearly not following Christian's trail of thoughts. Christian finally stopped boxing, only to let himself slump next to his friend as he said between gritted teeth, removing the bandages from his palms,

"Because I am not going there on a mission. I am going there as a glorified babysitter!"

"Oh. Well, that makes sense. Ana has been talking about Japan for a while, and Raymond was clearly not going to let his daughter go to _Japan_ alone. I mean, it's only logical."

"Yeah, well, I have better things to do than to look after kids!" Christian exclaimed, letting his head rest against the windowpane as he closed his eyes, rather annoyed that his friend was not taking his side, and was not ready to bitch and rant about this assignment he had just been given.

"Raymond doesn't seem to think so. He wouldn't send you to the other side of the globe if he needed you here," Jose argued, angering Christian more than calming him. Mostly because the fact remained,

"I am not a _baby-sitter_!"

Jose didn't seem moved by his excess of anger, whether it was the fact that Christian just shouted or the fact that he got up with temper to start pacing in front of him. mag remained calm, only upping a little his head so he could still look at Christian. With composure, he rested his arm on his lifted knee, as he told Christian,

"You're looking at it the wrong way. Raymond is sending you to a dangerous place to protect what he values the most in the world. _You, and you alone_. I mean, that never happened before. We're always at least two to look after her, and you know it."

"I could be more useful, staying here! Especially with the Mazaratis trying to —"

"And I'm sure Raymond knows it," Jose cut him off. "But here, he is trusting you to look after _his daughter_. I don't think you realise how big this is. Even I don't drive Ana around alone. There's always someone else, either Evan driving us, either Luke staying in the shadows, if not both of them. This level of trust is ... unseen. I don't think even Eric had that."

Christian stopped pacing and sat beside his friend, keeping for himself what was really bothering him. It had been three years since the pool incident, and during the course of those three years, Christian had masterfully remained far away from Anastasia. It did help that Raymond was sending him more and more on missions on his own, to deal with people the same way he had dealt with Eduardo in Italy. But Christian went further than that, he actually _avoided_Anastasia. He knew when she was at the mansion and was always doing his best to go there when she wasn't there. He knew (thanks to Jose) when she was visiting her friend in his building, and always went out with Ryan when she did. And Raymond never asked him again to go on a trip when his daughter was with him. Christian was so determined to keep the forbidden fruit at bay, that he actually always refused entertaining brunettes when he was going out with Ryan.

Still, the very few times they saw a glimpse of each other of the past three years, Christian could swear that the sexual tension between them was growing stronger and stronger. And this was why he didn't like the idea of being sent to a foreign country with a girl he wanted so much in his bed, but couldn't even _think of_ touching. He didn't know where all this sexual tension came from, given the fact that they barely exchanged more than ten words during all those years they've known each other, but it was still there, and Christian didn't like it.

But he couldn't decently tell Raymond that he wouldn't look after his daughter without giving him a good reason. Christian never refused Raymond anything, not even the most gruesome expectations coming from the older man, so it was an understatement that Raymond wouldn't understand Christian denying him that one little thing that only required Christian to look after one little girl. He couldn't tell Raymond no on this one thing, and this was what angering Christian the most. He felt trapped. He didn't want to stay two weeks alone with Anastasia, but he did not have a choice on the matter.

"Besides, you shouldn't take it as you being a babysitter, but as you going on vacations at the boss's expenses," Jose added, sure of his logic, and oblivious of what was really bothering Christian. "I mean, Ana is a really cool person to hang out with. She isn't the brat you think she is, she's actually really fun to be around."

"I am not you, Jose. I do not get all chubby and friendly with the boss's daughter," Christian gravely snapped back.

Jose rolled his eyes, replying with his favourite line when it came to Christian's character: "You're too stern for your own good. You should try loosening up a bit. Someone, your age shouldn't be so ... _stiff_."

Christian shook his head, not eager to pursue a conversation he knew he couldn't be honest about, and started walking to the locker room, with Jose short on his heels. The Hispanic man remained silent whilst Christian made his way to the shower, and only when Christian was under the water, Jose said,

"Raymond told you, didn't he?"

"What?" Christian asked, both because he wasn't sure what Jose was talking about, but also because he wasn't sure to have understood properly what Jose had said. Jose cleared his throat and explained,

"I just find it odd that you didn't even try to question the fact that Raymond didn't ask _me_ to look after Ana when I do it almost all the time."

"I just figured that you were sent on another mission. If you want to trade places, I'm all for it, Christian lied, giving his friend an opportunity to keep his secret fear for himself.

Ever since Raymond had told Christian that Jose was claustrophobic on their way to Italy, Christian had kept that information to himself, though a part of his mind did pick up on a few things that Jose would do and that made it obvious when one was paying a little attention. For instance, Jose always opened a window when he was coming to Christian's place. At first, Christian had only figured that it was because Jose liked being in a fresh aired room, but now that he knew the truth, it was obvious to him why. Like the way Jose would never close a door behind him, or the fact that he always avoided elevators as much as he could.

Still, since Jose never told him about his claustrophobia, Christian respected his wish, and never mentioned it, or the odd actions Jose was taking sometimes.

Since Jose didn't reply anything, Christian assumed that his friend had left, and so he finished his shower in silence, still internally cursing at the fact that he was about to spend two weeks with a girl he didn't want to be caught nearby. But when he stepped out of the shower, his towel wrapped around his hips, he saw that Jose hadn't left and was simply leaning against a locker, his gaze lost in space.

"You okay, man?" Christian asked, a bit concerned by this attitude coming from Jose; and the dark-haired man brusquely shook his head, coming back to the present moment with Christian. He smiled to the copper-haired man, and tapped his shoulder with a frank smile as he told him,

"Thank you for keeping it for yourself."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Christian said, sharing the same smile with him.

"Anyway, my work here is done. You stopped usefully bruising yourself, and I have someone else to see now," Jose announced with a smug smirk on the corner of his lips, walking away from the lockers and leaving Christian alone to get dressed.

As he did so, he reflected on the fact that it wasn't the first time Jose was going out at night to meet 'someone'. But the thing was, Christian never heard Jose talk about girls the way Ryan, Luke, or himself would. And it bothered Christian. Not really the fact that he highly suspected his best friend of being gay, but more the fact that his best friend didn't trust him to share with him his deepest secrets. Whether it was his fear of small and closed places or his liking into the same sex.

But then again, Christian didn't share either his attraction toward the brunette who happened to be their boss's daughter with his best friend.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

During the whole flight from New York to Tokyo, Christian and Anastasia didn't exchange a single word, mostly because Christian pretended to be sleeping, listening to music. He knew that Anastasia watched movies and slept a little, but he barely opened his eyes, giving her no opportunity to try and engage any sort of conversation with him. And though it had been easy for him to avoid the young brunette in the plane, Christian knew that the hardest part was to come. After all, it was easy to avoid someone in a plane, it was definitely harder to avoid someone that you were sent to follow and protect everywhere.

Before they took off, Raymond warned Christian that his daughter was most likely to try to get rid of him. She didn't like having 'babysitters' around her when she was twenty, and completely capable of fending for herself. Raymond also told Christian that Anastasia had always been obsessed with Japan and that she knew perfectly well how to speak fluently the language, as well as how to blend in this culturally different country. He informed Christian that, knowing his daughter, she was most likely to try to lose him whilst in Tokyo, and that was the reason why he was sending Christian and not anyone else. Raymond had bargained with his daughter not to send her with an armada of men behind her, but Raymond was well aware that his daughter would either try to lose the person he would send with her, either convince him to let her live her life. Which was why Christian came in the picture. Raymond knew that Christian wouldn't let her out of his sight and that no matter what Anastasia would say, he wouldn't let her stray him away from his mission.

As the plane started its descent toward the Japanese soil, Christian finally opened his eyes, straightening on his chair as he glanced at the brunette seating not far from him. She was sleeping, one of her earbuds having fallen off her ear whilst the movie _Casablanca_ was still playing on her screen. This was something he had never lingered on, but now he was realising that Anastasia looked nothing like her father.

Raymond was tall, buffed and dark blond with brown eyes that pierced right through one's soul. His daughter, on the other hand, was nothing like that. She was small (not to say short), fragile-looking and her hair were of a lovely shade of chestnut. Even her skin wasn't of the same colouring as her father's. She was so pale that one could see her blue veins every now and then on her skin. The only thing that Christian could say that the Steeles had in common was their eyes. Sure, Anastasia's eyes were bright blue, but she had the same way to look at people as her father.

And it was actually Anastasia's blue eyes that haunted Christian the most when it came to the petite brunette. Sure he happened to fantasise over her luscious and curved body, about losing his hands in her luxurious hair, about imprisoning her pink lips in his; but her eyes were always in his fantasies, and he would love nothing more than to see her blue sapphires light up with ecstasy if he were to ever give her an orgasm.

But he knew that this was all dreams because first and foremost, she was Raymond Steele's daughter.

After they landed, the two of them quickly retrieved their luggage and got in a cab in direction of their hotel. During the ride, Anastasia Skyped her father to let him know that she landed okay; and Christian turned his head to look at the view from the window, in order to give Raymond and his daughter as much privacy as he could. It was only when they reached the hotel lobby that Anastasia finally decided to speak to Christian (not that he minded the silence that was between them before).

"So, I know that you're supposed to follow me everywhere during the next couple of weeks, but let's face it, none of us wants that. So ... maybe you could go around and do whatever you want, and I do the same on my part."

Christian refrained a smirk and pretended to think about it, allowing the young brunette a gleam of hope that he crushed as he sternly told her, "You do whatever you want, but know that if you think you can lose me, you'll only find me lurking in your shadows. So lets both be mature about this one, and avoid me having to look like a creep."

Anastasia grunted her discontentment and strode to the elevator, following their valet who showed them to their rooms, and Christian ensued, repressing himself from completely laughing at her and her naivety. He couldn't believe that she earnestly thought that he would let her wander in a country where the mob was so present, _especially_ when he had been sent by her father -his boss- to look after her in the first place.

When he was in his room, the one just next to Anastasia's, the first thing Christian did was to check if his gun was still in his suitcase. Raymond had told him that he would make sure that he would be armed in Japan, but Christian was still suspicious of the airport security. Especially since he was in a country where gun control was way more intense and looked after than in the US. But he realised that he had been worrying for nothing and that the gun was still in place, amongst his clothes.

He secured it in his pants, and wandered around his room, just to get acquainted with his surroundings. Then, he went to Anastasia's room to do the same, and check that nothing was out of the ordinary, which made the young brunette roll her eyes to the Heavens before he left to go back to his room and call his boss.

Raymond answered after the first ring, though he did not seem worried to receive a phone call from Christian, "I was wondering when you were going to call me."

"I just wanted to be in place first."

"Did she already try to get rid of you?" The older man asked, amusement clear in his voice, and Christian allowed himself to chuckle as he informed Raymond:

"She didn't like my response, but I think she got the message loud and clear that she wouldn't be able to get rid of me."

The two men laughed a little at the expense of the oblivious young girl; and then, Christian went on to more important business than the errands of a twenty years old girl, "I was thinking about that new FBI agent that has been to Idris, you should have Luke have a background check on him. To see if we can use his past against him if it ever comes to that. And maybe get Ryan to lose him a bit and make him track dead-ends."

For years, Idris, the mob Raymond had created from scratch, had been the centre of interest of the FBI, and even the CIA. But Raymond had always played his cards well and managed to get moles to keep him in the loop. Strangely enough, people working for the government were harder to bribe than the ones working for the taxpayer. Raymond almost had the entire police of New York in his pocket, but he couldn't say the same with the FBI and the CIA.

"That is something to consider. But so far I'm not that worried. He's been assigned to a case that no one has ever closed, nor ever will. I will let you sleep a little. It is late on your side of the globe, and if Ana sees that you're tired, she'll use the opportunity to sneak out on you tomorrow. I'll call you tomorrow around the same time."

Christian said his goodbyes, checking on the time and realising that it was almost two in the morning. With a heave, he let himself fall into the bed, not even taking the time to change out of his travelling clothes, or get under the covers. The only thing he did was to take the gun out of his back and put it under his pillow, within his reach.

He barely slept for four hours that night, but the cold shower he took made him alert in minutes, and he was at Anastasia's door by half-past six, sure that she would try to sneak out on him. And he realised he was right when he saw her come out of her bedroom an hour later, stepping on her tiptoes, and hiccuping with surprise when she saw him waiting for her by her door.

"_Gee_! Don't you ever sleep?!"

Christian smirked but didn't reply anything. She glared at him, before putting her head high and announcing, "I feel like shopping and being the most touristic possible today. So we're staying here and getting to know Shibuya first hand."

Christian silently followed her, already cursing at the fact that he was stuck on a shopping day, right from the beginning. No matter what Jose had told him, he couldn't see the bright side of that. There was nothing fun or good that could come out of shopping. Especially with a girl. _Especially _with a girl who had access to an unlimited credit card.

As they stepped out of the hotel, the sun already up in the sky, Christian couldn't help but check her out, and he had to admit, it looked like she was consistent with her plans. She was dressed to shop and didn't let his presence startle her out of her program. She was wearing a blue floating skirt that went all the way to her knees, with a plain white shirt who had the first two buttons up undone. Her shoes were flat and echoing the same colour as her brown belt and bag. He wondered if she had put sunscreen on the skin that was seeing the sun, and his mind briefly wandered to him helping her put on the said sunscreen.

Still, he quickly brushed away the distracting thought, staying by her side. Though he let a little distance between them to give her the illusion that she wasn't 'babysat' (still staying close enough to intervene in case it was needed).

All-day long, Anastasia made them go all over the Shibuya area, marvelling at every corner and clearly loving discovering the country. Christian realised that Raymond hadn't been exaggerating when he said that his daughter was fully prepared for this trip. For what he could tell, her Japanese was perfect, and she clearly knew the customs of the country. And this annoyed Christian even more to having been put on that mission, because now, he was feeling completely useless.

Even though they spent the day together, walking from place to place and going from shop to shop, Christian and Anastasia didn't exchange a lot of words. The only few times they talked was when Anastasia asked if Christian was hungry, or when she finally told him that she was getting tired and that she wanted to go back to the hotel. To which Christian gladly agreed, still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that a girl could shop that much in the course of one single day.

When they got back to the hotel, the young brunette had her bags sent to her room, and the two young people ate together at the hotel's restaurant. In order to not change the atmosphere they had during the whole day, neither of them spoke, both enjoying they miso soup in silence until Anastasia decided to inform Christian of her plans for the next day,

"Tomorrow I am only going to visit the Sensō-Ji Temple. I don't want to exhaust myself since I have every intention of going clubbing at night."

Christian nodded, making Anastasia narrow her eyes at him as she questioned, "You're not going to try and dissuade me from it?"

"I know you won't be able to lose me in a club. And the only instruction I have been given is to look after you. If you want to invent yourself unnecessary boundaries, do it."

She seemed slightly taken aback from his answer, but still ended up smiling of satisfaction as she saw that her wish to go clubbing was going to be granted. Though Christian didn't doubt for a second that she would wait after the night at the club to inform her father of her outing.

When the waiter came to take away their bowls, Christian noticed something in the way he was looking at them that he didn't like. It was something that he noticed several times during the day, and that was making him uncomfortable. People were looking at Anastasia and him as if they were a couple. He didn't know how this image formed in people's mind, but it was clear in their eyes that the two foreigners that they were, were in a couple. And it bothered him, especially knowing that he had two weeks coming of being close to the brunette.

But just as he was wondering how he was going to resist the temptation, Anastasia gave him the perfect opportunity to do so. The waiter put in front of her tofu cubes with rice and edamame, before giving Christian his yakitori, and just as Christian was about to dig into his food, she said,

"I actually never thought that I'd ever had to eat in tête-à-tête with a murderer."

"Murderer?" Christian repeated, slightly amused by her choice of words. He knew that Raymond never really told his daughter the full extent of his main occupation, or how he made his money, but he also knew that Raymond never lied to his daughter. He would answer when she would ask, and apparently, Anastasia always made a point to avoid some major questions. Christian was sure that a part of her knew the truth, but that she would rather stay under the sweet numbing impression that her father was a simple businessman.

"I heard that you were the one who killed Uncle Eric. Even if the police doesn't have any proof against you," She lowly whispered with an accusatory tone, but all Christian could linger on was the small word that preceded Eric's name. That simple word allowed him to understand the Eric had been closer to Raymond than he ever imagined if his daughter was going around calling him Uncle.

But that didn't make his amusement go away, far from it. It even made him smirk as he told the brunette, "Well, in that case, you better behave for the next couple of weeks. It's not good to play with the patience of a murderer the police can't catch."

Anastasia looked at him with big rounded blue eyes as she uttered with shock, "You're not even going to try and deny it?"

"I'm not even going to _comment_ on it. I am not here to entertain little girls' wild imagination."

She looked at him, her mouth hanging open as one of her chopsticks fell off her hand. But after barely two seconds, the shock gleaming in her eyes was replaced by pure anger, "You're an asshat, you know that right?! I can't believe I had a thing for you!"

For a second, Christian found himself speechless, not liking hearing those words in her mouth. As long as his attraction to the petite brunette was something that was going only one way, as long as it was unsaid, he knew he would be able to fight the temptation; but now that she just admitted to him that she was attracted to him as well, Christian had to conjure all his self-control to remain impassible.

"Don't flatter yourself, you have nothing appealing for a guy to show interest in you," He retorted, showing no emotions whatsoever as he said those words.

Anastasia hiccuped, clearly hurt by his words, and after staring deep into his grey eyes, she brusquely rose from her chair and left their table with dignity, making Christian feel bad about himself. He knew he shouldn't have attacked her like that, but it was the only way he found to defend himself against the impulse of reaching out for her. For a while, he stayed seated at the table, before guilt finally took over him, and he went upstairs to her room in order to apologise.

He knocked at her door and was surprised to have it fly open within the two following seconds. Anastasia glared at him, before she snapped, "Don't bother apologising, Christian. You're an asshole, you're an asshole. There's nothing to add to it."

"I didn't mean it like that," Christian defended himself, passing his hand in his coppered hair, and making Anastasia snort,

"I know. It's not me, it's my Dad. Or 'don't worry, you could have any man, as long as Daddy dearest approves of him'."

Christian sighed, powerless over her words. She was right. If it wasn't for her father, he would have tried to seduce her long ago. And he knew that he wasn't the only one thinking like that. Anastasia was hot and making any man's blood circulation suddenly difficult when she was around.

She expectantly waited for him to reply something, but when it became obvious that she was right, and that he had nothing to say that would prove her wrong, she did something that Christian was not expecting her to do in a million years. She tiptoed herself and pressed her soft pink lips against his own. Christian immediately stepped back, swallowing hard the lust that she just awoken in him, and he sternly stated,

"Well, that's a _very_ bad idea."

Anastasia stared deep into his eyes, searching them before she closed the distance between them and trailed her fingers up his chest. Christian's heartbeat accelerated as he could feel her breath caressing his skin, and she whispered to him, "It's only a bad idea if you tell. Don't think I didn't see you checking me out. Let's just ... get on with it and unleash both our sexual frustration."

And just as she said those words, she kissed him, slipping her hands beneath Christian's shirt. He raised his hands to put some distance between them, but as soon as her fingers came into contact with his skin, it was as if a dan broke inside of him, and he found himself pulling her closer, instead of pushing her away.

In a matter of seconds, he had her in his arms, walking them into her room and laying her on her bed, nibbling her lower lip whilst his hands were firmly cupping her rear. Once he was hovering over her, he didn't give her much of a choice, and he broke their kiss, only to help her out of her white shirt, revealing a lacy black bra. Then, he resumed on kissing her, his right hand tightly knot in her voluminous chestnut hair, whilst his left hand was winding up her thigh, getting closer and closer to her secret garden at each turn.

As he briefly brushed her sweet spot through her panties, she moaned, and he repressed a grunt for he could feel that she was already wet. He left her lips, only to leave wet kisses all the way to the conjunction between her neck and her shoulder, making her squirm beneath him, and buck her hips to him. And when he imprisoned the soft and delicate skin of her neck between his teeth, he pushed her panty on the side and started massaging her clitoris.

He relished in hearing her exhale of pleasure, and the hand that was in her hair found its way to her firm and perky breast, to knead it through the lacy bra. And just as he was about to enter a finger in her, the realisation of who he was laying with came down to him, like a bucket of cold water. He stopped what he was doing, and got up from the bed, closing his eyes and breathing deeply through his nose.

"Don't overthink it," Anastasia said, getting on her knees on the bed so she could be at the same level as Christian. "Just for this once. We both want it. Don't think about my Dad when you have your hands under my skirt."

Christian swallowed with difficulty, closing his eyes once again, whilst keeping his hands fisted at his side. "I shouldn't be here."

"Christian, _please_," She pleaded, her hands on his shoulders before her lips kissed his neck. Christian remained stoic, knowing that he should leave, but not having the will to do so; and Anastasia used the opportunity to undo the buttons of his shirt, unknowingly playing with his nerves every time her fingers touched his skin.

"_Please_, make me feel good," She insisted, her hands going for his buckle, and once it was undone, Christian's high moral was gone, disregarded on the floor next to his shirt.

He reopened his eyes, taking Anastasia's face between his hands and looking deep into her blue eyes before he passionately kissed her, laying her back on the bed. Then, he kissed his way downward, stopping at her breast to help her out of bra and play with her nipples and his tongue. Something that she seemed to appreciate since she gripped his hair and arched her back to him, vividly sucking in air through her mouth.

He removed her skirt, taking her panty with it, but just as he was about to leave her breast for her sweeter spot, a question startled him, and he stopped looking up, "You're not a virgin, are you?"

Anastasia negatively shook her head, her whole body begging for Christian to resume what he was doing a second earlier, and he happily complied, dipping his head between her thighs and tasting her sweet bud. He heard her repress a small scream that turned into a moan once he put a finger in her. He added another finger, relishing on how wet she was for him, and nibbling her sweet spot. As her breath started to be more and more rare, Christian accelerated his movements, until he felt her inner walls quiver around his fingers and Anastasia released a loud,

"_God, Christian_!"

With gentleness, Christian slowed down his motions, until he felt that she was down her high; and then, he slowly kissed his way back up. When he was about to kiss her again, Anastasia reached down to get rid of his trousers and boxers, but even though Christian let her undress him, he stopped her from going further. Instead, he got off the bed, reaching for his trousers under Anastasia's worried gaze, and he took a condom out his wallet.

Once on, he climbed back into bed and took her hands when she tried to get acquainted with his member, steadying them above her head. Slowly, his other hand guided manhood toward her entrance, going in with as much delicateness as possible. Christian had always known that Mother Nature had been very generous to him, and more than once, it had made him have to restrain himself whilst being with a woman. But he always took it as a blessing, because he always felt that it made him more aware and sensitive of the woman's needs in bed.

But to his surprise, he kept going and going inside of Anastasia, until he was fully in. Once fully in, he gave her time to adjust to his size, and then started thrusting, letting go of her hands only to cup her face. She had her eyes closed, panting and moving to the rhythm of Christian's own hips.

"Open your eyes for me, Anastasia. I want to see your eyes when you come for me," He told her, in a tone more demanding than he was expecting, but still she did it.

Knowing that he would soon reach his climax, Christian reached for her legs and threw them above his shoulders, keeping his eyes on her blue sapphire until she rolled them backwards, screaming his name and taking him with her on cloud nine.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚** Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed **💚

**.**

💚** So ... well, at least you didn't have to wait long to see how Ana would lure Christian into her hands ... well, bed.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of the relationship between Christian and Jose? And about Christian's suspicions concerning Jose's sexuality?**

💚**So, now, how do you feel about this step that is made into their relationship?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Well, __could you give me the title of the other story then. Because this is a story that I completely wrote myself and I would like to see if someone may have stolen it. Maybe they didn't, but it already happened, so I just want to check._

**Guest2****: **_I knooooow, so much tension, and ell, apparently, they couldn't wait much longer._

**Guest3****: **_Why thank you. Hope you liked this update just as much._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	6. Chapter 5: Night Agreements

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 5****: Night Agreements (3,9K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Though he was sleeping in the most peaceful state he had felt in months, Christian still woke up in the middle of the night with a jolt. He snapped his eyes open, all his senses in alert and his whole body tensed as he tried to understand what could have woken him up so unnaturally like that. His first instincts were to grab the gun he always had under his pillows, no matter where he slept; but then, he recalled what had happened the night before and that securing a gun next to his bed wasn't in his mind when he fell asleep.

For a moment, he did not move, his eyes going everywhere as he analysed his surroundings, wondering if someone was maybe in the room. But when he finally rationalised himself, his brain finally free of sleep, he figured that he probably woke up on his own, not used to _sleep_ with girls. Well, he often more than once brought a girl to his place to share his bed, but he never actually slept with the girl. Either they would leave just after the deed, either Christian would spend a sleepless night, staying in the living room.

Silently, and doing his best to not wake the brunette, he sat up; but just as he was about to get up and use the bathroom, he found himself staring at the naked girl spread on the bed. The sheets covered most of her body, but she still managed to tuck some beneath her arm, exposing her shoulder and upper back to Christian.

Without being even able to stop himself, Christian removed the few strands of hair that were covering her face and revelled on admiring her visage. And as he did so, Christian saw that there was one more feature about Anastasia's face he could obsess about. He never paid attention to her face as a whole, because every time he had looked at her, he had mostly looked at her eyes, at the way they were so blue and so deep, at the way he felt that he could get lost in them, and not mind for a single moment. But now that he was really looking at her face, Christian realised that Anastasia's lips were as mesmerising as her eyes. They were plump and red, with that perfectly well-drawn cupid bow above them. For a moment, Christian actually wondered if her lips were actually naturally red, or if they seemed red due to the lack of light.

Gently, he let his fingers barely brush the side of her, going all the way up her forehead, down to her jaw that made her face look like a heart. Then, he caressed her lips, his eyes still looking at her face; and a sudden urge to bend down and kiss her washed over him, forcing him to get up with urgency. With all the difficulty of the world, he looked away from the sleeping brunette, before grabbing his clothes from the floor (making sure to take his gun with him) and heading to the bathroom.

After doing what he had to do, Christian considered taking a shower; but that idea was cut short when his phone fell out of his pocket, revealing the reason why he woke up in the first place. He had a missed call from Raymond. For a second, Christian remained frozen, staring at his locked screen, a part of his brain wondering how he did not remember that his boss had told him that he would call him during the night, whilst another part of his brain was doing its best to stop him for overthinking that he just had sex with _Anastasia Steele_.

And finally, it was a duty that prevailed, and he swiftly dressed back, splashing his face with cold water before sliding to the right the little missed icon, in order to call back Raymond. A tiny part of him hoped that Raymond would be occupied otherwise and wouldn't answer, but Christian knew that it was wishful thinking. Anastasia meant the world to her father, and Christian saw on more than one occasion Raymond postpone a meeting to take a call from his daughter.

And just as to prove his point, Raymond answered at the first ring, saying with a patronising tone, "You didn't have to call me right back, Christian. I understand that you need to sleep like the rest of us."

"I woke up naturally," Christian spontaneously lied as he exited the bathroom. After all, a soldier was always supposed to be ready to duty no matter the time.

Naturally, his eyes landed on Anastasia's sleeping form as he walked through the room, and he stopped once he was in front of the window, getting a full view of the city of Tokyo by night. He heard Raymond sigh a little on the other end of the phone, making him frown as he wondered if everything was alright back in the US.

"How was your day?"

Christian hesitated, trying to find the right words to describe what he wouldn't qualify as the best day of his life. Far from it. The night, on the other hand ...

"It was very ... _girly_."

Raymond overtly laughed at that comment, and Christian wondered for a sparse second if Raymond knew that his daughter was going to make him suffer through shopping sprees and other girly things, viciously punishing Christian like that. Though Christian had no idea what Raymond would want to punish him about. Well, ... as far as Raymond was concerned.

"She didn't try to sneak out on you?" Raymond asked, surprise clear in his tone, and it was Christian's turn to laugh. Though his laugh was definitely more moderate than Raymond's.

"She did. But I think that your daughter is clever enough to know when a cause is lost and that she made herself a reason early in the morning. You don't have to worry about that, Boss. She won't slip through my fingers."

"I know. That's why I sent _you_ with her. I know that you won't fail me and that she won't manage to bat her lashes at you and get you to leave her on her own in a city where I have so many enemies."

Christian didn't reply anything, mostly because his throat became incredibly tight when Raymond mentioned that he knew he wouldn't fail him. He was more than failing him at this very moment, he was actually betraying him. But Christian didn't have much time to linger on that notion as Raymond asked as if to push on Christian's guilt,

"Anyway, anything you would like to report?"

Christian glanced back at the bed where the brunette hadn't moved since he got up, and his mouth naturally formed words that he did not will out, "Unless you want to put some boundaries on the places your daughter goes to, when in Japan, no."

"She wants to go clubbing," Raymond said, and Christian could actually picture his boss with half a smile on his lips, knowing his daughter too well to actually ask the question. He was simply stating the fact.

"Affirmative."

"Let her. Ana can be quite a nightmare when she's pissed off, and I don't want to put that on you. Just make sure she goes to bed _alone_."

Christian didn't even get to appreciate the irony of the words Raymond just uttered, though it wasn't lost on him. Raymond asking him to make sure that Anastasia's bed wouldn't be too crowded when he just crawled out of it ... Still, the irony of the situation wasn't what he bounced back on, instead he assured Raymond of his goodwill,

"Will do, Sir."

"Anyway, I shouldn't bother you any longer. Go get some sleep, Christian. In fact, you should be the one calling if anything goes wrong. I know that time difference can be a bit of a hassle to handle."

And on those words, Raymond hung up, leaving Christian alone with the sound of silence. For a moment, Christian didn't move, his eyes lost on the view of the illuminated city whilst his mind was doing its best to not think of what he just did. After what seemed like an indefinite amount of time, Christian slightly heaved and turned his back on the large window.

His eyes automatically fell on the brunette, and he wondered for a moment what he should do. The simple rule of one-nightstands was dictating him to go back to his room, and let her enjoy the rest of her sleep alone; but somehow, Christian felt like it would be tacky for him to do so.

So instead, he just sat on the armchair facing the bed, his eyes set on Anastasia as his mind was everywhere. Under the moonlight, Christian noticed that Anastasia looked like a porcelain doll. He didn't know if it was the fact that she was so damn petite or the way the moonlight rays reflected on her skin; but the more he was looking at her, the more it seemed as if he was looking at a porcelain doll from the 19th century._ A naked one_.

And in fact, the more he looked at the brunette, the more he was seeing her differently. He always thought of her as someone who was hot. Even though he never admitted it out loud, there was no point in denying it. Anastasia was hot, Ryan repeated this fact enough time to him for him to acknowledge it. But as he was looking at her peacefully sleeping, it stroke Christian that she was more than hot, she was more than sexy, and she was far from being cute.

She was beautiful.

Christian had never seen any picture of Raymond's late wife, but since Anastasia shared very little features with her father, he figured that she took everything from her mother. And if the late Mrs Steele was as beautiful as her daughter was, Christian could easily understand why Raymond never remarried. If he was honest with himself, Christian actually doubted to have seen a woman that was more beautiful than the one sleeping in front of him. He had met and bedded, sexier ones, but Anastasia was by far the most beautiful.

He was actually conflicted about the development of the evening. It was more than the fact that he had sex with a forbidden girl, it was the fact that he _slept with_ the said girl, and that if he was listening to his wants, right now, he would gladly crawl back to bed next to her and sleep with her in his arms. This was the disturbing part. It was that he was willing and wanting to do this thing for the first time of his life when he clearly shouldn't.

And that let Christian ponder on what would Raymond do to him when he would learn what Christian had done to his precious and beloved daughter. Because Christian was sure of one thing, one way or another, Raymond would find out. Raymond Steele always knew _everything_. And Christian knew that this encounter he had with Anastasia would somehow be known by his boss.

He tried to think like his boss did, trying to see what would be his punishment, but he couldn't tell for sure. Would Raymond give him a chance to grovel and apologise, or would he kill him on the spot? Well, knowing Raymond's short temper when it came to his daughter's wellbeing, Christian was most likely to be killed on the spot. Now, how, remained the question. And still, Christian couldn't find it in himself to regret following Anastasia into her room, and into her bed. He enjoyed every minute of it, and there was even a part of him who wished he could have a second round, despite knowing that he would die as soon as he would land on US soil.

As Christian was thinking about his imminent death, Anastasia stirred a little in her bed, making Christian refocus his attention solely on her (and no longer on his inevitable demise). He watched her scoot beneath the sheets, whilst her small hand patted the empty space next to her, apparently looking for something. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes, blinking with obvious sleep still fogging her vision, and she upped herself on her elbows, her head tilted as she set her gaze on Christian.

They remained silent for a few seconds, Christian stoic, even though she gave him a small smile, and even though he wanted nothing more than to go by her side, and tame her wild hair down her face.

"What are you doing there?" She asked, before frowning, her smile leaving abruptly as she added, "And why are you dressed?"

"I think I should go back to my room," Christian platonically said as he got up, securing his gun in his back, between his skin and his trousers.

He avoided looking at her in the eyes, because of _damn those blue eyes_! He actually avoided looking in her direction because if he was honest to himself, he was loving that her voice was a little more hoarse than usual. He was loving it so much that it was taking him a lot to not jump on the bed and make her scream again his name so loud, she would have a voice even more cracked in the morning.

"Why?" She inquired, and Christian could swear he heard a hint of panic in her voice. "You can stay here. The night isn't over, yet."

"That would be _yet_ another bad idea," Christian pointed out, his hand already on the handle, ready to leave the room.

"Well, some bad ideas turn out to create great things. Look at Tarte Tatin." ***💚***

"We said _one time_," Christian reminded the brunette, though he had no idea why she was talking about French pastries when they were talking about mistakes and bad ideas.

"And the night isn't over," She pointed out to him as if he was simple-minded. " Just come back to bed, even if it's just to sleep. You look deadly tired."

Christian gritted his teeth, wondering why she had to make it so hard on him. After all, he was a guy, and surely she should know that men had difficulties refusing things to beautiful women. Especially when they asked naked, with their hair wild with sex, and their voice throaty.

He knew that he should simply ignore her and open the door to go into his own room, that he should physically distance himself from her and that it would make it easier for him, but he couldn't. He couldn't move, he couldn't talk, he could only stare blankly at the wooden door before his eyes, his hand gripping the handle so tightly that his knuckles were white.

He heard Anastasia get off the bed, and walk until she was next to him; and then she rested her hand on his shoulder, making him turn his head to look at her. At least she threw a sheet over her body, so he didn't have to jump on her as soon as his eyes landed on her. She gave him a small smile, lowly whispering,

"Don't take it as a continuation of what happened earlier. Take it as an efficient way to check that I won't sneak out on you in the morning."

Then, without waiting for him to agree on anything, she took his hand in hers and lead him to the bed. She laid back there, her eyes expectantly looking at him, and with a sigh, Christian surrendered, cursing his lack of will on this situation. He stripped to his boxers, putting his gun on the nightstand, within his reach, and as soon as his head hit the pillow, Anastasia put her own head on his torso, falling asleep minutes later, and quickly followed by Christian into Morpheus's land.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

When Christian woke up the next morning, it was to a nice feeling that he never experienced before. It was actually something very pleasant that made him smile before even opening his eyes. But eventually he did, only to meet a blue pair of eyes smiling at him. His first instincts were to smile as well, and his smile grew even wider when he understood what woke him up. Anastasia's hand was gently stroking him above his boxers, making harder at each stroke.

Without thinking about it for one second, Christian brought his hand to her hair and guided her face to his so he could deeply kiss her. When their tongues intertwined, her grip on him got tighter; and so, he directed his free hand between her legs, only to have the pleasure to feel how wet she already was for him. As soon as his fingers caressed her most intimate spot, Anastasia moaned against Christian's lips, before she boldly straddled him, her hand still between them, pleasuring him as much as he was about to pleasure her. She broke heir kiss, only to imprison his lower lip between her teeth, nibbling it a little as Christian was rubbing her sweet little nub.

For a moment the two of them played like that, pleasuring one another in a silence that was only broken by her moans and his groans; but when Christian felt that she was guiding his manhood toward her entrance, he had a cold call back to reality, and rolled them over so they could immediately stop what they were doing.

As they were both layings on their backs, facing the dull ceiling, Anastasia's hand spidered its way on Christian's torso, and when it started going lower, Christian firmly took her hand in his, as he strongly stated, "No."

"I just want to be on top," She argued with a small voice that made Christian wish he didn't have to refuse her; but still, he sat up, on the edge of the bed, putting his elbows on his knees and his hands behind his neck as he explained,

"And this isn't an option. You or I on top won't happen. I don't have any more condoms."

This installed a small silence between the two of them, until Anastasia came to him, resting her chin on his shoulder as she proposed, "Well ... I was thinking this morning ... Maybe ... maybe we should buy some."

At first, Christian didn't reply anything, not thinking too much into it. But then, his brain started overthinking this whole situation, and he brusquely got up, towering her with his body as he imperially demanded,

"Did you _plan_ this?"

"_What_? What do you mean?"

"You said yesterday night that you had a thing for me! You lured me into your bed! And now, what we clearly agreed to be a one-time thing, is turning into something longer in your mind! So, I'm asking again: did you plan this?!"

Christian looked at the young girl in the eyes, daring her to lie to his face, but the first emotion that he saw in her blue orbs was shock, swiftly followed by hurt. But before Christian could even think of apologising, or explaining to Anastasia that his mind was just trying to find a logical explanation about what happened between them, her face turned red with anger, and she rose to her knees, her hands on her hips as she pointed an accusing finger toward him,

"How _dare_ you?! Do you really think that I am that twisted?! _Seriously_?! Can't it just be that I like to speak my mind and that there is an attraction between the two of us that neither of us can deny?! It _has_ to be some twisted and convoluted masterplan?

For your information, Mister Evil Genius, I didn't want you on this damn trip! I didn't want you near me when there would be no one else around! My Dad forced you into my plans! It was you, or no Japan! I didn't want you here! I didn't want my fantasy to become a reality …"

She finally stopped talking, looking down on the bed as her chest was quickly rising and falling from her burst of temper, and her face still red of emotion. But all Christian could think of, were her last words.

"Your fantasy?"

Anastasia looked back up, a fiery look illuminating her eyes and daring him to make fun of her as she responded, "_Yes_! As I said, there is an attraction between us, and ... well, sometimes dreams are better left at what they are, or you end up disappointed."

Christian couldn't help but smirk at this comment, which only made Anastasia look back down, sitting down as she confessed, with a voice so low that Christian had to strain his ear, "And ... as for the duration of that one-night thing ... Well, I thought that it was clear for the two of us that 'one time' meant the whole two weeks. I mean, what's the point of getting it on, and then the two of us will be awkward for the rest of the two weeks to come? We could ... I don't know, pretend that we are in Vegas. You know, that all 'what happens in Japan, stays in Japan'?"

As he sat back on the bed, Christian thought with irony that if what happened yesterday had happened in Vegas, one of the city who had the most video surveillance in the world, Raymond would _definitely_ be aware of it. And he would probably get Christian killed in Vegas, so what happened Vegas would indeed remain in Vegas.

"I just want this moment we could share in Japan to be part of my fantasy when we go back home," Anastasia said, and Christian remained silent at those words, his mind going to Jose.

He recalled how his best friend tried to cheer him up by telling him to take this mission to Japan as a vacation. Maybe this was what he should do. Maybe he should enjoy the moment as it was coming and stop thinking so much of what was waiting for him once he would get back home. After all, if he was already a dead man, he should probably enjoy to the most his last days on Earth, and do what he wanted to do. And lately, his mind was set on doing Anastasia. And, on the off-chance that Raymond would never know about what happened between Christian and his daughter, Christian would still have nice memories to go back to.

"What about you? What do you want?" Anastasia asked, her small hand resting on his shoulder and compelling him to look at her. Which he did, before he cupped her face and caressed her cheek with his thumb and told her,

"I think it would be nice to have a fantasy to think of when we get back home."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

***💚* The Tarte Tatin is a famous French apple pie that was famously invented out of a mistake. **

** 💚So is this the beginning of their relationship? I think it is. Or maybe I'm just playing with you. You know, me being evil and all. But see, I didn't put any cliffhanger.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What are your thoughts concerning the conversation between Raymond and Christian?**

💚**How do you feel about Christian's thoughts and his sentiments toward Ana? (Please note that thus far, she is still only Anastasia to him)**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Mar: **_Well, will Raymond find out is the big question at the end of the last chapter ... And so far, he doesn't know ... So far... And well, Jose is a bit more complicated than that... You shall see later. _

**Guest1: **_Yeah, he clearly had no self-control there... But as he said, he'd been wanting her in his bed for three years now. There was no point in me showing those three years of torture. And Ana is 20 and has had boyfriends before Christian. Short-lived, but still... _

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	7. Chapter 6: A Week In Tokyo

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 6****: A Week In Tokyo (9,9K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's point-of-view**

Over breakfast, Anastasia explained to Christian her plans for the day, letting him know that she was no longer interested with the idea of going clubbing that night and that she would rather spend a traditional Japanese day. Christian didn't argue, mostly because he knew that no matter her program, he was bound to follow her anywhere she would go. Of course, his disinterest on her whereabouts was suddenly shaken when she told him that they needed to go shopping, _once again_.

"What? Didn't you shop all day long yesterday, already? Can't you put _at least one_ day between shopping sessions?" He couldn't help but ask.

He knew that this liberty of speech wasn't due to the fact that they had just spent the night together, but more to the fact that he knew his patience was wearing thin when it came to endlessly go from shop to shop for hours, checking every item on display. Whether they had shared a bed or not the night before, Christian would have had stopped Anastasia from shopping twice in a row.

"Yesterday was barely a warm-up, trust me," She retorted with a smile that Christian qualified as evil. The idea that she could put him through even more shopping was simply evil. "Besides, we can't decently go to a temple dressed as Occidentals. I refuse to be that sort of tourists."

"So you'd rather be the tourist who steals the country's culture and pride?"

Anastasia rose her eyebrows at him before she refocused her attention on her breakfast and told him with a very calming tone as if she was talking to a simpleminded child,

"No, I'd rather be the kind of tourist who respects enough the country's culture and traditions to bend to them. _When in Rome, do as the Romans do_. I'm just abiding by that saying. Had I had gone to Saudi Arabia, I would have worn a hijab, and certainly wouldn't have worn mini-skirts or trousers. Being a tourist doesn't mean you get to scorch on the traditions of the country you're visiting because it's not your way of life. _You _are the one who is welcomed in this country, it's like when you enter a house, you respect the rules of said house."

"So, if you ever go to France, you'll wear a beret and a marinière?" Christian joked, making the brunette in front of him roll her eyes as she got up and instructed,

"Stop stalling, we have kimonos to buy and places to go to."

Then, she left to go back to her room, Christian shortly on her heels, not that he wanted to, but because he didn't have a choice.

For the most part of the day, Christian didn't have to complain. Actually, except for the first hour of the day spent shopping for kimonos for the two of them (because Anastasia was really tenacious as to have them both dress according to tradition), they had a day rather enjoyable. Mostly because Christian saw what Jose had meant when he told her to take those two weeks as vacations at the boss's expenses.

If he was forgoing the fact that he was around Anastasia for her security, and talking to the girl, Christian realised that Jose was right. She was a person he would enjoy spending time with, outside of work. Sure, as they visited the Sensō-Ji Temple and the Imperial Palace, Christian clearly felt like he was a lost child and she was the responsible parent. It was more than she was fluent in the language, it was that she had clearly done her research before coming and that she knew exactly what she wanted to do, and where she wanted to go. But besides her vast knowledge of the Japanese culture and history, Anastasia was a pleasant person to talk to.

Of course, at first she had to ignite every conversation because Christian didn't want to cross the line even more than he already did; but at some point, the line disappeared on its own. Christian still couldn't tell exactly how it did, it was somewhere between them having lunch, and walking in the gardens of the Imperial Palace, but it still happened. Christian found himself asking her how come she knew so much about Japan when he doubted that he knew that much about his own country.

Anastasia explained to him that Japan was where her mother was born. Apparently, her two parents (Anastasia's grandparents) worked there when little Carla came into this world; and they only left the country of the rising sun for the US when Carla was eighteen. Anastasia didn't linger much on that topic, closing the conversation by saying that Japan had been on her to-do list ever since she was little and that she had always known that she would have to go on her own. Christian didn't push her, though the thought lingered in his mind.

Raymond had only mentioned twice to Christian his late wife. When he recruited him and referred to the Wilks's as his in-laws, and when Christian saw the glimpse of a picture in his boss's pocket watch, Raymond had told him in a very firm tone that wasn't allowing any conversation, that it was his late wife. Christian barely knew that her name had been Carla because Jose had told him much. For all the times Christian went to the mansion, he never saw a picture of Anastasia's mother, even though he had more than once paid visits to Raymond in his private chambers.

And this made Christian wonder why Raymond was so closed concerning his deceased wife. He knew it wasn't a question of intimacy, because Raymond never hesitated on talking about his daughter to Christian, so it had to be something else. But he didn't think too much about it, a part of him deciding that he would definitely ask Jose about it when they would get back home.

When the day was over, they returned to the hotel, with Anastasia mocking Christian for he was complaining that never again he would be caught wearing setta sandals again. After a copious dinner, they went each back to their rooms, and as soon as he was out of his Japanese clothing, Christian washed his feet before sitting on his bed and taking his laptop out of his bag.

When he had packed his bag, Christian mostly took it to read the news and pass time whilst waiting for Anastasia to wakeup, because he knew that he didn't sleep as much as other people did. He was one of those lucky people who could go to bed late, and wake up early, without it damaging his system, and he never went against it for it always came naturally to him.

But as he switched on his laptop, he had no intention of keeping himself entertained. For a second, he hesitated, realising that during all his years of services, he never researched anything about his boss. He knew who was Raymond Steele. He was a crime lord, a kingpin, a man not to be meddled with if you cared for your life and the life of those you held dear. So, he never got the point of looking even more into his boss's life. But something about the way Anastasia talked about her father's reactions toward Carla's death was nagging Christian. He couldn't tell what exactly, but over the years, he had learnt to always trust his instincts over his logics

He looked for articles concerning Carla Wilks/Steele but barely found anything. He found an article mentioning that she died in a fire incident during a charity event, and another article saying that she was buried in Green-Wood cemetery, and that Raymond didn't attend the funerals, unlike the other members of her family.

Suddenly, Christian was startled by a knock on his door, which made him frown because he didn't like being surprised, especially when he was out of his element. He took his gun out, not taking the time to put a shirt on and checking through the peephole who could be disturbing him in this country where he knew no one.

But he saw that it was only Anastasia, and he opened his door to her, keeping his gun hidden from her by only revealing half of his body to her. He caught the way she looked at the gun the night before and figured that guns made her uncomfortable. Whether it was the weapon in itself or the fact that _he_ was the one in charge of it was still a mystery to Christian.

"What can I do for you?" Christian asked, an eyebrow up as he took in her clothing. She too had changed into occidental clothes, but it was a bit more elaborate than Christian's simple pyjama trousers. She was wearing denim shorts with a pale yellow tank top and sandals. Christian could smell that she took a shower, and he could also tell that she wasn't wearing a bra.

"Did you change your plans concerning clubbing?" Was the first question that came to his mind, though he wasn't sure since her face was makeup-free.

Anastasia seemed slightly taken aback, before she shook her head at him, squinting a bit her eyes as she told him, "We aren't going clubbing as long as you hang around wearing those damn trousers that give the impression you're just out of a funeral."

Christian smirked at her, her words echoing what Ryan often reproached him. Even when going out, he never let loose enough, and it showed just in the way he dressed.

"Aren't you going to invite me in?" Anastasia said with a tone that almost sounded innocent if it wasn't for her long lashes batting luxuriously at him.

Christian barely hesitated a second, stepping aside to let her in, before he swiftly went to his laptop to close it. He heard the brunette chuckle behind him, and when he turned to ask her what was funny, she asked, "Were you watching porn to close that laptop so quickly?"

"If I were watching porn, you would already be on this bed, on your back, screaming my name," Christian retorted, putting his gun on his nightstand under Anastasia's very steady gaze.

"Then, maybe you should have been watching porn, instead of … doing whatever you were doing."

Christian smirked, putting his laptop back in his bag, and then fully facing the small brunette. He kept his eyes on her face, whilst her own eyes ravaged his exposed torso, lingering a bit longer on his waistband before she looked back up at him.

"So … Do I always have the one to make the first step?" She challenged, and Christian made a step to close the distance between them.

She immediately lifted her head, closing her eyes, ready to receive a kiss, but he did not deliver. Instead, he brushed her lips with his thumb, making sure their bodies were close enough to feel each other's warmth, but still not touching. He leant a little until his lips were at the level of her ear; and then, whispered,

"Maybe I like it when you pursue me. Ever thought of that?"

"Who knew that a big guy like you, could be such a girl inside," She teased, tiptoeing herself in an attempt to kiss him. But Christian didn't help, straightening up, and keeping just the right distance to infuriate her just a little. "Come on, don't tell me I just wounded your male ego, and I got all flustered for nothing."

Christian rose an eyebrow at her, refraining himself for laughing, and she let herself fall back on her heels, her lips sweetly pouting. Christian tugged a little on her chin to erase the put form her face, before he reminded her of something crucial, "As I recall, you kept the condoms we bought this morning in your room. And I don't want to get all … _flustered_ right now, only to have to run back to there when the moment comes."

Anastasia's eyes opened wide, her mouth forming an 'o' of comprehension. "Well, in that case …"

She took Christian's hand in hers and started walking to his door when he stopped her and went to take his gun. He used the opportunity to put a shirt on, not really eager to strut in the hotel's corridor shirtless. As he secured his gun in his back, between his trousers and skin, Anastasia furrowed her brows, and asked,

"Is this really necessary? We're not even leaving the building."

"Where I go, the gun goes."

His tone was impervious, not allowing any debate on the matter, and Anastasia loudly sighed, before the two of them left to go to her bedroom. She barely had a second to close the door that Christian was taking her in his arms, crushing his lips against hers. She didn't seem to mind the slightest, wrapping her legs around his waist as he moved them toward the bed, never leaving her lips.

Once she was laying on her back, Christian started grinding against her, making her moan against his lips before she gently nibbled his lower lip. Without ever separating their lips, Christian removed his gun from his back and put it on the nightstand; before bringing his hands to her body. He was about to remove her tank top when she stopped him and pushed against his chest so he would give her some space. Which he did, only to be assaulted a second later, and finding himself on his back with Anastasia on top of him.

She smiled at him, slowly retrieving her tank top. She was about to finally reveal her breast to him when she frowned and quickly got up. Christian upped himself on his elbows, a question hanging on his lips, but that was quickly answered when she switched off the light. Then, she came back, retaking her place on Christian's laps, but as she was about kissing him again, he asked her,

"Why did you switch off the light?"

"No girl likes to be fully exposed to artificial light. I thought you'd know that by now or were _you_ a virgin?"

"And all guys are very visual. How about we compromise?" He proposed, switching on the faint light of the nightstand.

She seemed to think about it for a second and nodded. Christian smiled and removed his shirt as she did the same with her top. Once he had full sight of her breast, he stayed motionless for a moment, simply staring at them. They were what he would call the perfect size. Unlike Ryan, he had never been a boobs kind of man, he had always been interested in the assets girls had on their back, rather than on their front. But Anastasia's breasts were just the right size. Not too small, not too big, just ample enough to fit into his hands. That added to the fact that they were firm and perky, standing on their own, it was all Christian could ask for.

Before Anastasia could chastise him for staring too long at her, and that 'no girl would like that', he dove his head and took one of her nipples in his mouth, whilst his hand went to take care of the other, just so there wouldn't be any jealousy between them. Anastasia sucked in a sharp breath, throwing her head backwards, and making the ends of her hair tickle Christian's laps.

She gripped his hair, arching to him when his suction became a little more intense. Christian let his other hand travel on the wonderful curve in her back, a part of his brain wondering how he never noticed this curve before when he caught himself more than once staring at her ass. He bucked a little his hips, just so his bulge would be touching her crotch, and when the fabrics of her shorts and his trousers met, Anastasia moaned a little louder, pressing Christian's face against her chest.

In an expert move, Christian resumed his position on top of her, switching breasts in his mouth, as his free hand unbuttoned her shorts. Slowly, he kissed his way downward, but not without warning her, "I want to hear you scream Anastasia. I want to hear you scream my name."

She nodded, though Christian was sure that she would have agreed to almost anything at this right moment, and then he threw her shorts out of the way, taking her panties along the way. She bucked her hips to him, but Christian only kissed her inner thighs, blowing his breath between her legs and consciously playing with her nerves. Several times he brushed her sweet nub with his thumb, putting just enough pressure to earn shaky breathy whimpers from her.

After yet another one of his tease, Anastasia bucked yet again her hips to him; and said with a voice heavy with lust: "Christian, please."

"Please what, Anastasia?" He asked with a smirk.

"Don't be a dick. _Please, Christian_."

"I thought you wanted a dick," He chuckled, before giving her exactly what she wanted.

Christian had always liked going down on women because he liked being the cause of them letting completely go. Over the years, he observed that women let loose more easily when he went down on them. It was as if a woman had two different persons inside her. One that would still be in control of herself during the penetration, no matter what; and one that could completely become undone when he would go down on them.

As Anastasia's breath became more and more ragged, Christian introduced two fingers in her, nibbling her inner thighs when her wetness enveloped his fingers. He relished when she moaned a little more loudly and used his thumb to rub her little nub, kissing his way back up. Gently, he tempted a third finger, reaping a victorious 'yes' out of her, coming out deep and throaty.

When he was finally back to the level of her face, Christian watched her bite her lips as his fingers kept on making her feel good. He kissed her to release her lips, and then told her in a husky voice,

"Let go, Anastasia. Scream for me."

He watched her attempt to keep a little control as his fingers thrust in her faster and faster, and his thumb added a little more pressure to his strokes; and finally, she screamed out his name, opening her eyes widely as her whole body tensed. Christian helped her coming down from her high, his fingers still slightly playing inside of her. When she was again in control of her breathing, Anastasia turned her head to Christian, all smiles with her hair dishevelled, and her eyes glossy with bliss; and suddenly, her happy smile turned into something devious.

She sat on top of him, her hands playing his waistband, as she asked with a pretence innocence, "Maybe I should return the favour."

Christian sat to kiss her and kept on going with the events the night was promising. He knew he was well endorsed, and often, it scared women. Which was one of the reasons why he always made sure to prepare them well enough during foreplays, and also the reason why he, more often than once, refused a blowjob.

But before he could distract Anastasia from her task, she pushed him back so he was laying on his back; she kissed her way downward, just like he did a few moments ago. She played with his waistband, and Christian used this opportunity to try and dissuade her one last time,

"You don't have to do it. I went down because I like it."

She was about to retort something when she finally pulled down his pyjama trousers.

"_Holy shit_! How did _that_ fit inside me?!"

Christian let his head hit the pillow, refraining himself from heaving and simply closing his eyes and clenching his teeth when she added,

"I figured that it was big, but … It's bigger than _me_! How in the Hell did you manage to fit _that_ in me? Are you some kind of magician?"

Christian didn't answer, clenching his teeth a little harder. He only reopened his eyes, when he felt that Anastasia had sat up and that her face was back to his. He kept his face void of emotions when their eyes clashed, and Anastasia told him with a small voice,

"You know, usually guys are embarrassed to have a tiny pecker. Usually, when they have a monster-cock like yours, they brag and can't stop talking about it."

"I am _not_ embarrassed by the size of my dick. You're the one making a big deal out of it."

A smirk grew on her lips, and she retorted with a tease, "Well … there is something big about this deal, indeed. But … I was just surprised. I mean … it is anything but average, and I wasn't prepared to meet something bigger than me in your pants."

"I told you not to go down. If you had listened to me, you would be on your back, screaming through another orgasm as we speak," Christian admonished her because he was far from liking how this conversation was going. It felt like she was talking to him as if he were a kid needing reassurance, and that all the lust from earlier was slowly fading away.

"It can still happen," She said, wiggling her eyebrows at him, but Christian sat up, reaching for his trousers as he reasoned,

"I think it would be best for both of us if I went back to my room."

He knew that the first thing he would do was to take a cold shower, that would probably last a long time given his state of arousal, but he figured it was better than having a girl laughing every time she would look down to his groin.

"_God_, why are guys so self-conscious about their dicks? Seriously! I didn't complain, I didn't laugh or run, screaming like a banshee. I just stated the truth. You have a monster-cock. What's so wrong with that? I mean, I was more than happy yesterday night when that monster-cock was pounding inside me!"

"Why are girls so self-conscious about their bodies?" Christian retorted with an eyebrow up, knowing that she was right. He was mostly annoyed that she was doing a fixation on his 'monster-cock'.

Anastasia opened her mouth to quip like she seemed to like doing so much; but when no comeback came to her, she simply got up from the bed, with as much dignity as her naked self allowed her, and walked straight to the switch, to light on the room.

"_Happy_?"

"_Very_," He replied with the same snappy tone; and when he saw a smile grow on her lips, he knew she would yet again comment on his member.

"It's even bigger with the light on."

Christian rolled her eyes, throwing Anastasia on the bed; but when he hovered over her, she stopped him from kissing her. "I want to be on top." She said with a small pout that very few men would be able to resist.

Christian rolled them both so she would be on top, and she reached to take the condoms on her nightstand. When she had a little foil in her hand, Christian smirked at her as he told, "You want to be on top to have a better peek."

She smirked back, opening the foil as she stated, "That too."

Then, Christian took the condom out of her hands to put it on himself, kissing Anastasia while doing so; and when the protection was on, he guided himself to her entrance. He watched her close her eyes of anticipation, doing exactly what he had wanted to avoid; and so he told her,

"Relax, Anastasia. Or we will never have a repeat of yesterday night."

"I _am_ relaxed."

"Don't think about it," He reassured her, as his thumb rubbed her clitoris to stimulate her again. "Just think of the pleasure I will give you."

When he got that she was no longer thinking of how he would manage to fit inside her without tearing her in half, Christian slowly penetrated her, making her moan, and him, revel once again that he could go so deep without causing her to feel discomfort. It was as if she was made for him. She wasn't even too tight like a few girls had already been for him, she was just perfect.

They barely slept this night, Christian discovering that Anastasia's libido was as high as his stamina could endure. They tried different positions, and from the way her body reacted to each of them, Christian could tell that the one she liked the most was when she was on top of him, laying against him as he would ram inside her, his pelvic bone hitting her clitoris as each thrust. Well, at least it was when she had her most Earth-shattering orgasm, and fell deep into slumber afterwards.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

A few days after their visit to the Imperial Palace, Christian and Anastasia had already found their routine. During the day, they would visit Tokyo, and do all the crazy things Anastasia had planned to do while in Japan (getting traditionally tattooed being one of them though she kept that for her last day in Japan), and when they would go back to their hotel, they would go back to Anastasia's room.

They didn't automatically have sex, there had been a couple of nights when she was too tired to lift a single muscle, and they simply laid one next to the other, talking about everything and nothing. It was during those nights that Christian learnt that Anastasia was more emotionally layered than she appeared to be.

Often, when stuff would get too personal, she would change the topic. Mostly when they started talking about family. Which Christian understood at a certain extent. He didn't like talking about his family either. Raymond had proposed him a few years ago to look for his parents, but Christian refused. Younger, he would have jumped on that golden opportunity given to him; but shortly after having to survive on his own, Christian had buried his parents in his heart. He didn't want to know anything about them, because to him, they were dead.

But Anastasia had a living father who adored her above anything else. Christian knew why Raymond was so paranoid about his daughter's security. He knew it was because Raymond was perfectly aware of two things. Anyone who wanted to destabilise him, to make him weak, to make him waver on his way of life, only had to kill Anastasia to do so. Christian was sure that Raymond would never survive his daughter's death. Second, Raymond would give away his fortune and empire in the blink of an eye if anyone were to kidnap his daughter and ask for ransom. Christian knew that because every time Raymond had told Christian to always detach himself from the job, and from life in general, he used Anastasia as an example of what not to do.

So Christian couldn't understand why Anastasia was so reserved on talking about her familial life. Still, she wasn't shy about the Kavanaghs, the family of her best friend who was living in the same building as him. Elena Kavanagh and Raymond were friends who came from the same neighbourhood. Christian didn't know how they kept contact, and Anastasia never talked about it, but he learnt through this discovery that Raymond owned the whole building he was living in. He gave a whole floor to Elena when she married to Eamon, and now that their children had grown, each had their apartment.

There was Ethan who was the same age as Christian. According to Anastasia, Ethan was the best of the best. Of course, she admitted that her opinion was completely biased since her first crush had been on him. She was fourteen, he was nineteen, always so nice to her, and so well built. She said that he looked like a movie star with his golden hair, and his emeralds green eyes, and his muscles under his shirt. Anastasia also said that Ethan had always been a gentleman about her following him everywhere in the hope that he would kiss her; and that her infatuation with him quickly faded away when she learnt that he was gay.

Then, came Katherine (Kate), Anastasia's best friend. Anastasia and Katherine were born the same year, at exactly six months difference, to the day. Katherine was the sister Anastasia never had. She did everything with her. From their first pitiful attempts of makeup to gossip about their first crushes (when Katherine made fun of Anastasia for crushing on her brother) and their first times. Katherine made Anastasia feel wild when they were together. She was, as Anastasia would call her, her little devil on her shoulder. Except that she was a devil wearing designer clothes and walking around in seven inches heels.

And after Kate, came the Benjamin, Jake. From what Christian could tell, he was Anastasia's favourite. She was talking about him as if he were her own child. Proudly telling him about how he was doing well in school, and how he was growing up to be handsome, that one day he will be even more handsome than his brother. Anastasia was proud of Jake and not afraid to let the whole wide world know it.

Anastasia also talked about Ryan and Jose a lot. She liked them, because unlike the other guys her father always had hovering around her, they treated her as a person, and not just as a job. She liked Ryan best because he always had a joke ready for her, especially when she had been lazy and wasn't training as good as usual. She was sure that she would get a few quips from him when they would go back home.

"You know, to avoid any comments from Ryan, you could keep on training whilst being on vacations," Christian proposed to Anastasia as they were waiting in line for a ride at Disneyland Tokyo.

They had been spending most of their day there, and this was the last ride Anastasia wanted to do, mostly because she had decided that they would go clubbing that same night and that she wanted to take a small power nap before doing so. More than once she wondered out loud if Christian was even human for sleeping so little, making inevitably Christian smirk at her each time she complained about his ability to sleep less than the average person.

"Do you actually know the meaning of the word _vacation_?"

"Well, you're the one who's complaining about being mocked," Christian carelessly reminded her, before he leant to her ear and added, "Besides, exercising would help you not to be sore and cramping in the morning."

Anastasia playfully elbowed him, a small smile on her lips, because every morning she would complain that her whole body was aching for too much sex. Not that she wasn't the first one asking when the night was coming.

"Exercise has nothing to do with that. All of this pain is due to your monster-cock!"

Christian shook his head because he knew that no matter how many times he would tell her to not call it that, Anastasia would endlessly call his member his 'monster-cock'. He was about to bring the conversation on the first topic they broached when Anastasia did it by herself by stating as if nothing,

"Besides, I don't want to bruise your poor male ego by kicking your ass to the ground. I mean, you're almost twice my size, it would be such a shame for you. And don't forget, we are in a country that works on shaming people when they fail …"

Christian burst in laughter at the idea that this small tiny person could even think of putting him to the ground. He knew that she trained since she was a toddler, but … like she just mentioned, he was twice her size. Besides he knew that Ryan was now training with him to keep fit, not because he felt he could still teach him something.

Anastasia narrowed her eyes at him, trying to look angry, but her smile betrayed her, and after fighting it for a couple of more seconds, she too burst in laughter. The two of them shared this moment of simple and pure glee and only stopped laughing when the line moved a little bit forward. They stepped up, and in a natural impulse, Christian wrapped his arm around Anastasia's shoulders.

She immediately froze at the contact of his skin, and Christian retrieved his arm as suddenly as he put it there. None of them said a word about it, all their previous exhilaration gone in the blink of an eye as Christian was cursing himself from ruining this moment they shared. Even though they never agreed on anything, it was implicit between them that what was happening in the bedroom was for the bedroom only. If Christian were to define their relationship, it would be as casual, or as sex buddies, because he doubted they could even be called friends.

During the rest of the day, Christian questioned himself on whether this arrangement between them was a good idea or not. After all, at some point, they would have to come back to reality. No matter how much they both said that those two weeks in Japan were simply a fantasy for the two of them, the reality was still coming, and would soon knock them out into the real world. Maybe it would be for the best if they stopped this thing before it went further than any of them planned, or wanted.

And this was why, when they got back to their hotel and Anastasia asked Christian if he wanted to join her for her nap, Christian refused, claiming that he didn't need to sleep and that he would occupy himself otherwise. When he was in his room, Christian was tempted to call Jose for some advice, but stop himself from doing so, because he knew he couldn't tell his friend about everything that was going on in Tokyo.

Instead, he laid on his bed, closing his eyes as he purged his mind of any thoughts, only focusing on his breath, longly inspiring through his nose, and slowly exhaling through his mouth. It was a tactic that Jose had taught him long ago, to help him stop overthinking about everything, even if it was just for a minute, and after months and months of practice, it finally had on Christian the wanted effect.

Just when his mind was finally free of any thoughts, Christian's phone rang, making him frown before he took the call without opening his eyes. Which he did a fraction of second later, sitting up straight as he heard his boss's voice on the other end,

"Hello, Christian. How are you doing?"

"Fine, boss. Is everything alright?" Christian urgently asked, wondering why was Raymond calling when he said he would wait for news, instead of fishing for them. There was a small pause that made Christian worry, even more, wondering if something had happened while he was away.

"Everything is fine, Christian. I just wanted to know if Ana had shared her program with you concerning tomorrow."

"She wants to visit some district in Tokyo. Apparently, she wants to try a restaurant there."

"She wants to go to Ebisu?"

"Yes. I think that's the name," Christian said, wondering if Raymond was psychic, or if he knew his daughter that well to know exactly where his daughter would go, and when.

"I figured." There was something off about Raymond's voice, but Christian couldn't quite place it. And then it hit him. The tone Raymond just used was the same tone Anastasia used when she was talking about her Mom.

Christian took a deep breath, and crossed a line he never crossed before with his boss, "With all due respect, can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Raymond answered, though his voice was showing curiosity.

"Why am I the one here with your daughter?"

"We talked about it. Because you're my best man, and I completely trust you to take care of her."

"No, I mean. Why didn't _you_ come with her?" Christian specified, and his heart stopped beating during the whole time it took Raymond to answer. He knew he was crossing a line here, he knew he was talking about a part of Raymond's life that his boss never shared with him, but it still seemed to Christian that Raymond should be here with his daughter, telling her what kind of woman her mother was.

"Did she tell you about her mother?"

"Not really. She let slip a few things now and then, and I connected the dots," Christian eluded because he was certainly to not going to tell his crime lord of a boss, that his daughter and he had pillow talks, or that he did research on his dead wife.

"Tomorrow would be Carla's birthday if she were still alive, and she grew up in Ebisu, which is why Ana wants to go there," Raymond said with a voice that Christian would qualify as broken if he didn't know his boss better. He waited for a little, before insisting,

"Which leads back to my question, why didn't you come with her?"

Once again, there was a small silence before Raymond spoke again, "Did Ana asked you to ask me that?"

"Anastasia doesn't have any idea that I put any thoughts into it. I'm just asking because —"

"Then, we'll talk about it when you will get back. This is not a conversation I am inclined to have over the phone," Raymond stated with authority, making Christian forget all about crossing the line. If anything, he felt that he just sentenced himself to death, or at least to go back down on the hierarchy ladder he hardly climbed.

"Just make sure Clary doesn't get too drunk in the next couple of days. Unlike you, she doesn't say no to liquor, and last year was a terrible disaster for Jose."

And on those words, Raymond hung up, not even waiting for Christian to affirm his assignment; and Christian started to wonder if he went too far. He sat on his bed, thinking of how Raymond had never remarried, and that Christian had actually never seen another woman at his arm. He wondered if Raymond ever fully mourned his wife, which would explain why he wouldn't accompany his daughter to this trip.

But another part of Christian, the suspicious part of his mind wondered if Raymond wasn't responsible of his wife's death and if this wasn't the reason why he wouldn't talk about her to his daughter. After all, he did not attend the funeral, and there were very few mentions of the incident that killed her. Apparently, there wasn't even an investigation afterwards. And Christian knew how powerful Raymond was, and how influential he could be over the press, or even the police.

He was torn away from his speculations by someone knocking on his door. With a sigh, he got up, perfectly aware that it was Anastasia; and when he opened the door to reveal a brunette all dolled up and ready to party. She was wearing a short black skirt that was winded up all the way to her upper thighs, and a pale pink crop top that was doing a sort of 'X' on her chest with the fabric. She had let her dark hair loose, her chestnut curls falling in cascade on her shoulders and chest. Her blue eyes were circled by black, and her naturally red lips were painted with a dark red that was making her pulpous mouth stand even more than usual.

She frowned when she caught a glimpse of him, and told him with a little scowl obscuring her face, "You could at least pretend like you want to go, and change shirt."

"I lost track of time for a moment."

"Watching porn, again? I think I am going to have to be offended at some point if you keep taking care of your monster-cock by yourself instead of asking me to help," Anastasia said with a smirk on her lips as she unceremoniously entered his room.

She looked around, looking for something before striding to the wardrobe and opening it as if it was her own. "Do you intend on _dressing me up_?"

"You got that right. I'm not going clubbing with a guy who looks like he just walked out of a Nobel Prize Ceremony."

'What's wrong with a little brain?"

"I said _look_. You only _look_ like a Nobel Prize contester … or a very classy waiter. You pick."

Christian walked to her and stopped her from rummaging through the clothes he brought, as he told her, "I don't need a fashion designer. I need five minutes to slip into a pair of jeans and a random shirt."

"We'll never pass the door if you look average," She whined, letting herself fall backwards, on the bed. Christian glanced at her, appreciating the way her dress winded a little bit more up, and he picked random clothes as he told her,

"I never look average, even in prison jumpsuit, I still stand out."

"Well, of course, you'd stand out! Who doesn't stand out in that ugly orange? I miss the days of black and white. At least it wasn't sore to the eye."

Christian shook his head, taking off his current shirt and catching how Anastasia was not having any sort of decency, blatantly staring at him and eating him away with her bright blue eyes. He smirked, removing his trousers, and dressed in more club-fitting clothes as he told her,

"And anyway, I doubt the bouncer will look at me with you standing next to me dressed like that."

She beamed at his words, getting back up when she saw that he was already ready to go. Her eyes looked at him from head to toe, as if she was evaluating him; and then she said that they should get going, claiming that she was already late on being tipsy.

As Christian predicted, they did not have any trouble getting inside the club, though Christian wondered if it was because it wasn't in the culture to filter the entry of a club, or if it was because Anastasia was beyond hot in her outfit. As soon as they were in the club, Anastasia beelined to the bar, ordering a Margarita before she expectantly turned to Christian.

"I don't drink."

She narrowed her eyes at him, taking her drink once it was served to him, and already starting to gently sway to the music. Christian was sure that she was thinking that he wasn't drinking because he was on call, and that made him wonder if indeed he would have refused to drink, had he been drinking.

Once her drink was empty, Anastasia ordered a second one, asking for it to be drier and she went to look for a table. She found one that was rather far away from the dance floor, on the second floor; and they sat there, Christian looking everywhere around them as Anastasia was longingly looking at the dance floor.

"I guess you won't dance with me, either," She said, clearly annoyed with him, but Christian didn't answer anything, his eyes set on an illegal transaction that was occurring a few tables away. He had done enough of those to know when to spot something illegal going on.

He heard her sigh and get up, and from the moment she walked away from the table, Christian's eyes were solely on Anastasia. He followed from afar as she went downstairs, took a shot of clear alcohol and then entered the dance floor to bounce with the mass. No matter how many people there were around her, Christian never let the brunette out of his sight, and from what he could tell, she _loved_ to dance. She was clearly enjoying moving her hips to the sound of the music, and she wasn't feeling awkward by the surrounding crowd.

A few guys tried to dance with her, but all left after one song, probably because she was so lost in her world. Though it somehow bothered Christian to see guys with their hands all over her, he didn't dwell on it. Mostly because he knew that no matter what, he would be in her bed when they would leave the club. But that thought quickly faded away when he saw a blond guy dancing with her for more than a couple of songs.

At first, Christian didn't give many thoughts into the guy, but when Anastasia and he stopped dancing to get a drink, and then, resumed dancing, Christian examined the new up-comer with more attention. Unlike what he first thought, he wasn't a Japanese who had dyed his hair, he was an Occidental, and from the looks of it, he was a natural blond. He was taller than Anastasia (which wasn't difficult, to begin with) but definitely shorter than Christian. He was dressed like any other man in the club.

But his appearance wasn't what was troublesome to Christian. It was his presence in itself that bothered Christian. He had been that guy. The guy who dances with the girl for several songs, the guy who buys her drinks when she was thirsty, and the guy who ultimately ended up with the girl trashing in his bed as he pounded into her. And here came the problem. He didn't want Anastasia to bring that man to her bed.

He knew that all throughout the past week, Christian had been conflicted on whether their agreement was a good idea, or not; but seeing before his eyes the possibility of having to see her share her bed with someone else made him sure of one thing: he wanted to be the only one to enjoy her body beneath his. Even if it was only for the duration of one more week, it was his prerogative to have her only for him.

He knew that they never really discussed on their agreement. They never set boundaries or determined rules, but he still decided that exclusivity was a rule for him. He was trying to think of a way to split a couple of dancers, without having to pass for an ass, but nothing came to him. He knew he couldn't use Raymond's words of having Anastasia to go to bed alone, as it was working against him. He couldn't either go straight to them and break them apart because Anastasia would have his head for that.

But then, the blond man gave Christian the perfect opportunity to intervene. He tried to kiss Anastasia as any man would after a few drinks and a few torrid dances; but she stepped back, clearly avoiding his kiss. At first, he shrugged it off, dancing with her some more, but when he tried once again, Christian strode, all too happy to teach the guy some manners.

When he got to the couple, the guy was defending his case to Anastasia, saying with a British accent that she was giving all the signs, and so Christian imposingly placed himself behind the petite brunette as he enunciated with an ominous voice,

"I believe the lady said no."

"What is it to you? Get lost, we were having a conversation!" The guy responded without even glancing in Christian's direction, his eyes solely on Anastasia.

Christian smirked a little, putting himself between the stranger and Anastasia as he let the blond man know, "It is to me that we came together. So when you bother the lady, you bother me as well." As he said those words, he purposely played with his muscles, imposing his massive presence to the frail-looking guy.

"Now, if you want to insist, I might break several of your bones. So please, make my day, _insist_."

Christian watched the guy evaluate him, judging if he could win a fight against him, his eyes lingering on Christian's muscles, before he turned on his heels, doing his best to keep his head high as he did so. Christian looked at him with satisfaction as he disappeared through the crowd, though a part of him had hoped that the man would start a fight with him; and then he turned to Anastasia.

She was glaring at him, but Christian didn't let it bother him, as he told her with a very commanding voice, "We're leaving."

Unlike what he expected, Anastasia did not fight him on this and docilely followed him outside. Still, it was very clear from her attitude that she was annoyed with him. She did not address a single word to him in the cab, and only unleashed her anger when they were in her bedroom,

"You had _no rights_ to intervene!"

"Excuse me?" Christian asked dumbfounded, not sure of what he did wrong to make her so angry at him.

"I can handle a guy getting too touchy all on my own. I don't need _you_ hovering over me and plaguing me!"

"Well, in that case, next time, handle it better and faster. If you have to repeat yourself, it means that you weren't clear enough on what your intentions really were."

Anastasia widely opened her eyes, her face slowly turning to a shade of red before she put her hands on her hips as she vehemently defended herself,

"So if a guy doesn't understand the meaning of the word 'no', it is _my_ fault? It is _our_ fault if you guys never understand the first time around when we tell you something?"

"Don't try to turn this into something that it's not. It has nothing to do whether a guy listens to a girl but that I came to help you with a jerk," Christian imperially said, not willing to let Anastasia drag him on a feminist conversation that he was sure to lose. He wanted to get to the bottom of this and to know why she really was mad at him when he did nothing to deserve it.

"I don't need you, Christian! I don't need you to come and rescue me, whenever you see fit."

Christian opened his eyes as widely as she did before, trying to see a hint of logic in her words, but only seeing pure and utter nonsense. "You're mad at me because I helped you get rid of a guy?" He asked with utter shock.

"I don't need you," She repeated, before clarifying, "You're not my boyfriend. I don't _need_ you to help me get rid of guys."

For a moment, none of them said a single word, Christian looking down at Anastasia, who herself was looking down her shoes. Christian was torn between simply leaving because their argument was looking more like a couple-fight, than like two adults arguing; and shaking some sense into the girl, letting her know that sharing her bed at night should at least let him get rid of whatever annoying person who was trying to do the same.

Instead, he chose the thin line in the middle, "I know very well that I am not your boyfriend. I know very well that us having sex at night doesn't give me any rights concerning whom you see outside this bedroom. But that doesn't mean I have to like it.

Now, I didn't go after that guy because of our arrangement. In truth, I staid back longer than I should have, _because_ of our arrangement. I only went after that guy because he was off-limits. It could have been any other random girl in the club, I would have done the same. Sure, maybe with a little less pleasure into it, but I still would have gone after him.

That being said, if you want to be mad at me because I am not a jerk, so be it. I can't stop you, no matter how ridiculous it is. So, goodnight."

And on those words, he turned his heels on her, still seeing the shock on her face as he did so; and he walked to the door. As soon as his hand was on the handle, he heard her exclaim with dismay,

"We're in the middle of an argument, here!"

But he didn't give her the pleasure of prolonging it. He didn't see the point of staying in the same room and keep ranting at one another when it was obvious that none of them would change their opinion on how they felt.

When he was in his room, he went straight to the bathroom in order to take a cold shower; and, as he let the water droplets fall on his body, he couldn't help but be angry himself at this whole situation. He was angry that downsides of this arrangement between them were already showing their faces when it had been supposed to be a perfect two weeks until they would go back to the US soil.

In his mind, Christian had made a sort of peace with the fact that he was probably enjoying his last moments. Because even though Raymond didn't seem to know what was happening between his daughter and Christian, Christian still knew that as soon as Raymond would ask him if he had anything to report, Christian would come clean to his boss. He liked to think that his honesty would help him survive, but he wasn't giving too much hope into that.

When he finished showering, Christian simply put on his night trousers and laid on his bed, his gun secured under his pillow and he stared at the ceiling, wondering what tomorrow would be made off. Would Anastasia act as nothing happened, or would she keep bickering on what Christian considered as a closed topic? And if she pretended that nothing happened, would they resume where they went with their arrangement, or would that be off?

He was there, trying to predict all the possibilities that could come when someone knocked on his door. Christian suspiciously glanced at the clock wondering who it could be at this hour, knocking on his door in a foreign country. He highly doubted that it would be Anastasia, sure that the young brunette was still brooding in her room, ranting to herself about how much she hated him at this moment.

He took his gun from under his pillow, and after checking through the peephole, he let Anastasia in, doing his best to keep his surprise to himself. She entered the room, her eyes glancing at the gun in Christian's hand before she mumbled a very small, "I'm sorry."

Christian didn't say anything, even if he knew that propriety would want him to let the young girl know that she was forgiven. He looked at her wet hair messily falling around her face, her pink skin proof that her shower must have been boiling hot, her blue nightgown covering everything but her legs. Now that he was thinking about it, this was the first time that Christian saw her wearing a pyjama. Usually, she went to sleep either naked, either in her underwear.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you. I was just so angry at you because … well, you were being all professional back at the club, when we were supposed to have fun. And … I don't know I started thinking a lot of things when you intervened, and … well, I overreacted."

"Well, I shouldn't have walked out on you like that," Christian admitted, scratching the back of his head as his eyes couldn't tear themselves away from her. She made a small step toward him as she lifted her head up,

"So? You won't get all professional on me when we're outside, anymore?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that you can touch me in public, or have a drink with me, and even dance."

For a second, Christian was tempted to argue that she was the one who froze when he put his arm around her shoulder earlier during the day. But then again, maybe he shouldn't have been so quick to remove his arm either. Maybe she had just been surprised by his gesture, and he didn't give her enough time to properly react.

But instead of trying to justify what happened during the afternoon, he went on another direction, "I never drink, Anastasia. It has nothing to do with you. I just simply never took a single drop of alcohol in my life."

"Never?"

Christian shook his head whilst Anastasia was looking at him as if he was an alien. "Not even on a cake?" Once again, Christian shook his head, and she tried to find a flaw in his reasoning, "You _never_ had tiramisu?"

"I'm not really into sweet food, to begin with."

"Life in your shoes must be boring. You don't drink, you don't take sugar …"

"Maybe. But I have other fields to play in," He told her, closing the distance between them, and making her chuckle against his chest.

He kissed her, cupping her face with one of his hand as he directed them to the bed. Once he had Anastasia laying on her back, he slowly peeled her out of her clothes, his eyes never losing contact with her blue sapphires. He watched her as he brought her to her orgasm and he revelled as she became undone beneath his fingers.

He loved how her pupils dilated when she was reaching cloud nine, how her breath would catch in her throat, how she would arch her body, whilst all her insides would tense for him. He loved watching her climax, especially since he was the source of her pleasure.

He was alining himself to her entrance, having rolled a condom on as she was coming down her high (since they had to buy another pack of protection); but when he was about to thrust in her, Anastasia stopped him, asking, "Christian, please. I want to be on top."

Her voice was so sweet at that right moment that she could have asked him anything else, he would have done it for her. So he turned and helped her get comfortable on top of him. She laid on top of him, their bodies horizontal to the bed, and Christian gently thrust upward to make his pelvic bone meet with her clit. He knew that this was her favourite position, that her orgasms were never as powerful as when she was in that exact position, riding him, even though she was more laying on top of him than sitting.

Usually, when they were in this position, Christian would still try to have a little control by grabbing her hair, or spanking her a little; but this night he didn't. Even though he had learnt over the past week that Anastasia was one of those girls who liked when sex was a bit rough, he still didn't try to take control, and she didn't try to speed the moment.

They simply shared this sweet carnal moment, each slowly bringing the other to their climax.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So this was a chapter with A LOT OF HINTS. I know it doesn't seem so, but it is so, I promise. But see, once again, I didn't put any cliffhanger.**

💚** Also, I want to make a few things clear, Elena is married to Eamon Kavanagh in this story and not Eric Lincoln, because … well, she is a recurring character in the story, and I want her as such. So she is Kate's and Ethan's birth mother, roll with me. And Jake is an imaginary brother, haha. Well, he exists in their world, but that's it.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of the evolution of their relationship? Do you think they will be able to keep it normal when they will get back? Did you notice the change in the last few paragraphs?**

💚**What do you think of Raymond so far? Are you suspicious, like Christian? I know he wasn't present in this chapter, but I still want to know what you thought about him.**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Haha, well so far, we just know what Christian knows, meaning that his life is hanging on a thread, haha_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	8. Chapter 7: Ebisu

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 7****: Ebisu (4,8K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian woke up, Anastasia was still sleeping soundly against him, which didn't come as a surprise to Christian. The sun was barely up, and Anastasia was one of those people who liked to sleep in, in the morning. Actually, except for their first day in Tokyo when she tried to sneak out on him, Christian never saw Anastasia wake earlier than ten in the morning. But he was far from complaining since it gave him time to exercise a little. He never did something as crazy as to go for a jog (never knowing if she would use the opportunity to sneak out), but he did his usual warm-ups of pushups and abs, which of course Anastasia thought was crazy because to her, vacations meant leisure.

Still, Christian had taken the habit of watching Anastasia sleep whenever he woke up next to her. He didn't really know why, but he knew that he liked those five to ten minutes he got to see of her completely peaceful and sleeping, her chestnut hair spread all over the pillows. He was sure that if he had been good at drawing, he would have been able to recreate Anastasia's face to perfection. Down to the smallest details, like how well sculpted the curve of her cupid bow was, of how many freckles were hiding on her face -and not noticeable at first glance-, or even how her long and thick lashes would create beautiful shadows on her high cheekbones.

As he'd done every morning for more than a week, Christian repressed his instincts to lean down and kiss his sweet, sleeping Anastasia and instead, decided to do his morning exercises. Though this time, he went to her room, instead of his own -so he wouldn't wake her-, taking with him his gun, clothes, and laptop. For an hour, he exercised, wishing all along he could be back in the US and use the gym for he could feel his muscles going numb from the lack of proper activity. Then, after a quick cold shower, Christian opened his laptop and scrolled through the internet, looking for one particular piece of information. He was almost tempted to call Luke to rescue him, but given who this information was regarding, he knew that asking Raphael for help would bring more problems than solutions.

After almost an hour of looking through several meaningless articles, Christian finally found what he was looking for, and was writing it down on a piece of paper just as someone knocked on the door. With a small smile lingering on his lips, Christian walked to open the door for Anastasia, sure that she was over-thinking the fact that he didn't come back to her like he did every morning after exercising; and without any surprise, he found the petite brunette on the other side of the door.

She had obviously just woken up, her hair still a mess from sleep and sex, her face rumpled with marks of her pillow here and there, and her nightgown all rumpled as well (though Christian wondered how it could be since he disregarded the piece of clothing pretty early during the night). She sleepily smiled to him, before asking him, with the hoarse voice that Christian loved so much on her,

"Having second thoughts?"

He shook his head, a smirk growing on his lips without him able to stop it, and he let the young brunette step into her own room as he told her, "No. I was just watching porn. You know me."

He watched her glance at the laptop closed on the bed before she shook her head, sleep finally fading away from her features. "That insatiable monster-cock of yours, what are we going to do about it?"

The two of them laughed before Christian let the girl know that he would let her take her shower in peace. He went to his room to put his laptop back in place and then went back to Anastasia's room, waiting for her to finish her shower. When she did come back from the bathroom, steam trailed behind her and her body was tightly wrapped in a white towel.

Anastasia smiled at him when she saw that he had come back to her room, and she turned her back to him, her long chestnut hair swinging across her back as she rummaged through her wardrobe. Christian's eyes never left her, and given the way she was moving her body, he was sure that she was perfectly aware. He let his eyes wander all over her skin, a part of him liking it better when it was porcelain white rather than the hot pink it was at that moment.

"I don't know how you can take showers so hot," Christian said, sitting on the bed to let her get dressed and speaking without really thinking. He was mostly voicing a fact that he observed about the brunette. Every time she came out of the shower, either steam would follow her or her skin would be pink, almost to the point of being red.

Anastasia raised an eyebrow at him, a mocking smile spreading across her lips as she told him, "So, does that mean that we will never get hot shower sex?"

Christian chuckled, shaking his head, slightly. "I think we already established that hot sex is already a thing between us. Now, I don't think my _monster-cock _will be able to survive the hot shower part."

"I think your monster-cock would actually thank me for saving it from the reduction you impose upon it every time you take one of those icy showers."

Christian didn't have a response to that, recalling the high pitched scream she'd let out a few days ago when she had the misfortune of going in the shower after him, and not taking the time to adjust properly to the water temperature. He watched her slip into her underwear with that secret way girls seemed to have, that allowed them to be able to dress with an audience without having to be completely naked.

He let his eyes linger a moment longer on the curves of her back, appreciating how firm they seemed to be, and knowing that they were, indeed. She was vigorously rubbing her hair in a towel when he broke out of his trance and asked her,

"What are your plans for today?"

"As I said, I mostly want to go to that restaurant I told you about. But we don't have to be there at noon o'clock …" She explained to him, straddling his lap with a luxurious smile.

Christian's hands automatically held her in place, holding her by the curves he liked the most on her with his eyes steady on her face. It was obvious in her blue eyes that she was looking to have something lustful and carnal right at that moment, but Christian couldn't. He was bothered by the fact that she didn't open up to him concerning her real intentions today. It wasn't like he had ever been an ass when she told him something about her mother. On the contrary, he listened and never judged, no matter what she said or felt.

"Would you mind if we go somewhere not far from there, afterwards?" He asked, and he saw surprise in her eyes. He couldn't blame her, for all she knew; he couldn't speak a word of Japanese and knew nothing about the country they were in. Which was far from the truth, but he didn't bother pointing that out to her.

She barely thought about it, before smiling again at him and letting him know that she didn't mind. Then, she took his hands in her own, removing them from her being as her deep blue eyes stayed steady on his grey ones, and slowly, she made his fingers brush their way up to her breasts. Christian smirked at her, squeezing a bit where she had just lead his hands to, before leaning in to nibble her earlobe whilst letting her know,

"You know, I'm not really a boob kind of guy." Then he trailed his hands back to their former place and added as he firmly grabbed her buttocks, "I like better what you have here."

Anastasia giggled at those words, hiding her face in the crook of his neck, making Christian smile, the thought occurring to him that he very much liked that sound. Then, he rolled them both to the bed, his desire for the brunette suddenly growing in him, and said, "Let's give you an excuse to take another scorching hot shower…"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

After their morning amusements, Christian and Anastasia went to Ebisu, walking around in the Yebisu Garden Place until Anastasia finally found the restaurant she had been looking for. The first thought that occurred to Christian was that he never thought that Anastasia would willingly go into that particular restaurant during her trip in Japan when all she ever wanted since she got to the country was to blend in as much as possible.

The restaurant was anything but Japanese and anything but discreet. It was designed as an old European castle, lost in the middle of Japan and clashing with the places Anastasia had been going to during the past week. The name of the place was Château de Joël Robuchon, and if Christian could tell anything about that fact, was that he was about to be served French food.

He also understood why Anastasia insisted on him wearing his usual outfit for once and why she was so temptingly delicious next to him. The restaurant she was taking them to was nothing like the ones she took them to over the past week. It was fancy, and Christian wouldn't be surprised if a dress code was in order. Still, he didn't mind, because it allowed him to appreciate the sight of Anastasia wearing a little black dress that went all the way down to her knees (well just above), with high heels that made her head come just below his chin. Her attire was rather simple, especially knowing that the girl liked to dress up, but it was still eye candy to Christian, and he clearly wouldn't mind if she decided to dress like that every day.

They did not spend that much time in the restaurant, only eating in a rather peaceful silence. Christian wondered why she had chosen this place amongst all the other restaurants that they'd passed by to get there, though his instincts were telling him that this place was connected to her mother in some way. He pondered on the fact that maybe this was a place Valentine took his late wife to but never asked Anastasia about it.

Actually, the more their time at the restaurant passed, the more he wondered if what he had planned was such a good idea. After all, Anastasia didn't really open up to him when it came to her mother, and maybe this was a part of her life that she would rather keep to herself, or at least not share with him.

When they left the restaurant, Christian was feeling anything but confident towards his plans; and he was thinking of a way to abort it when she asked him where he wanted to take her. It wasn't much the question that gave Christian the strength to go on, but her smile. There was something about it that made him feel … lighter.

So Christian made them walk through Ebisu, all the way until they changed districts and went back into Shibuya, asking several times if she could handle the walk with her high heels. She dismissed him, saying that he had seen nothing of what she could walk in heels. Still, she seemed surprised that Christian knew exactly where he was going, and that he was not lost without her being his 'tour guide'.

***** They walked for a long moment until Christian stopped in front of the International School of the Sacred Hearts. He felt Anastasia look at him questioningly, but he did not say a word and simply pressed his hand on her smaller back as they walked into the school. At the end of the corridor was the honorary hall, and Anastasia abruptly froze when she caught glimpse of a picture. *****

*** (So, I know that it is impossible nowadays to walk into a school as if nothing to go look at some picture. But guess what? This is a work of fiction, and I didn't want to go through the hassle of having Christian ask for permissions and all. Let's just roll with it, and since this passage takes place during the Japanese school break, it is perfect. Just close the eyes of your reasoning voice, and if that voice can't see anything, it can complain about anything. Haha) ***

Christian took a step back to give Anastasia space she probably needed, and he watched the brunette walk to the picture of her mother, her eyes mesmerized by the photo. She raised her hand to the frame, her finger following the legend beneath the picture before she looked back at the portrait of her mother, whispering mostly to herself,

"_She was so beautiful_."

At those words, Christian took a look at the picture and saw a young Carla Wilks. She was probably younger than her daughter was now, since this picture had been taken when she was in high school. But … Christian did not agree with Anastasia. He thought that Carla was simply pretty. He wouldn't have used the word beautiful to describe her. Sure, she was far from ugly, and she was more than pretty, but Christian thought that Anastasia was more beautiful.

He compared the two brunettes and had to admit that, at first glance, one would think that they were twins. But when he paid attention to the picture, he noticed the difference that made him think that Anastasia was more of a beauty compared to her mother. Carla's nose was longer than her daughter's and failed to have the faint freckles that Christian loved to count in the morning. Anastasia's face had more the shape of a heart, whereas Carla's was more rounded. And whilst Carla had thin lines for lips, Anastasia's were pulpous and red and begging to be kissed at any given moment. But what Christian thought was the most striking difference was their eyes.

Up until this day, he had never found a feature of Raymond in the brunette. They were the polar opposite. But now, he could say without a doubt that, even though Anastasia had inherited her mother's blue eyes, the shape of her eyes belonged to Raymond. The way they were slightly shaped like an almond, or even the distance between their eyes and their nose, it was Raymond all over Anastasia's face. And even knowing that she shared her eyes with her father, Christian's favourite feature on Anastasia still remained her beautiful eyes. They were actually part of the reason why he thought that she was more beautiful than her mother.

Of course, Christian kept those thoughts to himself, not wanting to upset the brunette by giving his personal opinion on something he had no business of judging in the first place. But his concerns quickly went in another direction when Anastasia burst in tears, bringing her hands up to hide her face in them.

"_Shit_!" Christian exclaimed, suddenly feeling useless and uncomfortable. "I didn't bring you here to make you cry. I don't know … I just thought that you'd —"

"I do. It was a lovely thought, Christian."

Still, that didn't stop her from crying, and after a few seconds of watching her silently sob, Christian took the brunette in his arms, letting her cry on his chest. For a long moment, they remained like that, until it seemed that Anastasia had no more tears to shed; and when she was reigning over her emotions again, she weakly smiled at Christian,

"Thank you. Do you mind if we leave now?"

"Sure."

He watched her glance one more time at her mother's portrait, and his instincts made him ask, "Do you want a picture with her?"

Anastasia blinked several times as if she was processing the idea in her brain before she smiled brightly at Christian and nodded before standing against the wall next to the picture. Christian snapped several pictures with his phone and sent them to Anastasia on her device as they walked out of the building.

Once they were back on the main street, Christian hailed the first cab he saw and told the driver to go back to the hotel. He was feeling bad for depressing Anastasia when he had only meant to give her something from her past, but he still saw the surprise in her eyes when he spoke to the driver in Japanese.

During the whole duration of their trip, Christian had let Anastasia do all the talking when they were addressing a Japanese person because she was far better than him in that language. He knew a few bribes of Japanese, mostly related to his line of business, so he didn't mind that the brunette took the lead during the trip. Especially because of one key element: though he could somewhat speak Japanese, he could not read it for the life of him.

As the cab was driving the short way between their location and their hotel, Anastasia slipped her hand in Christian's, making him turn his head and look at her. "How did you know it was her birthday?"

"I just put two and two together. You know, I listen when you talk," He half lied. He did listen to everything she would tell him, even when she would marvel at the good grades the youngest Kavanagh would get in school, or when she would rant because she didn't get to buy the pair of shoes she wanted. But the truth that he slightly altered was that it was Raymond who gave him that crucial information concerning the importance of the day. Though, Christian doubted Raymond would approve of Christian being so close to his daughter right now.

Anastasia smiled playfully as she pointed out to him, "You'd be the first guy in history who's not gay and who listens when a girl talks."

Christian shook his head as they left the cab, but Anastasia pulled his hand when he started walking to the hotel, and so they walked around the busy streets. For a moment, they remained silent, simply strolling, Anastasia's hand never having let go of Christian's; and after a while, she started opening up to him,

"You know, I always felt like … I was missing a part of her. My Mom. Because Dad never wants to talk about her. He doesn't have any pictures of her at home, he never mentions her, and he never spends the day with me on her death anniversary. And … well, I don't feel like asking my grandparents about her. I don't want to be insensitive to them. I mean …"

"It's hard to bury a child, I get it," Christian finished for her, and she nodded.

"So I only had Mike and Eric to tell me about her. When I started forgetting her, I panicked, and Mike always told me that I simply needed to look in the mirror to remember her. I get what he meant, now. And Eric … he was the one who told me the most about her.

He never told me how they met, but he told me that when my Dad saw my Mom, it was love at first sight. That she was a very loving and compassionate person, that she was very selfless. She was into so many charities, helping every cause that could be helped.

After high school, she didn't go to college, she experienced life. She travelled the world on her own, doing small jobs all over the world, and helping the best she could. She used to be a waitress, a stewardess; she worked in a circus and in libraries. She helped build wells in Africa, and she fought in Asia to stop child slavery. She wanted to make the world a better place, and … I wish I were more like her, instead of being the spoiled brat of a rich and powerful man."

"You know, it is your choice to make your life your own. You just need to adjust to what life has given you. If you want to make the world a better place, do it, and don't compare yourself to how your mother did it. Instead, think of how you can do it better."

They had stopped walking; sitting on a little bench in a park, and Anastasia looked up at Christian, processing what he'd just told her. She seemed to think about it for a moment before she smiled, and asked him,

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"What about your parents? I bet your parents are really tall, just like you. And I'm sure that you were a hassle as a kid. But I'm sure that your moth—"

"I don't know any of that, Anastasia. My parents died a long time ago," He eluded, not eager to speak about his parents. It wasn't much of a lie to him, because they were dead in his heart. He knew that if he had the misfortune of running into one of them, it would be as if they were any other given person. But he didn't feel like sharing that with Anastasia at the moment.

She didn't retort anything, and Christian was grateful about that for he didn't want her pity, or the useless words of sympathy people usually had for him. He also appreciated the fact that she didn't try to push further into their conversation, and just let it go. Instead, she got up and walked straight to the power line in front of them on which there was a poster.

"Well, tonight we're going to a parade," She brightly smiled, her tone clearly indicating to Christian that she was not giving him any choice on the matter. But it wasn't her tone that made Christian give in, it was the face she had. That particular face she made that made Christian feel like he could go to jail because of that face because he couldn't see himself refusing her anything when she was making _that _face.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

When Christian woke up that morning, a sense of loss rushed through him. It was the last day of their trip to Japan, and Christian had this nagging feeling growing in his stomach. He was not going to lie to himself and pretend that he didn't know what it was about, he knew very well that a part of him wished that he and Anastasia didn't have to leave Japan yet, and go back to reality. Especially when he knew that the reality he would have to go back to wouldn't have an Anastasia to share his bed with.

With a small heave, Christian rolled onto his side to admire Anastasia's face, brushing her hair away from her soft cheek. This was probably the thing he was going to miss the most, waking up with her by his side. He loved those few minutes he got to look at her peacefully sleeping in his arms.

As he was gently tracing lines on her face, Christian recalled how Anastasia chickened out the day before when he took her to a tattoo parlour. During the whole past two weeks, she had been beaming at the idea of getting tattooed, and when the time came, she told Christian that she wasn't feeling up to it after all, that she will do it some other time. To which Christian said nothing, though he was genuinely amused by her.

Actually, Christian had to admit to himself that over the past two weeks, he had learnt to like Anastasia like he would like any other friend. She was more than a mission, and he wondered what he would miss the most about her. Would it be the sex or the person she was? He liked how she was so different than him, carefree, acting on her first impulses. He liked when she smiled at him, her eyes sparkled with mirth. He liked that she was never afraid to speak her mind, especially when she was having a smart mouth with him.

He was about to kiss her forehead like he did every morning before going to his room to exercise, when he thought better of it, and kissed her neck instead, closing the small gap that there was between them. She stirred a little, but did not awaken, which made Christian sneak his hand on her body, all the way down to her thighs. She moaned when his fingers touched her sweet little nub, and Christian sucked on her neck.

Anastasia shivered under his touch, her eyes still closed as she craned her neck to give Christian better access whilst arching her body, asking for him to touch her more. Christian stilled, caressing her face with his free hand and he demanded, "Open your eyes for me, Anastasia. Or I am going to stop all at once."

She opened her eyes at once before crashing her lips onto his and bringing her hands to his hair to weave her fingers into it. Christian loved when she tugged on his hair, especially when they were kissing. With urgency, he slipped two fingers inside of her, grunting in her ear when he felt her so wet. Anastasia moaned even louder when he started rubbing her sweet little spot, saying his name in a delectable whisper as she closed her eyes.

With brusqueness, Christian made her roll so she was on her stomach, and after swiftly rolling a condom on his member, he impaled her from behind. She screamed out in pleasure when he fully filled her, throwing her head back, and Christian wrapped his fingers around her neck, putting a slight pressure there, making the brunette beneath him gasp in delight.

He felt her walls tighten around his member, making him wish that they could have more time so he could play longer with her. But since they didn't, Christian increased his pace, making Anastasia squeak out, "_God, Christian_! Just right _there_!"

Christian thrust in her harder and faster, his fingers contracting a bit more around Anastasia's fragile neck, but she seemed to not mind at all. Faster than he anticipated, Christian found his peak, bringing Anastasia with him with each of his last thrusts before letting himself fall next to her, both of their bodies glistening with sweat.

"This was the best morning call I ever had. If you had woken me like that every morning, I wouldn't have minded doing some exercise with you," Anastasia said, still a little out of breath. Christian shook his head, before retrieving himself and kissing her swiftly on the lips as he told her,

"This isn't the kind of exercise I had in mind. And I highly hope it is not the kind of exercise you have with Ryan."

He got up to throw the condom in the bin, and Anastasia sat up, a blissful smile lingering on her lips. Christian put a knee on the bed to caress her face as he let her know, "And for the record, this was the best quickie I ever had."

Anastasia giggled, making Christian wish he could always make her giggle like that, and she took his hand away from her face to keep it in her smaller one. She looked at Christian for a moment, apparently ready to tell him something, but when she said nothing, Christian told her, "I better get to my room to have a shower. I can't decently take the plane smelling of sex. No matter how much I like having the smell of you on to me."

Anastasia shook her head, though Christian could see a slight frown on her forehead. He did not comment on it, simply slipping back into his clothes and leaving the brunette alone to take her own shower as he let her know,

"Yes, I still have no intention of getting scorched by water."

When he was back to his room, Christian did his best to not think of how the knot in his belly grew more and more as he prepared to go back to the US; and just when he was about to hop in his shower, his phone rang, making his insides freeze.

He knew very well who was calling him. Over the past week, Raymond only called once to know how Anastasia handled the birthday of her mother. Christian had texted him a few times to let him know that everything was alright, but Raymond never called again, so why was he calling now?

At the second ring, Christian picked up, "Listening."

"We need to talk, Christian."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So this was a chapter with A LOT OF HINTS, once again. One of them is so important that if you know which one I am talking about, you will get a preview**😉**. I know it doesn't seem so, but it is so, I promise. I know, I put a cliffhanger this time, but it's a small one ... or is it?**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of the gesture Christian had for Ana?**

💚**What do you think of what we learned about Carla and all the people implicated with her?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Mar****: **_Well, Christian's parents are an interesting question, but I can't answer without spoiling. Just keep it in mind for a while. Hihi. And though Elliott and Mia are in the story, they are not as Christian's siblings. Not related AT ALL to the man. You shall see why..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	9. Chapter 8: Okinawa

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

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**Chapter 8****: Okinawa (6,4K)**

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**~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

"We need to talk, Christian."

For a brief second, Christian froze on himself, his breath catching in his throat at the seriousness behind his boss's tone. Of course, Raymond could be calling him for various reasons, but Christian didn't like that he was calling him mere moments before he and Anastasia were supposed to head to the airport.

With suspicion, Christian secured his gun in its holster and checked through his peephole if there was anyone at his doorstep. He didn't doubt that Raymond could send some of his men to pick up his daughter and kill him in the process. But when he saw that the corridor was clear, he relaxed a little, trying to rationalize with himself a little. After all, just because he was planning on coming clear to his boss, that didn't mean that Raymond already knew what was happening between him and Anastasia.

"Can't it wait a few hours until I get back?"

"Not really. Well, it depends on you," Raymond shrewdly said, making Christian even more nervous. For all the years he had worked with the man, Raymond had never eluded the words he wanted to say. He had always been direct, probably because he was a man of power who had learnt to impose his will just by his words and the strength of his voice.

When Christian didn't say a word, waiting for Raymond to continue, the mobster explained, "Ana wants to stay a week more in Japan; she called me yesterday to let me know that she wants to go to Okinawa."

As the words processed in his brain, the first feeling that came to him was confusion. He couldn't understand why the brunette hadn't talked to him about this change of plans in the morning or even the night before. He never actually stopped her from doing anything, even when he knew that any other man of Raymond would have tried to put a veto on her whereabouts. He simply let her be, simply tagging along, without ever nagging her about it (even when it came down to shopping). So he simply couldn't understand why she felt like she had to go behind his back and ask her father about this without letting him know about it.

"I won't ask you to stay if you don't want to, Christian. I know this "mission" isn't what you had in mind when I told you that I was sending you to Japan. If you made plans, or if you simply don't want to stay there longer, I would understand, and have you both back as planned," Raymond said when Christian didn't give him an answer.

Christian sat on his bed, a new feeling growing in his stomach that had nothing to do with anxiety or nervousness. He was angry. But the thing was, he couldn't really tell if he was angry at Anastasia for going behind his back and therefore, treating him with as much respect as she would give a rat; or if he was angry at himself for believing that this arrangement they had between them would imply that she would actually give him a little more respect outside the bedroom.

He hung his head low, pinching the bridge of his nose as he realized how pathetic this whole situation was. Just a few moments ago, he was there, looking at the girl and wishing that those two weeks they shared would never end, when all along, she only saw him as a boy toy. This was the only justification he could find as to why she didn't discuss her change of plans with him. His opinion in the matter didn't matter to her.

"Christian?" Raymond pressed on the other end of the phone, bringing the young man back to the reality of the moment. He clenched his jaw, wishing that someone would suddenly barge in on Raymond with an emergency that would require Christian back to US soil. But when nothing of the sort happened, Christian said with his most neutral voice,

"I have no say in the matter."

Raymond sighed from the end of the line, before he specified, "I know that whatever I'll say, you will do as asked. But here, I am not ordering you anything. I am asking for your opinion. If you want to come back, I will let Ana know that Okinawa will have to wait for another time."

"I will go wherever you send me, Raymond. You didn't have to call me for that," Christian argued, his voice still neutral, and something in Raymond's breathing told him that the man was frustrated with this answer.

For a couple of seconds, neither men said a word, before Raymond sighed in what Christian categorized as defeat, and let the copper-haired man know, "I will see you in a week."

Christian hung up and went straight to his shower. He had always been someone who took quick showers, mostly because in many of the foster homes he had been to, his foster parents had nagged him about the price of water, and heat, which was why his showers were now always cold. All his life up until his twelfth birthday, he had heard adults blaming him for taking showers that would last more than five minutes, and how he shouldn't use too much hot water and think of other people in the house. And even though he had fled those places more than a decade ago, the habit of a quick and cold shower stuck with him.

But when Christian stepped inside the shower that day, he was so engulfed in his thoughts that he didn't realize how long he'd stayed under the water. He kept on thinking about the fact that this simple little thing that was prolonging her holiday, Anastasia didn't decide to share this information with him. And the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he _was_ really angry at her. How could she even make the plan, and then pretend as if it was nothing the whole time they spent together afterwards?

It was only when he realized that he was shivering because of the cold, and not anger, that Christian left the shower, his skin all pruned up and white. With haste, he finished packing his bags, doing his best to calm himself and contain his anger. This was something that he was actually very good at, concealing his emotions, but only when people were around. As soon as he was alone, he would be on fire. The only person who actually saw a glimpse of him enraged was Jose. But then again, Jose was his best friend, and Christian felt a little freer around him than with other people.

Once he was ready, he headed to the lobby and called a cab whilst waiting for the brunette. Five minutes later, she came out of the elevator followed by a valet handling all her suitcases, and she smiled brightly at him. But he didn't return her smile, simply taking his bag and walking straight to the taxi, cursing himself for being so impacted by this woman.

He had no reason to be. Their arrangement was very clear. They had two weeks of fun that they would qualify as a hazy dream when they returned back to the US. There was nothing more to it. He knew that from the beginning, and not even for a second, had he forgotten about it. So he had no reason to feel betrayed by her move. She could do whatever she wanted; it shouldn't have impacted him that she didn't share her plans with him. He actually knew for a fact that it wouldn't have impacted him if the arrangement hadn't been thrown in the mix.

During the ride to the airport, he sat next to the driver, though his eyes did peek on their own through the rearview mirror to look at the brunette. For most of the ride, she looked through the window, a sad expression clouding her face. And no matter how angry he was at her, he didn't like seeing her like that. He liked it better when she smiled, and giggled, and made fun of him.

For the rest of the journey, neither of them said a single word, just like when they came to Japan, though Christian did see that from time to time, Anastasia would glance in his direction. But he never brought up the topic that was upsetting him. He wanted her to acknowledge the fact that she went behind his back, but he also didn't want to show that this little manoeuvre of hers was affecting him more than it should have.

He closed his eyes once the plane took off, pretending to be asleep, even though all of his senses were on alert during the whole flight. And during the whole duration of the flight, he couldn't tell if he was so aware of his environment because of the mission that had been entrusted to him, or if it was because Anastasia was sitting next to him. But no matter what, he didn't let it show, and kept his features expressionless.

It was only in the cab-drive from the airport to a house Raymond had rented by the beach, that Anastasia finally broke the ice between them. Unlike in the first cab ride, Christian had taken his seat next to her, mostly because he didn't want to see her sad face again. She tried to take his hand in hers, but he stopped her from doing so by abruptly putting his hand on his lap.

"Are you angry at me?" She asked in a small voice, but Christian kept his face towards the window, refusing to look in her direction.

"What did I do to make you mad like this?"

"You went behind my back!" He all but barked at her, making the driver worriedly glance at them in the review mirror. Christian locked his jaw, his eyes hard on the girl. She looked down at her hands, fidgeting with her fingers.

"I'm sorry … I … I wanted to tell you this morning, but … "

"But you went behind my back and asked Daddy dearest to break the news for you."

Anastasia didn't retort with her usual wit, nor did she glare at him, she simply looked down, hiding her face and emotions away from Christian, and unknowingly, bothering him more than the fact that she went behind his back,

"I'm sorry. I just … I was afraid you wouldn't want to stay another week, and I didn't want you to say no to my face," She whispered, taking Christian aback. He had never bothered to see it from her point-of-view.

"You thought that I would refuse to stay a week longer with you?" Christian asked in disbelief.

"I don't know, Christian. I never know what you think. You always keep everything to yourself, and … well, it's not easy to read you," She snapped, finally looking back to him. Christian saw a hint of defiance in her blue eyes as if she was daring him to contradict her words.

They stared at one another for a moment, before she shyly reached out for his hand, clearly fearing that he would refuse her that once more. But when he didn't, she squeezed it and said, "I didn't mean for you to think that I was going behind your back. I'm sorry."

Christian squeezed her hand back. "Just … don't _ever_ do it again. I don't react well to people going behind my back."

Just as they came to an understanding, the cab driver pulled in front of a house nearby the beach, and Christian repressed himself from rolling his eyes. For as long as he had known the man, Raymond seemed to like his space. Whether it was his mansion or the hotel rooms he would use whilst on business trips, Raymond always went for spacious places.

And the house he had rented for his daughter was no different. It was a two-story house, large enough for a big family when there would only be Anastasia and Christian. But the brunette didn't seem to mind (though having lived all of her life like this, she was probably used to it), and she went inside the house as if it was her own. Christian followed her, helped by the driver with all of her suitcases.

Once inside, Christian saw that his expectations of the place were founded, it was ridiculously spacious for only two people. He left the cases in the entryway and followed the noises coming from what happened to be the kitchen. There, he found Anastasia reading a paper and drinking a glass of water.

She looked up to him when he cleared his throat, and she smiled brightly at him. He raised an eyebrow, pointing at the paper that was in her hands, questioningly. So she explained:

"Oh. It's only the instructions from the owners of this place: where the fuse box is, where to shut down the water and gas, where the nearest shops are, etc."

"So in the case of a gas leak, I will have to count on you to shut down—"

"You will have to count on yourself. I'm a rich spoiled brat, remember? I barely know where the sink is," She cut him off, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Christian didn't renounce on that, though he made a mental note to look at the paper when she was looking the other way, and find all of the important places that were mentioned there while she was sleeping.

"So? We're good? You're no longer mad at me?" She asked, putting down the paper and the glass. Christian shook his head, a small smile growing on his lips despite himself. No matter how angry he had been at her, this was how he liked her best: teasing, joking, and carefree.

"So, if you're no longer mad, why are you all the way over there? I mean, I'm no longer a bad girl that needs to be scolded," She continued, her voice far more alluring now. He didn't say anything, letting her lead the path as she swayed her way over to him; and when she finally reached him, she smiled deviously up at him, putting her hands behind his neck as she said,

"Except, if you think that you should punish me … Then, in that case, I have been a very, _very_ naughty girl."

"Naughty girls don't get sex. They get abstinence."

"Then I'm a good girl. I'm a good girl," She quickly countered, making Christian laugh at her.

"You just can't make up your mind, can you?"

But still, that didn't stop him from kissing her and taking her all the way to the countertop. She weaved her fingers through his hair, bringing his face ever closer to hers whilst Christian was lifting her skirt up, in search for her sweet spot. Once he found it, he moved her underwear to the side in an impatient gesture, and massaged her pleasure spot, earning a guttural moan from her.

He kept on fondling her, his mouth quickly making its way to her chest and its wonders, and when he judged that she was wet enough, he reached back to her lips, asking her between two kisses, "Tell me, Anastasia. Have you been good or naughty? Shall I punish you, or reward you?"

"Bad. I've been so, so bad," She panted, moving her hips to get even more friction from Christian's fingers.

Christian smirked, removing his fingers and making the brunette pout. She watched him roll a condom on, a little remark about his member ready to escape her lips but never doing so. Softly, he reached to cup her face and kiss her, but when he felt her taking him in her hand to take him in, Christian stopped her and made her come down the counter. Then he turned her around, and gently thrust into her until she was enveloping his entire length.

He let out a grunt of satisfaction, relishing, once again, in the fact that she felt so perfect around him, and that he didn't have to hold back with her. He rammed into her, repeatedly, drawing happy squeaks out of her; and when he felt her inner walls squeeze him tighter and tighter, he smacked her rear, growling between thrusts,

"Come on, Anastasia. Just come for me."

And as his hand connected once again against the soft skin of her behind, she let out a chaplet of 'yes's and swears. Christian swiftly followed, heaving out a satisfied sigh before he bent a little to kiss the skin of her neck.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

The next day, Christian and Anastasia stayed mostly in the house, going out only to shop for a few groceries. At some point, she had wanted to go out to eat, but Christian had surprised her by cooking brunch for the two of them, which resulted in a lot of mockery from Anastasia's part, saying that without his 'monster-cock', he would be the perfect man. Of course, Christian had a comeback about that, saying that this particularity of his anatomy was exactly what was making him the perfect man.

But during their little grocery shopping, Anastasia saw something that she couldn't stop talking about.

"So? We're going to that karaoke beach, right?"

Christian smirked, not giving her a straight answer just like he had been doing for the past hour ever since they'd gotten back. She pouted, clearly not happy at his lack of involvement in the conversation and she pointed out,

"We _have _to go, anyway. We _can't_ come to Japan and not even karaoke once!"

"Just like we _can't_ get to Japan and not get tattooed. Let me see that ink again," Christian teased, and Anastasia glared at him.

Christian chuckled at the indignation displayed on her face and took their plates to the sink.

"You just don't want to go because you don't want me to hear how awful of a singer you are," She teased, making Christian chuckle a little bit before he sat back in front of her.

"Or maybe I just like making you work for it. You're adorable when you pout."

"I'm _not_ adorable," She countered, her cheeks slightly reddening, and Christian simply smirked at her, picking some berries from her bowl.

They spent the afternoon watching movies. Well, one movie that lasted far longer than any movie he had ever seen before. Apparently Anastasia was a sucker for old movies, and they ended up watching _Gone with the Wind_. During the four hours of the movie, Christian watched Anastasia more than the movie, trying to understand what she could find interesting in any of the characters on display. Both the girl and the guy were obnoxious to him.

When the time to go to the karaoke came, Anastasia was like a child, which made Christian smile at her enthusiasm. Actually, during their whole two weeks in Tokyo, he never saw her as excited as she was to go karaoke singing. When he asked her about it, she explained that it was because she loved going to karaokes. It was her favourite thing to do with her best friend, that and drinking fruity alcoholic drinks with unpronounceable names, despite the fact that she was not legal yet.

"But you being boring you, you, of course, have no idea of what the buzz of the alcohol does to you," She pointed out, looking at the menu songs, before squealing, "They have a Madonna song! I _have_ to sing it."

Christian watched her write down the song that she picked for herself, but he didn't have to wonder for long what was so special about Madonna songs as she explained, "Kate and I always sing a Madonna song when we go karaoke. Because the first song we ever sang together in public was _Like a Virgin_. Of course, our parents had a good laugh about this because we were seven or something, and completely not getting the meaning of the song. We just thought it had a good beat."

"How can you not get the meaning of the word 'virgin'?" Christian mused, earning a glare from Anastasia.

"Did you hear what I just said? We were _seven_! Normal seven years olds are pure and innocent at that age. Sorry if that wasn't the case for you."

Christian shook his head, looking at the menu for the drinks, pondering if he should tease Anastasia even more and simply ask for some jasmine tea. He was checking the snacks, when she tore him out of his thoughts and asked,

"You're going to sing, right?"

"I never said that I would sing."

"You said that you were just playing around with me. But you're going to sing?"

And it was right at that moment that Christian understood Raymond as he had never understood him before. A part of him had always wondered why Raymond wasn't stricter with his daughter. Not that the mobster let her do crazy things, but Christian noticed over the years that 'no' was a word that had some difficulties coming out of Raymond's mouth when Anastasia asked him for something. The only time he refused her anything was when he was concerned about her safety.

And now that he was facing an Anastasia that was asking for him to do such a simple little thing, he couldn't find it in himself to refuse her that. He couldn't bear to take away her excitement and happiness of the moment. So he simply shrugged, making her squeal as her eyes scanned the menu she had in her hands.

"How about this song?" She deviously proposed, and Christian simply glanced at the title she was pointing to before raising an eyebrow at her.

"You think I'm not man enough, and that I will cower from the song?"

She beamed at him, before writing down the name of the song she had chosen for him and giving it to the man taking care of the karaoke. Then, they ordered their drinks, Christian remaining soft with his Coke as they enjoyed watching people sing various songs while drinking their beverages.

Christian was actually surprised to see that a couple of people had chosen to sing old French songs, and had he known that there were some in the repertoire, he would have gone to them rather than to the one Anastasia had chosen for him.

When the time came for her turn to sing, she happily jumped her way to the stage, not without asking Christian to record her performance so she could send it to her best friend. Once on stage, she sang _Like a Prayer _with panache and without a care in the world, shaking her body to the song as if she was performing a concert herself. But as he was recording her antics on her phone, Christian didn't focus on her craziness; he instead focused on her voice and had to admit that the girl could sing. But then again, she probably had private music teachers growing up that taught her how to hit each note properly.

Then, it was Christian's turn, and so he went on stage, leaving Anastasia alone at their table, out of breath. She winked at him, holding her phone to record him as well while a smirk grew on her delicious lips; and Christian decided to simply ignore her. He looked at the screen, a part of him wondering if this would be easier for him if, like Anastasia, he had a few drinks in his system, and alcohol inhibiting him, but then he decided that he didn't care. It was one song, and he knew that he was certainly not going to make a show out of it as she'd just done.

He sang _Man! I Fell Like A Woman_, his eyes mostly glued to the screen because, though he knew the song, he didn't know the lyrics by heart; and when he got back to his and Anastasia's table, she was bent in half, replaying the video she'd just made of him.

"You have the man shirt, but where is the short skirt, Christian?"

He rolled his eyes at her, taking a sip of his tea whilst she kept on laughing at him, playing over and over again the chorus of the song. Then she paused, and put her phone down, her face suddenly serious as she whispered,

"Though if you wear a short skirt, everyone is going to see your monster-cock, and we can't have that, can we?"

"I think you're obsessing over my dick. I'm going to have to put a restraining order against you to protect it."

"Well … if you promise to keep on eating me, despite the ban …" She wiggled her eyebrows at him, and he shook his head, pretending to be interested in the other singers.

They stayed for another couple of hours, Anastasia going back to the stage several times, each time enjoying herself more than the previous time, and each time, bringing a smile to Christian's face, despite the fact that this was against everything he was. Whenever he went out, with the guys, or alone, he always made sure to bring as little attention to himself as possible. Mostly because being the centre of attention didn't go with his line of work. But there was something about seeing the brunette being so happy that made him … care less about everything else.

When they made their way home, Anastasia was definitely tipsy, but she wasn't drunk. Christian had seen enough people drunk (including Ryan and Jose) to know how a drunken person acted like. She made fun of him being so tall compared to her, even though she was wearing heels, she called him a robot for not knowing how to feel or how to have fun, she debated with herself on whether or not broccolis would one day take over the world.

And all the while, Christian silently listened to her, helping her walk straight and keeping to himself that he found drunk Anastasia even more adorable than bargaining Anastasia. They were just on the front porch when it started to rain heavily, and Anastasia spun around under the falling drops, her face facing the sky, giggling with glee whilst her white summer dress was getting soaked by the rain.

Without being able to stop himself, Christian interrupted her moment of joy, brought his hand to her face to gently caress her cheek and kissed her lips, being rewarded by the brunette jumping into his arms.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

Later that night, Christian was awoken by Anastasia screaming beside him. He jolted awake, reaching first for his gun before looking at the brunette who was still screaming in her sleep. After the first few seconds of stupor, Christian gently shook the girl, hoping that it would wake her, but when it didn't, he did it with a bit more heart, softly calling her name.

"Anastasia. Anastasia. _Ana_!"

Finally, she snapped her eyes open and sat right up, taking in her surroundings before lying back on the bed, leaving a dumbfounded Christian staring at her. They had spent thirteen nights together, and this had never happened before. He watched her fall back to sleep as quickly as she sat up, and when he was sure that her breathing was regular, he lay back next to her, making sure to take her in his arms.

For a moment he simply stared at the ceiling, resisting the temptation to check on the time as his thumb mindlessly caressed the girl's bare arm. They hadn't had sex when they came back to the house, because no matter how pushy Anastasia had been, Christian didn't like the idea of having sex with someone who had more than a couple of drinks. It was a rule that he had imposed on himself if _he_ was sober, he was going to make sure that the girl he would bring home would be sober enough as well.

So when they came back, Christian had to bargain with Anastasia to drop the idea of 'getting some of that monster-cock' with them simply going to bed and seeing where the morning would take them. Not that he felt like he was losing anything in that bargain.

Slowly, he started drifting to sleep, when Anastasia stirred a little next to him and moved so her head would rest on his torso. Christian didn't think much about that until she mumbled,

"I don't want to go back, Christian. I'm good here, with you."

Christian froze, waiting for her to say something else, but when she didn't, he called her name a couple of times before coming to the conclusion that she was sleep talking. But those few words that she had uttered kept him awake for the rest of the night, because, if he was honest with himself, a part of what she said could also apply to him.

He did want to go back because no matter what, he liked his job. Even if he had killed people, even if he had threatened people, he still liked his job. And more, he liked working for Raymond. But … he was also good with Anastasia. Having her in his arms at night was something that he had come to like very much, and knew he was going to miss that when they would get back to the US.

And then came the question of will he have a future? He was planning on telling Raymond, because he never kept anything from his boss, and felt that this was the one thing he _really_ shouldn't keep secret from the mobster. He didn't really know how he would tell Raymond without being too explicit about his actions (or even the feelings he was doing his best to deny), but he knew he would come clear, but would Raymond let him live?

Over the past three years, Christian had seen how Raymond handled the few boyfriends Anastasia had brought home to him. He saw how Raymond always made sure that Anastasia would never suspect he was the reason her suitors broke up with her a month after meeting him. So as far as he knew, Raymond never hurt any guy that Anastasia was seeing. But Christian was more than any guy, and he did more than see Anastasia. He fornicated with her, and by doing so, he betrayed the trust Raymond had in him. And Christian knew firsthand what Raymond did to the people who betrayed his trust.

When morning lights peeked through the curtains, Christian got out of the bed, making sure that Anastasia was properly covered before he went to do what became his usual exercise whilst in Japan. Then, he started cooking breakfast, a part of him liking that Raymond took a rental rather than a hotel. He liked to cook, and if the day before was any indication, he liked that Anastasia liked his cooking.

"Do you really think that I can eat that many pancakes?" Anastasia's voice echoed behind him, full of sleep and astonishment. Christian turned, smiling at the brunette as he pointed out,

"These aren't pancakes. They're crêpes. They're much thinner and much tastier."

Anastasia rolled her eyes, sitting at the table after having poured herself a glass of water, and they ate in silence for a little while, Christian seeing from the corner of his eye that she was enjoying his food, even if she thought it was too much. He waited a little to see if she would bring up her nightmare on her own, but when she didn't, he simply asked,

"So? You want to talk about last night?"

She smirked at him, biting her lower lip as she reminded him of something else entirely, "What? You won't even let me digest first? You should have brought it up before I started digging into those delicious pan— _crêpes_."

"That's not what I meant. You woke up screaming last night.

This had the merit to stop her jokes and make her frown. He was about to insist, when a sad look of nostalgia clouded her face and she said in a very evasive tone, "I used to have night terrors when I was little. The rain probably triggered them to return."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

The week that they spent at Okinawa was far different than the weeks they spent in Tokyo. For starters, Anastasia didn't ask even once to go shopping, which was a real relief to Christian. Not that he would have argued with her if she had decided on doing so, but he could really appreciate the fact of not being trapped following a girl from boutique to boutique and waiting for her in front of the changing room like a creeper.

They actually spent most of their time either at the beach, or at the house, but mostly together. Christian taught Anastasia how to cook French toasts, as well as his favourite dish, _Chana Masala_. She made him watch several other old and long movies, though they weren't as terrible as he thought. When Anastasia asked for his opinion of _Gone with the Wind_, she told him to not view the movie as a romance, but as it was, a life story of a woman who braved a world of men and war to survive and perpetuate her family name. Anastasia also used the opportunity to reveal that there was a piano in the house so she could teach Christian a few easy and simple children's songs, though she was surprised to learn that Christian could play the guitar.

The few times they weren't together were when Anastasia was on the phone with either her father, or Kate, or when Christian worked out (making Anastasia once again make fun of him for not relaxing fully during his holidays). Christian texted Raymond a couple of times to know how things were going back in the US, just like he had when he was in Tokyo.

And just like that, their week in Okinawa flew by, without Christian even realising it.

It was only when he'd packed his bag that something out of this week struck him as odd. He was checking his toiletry bag and realised that the box of condoms had been untouched during the whole week they had spent on this island. They hadn't had sex even once, after their time in the kitchen. And, actually, neither of them had even asked for it. They joked about it, with Anastasia endlessly teasing him about his 'monster-cock', but they never actually had sex.

But he didn't get to linger on that realization for long as Anastasia pressed him to hurry, or she wouldn't have time to wander off in the duty-free shops. Christian half smiled to himself, seeing the crazy shopper making an apparition, and he finished packing before she was even dressed, making sure to tease her about it when they got in the cab.

The flight was as uneventful as usual, but when the captain told them that they would soon arrive in New York JFK, Anastasia sat up straight and turned her head to Christian.

"Since we're still not on American soil, I just want to remind you about the deal, Christian. _What happens in Japan, stays in Japan_."

"I know."

"I mean it! I don't want you running to my Dad and telling him all about our time there."

"You know that I am going to talk to him, Anastasia."

"_No_! What happened was fun whilst it lasted, but now that it's over, there is no point of you telling him, especially since it's something that has no meaning now that we are back."

Christian didn't retort anything to that, though all he could think about was that the past three weeks meant something to him. No matter what, even if he knew it was just for those three weeks and that they will never get to go back to them, they still meant something to him.

"Please Christian. Just do that one simple thing for me," She pleaded as the captain was telling them that they had landed safely, and Christian unbuckled his seatbelt as he promised her,

"I won't say a word."

They got off the plane in silence, falling back into the people they were when they boarded, heading to Japan, and Christian felt his heart fall deeper in his stomach when he saw at the checkout point, Raymond and Jose waiting for them. When Anastasia saw them as well, she happily waved at them before rushing to her father and hugging him in a loving embrace.

"Why didn't you tell me that you were coming to pick me up?"

Raymond didn't say anything, his brown eyes solely on Christian, making his daughter grimace. "I just got back, and you're going away?"

This seemed to break Raymond out of his stare, and he looked at his daughter with love and adoration, kissing her forehead as he told her,

"No, sweetheart, I will see you in the morning for breakfast, and you will tell me all about your trip. But for now, I need you to go home with Jose. Evan is waiting for you in the parking lot."

"You're not coming?"

Raymond looked back towards Christian, as he explained, "Not right now. I have some issues to discuss with Christian."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So this was a chapter with a lot of ... dare I say it? Fluff! Yeah, you read right, I can write cute stuff from time to time!**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of this Ana actually? I never asked you guys! What do you think of her?**

💚**What do you think of Christian and his thoughts of Ana? And please keep in mind that last conversation they had!**

💚** What do you think Raymond wants with Christian? Is this how Christian will end?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

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‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

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**Guest: **_Well, now you know who Eric is … was, haha … But as I say, pay attention to the small hints and remember that those characters are VERY OOC._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	10. Chapter 9: Revelations & Realisations

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

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**Chapter 9****: Revelations & Realisations (7,7K)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian silently followed his boss to the parking lot, where Raymond parted with his daughter, not without kissing her forehead once again and promising her to see her over breakfast. Anastasia meaningfully glanced at Christian before she entered the car, clearly hoping that he would do good by his promise.

Then, Raymond and Christian got in their own limousine as Anastasia was driven away. The two men hopped into the back of the black car, Christian briefly saluting Luke who was in the driver's seat. The man winked at Christian, about to ask him how he was doing when Raymond cut him off,

"To the Mile High. And roll up the partition."

Luke did as told, and Christian did not utter a word as the car made its way out of the parking lot. The fact that Raymond had just mentioned the largest and most luxurious hotel he owned, Christian knew that there was business to be discussed. After all, Christian knew that his boss was clever enough to not cause a scene in one of the most famous places he owned.

For a moment, neither of the men said a thing, Christian simply waiting for Raymond to fill him in on what was expected of him, and Raymond sending some emails via his phone. When he was finished, he looked through his window before asking,

"How was Japan? I hope Ana didn't give you too much trouble."

"Everything went smoothly. It wasn't as … unpleasant as I had thought it would be," Christian guaranteed, his voice reassuring and neutral as usual.

Raymond slightly turned his head to look at him, an eyebrow raised up as he pointed out, "Nobody likes looking after Ana. Not even Jose. She always makes fusses."

Christian couldn't help the smirk that grew on his lips as he agreed with the older man, "Yeah. I noticed how … _stubborn_ she can get. But I have done more unpleasant jobs than looking after your daughter, Raymond."

"Stubborn … That's a nice way to put it. But then again, I guess that you had to bend a little in front of her _stubbornness_," Raymond said, a mocking smile spreading across his face and making Christian frown out of incomprehension.

He knew that more than once, Raymond had told him that his daughter was pigheaded, unreasonable, and borderline unmanageable at times; which was why he'd laughed at the euphemism Christian used. But that did not explain why he was making fun of Christian at that moment. Of course, that was until Raymond showed Christian a picture on his phone that made the young man miss a breath.

It was a picture that Anastasia had begged him to take with her when they went to visit the Imperial Palace, the two of them dressed in kimonos. She was smiling, making peace signs with her fingers; her hair done in traditional Japanese fashion, and behind her stood Christian, all but brooding at the fact that he had to take a picture.

"If I had known that Ana was the means of making you loosen up a bit, I would have put you on her back sooner."

Christian glared at the picture, wondering why Anastasia would send this picture to her father when she was so adamant of not telling him anything about what had happened during the past few weeks, but he did not linger on that. Instead, he looked away from the phone, and naturally said,

"As I said, she can be very stubborn."

Raymond laughed a little more, but when Luke took a turn getting them closer to the hotel, seriousness reclaimed his features. "Do you remember Flynn?"

Christian nodded, recalling that he was a politician that Raymond helped rise into power more than a decade ago. It was before his time, but that did not mean that Christian didn't know all that needed to be known about the man. He knew that Raymond paid for all his campaigns, paid to give him the best advisors and that he was now running to be Mayor of New York.

"Well, it seems that Flynn forgot some rules about being under my protection. I want you to remind him of them."

Christian raised an eyebrow at his boss, knowing exactly what was expected of him; but waiting to have more information on the matter before saying anything. He knew it wasn't a matter of money, because Raymond made profits from having the man in the position of power he was in.

"Did he not pay—"

"All the money I was supposed to get from that man has already been given years ago. It's not about the money. It's about his morals."

They soon reached Alicante and when they parked upfront, Christian looked up to the top of the hotel, a sarcastic smirk on his lips. Flynn was known in the city for being a good politician that helped the poor and made sure to get rid of the scum. But he was also famous for his infidelities. He had been spotted several times with secretaries and advisors, his wife being none of them as she was waiting for him at home with their toddler.

"You want me to go upstairs and preach to the man against adultery. No offence Raymond, but I am not a priest."

Raymond raised an eyebrow at him as if he was seeing Christian in a new light. "Do you condone adultery?"

"_Me_? I thought you knew me better than that. Of course not. But that is my personal opinion, regarding my personal life. And you're the one who always tells me not to mix personal matters with professional matters."

"I did, didn't I," Raymond said with a small nod. "But it isn't about the cheating. If it was, I would have never funded him in the first place. It's about his choice of 'lovers'. He's hired an escort that should arrive in his room within the next half hour. I want you to go upstairs and remind him that we do not tolerate sex-trafficking in Idris."

Idris was a mob that was very powerful and very well built, and Christian always admired that about Raymond. How he made it come from nothing. And what he admired the most about the man was how he stood by the principals he'd begun with all along. He was not going to pretend to be someone he was not. He was a kingpin, and therefore, not above killing those who betrayed him, torturing someone who owed him money, selling drugs to the rich and almighty, or even stealing precious items to sell back to the most offering.

But there were two things he never did. He never touched children. And he never got involved with sex-trafficking. Even though it was an easy way to make money, Raymond had always been explicitly clear when it came to sex-trafficking. He had not hesitated on killing one of his own men when they'd hired a prostitute to prove his point.

It wasn't the first time Raymond had Christian intervene in a case like this. Usually, like that night, Raymond always waited for the girl to arrive, so she would have her money because pimps could get violent when they lost money. And every time he had to take care of that sort of business, Raymond always told Christian to leave the girl a number to call if they wanted out. Over the years, only a couple of girls had called, and Raymond had made sure to get them out of the system, paying for their school and their tuitions.

Christian had always wondered what made him so adamant to that particular cause, but he never asked. Mostly because he felt that it was related to Raymond's personal life, and he didn't want to pry into his boss's privacy.

"How long have you known?"

"Luke confirmed it this morning."

"Are you sure she's a hooker and not just some … _friend_?"

"Why do you automatically assume the hooker is a she?"

Christian frowned, not sure where the question was coming from. In his mind, it was pretty clear that sex-trafficking was applied to girls.

"Because we're talking about hookers."

"And there are no frustrated homosexuals in this world? Or middle-aged women looking for a way to pass through their midlife crises? Don't be so narrow-minded and think that just because people usually pay girls for sex, it applies to all such cases."

"So am I going to find a boy upstairs?"

"No. A girl. Probably blonde, because even though his wife is a brunette, he always goes for blondes. I just want you to stop being so … obtuse of what you think life is. Life is not black or white. There is grey all over this world."

Christian nodded, before getting out of the car. Then, he watched Luke drive away, grimacing as he realized that he would have to cab it home or take the tube. He would probably ride a cab though because he didn't like taking the tube. As he was thinking of how he would get home, Christian rode the elevator up to the suite number Raymond had given him, and it occurred to him then that Flynn was clearly not a man who had his affairs in a discreet manner. He couldn't even give this little thing that was discretion to his wife.

When he was at the door in question, Christian opened it with a card key that he always had in his wallet that could open any door to the rooms in that hotel, and he walked in without a care in the world.

He found Flynn laying lazily in his bed, his bathrobe covering his pale body while his green eyes opened wide upon seeing Christian. "_Who are you_? What are you doing here?!"

Christian smirked at the man, pulling back the hotel's desk chair and sitting on it, waiting for the hooker to knock at the door. His gazed long at the man in front of him, who had the decency to properly close his robe as he mumbled between his teeth, "I'm calling security. This is unacceptable. Do you know who I am?"

"Do you know who I come from?" Christian countered in a cool demeanour that made Flynn freeze. He slowly turned, his eyes narrowing, before uttering,

"You must be the muscle everyone talks about. The one who throws away the dirty laundry whilst Raymond looks squeaky clean, like the perfect businessman he always appears to be."

"I must be that muscle. Which means you know why I am here?"

Flynn looked at Christian straight in the eye, clearly panicked by Christian's tone and presence. After all, Christian always stayed in the shadows, but as Flynn had just pointed out, he made himself quite a reputation in Idris and amongst the people affiliated to the mob. And usually, people who saw him without Raymond by his side were people who were about to be in deep trouble. Or about to die.

"Whatever Raymond thinks I did, I didn't do it. He should know better. I'm not even in office, yet. Why would I screw up now?"

As if to prove him wrong, there was a slight knock on the door, making Christian's smirk grow even wider. He got up to open the door to the girl. She was probably in her late teens, early twenties maybe. Her hair was beach blonde and her eyes were an icy blue. She was wearing the shortest red dress that had ever been created, with black heels that complimented the curves of her behind.

Christian gently let her in, following her back into the room. Flynn looked from the girl to Christian, his eyes revealing the panic that was inside him, but his body and face being void of emotions. This was probably why he was a rather good politician. Except for his eyes, no one could tell what he was thinking.

The girl, on the other hand, didn't seem happy to be there, and even less with two men instead of one. "What is your name?"

"Mia."

Christian nodded, before looking at Flynn. "Well, don't be rude. Give your guest what she came for."

"_What_?!"

"You heard me. Give her the money so she can have her night off," Christian said more explicitly, everything in his tone indicating that he was not playing around. Mia looked panicked as she said,

"Don't send me back! I'll do whatever you want, but don't send me back, or she will have my head cut off!"

"We're giving you the night off, Mia. What you do with your night is for you only to know. And like I just said, you will have your money that my good friend here will provide," Christian reassured her.

Flynn glared at Christian, trying to withhold his position, but all it took from the copper-haired man was to reposition himself in his chair to make the politician get up and reach for his wallet. "And don't forget the tip. We were two, after all," Christian taunted.

Then, when Mia had the money in hand, Christian walked her back to the door, realizing as he did so that he did not have the card he usually gave girls in this situation. On the card was a number to call, and a place to go to if they wanted out; but since he took this job just right out of the airport, he came rather unprepared.

"Do you have your phone with you?" He asked her, and she nodded giving it to him, too happy to go without having to lay on the bed first.

Christian put his number in her phone, and told her, "In case you want out, call me. I will help. Don't hesitate, even if it's after several months."

Then she left, leaving Christian alone with the politician. The two men stared at one another for a few seconds, before Christian made his way once again into the room to put the chair back into its rightful place as he told the man behind him, "There won't be a next time, because I know you are a clever man. I know you understood your lesson. If I so much as hear you touched your wallet whilst thinking of a woman, you better start running. Because I might throw away dirty laundry, but I don't do it quick and nicely."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

Christian got home riding a cab, checking through his texts and emails. He had been back for barely a couple of hours when his phone had started to buzz in a frenzy, and now that he came to think of it, he was sure that Raymond ordered his men to not contact Christian whilst he was abroad since he didn't receive any news from anyone during his three weeks in Japan.

He was in the back of a cab when his screen lit up with Ryan's face. Christian grimaced, sure that his friend was calling to propose a night out to celebrate his comeback; and sent him a quick text before getting out of the yellow car.

**Completely washed out. But we will definitely go out next week. Let me crash first. C**

Once in the lobby of his building, Christian went through his mails, standing by his mailbox as he did so; and he rose his head when he saw someone coming out of the elevator.

Madame Angela smiled at him, making her way into the lobby as Christian closed his mailbox. She was his neighbour, living on the third floor and working at night. He actually tried to know what she was doing to work with such an unusual schedule, but Madame Angela was someone who knew how to keep her secrets.

"It's been a while, Christian. For a moment, I thought you moved out without telling me goodbye."

"I'd never do that, Madame Angela. You know that if I were ever to leave here, you'd be the first one I'd ask to come with me."

She shook her head at his flirt, smiling nonetheless. The thing about Madame Angela was that Christian always thought she was hot. Too old for him, definitely, (she could easily pass for his mother) but hot nonetheless. She was from Belgium, but with African ascendants, which made her skin have a lovely shade of chocolate. Her cheekbones were high, her face angular and her lips plump.

But despite all of her features, it was her confidence that made her stand out. She had some sort of essence emanating from her, that and the fact that she clearly didn't look her age. Christian always thought that she could be his mother, but one day, he learnt that she was much older than that and that she could actually be his grandmother. The day he learned of her true age, the saying 'black don't crack' had never seemed more true to him.

Still, he had this little flirting game with her. The two of them knew that it was just a simple joke that they shared, that it would never go further, but it was their thing whenever they would occasionally run into each other in the lobby. She started it, and he followed, making the little flirting a regular thing that would occur.

"But will I? What can a young man like you offer that I haven't already seen?"

"If only you knew, you'd never leave my apartment."

Madame Angela laughed, shaking her head slightly before gently tapping Christian's chest and walking out of the lobby. Christian smiled and walked to the elevator, feeling too lazy to take the stairs all the way up like he usually did.

Once in front of his door, he put his key into the keyhole but stopped himself from opening the door when he realized that the door wasn't locked. He was certain that he'd locked it before leaving to Japan, and no one had a double of his key, except for Jose. But Christian knew his best friend, and he knew that Jose would have left him one night of pure rest after coming back from a long mission.

So instead, Christian went back to the elevator, leaving his mail by the door, and went to the roof. He was living on the top floor, giving him a wonderful view of the city, but also giving him better access to the roof than anyone else in the building. With a little agility and a lot of nerve, he could access the roof from his condo, without having to use the stairs or the elevator. Christian never tried the other way around, because he always thought climbing up was easier than climbing down, so tonight would be a first.

He glanced down, hoping to not fall because it would be a pretty nasty fall. He saw that the lights were on in the first floor, so he carefully climbed down to his floor and pick locked the French window of his bedroom. Then, once inside his apartment, he removed his shoes, secured his gun in his hand and silently went downstairs, only to find Raymond's back facing him whilst the man read a paper.

"You're too suspicious for your own good, Christian. One day, that will get you killed."

"What are you doing here?"

"Brought you some food. I figured you would appreciate the thought," Raymond nonchalantly said, pointing to a bag of takeaway.

Christian walked to the kitchen counter where the food was, which was still rather warm, and his stomach growled happily when he realized it was Indian food. Christian took the bag and went to sit in a chair next to his boss, a spoon in hand as he asked, "Is it —"

"Yes, it's from Parvati's. She's asking about you, complaining that you're ruining her business for not coming by in almost a month."

Christian smiled, imagining the Indian woman scolding Raymond about Christian's absence. He actually went to her restaurant once a week. Indian food was his favourite kind of food. Probably because it was the first decent meal he'd had after running away. Back then, he was just a boy who had had a very bad day and didn't manage to steal any food or any money. He was questioning himself about stooping so low as to go through the garbage of a restaurant when his stomach convinced him that there was nothing low about it when avoiding starvation was the end result.

Parvati was taking out the trash when she caught him looking through the bags. She didn't scold him or chastise him. She simply took his hand (revealing that she could be quite strong), and took him to the kitchen of her restaurant where she served him a more than generous portion of food. She offered him shelter for the night as well, and Christian never forgot how this woman who knew nothing about him helped him during a cold night of winter.

He went back to her place weekly as soon as he started making money (even before Raymond) because he loved her food. And several times, he took Raymond to the place, which was rather interesting the first time around. Parvati's place looked nothing as good as her food was. It was a really small place, that didn't even look like a restaurant from the outside. The name of the restaurant was written in Hindi above it, and yet, still, the place was always packed. From opening to closing, no matter the day, there were always people.

Christian took a spoonful of rice with daahl on it, humming in delight when the flavours hit his taste buds. Then, he questioned Raymond about his presence, though he never looked away from his food, "So, apart from feeding me, why are you here?"

"How did it go?"

"As usual."

"He didn't argue or try to negotiate?"

"Nope. He was rather … unsettled to have to deal with 'the muscle'."

Raymond chuckled, and Christian kept his attention on his food, taking a naan out of the bag, before he let Raymond know, "If you want my opinion, you should stop helping him, and look for a replacement."

"A replacement?"

"Everyone knows about your views on the sex-trade, whether they are from the underground, or they're those men in shiny suits who only think of you as a businessman. _Everyone_. And yet, the guy whose campaigns you funded, whose career you built still thought he could get away with it. Either he doesn't respect you or he thinks he's untouchable. Either way, you should get rid of someone who doesn't follow that simple line of conduct. Especially someone who's so well known and not just some random guy who owes you money. You should do it because it's your code, but also because if you don't, other people will see it as an opening to do as they see fit."

Raymond remained thoughtful for a moment, letting Christian finish his meal in quiet. He wasn't afraid that his boss thought that he crossed the line, because over the years, Raymond had asked for Christian's opinion more and more often, and Christian always spoke his mind when asked.

When Christian finally put his spoon down and took a sip of his mango lassi, Raymond slowly said, "I can't get rid of him that easily. It's easy to replace a gunman, it's easy to replace a drug seller, but it's not easy to replace a politician. Especially one that's running to be mayor. It takes time."

"So does building a reputation. I didn't touch him because he is a public figure. He got away with a threat and losing some money without getting some. You're known to be ruthless, _especially_ on that matter. If word gets out that you just scolded Flynn, it won't take much time for your reputation to crumble."

"What do you suggest?"

"Cut him loose. You're no longer part of his life, and he will be in debt to you. Find yourself a new horse to bid on. One faithful, so we know he won't go to hookers. One clean enough for the public, but dirty enough to mingle with you."

"That kind of person doesn't exist, Christian. You're living in Utopia."

"Then create him. Pluck a guy out from some fancy school, and forge him as you want him to be. Pay off his college debt, so he will feel in debt to you then. Or pick a girl even. Just get rid of Flynn."

Once again, Raymond fell into silence, his eyes showing that he was already thinking of all the possibilities he could have, and of how he would get them. Then, he looked at Christian, curiosity in his features. "No one has ever been that straightforward with me. Not since Eric."

"Well, that means no one ever had your best interests at heart, especially not Eric," Christian retorted, getting up to do his dishes, but still noticing the way Raymond refrained himself from saying anything. "I mean, they may have had your interest in mind, but if it wasn't serving them right, they wouldn't put you first."

Raymond did not respond, replacing himself properly in the armchair he was occupying as he nonchalantly said, "When you were in Japan, you asked about my late wife."

"I did. I'm sorry, it was out of line."

"It was. Not many dare say her name, even when I'm not around." Christian went back to his boss, sitting in front of him, this time. "But like how it is common knowledge amongst the men, I like you, and I allow things with you that I don't allow with other people."

"Why?"

Christian had never understood why Raymond was so eager to show him the 'behind the scenes', why he trusted him to handle things that he usually handled alone, why he would always make sure Christian was in his entourage, whether it was Idris business or official business in the Robinson tower. He knew that Raymond valued his loyalty, but there were others that were just as loyal for far longer than him, Jose being the perfect example.

Raymond seemed to think a little about it as if he was trying to understand why himself before he explained, "Probably because I see myself in you. I started the Robinson Company when I was sixteen, the same age you were when I took you into my ranks. And just like you, I lived a life of … a gutter-rat shall we say, before. The only difference between me and you was that I had people I could count on to help me up. You killed one of them, and the other is living a few floors below you."

"Elena Kavanagh?" Christian asked before immediately regretting it.

Raymond never mentioned any Kavanagh to him before that day, Jose either, and that led Christian to believe that he didn't know about Elena's and Raymond's common history. Anastasia had told him about the Kavanaghs because she was having trouble sleeping and spoke of her friends and family that she was missing, which she would have never done if they hadn't been sleeping together.

The older man rose an intrigued eyebrow at Christian but didn't comment on it. Instead, he went on, "Her name was Robinson at the time. She's the second shareholder of the company. I wouldn't have been able to start the company without her."

Christian noticed the way Raymond clenched his fists, and how his voice grew deeper with … anger as he said those words. He wondered why but did not ask. He never asked about anything personal when it concerned Raymond.

"Anyway, we were talking about Carla, not the sordid ways it took me to be where I am now. So? What did you learn from your research?"

"Who said I did research?"

"Are you going to pretend that after having my daughter tell you about her mother being from Japan, and not ever knowing anything about her, you didn't try to know a little bit?" Raymond asked, a mocking smile on his lips as he proved to Christian that he knew him very well, and how he would think and act.

"There is nothing really to know. I am sorry to have brought these painful memories when I asked you about it."

"She resents me, you know. Ana. For never talking about her mother. But … I'd rather have her resent me than have her hate me," Raymond said, his eyes now lost into space. Christian didn't utter a single word, waiting for Raymond to share when he was ready to share.

"You know that I've been married twice. The first time around, it was out of duty. I beat the odds by getting her pregnant. She had been declared sterile by her doctor at a very young age, and I was using protection because I knew she wasn't the most loyal girl. She was a free spirit.

She got pregnant and got a paternity test before telling me. She wasn't actually that bad of a person. She just asked that I provided for the child because she grew up poor, and she didn't want that for her child. I didn't even think of asking her for an abortion, because I knew it was probably her one and only chance to have a child. I was starting to make _really_ good money, with Robinson and with Idris, so I married her.

She … clearly wasn't with me for the money. And she stopped fooling around as soon as she knew she was pregnant. I bought this building a few weeks after we married, and we lived in this exact condo you live in. She said that I was extravagant, but did not complain, especially when she was fully into her second trimester.

The doctors had her bedridden because of her fragile constitution. Elena spent a lot of time with her. And the more she was getting further into her pregnancy, the sicker she was getting, the weaker she was getting. Until the day the doctors said that they should induce labour. So they did, and she didn't make it.

I wasn't really sad about it. I wasn't thrilled, but I wasn't sad either.

And a few years later, I met Carla …"

Raymond stopped himself, sadness overcoming his features. For a moment, Christian thought that he was never going to get the end of the story, but then Raymond deeply breathed through his nose, and continued, as if he was talking to the wind,

"Carla, I married out of love. I bought the ring a month after meeting her. But strangely enough, I was not as confident in the matter of love than in the matter of business. It took me a year to propose. She was … an angel. If I were to put it simply. I'd never met someone who was as selfless, kind, and open-minded as she was.

When she got pregnant with Ana, I became a bit paranoid. I was so scared to lose her to childbirth because I knew it would affect me more than it did with my first wife. But everything went fine, and she gave me Ana…"

Once again, Raymond stopped himself, swallowing with difficulty, his eyes still lost into space and Christian said nothing, afraid to break the trance Raymond was in, lost in the memory of his beloved wife.

"We were actually trying to get another child when she died. Well … she was supposed to go to the doctor the day after the fire, to see if she was pregnant, but I never had the courage to ask the coroner if I lost a child in the addition of a wife. I'd rather think I didn't."

And finally, Raymond broke out his trance, looking straight into Christian's grey eyes with his brown eyes and showing him contained anger that Christian had never seen in his boss' eyes before.

"This is one of the rare times I mixed personal matters with professional ones. I never lied to Carla about who I was, she knew everything there was to know about me, both the good and the bad. But I wasn't careful about it. I didn't protect her, thinking that my name was protection enough.

Ana was ill with chickenpox the night of the charity, and Carla told me to stay with our daughter because as common as it was for a five-year-old, she had never been sick before, and she was scared. I didn't think much of it and stayed home, not sending a single man to go with her.

The police broke the news to me a few hours later, saying that there had been a fire in the kitchen that quickly spread and destroyed everything. I didn't think much of it either, blaming fate. For a week I was a mess, locked in my room, away from everyone. I didn't go to her funeral, I didn't speak to a single soul.

And then Eric barged in. He was not very happy. Mostly because of Ana. She was crying all the time, no one able to comfort her, and she refused to eat, refused to sleep and to listen to anyone. Eric told me some very harsh words that night that will forever stay branded in my brain. I might have lost a wife, but Ana was losing both her parents because I didn't help her with her grief.

So I swallowed my sorrow, and went to comfort my daughter …"

As Raymond took a small break in his tale, Christian furrowed his brows. This was not making sense. Anastasia always said that Raymond never talked about her mother. And Raymond had started his story by telling Christian that he would rather have his daughter resent him than hate him. He thought about it for a moment, when it suddenly became as clear as water to him.

"She died because of you," He whispered, not sure if he was talking to his boss, or to himself; Raymond nodded.

"She did. Eric told me two days later that he had hired some people to look into the fire, and found out that it'd been arson. At that time, I had one big rival in the drug business, and because of my sorrow, I had stopped any sort of business, giving my opponent a perfect opportunity to cease every drug deals he could lay his hands on.

The man did not last, neither did his men. I was rather sadistic with them and took my time enjoying their slow death.

But … I never managed to talk about Carla with Ana. I couldn't talk to her about the person that she would never get to see again because of me, especially when it's so painful for me to talk about her. And most importantly, I couldn't tell my daughter who saw me as the best person in the world, who loved me to the moon and back, that her mother was dead because of my own actions. I couldn't … And as the years continue to pass, I still can't. I won't be able to take her hate, her sadness, her disappointment."

Christian did not say a word as Raymond lost his gaze into space once more. Instead, he got up and went upstairs to his office. There, he took his phone out of his pocket, ignoring Ryan's texts, along with many others, and connected it to the printer so he could print one specific document out of his phone. Once it was done, he went back downstairs, finding Raymond in the same position he'd left him in. He rested a comforting hand on the man's shoulder before letting him know,

"You should go home, Raymond. Dawn is almost upon us, and your daughter will have much to tell you in the morning. Go get some rest."

Then, he gave the older man the piece of paper he had just printed. It was the picture he had taken of Anastasia next to her mother's photo in ISSH before going back upstairs, leaving Raymond alone, holding a picture that he never thought he would ever get to hold in his hands.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

Christian walked through the lobby of his building, thinking that he would indulge himself with the elevator ride. He had just come back from Washington, and from two days without getting any sleep, he was feeling like his mind and body were about to break. Which he thought was weird, considering that he normally barely slept four hours at night. Ryan told him that it was because his body was used to getting sleep, even if it was a little, and since he slept so little normally, he had no reserve of energy to go on. To this, Christian didn't argue much, even if he didn't agree. He didn't have the strength to do so.

It had been two months since he came back from Japan, and finally, things were starting to have their normal rhythm again. For the past couple of months, Christian had had to deal with many things that made him regret having gone to Japan. Little things that Raymond didn't concern himself with anymore, entrusting them to Christian, and they had been unlooked after during the three weeks that he'd been gone.

At some point, Christian admitted his mistake to Raymond (after having taken care of each of them), and Raymond had all but laughed at him. He had told Christian that it was a test and that Christian acted like a rookie. He taught Christian that even if he was on a trip (regardless of it being for leisure or business), it didn't mean that he could forget about all of his other duties. Either he had someone he completely trusted to take over or he handled things from long distance. And Christian swore to himself to never make that mistake again.

Now, he was back from Washington where he had been working with a promising young man that he hoped he would be able to lure into his web, so he could place him in New York to replace Flynn. Raymond had followed Christian's advice and cut ties with Flynn, who took the news rather badly. He refocused his whole campaign against 'rich corporations with shady past', losing a big part of his electorate. Either people didn't like his new course of action or people didn't like that he changed his course of action, to begin with.

But now, Christian was more than certain that Paul Clayton would come to New York within the next month. Within the next week if he upped the ante with his convincing. The young lad had just finished an internship at the White House and had been planning on staying in DC, instead of coming back to his native New York. But Christian had worked on Paul Clayton, to the point of wearing the both of them out, and now, Christian knew that Raymond would soon have a new politician in his pocket.

The elevator's doors were about to close, when a foot slipped in between the small gap, activating the sensors, and forcing the doors to reopen. Christian stopped himself from grunting in impatience, not liking the thought of sharing the elevator ride with anyone, but his breath caught in his throat when he saw Anastasia standing in front of him. For a few seconds, they both simply stared at one another, until the doors started closing again, and Anastasia swiftly entered the elevator, before turning so her back would be facing Christian.

And all Christian could do was stare at the brunette, feeling like his mind was going numb.

For the past couple of months, they hadn't seen each other, not even a glimpse. Christian often went to the mansion to either see Raymond or pick him up to go some place. But Anastasia was never around to be seen or was simply in her bedroom. And Christian had to admit … he more often than not thought of her.

Two weeks after they got back to Japan, Ryan took Christian to a bar he quite liked to pick up girls, and Christian had jumped on the occasion because he was starting to realize that he was thinking of this 'fantasy' he'd had in Japan more than he should've been. He got himself a girl, but she never really aroused him, and the more he thought of bringing her home, the less he liked the idea. So he simply pleasured her in a dark corner of the bar and went back home alone to his fantasy.

And this was when he realized that he missed the brunette. Of course, he missed her sexually, what was there not to miss? But he missed the person more. He missed how she was so carefree, he missed her smile, he missed her smart mouth, and he missed her beautiful blue eyes and her perfect ass. But most of all, he missed feeling her in the curve of his arms at night.

For a brief second, he wondered what she was doing on her own, without anyone around her to protect her. After Raymond's little talk about his late wife, Christian understood why Raymond was so paranoid about his daughter's safety. But then, he recalled that the Kavanaghs lived in the same building as him and that Anastasia often visited her best friend. When she did so, Jose simply dropped her off at the entry of the building since Anastasia had managed to negotiate that part with her father.

Suddenly, Christian reached for the emergency stop button, and halted the elevator, making them bounce a little at the sudden stop. Anastasia turned a curious look at him, and all he could do was stare at the face that he had missed so much over the last couple of months.

"I miss you," he whispered, not even conscious of his words before they escaped his mouth. Anastasia narrowed her eyes at him, clearly not believing him before she turned her back to Christian to face the closed doors again.

"No, you don't. You miss the sex."

"You think I can't land a girl if I want to? Don't tell me what I miss and don't miss. It's _you_ that I miss," Christian said in a voice curter than he had intended. He noticed the way her back went rigid and how she was picking under the nails of her left hand.

"Look at me, Anastasia," He pleaded, and she spun on her heels, glaring at him as she hissed between her gritted teeth,

"_You miss me_, and yet you keep calling me by my full name!"

This accusation took Christian by surprise, mostly because he never called Anastasia by her nickname, out of respect. She never asked for it, so he never did it, thinking that it was a way for her to distance herself from him. And now, this little gesture of reverence he had for her was turning against him. So he took her face between his hands, forcing her to look at him, and told her,

"I miss you, _Ana_. I miss your smile, I miss your jokes, and I miss having your body in my arms when I wake up. I simply miss _you_."

She looked away, refusing to hold his gaze and stepped back, muttering as Christian let go of her, "Kate is going to wonder what's taking so long."

At those words, Christian also took a step back, and unstopped the elevator, wondering what had taken over him. He never planned for this conversation to happen, and he didn't like how for a split second, he'd felt … vulnerable. Especially when he was saying words that weren't returned.

The numbers went up, taking them closer to their different floors when Ana suddenly stopped the elevator. She turned to face Christian, her blue eyes soft and hesitant as she told him,

"I miss you too, Christian … But … I know where your loyalty lies, and I don't want my father to become an issue like it usually does."

"You're right," Christian admitted, a lump growing in his throat. He couldn't think of starting anything with the daughter of the man who trusted him with his own life.

Christian was about to release the button once again, when, once again, his actions went further than his thoughts. He bent a little to kiss the brunette, and only released the button when she responded to him by kissing him back, jumping in his arms.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

When Christian woke the next morning, a grin stretched across his face before he'd even opened his eyes, and he snuggled Ana closer to his chest. She barely stirred, still lost in the land of dreams, and he opened his eyes to see the thing he missed the most. Ana sleeping in his arms. Softly, he caressed the angles of her face, brushing away the loose hairs that had escaped her bun, but his state of glee was suddenly interrupted when he heard noises in his apartment.

Silently, he reached for his gun, getting out of the bed without waking up the brunette and he walked soundlessly to the door of his bedroom. He was about to open it when it swung open.

The familiar intruder lost his words when they came face to face, before his brown eyes went to the bed where Ana was still sleeping, oblivious to the two men at the door. The man, who was older than Christian, analyzed the bed, and seeing that there was nothing he could tell of the girl since she was concealed by the blanket, he looked around the room. When his eyes landed on the pile of clothes on the chair, his brown eyes quickly jumped back to Christian, who was shirtless.

There was a moment of silence before the truth was uttered, "_You're a dead man!_"

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

‼️**NEXT CHAPTER WON'T BE IN Christian'S POV**‼️

**(If you can guess who's point-of-view it will be, you get a sneak peek)**

**.**

💚** So this was a chapter where we learnt a bit more about Christian's work, past and about Raymond's late wife. **

💚** There are a few hints in this story, and to lead you on the right tracks, it has to do about Raymond's position concerning the sex-trade. Actually, anyone who can tell me why he is so against it can get a sneak peek into the next chapter **😉

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of this introduction we had in Christian's and Raymond world?**

💚**What do you think of Raymond and his reveal concerning Carla?**

💚** Who do you think is at the door?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Mar: **_Well, Christian definitely feels something, but since we don't have Ana's pov, we don't know. That's the beauty of it, we don't know what she thinks, just like we wouldn't know if we had HER POV._

**Guest1: **_Well, I'm glad you stumbled on this story. And see, Christian is still alive so far ..._

**Guest2: **_See, Christian is still alive ... so far. Now, the story is not over yet, though_

**Guest3: **_So if you go back to the very first update, you will see that at the beginning, I did say that this story is one I have already wrote for another fandom and that I am writing for FSOG, after a reader asked me to make it with Ana and Christian's characters. And that is why you caught a couple of errors that went past me. I do try to hunt them down so it is easy for you guys to read, but I am only human, and obviously still miss a few. I'll try to be even more careful in the future. BUT I do really appreciate your concern about the possibility of plagiarism. I have been affected by this, and the idea of people lie you looking out for people like me is always heartwarming. So thank you so much, and now that this is cleared, I do hope you will get to enjoy the story even more. And just in case you doubt my words, you can go on my page, and you will see that there is a story started three years ago that has the same summary like this one, under the name of The Boss's Daughter._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	11. Chapter 10:Revealed & Unrevealed Secrets

**My dear little broccolis **

** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **

**.**

**Chapter 10****:Revealed & Unrevealed Secrets (5,6K)**

‼️**PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP**‼️

**.~~. .~~. .~~.**

**Jose's PoV**

**I know both Jose and Ethan are out of characters compared to the source material, but this is how I want them. Plus, I want everyone to remember that age has nothing to do with coming out, and how confident you feel about your sexuality. There are elderly people who still struggle with their sexuality, having sudden insecurities concerning it, when they have been confident about everything else their whole life. Just keep that in mind as you read the story.**

**Also, remember Jose is five years older than Christian (30) and Ethan is the same age as Christian (25)**

**.~~. .~~. .~~.**

Jose looked down at the plate of pancakes in front of him, slightly frowning as he saw that most of them were burnt. He wondered if they were homemade, or if the batter came from a box, before chuckling at himself, perfectly aware of the answer. For a year that he has been seeing Ethan intimately, he had never seen the man cook something well. Even pasta managed to get messed up in the end. But nonetheless, he smiled at the blond man when Ethan put a bowl of fruits in the middle of the table, along with syrup.

They have been seeing each other for almost a year now, and Jose never managed to tell Ethan that his cooking wasn't that good. It wasn't awful, Jose had definitely tasted worst in his life, but Ethan's food was never something he was looking forward to.

"I missed you, yesterday night. I thought you'd come after work," Ethan said, to make conversation, but only managing to make Jose rather uncomfortable.

The thing was, he never told Ethan about what his job actually consisted on. To Ethan, Jose was simply a glorified bodyguard, overpaid by a very paranoid father. He knew that even though Raymond was Ethan's Godfather, and even though Elena (Ethan's mother) was well aware of who Raymond really was, Ethan only thought of his Godfather as a powerful businessman, and as his mother's best friend. Ethan had no idea of what was happening underground, and neither did Ana. Though Jose was sure that Ana always suspected something, but never confronted her father about it, preferring staying in an illusion.

Jose had known Ethan for almost as long as he had been officiated Ana's bodyguard. There was five years between them, and still, sometimes Jose felt like he was the younger one. Ethan had come out to his parents as soon as he was sure of his sexual orientation; whereas Jose was still hiding safely in his closet. Ethan had confronted many of his demons, whereas Jose was more comfortable at hiding from them. Ethan had not hesitated on pursuing him, whereas Jose had been attracted to the man and did nothing. It was one night after a movie that Ethan crossed the line and kissed him, crossed the line and became Ethan to Jose, instead of Mr Kavanagh.

Due to the fact that Jose often dropped Ana at the Kavanagh's so she could spend time with her best friend Katherine, Jose ultimately got to spend some time with their eldest son who would flee the girls as much as he could, especially when the years started passing by and their hormones started drifting apart their centre of interests. Ethan used to speak to Jose a little, and when he reached his majority, they started seeing each other more outside of Jose's work hours. It had always been rather friendly, and Ethan had never been afraid to talk about his boyfriends to Jose.

But the more the years passed by, the more Jose started wishing they could be more than friends. For a long time, he fought against this feeling, because he felt that _he_ of all people shouldn't feel anything for a man. But he would often picture himself kissing the green-eyed man, or doing things to his body that he never thought he would ever want to do, though he never acted on those thoughts.

Until the day he went to see a movie rather dull, and Ethan spotted him there while he was hanging with a bunch of friends. He dismissed his friends, telling them that he would see them at the end of the movie, and as soon as the lights were off, Ethan had leant his head and kissed Jose on the lips, without any warning. And to his greatest surprise, Jose didn't complain. He actually liked it, and responded to it, making out with the man during the whole movie.

This was how they started their relationship. Ethan told Jose that he didn't like hookups, and Jose told Ethan that if they were to try anything, he didn't want Raymond to know. Not that he thought that his boss would have a problem with him being gay (if this was what he really was), but more because he didn't want the word to get out and go to his comrades in arms.

But most importantly, Jose had told Ethan to not ask questions about his past, or what he was up to when they were not together. He would be faithful and loyal to Ethan, but there shouldn't be any questions asked. Ethan lived by that rule, not asking a single question for more than eight months; but for the last couple of months or so, he had started getting weary of that rule, saying that they couldn't build a real relationship without trust and that Jose clearly didn't trust him if he couldn't ask questions.

Jose shook himself out of his inner thoughts, and gently smiled at the man in front of him, losing himself in the green of his eyes as he told him, "I got caught up with some things, making me finish rather late. I didn't want to wake you up."

Ethan had given Jose a spare key to his apartment, so he could come and see him whenever he pleased since Jose never took Ethan back to his place. Not that he ever intended to do so. Several times, Raymond had tried to make Jose move out, and he never did, keeping his place of residence private. Only Christian knew where he lived, and of course, Christian never judged Jose for it. Actually Jose was sure that if Christian had had a place like that, he would have done the same as him, no matter what. It was the place where he had managed to survive, the place that saw him rise from the dirt, he would keep it. But he wasn't that proud to show it to his boyfriend. Especially when that said boyfriend had parents owning a whole floor of apartments in Manhattan, in addition of important holds in Robinson's Inc.

Ethan shook his head, not really interested in the answer and started eating his pancakes, drowning them under syrup and whipped cream, before slyly letting Jose know, "The whipped cream was supposed to be for yesterday night's dessert if you had come… But instead of having it on some delicious part of your body, I have it here, on my pancakes. Because you didn't want to 'wake me up'."

Jose didn't say anything, eating more the fruits than the pancakes. Ethan often joked about their sex life, even if Jose never bounced back on those jokes, and Jose never held any kind of hard feelings against his boyfriend for making jokes. It was what normal couples did. It was what normal _people_ did. All people he knew made joked about sex, men or women. Whether it was Ana whom he saw get bolder and cleverer about her jokes as she grew up, whether it was Christian who always knew how to be subtle about them, whether it was Ryan who was crude and direct to the point, or whether it was his lover who was always flirty when making them.

The only person he knew who never made a single-sex joke was Raymond. But then again, Raymond was different from other people in many, many ways.

"Anyway. I was thinking … Next week is our anniversary, in case you didn't know," Ethan said, his plate now finished and picking from the bowl of fruits as well.

"I know. Would you like something in particular, or would you rather have a surprise?"

"Well, there is this thing I want … Now, will you give it to me, here is the question?" Ethan eluded. Jose rose an eyebrow at him, surprised that he was being so elusive. Usually, when Ethan wanted something, he simply said it, even if he knew it would bring an argument.

"How about we make a reservation at The Mile High?" The younger man proposed, making Jose frown.

He knew that Ethan thought of him as a glorified bodyguard, and that was the reason Ethan always felt like he had to pay for everything. No matter how many times Jose would tell his boyfriend that he could afford whatever activity they would do, Ethan always felt like he should pay. So instead of having arguments over arguments, Ethan stopped proposing fancy restaurants and places to go, and tried to live 'like the rest of the people'.

But The Mile High was a very fancy and expensive restaurant that had belonged to Raymond. It was one of those restaurants where the menus handed to the ladies didn't have prices, and where they would put a whole set of cutlery on the table, just for the salad.

"I thought we could … eat there with my parents. So you could meet them in a neutral environment."

"To answer your question, I won't give you what you want for our anniversary. Pick something else," Jose sternly said, putting down his fork and looking straight in the eyes of his lover.

They had had this conversation already, not even two weeks ago, and it had ended with Jose storming out of Ethan's apartment saying that he didn't want to meet the Kavanagh parents as Ethan's boyfriend. Ethan stared right back at him, crossing his arms over his chest as he told Jose,

"You're going to have to meet them someday. I don't like feeling like I'm treating you like a dirty secret."

"I'm not your dirty secret, Ethan. I just don't think it's a good idea for me to meet your parents, yet."

Of course, those words were lies. He knew that he wasn't fearing meeting his boyfriend's parents as one should be at this stage of their relationship. And the excuse he gave himself about not wanting people of Idris to know was not reason enough to not grant this simple thing to Ethan. No, the real reason he didn't want to meet the Kavanagh parents was that he knew that it would mean a lot to Ethan, and he didn't want to end up hurting him.

Even though he had been with Ethan for almost a year, having sexual encounters with him and often fantasising about the man when he was alone, Jose still wasn't sure of his sexuality. When he would look at himself in the mirror and ask himself if he were gay, he couldn't answer with certainty. He couldn't say if he enjoyed being intimate with Ethan, or if it was just his body answering to something familiar.

Ethan heavily sighed, before taking a different approach, "Well, maybe you could meet Kate and Jake as my boyfriend, then? You know, one step at a time."

Jose suspiciously narrowed his eyes at the green-eyed man in front of him. "You told your family about me?"

"No. I told them I was seeing someone. I never used your name. But I have to warn you that Kate is clearly hoping that you are some sort of stereotypical queer she can go to shopping sprees with, all the while 'throwing glitter all over the world'. Apparently, I'm not gay enough for her."

This had the merit to loosen a bit the thickening atmosphere, making both men laugh for they knew that neither of them fitted that description. If anything, Jose was even less gay than Ethan according to his sister's definition.

"She'll be disappointed, then. Maybe I should start wearing eyeliner to make her feel better in her stereotype," Jose joked. Ethan laughed a little more, dimples creating on either side of his face. This was something that Jose liked very much on Ethan's smile. It didn't only bring butterflies to his stomach, it was also beautiful to watch because of those dimples. And even when Ethan hadn't shaven in a week, Jose could still see those dimples.

When their moment of joy passed, Ethan moved his chair to sit next to Jose, and once there, he laid his head against his boyfriend's shoulder as he told him, "Maybe we could go pick Jake after school, and go to a coffee shop just the four of us. So you can get to know my siblings better, and they can get to know who you are to me."

"Ethan…" Jose sighed, not wanting to get into a fight when they had just shared a peaceful moment. But apparently, it wasn't the thing to say for Ethan rose to his feet, glaring at Jose as he demanded,

"Are you ashamed of me, Jose?"

"You know it's not that. How can you even think that?"

"I don't know. Maybe you don't like the idea of being with a Daddy's boy who never had to work hard a single in his life?!"

Jose reached to take Ethan's hand in his own, but it was snapped away from him before he could do so. So instead, Jose passed it over his face, trying to find the right words to say,

"It has nothing to do with who you are, and how you live. You're the one who keeps bringing that up. It … it's just _me_."

"'It's not you, it's me'? That's what people say just before they break up," Ethan accused. Jose strongly shook his head, sure of one thing, he didn't want to keep Ethan away from him.

"I don't want to break up with you, Ethan."

"Then what is it? Because I keep trying to understand, I _really_ do. I try to understand why you don't want for us to go to the next step. But I can't. I need you to tell me why I can't present the man I love to my family!"

This made Jose freeze on himself, before looking back into Ethan's green eyes. None of them had ever said the three fateful words to the other because they were out of place. Ethan didn't know Jose. He knew nothing of him, of who he was, of what he was capable of. He only knew the facade that Jose presented to him, and nothing else.

"You didn't mean that," Jose said, his eyes never looking away as his voice appeared suddenly cold to his own ears.

"Don't you dare tell me what I mean or not! I know what I feel, and I know I'm not the one afraid of my feelings in this couple!"

This wasn't the first time Ethan was raising his voice. Every time he felt like he was losing an argument, Ethan would lose his cool and raise his voice. It was his way of staying confident in himself, and it never frightened Jose, he had learnt to live with it. But he couldn't let a man believe he loved him when he barely knew the shell of who he was.

"You don't know me, Ethan. There are things about me that you don't know. That you don't _want_ to know."

"Let me be the judge of that."

Jose slightly sighed, before specifying, "Things I don't want you to know."

Ethan's face lost all colours and expressions in the matter of a second, his eyes suddenly becoming blank at this piece of information; and Jose immediately regretted his words. Or at least the way he said them. He got up to take Ethan in his arms, but the man stepped back, refusing for Jose to touch him. He started clearing the table, saying,

"My father said he wanted me to drop by his office. I better do it when it's still early and there aren't many people there, yet."

Jose was perfectly aware that it was either a lie, either a way to get him to leave the apartment without breaking them apart, but he didn't say anything. He sighed, and simply said, "I have to pick up Ana anyway."

He was about to leave the kitchen, when Ethan frowned, confused as he informed Jose, "Ana isn't here."

Jose froze, looking at Ethan and hoping that this was some kind of sick joke. But Ethan simply shrugged and explained, "I was at Kate's yesterday night when Ana sent her a text that she wasn't feeling very well and that she was rescheduling their girls' night. Kate was very annoyed, she said she had important matter to discuss with Ana."

Jose felt his insides disappear all of the sudden his first thought being that Raymond was going to have his head for not looking properly after his daughter. He swiftly left his boyfriend's apartment, not without quickly pecking his lips; and called Luke, a very small part of him hoping that Ana had been telling the truth and that Raymond simply forgot to let him know, no matter how unlikely it was of him.

But of course, Jose wasn't that lucky, and Luke told him that everything was in order. Jose thanked him, letting him know that he was on his way to pick up the brunette, and knowing that he didn't raise any sort of suspicion in Luke's mind, it was usual of him to randomly call to see if everything was alright, just like it was usual of Christian to do the same.

For a moment, Jose tried to figure out where his boss's daughter could be. She never snuck out on him like that, because no matter how much Raymond wasn't found of his daughter having a dating life, he never put a stop to it, to avoid that very situation. More than once, Jose had dropped Ana at a boyfriend's for her to spend the night there (to Raymond's greatest displeasure). So Ana had no reason to sneak out. And even if it was a last-minute call, why would she lie to her best friend about it?

He kept on trying to understand where the brunette could have gone when he thought of his best friend. Christian was the best at disappearing from radars, but also at finding people who vanished into thin air. A couple of times he found for Raymond people who had been so well hidden that even Luke hadn't been able to find them. Jose put that on the fact that when Luke had been plucked from school because he was the best, Christian had to learn to be the best to survive in the streets, and there were things that Raphael would never understand because he didn't have the same background as Jose and Christian.

So without a single hesitation, Jose took the elevator to Christian's apartment, knowing that no matter how loyal the copper-haired man was to Raymond, he would first try to help Jose find the missing girl. He couldn't really explain why he felt that Christian was his best friend when he had known other people for longer, and when there were still so many things he didn't share with him. Maybe it was the way Christian would always wait for Jose to come in his own time, or the way he would always make sure that Jose was comfortable. Maybe it was because the both of them had shitty childhoods and had to learn to survive, or maybe it was because Jose admired Christian for surviving so much better than him.

Once in front of Christian's apartment, Jose used the spare key the man had given him to let himself in, and the first thing he noticed was that Christian was nowhere to be seen. For as long as he had known him, Jose had never even heard of Christian sleeping in, he knew that Christian was a night owl and an early bird at the same time. So he had been expecting to find Christian having breakfast, or relaxing in his living-room. But then again, maybe Christian was in the shower, or worst sick.

This was an odd thing about Christian, he was never sick. Jose had never known him to have a fever, or to get a cold or even a stomachache. But he always placed that under the fact that Christian was a freak of nature. He barely slept, and yet, he never suffered from sleep deprivation. And he didn't know any sort of addiction. Whether it was something hard and illegal as drugs, something sociably acceptable as alcohol or coffee or cigarettes, or something subtle as sugar, Christian always lived without including any of those substance in his life. Even when it came to sex, he wasn't that interested in the matter, more interested in the relief that it procured than in the act itself. Jose even wondered if Christian had ever masturbated.

Jose often joked to Christian that he was a vegan diet away from being a robot, because nobody could be that healthy in life.

But as he got upstairs, Jose didn't hear a noise from the shower, comforting him in the idea that Christian might be sick, and therefore unable to help him in his hunt for Ana. He opened the door, his mouth already opened to apologise for barging in like that, when he got face to face with Christian.

Relief washed over Jose when he saw that Christian was all but in good health, though his hair clearly indicated he just got out of bed. Jose glanced at the bed, where he saw a sleeping form. He was about to tease Christian for being human for once when he saw _who_ was in the bed.

For a second, he tried to find a reasonable explanation that would explain what _Anastasia Steele _was doing in _Christian Grey_'s bed. Maybe she had been really sick and had gone to Christian, unable to make it back home. Maybe Christian had called Raymond to let him know about his daughter's whereabouts, and the two of them forgot to let Jose know as well.

But Jose's false hopes all died when he saw Ana's bra strap on her shoulders. He glanced around, seeing her clothes alongside with Christian's rumpled on a chair. And of course, there was the fact that Christian was shirtless, with his tousled hair, just coming out of bed when this was so unusual of him.

When Jose regained possession of his voice and of his heartbeat, he stated the most obvious thing in the world, "_You're a dead man_!"

"Shhh! Keep your voice down!" Christian ushered, as if the most important thing at this instant was the volume of his voice.

Jose watched Christian with disbelief, not really believing his eyes and ears at this moment. He watched Christian glancing behind him, assuring himself that the brunette was still sleeping before he closed the door and indicated Jose that whatever conversation they would have, they should have it downstairs.

So the two men went to the living room, Christian clearly more relaxed than Jose about the situation, going to the kitchen space to pour himself a glass of water. Jose waited for the man to explain homself, but when it became clear that he had no intentions of doing so, he accused him,

"Of _all_ the girls in this fucking city, Christian, you had to fuck _Raymond's daughter_? Do you want to die? Do you want _me_ to die?"

Christian rose an eyebrow at him before leaning against his sink and drinking his water. "Why would you die? Just don't tell Raymond."

"_You_ want to keep secrets from Raymond?"

Of all the things that had happened in this morning, _this_ was the least believable thing. Jose could understand that Christian and Ana had fallen into bed, they were both attractive people. Jose could understand that Ana hadn't wanted her best friend to know of this one nightstand. Jose could understand that neither of them thought they would get caught since Jose was in the building to pick up Ana earlier than he should. But what he could not understand or even believe was Christian willingly keeping secrets from Raymond. Especially something like that.

Christian crossed his arms over his chest, looking slightly conflicted. But that expression barely lasted a second. Then, he rose an eyebrow at Jose, interrogating him, "What are you doing here, Jose?"

"I came to ask you to help me look for _her_!"

"Keep your voice down," Christian gritted between his teeth, glancing in direction of the stairs. He waited a little to see if the brunette had been awaken by their voices, and when it became evident that she was still sleeping, Christian returned his focus on Jose who did not forget about his line of questioning.

"Christian! Are we going to talk about the fact that you just fucked our _boss's daughter_?! You know, the man owning this city! The man owning the mob we work for!"

"_Your voice_, Jose!" Christian ushered, but all Jose could do was glare at the copper-haired man. He couldn't believe that he was more worried about waking up the girl upstairs than of the consequences of having that said brunette upstairs, in the first place.

"We didn't have sex yesterday night if that's what you're worried about. We met in the elevator, she came up, and we fell asleep whilst talking."

Jose rubbed his forehead, trying to make a sense of all of it, but things didn't add up, and there was this constant threat that was looming over him. If Raymond knew that Christian fooled around with his daughter, Jose knew that he would be caught in the problem. Ana was his responsibility when she wasn't at the mansion, and Jose hadn't known and informed his boss about something so important.

But as Jose was trying to calm himself and understand what was happening, something Christian said lit a bulb in his head. "What do you mean, 'yesterday night'? How long has this been going on?"

Christian didn't say anything, his face unreadable and void of expressions before a slight frown rumpled his face. "Isn't it a bit early for you to come pick her up? It's barely nine, and you usually come around eleven…"

"I was in the area," Jose eluded, but it didn't make Christian drop the issue as he had hoped.

"And Katherine Kavanagh told you that Ana was at my place this morning?" Christian asked with a small smirk, as if he already knew the truth, which made Jose play safe, and stay the closest to the truth as possible.

"No. Ethan was on his way out when I came and he told me that Ana texted Katherine to let her know that she wasn't feeling well and therefore not coming."

"Ethan? I didn't know you were on first name bases with the Kavanaghs," Christian countered, and Jose realised his mistake. Still, he didn't let Christian stray him away from the main topic.

"Why are we even talking about me? Don't avoid my questions, Christian. Why did I found Ana in your bed?"

Christian glanced to the stairs, as if he was making a decision, and just as he did so, Jose decided that he was ready to believe whatever lie he would be fed with. If he believed the lie, he wouldn't have to feel bad or guilty about anything. All Christian had to do was lie about the real reason their boss's daughter was in his apartment.

But of course, it was Christian Jose was dealing with. "Because we had a lot to talk about, and I wanted to sleep with her in my arms," He truthfully said, making Jose whimper at this truth he wasn't ready to hear, nor that he wanted to hear, for that matter.

"Why did you tell me that? _Why didn't you lie_? You knew I would have bought anything!"

Christian furrowed his brows, probably confused that Jose would suggest him to lie, before he told him, "Because you're my best friend, and you asked me a direct question. If you didn't want the honest answer, you should have asked another kind of question."

Jose passed his hand over his face before he started pacing throughout Christian's living room, whilst Christian observed him from the kitchen space. He was trying to understand how Christian could be so calm when Raymond was famous for his short temper concerning his daughter's suitors. And he was trying to understand how Christian could even _think_ of keeping this secret from Raymond. This idea was going against everything Christian was to his very being.

And suddenly, he understood. "It's not your secret to share."

"No, it's not."

Jose looked at his best friend, seeing him differently as he uttered those words. Never in his life, he would have thought that Christian would break his most sacred rule for someone who wasn't Raymond Steele. His loyalty to Raymond meant everything to Christian, and now, Christian was ready to put it in danger for someone else.

"Christian …"

"I'll never ask you to lie for me, Jose. But it's _my_ head that's at stake. No matter what, I won't bring you into this. I'll accept whatever consequences will come to me, in time, as long as their only repercussions are on me."

Jose didn't say a word for a while, understanding would Raymond learn about Ana and his best man, Christian would take to the grave the fact that Jose had known about them. He could also see why Ana didn't want her father to know about Christian. Raymond wasn't known to like any male around Ana that wasn't him.

He finally stopped pacing and leaned against the sofa, facing Christian as he asked, "So … How did _it_ happen, if yesterday night wasn't your first time together?"

Christian smirked, turning so he could pour himself another glass of water all the while informing his friend, "I took your word a little too seriously when you told me to enjoy myself in Japan."

Jose couldn't hold the chuckle that came out of him, shaking his head a little. "You know, she has had a crush on you at some point. She and Katherine."

"I know, she told me."

Jose bit the inside of his cheek, wanting to say something more, but not sure of how Christian would take it. He didn't want his best friend thinking that he was trying to talk him out of anything, but there were still things he felt he needed to say, for both their peace of mind.

"Christian … You know Raymond. You should tell him before he finds out. Raymond _always_ finds out. And he will have your head for touching his daughter, and your soul for betraying him."

Christian looked down on the floor, lost in his thoughts before he looked back at Jose with a glimpse of tortured sadness in his eyes. But of course, like every time Christian started showing his emotions, he masked his feelings before they could be properly seen.

"I can't, Jose. I made a promise. So it would appear that it is a risk I'm willing to take."

Jose nodded, and walked toward the front door, informing the man, "I will be in front of the building at midday sharp to pick up Ana. Don't make me come back inside the building."

Then he left the apartment, his mind troubled with the version of Christian that he just saw. And the more he thought about it, the more resolved he was on making sure that Raymond would never find out about Christian. Because he loved Christian, and knew that Raymond would punish this sort of betrayal. Because he didn't want his best friend to suddenly go missing. Because Christian's smile when he said that he knew about Ana's crush was something that he had never seen before.

.

‼️**PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP**‼️

**.~~. .~~. .~~.**

**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**

‼️**NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE IN ANOTHER POV**‼️

**(If you can guess who's point-of-view it will be, you get a sneak peek, once again)**

**.**

**~ So this was a chapter where we learnt a bit more about Jose and Ethan. It is a couple who is going to be ... well, I think they will be a very beautiful couple. So be prepared to have a few more Jose's point-of-view, and maybe one or two from Ethan ... We shall see ...**

**~ There are a few hints in this chapter, but I think it is too early for you to pick up on them. They will make sense in a few chapters though. But if you picked up on those hints, do let me know. I think they are obvious, but that's because I am writing the story, so maybe they aren't that obvious.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**What do you think of the Ethan and Jose we had?**

**What do you think of Jose's last words?**

** How do you feel about the conversation Christian and Jose had?**

** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

** What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Guest1: **_Well, as you see, it wasn't Ray_

**Guest2x: **_So, it really was Jose, but I couldn't send you the next peek. Hope you liked it though. _

**Love, Mina**


	12. Chapter 11: Girls Time

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

** 💚 So Elliott finally comes in the story, and he is very different than the one from the books. It is needed for the story, but as I said, this story is extremely Out Of Characters**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 11****: Girls Time(6,6K)**

‼️**PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP**‼️

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Katherine's point-of-view**

**Sorry about yesterday night. I'll explain all about it. I'll be at your door in about fifteen minutes. Shopping? Ana**

Kate looked down at her phone, twisting a little her mouth to the side before she went to her bathroom to get ready to go out. She was still rather annoyed that her best friend had bailed on her the night before because she had some glorious news to share with her. But she knew her best friend, and she knew that Ana wouldn't have cancelled her plans with her, without some good reasons.

She suspected that those reasons were a guy, but that didn't really fit, because Kate wasn't aware of Ana seeing any guy. And even though Ana was definitely more liberal than her in that area, she still never had been the kind of girl to have one-night stands. Ana was in love with the idea of love. She liked to think that someone who wasn't family could think of her out of nowhere, or surprise her just to make her happy. Like she would often tell Kate, Ana liked the idea that there might be an Elliot waiting for her, somewhere out there. She just had to seek him out.

Elliot was Kate's boyfriend ever since they were in school. He was actually her first boyfriend, her first kiss, her first love, her first time, just like she was his. He was Ana's best friend and she was Ana's best friend, and ultimately, they ended up together. Ana often joked, saying that their love story was already written in the stars and that she was the instrument of fate that brought them together.

And mostly, Kate thought that Elliot was the most handsome man there was. Sure, she had her fair share of crushes over other guys, sometimes guys that worked for her Uncle, but she had never been serious about them. Those crushes were like the celebrity crushes she had, just some good looking guys to look at. But Elliot ... Elliot was different.

On more than one occasion, Ana told Kate that she couldn't see what her friend was seeing in the guy, but it was still there for Kate. If there was one thing she could call flaw about Elliot, it was the fact that she would be taller than him when she would wear heels (which was most of the time). She loved his hair, especially when he hadn't cut it in a while, and it was full of adorable curls. She loved his clear eyes, especially when he was reading or writing, and that he put on his roundish glasses. She loved his jaw, especially since he always had a thin layer of beard shading it. She simply loved Elliot.

And everyone in Kate's family loved Elliot, just like Elliot's family loved Kate. He was coming from a background much different than hers with a family who earned much less than hers, but Elliot never really looked at her that way. The only reason they ended up in the same school was because Elliot's father was a teacher at that said school, which allowed the Lewis's to afford putting their child in such a fancy school, with the discount working for it provided.

But Elliot never brought up that his parents were making less money than Kate's. He didn't judge when Kate said she didn't want to go to college, but he did. He didn't argue with her when she told him she would rather keep living near her parents when he proposed that they should live together on campus. He simply loved her as she was, no matter how difficult she could get.

Kate knew that her refusal to move in with him had had a toll on Elliot because it might have seemed that she didn't want to take their relationship to the next level, but it had been mostly because she was scared. She wasn't like Elliot, she didn't know anything about living on her own, let alone living with someone depending on her at some level.

Her mother had understood her concerns, and she enrolled them in weekly cooking classes. She also stopped caring for her daughter's bills, letting Kate handle them on her own, and told the house cleaning to no longer pass by Kate's apartment. Elena had told Kate that living with somebody wasn't something that she could teach her daughter, but she could give her some tools to make that life easier.

Of course, all that worry was no longer a concern to Kate. Soon enough, she would have to live with Elliot, ready or not.

With a smile she looked at her reflexion in the mirror, pondering if she should put on some eyeliner or not, before she decided against it, going for a bold red lipstick and a fresh French look. Then, she left her bathroom, putting her now most precious possession on her finger and waiting for Ana to ring at her bell. Which she did barely a minute afterwards.

Kate leaped to the front door, opening the door to her best friend who was brightly smiling at her. She didn't give Ana time to say anything that she was already presenting her with her left hand, showing her the beautiful ring ornamenting her fourth finger. Ana grabbed Kate's hand her fingers, bringing the ring closer to her eyes, before she started screaming out of joy.

"Haaaa! _Finally_! When did he propose? I thought he was out of town? Did you already plan a date? Is Aunt Elena excited? Is he going to move in? Can I plan your bachelorette party? How many strippers are we talking? Do you thin—"

"Breath, Ana," Kate instructed, retaking possession of her hand whilst a smile crept on her face.

Ana had been going on and on for a couple of years that she should already be an Aunty since it was obvious that Elliot and Kate were meant for each other, and that they had been together for years. She was most enthusiast and vehement at the idea of her favourite couple married and pregnant. Especially the pregnant part. Even if they were still rather young.

"And anyway, it's not official yet," Kate explained, as she took off the ring and put it in her purse.

She had put it on only for Ana to see, and to get a reaction from her. And the reaction was exactly what she had expected of her best friend. She closed the door, and the two of them went to the elevator with Ana being completely beat down by this new piece of information.

"What do you mean, it's not official? I have had my bridesmaid speech ready for almost half a decade! Elliot _can't_ do that to me. What reason does he have to chicken out, now that he actually popped the question?!"

"He's being old-fashioned. He said that he doesn't want me to tell Dad before he gets a chance to properly ask for my hand. I don't know if I should find this romantic, or if I should get offended that he needs to ask my Dad first."

Ana thought about it as they exited the elevator, before she let her friend know her point-of-view, "I think it's romantic. Because in the end, he asked _you_ first. He's just following some silly tradition, and I'm sure Uncle Eamon would love that. Maybe he will even tear up a bit at the idea of giving away his only daughter. I wish I could be there to see that."

Kate rolled her eyes at Ana's words, though she was sure that Ana was right to some extent. Eamon loved all three of his children equally but had always been more lenient toward Kate, even if she wasn't the youngest.

They walked to the white Mercedes where Jose was waiting for them, and once they climbed in, Ana asked, "You don't mind taking us shopping, do you, Jose? Kate and I have a lot to celebrate."

The man simply nodded, closing the door behind Ana before taking place behind the wheel, and Ana turned her head to Kate, resuming the conversation about Kate's upcoming plans.

"So? When is the date?"

"Well, as I said, nothing is official. But I'd like it to be April the 29th, so it would coincide with our eight years anniversary."

Ana furrowed a bit her brows before she told Kate, "Your Mom won't be really happy about this. Six months to get your wedding ready is a short time. Plus Elain is probably going to complain that she didn't get to fatten you up enough before the wedding."

Both girls laughed because no matter how open and modern Elliot's mother was, she was still a stereotype of the Jew mother when it came to food. No one seemed to eat enough if you listened to her, not even her husband. still, neither her or her husband minded that Kate was not a Jew, and more than happy to see their son so in love with her.

For the rest of the way, the two girls joked about how nobody would be able to get to the dance floor if Elain was in charge of the food at the wedding, because despite always insisting that people should eat five times their fill, Elain was a darn right good cook.

Once they arrived in the shopping centre, the girls wandered off, not really paying attention to Jose, but all the while knowing he wasn't far behind. They were used to it since this had been their routine for all their lives. Routine that Elliot had never adjusted to.

As they passed a jewellery store, Ana wondered out loud, "I wonder if the ring is an heirloom?"

"I don't know. I don't think so, or Elliot would have mentioned it at some point."

"The ring seemed quite expensive. And Elliot is still a veterinary student. He doesn't have a big loaded family behind him to back him up on that sort of jewellery. This looks like the kind of ring _Ethan_ could buy, not Elliot."

Kate furrowed her brows, realising that she didn't think of it. She just thought of what the ring meant, and that she felt it was perfect for her. But it was a silver ring, ornamented with diamonds and a big ass sapphire in the middle that echoed her eyes. Which meant that Elliot probably had to make a loan to buy such a ring.

Ana seemed to pick up on the trail of thoughts Kate was heading towards, because she told her, "Don't sweat it. That's what guys in love do. They do crazy things to make their girls happy. If you want to make him happy, do something back. Though knowing Elliot, a blowjob would be plenty enough."

Kate bumped in her friend's shoulder, shaking her head as Ana wiggled her eyebrows at her. She knew that Ana would never let go of the fact that she walked in on Elliot being orally pleasured by Kate, both of them stark naked and on the breach of orgasm. All she could hope for was that Ana would not dare bring this up on their wedding ... Though knowing Ana, she would probably find a way to do so, subtly enough to only embarrass Elliot and her.

"Anyway, enough about me. How about you? Where were you la—"

"Not now," Ana cut her off, glancing behind them at Jose.

Kate frowned, but kept her mouth shut, understanding that Ana didn't want Jose (and therefore her father) to know about her whereabouts. So they kept on shopping, both already planning the romantic and extravagant wedding to come. Though Kate wanted something intimate, she still wanted her marriage to be somehow grandiose. She wanted the white princess dress, and the expensive champagne (she always had a weakness for champagne), she wanted the flowers by thousands and the luxurious food.

They only stopped talking about the wedding when they entered into the lingerie shop Journelle, where Jose simply waited by the entry of the shop. No matter how discreet and silent he could get, he seemed to have always a code of never entering a lingerie shop with the girls, and they never figured out if it was out of respect for them, or it was simply because he was embarrassed of being in such a shop.

As soon as they were alone, Kate pressed her best friend for explanations, "So, why did you ditch me yesterday night?"

Ana looked through the different cheeky's on the racket in front of her as she said, as if nothing, "Well, I stumbled upon this guy yesterday night on my way up, and ... Well, I _really_ wanted to spend the night with him. It was actually my only chance to have a moment with him, so I jumped on it."

Kate stared at her friend, dumbfounded by what she was hearing. This didn't sound like Ana. Even though Ana and Kate were different in the whole boyfriend-area, Kate knew that Ana would never have a one-nightstand. She liked the idea of love too much to intimately engage with a guy she couldn't have a relationship with. Of course, there had been that Pedro guy with whom Ana stayed six months with, although she knew that nothing would ever come out of their relationship but sex, but at least they had a relationship.

But then, Kate focused on another part of Ana's sentence that was just as disturbing, if not more than Ana having a one night hook-up. She said that she had been on her way up, which meant she met the guy in Kate's building.

"_You had a one-nightstand with one of my neighbours_?!"

"No! I ... Well ..." Ana seemed to hesitate, and when Kate saw in the blue eyes of her best friend that she was about to lie to her, she stubbornly crossed her arms over her chest, silently forcing the brunette to spill her dirty secret.

"Well, the thing is ... and you can't tell anyone! Not even Ethan, or Elliot, and _especially_ not your Mom!"

"I won't," Kate assured, relaxing as she waited for her friend to narrate the tale of her previous night.

"I mean it, Kate! You can't tell a living should about it. Swear it!"

"I swear," Kate pledged, uselessly bringing up two of her fingers as scouts would do it, even though none of the girls ever gotten the pleasure to live wildly in the forest with other little girls their age.

"I was with Christian," Ana whispered, before pretending to be interested in an emerald bustier.

Kate rushed to her side, not sure if she heard the name properly, because that particular name was ... impossible.

"Christian? As in _Christian_ Christian?"

"Yes."

"How ... Wh ... Ana, this doesn't make sense!" Kate exclaimed, not understanding how Ana could have ended up in Christian's bed.

She didn't personally know Christian, but she knew he worked for her Uncle, and that he was to become Raymond's successor in his shares of the Robinson Company. She also knew that he lived on the top floor of her building, and that, according to her father, he was extremely loyal to Raymond. Which was only confirmed by Ana many times over as she complained more than once that Christian was like her father's shadow.

This exact attitude lead to a drunken night just before her trip to Japan, when Ana listed everything that was wrong about the character of Christian Grey, and how he was going to ruin her time there, and how his only redeeming quality was his good looks. Ana didn't like how loyal Christian was to her father, because she knew she wouldn't be able to bribe him. She did bribe Jose a couple of times for him to let Kate and her have a wild night out, promising to keep in touch with him if something went wrong. But Christian would be too inflexible to bribe like that.

Ana deeply breathed in, before she stopped looking at the different lingeries displayed and looked right in her friend's blue eyes.

"Well ... And you have no rights to judge. I was very very horny, and not thinking clearly due to jet lag.

So, when we were in Japan, I might have slipped to Christian that I had a crush on him. And I might have kissed him. And I might have invited him to my bed, with the arrangement that this would be a thing for the next couple of weeks. And I might have extended the trip a week longer because I wanted to stay with him ...

And ... well ... I might have missed him over the past couple of months, since we got back."

"_Ana_!" Kate admonished. "The guy is working for your father! I don't know if it's even legal! He could sue you for sexual harassment."

Ana slyly chuckled, making Kate squint her eyes at her as she pointed out, "Especially knowing you and how you like talking about sex!"

The brunette didn't seem to see the problem, her sly smile still on her lips as she said, "Well, there is _a lot_ to talk about. I mean, even porn stars don't have that kind of cocks, and I have seen plenty of fat porn cocks!"

Kate gave a stern look at her best friend, not amused by her innuendos; but Ana only smirked, wiggling her eyebrows at Kate as she added. "I'm serious, Kate. Good thing he's _really_ into foreplay, because that thing could tear me in half. Though I'm clearly not complaining, I got to try new _exciting_ positions."

"That big?" Kate asked, resigned on trying to make her friend see the bigger picture at this moment. She would try again later, but she was curious. Ana seemed to think about it for a moment, before she told her friend,

"Remember when we went to that farm in the countryside with your family? Remember that salami that knocked Ethan because he was walking round without paying attention? Well, here you have the monster-cock."

"Monster-cock?" Kate laughed at the name, and Ana grimaced, returning her attention on the lingerie on front of them.

"Yeah ... Christian isn't very for of the nickname. Maybe I should call it _The Rock,_ since they are both massive, impressive and bald."

"Yeah, because nothing turns a guy more than knowing that the girl in his bed is calling his dick by another guy's name. _Especially_ when that other guy is The Rock," Kate sarcastically retorted, rolling her eyes at Ana's stupid statements.

Sometimes, she wondered if her father's overprotectiveness didn't cut Ana away from the reality of life. Ana never let herself fall deep into a relationship because she knew her father would intervene in it, and not in her favour. But there were also the times when Ana didn't seem to see the world as Kate did, and Kate knew that she was far from being average. She knew that her mother didn't have an easy life, which lead to her cutting her children from some harsh realities, but it was nothing compared to Raymond.

Raymond loved Ana, there was no doubts in that. But he also put her in a bubble in which he didn't let anyone in. One could argue that he did the same with Christian, since it seemed that Raymond was taking the young man everywhere he would go, keeping him away from experiencing life outside of work.

"What about your Dad? Does he want to share Christian?" She questioned, though her eyes were set on a red babydoll ensemble. Elliot loved the colour vibrant red on her.

"My Dad doesn't know, and he's never going to know. Christian promised me yesterday night to keep this between him and I. So you can't tell anyone. Not even Elliot, because we both know that he's —"

"a blabbering drunk," Kate finished with her, more than aware of her fiancé's poor lack of control when alcohol was in his system.

Ana looked at the piece of lingerie Kate was holding in front of her, assessing it, before she let her friend know, "Elliot is going to eat you up in that."

"Elliot is going to eat me up, even if I wear a potato bag," Kate sighed, though she kept the ensemble. The two girls exchanged a knowing smile before they went to the bustier aisle, and Kate inquired,

"Is it really worth it, though? I mean, I get that you might like the sex, Ana, but —"

"It's not just about the sex. Sure, the sex is _awesome_, but ... I don't know. I just feel myself around him. Probably because he already knows everything there is to know about me and my father, so I don't have to worry that he's after the money, or that he'll runaway when he'll know who's my Dad. I mean, he knew from the start.

And I don't have to worry that he's in it just for the sex either, because ... Knowing how loyal he is to Dad, he wouldn't go risk all of that for just a hookup. I know he wanted to tell Dad when we got back from Japan, and he didn't for me. I don't know, Kate. I just like being with him, and ... well why not try it?"

"Why would Christian agree to not telling your father? Isn't he in love with him, or something?"

Ana rolled her eyes, picking a black and pink bustier as she nonchalantly murmured, "More like the other way around. After all, Christian is the son who doesn't talk back and does everything asked."

"Ana," Kate said with a compassionate voice, putting a friendly hand on her friend's shoulder. Ana shook her head, erasing any trace of nostalgia from her face before she had a boost of confidence and told her friend,

"It is true. But that's beside the point. Now you know why I didn't come yesterday night. Christian and I talked things out. We decided to try, meaning that we are exclusive and we will see where it will take us."

"So what does that mean, that you are a couple, without being a couple?"

"No. It just means that ... we are in a relationship that my father won't get his hands on. I mean, I'd like to for once have a boyfriend that lasts more than three months. Do I need to remind you how Richard ghosted me not even a week after we started getting to something serious? I just ... want what we had in Japan back."

The two girls walked to the cashier with their purchases, Kate not having the heart anymore to argue with her friend. In her point-of-view, this relationship was doomed from the start. She couldn't picture Christian (as little as she knew him) as the kind of guy who committed to lasting relationships, and she couldn't picture Ana falling in love with someone who was so much like her father. But then again, Ana was right, why not enjoy it whilst it lasted?

"So, he's the one who put the exclusivity rule," Kate assumed as she gave the cashier her items. She didn't know much about guys and relationships, but she knew that any guy with a little brain would like to stake his claim on someone as gorgeous as Ana.

"No, I did. Honesty, Kate, how stupid do you think I am? He travels a lot, and he's smocking hot. And it's not because we're not a couple that it means I want him to see other women when I'm not around."

"And what did he say?"

Ana grimaced, taking her bags before they walked to he exit of the shop. "He laughed at me and kissed my forehead as if I were a child."

Kate smiled at Ana narrowing her eyes as she recalled Christian's actions of the night before, and they stopped talking about the past night as soon as they were out of the shop.

Jose joined the girls, clearly relieved that they were finally out of the shop and making Kate realise that they did stay for a rather long time. Ana didn't say anything about that, and looked at the time, before she proposed dinner to her friend, which Kate eagerly accepted. She hadn't had lunch, and it was already six in the afternoon. She was starving.

Jose drove them to The Mile High, a restaurant that Raymond had owned before gifting it to Ethan, and the two girls ate together whilst the Hispanic man told them that he would be waiting for them in the car. Kate didn't say much about it, even though she knew that Ana didn't like having her bodyguards act so much like ... bodyguards.

They barely had their plates served that a shadow came to their table, making both girls brightly smile when they saw to whom it belonged.

"Uncle Ray! What a surprise!" Kate exclaimed, getting up to embrace her Godfather.

Raymond was the Godfather for her and her two brothers, but the three of them had always called him Uncle. He was their mother's oldest friend, and had always spoiled his godchildren rotten, not that any of them ever complained. He was that friendly uncle every kid ever dreamt of, the one to run off to when parents were mad at them. But it wasn't the principal reason why Kate and her brothers loved Ana's father. She couldn't tell what it was precisely, given the fact that she didn't know much about him, but she knew that she could always count on him.

"Jose told me that you were having dinner here. Maybe you'd like to join us?"

"Us?" Ana inquired, her eyebrow up, and making Raymond smile with fondness at his daughter.

"It's a business diner," He specified. Ana rose her eyebrow even higher, silently asking her father how he could think that she would come to his table, when he knew perfectly well how much she disliked being stuck in that kind of diners.

Raymond slightly shook his head, before pointing their plates with his chin and saying, "We already finished our main course, so you should just eat your dinner and join us when desert comes. We will stop talking about business the second you will sit with us."

Then, he left the two girls to eat their food, and they talked some more about Kate's upcoming wedding. They were trying to figure out where would the ceremony would be best celebrated. Kate, being romantic as she was wanted to do it in Central Park, where Elliot first kissed her, when she was young and innocent. But Ana argued that Central Park wouldn't be practical because of the amount of undesired people that would be around.

They were still at an impasse when they finished eating, and decided to put the conversation on hold before joining Ana's father. And as Kate expected it, they found Raymond at a secluded table, sitting with Christian, and another man.

The three men got up with gallantry when they approached the table, and Ana sat between her father and the unknown man, whilst Kate sat in front of her, between Christian and the new man.

"Paul, let me introduce you to my daughter, Clarissa and her best friend, Katherine Kavanagh. Girls, this is Paul Clayton."

The two girls politely smiled at the man and the whole table looked down at the desert menu that was given to them. From the corner of her eye, Kate saw that Christian barely looked at his, and swiftly put it back on the table, but she didn't think much of it. She looked through her menu, and made her choice as soon as she saw that there was strawberry pie. Strawberries were her weakness, anyone who knew her knew that.

The waiter came to take their order, Raymond and Ana laughing at her when Kate unsurprisingly ordered the strawberry pie; and once alone, Ana turned her head to the man who was on a business meeting with her father,

"So Paul, what brings you in New York?"

"I'm a native New Yorker. I was just out of the city for my studies," He said all smiles to Ana, and Kate slightly narrowed her eyes at that.

The man was quite nice to look at. Strawberry-blond tidy hair with a very well groomed beard shading his angular face. His eyes were icy blue and playful. But it wasn't much the way he looked at Ana that made Kate think twice. It was his attitude. He was a charmer, and confident in himself, which was probably a very good quality when you had to handle a business. But the way he smiled at Ana made Kate think that he would clearly not mind charming her in a way more personal than how he just tried to charm her father.

"And why did you come back to New York? What does New York have that you didn't have where you did your studies?"

"Well, for starters, DC doesn't have beautiful women such as yourself," Paul boldly answered with an inviting smile. Ana politely gave him back his smile, and he continued, "And now, you're giving me yet another reason to want to make New York a better place."

Ana glanced at Kate, half rolling her eyes as she realised that Paul was a politician. Ana hated politicians because 'no matter what, they always found a way to screw you with a beautiful smile'. At least businessmen openly screwed you over. The two girls exchanged a look, but Raymond curtly cut down any more attempts coming from Paul to try to openly flirt with his daughter just right in front of him.

"So, Kate. How is Elliot?" He strongly asked, though his eyes were hard and cold on Paul.

"He's doing fine. He's gone to LA for the week to some veterinary conference about dying species. He was really excited about it. Apparently it will help with his thesis."

Raymond finally tore his gaze away from Paul, who had the humility to look embarrassed, and he glanced at Kate's hands. It was only for a brief second, but she could swear that she saw surprise when his eyes landed on her fingers. And just like that, though he didn't say a word, Kate knew that Raymond knew about the proposal. She couldn't tell how he knew, but she was used to it. Her Godfather _always_ knew everything, Ana repeated her that enough times for her to try to doubt it.

When their deserts where served, they all made small talks about trivial things such as the weather, or the upcoming shows that were coming to Broadway. But during that little hour she spent sitting next to Christian, Kate got to inspect him from a closer look.

The first thing she noticed was the fact that he didn't take any desert. Fact that neither Raymond or Ana seemed intrigued about, when they all took consequent deserts. Kate was actually surprised that Ana didn't make a remark about it, knowing how much her best friend liked deserts, and how she could never understand that someone would not splurge in that little sweet indulgence.

Then, though it took her a whilst to notice it, Kate noted that Christian did not utter a single word, all throughout desert. And this time, she was surprised that Raymond didn't even try to bring Christian in the diverse conversations that had been brought on. It even seemed that Raymond was used to Christian being silent and observant like that.

But what Kate paid most attention to was the way Christian reacted to Ana. And if Ana hadn't told her all about them, she never would have guessed. Christian was acting toward Ana the same way he acted toward her. Even when Paul have blatantly flirted with Ana just in front of him, Christian had been unreadable (unlike Raymond who didn't try to hide his dislike of the situation).

When diner finally came to an end, Raymond informed the girls that Jose had gone home a while ago, and he proposed to drop Kate back to her apartment. They all walked to the limousine, and once the four of them were in the back, the girls in front of the men, Kate put on her best puppy face and asked,

"You don't mind if Ana stays with me tonight again, right Uncle Val?"

Raymond chuckled, before swiftly glancing at his daughter as if assessing something about her. "I guess you have much to discuss about with Elliot being away."

Ana narrowed her eyes to her father, daring him to say anything more about the matter, but Raymond simply looked out the window with a smirk on his face. They remained silent for a moment, before Raymond announced,

"I'm going to Vegas this weekend, by the way."

And finally Christian had his first reaction of the night. He turned a surprised head to Raymond, apparently learning about the trip. Raymond looked at his daughter who simply shrugged. So he turned to Kate and informed her,

"Your mother is coming with me. But don't worry, I'll get her back to you before Elliot comes back from the conference."

_Yes, he definitely knows_. She thought, not the slightest worried that her mother was going to Vegas with Raymond. The two of them had known each other for so long that one could even call them brother and sister.

"When are we leaving?" Christian asked, and Raymond returned his focus to the window, telling Christian,

"You're not coming with me, this time. I'm going for personal business, and it's not something I'm ready to share with you, yet."

Christian didn't show any emotions at those words, but Ana did. She narrowed her eyes at her father, and bluntly asked, "What personal business do you have in Vegas that includes Aunt Elena?"

"Like I said, it's personal," Raymond responded with a smile. But of course Ana being Ana didn't take it as closure for the conversation.

"You know, people going to Vegas and not wanting their family to know what they are up to, are usually up to no good ... Are you going to get married there? Is it why your bringing Aunt Elena? To be your best man?"

"_What? No_! Why would you ... It has nothing to do with that, Ana. It's just ... complicated."

Kate looked embarrassedly at her hands on her knees, wishing that she hadn't been crossed in that crossfire between father and daughter. She knew that there were a lot of unresolved issues between the two of them concerning Ana's mother, but she also knew that the both of them still hadn't mourn properly Carla. She had seen Ana cry every year on her mother's death anniversary, especially after Mike. But Elena had also told her daughter that Raymond was still devastated by his wife's death, no matter how many years had passed since then.

The rest of the ride was done in utter silence, and Kate saw how Christian glanced a couple of times from Raymond to Ana. It wasn't much that his face was saying anything about what he was thinking, but she could tell that there was something he would have said if he hadn't been working for Raymond. Or if he hadn't started a relationship with Ana, she couldn't quite tell.

Once in front of their building, Christian kept the door opened for the two girls, before swiftly leaning his head on the limousine to tell something to Raymond. Then, the three of them went to the elevator in silent, and Kate wondered if she should go on with her plan or not. After all, she wasn't supposed to know anything. But then again, if Christian were to make a scene because Ana shared this secret with her best friend, it was best for them to stop now.

So when they reached her floor, she quickly got out of the elevator and pushed Ana back in, winking at her and giving her the opportunity to spend one more night with Christian.

‼️**PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP**‼️

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So I know this chapter might seem like filler, but it is not. It physically introduced Paul, and showed Christian from another point-of-view to see how he is, and not what he thinks, it showed Ana's point-of-view without revealing all of it, and it showed another facet of Raymond. Plus, though the Kate/Elliott plotline won't be very important/interesting (yeah, I'm trashing my own story), it is rather necessary for the story to go on. Because ... hints. (Yeah, I know, you hate me with those hints) Haha.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What do you think of Kate in this story? I know, Kate is OOC, like most of the characters in this story.**

💚**What do you think of the relationship between the two girls?**

💚** How do you feel about Paul Clayton?**

💚** What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

_,_

**Guest1: **_Well I will update the story tonight or tomorrow. It will be quite a looooooong chapter, haha._

**Guest2: **_Thank you ^^_

**Guest3: **_Before the end of the month, for sure_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	13. Chapter 12: La Valse A Mille Temps

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

** 💚 So for those who think that the POV from other characters are just fillers and not necessary, they are VERY important for the story. Foreshadowing is something I like to play with, and the two characters have evoked things that are crucial to the plot of this story, and wouldn't have been shown if I simply put this in Christian's POV. Moreover, we got to see Christian in different POVs. From someone who knew him well, and from someone who didn't know him at all. And Kate allowed us to know a bit more about Ana ...**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 12: La**** Valse A Mille Temps ****(7,6K)**

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**💚So in this chapter, there is the mention of two French songs, and I am sorry to tell you, but you have to do a little research on one of them. It is called ****_La Valse A Mille Temps_ ****Jacques Brel, and due to copyrights policy, I can't put the translation here. If you go to musixmatch translation, you might have a somewhat correct translation, but since the lyrics play with words, you will definitely miss some subtlety on that song. You need to read the lyrics, and hear the song, to understand a scene playing in this chapter. ESPECIALLY since this song will be a recurring song for our couple‼️**

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**Heartbreaker - Patrick Benatar**

**La Valse À Mille Temps - Jacques Brel **

**La Foule - Edith Piaf**

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**Christian's PoV**

"So … I told Kate," Ana said, though she did not turn to face him.

Christian repressed a smile, not bothered by that fact. If he were honest with himself, he was actually enjoying the fact that he would get to spend an unexpected night with the brunette in his arms. Moreover, he never thought that Ana would be able to keep a secret that big from her best friend. She wasn't trained to keep secrets, unlike him.

"I figured," He simply told her, and when she finally turned to face him, he had a small smile for her, making her blink with disbelief.

"You're not mad at me?"

"You're the one who came up with that rule, not me," He eluded.

It wasn't that he was actually mad at her, because he clearly wasn't. But he wasn't actually really thrilled about keeping whatever there was between them, between them. There was first and foremost the idea of lying to Raymond that he strongly disliked, but there was also the fact that he wasn't that eager to start his first real relationship in the shadows of secrets.

But Ana didn't want her father to be involved in anything concerning them. It wasn't much that she feared for his life, but more that she feared that Raymond would try to stop whatever was between them. And this little statement made Christian wonder if he knew Raymond that well after all. Not even for a second Ana had mentioned the fact that her father would go ballistic if he knew about them, she simply said that he would put a stop to them and that she didn't want to stop before anything could have even started. So maybe Christian had pictured Raymond as someone he wasn't. But then again, Christian didn't know if Ana knew the drastic measures Raymond took when he felt betrayed…

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. But Kate would have tortured me for hours if I hadn't —"

"I didn't complain, did I? As I said, I'm not the one who came up with that rule," Christian interrupted the brunette.

She smiled at him, and the two of them left the elevator to go to his apartment. As they did so, Christian pondered on whether he should inform Ana that Jose had caught them in the morning, since her best friend knew as well. But he decided against it. If Raymond were to ever find out, Ana would be clueless concerning Jose's implication in their relationship, and she wouldn't be able to unknowingly incriminate him.

He was about to close the front door when Ana froze, a slight frown shading her face. "I am not going another night to bed without cleaning my face properly. Give me just five minutes to pop by Kate's so I can get some proper attire."

She left, taking his keys with her, and Christian sat on his sofa, opening his laptop to check his mails and calendar. The night before, Ana had complained about how she had doubles of her beauty products at her friend's apartment and on how she didn't like having to go to bed with just a splash of water on her face. Christian hadn't really responded anything to that, because for him the splash of cold water had always been enough.

The minutes passed by, and as Christian expected it, Ana was still not back from her best friend's. He figured that she got caught in talking with the blonde. So he made himself a cup of camomile, like he did almost every night, and attended the most urgent emails he had. A few of them caught his attention, due to the fact that they were concerning Ronbinson Inc' and that he was still adjusting to this world. Raymond had told him that he would have very little to do with the company since his Godsons were most likely to take over when the time came, but he still wanted Christian to know how the business was run down.

And all Christian could say was that he didn't like it. He liked it better when he had to deal with people who knew him as a mobster than when he had to deal with people who knew him as a businessman. Mobsters went straight to the point, and always only giving one warning. Businessmen were more subtle than that, and Christian always had to think five steps ahead of them to make sure they weren't trying to screw him over. But of course, that was nothing compared to politicians with whom Christian had to think ten steps ahead of them. This was why he liked better dealing with thugs and dealers. It was always black or white, and there never was any sort of shade of grey.

As he was checking his calendar for the rest of the week, and trying to figure out when he would have time to hang out with Ryan, Christian found himself thinking of the trip Raymond was going to take with Elena. It wasn't the first time he was taking Elena (and only Elena) away, but it was the first time that it was so abrupt. Which was why he had expected for his presence to be required there. He wondered what kind of personal affairs the two of them could so promptly have in Vegas, especially since, as far as Christian knew, Elena had nothing to do with Idris.

He was still lost in his thoughts when the front door finally opened again. Ana entered with a bean bag stuffed, making Christian raise an eyebrow at her, wondering how many beauty products she could actually need before going to bed. She smiled at him and dropped the bag before walking to the sofa and straddling his laps, forcing Christian to sit back properly.

"All work and now play, make Christian a dull boy," She said with a playful mothering tone. Christian shook his head, though a smile grew on his lips.

"There is nothing dull about me. Or do I have to prove it to you in a more eloquent way?"

She wiggled her eyebrows at him, clearly not bothered by the prospect that he was offering her. Christian swiftly pecked her lips, before he secured her in his arms and leant so he could close his laptop. Then, he took them upstairs, though he picked up her bean bag on the way. Ana played with his hair, kissing his face every two steps. Once they were in his bedroom, Christian closed the door behind him with his foot and looked deep into the blue eyes of the girl in his arms before passionately kissing her.

Ana eagerly responded to his kiss, giggling a little when her back hit the mattress, but not breaking their connection nonetheless. On the contrary, her hands eagerly went to Christian's chest, playing with the buttons of his shirt to undress him, and when he was topless, Christian finally tore his lips away from hers, only to lead them to that sensitive spot on her neck.

Ana moaned when his teeth gripped her skin, and Christian's hands busied themselves with slowly removing any clothes that might come between him and Ana. Once the two of them only had their underwear on, Ana flipped them so she could be on top. Christian let her lead the way, as she rolled her hips to meet his bulge, and he watched her enjoy the moment, playing with her breast until he felt like it was enough.

In the blink of an eye, he turned them so he would be on top again, but this time, he started kissing his way down. Ana squirmed a little when he nibbled the skin on her left side, just below her ribs. With all the slowness of the world, Christian kissed her stomach, her inner thighs, removing her panties, and when she was finally bare before him, he kept on teasing her some more.

He blew a little on her hot little nub, making her moan and buck her hips to him. But a part of him wanted to drag this, and it was exactly what he did. With his hands, he secured her body to the mattress and placed gentle little kisses all around where she wanted him the most. He looked up and saw that she was biting her lower lip, her eyes closed and her face rumpled with frustration.

And finally, he kissed her clitoris, earning a loud sigh of relief. He gave it a few laps before stopping and making Ana cry out at the loss. He considered the option of teasing her some more, but decided against it and finally suckled on her sweet little nub. She let out a cry of satisfaction before her pants were all that could be heard in the room. And the louder they were, the more intensely Christian let his tongue play with her clitoris.

Until he felt that she needed more. One of his hands left her body, only so his fingers could gently brush her glistening entrance, making her shiver with anticipation. He played with her like that a couple of times, until she couldn't take it anymore, and pleaded,

"_Christian_…"

"Look at me," He instructed, his eyes still on her, waiting for her sapphires to open

And as they did, he let a finger slip into her wet folds. He repressed a groan when he felt her so wet for him, and wiggled his finger in her, caressing her from the inside. Her pupils were so dilated that Christian could barely distinguish the blue from her eyes, but when he added another finger to bring her more pleasure, Ana closed her eyes and snapped her head backwards, taking away from him the beautiful sight he had.

As quickly as she closed her eyes, Christian retrieved his fingers and stopped moving his tongue, making the young brunette snap her head back at him, glaring with all her might. But Christian simply smirked at her before re-entering his fingers inside of her, making her see stars.

He kept teasing her, always slowing down when he knew she would have wanted him to speed up, and when finally he put a third finger in her, Ana cried out in pleasure, throwing her head backwards and arching her back so it wouldn't be in contact with the mattress anymore. She grabbed Christian's hair, twisting her fingers in it so much that Christian was sure he was about to lose several of his hair.

But that did not stop him from increasing his speed, going in and out of her quicker with his fingers as he sucked on her clitoris. He had not taken his eyes off of her, and though he couldn't properly see her face, he still enjoyed watching her getting her high.

"_God_, Christian! Just right h—"

She never got to finish that sentence, her orgasm knocking any common sense out of her. Christian relished as he watched her slowly coming down from her high, and he started kissing his way up, lingering on her breast. When he suckled one of them with a little more force, she moaned, slightly arching to him and she started rolling her hips beneath his fingers that were still buried inside of her.

"Ready for round two?" Christian asked with a smirk. She opened her mouth to answer something smart but found herself out of wit, so she simply nodded with a pretence innocence. And Christian couldn't help but feel smug to have rendered her speechless.

He took her lower lip between his teeth and sucked it until she stopped him to kiss him with passion and desire. With his right hand, he looked for the box of condoms that was in his nightstand, and once he had one in hand, he broke their embrace to put it on. As he was rolling the thing on his member, Ana kissed his jaw and chest, already eagerly spreading her legs for him.

Once he was all geared up, he placed his member at her entrance, before she stopped him and told him filled with lust, "Christian, I don't want it nice and slow, this time."

Christian smirked at her and purposely took all his sweet time to enter. She glared at him, all her facial expressions indicating that he was deliberately teasing her and he whispered, "Maybe I want it nice and slow this time…"

Ana wiggled beneath him, trying to create more friction; but it wasn't what made Christian break his will to tease her longer. No, it was the little pout that she had and that he knew he couldn't resist to. So he retrieved himself and went back inside her with a little more force. He kept doing that again and again, each time always a little bit more forcefully and making her yelp at each thrust. He never decreased his movements, only increasing them, until he felt her clench his member with her inner walls. She sucked in a breath of air, her body all tensed up as her mouth couldn't even close, her head jerked backwards and her eyes closed.

And even though he wanted to drag their intercourse longer, he knew that he was far long gone, so he didn't try to fight it. He barely waited for Ana to come down from her orgasm, that he flipped her legs over his shoulders and took her in this position.

"Let me see your eyes, Ana," He grunted between his greeted teeth, and when she opened them to look at him, he knew he was lost.

He sped up, only encouraged by her nails planted in his biceps and that would surely leave marks there, and her incomprehensible squeaks that each of his thrusts tore out of her mouth. He felt sweat forming on his skin, and a tension building in his lower regions, begging to be released, but all he cared about was the blue eyes beneath him. He held her gaze, silently forbidding her to close her eyes, and her inner walls started convulsively clenching his shaft, triggering his own orgasm. He finally released, grunting in the crook of her neck a final breath that he shared with her, both sweaty and out of breath.

They were still trying to catch up their breath, when Christian rolled on the side, afraid that his weight might crush little Ana. Moreover, he knew that the position she was in must not be one of the most comfortable. She smiled at him, before moving closer, just so she could put her head on his chest, though she did her best to put her hair between his sweaty skin, and her face. For a few minutes, they did not share a word, trying to find back their normal breathing as Christian was mindlessly caressing Ana's arms.

"You have a weird obsession about watching me climax," Ana suddenly said, her fingers tracing incoherent lines on Christian's torso.

Christian looked down, seeing that she had raised her head so she could watch him, and he raised an eyebrow at her. He was not going to lie to himself and pretend that he didn't notice how 'obsessed' he was about seeing her eyes when she reached her high when he never really had this need with other women he brought to his bed. But that didn't mean he was going to acknowledge this little side of him to Ana.

So instead, he eluded, "You have a weird obsession about my dick and naming it. And you don't hear me complain."

Ana playfully slapped his chest as she cried out, "You complain _all the time_! Just right now, you're complaining by saying that you're not complaining."

The two of them laughed, taken in this genuine moment, and when it was over, Christian got up and went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. Ana was short on his heels, her bean bag in hands, and once Christian was condom-free, he quickly splashed his member with cold water.

Ana on the other hand was taking bottles out of her bag, ready to wash her face with endless products, and so Christian figured that he might as well get ready for the night. Since he had a double basin, he left one to Ana and washed his teeth over the other one before rinsing his face with a bit of cold water, earning a grimace from Ana and her unnecessary brushes and products.

She had tried once in Okinawa to put some clay mask on Christian's face, but it had been a losing battle for her. Whether it was by words, or by force, she had not been able to put any green substance on his face.

Once he was all done, Christian watched Ana rinse her face yet again, before she put on some sheet mask on her face, and started brushing her hair. And as she did so, he let his eyes wander to her naked body, and on the way, her muscles were playing by the movements of the brushing. His eyes lingered a moment too long on her behind, before he got a hold of himself, and told her that he would see her in bed.

Then, he walked downstairs and cleaned everything, putting back his laptop at its rightful place, and washing his mug before going back to his bedroom where Ana still remained to be seen. He folded their clothes and put them on the armchair that was by the window, and he slipped into the bed, a part of him silently thanking Katherine Kavanagh for this night that she just gave them. Because now, the best part was to come, to sleep with Ana in his arms, and wake up with her in the same place. This was the one real pleasure he got out of Japan, sleeping with Ana.

That same Ana who walked into his room, all fresh and ready for the night. She joined him in the bed, snuggling in the crook of his arms like they had done so many times whilst in Japan. Christian mindlessly kissed her hair, closing his eyes and caressing her skin, sure that she would soon go to sleep. He was used to going to sleep way after her, but he didn't mind staying a couple of hours in bed with nothing to do, but think, and hold the girl in his arms before himself falling asleep.

Ana played around with her fingers, poking his torso, and tracing the lines of his pectoral. "Maybe, I could come here this weekend. You know, since Dad is going away for _personal business_ and you are not going with him."

"Perhaps you could …" He admitted though he had no faith in the project.

He didn't mind if Raymond knew about the two of them. Of course, he would rather tell him first, because he owed it to the man, but Christian had made himself a reason that would happen what would happen when Raymond would find out about them. But Ana didn't want her father to know, and Christian didn't want to make Ana unhappy. And it would appear suspicious if she came three times within the same week to her best friend's place.

But he figured that this ought to be something to talk about in the morning, not whilst they were having a peaceful moment. So instead, he directed the conversation toward something that had interpellated him a few hours ago.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Would you mind if your father remarried?"

Ana brusquely stopped her pointless lines, and lifted her head up, so Christian opened his eyes to look at the blue of her eyes. She seemed confused, but sad as well, and Christian didn't let anything show on his face. What Raymond had told him about his wife wasn't up to him to share with Ana. This was something the two of them would have to talk about amongst themselves.

"Why?" She asked, narrowing her eyes with suspicion. "Does he have a woman I know nothing about?"

Christian frowned, wondering how Ana could think that of her father. Or how she could think _he_ would bring this particular topic, if there had been a woman he could not talk about.

"No. As far as I'm concerned, your father is still a widower. I am just curious about your reaction to him going to Vegas. Or your reaction right now, for that matter."

Ana bit her lower lip, looking down, and Christian patiently waited for her to explain on her own what was going on in her mind.

"Actually … I wouldn't really mind if he did. To be honest, I think it's sad that he still hasn't after all these years. But … I would be so pissed if he brought a woman out of the blue, or if he snuck up on me to do his dirty deeds."

Christian rose an eyebrow at her, the irony of her words not lost on him. After all, _she _was sneaking out on her father to do her dirty deeds, with _him_ nonetheless. Ana shook her head, her brows slightly furrowed as she explained,

"It's not the same with us. We're clearly not that serious, and we are _definitely _not ever going to get married. _We_ are just … enjoying the moment, and he would clearly put a stop to it if he knew. I would never stop my father from being happy again."

"It's not the impression you gave in the car," Christian said, playing with a loose curl that had escaped her bun.

There was no condonation in his tone, but he still felt like he said the wrong thing, or at least that he did not use the correct tone, for Ana furrowed her brows before retaking her former position, hiding her face from Christian. He was about to explain how she had sounded a bit cold when she asked about her father's whereabouts when she said with a small voice,

"I actually don't remember much about my Mom. But there is this one thing that I will never forget. It's how Dad used to smile when she would enter a room, or when he would get back home and see her first. It's … a bit vague, but … I've never seen that smile on Dad's face ever since Mom's …"

She didn't finish her sentence, and Christian held her closer, understanding that she didn't want to utter out loud even the mention of her mother's death. He wasn't really sure of what he could say, or if there were any words that could be said. He gently caressed the skin of her arm, when she brusquely looked up, all smiles to him.

"But anyway, let's talk about something more cheerful and less cock-blocking than my father."

"I'm all ears," Christian told her, returning her her smile. She thought about it for a second, before deviously smiling and saying with a taunting voice,

"Paul was nice …"

Christian rose an eyebrow at her, before closing his eyes and resting his head backwards, "How is that supposed to not be cock-blocking?"

During the little interaction between Paul and Ana, Christian had been rather conflicted, but he wasn't really sure what it had been about. He wasn't naive enough to not know that it had been jealousy clutching his heart, but he wasn't actually sure where his jealousy was targeted. He couldn't tell if he had been bothered by the fact that Paul flirted with Ana, or by the fact that he had the opportunity to do it so openly.

Ana laughed, before she kissed Christian's jaw, and made amend, "Okay, sorry. That was mean. Let's talk about something else, then. I went lingerie shopping today."

"I know."

"How could you know, you were busy all day long? Do you get stalker vibes from hanging too much with my father? From him, it's sweet, from you, it's … creepy."

Christian couldn't help but lightly laugh at this, finally reopening his eyes to look at the brunette. She was narrowing her eyes at him, apparently serious in her allegations, and so he clarified for her,

"I'm hardly a stalker. I'm just a very good observer. I saw the gazillion bags you left in the trunk for your father to take home. And amongst those bags were several from a famous lingerie brand. Simple as that."

"I don't know if I should be weirded out by the fact that you can recognise a lingerie logo, or if I should be shocked that you thought that _that_ was a lot of bags," She said, before shaking her head, and squishing closer to Christian, as she continued, "But anyway, all of that to say that as I was lingerie shopping it occurred to me that I don't know your favourite colour. Or your favourite piece of lingerie. You know, the kind of thing that will make the big monster down there get up at lightning speed."

Christian smirked, keeping for himself that given her body, or the way she looked at him sometimes, she hardly needed a small piece of fabric to get him hard. His eyes ravaged her face, noticing the small and faint freckles fading away as winter was coming, or how her skin was glowy, probably due to all the products she used in the bathroom. And finally, he said, caressing her soft cheek,

"Blue. I like the colour blue on you."

"What kind of blue? Baby blue? Turquoise? Navy blue? Sapphire?"

"Any kind of blue. Blue simply suits you."

He could swear that he saw a faint blush cover her cheeks (though he wasn't sure if it wasn't due to her face wash), but she quickly recovered, and kept asking,

"So, blue is your favourite colour?"

"No. That's the colour I like best on you. How about you? What is your favourite colour?"

"Well … I like emerald green a lot. But I am also deeply into marigold."

Christian rose an eyebrow, confused at this new colour that was introduced to him, and Ana shook her head as she explained, "It's a shade of orange. A tad lighter than honey orange. It's also a pretty flower that has this particular colour."

He nodded, but mostly to humour her. As far as he was concerned, colours were colours and their variations and shades were just lighter or darker. But he knew better than to argue with a girl on that sort of details that were so important to them.

Ana grinned at him, her hands still playing with his chest before she started to go south. She bit her lower lip, and asked with her most innocent voice, "So, maybe you should picture me wearing something blue until the time I actually do."

Christian chuckled, though any response coming from him was cut short by Ana firmly grabbing his member in her small hand and going up and dow to make him harder. She kissed him, grinding against him as her hand was working on him, and a part of him wondered if he would make it until the end this time. He knew that he would be able to deliver for her, but he wasn't sure if he would finish himself. He was tired, to the limit of exhausted and feeling like the best of his potential had already been spent an hour ago.

Still, that did not stop him from enjoying what the brunette was doing to him, and once he was fully erected, he slipped his hand beneath the cover to do to her what she did to him. But Ana stopped him, her eyes filled with lust and a hint of malice as she told him, "Since you like to watch me so much, I think you should simply watch this time as well …"

Then, she removed the cover from her body and removed her hand from his member, only to bury it between her own legs. She moaned, struggling to keep her eyes open, but holding Christian's gaze nonetheless; and Christian watched her finger herself, making her breath become more and more shallow by the minute. She kept touching herself until she suddenly stopped and kissed Christian, moving so she would be on top of him. He stopped her before she could move any more, and took a condom from the nightstand. Ana watched him put it on, and once he was properly wrapped, she slowly impaled herself on him.

Christian saw the little grimace of discomfort that briefly came across her face, showing him that she was clearly not ready enough, but that feeling barely lasted. Once he was fully inside her, she closed her eyes and waited a little, before she started rolling her hips, a wide grin of satisfaction spreading her lips.

Christian let her lead the way, mesmerised by the view before him and once she started speeding a bit the rhythm, he reached up to her breast so he could play with them. Ana kept rolling her hips, her head thrown back, and Christian suddenly sat up, grabbing her face with one of his hands so their foreheads would touch.

"Ana …"

She opened her eyes before he could even say the words, her eyes filled with lust and wonders. For a moment, they remained like that, so close with Ana riding Christian. But then, she pushed him back so he was laying down the bed once again, and she laid on top of him. Christian knew that this was her favourite position because his pelvic would touch her clitoris while her inner flower would be filled with the rest of him. And she got to decide the pace of it all.

She started going up and down, and bit Christian's earlobe before confessing to his ear, "I love feeling you like this.

Christian jerked his hips upwards, matching his rhythms to her and knowing that it would stimulate her even more; and she moaned of pleasure, arching herself a little. Christian grabbed her throat, his eyes solely on her face as the two of them increased the pace, and Ana let out a guttural sound of her mouth,

"_Yes_. Just like that."

Her eyes were filled with lust, glassy with need and struggling to stay open. She panted her need for more, and so Christian held her throat a tiny bit tighter. He felt that, surprisingly, he was not far from release himself, especially when her inner walls tightened their grip on him. He thrust his hips up, bringing her face closer to his as he told her,

"Come for me, I'm so close."

Ana accelerated her back and forth movements, completely lost in her orgasm, as she panted louder and louder, and finally, a scream ripped through her lungs as her whole body tensed on top of Christian. She collapsed on top of Christian with a satisfied sigh, but Christian rolled her so _she_ would be the one on her back.

He knew that he wasn't going to last long and that she was already tired, so he didn't plan on trying to make it last any longer. He simply rammed into her, reaching between them to stimulate her already spent clitoris. He was fully aware that he was being greedy, and that the chance he could get her to climax with so little stimulation was thin, but he still went for it. Mostly because he liked the fact that they would reach cloud nine together. Which they did barely a few seconds later, Ana screaming his name as if she was screaming bloody murder.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

It had been a month since Ana and Christian had decided to start seeing each other in secret, and Christian had to admit that he was far from disliking it. Sure, he still disliked the part where he had to lie, or at least elude the truth, but he liked spending time with Ana, even if sometimes it was only over the phone.

She had only come back to his place twice after that night when she and her best friend met with Paul Clayton, but they had kept in touch through texts and phone calls. Out of the two of them, Christian was being the one who was more careful about their relationship. Probably because he had training in that area, whereas Ana simply went with the flow.

Still, there were a few little things he liked about being with Ana. He liked how she always managed to find a funny picture to send him when he had had a bad day (which happened a lot lately). He liked how forward she was concerning her wants and needs (especially when she would send him dirty pictures to make him feel her frustration). But what he liked the most, was how she was opening up to him.

She was talking to him more and more about her, her life and her insecurities. Of course, she did not speak as openly as Christian would like, but she was definitely less reserved than she had been in Japan, and even less reserved than she was with Jose. And out of all the things she shared with Christian, one thing stayed in his mind, it was the name _Mike_. Though he had a clear idea of who Mike was to Ana (and by default Raymond), he still didn't know for sure. And he didn't want to ask Ana yet, because he felt like she was not ready yet to open up about this part of her life.

With a little shake of his head, Christian tore himself out of his reverie, and got out of the shower. He had been up for a few hours now, did his morning workout, answered a few emails and started breakfast before he hopped in the shower to let the batter rest. So once he was moisturised and dressed, he went to the kitchen and started making blueberry banana pancakes.

He wasn't really fond of pancakes, but Ana loved blueberries, especially when they were mixed in the pancake batter. And since Ana had spent the night, Christian had decided to bake those as a little surprise for when she would wake up.

He put on some music, his choice going to old French music for it was his favourite genre, and he sipped on his unsweetened green tea as he flipped pancakes after pancakes in the pan. As he was pouring the last drop of batter in the pan, Ana got down the stairs whilst Edith Piaf sang _La Foule._ Though he heard her, Christian didn't turn his head to her, simply smiling when she hugged him from behind, kissing his back before sitting on a chair.

He boiled some water for her, and gave her his box of tea, making her grunt, slopping the upper half of her body on the table, "_Ugh_! You need to buy coffee, Christian! No normal human being can properly function on tea."

"I do it," He retorted, pouring hot water in a mug for her and making her grimace as she pointed out,

"Like I said, _normal human beings_."

"Brits do it," He countered, not even bothering answering her taunt. She grimaced, even more, picking some jasmine tea as she mumbled,

"Brits aren't normal. Nobody _that_ polite can be normal."

Christian rolled his eyes, putting the plate of pancakes on the table. He knew that she wasn't a morning person, and even less when she hadn't had her coffee. The last time she was here, she had a long rant of an hour about how he was not normal to not have sugar, or coffee, or even soda in his fridge.

"Promise, I will buy you some coffee for the next time you will come."

Her eyes illuminated and she asked with glee, "You're going to buy a coffee machine?"

"What? No. I'll buy some instantaneous coffee. I'm not getting useless appliances."

"It's not useless, it helps me … not be useless in the morning," She added, wiggling her eyebrows at the end.

Christian rolled his eyes, sipping on his tea as he sat next to her with a newspaper and told her, "Sex won't help you out on that."

She grunted, throwing her head back. Christian smiled, leaning to kiss her cheek before taking a few pancakes into his plates. The music kept on playing in the background, Edith Piaf replaced by another singer while the two of them ate in silence for a little while. Christian liked those little moments of peace he shared with Ana, doing the most mundane things like eating or watching a movie, though he had to admit that he wished Ana was more into modern movies. She liked old movies that lasted three hours or more and where people talked more than fought.

Ana got up and went to fetch her phone before sitting back next to Christian, resting her legs on his laps. Christian didn't mind, he liked having a sort of contact with her. Well, he simply liked being with her. Though he wasn't sure a hundred per cent if he liked being with Ana per se, or if he liked being in a steady relationship with a woman for the first time in his life. There were many things he liked he knew were particular to Ana, but other things that could be qualified as simple relationship bliss.

"What time do you have to go?" Ana asked, scrolling through her phone and sipping on her tea. Christian checked his watch and told her that he wouldn't stay for long,

"I am supposed to meet your father in an hour."

To Christian's greatest surprise, Raymond still hadn't found out anything concerning him and Ana. Despite the fact that Ana wasn't really good at being discreet, or at covering properly her tracks, Raymond still had no clue of what was going on behind his back. He still talked to Christian and acted with him the way he always did, and never mentioned anything concerning Ana that was out of the ordinary.

Actually, over the month that had passed, Raymond had included Christian a lot more into his social circle, to Christian's greatest dismay. He didn't really like socialising, but Raymond had told him that it was a part necessary of their line of work. Whether it was the official or the unofficial business. So Christian had to endure sports games as well as club nights with people he didn't like working with in the first place. But as usual, when it came to working with other people, Christian faked it and blended in, though he did his best to stay in Raymond's shadow.

"So …" Ana finally put down her phone and continued, "I'd like to go to Paris."

"Is it the music that put you in the mood?" Christian inquired, finishing his tea and watching the brunette eat her pancakes. Ana rolled her eyes at him, and pointed her fork at him as she accused him with a full mouth,

"No. You're just some kind of old French dude hidden in some smocking hot body. I can't do anything about it. But that's beside the point. I want to visit the Iron Lady, and see Notre-Dame, and have dinner on the River Seine. I want to eat baguette and swear in French whilst wearing a fashionable beret."

Christian laughed at that, mostly because he knew that Ana sucked in French. She slightly kicked him, her legs still on his laps, and he simply smiled at her, as he inquired, "And when are you going?"

"Well, I was wondering if you would like to come with me?" She asked and Christian had to refrain himself from laughing again. Instead, he got up and kissed her forehead before tidying his place as he reminded her,

"There is this promise you made me do a month ago that keeps me from taking you to Paris. Unless you're having second thoughts?"

"No, it still stands! But I was just thinking that if you want to come with me, I would ask Dad to not send an armada with me."

Christian thought about it as he washed his mug, feeling that it was too risky as a plan. Raymond wasn't someone stupid, he could easily see through her game. But … he wouldn't mind spending some time away with Ana, and sleeping with her every night, not just every once in a while. Still, there were other things to be taken into consideration,

"It wouldn't be like last time. I work a lot more than I did when we went to Japan. I am bound to work from my laptop if we go abroad."

"It's okay. I just want it to be just the two of us. In Paris would be best."

"Well, you can ask, but that doesn't mean your father will automatically have me come with you," Christian warned because he knew that the next couple of weeks were going to be very busy for them and that there was very little chance that Raymond would send him away.

Ana rolled her eyes at that, apparently sure that her father would ask Christian and no other. Christian knew the confidence Raymond had in him, and so far he wasn't doubting it, but he also knew that there was so much to do that would stop him from going.

Still, he didn't bounce on any of that, and simply went back to sit next to Ana, picking up her feet to reposition them on his laps as he asked,

"Anyway, what brought this sudden interest in Paris?"

"Honestly, I just want to travel, and with you would be best. If you have somewhere else you would like to go, I'm all ears…"

"Paris is fine," Christian assured with a small smile, though he still doubted he would get to go with all that was going on at the moment. But he didn't say a word about that, mostly because of the way Ana beamed at him, before looking at her phone, texting someone.

Christian skimmed through the newspaper, mostly to occupy his eyes whilst his hands were massaging Ana's calves as the music kept on playing in the background. Jacques Brel was singing about _La Valse A Mille Temps_ when Ana suddenly looked up her phone.

"What's wrong with this guy?"

Christian laughed a little, not taking his eyes away from the paper as he explained, "It's a beautiful song."

"He needs to take a breath!"

"And you need to learn French," Christian retorted with a smile. Ana stuck her tongue to him, and so he got up and rewinded the song back to the beginning before he went back to Ana and proposed her his hand.

She rose her eyebrow at him, but still smiled and took his hand. He placed his hand on her waist, and started waltzing as Jacques Brel started singing.

"The first verse is about the beginning of love in Paris. A girl alone and a boy alone seeing each other. It's the beginning of love, so it's slow, it's sweet, it's cheery, just like the song," They waltzed on the tempo of the song, Christian leading as Ana had her eyes glued on him. She seemed hypnotised by the song.

"Then, the second verse is a bit faster because love starts spinning. Testing yourself, testing the couple. Testing love. It makes your head spin and your heart beat faster, but they are no longer alone. They are two, in each other's arms and starting to see the world the same way with Paris as a witness," Christian had accelerated their dance, keeping up with the increasing music while his eyes never let go of her blue ones.

"The third verse is about the final stage of love. The moment when it's no longer two people, but three. Life and love is hectic, just like the rythme of the song. You can no longer control the beat, just like you can no longer control love. You are submerged by it, and the stronger it gets, the faster your heartbeat is, the faster the song is."

The song finished abruptly and they stilled looking at each other before Christian bent down and kissed her on the lips with delicacy.

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ Awwwww Fluff! And no ****cliffy! What is happening to me? Seriously, I think I am getting sick! **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the lemons? And Christian's 'obsession'?**

**💚What did you think of lovey-dovey moments? And the trip to Paris? Will it occur?**

**💚 How do you feel about Christian's reaction to Paul Clayton?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Haha, definitely OOC, but I hope you liked this chapter nonetheless..._

**Guest2: **_Thank you, And you WILL get to see bad boy Christian _

**Mar: **_I see what you mean, but as I said in the AN, those POV were necessary to the plot. Otherwise, some moments in the story, later on, would have felt as coming out of nowhere. Especially Jose and his insecurities, or Kate and Ana's views on how certain things should be done. But don't worry, the story is 98% Christian POV_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	14. Chapter 13: Honest Men?

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 13: Honest Men? ****(4,4K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

As Christian walked Patrick Hyde to the door of the office, he couldn't help but be relieved that he no longer had to be in the presence of the man. Ever since Raymond had started investing Christian in the Robinson Inc', Christian had had this bad feeling about this one associate, Patrick Hyde.

He couldn't tell per se what he didn't like in the man, maybe it was his cologne or the way he talked and walked, maybe it was his shifty eyes, but in the end, Christian didn't like him. He actually more than didn't like him, he despised him. There was something shady about him, and Christian could put his hand to the test. He actually had a mind to follow him someday, but each time there had been an opportunity for him to do so, Ana had come over, and Christian didn't have the heart, nor will, to ask her to reschedule.

Of course, Christian was sure that Patrick Hyde had no idea of the way he felt about him, for he always talked oh-so-nicely to him when Christian came to the office with Raymond. In fact, Patrick was always very nice to everyone at the office, from the high holder that was Eamon Kavanagh, to the simple secretary working at ground level. Maybe that was yet again a reason why Christian didn't like this man, he was too nice, to be honest.

Without saying a word, Christian returned to the desk, where Raymond and Eamon were sitting, revising once again the contract that Hyde had just brought them, in the hope for Robinson Inc' to buy off another company.

"There is still much to go over with this. Let's order some food," Raymond said, not even taking the time to look away from his papers.

Eamon agreed and called of some Chinese food whilst Christian looked over at the file presenting the company they were about to buy. In his mind, this was a wrong move that shouldn't be done since the soon-to-be-bought company was already on its way to bankruptcy. Christian couldn't see what would be beneficiary for Robinson Inc' to take the burden of a failing company.

He kept looking over and over at the papers, trying to see what he missed and would justify their investment, but no matter with what perspective he was looking at the situation, the end game was still the same, there was no profit to be made. When the food was delivered, Christian disregarded the papers and dug on his rice whilst Raymond and Eamon did the same.

Eamon glanced at him and the papers next to him, before smiling and telling him, "Ethan too had some problems understanding why we would burden ourselves with such companies when he first started working here. And I'm going to tell you the same thing I told him. Sometimes, helping a small company get back on its feet simply feels good. It isn't much about the profit, but more about the self-satisfaction."

Christian rose an eyebrow, having problems believing what he was hearing. "You're not interested in making profits?"

"We're just interested in not investing in a money pit. Like I said, helping makes you feel good about yourself."

"An honest businessman … That's something I've never see," Christian chuckled with a disbelieving tone. In fact, as soon as a person had a little power, Christian always had his doubts concerning the honesty of the person. Politicians, businessmen, cops …

Eamon laughed with him, as Raymond had a small smile on his lips, the kind of smile that Christian didn't like because it was making him feel like he was missing something important, and that he was about to be explained the same way one would explain to a child.

"I never said that I was honest," Eamon corrected, reaching for some vegetarian egg-rolls. "I am just trying to keep my karma in balance. Unlike some other people in this room, I believe in the afterlife."

Eamon glanced at Raymond just in time to see him roll his eyes, and Christian realised at that moment that this was an aspect of Raymond's life that he knew very little about. He knew that Ana was a believer, not that she told him in so many words, but because the way she talked about certain things did not give so much room for questioning. It was obvious in his eyes. But in all the years Christian had worked with Raymond in close proximity, he couldn't tell if Raymond was religious or not. Though if he had to guess, he would go for the latter.

"I believe in the life we're living in right now. And right now, I want to know what Patrick is up to? Why does he want us to take over this particular company?"

Christian didn't say anything, but he was glad to see that he wasn't the only one having second thoughts about Patrick Hyde. He kept on eating, leaving the two men argue on whether they should buy the company or not, and listening to both parties when Raymond turned his head to Christian.

"What do you think of him?"

"Who? Hyde?" Raymond nodded, clearly expecting a real answer out of Christian, and so he chose very carefully his words, "I think that I am not in a position of making a real opinion about him. I am still rather new in this world of business, and I am clearly not educated enough to form a just and impartial opinion of him."

Raymond looked straight in his eyes, like the many times he had done before when he knew that Christian wasn't being as open as he usually was with him; and he insisted, "This isn't what I asked you? I asked what do _you_ think of him?"

Christian glanced at Eamon, who was pretending to be overly interested in his food, though Christian was perfectly aware that he was paying attention to the exchange happening; and so he told Raymond, "I … am not sure that my opinion on the man matters."

Raymond held his gaze, forcing him to talk, and making Christian finally say what he had been holding on, "I don't trust him. But that is my personal opinion, and I can't give you proofs as to why you shouldn't trust him either. But as I said, I am not a businessman."

Eamon laughed, dropping the food he had on his chopsticks back in the carton box, as he said, "Oh yes you are. No respectable businessman trusts people he works with. You're just not a skilled businessman, yet."

Raymond chuckled at that, giving reason to Eamon, "True. A trusting businessman is either the luckiest bastard on Earth or the most screwed bastard on Earth. So, when are you planning to find these proofs you were talking about?"

"Soon," Christian assured, feeling that somehow, Raymond already had those elements, and was just testing Christian on the matter. And like every time Raymond had subtly tested Christian like that, Christian was not intending to fail that test.

They kept on eating, still talking about the takeover when Eamon received a text message that made him genuinely laugh before he said, "Elena is going crazy with all that wedding bliss."

Then he showed his phone to Raymond, and whatever he saw on the screen made him laugh as well before he told the other man, "Yes, Ana is really excited about it as well. The house is starting to look like a bridal shop."

"Doesn't that give you some ideas?" Eamon nudged, and Raymond immediately shook his head.

"Ana is right where she should be. She's only twenty, might I remind you?"

"And so is Kate," Eamon argued with a tone so used to it, that Christian felt like this wasn't the first time the two men had this kind of conversation.

"I know. But … Elliott is a different story. He's a good kid."

"A good kid who could afford a hell of a ring, by the way," Eamon asserted, his voice full of innuendos, which made Christian frown slightly.

He was very well aware that Ana's best friend was preparing her wedding, Ana _loved_ talking about Katherine's upcoming marriage. In fact, when Ana was talking about her two best friends' love story, Christian could see a side of her that he never got to see otherwise, that she was a helpless romantic, no matter how much she tried to hide it the rest of the time.

But Christian also flattered himself to know many of Raymond's actions, and he wasn't aware that he leant money to the boy about to marry his Goddaughter. It wasn't much the loan that was bothering Christian, but more to whom he gave it to. After all, on more than one occasion, Raymond had told Christian over and over again to never mix money and family. And Elliott Cohen was about to enter his family with a debt to Raymond.

"Do you have something you'd like to ask?" Raymond asked with a smug smile on his lips, and Eamon didn't hesitate to bluntly ask,

"You didn't lend him money, did you? The kid will never be able to pay you back, he already had his student loan to pay, and you know he'll never ask Kate to help him pay."

"Now, Eamon. I know that I have my imperfections, but I am not heartless. Especially when it comes to one of my Godchild. Fate simply put me on his way, nothing more than that.

I was in a jewellery shop to change the battery of my watch when I heard Elliot trying to negotiate how many times he could pay for the ring without fees. By the way, never let him handle any business, he's a poor negotiator. Anyway, I helped, and he paid what he could afford for the ring, I gave the rest."

"You _gave_?" Eamon mused, and Christian was with him on this one. He never heard of Raymond being this generous. Raymond simply smiled, finishing his rice as he reminded Eamon,

"Like I told you Elliott is a good kid, and I care about my Goddaughter's happiness. He actually tried to give me back some money two weeks ago, it was cute."

Though he didn't say anything, or even let his face show any sort of emotions, Christian was stunned by what he was learning. But after thinking about it a little, he realised that he didn't really know how Raymond felt about his Godchildren, or his daughter, because Raymond never talked about them. He knew that Raymond loved Ana beyond measure, because he went to the mansion and saw them interact with one another, and because he had friends who witnessed the same thing. But taking an outsider's point-of-view, one couldn't know how deeply Raymond felt about his daughter, just like one couldn't tell what he was willing to do for one of his Godchild.

"Well, Kate is over the moon," Eamon assured, with a goofy smile on his lips as he threw his carton box in the bin. "I'm telling you, Ray, you should really loosen up about Ana and you won't regret it."

Raymond darkly laughed at that, before looking at Christian, and asking for his opinion, "What do you think, Christian? Knowing who I am, am I too tight on my daughter's security and wellbeing?"

Christian glanced at Eamon once again, not much that he didn't want to speak in front of him, but more because he wasn't sure if Eamon knew about Raymond's other activities. Sure he was the husband of Raymond's long-time friend, Elena (and Christian never doubted for even a second that Elena knew everything there was to know about her friend), but that didn't mean that Eamon knew. But then again, he seemed to know about Raymond's policy concerning loans, and something about the way he talked to Raymond let Christian know that he knew. So he took the chance.

"Honestly? As a mobster, not at all. But as a person and a father … maybe you ought to loosen the tight rope you have on her …"

If he was honest with himself, Christian couldn't tell if his words were really what he thought, or more what he wished. After all, if Raymond loosened the security around Ana, that meant that they could spend more time together without having to fear someone would rat on them.

"Oooh. So according to you, I should let my daughter go to Paris alone?"

"Ana wants to go to Paris?" Eamon asked, snapping his head to Raymond, and Raymond grimaced as he swallowed a coco pearl,

"Yes, she's been bugging me about for almost a week, now."

"Why don't you let her go? This doesn't look like you," Eamon mused with surprised eyes, and Christian could understand why. He doubted that Raymond was able to resist any of his daughter's demands, so it seemed very unlikely of him to not grant her something as simple as a trip aboard.

Christian even had to admit that he had thought it weird that Ana didn't mention Paris again over the week that had passed since she told him that she wanted to go with him. He had thought that maybe she still hadn't asked her father, or maybe she had abandoned the idea, but now he was starting to understand why Raymond had postponed his answer to his daughter.

Raymond glanced at Christian, taking another coco pearl, and let Eamon know (though his eyes never let Christian), "She liked the illusion of freedom she had in Japan."

"Well, give it back to her," Eamon argued, clearly not understanding the innuendos that Raymond used, and so Christian answered for his boss,

"We're in the middle of a transaction. If I leave now to go abroad, it might give a negative image of the company."

Eamon shook his head, and suggested, "I'm not saying _now_. I'm saying when we finish with this deal. It shouldn't take more than half a week. I don't understand why you wouldn't give that to your daughter, Ray. She would love to have the possibility to Christmas shop in Paris."

"I don't think Christian appreciated much his time with Ana when in Japan," Raymond revealed, and this made a part of Christian relish. If he had fooled Raymond to make him think that he didn't like spending time with Ana, it meant that Raymond didn't suspect anything concerning the evolution of the relationship between him and Ana.

Both men looked at Christian, expecting him to say something, and he simply shrugged, "I don't think my opinion matters here, Boss. She's your daughter, and I'm just your man. Your choice is made on which one of us you should accommodate."

Eamon burst in laughter, throwing his head back as he told Raymond, "The kid knows you better than yourself."

Raymond didn't even smile at that, his brows furrowed as he looked at Christian, apparently unhappy with the answer he had given him. He told him, "I don't want to force you into doing something you don't want to do."

"Like I said, my opinions are not important here. This isn't business or work, it's your family, Raymond," Christian argued, keeping for himself that he would be more than happy to go with Ana abroad.

"Very well, I'll let her know to prepare her suitcase, then," Raymond said. Eamon gave him a pat on the shoulder and comforted him,

"You should lighten up, Ray. Cut Ana some slacks. She's twenty, and she doesn't even know how to drive and walk around by her own in the City. You ought to give her some freedom, because the love she has for you, one day, it won't be enough to stop history from repeating itself …"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

"Seriously, what was wrong with calling a cab?" Jose complained, holding his coat closer to him as they were walking in the streets, heading to Mrs Parvati's restaurant where Ryan was admittedly waiting for them.

Jose had never been one to like the cold, which Christian always made fun of when came winter because Jose would dress like an inuit at the first small drop of temperature. He was currently wearing a beanie and gloves, even though the temperatures were rather warm for the last days of November.

They were two blocks from the Indian restaurant when Christian's phone rang, revealing Ana's number on the screen. Christian decelerated his pace a little and took the call, Jose not far from him. He didn't even have time to say hello, that Ana was shouting in his ear,

"_We're going to Paris_!"

"I know," Christian simply replied a small smile on his lips due to the excitement he could tell she was feeling.

"How boring! We're going to Paris, and all you have to say is 'I know'! You really aren't normal. Tea made you miss basic human emotions," She teased, making Christian smile even more. "Anyway, how long before you're back to your place? I told Dad I was sleeping at Kate's and you're not home. How are we supposed to celebrate, if only one of us is here?"

"I'm eating out with friends. I shouldn't be long after that," Christian promised, unable to stop his smile from growing at the perspective of sleeping with Ana this night. He had given her a spare key a month ago for the times she would 'see her best friend', but he wouldn't be home yet.

"Well, don't eat too much, or you won't have any room left for dessert …"

"I always have room left for dessert. You know that better than anyone," Christian countered, sure that Ana was now wiggling her eyebrows, even though he wasn't there to witness it.

She chortled on the other side of the line, and they both hang up. Then Christian resumed his previous path, feeling Jose's gaze on him as they kept on walking to Mrs Parvati's. For a minuted, they walked in silence, before Jose seemed unable to hold any longer his thoughts on the matter, and bursted,

"You're playing a very dangerous game, here, Christian."

"I know," Was all Christian said. He knew he was risking much by going behind Raymond's back, and he knew that he was doing to his boss and mentor the very same thing that he hated. But he also knew that that, like Raymond, he seemed to have difficulties refusing to Ana. And therefore, it wasn't his choice that mattered.

"Do you think that she ever plans on letting you go of your promise?" Jose asked.

Ever since Jose had caught Ana in Christian's bed, he never really brought back the matter in a conversation, and Christian never held back against him. He understood that unknowingly, Jose had put himself in a delicate situation by discovering something he wasn't supposed to know in the first place.

"I don't think she will," Christian said, recalling how Ana had reacted a week ago during breakfast when he had suggested for him to officially take her to Paris when she had mentioned her desire to go to France.

He could tell that Jose wanted to add something, so he stopped walking, earning a grunt of annoyance from the Hispanic man for having to stop in the 'freezing cold', and he waited for his friend to elaborate what he really had in mind.

"Well .. Don't go thinking that I am being cold-hearted here … But … Don't fall in love with her. Because she won't be able to give you what you ultimately want… I just don't want you to be miserable."

Christian genuinely laughed at that, shaking his head a little as he resumed walking to the restaurant. "Do I look miserable?"

"Christian … I've been to your place. And a family with her won't be able to bloom as long as she holds you to your promise…"

"Don't worry so much Jose. It will give you premature wrinkles. As Ana said 'we're not that serious, we're just enjoying ourselves'," Christian assured, avoiding what the real issue that Jose had unveiled.

Christian knew very well that it wasn't healthy for either Ana or him to pursue the relationship they had, especially since it was the first time for him to actually steady himself with someone, and he knew what he wanted later in life didn't fit with what he had with Ana, or what Ana was willing to give him. But … he wasn't willing either to stop whatever they had.

As they entered Mrs Parvati's restaurant, Christian could tell that Jose was sceptical concerning his last words, but neither of them said a word about it. They met up with Ryan under Mrs Parvati's remarks that it had been a while since Christian had come.

"My daughter told me that you were avoiding me because I was trying to marry you off to her."

"Are you kidding? If you were my mother-in-law I'd be the happiest man on Earth," Christian argued with a big smile, making Mrs Parvati shout to her daughter in the kitchen,

"Ritika! You're getting married! Christian has just agreed!" Then, she turned to Christian with a big smile, "Of course, I'm expecting grandchildren very very soon. I need kids to spoil."

The three men at the table laughed as she left with their order, and Ryan warned Christian, "You want to be careful. Next time you'll come, she is going to take you to the backdoor, and you will kidnap for a whole month."

"As I said, I don't mind Mrs Parvati being my mother-in-law," Christian repeated with humour. Everyone who knew him a little knew that he loved Mrs Parvati's food.

When their food was brought to them, they ate all together, talking about various things; and one thing leading to the other, Ryan started complaining how Christian had forsaken him ever since he got back from Japan, leaving him alone without a wingman to hit the bars.

"I mean, it's already hard enough when your wingman is a sober stick in the mud, such as yourself. But now … you're not even here for me to tell you that you're being an annoying sober stick in the mud! Did you get a girl in Japan?"

"And I brought her back folded in half in my bag?"

"I know … But you used to not leave me alone. We haven't been out in _forever_! I _need_ my time out from work. Not everyone is cut out like you, Christian. Not everyone _breathes_ Raymond and only needs that to live."

Christian didn't bounce on that, perfectly aware that his loyalty to their boss was often something mocked by the other men, for they seemed to think it was too extreme. Still, he promised his friend,

"When I get back from Paris, we will go out together.'

"Back from Paris? You're going on business?" Ryan suspiciously asked, and when Christian negatively shook his head, he complained, "It is rather unfair that you get to travel the world, only to watch over Ana. Raymond needs to stop being overprotective … Or at least, let me or Jose enjoy the fun that must be to watch over his daughter overseas."

"Who said it was fun?" Christian questioned, painfully recalling all the shopping sessions he had to suffer whilst in Japan.

"We already established that you were a stick in the mud. You don't know the meaning of fun."

Jose snickered with Ryan, and Christian simply rolled his eyes to the sky. He knew that he had this reputation of a very uptight person, but he didn't mind. On the contrary, it had helped him on several occasions.

They were still eating through the main course when Christian's phone unexpectedly rang. He took it out of his pocket but did not recognise the number displayed on the screen. Still, he answered.

"Christian?" Asked a girl's voice on the other end. It seemed rather familiar to Christian, but he couldn't tell to whom belonged the voice.

"Who is it?"

"I don't know if you remember me. You helped me a few weeks ago …"

"Mia?" He inquired, recalling that he had given his number to an escort several weeks earlier, though he didn't think that she would actually call when so much time had passed since then.

"Yes. I need help."

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

** Okay, there is a lot in this chapter. And a small cliffy, but nothing very damaging, compared to what I have in store.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Raymond and Eamon? (There is a hint ****somewhere in this conversation)**

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Christian and ****Jose?**

**💚 What do you think about Mia calling?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Awwww You're so sweet. I'm so glad you're liking the story so much. Hope the next chapter will be just as much_

**Guest2: **_Thank you, and yeah, the lemons were quite ... interesting. There will be more, don't worry, but there will be drama Mouhahahhahah._

**Guest3****: **_I'm so glad you're liking the story so much, and though Paris is not, for now, I can't wait for you to read it 😉_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	15. Chapter 14: 911

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

‼️**IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END**‼️

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 14: 911 ****(6,6K)**

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**💚Also, do pay attention, because this chapter is going to be very obvious about certain key points of this story. I can't wait for you guys to pick up on them**

**💚 ALSO, I have another story, if you want to check it out called Give Me The Daddy & I'll Give You The Sugar. It is something completely different to this one, but do check it out, I'm sure you will love it! {_T_**_**wenty-five years old Ana has had a hard life and is, now, struggling between two jobs to pay for her studies. She's through with people, having been left down one too many times. But what happens when a certain man finds interest in her? CHRISTIAN/ANA {OOC/AH/AU} Romance/Drama/Hurt}**_

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

As Christian was riding the elevator up to the room number Mia had given him, he was trying to figure out what he should tell her, and how he would help her. It wasn't the first time that Raymond helped a girl to quit the profession and disappear so she could get her own life, but Christian never really asked how Raymond did it. He mostly only gave the girl the card with the number to call, and that was it. He didn't know all the ramifications Raymond went through, and most of all, he didn't know which words to use to make sure the girl would feel safe.

Still, that did not stop him from going to Mia, though he knew he was entering on unknown territory, which he really didn't like. A part of him actually wondered if it was a test from Raymond, and he clearly didn't intend to fail this one.

When he knocked on the door, nobody answered, which he thought was weird. Though, if he were honest with himself, he already thought it weird that a hooker would give him rendezvous in a hotel (a pricey one at that) when all she wanted to do was to escape this world. He furrowed his brows slightly, before taking his phone out of his pocket and recalling his last caller.

She answered at the first ring, and Christian let her know that he was just behind the door. She opened the door, and Christian entered the room, only to freeze on himself when he saw the scenery behind the blonde girl.

There was a man in a hotel robe, laying on the floor, faintly bleeding from his stomach. From where he was, Christian couldn't say if the man was still alive or not, but he knew that, given the amount of blood on the floor, he was unconscious.

It took Christian a couple of seconds to regain control of himself and get over his shock, and the first thing he did was take his gun out of his back, before checking the en-suite bathroom. Nobody was there, and the windows were clear as well. Only then, he leaned to check on the man. He still had a pulse, though it was faint, and, as Christian's fingers were on the man's neck, he recognised him for being a senator.

He didn't know him per se, but he knew him enough to know his profession and his political views, which were far from the ones Raymond had. With his gun, he moved a little the robe, only to check the wound, and saw that it was gun made and that the bullet was still probably inside, stopping the blood from really gushing out of the wound. It was only then that he looked up to the blonde girl, his eyebrow up as he expected her to explain the situation.

"I didn't know who else to call! I didn't do it, and I don't want to be accused of doing it," She said, with a voice that Christian judged as far too calm for someone who admittedly just saw an attempt of murder. But then again, her voice had been as calm when she had called him to ask for his help.

Still, there was something in her that made him believe her. "I didn't say you did it. You didn't touch him, right?"

"To leave my fingerprints all over a dead guy?"

"You didn't … physically engage with him?"

"Not yet …."

Christian nodded as he got up, and called the only person he knew he could trust, no matter what. Jose answered after the second ring, but it wasn't the voice that Christian had expected to hear,

"Jose's phone?"

"Is Jose around?" Christian asked, repressing a smile at the thought of Jose enjoying his night off the same way he had been supposed to. Which reminded him that he would have to text Ana to let her know that it would be best if she spent the night at Katherine's.

There was a commotion on the other end of the phone, and Jose's voice finally echoed, "Christian?"

"I have a situation. I need you to come meet me at the Hilton on Sixth Avenue. I'll explain when you'll get here."

Jose let him know that he would be here in less than half an hour, and Christian went back to the man on the floor. He longly observed his respiration, wondering if he would have to cover a murder, or simply an attempt of murder, and and finally he looked up to Mia and asked her,

"What happened?"

"It wasn't me!"

"You already told me that. Now tell me why there is a bleeding man on the floor, and don't forget anything, or I'm walking out of this room."

"I came, on time as usual, and went to the bathroom, because … he asks that I dress a certain way, first. I was changing, when I heard another man's voice, which I thought nothing of, at first. I just figured he invited one of his buddies, like he often does. But then, they started arguing, and I heard a body falling on the floor. It took me forever to come check up on him, because I was scared the other guy was still in the room."

"You didn't hear the gunshot?" Christian inquired, and Mia shook her head.

"I don't think so. I … I was just scared, and I didn't know who else to call. And I remembered that you said that you would help me …"

"That's not the kind of help I had in mind," Christian highlighted, walking where the senator's briefcase was.

He opened it and looked inside, hoping to find some clues as to who would want to kill this senator so badly. But he didn't find really alarming, only political papers, all throughout the briefcase. Which led Christian to think that Mia had found herself caught in the midst of either a political mess, either some personal business that the senator had well hidden from the public eye.

He looked back at the blonde girl, and when he saw her all calm and composed, he pointed out to her, "You don't look so scared to me, for someone who just witnessed an attempt of murder."

The girl glared at him, crossing her arms over her chest as she reminded him something crucial about her, "It's my job to display a certain face and to conceal what I am really feeling."

Christian internally nodded, feeling a bit like a goof for his earlier comment, but he actually noted that when anger was colouring her voice, there was a faint accent. He couldn't tell for sure where it was from, but she hid it very well because it was the first time he actually heard it.

With a little sigh, Christian walked through the room still looking for a clue of what had transpired here between the senator, and whomever attacked him, when Jose called him to let him know that he was in the lobby. Christian told him to wait there, and headed to the door, not without letting Mia know that he would soon be back. He distinguished a faint panic gleaming in her eyes, and so he assured her,

"I'll be _right back_. I just need to go get someone who can help. You should actually put your coat on, we won't stay long afterwards."

Then, he left the room and took the elevator down to meet Jose in the lobby. As soon as he saw Christian, Jose got up from the armchair he was sitting in, and Christian walked them toward the stairs that they took, since he knew it would give him a little more time to explain everything to his friend.

Jose didn't interrupt Christian all the while Christian was explaining about Mia calling him and being probably in the middle of a political mess; and when Christian was done, and that there were still a few floors remaining, he asked,

"Why did she call _you_?"

"What do you mean?"

"Isn't she supposed to call the number on the card. Why did she even have your number?

"Oh, that? I didn't have any card when I saw her, so I gave her my number."

Jose nodded, but something in his attitude made Christian stop in the middle of his ascension toward the room where Mia was waiting for them. He stopped Jose as well, and rose an eyebrow, silently asking his friend to explain his words, or what he wouldn't say, in that case.

"Well … This is actually _my_ job. Before looking after Ana. My main job is to help working girls and boys out of the business and help them be in control of their lives once again. I do other things as well, but now is not the time to talk about that."

"Why didn't you tell me before what you were really doing?" Christian asked.

He had always known that Jose was doing more than being a glorified baby-sitter for Ana, and that he never really knew the true nature of Jose's primary job. But he had always assumed it was because Jose was doing something rather similar to him, and that Raymond didn't want to put all his eggs all in the same basket. He never would have thought that Jose was doing something so simple and altruist, and never tell him about it.

For a moment, Jose looked down, his brows furrowed, as if he was evaluating the situation, and if he should tell his best friend the reason why he never explained the true nature of his working relationship with their boss. He seemed really conflicted, before he started walking up the stairs, letting Christian know,

"Maybe, one day, I will tell you how I came to work for Raymond."

Christian followed, knowing that he would have to be satisfied with the answer for the time being, but not liking what his guts were telling him. Still, he did not pressure his friend on telling him more, feeling that this was something Jose had to open up about on his own time.

They walked the remaining couple of floors in silence, and when Christian opened the room, he found Mia by the door, ready to go whilst the senator was still laying on the floor.

"_Shit_! That's Senator Kingsley!" Jose cried out, closing the door behind him, and rushing to the man on the floor.

Christian tried to recall who was this senator in particular, and what grief Raymond held against him, but all he came up with was the latest bill the senator was trying to install, "The gun-control guy?"

Jose nodded, looking at the wound with the exact same precautions that Christian used previously. Christian furrowed his brows, now doubting that this was a political situation. "That doesn't make any sense. Killing the guy with a gun helps his cause more than hurts it."

"I don't know. Maybe it's personal. His wife maybe?"

Christian glanced at Mia who was still by the door, and obviously only waiting for them to tell her that they should go. He shook his head, and informed his friend, "Mia heard another man's voice. And if it was his wife, she would have looked for the girl."

"Did you find the shell-case?" Jose asked, and when Christian shook his head, he got up, saying, "Then, it was probably professional. Did you hear the gun shot?"

Mia shook her head, crossing her arms as she told them, "I heard something, but it wasn't as loud as I thought a gunshot would be."

Jose and Christian exchanged looks, perfectly aware that they were dealing with someone who knew what he was doing, and who probably let Mia alive on purpose, for her to take the blame.

"Do you want to drink something? Tea? Hot cocoa? Whiskey?"

"No. I just want to go and stay clear from this mess," She said, pointing the senator with her chin.

Jose nodded, scratching his chin, before he told her, "You should probably check if you didn't leave anything in the bathroom."

Mia looked about to protest when Jose gave her a pointed look. She stomped to the bathroom, and as soon as the door was shut, Jose turned to Christian, and asked him, "What are we going to do? We can't let him die like that."

"I suggest that I shoot at the window. Someone will definitely hear this gunshot, and will ultimately call 911."

"What about the girl?"

"We take her with us. It's not a problem. I have shut down the cameras when I came here. We won't let her take the fall for that."

Jose furrowed his brows, apparently unsure of the plan that Christian was proposing, and he pointed out the flaws that he was seeing in this course of action, "If the Senator is brought to the hospital, police is sure to question him, and let him know who called. If we let cheer luck call 911, we have a good chance that whomever calls will give a full on deposition, and Mia will be screwed."

"What do you mean?"

"The police will tell the senator who called on 911, and he is definitely going to complain to Mia's pimp that she did not help him when he was in danger. I don't think I need to tell you how vicious pimps can be when it comes to keep their clientele happy."

Christian frowned, pacing through the room in search of another solution for he hadn't thought for a second about the reaction Mia's current employer would have if she were to suddenly disappear. He looked through the window, hearing Jose coming closer to him.

"You should let her call in 911," He said, making Christian shake his head.

"If she calls them, she is doomed to go back there."

"She makes an anonymous call. So when the police will talk to him, they will tell him that it was a girl who made an anonymous call. He will surely understand, and will have no reason to get the pimp involve."

Christian thought about it for a second, agreeing to this plan, though a part of him had decided that he would pay a visit to Senator Kingsley in the morning, just to be sure that he would leave Mia alone.

"It's the best solution, Christian," Jose argued, seeing his friend's reluctance to put this plan in motion. "The Senator obviously knows who shot him, he knows it's not Mia. Don't give him the same escape goat that his assailant tried to have."

Christian nodded, his eyes still at the window, looking at New York's skyline by night. "I'll call Luke in the morning for him to do a little digging on our good Senator, and who has the mean to ice him with such good timing. In the mean time … What do we do with her?"

"We help her get her life back," Jose simply stated, closing the curtains. Christian didn't say anything, but to him, this seemed like an impossible thing to do. He had no problems dealing with thugs and dealers, he had no problems icing someone when it was needed, or threatening someone until that person bended the way he wanted. But he had no idea how he could help someone who had be lead to believe that she was nothing more than a piece of meat, only there to entertain someone else's pleasure.

His worry must have been apparent, because Jose tapped his shoulder in a friendly and conciliate way, and reassured him, "It's not as bad as one would think."

Christian shook his head, walking to the bathroom, as he reminded something crucial to his friend, "I am not as compassionate as you, Jose. Empathy is not really my thing."

Jose didn't retort anything, because both of them knew that it was the truth, even if he Jose had several times argued with Christian on that particular topic. Christian knocked at the bathroom door, who immediately flew open, and Mia was standing there, all fresh and ready to go. Which she asked the second she opened the door.

"In a few minutes. We just need you to call in 911 on the Senator, and then, we're out of here."

"You want _my_ voice to be registered as the one who called to say that a senator was shot in this hotel room? Are you insane?"

Christian repressed a smirk, though he was surprised on how quick Mia seemed to always think of the legal point-of-view of things. But he assured her that she would be safe, "It's just so Kingsley doesn't consider going after you. You do this, and I will make sure that you're safe afterwards."

"Like I haven't heard that one before," She snapped back, her voice filled with disbelief.

Jose intervened, seeing that Christian was doing a very poor job. "It's not what you think, Mia. It's not the lie you heard over and over again that _he_ will keep you safe. We will give you the means so _you_ can do that yourself. It's only up to you to take that step in that direction and regain that life that was stolen from you."

She seemed hesitant for a moment, internally balancing the pros and the cons to take that leap of faith with those two men that she had never seen before in her life. And then, with a heavy sigh, she walked to the phone beside the bed, and pressed the three numbers to call the emergencies.

Christian witnessed how she passed from disarming calm, to historical in the blink of an eye, and a quick thought went through his mind that she should try pursuing a career in the acting business, she clearly knew how to act.

Once her statement was made, she hang up, and they left the room. Christian glanced at his watch, reading that barely an hour had passed, and as they rode the elevator down, Christian asked the blonde girl, "Around what time was Kingley shot?

"Five minutes before I called you."

Christian nodded, wondering what sort of life she could have had before to remain so calm and act so rationally in a situation that would make most people squeamish and hysterical.

The three of them went to Magnu's car, which made frown Christian when he did not recognise Jose's black Volvo. Instead, it was a red Saab convertible, one of the latest model. He didnt even need to ask Jose about it, that his friend automatically explained as he lowered the driver's seat to let Mia in, "I wasn't home when you called."

Christian smirked, sitting at the passenger seat as he said, "Opposite definitely attracts."

Jose ignored him, but the truth remained. Jose didn't like to bring attention to himself, and was rather reserved, which didn't seem to be Ethan's case. His car alone was saying so. He liked to be seen, and he liked the fine things.

The ride was rather silent, and Christian tried to figure out what to do with Mia during the most part of it. He figured that he would take her at his place for the time being to find her an apartment and a job, even though that meant that he wouldn't see Ana for a while. As this thought occurred to her, he recalled with horror that he didn't text her to not wait for him, and sent a quick text to apologise,

**I got caught up with a last minute thing. I'm so sorry. I will make it up to you in Paris. Promise. C**

When Jose pulled over in the parking lot of Christian's building, Mia closed her arms across her chest, refusing to get out of the car. "What are you going to do with me?"

"Well, given the hour, I figured you'd like a nice night of sleep in a comfortable bed before we start taking about anything else."

Mia squinted her eyes at Jose, apparently not reassured the least in the world by his words, before she blurted out, "Do I have to sleep with one of you?"

Christian's saliva went into the wrong pipe when the words left Mia's mouth, but it only seemed to amuse Jose. "We're not into busty blondes, lucky you."

Mia still did not move, and so Jose crouched so his eyes could be at her level. "We said that we would help you, Mia. And I know it is hard to believe that strangers you know nothing about could want to help you, of all people. But sometimes, miracles happen. Sometimes, people care, even if you think they don't, even if you think that you don't deserve it.

We won't force you to follow us. If you want to try it your way, we can stop at the ground floor, give you some money, and you'll never hear from us again. But … it will be easier with us. We can give you food and bedding until you find your way."

"That sounds like a debt to me," She suspiciously countered.

"Or maybe we just like to help people because we have the means to do it. Not every rich man is an asshole. Some like to help those in need. We happen to work for one of them."

"I can leave whenever I want?"

"You can sleep tonight and leave in the morning if you want," Jose assured, and it seemed enough for Mia to get out of the car.

She followed Christian and Jose to the elevator, and to Christian's surprise, Jose pressed the button to the second floor. He exchanged a look with his friend who discreetly shook his head, letting him know that he would explain later. Once at the floor, Jose went to one of the apartment there, and opened it with one of his keys, before letting Mia enter first. She did, still obviously suspicious of everything, and Jose let her know,

"There should be food in the fridge, and everything you could need for a hot shower, and a soundless night. The other key to this apartment is on the counter of the kitchen, and if you decide to stay, I will give you this one as well. Do you have any question that can't wait for tomorrow?"

Mia shook her head, and though she was doing her best to hide it, Christian saw how relieved she was that none of them tried to enter the flat with her. The two of them wished her goodnight, and walked back to the elevator, hearing distinctively the safety lock being pulled as soon as Mia closed the door.

Once in the elevator, Jose immediately explained before Christian could even think of grilling him, "This whole floor is always empty. The apartments are here for people like Mia who got caught in the web of prostitution, and who want to get out. Most people working for this industry want to get out, but they can't. Because they don't have the means to pay for an apartment whilst studying to do what they want, or even finding a work.

Raymond pays for the food, the clothes, let them stay as long as they need to, and never asks for a cent back. There had been a couple of cases when the person had been more damaged, and had been in need of a shrink, that Raymond paid for without the blink of an eye. He also pays for the school when they want to go back to school, and when he can, he helps them find a job. There is a girl who is an assistant manager at Esclava, another who is a waitress at Mile High, and there is Madeline …"

"Madeline used to be a hooker?" Christian asked, with incredibility. Madeline was Eamon's personal assistant at Robinson Inc', and never he would have suspected that she had such a dark past.

"How come Raymond is so concerned with this cause?" Christian wondered out loud. He knew his boss's position concerning the sex-trade, but never he would have suspected him to go to such lengths.

They stopped at the Kavanagh's level, both going out for Christian thought he would take the stairs for the few remaining floors.

"Honestly, it's not my place to tell. And I don't think it is something Raymond will share with you on his own either … And anyway, this whole helping girls to get back on their feet is more of an Elena thing."

"Elena?"

"She's the one who started all of it. I'm just following her footsteps. If you want to know more about this whole infrastructure, you will have to talk to her. I'm sure she will be more insightful that I could ever be," Jose explained, stopping in front of Ethan's front door.

Christian glanced toward the apartment door that was leading to the Kavanagh's main apartment, internally vowing that he would ask Elena about this whole system that she built to help people in need. It wasn't because he was no good at showing empathy and compassion, that it meant that he couldn't learn how others did it. And maybe even, in the future, do like Raymond and be a silent helper through donations.

The two friends said their goodbye, not without setting a time of meeting the next day in the morning to go see Mia. When he entered in his apartment a wave of exhaustion came through Christian, but he dismissed it. He took notice of the door not being locked, but he put that on the account of Ana having come in the flat, and left to go to her friend's afterwards.

He boiled himself some water to drink his camomile, and called Raymond as he waited for his infusion to cool down a little. As he expected it, his boss answered, despite the late hour of he night, and so Christian immediately let him know the reason of his call,

"I know this is late, but I came upon … an unusual situation. Well, for me it is."

"What do you mean?"

"An escort called me tonight," Christian started, before letting Raymond know all about Mia and the situation the poor girl found herself in. The older man did not interrupt him once, letting Christian finish his tale, and he did so by saying, "I'd like to follow up on this one, Boss. I know that Jose is the one who normally handles these situations, but I want to know how those situations are handled. Even if I don't do a thing, I want to help Jose on this one."

There was a long silent, that made Christian feel uncomfortable for he felt that he had crossed a line with his superior. But in the end, Raymond simply told him, "We'll talk about it tomorrow. Just sleep for tonight, we'll have a discussion about that tomorrow at the mansion, for lunch."

Christian agreed and hung up, before going upstairs, ready to hit his pillow. He passed by his bathroom to take a quick shower, feeling dirty with all that Senator business. Once out of the shower, he checked his messages, and saw that Luke had texted him the address of the hospital where the Senator had been admitted to, with a little side message saying that no visitors were allowed, though Christian knew that this wouldn't stop him from seeing the Senator the next day.

He was walking to his room, when he noticed that the door of another room was slightly ajar, which made him frown. He rarely used that particular room. He opened widely the door, and saw Ana curled up on the quilted carpet, a children book next to her. With all the precautions in the world, Christian took her in his arms and took her to his bedroom, before putting her in the bed, and laying next to her.

Softly, he caressed her hair out of her face, feeling incredibly guilty for standing her up, when they already got to spend so little time together. He assumed that he had sent his text too late, and that she had already fallen asleep in the other room, probably wandering in there out of boredom. This made him reflect on the fact that this was probably bound to happen again, and that he should be more receptive and quicker as to warn her if he were to cancel a night between the two of them.

Ana mumbled something incomprehensible in her sleep, before snuggling against Christian, and he embraced her against his heart, kissing her hair as he whispered,

"I'm sorry."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

When Christian woke up the next morning, he stayed in bed for a few minutes, Ana snuggled in his arms. He was still feeling bad for bailing on her during the previous night, which was the reason why he decided to simply take a shower, and go back to bed, unlike his usual mornings where he would workout and have his little routine while waiting for Ana to awake.

Once back in bed, he checked his phone, looking for articles in the news saying that Kingley had been hospitalised. But strangely enough, it seemed that the media still didn't know anything about it. Though Christian couldn't tell if it was Luke's doing, or the Senator who was doing everything in his power to keep it quiet.

For a whole hour, Christian answered a few emails on his phone, and organised his day, all the while texting a couple of people of what he expected them to do for the day; and when Ana started stirring in her bed, he put down his mobile and gave his attention wholly to the brunette.

He watched her struggle to open her eyes and when she finally did, her surprised blue orbs settled on him, blinking several time before she found the will to sit down on the bed. For a second, she did not say anything, before he mouth formed a pout as she declared,

"You bailed on me!"

"I know. I'm sorry. Something unexpected came up," Christian apologised, easing the pout out of her face with his thumb.

He saw the frown deepening in her brows, and so he swiftly kissed her before she could complain even more about his poor planning of the previous night. For a second, he thought that she would push him away, but then, she wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him back, melting under his touch.

When they broke their embrace, Christian leant his forehead against her, sweetly smiling to her, and a soft unconvinced pout reformed on her sweet red lips.

"Your place isn't fun when you aren't around. You need at least a TV."

Christian softly shook his head with a small smile on his lips, and he argued, "I don't need a TV. I need to plan my nights better when you come visit."

"So you don't intend on bailing on me again?"

"I intend on not letting you know last second, so you can rebounce on something better than giving yourself a tour of my apartment."

For a second, she seemed embarrassed by his words, and Christian could clearly see why. He never took the time to show her around his place, so her visiting it whilst he was away could be taken as an invasion of privacy. But he didn't see it like that, far from it. He was actually rather anxious at the question that she was now bound to ask after having found his special room the night before.

"I was _really_ bored. There is literally nothing to do here except reading the newspaper and drinking tea. You're such an old man," She complained, making Christian laugh against himself. Ana liked to regularly complain that he was acting like her Grandfather. It actually became a tease between them, that always brought a smile on Christian's face.

"I was wondering …" She started hesitant and avoiding eye contact with him. Christian waited for her to talk, and finally she asked the question that must have been burning her lips since the night before, "Do you have an illegitimate child I know nothing about?"

Christian burst in laughter, expecting any sort of reaction, but this one. Though, now that he was thinking of it, it was the most reasonable one one could think of after having seen his room.

Ever since Christian had started working for Raymond and had had this apartment, he had picked this habit of indulging himself in children stuff. Anything he would see, and he had missed during his childhood, he would buy it, because he never wanted his future children to feel the lack of anything. And though he knew that what he lacked in love and affection growing up, would never happen to his children, he couldn't so sure for the material aspect. Which was why as life went along, he bought toys, books and furnitures, in the case if he were to ever be broke, his children would at least have the childhood he didn't have.

As he was still recovering from his outburst, Christian leant and kissed Ana's forehead, in an attempt of reassuring her. "I can assure you I don't have any child in my closet. It's just … a habit I picked up."

She frowned, getting up herself and following him to the kitchen, "A habit? That kind of habits is for psychopaths, you know? Did you ever thought of seeing a shrink?"

Christian chuckled, putting some water to boil. "I admit it can be a bit weird from your perspective, but you weren't meant to see it."

"You're weird," She simply said, looking at him suspiciously.

For a moment, Christian thought of letting it go as it went, but his instincts were telling him to explain to Ana what this room full of toys really meant to him. They sat in silence drinking their coffee and tea, when he took a deep inspiration through his nose,

"I don't think you can understand, Ana. You and I didn't have the same childhood. Your father loves you unconditionally, and I never had that. It makes us react and anticipate life differently."

"Of course you had it. You just don't remember it. Every parent loves their child unconditionally, Christian," She told him with a sweet voice, putting her hand over his.

"No, they dont. There are parents who don't love their children, Ana. Parents who don't care about what about to their children. It just seems impossible for you, because Raymond did a good job with you and loved you from the start."

"Christian … your parents didn't chose to die …"

"I … wasn't really straightforward with you … When I told you that my parents were dead, I meant that they are dead _to me_. The truth is, I don't know where they are, and I don't want to know. They left me to fend for myself when I was five, and it's all I need to know about them."

Ana looked at Christian with solemnity, making him wonder if he overshared something the he should have kept for himself, but then she simply gave him a small smile, and asked, "So … there was a guitar in the room … Does that mean that you can play?"

"A few songs."

"Will you ever play for me?"

"Whenever you want to," He promised, earning a frank bright smile from her.

It seemed that she was ready to put this topic behind them. They kept on eating, though Christian interrupted himself just to put some music because he knew that Ana didn't like it when it was too quiet. When he came back to sit next to her, she sat on his laps, facing him with a luscious smile on her face. Christian smiled back, kissing her passionately, but when her hands started wandering off to his waistband, he stopped her for he knew he was to leave soon.

She brusquely sat up, interrupting their kiss, her eyes squinted at him, before she left his laps and went back to her chair.

"I'm sorry, Ana. I have to leave soon, and I don't want either of us to get worked up for nothing."

"Sure," she said, clearly not believing him. They stayed silent for a moment, listening to the jazz in the background, before Ana snapped, "Actually, I have a question. Do you find me any attractive?"

Christian's eyes grew wide, having no idea where this question was coming from. "You're a beautiful woman, Ana. I thought you'd know that by now."

"It's not what I asked. I asked if _you_ found me attractive."

"Where is this coming from? Do you think I would risk being with you if I didn't?"

"I don't know, Christian. You never say anything, and … well, I'm always the one who initiates anything sexy."

Christian repressed his smirk, shaking his head before he picked her up and sat her on the table in front of him.

"If I were the one to initiate, you would spend all your time with me with your legs spread. And as much as the idea is appealing to me, I have a couple of reasons for not ramming into from the moment you pass through this door, to the moment you leave. First, I don't want you sore. Second, I like spending my time with you doing more for than just sex. I like spending time with you, even if it's doing simple mundane things."

"Oh," Was all she said, her cheeks slightly reddening. Christian scooped her closer to him, sensually kissing her neck as he admitted, "But it is true that I don't tell you these things. I will work on that. Or at least, I will try."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ Okay, so no cliffies, and a lot of obvious hints. Many many MANY of them, spread all over the place. Hope that makes you guys happy **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of ****Mia? And yes, she will be a recurring character with a somewhat importance to the plot, and the story. **

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Christian and ****Jose concerning the working girls and Raymond's position on that?**

**💚 What do you think about that little bit of Christian and Ana we had at the end?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_I am so glad that you're liking the story so far. And I can't wait for you to see how it evolves ... Hope you liked this chapter as well._

**Guest2: **_To be fair, there are so many clues, I don't expect you to pick on all of them, but this chapters holds a LOT! Haha. But I can't wait for you to read where I am taking you, and for you to be like 'Oh, I see them now!"_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	16. Chapter 15: Mia

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 15: Mia ****(6,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian left Ana that morning, he was feeling refreshed and renewed, which didn't go unnoticed by Jose who didn't hesitate on pointing it out,

"Seems like you had a good morning."

"Don't ask about things you don't want to know," Christian warned, mostly because he knew that the less Jose knew about Ana and him, the better he was.

Jose shook his head but didn't bounce on it, which Christian was grateful for. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk about him and Ana, but more that he never really had this sort of conversation with Jose, and that Jose seemed more insightful than Ryan on that sort of things. In the past, Christian had more than once shared his sexual experiences with his other friend, but since his conquests never meant much to him, he didn't think anything of it. Now that he was in a sort of relationship with Ana, it seemed that Jose was seeing things into it, that even Christian didn't see. Or at least, things that he didn't want to admit to himself.

On several occasions, Jose had hinted to Christian that he was getting too involved with a girl that he was supposed to only see occasionally to bond in the bed, and the latest example was what Christian wanted to do with Ana once they were in Paris, away from her father's eyes and ears. But of course, Jose being the person that he was didn't emit any sort of judgement. He just gave his opinion on how he thought this whole ordeal wasn't going to end well. Which Christian usually responded with telling his friend to lighten up, and stop being so pessimistic all the time.

Once in front of the apartment where they left Mia the night before, Christian rang at the bell, and he was surprised to see the door being opened not by the blonde girl, but by Elena Kavanagh. Jose, on the other hand, didn't seem that surprised by that turn of event.

"Hello, boys. We were waiting for you. We have a lot to discuss," She said with a bright smile, though it seemed to Christian that he was passing through the Spanish Inquisition when her green eyes landed on him.

"Hello, Elena. You're here up early," Jose noted as he entered the apartment.

Christian followed, and the three of them went to the living room where they found Mia having breakfast by the table. There were pastries of all sorts and two cups of hot coffee on the table. Elena sat in front of one of them, as she informed the newcomers,

"Ray called yesterday night to let me know about our newest resident. I thought I would surprise Mia with a nice breakfast."

The young girl brightly smiled at the mention of breakfast, taking a croissant as she sipped into a dark coffee; and the two men sat at the remaining places at the table. From the corner of his eyes, Christian observed Mia, and just by the way she was eating, he knew that she had known hunger once in her life. He knew because he was sure he had eaten the exact same way when Mrs Parvati had given him a free meal just out of the goodness of her heart.

"So I was talking to Mia before you came in, explaining to her what and why we do what we do, and we seem to have a little problem," Elena continued, clearly talking to Jose who was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

"We do?" He asked, his face showing concern as he turned to look at Mia, and she swallowed what she had in her mouth to let everyone at the table know,

"I want to meet your boss."

Jose seemed at a loss of words, whilst Elena simply drank from her coffee, surely already aware of Mia's demand. For a moment, a thick silence planned over the table, before Christian asked with a cold and demanding voice, "Why?"

"They why is none of your business."

"It is my business when you are asking me to arrange a meeting with my boss. How do I know you don't have ill-intentions?"

She narrowed her eyes at him, before shrugging and going back to her croissant, "It's okay. I'm sure I can find him in the Yellow Pages."

Christian's phone buzzed in his pocket at that moment, but he ignored it, his eyes still on the blonde girl. They silently fought until he broke their gaze, looking at the text he received

**Kingsley is at NYU Langone Medical Centre. No visitors allowed at the moment, not even family. His cause of admission is still unknown to the public. The nurse's shift ends at 11. Luke **

"You are not seeing my boss just because you wish to do so. Either you give me a good reason, either I am out of here. I don't have time to lose with delusional wishes," Christian warned, his eyes still on the screen as he was texting a thank you message to Luke.

He was about to get up, when Mrs Kavanagh intervened, "Christian … you should —"

"I should nothing, Mrs Kavanagh. With all due respect, I don't see why we should comply with _her_ demands. We helped her, sheltered her and we're willing to do more. I am not putting my boss at risk, or wasting his time just for the whim of a girl."

As he said his words, he got up, and so did Mia, exclaiming, "I want to thank the man in person. Is that so abnormal? I want to look at him in the eye and thank him for all he's about to do for me. It's normal to thank your benefactor where I am from."

Christian noticed that once again, her original accent came back as anger struck her voice, which made him smile involuntarily. He noticed the brief look that Jose and Mrs Kavanagh exchanged, but didn't dwell on it. He still had several things to do before the day peaked, and he didn't have time to linger on this relationship between them that he was discovering.

"Well, it wasn't that hard to tell, was it. I'll pick you up at half-past twelve for lunch. So you'll get to bat your lashes and say your thank yous. Be on time." Then, he turned his head to the other woman at the table, and politely nodded his head to her, "Mrs Kavanagh."

After briefly exchanging a look with Jose, he left, checking the time on his watch and hating the fact that he would have to speed on the road. He actually liked to drive, and speed had never been an issue for him but he didn't like to drive in New York. There was always so much circulation, and every time he made an acceleration, there was a traffic light to stop him.

Still, he made it to the hospital, just in time to use the nurses' shift in his advantage. With the stealth that was due to years of experience, Christian managed to go to the Senator's room undetected, which came as a surprise to the man in the bed.

"_Who are you_?" He cried out, sitting up on his bed and reaching for his phone.

In the blink of an eye, Christian was by his side stopping him from calling anyone. Kingsley longly analysed him, before recognition gleamed in his eyes, and Christian used that to sit in the chair by the bed.

"I doubt that Raymond would stoop as low as to have me kill in a hospital bed."

"Who said I am here on Raymond's behalf?" Christian coldly said, because after all, Raymond had always done his best to stay away from Senator Kingsley's business. He wasn't a politician that could be swayed, and his views on certain aspects of politics and life directly clashed with Raymond's views.

"Then, why are you here? Did you get a sudden wakeup call, and decided to abandon this life of crime he swayed you to?"

Christian smirked because this was something he heard quite often. It seemed that no one could understand that Christian _liked_ this life of crime that Raymond had offered him. He liked it and liked excelling at it. It never occurred to him that he might be missing on something, or that what he was doing was morally wrong. He liked his life as it was, no matter how bad it might seem in another person's eyes.

"I am the one who saved your life, Senator. A little gratitude wouldn't be a spoil, you know."

"Oh … So you're the guy the hooker called to get her out of troubles. Isn't Raymond a big advocate against that kind of thing? If I have to give him one thing, it's that."

Christian rose his eyebrow at the Senator, fully aware that one of the main reasons why Raymond never tried to work with the man was for his taste for young working girls. The Senator had a small laugh at Christian's expression, and he explained his point-of-view,

"It's not because I walk on the dark side from time to time, that I don't admire those who fight against it."

"Who went after you?" Christian asked, not in the mood to go into the small talks the Senator was trying to lead him to. Kingsley shook his head, and said,

"It is none of your business. It is a personal matter, and I'd like to keep it that way."

"It stopped being personal the moment I got involved. Either you tell me now and I can help you with it, either I will dig into your sordid life, and drag you into the dirt when I will find out."

"Well, it seemed that the ward surpassed the master. You're less lenient than him when it comes to —"

"I certainly have less patience than him when it comes to small talks," Christian cut him off with temper. "Who was after you? I don't even care why. I just want a name."

"Why? What is it to you to know who tried to kill me? I am actually not on your good side when it comes to many of your side businesses."

Christian didn't say anything, keeping his eyes hard on the Senator as he was wondering how he was going to make him bend his way. But then, Kingsley started looking at him in a different way, "Unless … Could it be because of the hooker?"

He didn't try to argue on anything, not wanting Kingsley to get anything on him or anything that could incriminate Mia. But he still saw the little smile that the Senator had, apparently sure that he had something on Christian. He didn't need to read crystal balls to see that Kingsley thought that he and Mia were in some sort of relationship. And if this was going to help him get the information he wanted, he was not going to contradict him.

"I know that she has nothing to do with the attempt that was made on my life. She was probably the scapegoat. And as long as she will keep that little … inconvenience for herself, I will let her be. She has nothing to fear from me."

"It seems that your hearing got affected by your wound. I want a name."

"And I told you that I was not giving it to you. You have to keep up, son, if you want to stay in the business."

Christian repressed a heave of annoyance and smirked at the Senator in the bed. Then, he got up and slowly walked to the window to close the curtains. With the same slowness, he went to lock the door and then walked back to the Senator.

"I think it is you who need to keep up, Senator. I am in your room, and no one knows about it. Not the nurse, not the police, not your PR, no one. If you were to have a _complication_ in your recovery, no one would be able to link me to you, and that greasy ladder that you climbed during all those years would be all for nothing. When you are dead, nothing else matters than the dirt surrounding your corpse …"

Christian watched the Senator swallow with difficulty before sinking back in the chair and asking once again, "The name?"

"It was my brother," Kingsley finally admitted, though it was against his will. "Or at least, a professional hired by my brother."

Christian nodded and got up to draw the curtains back and unlock the door, he was about to leave without saying a word, when Kingsley stopped him, "You're not asking why?"

"I already told you, the hows and the whys don't interest me." Christian opened the door, but stopped himself when he had a foot outside, and turned his head to the Senator.

"Senator? I will keep you on your promise to not get the girl involved. And like you said earlier, I am not my boss. If I feel like she's in danger because of you, I won't use the option where you get a fair warning first."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

After his little visit to the Senator, Christian went to see a couple of dealers who ought to give Raymond the benefits that their products got them and then called Ryan so they could set up a meeting to receive the next shipment. As he was driving back to his building to pick up Mia, Christian thought that he ought to pay Eamon a visit in the afternoon, just to make sure the merger was going well, and therefore he was still off to Paris with Ana.

When he arrived in front of Mia's apartment, he barely had to knock that the door was opened by Mia shortly followed by the Kavanagh matriarch who gently smiled at Christian as she let him know, "I haven't seen Raymond in a while. I'm coming with you so I can have lunch with him."

Christian nodded, not saying a word as the two girls followed him to the elevator and then to the parking lot. But once there, they found three people that Christian wasn't expecting to see. The two eldest Kavanagh and Ana were on their way to Ethan's red Saab. Still, he did as if nothing and went to his own car, whilst Mrs Kavanagh made her way to her children.

"Mom! What are you doing here?" Katherine asked with surprise before her eyes fell on Christian and Mia. Her brother embraced their mother, his eyes also going to Christian with confusion as Christian was opening the back door to let Mia inside the car.

He saw how Ana was avoiding looking in his direction, all smiles for her Godmother who was wondering about her whereabouts, "What are you up to? Troubles?"

"We're going to check this new restaurant who just opened in Manhattan. Nothing drastic, Mom," Ethan said, half rolling his eyes as he got in the driver's seat. Elena smiled at her children, before looking at Ana.

"Does your father know you're going out on your own like that?"

"I'm sure he knows somehow …" Ana trailed, making Elena shake her head softly as she told the brunette,

"I won't say anything and spoil your fun. Just be careful, or your father will have my head."

"As if Dad could ever be mad at you," Ana countered, rolling her eyes the same way Ethan did a few minutes before.

She got in the car, not sparing a single glance in the direction of Christian who stayed as impassible as he usually was when he was outside his apartment. He climbed in the car, waiting for Mrs Kavanagh to finish her conversation with her daughter, the two of them talking about font and paper for the marriage invitation.

"Those are Elena's children?" Mia asked in a whisper from the back seat, and Christian nodded, though he added,

"The two blonds. The brunette is her Goddaughter."

"There is a lot of love going on between all of them," She pointed out, and Christian couldn't argue with that. Mrs Kavanagh loved Ana the same way she loved her children, it showed. Or maybe he was more receptive of that love because he didn't have that growing up.

He was torn out of his thoughts by hearing his name out of Katherine's mouth, "What are you doing with Christian, anyway?"

"He and his friend are having lunch with Raymond. I thought I'd tag along," Elena mindlessly said, and this allowed Christian to know that her children had no idea of what she was doing when they were out, and when they used to be in school.

But still, this wasn't the first thought that came to his mind. The first thing he thought of was Ana, and how this particular sentence might sound weird to her ear. Which was why he immediately sent her a text, not wanting her to overthink, the same way she overthought that whole engaging intercourse thing.

**It is just work, Ana. Don't let your imagination take you places it shouldn't go. Christian **

The answer was immediate, making Christian wish he could simply walk over and tell her in the eyes that she should stop worrying over nothing.

**Is she the reason why you came late yesterday night? Ana**

Just as he received the text, Mrs Kavanagh came into the car, allowing him to simply text the answer before he started to drive.

**Yes. But like I just said, it was just work. Christian **

Christian let the Kavanagh leave the parking lot first before he drove on the way to the Steele mansion. On their way, Mrs Kavanagh mindlessly told Christian that Raymond didn't need to know about their meeting with her children, which made got Christian thinking about Raymond and his overprotectiveness toward his daughter. It seemed that none of the Kavanagh shared the same feeling toward their own children, so why was Raymond so protective of Ana. Sure the loss of his wife had probably taken a toll on him and on his trust of other people, but it seemed to Christian that there was something more.

But Christian didn't get much time to reflect on the matter as Luke called him whilst he was still driving through the streets of New York. Christian made sure that his hand-off kit was properly set before he picked up the call.

"Grey," He said, knowing that Luke would immediately understand that he wasn't alone and therefore able to speak freely. It was a code amongst several of them to only answer with their family name when they had company and had to watch what they were saying.

"Do you want me to call you back later, or you can still hear what I have to say?"

"Go ahead."

"I don't think the Senator will be a problem. I don't know what he told you, but I really think that it was some kind of family issue. His father died a couple of years ago, and he's getting all the fortune. His brother sued him for taking everything, and the verdict was pronounced a week ago that he lost. It would have been perfect with his anti-gun bill at the corner, everyone would have assumed it was something political. But Kingsley seems to just have bad blood in his family," Luke explained in what Christian knew to be a very summed up resume of what he had found of the Kingsley family.

"Some brother…" Christian muttered, earning a scoff of agreement from Luke.

"I honestly don't think we need to get involved. He's trying to keep all of that hush-hush. He made the hospital sign NDA, and his PR is keeping the media away."

"Good. Just find me something to give me the upper hand. Just in case," Christian asked, and when Luke assured him that he was on it, Christian hung up, focusing solely on the road.

He heard Mrs Kavanagh talk to her husband on the phone, but he blocked the noise, leaving her some privacy, the same way Mia did by turning her head and looking through the window. When they pulled over by the mansion, Christian repressed his smirk as Mia looked dumbfounded at the estate. The first time he came to see Raymond at his place, he probably had the same reaction. _How can one man need so much space_?

Raymond was waiting for them by the dining room, and they all sat around the table while Mrs Jones, the cook, served them their food. Christian remained silent while Mrs Kavanagh filled the conversation with small talks about her daughter's upcoming wedding, and the weather. And once they were alone, she finally talked about their surprised guest.

As Christian listened to her, he learnt a few things about Mia. She was twenty-two and from Bulgaria. She has been in the US since she was sixteen, and came upon the promise that someone would help her become a lawyer. Mia didn't give the name of her employer, only stating that she was a woman as well and that she didn't want to get on her bad side. As Mrs Kavanagh kept telling Mia's story, Christian looked at her, something simple and obvious suddenly striking him down.

Mia was barely older than Ana. If one looked carefully at her face, one could still see some innocence in her features. And still, she had been a working girl for over six years now. Christian had never really lingered on how a prostitute would feel about herself, but listening to Mrs Kavanagh talk about how they could get Mia get her dream job, he felt bad for taking his luck for granted. After all, he was lucky, he was a guy. If he had been a girl, who could say what he would have had done when he lived in the streets.

"I know a professor at NYU who can probably make you enrol this late into the year. It just might be harder to keep up," Raymond said, picking the sauce left in his plate with his bread.

And finally, Mia who didn't look up from her plate once during the whole meal, looked up to Raymond, though her eyes never went to his, which Christian understood. For someone who didn't know him, Raymond didn't seem like someone to cross, and was inspiring fear in the heart of his interlocutor.

"I wanted to thank you, sir. For … sending help my way. And I really appreciate what you want to do, but … I can't accept," She said, making Raymond frown a little. He glanced at his friend, before he inquired,

"Why?"

"I would feel like in debt to you if you paid for my food, and school and gave me the apartment."

Christian could see her point-of-view, and wondered if this was an issue that had already been brought up. He felt his pocket vibrate and checked his phone under the table, seeing that Luke had sent him the information he wanted on Kingsley. He also saw with horror that Ana had texted him and that he had not given suite to their little conversation

**Work seems to have a really pretty face **😒**… Ana **

**You are overthinking this whole thing, Ana. Even if I end up working with 'really pretty faces', I already have my eyes set on one particular brunette. brunette who almost made me late this morning with her shenanigans … Christian **

"There is no debt to think about. I don't expect anything from you, Mia," Raymond explained as Christian was typing his text. Mia furrowed her brows, as if she was looking for her words, and countered,

"I know, Elena explained it all to me this morning. But … It's more about me, no matter how selfish that sounds. No matter what, I would feel like I owe you. I already feel like I owe you my freedom. I just … Maybe I could pay you back once I started working. It might take some time, but it would make me feel better."

Though he kept his face unreadable, Christian was confused. He couldn't understand how Mia could feel in debt when people around her kept on telling her that she owed nothing to no one. She heard it from Raymond himself that she was clear of debts, so why would she still feel like she owed the man something.

His phone buzzed again in his hand, and he repressed a smile when he saw that Ana took the bait and dropped the Mia issue.

**Oh, you don't like brunette's shenanigans? I seem to recall a certain someone being in a hurry to nail me against the door. Couldn't even wait to get me into bed like any gentlemen would have done! Ana **

**Gentlemen are boring in bed. Gentlemen get ladies in bed. I, on the other hand, I get you. Naughty, freaky and very vocal (all qualities VERY appreciated). Christian **

"There could be a solution to this conundrum …" Christian proposed as he pressed sent to his text.

Very briefly a part of his mind chastised him for playing with fire and texting dirty messages to his boss's daughter when he was barely two feet away. But he dismissed the thought as quickly as it came. With a small breath, he looked up and proposed, "Mia wants to be a lawyer, and we're always looking for new blood in that area." He then looked at Mia, "You let us pay for your education, and when you passed the bar you work for us."

As the interested parties pondered on his proposition, he quickly glanced at his phone, before swiftly putting it in his pocket when he saw that Ana had sent him a picture of herself in a revealing piece of lingerie. It was definitely a dangerous game to send naughty messages to her when her father was at arm's length.

"This seems like something I can work with," Raymond agreed, and Mia nodded her agreement s well.

It seemed that the topic was over, and they all started eating the lemon meringue pie for dessert when Raymond checked his phone and let Elena know,

"The more we approach the wedding date, the more Ana wanted to stay with Kate. She just texted me to let me know she's staying there tonight."

"You know my position on that matter, Raymond," Elena said with a tone that Christian judged as cold given that it was one friend talking to the other. Still, Christian noted that Ana was not going back to the mansion tonight, though he wasn't sure that she would stay with him or not, since she didn't tell him anything about it.

"I would get lonely in that big house all by myself," Raymond said, though even Christian could say that he half meant those words.

Elena gave him a lot that held more than words before she got up and proposed to Mia to go do some shopping. The two of them left, and once they were alone, Raymond got up, immediately followed by Christian to his office.

"I would have told you about this side of the business, Christian. I was just waiting for you to be older."

"Older?"

"There are things that we take with more … maturity as we're older. Plus, this is something that I wanted Elena to introduce you to. She is the real brain behind all of this, I am just the wallet."

Christian nodded, seeing that once again people were referring to Elena for him to understand, without saying anything else. But it wasn't what he lingered on. He actually focused on how it seemed more and more evident to him that Raymond was showing all aspects of his professional life. And he wasn't sure how he felt about that. He knew that he was the only one to have such a wide range of expertise, and the more he thought about it, the more it felt like Raymond was forming him to take over at some point. But the problem was, Christian wasn't sure that he would be able to take the burden of the empire that Raymond built.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

The first thing that he noticed when he got home that night was a note on the kitchen counter, telling him that his presence was required in his bedroom.

**For some freaky, naughty and loud moments, **

**Come upstairs and make me behave **

**The brunette from this morning **😉

With a smile on his face, Christian almost flew upstairs, only to find Ana in blue lingerie laying on his bed. He strode to her, leaning to capture her lips with his, and she giggled beneath him, making him wish he could hear that sound over and over again. He broke their kiss only to look at her porcelain face, and she gave him a bright smile, before wiggling her eyebrows at him,

"You're supposed to make me behave," She said, tilting her head to the nightstand where handcuffs were put, alongside some whipped cream.

Christian rose an eyebrow, wondering if those were something that she had always had, or if it was something that he recently bought. After all, Ana had always like it better when he was a bit rougher with her, and now that the handcuffs were introduced, he wondered if it meant that she was into another kind of sexual activities that he hadn't considered before.

"What do I keep telling you about bad girls?" He told her with a playful smirk, though he still took the handcuffs. She smiled with mirth before she answered,

"Bad girls don't get to play. But I haven't been bad, have I? I have just been … _misbehaving_."

"Have you now?"

"Yes. I did," She said, trying to put on her innocent face, but ultimately failing, not that Christian was complaining about the outcome.

"What am I going to do with you?" He asked, slightly shaking his head as he loosened his tie.

"Make me behave." As she said those words, she brought her hands to him.

Christian took them, but disregarded the cuffs on the side for the moment being, just wanting to enjoy a bit of a free Ana before having her tied to his bed. He never really thought of it, but that the opportunity was before him, it seemed like something very appealing and that he should have tried earlier.

She was helping him unbuttoning his shirt, when the doorbell rang, interrupting the two of them. For a micro-second, none of them moved, but then, Christian heaved and started getting up. Ana stopped him, locking her arms behind his nape and kissing his jaw as she told him,

"Ignore it."

Christian pecked her lips as he untied her hands being his neck. "Let me just get rid of it."

"What if it's work again? I swear I'll get myself off if you're not back in five minutes."

"That can be something I would enjoy seeing," He said, though a part of him was afraid that it was something impromptu that would require him to leave her alone once again.

As he took the stairs down, he checked his phone, relieved that no one had tried to call him and that he had no urgent text among the unread messages, and he wondered who could be at the door. The only person who could come at his door so late in the evening was Jose, but Jose had a key to let himself in.

He opened the door and had the surprise of finding Mia. She was twisting her fingers in her hands and looking down the floor before she looked up to Christian as she explained, "Elena said that you were living on the top floor."

"Do you need something?" Christian asked, not sure what Mia could want with him when he had been showing less support and compassion to her than Jose and Mrs Kavanagh.

Mia's eyes really looked at him, lingering on his hair, unbuttoned shirt and shoeless feet before she asked back, "Am I interrupting something?"

It was obvious by her tone that she was very well aware of what she was interrupting, but Christian didn't bounce on that, and rose an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to explain what she was doing at his doorstep.

"Well … I … I wanted to take the time to thank you. Really thank you. For helping me out with everything and not letting me take the blame with that senator guy," She blurted out, looking down her feet and suddenly feeling embarrassed.

Christian furrowed his brows, not sure if he understood where this was leading to. Moreover, he felt that Mia's gratitude was misplaced. He didn't do anything for her, except being maybe a messenger.

"There is nothing to thank me for. I was just being … I was just doing my job."

Mia shook her head, before planting her blue eyes into Christian's. "You were being nice, no matter how you see it. And … I want to thank you for that, and also for not looking at me the way they do. You look at me as if I was just a normal person, and don't sugarcoat things because of … what I used to do. It's a nice feeling."

"You're welcome," He said, short of words. A small peaceful silence grew between them before she brought her arms to herself and swiftly rubbed them as she said,

"Well, now that this has been said, I am going to let you go back to … _your evening_." She wiggled her eyebrows at him, before she made her way to the elevator, a knowing smile on her lips.

Christian closed the door, slightly confused by the genuineness that Mia had just showed him. He briefly wondered how others were looking at her, fr her to feel that she wasn't normal. And better yet, who were those others. But that thought quickly went by the window when he started walking upstairs and found Ana by the stairs.

She was looking at him with her face red with embarrassment. Christian slightly shook his head, and took the few steps separating them. "Were you spying on me?"

"Was she work again?"

"Didn't we had a nice evening plan out?"

"I don't know. Did we?" She countered, and before she could ask anything, Christian took her hand and lead her to the kitchen where he prepared them sundaes for the two of them.

"You bought ice cream?" She exclaimed with surprise, knowing how healthy Christian liked to eat, especially when it came to artificial sugar.

"I did. I know how much you like it. Now … did I ever give you a reason to think that I would go see elsewhere?"

She looked down her bowl, and shook her head. "If we are going to keep on doing this, you're going to have to trust me, Ana. It's not in my nature to betray people I care for."

"I know. I just … She is very pretty, and … well, maybe she is more your type of girl."

Christian bewilderedly stared at the brunette, not sure that he heard properly, before he told her, "I don't have a type Ana. But even if I did, the fact that Mia is pretty would barely be a tangent in the equation. To me, my relationship with you has more to do than just something physical."

For a moment, Ana didn't say a word, her brows furrowed with concentration, before she mumbled into her ice cream, so low that Christian had to strain his ear, "It's not about her … It's just … you don't talk much about us …"

"I know. And I'm sorry. I promise I will work on it. I am just not used to talk about my interactions with people. Even less to other people. Even less to people I care about."

Ana smiled, probably to dissipate the atmosphere between them, and asked as if nothing, "Anyway, what did work want?"

"Her name is Mia. And … I helped her out of a bad situation, she wanted to properly thank me for it."

"Did she bake you a cake?" She asked, eyeing the kitchen counter, half expecting to see there the wanted cake. Christian smiled, shaking slightly his head.

"No. She used something unknown and foreign called putting your gratitude through words."

Ana laughed with him, before taking the untouched sundae bowl in from of Christian and digging into it. Christian watched her eat her ice cream, playing with a curl of her hair, and she surprised him by admitting out of nowhere,

"I was talking to Kate today, and she said that I should tell you this. The thing is … I like being with you, because … well I feel free around you. I feel like I am myself, and this never happened before. With the other guys, I always had to worry that they had some ulterior motive, and I always had to behave a certain way. But with you … I am just me, and you just take it as it is …

And … the thing is … I never know what you feel or think. I only know when we are having sex because it's when we have a connection. But you're so hard to read otherwise, and it makes me think that … I don't know. Shit is going to happen?"

"I'm sorry. Like I said earlier, I promise to work on it," Christian vowed, bothered by the fact that he made her doubt them like that. Then, he took her chin between his fingers and kissed her before he lifted her up on his laps, "In the meantime …"

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**💚Question time:**

**💚What did you think of ****Mia, now?****💚What did you think of ****Elena?**

**💚 What do you think about that little bit of Christian & Ana we had at the end? And the little texts between them?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Thank you so much. Hope you will like the next one just the same._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	17. Chapter 16: Parisian Interlude

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 16: Parisian Interlude ****(2,8K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

It had been four days since Ana had come up to his place for a surprise sleepover, and finally, they were on a plane to Paris. Christian glanced at the brunette sleeping not far from him before he closed his laptop and checked his phone for his schedule.

If he were honest with himself, he had to admit that this Parisian interlude was not coming at a good time for him. They had just bought a company, and all went as planned, but he would have liked better if he had been there to see how the merger was going. There were also those little problems that he left unchecked concerning a couple of dealers who were trying to double-cross Idris. And even though he had asked Ryan to keep an eye on it until he would be back, he didn't like the uncertainty that loomed. The only thing he was not worried about, was Mia who unrolled in University two days before and seemed to like her life as a law student just fine.

But still, he was not going to lie and pretend that he didn't want this little time in Paris that was given to him and that he could share with Ana. He actually liked very much the idea that for a whole week, he would sleep with her in his arms, and get to spend most of his time with her. He actually had a whole plan concerning their first night in Paris, though he did not tell any of it to Ana for he wanted to surprise her.

As soon as they landed and left the airport, Ana was frantic. She pulled a list from her bag, saying that they would barely sleep because there were so many places that she wanted to visit. And all Christian could do, as the cab was driving them to their hotel, was smile at her excitement.

"You do know that you won't get to sleep in the morning if you want to do everything that is in the list," Christian warned her, knowing that Ana was not a morning person. But she surprised him, by confidently affirming,

"I am prepared."

"Good… Though, I have a favour to ask you." She looked at him, waiting for him to go on, and he took her hand in his as he told her, "Can we wait until tomorrow morning before we start crossing down the list?"

"But … it is barely six, and there is so much we can do, tonight. We could go to Montmartre!"

"We could, but I have this little thing I would like to do with you."

She suspiciously looked at him, and Christian only smiled at her, drawing circles on her hand as he told her as if nothing, "Just a little surprise. You'll have to trust me on this one."

"We will go to Montmartre first thing in the morning?"

Christian agreed, though he was a bit curious about Ana's choice as to which Parisian place she wanted to visit first. He would have pecked her as someone wanting to see the Louvres, or Versailles first. But he didn't say anything about it and simply kept her hand in his for the rest of the ride.

When they arrived at their hotel, Ana didn't give him a choice to at least go check his room and pulled him in hers. "I don't want you skipping on me in that room. I have you all to myself for a whole week, I don't want to waste any time with you going to sleep somewhere else."

"Yes, mistress," Christian joked as he followed her in her room. Ana brightly smiled at him, as she said,

"I could get used to that name, you know."

"I'm sure you could. But in the meantime, get dressed, we're going out."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see. It's a surprise."

"It's a dress or jeans surprise?"

Christian thought about it for a second, before kissing her just behind her ear and letting her know, "Whatever you want. But I do admit that I have a preference for dresses when it comes to you."

Ana smiled with mischief and took her vanity and went to the bathroom. Christian shouted through the door that he was going to have a look around, and though he couldn't see her, he was sure that she just rolled her eyes at him.

After closing the door of her room, the same room that was going to be theirs for the next week, Christian went to the room that had been assigned to him just in order to check it. He messed with the bed and towel, just so the cleaning lady wouldn't get suspicious to find an immaculate room and then he went to the lobby, just to see how he would be able to check on the guest list. With a quick look, he figured that he simply needed to come at night and wait for the receptionist to leave on a break so he could see who else was staying at the hotel, just like he did in Tokyo.

When he got back to the room, he undid his bag and picked up his own outfit for the night before he waited for Ana to finish with the shower. As he expected it, steam was coming out of the bathroom when she left it. She smiled at him, wrapped in a towel and dripping with water.

"Casual or classy?"

"If this is your way of trying to know where we are going, you are miserably failing," Christian said, closing the bathroom door behind him.

He took a quick shower, and when he was finished, found Ana in a little black dress applying makeup to her face. Her hair was up in an elegant bun. She stopped what she was doing to ogle over him, making him smirk before he got dressed. They exchanged pleasantries whilst finishing getting ready, and Ana tried once again to apply a face mask on Christian's face.

When the two of them were ready, they left the hotel and took a cab, and after five minutes of complete silence, Ana bursted, "I think I have been good enough, and that you should tell me where we are going."

Christian smirked, perfectly aware that she has been waiting to know ever since he told her that they were going out and that she had been biting her tongue, in the hope that he would talk on his own. He was about to pretend he didn't hear her, when she pouted, giving him no choice than to give in.

"I thought we should use the opportunity to be in Paris to have a real date together."

Ana's face slightly got pinker, before she suddenly rumbled through her bag and retrieved a mirror out of it. "You should have told me that this was a date! I would have done a whole different kind of hair and makeup had I known."

Christian smiled as she was checking herself in the mirror, undoing her bun and letting her hair loose. "Don't worry. Though I do admit that I like it better when you have your hair down," He told her, before kissing her behind her ear.

He was rewarded by a bright smile that could probably lift him up to the sky, though his joy was shortened by her next words. "First date, means that we need to have our first selfie together."

Ana took to her phone and snapped several pictures of them, making fun of Christian who couldn't naturally smile at the camera. Still, she seemed satisfied with what she had, saying that she was going to assign one particular picture to his contact number. Christian didn't reply anything to that, though he thought that it was dangerous to put something personal about them on her phone. Of course, it was more dangerous for her than for him, giving the fact that she was the one who wanted to keep their relationship a secret.

Christian took Ana to a little restaurant in St Michel that was specialised in French food and surrounded with restaurants of all kind of countries, and as they had dinner together, Ana pointed out something that made Christian smile against himself,

"You know, one week eating like the French, and your healthy diet is ruined forever."

"And why that?"

"Come on, Christian! We are in the country of food and wine. French people only swear by butter, cream, sugar and cheese. And I'm not even bringing alcohol in the picture."

Christian chuckled a little, glancing at his ratatouille, before he reminded Ana of something else, "Last time I checked, there weren't that many fat people in France. Actually, I don't think I have seen one fat person since we got here."

"That's because French people are rude and bitter. It eats the calories away."

This made Christian burst in laughter, though Ana didn't seem to think that what she said what that funny, and he reminded her of her words in Japan, "Weren't you the one to say that a country is not its stereotype?"

Ana opened her mouth, before closing it again, at loss of words. They finished eating, and then Christian proposed that they walked alongside the river Seine all the way to the Louvres Museum. As they walked, Ana wondered out loud how come did Christian knew exactly where to go, and he simply smirked at her, telling her that it was all part of the job, keeping for himself that he had been preparing this night ever since he knew that they would be going to Paris.

After looking at the lightened Museum from afar, Christian walked them closer to the Seine, where they took a boat that would make them have a tour of Paris from the water. Ana seemed to like the idea very much, her eyes sparkling with delight as they saw Paris by night.

"It's too bad that we got here in Winter. I'm sure the sight is breathtaking with the sunset as well," She said, leaning against the balustrade with Christian right behind her.

"We could still come back when summer comes." He kissed her neck before she spun on herself and attacked his lips.

As they kissed, a dark thought came to Christian that he should be more careful and not display such affection in public, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Especially when him having such attentions for Ana was making her so happy. And … there was also that part of him that wished to be caught, just so he could stop lurking around when it came to be with Ana.

Before the boat took its stop, Ana took several selfies with Christian, making sure that Paris's most famous landmarks were in the background as it came in the scenery. Finally, the boat stopped near the Eiffel Tower, and the two of them hopped off, ready to pay a visit to the Iron Lady.

But as they were making their way to the most famous places in Paris, Ana stopped at a street vendor, and bought a snowglobe that she gave to Christian, "For your children."

Christian rose an eyebrow, not following her trail of thoughts, and she explained as they resumed their walk, "It's a tradition. My father has the same one with me. Every country that he visited, he always brought a pin for me and a shirt for … Well, I thought that you could do the same for your children since you like taking steps ahead when it comes to them."

Christian didn't say anything, though the idea that Ana was presenting to him was appealing in more than one way. "Don't you dare try to make fun of me! You're the one who already has blankies and toys when you don't even have the mother to your children," She warned, making Christian laugh as they took the elevator up.

They stopped on the second floor, and he glanced at her. "Maybe I should have told you not to wear heels."

"Why? I like wearing heels. It helps me not feel like a munchkin next to you."

"If you want to get on top, we have stairs to take."

"Oh, that. You have no idea of what I can endure before my heels start hurting. I could do a marathon in stilettos."

"I'll hold you to that," He joked.

They started their ascension to the top of the Tower, and once there, Christian was rewarded once again by Ana bright smile on her face. For a moment the two of them were silent, appreciating the view in front of them.

"You know, I think this is the best date I have ever had," She said and Christian simply smiled to her.

Since he never dated anyone before, he couldn't say the same, this date was bound to be the best date he ever had. But he genuinely enjoyed it. Though, he generally enjoyed spending time with Ana.

He leaned down to kiss her, but when she kissed him back, Christian sensed that there was something off. He dismissed the thought, thinking that he was starting to be paranoid, and they took a cab back to their hotel. As soon as they were alone in their room, Christian took Ana's face between his hands and kissed her, bringing his body to hers.

They shared a passionate kiss as he slowly led them to bed, but when he was about to lay Ana down, she interrupted him and put space between the two of them.

"Weren't you the one who complained that I never initiate anything?" Christian asked with an eyebrow up, not sure of what had taken over her, and she properly sat on the bed, looking down her hands as she elusively said,

"This is a very bad timing. We should have come to Paris last week, as I had planned to."

For a moment, Christian didn't understand what she meant, sitting on the bed next to her and wondering what difference a week could make, and so she explained, "I'm on my periods."

He nodded, though he was surprised that he didn't figure that out on his own. Ana got up, and started walking to the bathroom as she said, "If you want to sleep in the other room, I'd understand."

"Why would I do that?"

"I don't know. Many guys are usually grossed out by the whole concept."

Christian didn't have time to retort anything that she closed the door. So he undressed and got ready to go to bed, checking his phone whilst waiting for her to exit the bathroom. He disregarded the few unimportant emails he received and kept the most important to read them in the morning.

When Ana came back into the room, she seemed surprised to see him, and she slipped in bed next to him, before snuggling against his chest and asking him, "So, you're not going to be awkward around me for me having my you-know-what?"

Christian chuckled, a part of him surprised that Ana appeared to be so prude around this particular topic when she was the cruder one out of the two of them; and a sudden flash came to him of their last week in Japan. Back then, they didn't have sex when in Okinawa, and Ana had been a bit less touchy than usual.

"Is that why you were distant when we were in Okinawa?" He asked back, and she nodded. Christian took her in his arms and delicately kissed her neck, "I don't see why I should mind you having your periods. I actually enjoy quite a lot you being a woman, if you want my honest opinion."

As he expected it, Ana wiggled her eyebrows at him, taking his last sentence in the naughtiest way possible, and he switched off the light, taking Ana in his arms. They positioned themselves to go to sleep, but Ana turned to face Christian, and told him,

"We're still going to Montmartre tomorrow. Don't let me sleep in."

"I won't," He told her, looking at her face bathed by the moonlight.

She smiled at him, and as she did so, Christian felt something warm invade his heart. He leaned to kiss her, giving her back her smile afterwards, the warmth in his heart growing bigger and bigger as he watched her fall asleep.

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**No ****cliffies, and is it the beginning of love? Maybe, maybe not ...**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of that Parisian interlude****? **

**💚What did you think of Christian's date****?**

**💚 What do you think about that Christian and Ana that we had?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_I can't wait for you to see what will happen between Ana and Mia ... You'll see ..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	18. Chapter 17: Flashes From The Past

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 17: Flashes From The Past ****(4,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**You need to pay extra attention to the flashbacks. There are some characters introduced here that are … well of some importance to the development of other characters we know. Pay attention to the little details, like the tenses used for them, or the way they act and talk. I mean, I cannot make this even more obvious ….**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV (5 years old)**

_"Hurry up, Mommy! We're going to be late," Christian cried out from the kitchen, engulfing his breakfast with speed. _

_It was his first day at school, and he had been bouncing all over the place ever since his parents woke him up. He was so excited to finally go to school and get to make himself some friends. During the whole past week, it was all he talked about to his parents and Mary, his nanny, though his parents hadn't been that much around as school day approached. _

_Christian's father smiled at him, before straightening his son's uniform and cleaning his mouth. "Stop stressing your mother and go brush your teeth. We still have time don't worry."_

_"But what about my lunch pack? And did you make the extra cookies that I get to share with my new friends? And what if the teacher wants to speak with you? Oh, and what if —"_

_"Go brush your teeth," His father ordered._

_Christian rushed to the bathroom and put toothpaste on his toothbrush. Then, he put it on his mouth and brushed twice before spitting everything out and rushing back to the kitchen where both of his parents were. His father glanced at him with that look that Christian didn't like, because it meant he was in trouble._

_"I didn't say go pretend. Go wash your teeth, young men. Up and down, or the cavity-witch will pay you a visit tonight."_

_Christian pouted, but still went back to the bathroom to properly brush his teeth. His nanny had once taken him to the cavity-witch den, and he heard grown-ups scream bloody murder before even opening the door. That witch had wizard dressed in white torture you, and Christian was not going to have any of it. _

_Once his teeth were cleaned, and his uniform tucked in all the right places, he ran to the front door and called out his parents to hurry up once more. He didn't want to be late for his first day at school. But the only problem was, his parents didn't seem to have any issue getting him late for his very first day at school. They were talking amongst themselves about who knew what, whilst Christian was bouncing back and forth from the car to the house. _

_"We're going to be _**_late_**_!" He cried out for the umpteenth time, pulling at his mother's arm, but suddenly stopped when he saw sadness on her face. _

_"Grace," Christian's father said with a warning look, and quickly the look was gone, replaced by the smile she always gave Christian when she was proud of him._

_"You are going to behave, today. You have to be nice to everyone. Don't talk too much, and don't ask too many questions to your teacher," She told her son while she was buckling his belt in the back of the car. _

_Christian waited for his mother to sit next to his father who was driving them to school, and then, he brightly explained to his mother his master plan, "I am going to be so nice today, that everyone will want to be my friend. I'll even share all my cookies, even with the teacher. And when everyone is my friend, we will get to have an awesome party for my birthday. With balloons, and cookies, but not clowns, because Mary says that clowns can be scary to some people. And no animals, because Mary said that animals weren't created for our entertainment."_

_Christian saw his father smile to him in the rearview mirror, as he reminded him of something important, "Your birthday is not before next September."_

_"I know. But I have to start getting friends _**_now_**_. Mary says that friendship takes time. So if I want friends at my next birthday party, I have to start making them now."_

_His father chuckled a little, and the rest of the trip was filled with Christian telling his parents all about how excited he was to go to school and meet people. Though he was five, Christian didn't spend much time with other children. His parents didn't have any other children, and Mary wasn't fond of going to he park and other places where Christian could have mingled with other kids his age. So this first day at school for him was the first of many things. _

_When his father parked the car, Christian's mother had to remind her son not to unbuckle until the car's engine was no longer running and Christian told his father once more to hurry up. They got out of the car, and Grace crouched to fix Christian's uniform, her eyes teary. _

_"Don't worry, Mommy. I am not going to war," Christian said with a proud smile. He had once heard his father say that to her, and it had made her laugh despite her tears at the time. And it seemed to have the same effect on her this day as well, for she chocked on a laugh and hugged her son tight against her chest. _

_"I love you, Christian…" She said, kissing her son on the cheek and he brightly smiled at her, before looking at his father, expectantly. The grown man smiled, and Christian could swear that his father was about to cry. Still, he finished his wife's sentence,_

_"To the moon and back."_

_Christian brightly smiled, happy beyond words, and put his bag on his back, his lunch pack in his hands. He started walking to school. He was about to finally walk into school when he turned and rushed back to his parents to give them a hug. He kissed his mother, and told her, "I love you."_

_A scream echoed through the air, startling_ Christian out of his sleep. For a moment he was disoriented as to what happened, but then Ana screamed again, making him realise that it was she who woke him up. He shook her up, hoping to wake her up. She snapped her eyes open, looking alarmed and terrorised, and Christian caressed her face with delicateness easing her breathing back to a normal rate.

"Nightmare?" He asked when her heart wasn't beating like a drum anymore.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."

"You want to talk about it?" He proposed, but he could see that she was already falling asleep, though she took the time to mumble,

"No, it's okay."

He watched her go back to sleep, though his mind wandered to that time when she had a nightmare like that in Okinawa. She had called it a night terror and told Christian that it had been triggered by the rain. But though it had been cold and windy ever since they arrived in Paris, they did not have a single drop of rain. In fact, Ana had slept at Christian's a couple of times during rainy nights, and she didn't wake up screaming bloody murder.

He wondered if he could talk to someone about this, but the question was who. Ana clearly didn't seem eager to breach the topic back in Okinawa, and Christian couldn't decently ask Raymond why his daughter had night terrors. Well, he could, but that would arise certain questions from his boss that Christian wasn't allowed to honestly answer to. There was still Jose, but Christian doubted that he knew Ana that well. Still, this was a conversation Christian would have with his friend, no matter how much Jose didn't want to get too involved in his relationship with the brunette.

After taking this decision, his brain drifted toward another problem, one that he would have gladly forgotten about. _His dream_. It had been years since he had any flashbacks from his childhood, especially his childhood with his parents, and he had always figured out that it was because he had learnt to put his past to the past. He rarely thought of his time in foster houses, and even less of his time with his parents.

But this dream reminded him of something that he had so easily and gladly put to six feet underground. He had a normal family before it all went down to hell. His parents appeared to have loved him, just like Ana told him. And he for sure had loved his parents, before they threw his love back in his face and abandoned him like an old sock.

This first day at school had been tainted with the memory of waiting for hours for his parents to come pick him up, and never doing so. He had forgotten how excited he had been to actually be part of the society. Up until that dream, all Christian had remembered of this day was the betrayal to have a social worker come and tell him that he was now all alone in this world.

A few years after he had started working for him, Raymond had proposed Christian to look for his parents, but Christian had refused. It wasn't a stone that he had wished to turn, and to that day, that did not change. His parents had left him, and this wasn't something that he could forgive. It wasn't something that anyone could forgive.

Still, Christian had no idea why suddenly, he started dreaming about his last day with his parents. And what bothered him the most wasn't the reminiscence in itself, but the fact that he was so worked up about it. As if he was the patient and the shrink all at once, at the exception that he didn't have the answer as to what triggered that memory and why that particular memory.

With a little sigh, he got up, sure that he would never be able to go back to sleep, and after glancing at the clock and seeing that it was barely five in the morning, he decided that he would have a little run to clear his mind from this unpleasant dream he just had.

He went out in the cold and quiet Paris, realising as he did so that being with Ana was making him take liberties that he would have never taken otherwise. If he had been just her bodyguard, he never would have risked coming out of the hotel without her, even knowing that she wouldn't be awake for several other hours. But being with her, he knew that she wouldn't do that to him.

Since the hotel wasn't far from The Eiffel Tower, and therefore the River Seine, Christian ran alongside the water, sure that like that he wouldn't get lost. He didn't run for long, going back on his track as soon as he passed the Louvre Museum; and as he was on his way back, it occurred to Christian that Paris was a really small city, especially compared to New York.

Once he was back, Christian took a quick cold shower and went over his laptop and phone to work a little, sending a few emails, and taking advantage of the time difference to call Ryan and check how things were doing with a few deals the two of them had concerning a few dealers. He emailed Eamon concerning their latest business acquisition, which reminded him that he ought to do something about Hyde. He also emailed Mia who was nervous about her first week in college, but also very informative concerning Elena and the life choices that lead her to help girls like Mia nowadays.

When eight in the morning struck, Christian shut down his laptop and went to wake up Ana, who, as he expected, was not in the bestest mood. She tossed around in the bed, mumbling something about not being some bird who wakes up at incongruous hours, and Christian leaned just so he could whisper in her ear, "I thought you wanted to have breakfast at Montmartre. If you want to sleep in, we can reschedule that whole Sacré-Coeur business."

This had the merit to wake her straight up. It was as if she rose from the dead, though instead of looking for blood or brains, she went straight to the shower. Christian waited for her to get ready, which surprisingly didn't take as much as time she had used him to in Japan, and a part of his mind wondered if Ana was going to drag him out to church.

He knew that, though they never abruptly brought up the topic, Ana was religious and a firm believer in a higher power. He, on the other hand, believed in himself and what he could make out of life. He never had any help from a higher form, and never needed one for the matter.

Once ready, they took a cab to Montmartre and had breakfast there in a little café, though Christian regretted just like Ana had done the night before that it wasn't summer, so they could enjoy the terrace. As he was enjoying his tea, and her, her hot chocolate, he noticed that she was looking all over the place. He could have taken it as the excitement of being there, but she looked more as if she was expecting someone, which Christian didn't hesitate to ask,

"Are you expecting someone?"

"… More like hoping to bump into someone," She mindlessly said, gyring her head in direction of the door.

Christian rose an eyebrow, but did not ask more about it. He didn't want to push her into sharing something she wasn't ready (or willing) to share. For ten more minutes, the two of them stayed silent, eating their breakfast with Ana looking up to the door every time someone opened it. And finally, it seemed like she decided to explain to Christian what it was all about,

"Did you know that I have a brother? Well, half-brother as they say"

"Mike," Christian simply said, making Ana put back her hot chocolate, her blue eyes wide open with surprise.

"Dad told you about him!?"

Christian shook his head, though the thought had crossed his mind several times as to why Raymond never talked about his first child. "You did."

"_I did_?"

"Yes. You often mention him without even realising it. Sometimes you do, like yesterday when you mentioned that your father bought T-shirts all over the world, and stopped just before telling me for whom. But sometimes, you just let it slip by."

Ana looked impressed before her mocking smile spread on her lips, and she told Christian, "Who would have known that I would get stuck with the one guy who pays attention when the girl talks. If you weren't so good in bed, I would say that you are gay."

Christian shook his head with a small smile, sipping on his tea and waiting for Ana to go on about her brother and what it had to do with her need to be in Montmartre. She kept her eyes down, as if she was mesmerised by her orange juice, and told her,

"The thing you need to know is … well, I haven't seen or heard about Mike in ten years.

**Ana's PoV (10 years old)**

_Ana woke up with her head heavy like she did every morning for the past five years, and the more time passed, the less she liked it. Her Aunt Elena had told her that she should try drinking some infusion before going to sleep, but that didn't change anything, except if she counted her bladder being fuller when she got to bed._

_After fighting for five long minutes with herself, she finally got out of bed and opened her curtains, a bright smile on her face. It was Saturday, which meant that her father would be here to spend the day with her, shopping for a present for her brother. The birthday was in two weeks, and she still had no idea what to get him, but their Dad always came up with the best ideas, so she wasn't that worried. _

_Of course, Mike had been dropping several hints concerning what he wanted, but like every year, Ana wanted to surprise him. Plus, she doubted that their father would allow Mike to ask **Veronica Mars** from the show to come be his playdate for his birthday. First it was gross, second, Veronica belonged with Logan. _

_She hopped her way to the living room, where she surprisingly saw no one but her Uncle Eric, though that didn't stop her from jumping into his arms, delighted to see him as always. _

_"Uncle Eric! What are you doing here?"_

_"Do I need an excuse to see my favourite Goddaughter?"_

_"I'm your only Goddaughter," She responded with a blasé tone, because he would always make that joke. Not that she minded deep down. She loved spending time with Eric, because he was a breath of fresh air. He always had a joke ready, he was always down to play with her when she was younger, and most importantly, he never hesitated on talking about her mother, even more after the image of Carla starting fading away in her memory._

_Ana sat next to the older man, and grabbed a croissant as she asked him, "Did Mike already went out? Daddy is not going to like it. He said that we should wait for Mark if we want to get out."_

_"Ana …" Eric started with a contrite voice, but the young girl wasn't paying attention. _

_"What do you think we should get Mike for his birthday. When I talked to Daddy about it last week, he said something about a car, but … what it is the point of giving Mike a car, if he's never going to drive it? I was thinking that maybe we could all go to Paris, since Mike loves the place so much. I mean, it could even be just a family trip just the three of us, no Marks, or Samuels or Jerrys to ruin the thing. Just a few days. And I know, I don't speak French, but Mike does. He could go to Montmartre, and climb those steps he talks so much about. What do you think?"_

_She was brightly smiling, so proud of her idea, and persuaded that it was the best she ever had; but her smile quickly faded away when she saw the look of her Godfather's face. _

_"I have some bad news for you, Pumpkin," He told her, using that little nickname that usually put a smile of her face. But Ana immediately saw that his heart wasn't in it. _

_She got up from her chair, and imperially asked, "Where are Daddy and Mike?"_

_"Your father charged me to tell you that he is sorry, but he won't be able to make it today. He has important business to attend to."_

_Ana took a step farther from Eric and asked one again, "Where is Mike?"_

_"I am so sorry to be the one to tell you, Ana." He looked at her with such compassion that tears came to her eyes as fear clutched her heart. "Mike runaway yesterday night. Your father is out looking for him as we speak."_

_"_**_No_**_!" She screamed, running to her room as tears ran free down her face. _

_Mike never would have run away. He loved her, he loved his family, he had no reason to run away. He was happy. _**_They_**_ were happy. Not even yesterday night, he came to her room to reassure her as thunderstruck frightened her to no end. He was the one who put her to sleep, the one who brought her hot milk and a cookie. Mike would never runaway, because he would never leave her._

_But there was also that one time when she caught Mike and their father arguing, and though none of them ever mentioned it to her, she knew it had been about her. She was actually afraid to know what it was about. She was afraid that, no matter how much she didn't want it to be true, her father loved her more than he loved Mike. And now she was afraid that this was the reason why he ran away._

"I wanted to come here, because … well, if there is anywhere I am going to find Mike, it's in Montmartre."

**Christian's PoV (present time)**

For a moment, Christian did not say a word, processing all the information Ana had just given him. But he knew he wasn't going to think about it at the moment. He would linger on the matter at a later time, and focus on the present moment. He looked for words to tell Ana, but all that came to his mind was,

"That's not how you look for someone."

She seemed a bit taken aback as if her solution was the best one since the beginning, but then she looked deep into Christian's grey eyes and told him, "Well … maybe you could find him for me. You could help me look for my brother."

This had the merit to make Christian speechless for a few moments. It wasn't much that he didn't want to help Ana reunite with a long lost family member, but more that he felt there were holes in that story, that he knew Ana couldn't see, or understand.

For starters, Christian had problems believing that the loving father and powerful man that was Raymond never managed to find his runaway kid, after a decade. This alone wasn't making any sense. Raymond could find any man on the planet, but his son? Second, he had some difficulties with the reason Mike ran away for. Sure Raymond never talked about his son to Christian, but Christian saw how he acted around his Godchildren, and he highly doubted that Raymond would love one of his children more than the other, no matter who their mother was.

And still, he nodded because he didn't feel like refusing to her something that seemed so simple, though he gave himself some insurance, "I won't do it overnight, Ana. I'll look for your brother, but I'm not doing it whilst we're in Paris, and I'm not reconnecting you with him. You'll do that on your own."

She frantically nodded, before jumping out of her chair and onto his laps to passionately kiss him. And though he appreciated the gesture, he simply pecked her back, telling her, "I don't think it is good idea for us to be so openly intimate, if you want to keep your father in the dark. Raymond has eyes everywhere."

"Oops, sorry."

Though she seemed anything but sorry. Christian shook his head, loving this side of Ana, and loving even more that so few (or even no one) knew about it, and they went on their merry way to be tourists. As he expected it, Ana made them visit Sacré-Cœur, before she asked if they could go to the Louvre. Despite of the sun, it was a cold day outside, but Ana still insisted that they walked and took the subway (though she quickly disenchanted about her romanticised idea of the Parisian subway).

All day long, they visited the Louvre Museum, Ana insisting that they took pictures near the most famous pieces of thoroughly did the Egyptian aisle, as well as the roman-baroque one, lingering from aisle to aisle after they were done with those two.

Once done with the Museum, Ana proposed that they went to a restaurant. Over dinner, she expressed something that Christian found odd,

"I never thought that Paris was such a poor city?"

"Have we been to the same Paris?"

"Yes. I have never seen so many homeless in my whole life," She explained, bemused, though Christian could see that this revelation was making her sad. And still, he couldn't help the small laugh that came out of him, earning a glare from the girl in front of him.

"Paris isn't poor, Ana. It's just you who are naive. There are tons of homeless in New York."

"I am not naive!" She exclaimed with vigour. "I am always out in New York and I've barely seen homeless there."

"When is the last time you took the subway in New York? Or just went for a stroll there? And I am sorry to tell you that neither your neighbourhood or mine are places where you are likely to find a homeless."

This made her think a little, though whatever passed through her head never came out through her mouth. Christian let her reflect on that, and as dessert was served to her, Ana started another topic, putting that homeless business behind them.

"Uncle Eric was right. French people make the best flambé deserts."

Christian smiled, watching her eat her flambé pear with as much delectation as she did the night before with her flambé banana. He figured this ought to be as good of a moment as any other to ask her,

"Were you close to Lincoln?"

"Didn't the 'Uncle' give it away? He was … so good to us. Mike, Ethan, Kate and Jake. Jake didn't get to know him much. Uncle Eric helped me after Mom, and after Mike … and," She stopped herself, before looking up to Christian and swallowing with difficulty. "Did you kill him?"

"I did," He admitted, his face impassible though he didn't like how the atmosphere suddenly thickened between them. He watched her look down her desert, before she looked up and asked with sadness,

"Why?"

Christian held her gaze, not sure if he should cross the line that Raymond never crossed with his daughter. He knew that his boss never really came straightforward to his daughter concerning his side activities. Christian wasn't fool enough to say that Ana wasn't suspecting something, but he didn't think this was something that she should hear from him.

"You don't want to know," He told her, doing his best to avoid lying to her. He knew that it would pain her to know that this man she loved and cherished so much had betrayed her father.

Ana looked down on her desert once again, before putting her small fork down and asking, "Can we go?"

Christian paid the check, in cash, and asked the restaurant to call a cab for them. He was at a loss on what to do with Ana, especially when she was clearly putting distance between them. Once in front of their hotel room, she turned and asked, her eyes cast downward,

"Would you mind staying in your room tonight?"

"Ana …" He pleaded, taking a step closer to her. She stiffened.

"I just want … to be alone tonight."

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

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**~ Okay ... so a little cliffy, but two updates in a row ... If anyone guesses why Christian had that particular dream and what it means, let me know.**

**Also, congratulations to the very rare few who caught on about Raymond mentioning a first wife giving birth, but nothing about that said child ... Now we know a bit more, ...**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of those little flashbacks****? Just know that some more are on their way...**

**💚Do you think that Christian will find ****Mike?**

**💚 What do you think of the end? Do you understand Ana's feelings?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

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‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Sofia: **_I am not sure you will keep on saying that a few chapters in ... I mean, everything has been nice and sweet so far ..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	19. Chapter 18: The Truth of Paris

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 18: The Truth of Paris ****(3,8K)**

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**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

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**Christian's PoV**

As he laid awake in his bed, his hands behind his head, it occurred to Christian that it was the first of his life that he was losing sleep over a kill. Never before he had questioned his actions concerning putting someone six feet under. But this night, as he laid alone in his bed, he started asking himself if he had made the right decision. And what actually bothered him wasn't that he was questioning the reasoning that led to the killing, but more the fact that maybe he should have kept that particular part of Ana's life to himself.

He highly doubted that Raymond would have asked him to kill his best friend if he wasn't sure of Christian's judgement, and Christian knew perfectly well that if he hadn't ratted on Eric, Raymond wouldn't be where he was. There was actually a high possibility that he would be in prison, and Ana would have had a whole different life as a teenager.

The hours kept on passing, though when Christian glanced at the time he saw that it was only three. He was feeling so weird to feel guilty about something he did so long ago, and he knew he was justified to do. He kept on thinking about it until he realised that what he was feeling about was that he took a good man out of Ana's life. When she spoke about the man, there was so much love and nostalgia in her voice, and it was obvious that she missed her Godfather. He didn't regret killing the crook that he knew Eric was, but he wished Ana didn't have to be the one who had to mourn someone in the end.

With a heave, he tossed around in his bed, before he bluntly sat up and called Jose. His friend picked up at the second ring, worry dripping in his voice,

"Christian, are you okey? Is something wrong?"

"No. Everything is fine. Why wouldn't it be?"

"You're calling me whilst on a trip. Even more, a trip with Ana," Jose pointed out, and Christian had to admit that when he was travelling, whether alone, with Raymond, or with Ana, he never made personal calls. He could understand why Jose would think that the worst had happened.

"Ana and I had a discussion … About Eric…" Christian said. He never upfront told Jose that he was the one who had killed Eric, but this was because Jose never really asked him directly either. Still, Christian knew that his best friend wasn't stupid and had high doubts concerning his implication over Eric's murder.

"I never thought that she would have the guts to ask you."

"Who told her in the first place?" Christian snapped, because this was something that had been bothering him since she first mentioned it in Japan. How did Ana even hear that he could be related to the murder of her beloved Godfather?

"She's not stupid, Christian. She hears people talking around, and gossiping. And people have been gossiping about you and Eric for quite a while."

At this, Christian remained silent, not sure if he liked what he was hearing. He knew that people suspected that he had something to do with Eric's death, but he never thought that people would be actually talking about it so much that it would echo back all the way to Ana's ears.

"Did you tell her?" Jose asked, refocusing the conversation on its primary topic.

"Of course, I did!"

"Didn't you ever consider that a white lie could be good once in a while? I mean, I know where you stand on honesty and all, but … Eric meant a lot to Ana. He was there for her when her father couldn't, he was … nothing like the man we worked with. He was a whole different person in his personal life, and he considered the Steele and Kavanagh children like his own. When Ana had some bad news for her father, she passed by Eric first, just like when she needed a favour from him. And now … you told her that you're the reason she no longer has a Godfather."

Christian rubbed his face with frustration, when he petulantly told his friend, "She already knew. She just asked for confirmation."

"And you don't think that a part of her was hoping for you to prove her wrong? What if I killed Raymond, and you never knew about it, only hearing rumours. Wouldn't you like me to white lie when you'd confront me about it?"

Christian thought of this possibility for a moment, trying to see if he would like the lie or the truth better. But if he was honest with himself, he didn't know which one was the worst.

With a sigh, he got up and started pacing in his room, glaring at the bed every time it came in his vision, revealing itself to be void of Ana. "I didn't tell her why. She asked me if I did it, and I told her, yes, but when she asked why, I … I don't know. I couldn't tell her that her "_Uncle Eric_" was trying to put her father in jail, betraying her by the same occasion."

"Don't tell her. Ana is a forgiving person. She'll come around, don't worry. But don't take away from her the fond memories she has of the man," Jose advised, reassuring Christian that his instincts on how he handled the situation weren't all wrong. "Actually, what did you tell her?"

"That she didn't want to know why."

"And she didn't question you?"

"Of course she didn't. She's not stupid, as you said. She knows that if she starts questioning, we'll end up talking about her father's side activities," Christian retorted.

A part of him was sure that Ana had her suspicions on what her father (and by extension him) was doing, and how he managed to make himself so rich and powerful, despite the fact that he wasn't that involved in Clark Inc'. He suspected that Ana liked it better when she didn't know so much about her father and his ways of life, and when she could pretend that life was a perfect little rainbow. And he understood why Raymond didn't want to break that image to his daughter. He knew that if Ana didn't ask, Raymond wasn't going to lay it out for her, and he made the same decision concerning the brunette.

"Maybe you should use the occasion to end things with her?" Jose proposed, making Christian suddenly stopped pacing, dead in his tracks and staring at his reflection in the window. "I mean … Christian, we both know this isn't going to go nowhere, and it's better if you quit now."

For a moment, Christian remained silent, seeing Jose's point-of-view. Ultimately, Christian wanted a family, with kids and a loving wife; and he doubted that Ana would ever see him as someone other than a person to enjoy herself with. He actually doubted that she would ever tell her father about their little adventure together, even years after they would be over. She and he had very different future lined in front of them, futures that would never cross, and never should have crossed. But …

"I don't want to quit, now, Jose. I want to keep this going as long as I can. I _like_ being with her."

"You shouldn't."

"I know, but I still do." It was a lame thing to say, but it was still how he felt. He liked being with Ana. He liked when she smiled at him, when she seduced him when she leaned on him for comfort. And that's when it struck him. This was the thing that was bothering him. She was in pain, and she shooed him away, instead of asking for him to comfort her. Because he was the reason behind her pain.

"I'm sorry to have called you like that, Jose. I better try to get some sleep," Christian said, and after his friend hung up, he went for a run to once again, clear his mind.

This run lasted longer than the previous one, but he still came back before the sun rose, and had a cold shower, before going to the lobby to wait for Ana, working from his phone on the few things that he still needed to deal with. Ryan had texted him about some deals he could put his hands on whilst he was still in Europe, but Christian pushed back his decision to when he would call Raymond to let him know about it.

Around ten, Ana finally came down, looking a bit lost until her eyes fell on him. She walked straight to him, and once he was at arm's length, she slapped his torso as she pouted, "You weren't in your room."

"I figured I would wait for you down here."

"I thought you had left me all alone!"

Christian gently smiled at her, walking her out of the hotel as he reasoned her, "Why would I do that? First of all, you're the one who wanted space, not me. I was very happy with sleeping with you by my side. Second, your father would have my head on a spike if I left you to fend for yourself in a foreign country. Even more, a country where you don't speak the language."

The frown on her face still did not disappear, and Christian noticed that, unlike the day before, she did not try to get closer to him. He did not comment on it, taking them to a café not far from their hotel and ordering a breakfast for the two them; and once they were alone, waiting for their food, he addressed the elephant in the room,

"I don't want what I told you yesterday night to come between us, Ana."

Her blue eyes looked up, blinking several times as she was looking for her words, before she asked, "Are you even sorry for what you did?"

"No," He coldly said, before thinking back of all those times Ana had told him that he never really addressed to her how he felt, and how difficult it was for her to read him. "But, I am sorry for the pain it causes you."

"You know, he was a very good man, Christian."

He furrowed his brows, not wanting Ana to feel so bad for someone who didn't deserve her pity. "He was a good person to you, and that's how you should remember him. But … you shouldn't let what happened to him —"

"Come between us? It won't happen. Or I never would have started this relationship with you, Christian. I have had my doubts for some times, you just cleared it up for me."

It wasn't what Christian had in mind when he started his sentence, but he would still take it. "I just want us to be in an honest relationship, Ana. I know the truth hurts, but I want you to know that you can trust me to always be honest with you."

She looked deep into his eyes, before smiling, her hand coming forward to take his. "I think this is the nicest thing a guy ever said to me. And I hope that you too will learn to trust me."

He smiled back to her, squeezing her hand with gentleness; and they ate their breakfast. Once they were full, Christian followed the little brunette throughout Paris, from shop to shop as she Christmas shopped. She bought gifts for each of the Kavanagh, telling Christian each time why this particular present would be perfect for that particular Kavanagh, and as they were picking a present for Alexander in a barbershop, Ana asked Christian what he wanted for Christmas.

"I'm not really a Christmas guy," He told her, which made her shake her head with bemusement.

"Come on, Christian. _Everyone_ loves Christmas. And as far as I know, you're neither a Scrooge or a Grinch."

"I … I guess I am a Grinch," He eluded as they walked out of the shop, with him heavier of one more bag.

They strolled around, Ana stopping every time she saw a liquor store, but apparently not satisfied with what she was seeing in the vitrine. "Are you telling me that you never celebrated Christmas?"

"I did. I just don't anymore. My last Christmas was … not something I'd like to repeat."

Ana stopped so she could look at Christian in the eyes, waiting for him to explain what he had meant. But he gave her a quick smile and started walking again, forcing her to do the same.

"You were the one talking about trust," She reminded him with a small voice. Christian sighed, and told her,

"My last Christmas was when I was eight. I had just come into a new foster home, and it seemed to be a good one. We were five kids there. Three boys and two girls. All adopted I was the youngest, with one of the girls. The eldest was a girl named Tia, she was fifteen. It was the first time I had toys in a foster house. Toys of my own. We were all getting along, kids and parents.

Christmas Eve, we all sang our carols and put some milk and cookies for Santa. Christmas morning we woke up to the police arresting Mrs Weber, the mother. She had caught her husband trying to rape Tia, and she killed him on the spot. She was sentenced to capital punishment for protecting a kid."

A small silence grew between them as they kept on walking through the streets of Paris when Ana finally put her hands on his bicep and asked, "Did you see him in the morning?"

"Who?"

"The man who …"

Though he fought against it, Christian couldn't help a small smile to grow on his lips as Ana couldn't even say the words out loud. He kissed her hair, despite the fact that he had been the one that they should keep their physical interaction to the minimum outside of their hotel room, and he told her, "Don't go putting dark images in your head. It was a long time ago, and it just killed that whole Christmas spirit for me. It's life."

"Okay," she said with a small voice. They took a turn, and Christian tried to lighten up a bit the mood for her,

"What do _you_ want for Christmas?"

"A Christmas miracle," She told him with a knowing smile, before standing on her tiptoes and kissing his jaw, letting him know, "But since you're not a Christmas kind of guy, I won't ask anything from you. It would be like asking a Jew or a Muslim a Christmas present. It doesn't feel right."

Christian didn't have anything to say to that, but a part of him still thought that he ought to try to find her a decent present. Though the problem was, what do you give to a girl who already has everything, and who can't flaunt your present to the world?

They kept on shopping for the rest of the day, Ana dragging them from liquor store to liquor store until she finally found what she was looking for in a small shop in the 11th arrondissement. As she was looking at different sort of liquors, she explained to Christian,

"Dad has this giant cellar in the basement, with liquors from all over the world."

"I know."

"He took you there?" She asked, her eyes wide with surprise. Christian nodded before he explained,

"He tried to explain to me the importance of each liquor, but I think this is one of the rare times I didn't pay attention to what your father was saying."

Ana smiled, turning back her head to the shelves as she told Christian, "Dad loves his good liquor. I brought him a good saké from Japan, but he already had a few. And I know he doesn't have any Grand Marnier. I just hope the packaging is pretty."

Christian nodded, looking around in the hope to find the alcohol she just mentioned. The salesman came to their rescue and presented them with a bottle that Christian qualified as average. He started selling all the good qualities of his bottle, looking strictly at Christian who couldn't help but smirk at the guy when Ana interrupted him and told him that they were interested in something more refined than 'the usual stuff'. She was very specific in what she was looking for, and he disappeared in the back of the store to look for it.

Ana smiled to Christian, looking at the wines now. "Good thing he could speak English. I would be toast otherwise."

"I would have happily translated for you."

"I know. But I wouldn't have been able to shut him up the same," She grinned with pride.

Christian shared her glee whilst Ana was thoroughly examining the wine bottles, talking to Christian as if she was talking to herself, "You know, Dad has several whiskeys in tiny oak barrels in his cellar. They are so cute. He has one that he bought the year I was born. The whiskey is the same age as me. How cool is that?"

Christian wasn't sure what he should say, not really seeing the coolness in any of those actions. Which Ana seemed to have picked on, because she looked over her shoulder to him, a smile on her face as she rolled her eyes, "I keep forgetting that you're an old guy who doesn't drink. It is pretty cool. Especially since people usually do it with wine, because wine is the best and easiest alcohol to age yourself. But Dad being Dad … He went extra for us. There is one for Mike too. And Kate, Ethan and Jake."

The salesman came back at this moment, with a bottle that looked nothing like the first one (except for the primary form), and they left the shop with Ana happy for her purchase. As they walked further into the centre of Paris, she started wondering out loud if she shouldn't find a lame Christmas present and keep this one for her father's sixtieth birthday that was coming in a couple of years; but she decided against it, knowing herself too well, and that she wouldn't be able to wait that long for him to open his present.

Between Bastille and République, she made them stop in a small shop that sold handmade jewelries, explaining to Christian that Kate's birthday was two days after Christmas and that she should buy her present in Paris whilst she was at it. Christian let her roam through the shop (though the shop wasn't big enough to actually roam through it), and he watched her settle for a pair of emeralds earrings.

"They will go lovely with her eyes ..."

As the salesgirl wrapped it up, she played with the pendants of a few necklaces that were by the counter, keeping one in her hand. She looked at it all the while the salesgirl was packing the earrings, and let it go when they were ready to go, surprising Christian.

When they were outside, he actually questioned her about it, "I thought you would buy that necklace."

She shrugged, smiling to him before she completely changed the topic, "I'm starving. Let's go in a restaurant that serves onion soup."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

It had been a week since they came to Paris, and now that it was their final moments in this city, Christian wasn't sure if he liked going on vacations with Ana. Sure he liked going to bed with her and spending the whole day with her, but in the end, he would have to part with her, and this was the part he liked less, and that he was not eager to repeat.

They were at the airport, and he still didn't know how to announce to her that they were not going back to New York together. He had to take care of some business in London and had arranged with Raymond and Jose for them to pick up Ana at the airport, while he was dropping her off while in Paris.

She was talking about being excited to go to the duty free shops, when Christian blurted out, "I'm not coming back with you."

She turned her head, her eyes wide with incomprehension, and he caressed her face before explaining, "Some business came in last minute, and I will handle it better from here, than from New York. Jose and your father are going to pick you up at JFK."

"So your ditching our duty free shopping session?"

Christian smiled, and on an impulse, he leant to kiss her, despite the fact that he was in an airport with many cameras all over the place. Ana did not hesitate on kissing him back before she broke their embrace and let Christian know,

"Too bad, I was just coming out of my bad week. We could have celebrated like rabbits."

"Another time."

"When are you coming back? I could pretend to go at Kate's and wait for you."

"I don't know, to be honest. It's best if we wait for me to get back to set up a meeting."

"You better not take forever in here! We have the Christmas party, and Dad said you would be here!" She exclaimed. Christian smiled to her, kissing her forehead and inhaling her fragrance by the same occasion. She hugged him against her.

"I had a wonderful time with you this week, Christian. We should do it again. With more sex, and less drama."

Christian chuckled, and took her to the desk where she could register. He waited for her to pass the border, before texting both Raymond and Jose that she was on her way to be boarded. then, he checked how much time he had before his own plane took off, and sprinted to take a cab all the way to the little boutique where Ana had taken him at the beginning of the week. There he bought his Christmas present for her, sure that she would appreciate 'a not Christmas guy celebrating Christmas after all', and he rushed back to the airport to take his plane to London, four hours after Ana.

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

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**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ Okay ... so no cliffies now ...**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Ana and ****Christian?**

**💚Do you think that Christian will find ****Mike? (I'm asking again)**

**💚 What do you think of Christian and his present for ****Ana? And what will Ana get him. If you guess, I will answer any question you have ...**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

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‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Sofia: **_I am not sure you will keep on saying that a few chapters in ... I mean, everything has been nice and sweet so far ..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	20. Chapter 19: Sinful Christmas

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

💚**So I know my chapters are quite long, but I rather cut a chapter to follow the continuity of the story, rather than cut it for the sake of a cliffhanger, or to make it short. Sorry about the long long updates.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 19: Sinful Christmas ****(4,3K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

Two days after he left Ana in Paris, Christian was back in New York himself, with one less problem in his mind. Though having solved that problem only brought a worrying issue to Christian. When it came to dealing with people who were to double-cross him so openly, Raymond usually did that in person. It was who he was, and what he was known for. It helped with the image he gave the world (officially or not). And this time around, though Raymond had been aware of the problem, he had let Christian handle it on his own. And Christian didn't know how he should feel about that. He knew what it would ultimately mean on the long run, but he wasn't sure if he wanted that option to actually occur.

He was still walking his way out of his airport, lost in his thoughts of Raymond and the responsibilities that the older man seemed to be more and more eager to thrust upon Christian when he felt that someone was following him. He had half a mind to lose that person in the maze that was the airport, using the crowd as a diversion, but he was actually curious as to who would risk following him. After all, his face was starting to be well known, and in association with Raymond. Even more so in the underground business. Without flattering himself, Christian knew for a fact that certain persons feared him more than they feared Raymond.

On an impulse, he decided that he would confront the person behind him, though he was not going to make a scene. Instead, he went to a coffee shop, and sat there, waiting to see if the other person would have the guts to come out and sit in front of him. Which they did.

A middle-aged man sat in front of Christian, a coffee in hand, wearing a cheap suit. His hair was dishevelled, sparkled with grey all over it, though there was a streak on the front that was mainly grey. His eyes were big, round and clear; and his face was round, with a beard covering most of his cheeks. He smiled to Christian, sipping on his coffee, and though Christian didn't know that man, he could say one thing about him, his smile was inviting.

"It is quite hard to get you all on your own on public ground, you know?" The man said with a British accent, to which Christian barely reacted.

He had a fairly good idea of who that man was, or at least what his profession was, and now, he was wondering if there were others hidden in the crowd, ready to help their colleague.

"But where are my manners? I am Jason Taylor."

The man presented his hand to Christian, for him to shake it, and Christian simply smiled at him, ignoring the offered hand as he sipped on his tea. "And you are? Inspector? Detective? Special Agent?"

Taylor didn't seem destabilised by Christian's knowledge, just giving him a knowing smile as he put his hand back around his coffee cup. Christian looked around, trying to see if there was anyone paying them more attention than they should.

"Special Agent. So, do you have any guesses as to why I want to speak to you?"

"Because you are in need of friends? If I recall properly, there is a hotline for that, Agent Taylor," Christian countered, though he knew perfectly well that his relationship with Raymond and Idris were the real motives of the man.

But he also knew that the man had nothing on him, or he would have arrested Christian on the spot and taken him for interrogation. The agent politely chuckled, making Christian roll his eyes for he felt that this was going to take longer than he thought.

"I am actually interested in your friend Raymond Steele. Or shall I call him your mentor? From what I heard, you're following a bloody path."

"From what I heard, FBI agents had real motives if they wanted to harass honest citizens."

"I think you know very well what my motives are. Now, I am not here for small fishes, I want the big one. And for the moment, you are not it."

Christian longly stared into the man's clear eyes, a part of him wondering if this was how Lincoln had been approached in the past. Not that he was considering betraying Raymond, but he still wondered if this was the path that Lincoln had been on to, and what made him suddenly shift his loyalty.

Jason Taylor smiled, seeing that Christian was not willing to even put a pretence of a conversation, and he told him, "I have been working on your boss's case for years, Grey. And I'm the one who's going to bust him. Now, do you want to bite the dust with him, or go scar-free."

"If you've been working on this 'case' for years, it is obvious that you don't need my help. Though I wonder what the FBI has to gain to look in accounts of a business company such as Robinson Inc'. Still, if you find anything, let me know, and we will do what is necessary," Christian said with his most detached tone, before getting up, cutting short the conversation.

"You're not the first one Raymond is preparing to follow his footsteps. But now, no one knows what happened to Michael Steele. It's like he vanished into thin air. You might want to be careful around this man you are so eager to protect," Jason Taylor warned, getting up as well.

And for the first time in years, Christian was caught off guard. It lasted barely a split second, but still, it was there. When he recovered for his brief surprise, Christian looked at Agent Taylor with an eyebrow up, as if to say 'So what?', and he started walking away.

Of course, the man didn't seen to understand that this was his cue to leave, and followed Christian, only to tell him, "I would be suspicious of that man, if I were you. The man worships the ground his daughter walks on, and you take her to Paris … Changing the dates of arrival doesn't change anything, and we all know how short tempered Raymond is when it comes to his daughter."

The Agent looked at Christian with a full warning in his eyes, but all Christian could do was smirk at the idiot. He looked taken aback by Christian's reaction, but then finally left the blond man alone. Christian finally walked out of the airport, and once in the cab, he called Raymond to let him know if this encounter he just had with the FBI.

"I had an interesting meeting, as I came back," He told his boss, before explaining without too many details due to the fact that he was in a cab, "He was very vehement as to why I should start working for him and let you on a lurch. His name is Jason Taylor. He works for the same company as Lincoln did."

"I was wondering when he would show up. Did he convince you?"

"I think he's going to try something other than bribing me. But I will explain it to you tomorrow when I will see you," Christian said because he didn't want to have to censor himself when talking about what Jason Taylor said and implied.

"Oh, so you're still coming. And here I thought you would use the excuse of jet lag to see this one out," Raymond exclaimed, clearly knowing Christian well enough.

The next day was a social outing for Christmas, that Raymond and the Kavanaghs threw every year, and that Christian had been able to avoid until now. But this year, Raymond had insisted that Christian came, so he could meet people that he didnt get to meet otherwise. And Christian dreaded this moment to come.

"You should bring someone."

Christian rolled his eyes at this statement. He didn't want to go, and even less accompanied by some girl he was not going to talk to during the whole evening. Though Raymond made a point that got him reconsidering for a second,

"When you are accompanied, you have an excuse to get out of unwanted conversations."

"I'll keep that in mind for next time," Christian muttered before he hung up.

He was in front of his building and paid the cab driver his fare. He went to his place, tired, but not to the point to go straight to sleep. Especially knowing that it was barely nine, and that he would wake way too early if he went to bed now. So instead, he took a quick shower to wash away the drain of the flight, and got dressed to eat at Mrs Parvati.

In the lobby, he found Mia heading out herself, and when he found out that she was going out to eat herself, he proposed her, "Do you want to come with me? If you like Indian food, that is."

"Food is food. As long as there is a vegan option, I'm in," She responded with a smile.

"You're vegan?"

"I am. And before you ask, yes, I have all my proteins. No, I don't miss bacon. And if I were on a deserted island, yes I would kill you and eat you for asking this question."

Christian snickered at the blasé tone that she used, feeling that those were questions that she must have been asked pretty often, and that she was tired of answering. They walked into New York, going to Christian's favourite restaurant, and he asked her, "Aren't vegans usually really great cooks?"

"Aren't cooks allowed to a night out? I was at the library all day, and I really don't have the strength to cook. I would have ordered take out if I knew the place a bit better. Are there any good places around our place?"

"I wouldn't know. I'm not a takeout kind of guy. I usually eat at home. Mrs Parvati is the exception because her food is … to die for."

They got into the restaurant, Mrs Parvati exclaiming out loud how happy she was to see Christian, and surprised to see him with a girl. They joked around about the fact that she couldn't give him her daughter now if he loosely brought women in her own restaurant to eat with him.

When their food was ready and in front of them, Mrs Parvati left them to eat, and they dug into their food.

"You never brought your girlfriend here?" Ana asked, and for a second, Christian was destabilised.

"Girlfriend?"

She looked at him as if she was seeing him on a whole other light, before she slightly nodded and said, sure of herself, "You're not a girlfriend kind of guy."

For a moment, Christian didn't say anything, mostly because there was nothing to say. Officially, he didn't have a girlfriend, and he didn't even know if he could call Ana his girlfriend unofficially. Sure, it was heading in that direction for him, but Ana didn't seem to be ready for that kind of label.

Still, he explained to Mia, "It's just that I am not a sharing kind of guy."

"So there is a girl, you just don't talk about her."

Christian rose his eyebrow, silently asking Mia how did she expect him to answer, when he just told her that he was not the kind of person who liked to share their lives. She smiled at him, and asked him,

"Isn't it a bit lonely? Don't you have friends?"

"I do."

"Well … Don't you share with them your experiences as you live them?"

Though he felt Mia's gaze on him, Christian didn't look up and finished his rice, starting to question himself if it had been a good idea to propose to Mia to eat out with him. He had popped the question out of instincts, and it seemed that his instincts had failed him on this one. He was not good at socialising, especially not with the opposite sex, and it was starting to show.

Mia smiled at him, and nonchalantly ate the rest of her food, as she told him, "I know that we're not friends, but I was hoping we could be someday. And that's how you turn acquaintances into friends, you share."

"So, in clear, you want me to talk about my personal life to someone I barely know?" Christian said with a sardonic smile. Mia shrugged and pointed out,

"I'm not asking for your favourite position, but the basics. You tell me, I tell you, we share."

"Then, tell me a bit more about yourself…"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

As Christian had expected it, the Christmas party was an affair that would have been better if he had spent it in his apartment. Raymond had introduced him to many businessmen that were all more boring than their predecessors. It was a vicious circle in which Christian couldn't see an escape. Each new businessman was trying to explain why their business was the best, and why Robinson Inc' should consider investing in them.

He was saved from many small talks by Eamon, whilst Raymond watched him each time rebuke the advances made to him. At some point, Christian wondered if Raymond wasn't enjoying his pain a little too much, as if he were happy to make him suffer through all those mundanities that Christian was well known to hate.

Still, there were a couple of men with whom Christian had a good time. The first one being Ethan. Christian had never exchanged more than five words with him, and this party was the first time that he got to have a full-on conversation with the young man. And though Christian knew about his relationship with Jose, he never would have been able to guess otherwise. As he talked to the blue eyed man, Christian wondered how he and Jose even got together in the first place. They were so different and seemed to have nothing in common. Ethan was outgoing, jovial and definitely an optimist when it came to life; and though Jose wasn't a pessimist per se, he still always anticipated the worst outcomes of the situations he confronted.

The other pleasant surprise amongst all the vultures that Christian met, was Jack Hyde. Christian was actually surprised when he learnt his family name later on, and he was now eager to see the son take over his father's place. Jack seemed to be a clairvoyant man full of potential and with enough setback in life to take in considerations things that businessmen often tend to forgo (like the fact that hundreds of families often depended on the decisions they would make).

But the highlight of his night, the one thing that made him think that maybe it wasn't completely a loss of time being there was Ana. She arrived at the arm of Paul Clayton, and though Christian had known about it since Ana had texted him that she was taking Clayton to the party, he still didn't like the image. She was … sinful, as ironic as that statement was for a Christmas party. She was wearing a V-neck line red dress, where the décolleté went all the way down to her mid-stomach. The dress in itself was simple if one forgo the cleavage, and the slit on her right thigh that went all the way to her hipbone, and made Christian wish they could be alone the moment he laid eyes on her.

When came the time to eat, Christian sat at the same table as the two Steeles and the Kavanagh's. Katherine's fiancé was also sitting with them, next to Christian who had Ana for his other neighbour. The diner went rather dully, and rather slowly. Still, with stealth and assurance, Christian slipped into Ana's purse his gift for her. It wasn't that he didn't want to give it to her in person, but more that he felt that she would appreciate it more if her gift came out of nowhere. And since he knew that Ana didn't have his expert eye to see things as simple as someone putting something in your purse, he felt that she would get her Christmas miracle.

During the meal, they all talked about business, and the upcoming wedding, Christian got to see the youngest Kavanagh pitch his idea of boring school for the next year, he wanted to go to Switzerland, which made everyone smile at him, knowing that the educational program wasn't why he chose this country in particular.

Eamon started a conversation between Christian and Ethan, explaining to the latter that Christian had handled most of their last buy, and the two young men fell into a conversation, though Christian suddenly had to give it an extra focus when he fell a hand on his thigh.

He didn't have to turn to know that it was Ana, and when he strained a bit his ear to her, he heard that she was deep in conversation with Elena about a project she had thought off. And still, her hand kept on going higher and higher on his high, aiming for his now growing bulge.

Nothing on his face could give Christian away, even when she seized his member. Christian did his best to keep a straight face, doing his best to think more of the conversation he was having with Eamon and his son, than of Ana's tiny hand playing with his manhood. But still, he put his hand under the tablecloth to clench his fist when she started rubbing him a little quicker.

All throughout dessert, Ana kept on teasing Christian, a small smirk spread on her lips as Christian was doing his best to ignore what her hand was doing to him. Especially when Raymond came into the conversation. It was only when she tried to reach for his buckle that Christian put a stop to it, and bluntly got up, excusing himself and pretending to be in need of fresh air.

But of course, he didn't head for the freezing cold garden he had access to, instead, he wandered off to the first floor, relieved to find it quiet, and looked for a bathroom. Once there, he splashed his face with cold water, not believing that he was still hard as a rock, just because Ana had decided to be wild.

Ever since he had first been with a girl, Christian had always been very much in control of himself. He had never lost control with a woman, knowing that Nature had indulged him, and therefore he had to be more careful. And he had never been aroused like that, especially with a simple handjob.

He was trying to calm himself down, but Ana kept on popping in his mind with her sinful dress and her damn smirk. So he considered taking the matter into his own hands (literally), despite the fact that he never really liked the practice for he found it too messy. But before he could make a real decision about it, the door opened and closed, revealing Ana in her red dress.

The two of them stared at each other for a second, before Christian launched at her and kissed her hard on the lips. She yelped, jumping in his arms, and he secured the door closed before sitting her on the sink, ravishing her face and neck whilst his hands fumbled with her dress to find a way to her sweet spot.

When his fingers found the fabric of her barely-there panty, they were already met with moist, making him growl with pleasure as he bit on the lobe of her ear, careful not to hurt her with her earring. "Already ready for me? Or being naughty just turns you on?"

He slipped her out of her panty, before thrusting two of his fingers in her wet entrance, making her gasp and arch herself to him. As he circled his fingers inside of her, she undid his belt and took his member in her hand, moaning when their skin came in contact. "Christian take me. Take me, now!" She begged, already trying to guide him into her.

Christian took a small step backwards, feeling that he would blow the second he would penetrate her, and he made her stand up, before turning her and bending her. Then, he pushed away the fabric of the dress, just so he could see her perky little buttocks on full display and he took a condom out of his wallet to roll it on.

"This is going to be quick and rough, Ana. Hold on to the sink," He warned, his voice full of lust as his eyes landed on hers in the mirror. And though he did not think of that at first, now it appeared like a bigger turn on to watch themselves unfold.

Ana kept eye contact with him, until he harshly thrust in her, making her squeak and arch herself. Christian brought his hand to her mouth and started his back and forth movements, being rough and abrupt. The two of them watched the other in the mirror, Christian being more and more erratic, to the point where his free hand was clenching Ana's hip, his fingers in her skin.

He wanted to grab her hair to make her arch a bit more, just so he could feel her a bit deeper, but he didn't, not wanting to ruin her hair since he was sure that he had already ruined her makeup.

As Christian felt his orgasm come to him, stronger than ever, he also felt Ana bite down on his hand, a muffled moan coming out of her as he groaned out his own paroxysm, a relieved exhale coming out of him once he was spent.

For a couple of minutes, they did not say anything, nor even tried to move, simply trying to catch on their breath; but finally Christian slowly removed himself from Ana, grimacing when he heard her wince and thinking that he should have been more gentle with her. He kissed her shoulder with tenderness as he tied a knot in the condom and threw it in the bin.

"You will be the death of me," He told as he buttoned up his pants, and she smirked at him, not minding for a second. "And you've got lipstick smeared all over your face."

"So do you," She warned him, reaching for his face and erasing the lipstick that got on his mouth. Then, she checked him out, and tapped on his chest, "You're ready to affront the public eye."

Christian smiled at her and slightly pecked her lips, before leaving the bathroom, aware that people were going to start wondering where he had disappeared to. And when he said people, he mostly meant Raymond.

He actually found the Steele patriarch in a secluded room, drinking a brandy with several other businessmen. When Christian slipped into the room, Raymond's eyes immediately landed on him, before he made a small nod of the head for them to go in yet another room.

Once they were alone, Raymond sat in an armchair facing the fireplace, and Christian sat on the couch next to him, finding it weird that there was a fire already burning in the place when no one was in the room.

"You lasted longer than I expected. I thought you were going to blow out in the middle of dinner," Raymond remarked, turning the amber liquid into his glass.

Christian shrugged, keeping for himself that he had his own reasons for appreciating his dinner from where he was sitting.

"Anyway. So, you had the FBI, paying you a visit? Do I have to be worried?"

"Honestly, I don't think so. They have nothing, and were just trying to get me to give them a bone."

"So I repeat my question, do I have to to be worried?" Raymond reiterated, and Christian turned his head to look at his boss. He had always thought that if there was nothing he would never have to prove to his boss, it was his loyalty.

"If you think I would sell you out, I don't see what I am doing here," Christian flat out said, wondering if Raymond was testing him, or really doubting his loyalty.

Raymond smiled, leaning into his chair and sipping into his drink, "I was just checking."

Christian did not retort anything, looking back into the fireplace. His pocket buzzed, and he quickly checked who texted him, doing his best to repress his smile when he saw that it was Ana gushing about her Christmas present. Still, he did not respond back right away, and kept his face straight as Raymond told him, talking to the fire,

"I was actually wondering Christian … Is there anything you would like to talk to me about?"

Christian looked at the older man, wondering if he knew about what had just transpired in the bathroom upstairs. For a couple of seconds, Christian reasoned if should come clear, or if he was being paranoid and that Raymond knew nothing. And in the end, he decided that if Raymond knew anything about the way just treated his daughter, he wouldn't be drinking brandy and nonchalantly talking to him. And that was why he told his mentor,

"Not that I am aware of."

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**💚What did you think of the lemon between Ana and ****Christian?**

**💚Do you think that ****Raymond knows? Or do you follow Christian's logic as to why he doesn't know?**

**💚 What do you think of ****Taylor? And yes he will be a sort of recurring character ...**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Christian seems perfect because we are distorted by his POV. He is not a good man. He has no patience, no mercy and no empathy. And we will see that Ana is the only one who really knows about him. He doesn't open up easily, but he will, bit by bit. I wouldn't say he's traumatised in the way you'd think. Christian is someone who holds the grudge and he doesn't look back on his past. So that makes him only look forward to his future, hence the white picket fence and kids, he wants to give his kids the experiences he didn't get. I hope that made sense._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	21. Chapter 20: Mrs Claus

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 20: Mrs Claus ****(3,1K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Just a few texts**

**Oh, Christian! Thank you so much for the necklace. I LOVE it. You are so sweet. And now, I am even more glad about what happened earlier. Consider it as a big THANK YOU! Ana **

**How did you even manage to put it in my purse? I didn't see you near my purse at any moment! And when did you actually buy it? We were together all the time … Ana **

**I'm glad that you appreciate your Christmas gift. I was concerned for a moment that you might not like it. Christian **

**I do! Why would you think that? Ana **

**Because you did not buy the pendant yourself. Christian **

**That's a whole different story. I really love it, I'm never taking it off. Ana **

**If you like it so much, I should have given it to you in person. Christian **

**No, I don't mind the little magic you used. It was like being a kid again, surprised that Santa snuck into my house without me noticing. Except that Santa this year is way sexier than the one of my childhood **😏**. Ana **

**Maybe I should buy a red costume and practice my 'ho-ho-ho' for next year … Christian **

**Or maybe you should just wait and see if Mrs Claus pays you a visit the day after tomorrow … Ana **

**I haven't been that nice this year. Christian **

**Me neither. But Santa still gave me a beautiful present. So there is still hope for you. Ana **

**Well, since there isn't any chimney at my place, I will be waiting for her by the door. Christian **

**Good. Just know that she has to visit a friend first (Lucky friend is getting married), so don't expect her before nine. Ana **

**Okay. I will even buy cookies and milk for her (don't want to ruin Christmas traditions). Christian **

**Cookies? At your place? It should be Christmas every day! Ana **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

It was the day after Christmas, and Christian was waiting for Ana to come. It was still early in the evening, but he had wrapped up everything he had to do during the day in a hurry, just to assure that he wouldn't have to cancel on her. As promised, he had bought cookies, and even ice-cream (because ice-cream was Ana's greatest weakness). He was preparing a table for the two of them, with Mexican food that he had cooked, knowing that Ana could never say no to enchiladas, and he had to admit, he was earnest of her arrival.

He was also very curious as to what she could have gotten him and found himself comparing his eagerness to a kid on Christmas morning. And though he tried to put himself in Ana's shoes to see what she could have chosen as a present for him, Christian had no idea of what she was up to. It was at that moment that he realised how much Ana was right, and how closed off he was.

She didn't know him, because he didn't share much with her. The only thing personal that he told her was about that disastrous Christmas he had when he was eight, and even that, he told her because she pushed the issue. He barely told her about his parents and the way they abandoned him.

And that was why, as he was putting candles on the table, he made the decision to be more forward with Ana. Whether it was about him as a person, or about the relationship they had, he was going to talk more about himself, even if it meant going against his instincts. For instance, he was going to talk to her about the affair that they had and put a proper label on it.

He had been thinking about it ever since his dinner with Mia, and the more he thought about it, the less he liked that it wasn't clear what they were. During his meal with Mia, Christian talked a bit about Ana with the blonde girl, trying to bond with her. Of course, he never mentioned a name, or whatever that could link his mysterious girl to Ana; but in the end, Mia concluded that the two of them were too involved to be labeled as 'booty-calls'. Her smocking gun (as she called it) was the fact that twice they slept together in the biblical sense of the term, when Ana was on her cycle.

Though Christian did not mention to Mia that those two times happened on the rare occasions when they had the possibilities to be away together, out of the country, it still got him thinking. And the only thought that echoed in his brain was that Jose was right. He was more involved in that relationship that he ought to be. In his mind, Ana wasn't just someone to fool around with, but … his full girlfriend.

He was lost in his thoughts when the doorbell rang. Christian went to answer it with a big smile, happy to see Ana, even though she was way earlier than planned. But when he opened the door, he was faced with a whole different Steele. His surprise didn't show, and he immediately proposed his mentor to come in, though he was a bit suspicious to see him in his apartment.

"I just dropped Ana at Kate's, and I thought I'd ask you for a favour in person, instead of by text," Raymond explained as he made his way to the couch. Christian noticed the way his boss's eyes went to the dressed table in the kitchen, before he sat, a small smile on his lips.

"Expecting someone?"

Christian's heart stopped, but he let nothing transpire, smiling as if nothing as he sat in the armchair next to the sofa, waiting for Raymond to explain why he was there. Raymond glanced once again at the kitchen table, his face unreadable before he looked back at Christian and explained to him that he wasn't going to be long.

"Next week, Kate will be celebrating her twenty-first birthday. She already planned a big party here in New York, but she still wants to do something intimate with her mother and Ana."

"Vegas?" Christian asked, assuming that the young girl wanted to test her new milestone in the city where she could test it all at twenty one. Raymond chuckled a little and shook his head, rectifying Christian,

"Orlando. Rollercoasters and Disney princesses are apparently more alluring than gambling and alcohol."

The two men shared a small laugh.

"I would take it as a personal favour if you went with them," Raymond said, and Christian furrowed his brows a little, thinking of all the outcomes of that situation.

"Officially, or unofficially?"

"Officially. I couldn't put someone on Elena's tail without telling her," Raymond claimed, as if appalled by the very idea of it.

Christian looked down on the floor, his elbows on his knees while his fingers were joined, and he was trying to find the best way to refuse this to Raymond. He thought of implicating work, and the overload that was to come with New Year, but in the end, he opted for the truth,

"I don't think it's a good idea."

"Why not."

"Because you are sending me to follow three women you hold dear to your heart. I see why, but in the eye of an outsider, I am a guy tagging along in a girls trip to Disneyland."

"You're afraid of the image that would give you?"

"No. I just don't want to give a bone to Taylor's delusions."

Raymond frowned, clearly not following Christian's trail of thoughts, and the young man started to wonder if he should have mentioned at the Christmas party that the FBI assumed that Ana and him went to Paris because they were romantically involved. But he also knew why he did not let Raymond know about it. It wasn't that he thought that it would sparkle the idea in Raymond's mind, Christian knew his boss well enough to know that Raymond didn't need someone to whisper an idea in his ear, he just needed his eyes and instincts. But Raymond knowing that Ana and Christian going away lead to people thinking they were together, could lead to Raymond not asking Christian anymore to escort Ana when she wanted to go away.

He sighed, and looked up to tell Raymond, "Taylor thinks that your daughter and I are involved in something more than professional."

Raymond held Christian's gaze before a small chuckle escaped his mouth and he muttered, "Well, that is an interesting concept. My best man and my daughter … Is this the carrot Taylor hopes to make you sing with?"

"Taylor believes many things, but so do children who still believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy," Christian said, shaking his head. He still couldn't understand why Taylor targeted him to rat on Raymond. He wasn't the only one working for him, and he was sure that there were others that would be more easily persuaded than him.

Raymond looked at Christian, dissecting him to his very soul and making him feel that all his darkest secret were laid naked on the table, but then the older man looked away, and told Christian, "You're off the hook. I will send some other guys."

Christian nodded, though he was sure that his expression was guarded since Raymond pointed out, "You don't approve."

"I just think that … you could let them go on their own. They are going with a woman who has your entire trust."

"I trust Elena with my life, and I would never hesitate on putting Ana's in her hands as well. But Elena doesn't believe in violence, even when it comes to the worst scenarios."

Christian could tell that there was more than Raymond was saying, and actually, thanks to Mia, he now had a fair idea of what it was. But still, he felt that Raymond's protectiveness was a tad exaggerated at times, and this was one of those times. Raymond seemed to read in him, like in a book, because he had a disabused smile and told Christian,

"You think I'm being paranoid. You're just like Elena and Eamon. 'Give her space.' 'Don't suffocate the girl.' 'Let her experience her life'. But real life is tough, and I will be damned if I let my daughter learn that lesson the way I did."

Christian could see Raymond's point-of-view. Sure he didn't know how his boss grew up, but he always figures that life hadn't been kind on him, just like it hadn't been kind on Christian. He understood why Raymond was so vehement on protecting his daughter from the vicious world they were living in, but as he was about to agree with the older man, Ana's voice echoed in his mind, and he found himself being the devil's advocate.

"But she's not learning how difficult life is. She's not experiencing it. She can see it, but you and I both know that experience is what makes the character. Right now, Ana only sees life as easy, full of rainbows and unicorns, because you remove every obstacle from her path."

"_Ana_?" Raymond snapped. Christian's heart stopped, and he was sure that all colours left his face as he realised his slip up. He held his boss's gaze, pretending to not be affected at all by the way his brown eyes had suddenly turned hard and calculating.

"She doesn't like it much when I call her Anastasia to her face. It just stuck around."

It wasn't really a lie, because Ana really didn't like being called by her full name. It was actually one of the things that lead to their reunion, Christian calling her by her nickname. Raymond smiled at that, and let Christian know, "Of course she doesn't, it means that she is in trouble when someone calls her Anastasia."

Then, he got up, making Christian do the same, and he walked to the door as he told the coppered-haired man, "I should get going. You obviously have plans for tonight which don't include me being present, or me talking about my daughter."

Christian walked Raymond to the door, keeping for himself that _he_ had plans that included Raymond's daughter being present. Once Raymond left, Christian felt a pressure leave his shoulders, and he figured he would have to work on his poker face even more next time. He knew that Raymond could interpret a single blink and that he was usually right, and he did not want to give Ana any reason to stop seeing him. Her father knowing, being the primal one.

Ana arrived an hour after her father left, on time as promised. She rang the doorbell, and Christian found her standing in the doorway, wearing a trench coat, her hands in her back. He smiled at her, leaning to kiss her, but she stopped him,

"Close your eyes, and open them when I tell you so."

Christian did as told, feeling her move from in front of him, to somewhere in the apartment, and half a minute later, she told him to open his eyes. When he did, he turned and saw that she was wearing a Mrs Claus outfit, though he doubted that Mrs Claus was supposed to look so delicious, or that she wore dresses that stopped mid-thigh.

He bit his lips, making his way to her like a predator to his prey, and once he was at arm's length, she put her arms in front of her, revealing a heavy box wrapped with paper.

"Merry Christmas," She said with a bright smile. Christian thanked her, dismissing the box to take her in his arms, but she insisted, "You have to open it _now_."

With curiosity, Christian took the box to the counter, and he rose his eyebrow to her when he swore that something moved inside of it. "It's not the box in a box in a box prank, is it?"

"No. Open it, quick."

He did, and was surprised to find a scared little kitten his litter box. The cat had ginger hair, and surprisingly blue eyes, and when he tried to meow, Christian couldn't help but smile as the feeble sound that escaped his mouth. He opened the later door and reached to grab the cat who was shivering in a corner.

Once in his arms, Christian started petting the kitten, leaning to kiss Ana's hair and thank her, and she explained, "I thought you would like the company. I mean, I'm sure you feel terribly lonely when I'm not here. Plus it's a good exercise to prepare for kids."

"I thought that dogs were friendlier than cats," Christian remarked, though he was still petting the feline. Ana pointed out,

"They are also more maintenance, and you're not always home. A cat can survive a day without you, a dog will pee all over the place."

Christian nodded his agreement and went to the cupboard to take a small bowl so he could give water to the little thing whilst Ana explained all her master plan,

"It's a male that I bought with Kate when I came back. She's the one who has been keeping him, and feeding him and training him to the litter. She was hoping you wouldn't like him, so she could keep him. He needs to be vaccinated next week, and his breed is … Ojos Azules. Apparently it's a new Mexican breed, and … well, I didn't pay much attention to what the seller said. Just take him to the doc."

Finally, Christian let go to the ball of hair who rushed to the water, and he took the brunette in his arms, kissing her longly and passionately. "Thank you for my present. I think I will call him Bastille."

"Bastille?"

"Because this is where I bought you that necklace," Christian explained, touching the pendant and making Ana blush with pleasure.

The two of them ate under the candles, Ana appreciating the irony of Christian having cooked Mexican when she bought him a Mexican cat for Christmas. Bastille did request a lot of attention, quickly warming up to Christian and rubbing against Christian all throughout dinner. Ana was delighted that Christian took her gift so well and bragged that she was well known to always pick the right gift for the right person.

"Now, I need to know when is your birthday," She told him, as they were getting ready to go to bed.

Christian smiled, Bastille going crazy as he was trying and failing to climb the bed. The two of them laughed at his fifth attempt before Christian took pity on the kitten and helped him up as he explained to the brunette, "You will have to wait for another nine months. It was in September."

"What?! How come you didn't tell me!?"

Christian shrugged, taking her in his arms, ready to dismiss the issue, when he thought better of it, "I highly doubt we have had the same birthdays. I will tell you all about it, but at another time. Tonight isn't the time to bring sour memories."

"You'll tell me about it?" She asked with surprise, her blue eyes wide open. Christian nodded, kissing her nose.

Ana smiled and snuggled against him, spooning with him as Bastille took his place next to her. She petted him, making him purr and Christian caressed her bare arm with sweetness.

"Ana?"

"Mmh?"

"I'd like to redefine our relationship." He felt her tense up, so he kissed her neck and told her, "You are not my booty-call. Not anymore."

She turned her head so she could look at him, with a smirk, "Why? You got yourself a new booty-call?"

"No. I got myself a girlfriend," He retorted with the same smirk, before leaning and softly kissing her lips.

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So please do not misinterpret what just happened! Bastille is ****Christian's, and not Ana's and Christian's. He is not a sort of 'first child' or anything. He is a gift to Christian (though I don't like saying it like that because he is a living creature). **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Raymond and ****Christian?**

**💚Do you think that Christian is right about Raymond's overprotectiveness? And what do you think of Christian thinking like Ana out of the blue?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana's present?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Well, no sexiness in the chapter, but definitely cuteness. Hope you liked it just as much. Can't wait for you to read more._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	22. Chapter 21: What Happened To Miss Robins

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 21: What Happened To Miss Robinson ****(6,1K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**So, please, pay attention to the ages playing, and know that Raymond and Eric are two years older than Elena ... Just saying ...**

**💚 Also, can anyone tell me why this title? I mean, the answer is in previous chapters, but does anyone ****remember?**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Elena's PoV**

She was getting ready for dinner, all the while listening to her youngest son trying to sell his cause to go to a Swedish boarding school. Weirdly enough, it was her husband who was more opposed to the idea than her, despite the fact that she had always thought that it would be harder on her to see their children leave, especially the youngest one. But she was completely okay with Jake going to Europe for a whole year, whereas Eamon was firmly against it.

With a small sigh, she smiled at her child and gently tapped his cheek, letting him know, "I am meeting Raymond. So if you want to keep campaigning, you all have to wait for your father to come back from his business trip tomorrow."

"But Dad will say yes if you do."

"You could come with me. I'm sure Raymond would appreciate seeing you," She eluded, making Jake roll his eyes,

"Uncle Ray is certainly not going to help me get to boarding school. If you were to listen to him, we all would have been tutored, only allowed to go out twenty minutes a day for daily intake of vitamins D."

Elena couldn't help but laugh, fully aware that Jake wasn't far from the truth, but she did not give her son cause and repeated that he would have to deal with his father about this issue. Then she left and met her longtime friend at The Mile High. They sat together, and Raymond asked about her husband.

"Oh you know, he's supposed to come back the day after tomorrow. So there is a high risk of Jake trying to throw a party for his one night of freedom since Ethan is no good at refusing him anything," She explained.

She and the girls were leaving the very next morning to Orlando to celebrate Kate's birthday, and she knew that her son would definitely try to appear like the cool kid of his class by throwing some forbidden party. Though, since he was trying to get on his parents' good favours lately, maybe he would be on his best behaviour.

"Ethan mentioned taking him to the movies. That ought to kill his party plans," Raymond said as their meal was put in front of them. Then, he warned Elena, "The Chef was fired yesterday, so be as critical as you can."

"You fired the Chef?"

"No. The manager did. Something about the Chef stealing from the fridge. I don't really want to know. I wouldn't actually know if Ethan hadn't told me when I saw him for lunch."

Elena smiled, and took a bite out of her food, before she asked him, "What are you getting Kate, by the way?"

When Ethan turned twenty-one, Raymond gave him the keys to this very restaurant, telling him that a business was a better investment than a trust fund. He had told him that it was now up to him how he intended to manage The Mile High and that everything that would ensue would be his total responsibilities. Whether it was profit or loss, it would all fall on Ethan's shoulders.

And for the four years Ethan had had The Mile High, everything had been going well. The first thing he did was hire a manager because he was fully aware that his knowledge in management and restoration was lacking. He actually hired one of the girls that Elena and Jose had helped get back on tracks (though he was not aware of that) and paid her a fair price, but that resulted with Alice holding her team with a firm hand, and the restaurant slowly but surely making a bit more profit each year.

"I am not sure yet. There is Esclava, but I see more Jake handling a bar, than Kate. I was thinking of Pandemonium, but it is going under some renovations, and I don't want her to think I'm giving her a dump."

"She'd never think that. You should actually give it to her before the renovations are done, so she can put her touch. She will love putting her personal style into the club."

Raymond nodded, taking notes of Elena's thoughts.

"What will you get Ana?" She asked, curious of what extravagant measure Raymond would go to with his own daughter.

She had always felt like Raymond spoiled her children too much and didn't hesitate to put her foot down on certain occasions (like when Raymond had wanted to fly in Ethan's favourite band for his graduation), but the spoil Raymond gave to her children was nothing compared to the one he gave to his own. She was always surprised to see that Ana didn't turn out to be a brat and that she understood that sometimes things couldn't go her way. Though she put that side of Ana that was rather down to earth, to her grandparents' benefits.

"Paris seems to have really had an impact on her," He said, apparently lost in his thoughts, and when Elena looked up, she saw the usual pain that was on his face when he was thinking of his late-wife.

A part of her couldn't understand the sense of loss that Raymond felt over Carla. She knew that, had Eamon died on her, she would have moved on. She couldn't tell how she just knew that she would have moved on. Eamon would have still held a place in her heart, but she wouldn't be heartbroken just thinking about him fifteen years later. She thought it was romantic that Raymond still loved his wife like the first day, that he felt like he was cheating on her when another woman was trying to flirt with him, that he was thinking of her every day. But she knew it wasn't her. It wasn't that she didn't love Eamon with all her heart, it was just… the way she was.

"It was the first time she saw homeless people, there."

"Well, you can't blame her. She goes from your house to a car, to our place. When she stops, it's in very posh districts where homeless are rarely left alone," Elena reasons, hoping that this might be an opportunity for Ana to see more of the actual world, outside of the bubble Raymond had created around her.

Raymond poorly nodded and went on, "That's what she mainly reproached me when she came back. She was really shaken up by the amount of homeless she saw, and she was really upset when she learnt that New York is no better. She kept on saying that it was winter and that it was so cold outside, and no one was helping those poor people…"

His voice broke down, and Elena gently caressed his hand, stating the obvious, "She reminded you of Carla."

He shook his head, regaining control of his emotions, and he told her, "So to answer your previous question, I was thinking of buying her that building in Queens. She has this project about giving free health care and homing to them, trying to help them get a job. I thought she would appreciate this more than getting a business."

"She definitely will. But you should get someone who knows how to handle non-profitable organisations. You know, so she doesn't get in over her head."

"To be honest, she's already looking for someone. She's really invested in this project of hers."

"That's a good thing. I know it's hard for you because it was what Carla used to do. But Ana needs to find her passion and her reason to be," She said with a soothing voice.

"I know. I just… still have to remind myself that she is no longer a little girl… Which is the reason why I won't send anyone with you to Orlando."

Elena stopped eating altogether, staring at the man she had known since she was three with shock. Raymond had always been rather protective of the people he loved, and he became fully overprotective after his wife died. He always knew everything there was to know about his child or godchildren, he always did his best to keep them safe. She had come to live with it, knowing that their upbringing and the way his wife had been taken away from him had had their toll on him, and this was why she was so surprised by this turn of event.

Raymond had a small smile, and told her, "It had been brought to my attention that I was sending my daughter with the person I trusted more in this world and that I should take that into consideration."

"_Christian_ managed to make you change your mind?" Elena said with disbelief.

She had no doubts that if anyone could make Raymond change his mind on any decision he had, it was Christian Grey. She knew that over the years, Christian slowly replaced Mike's place in Raymond's heart and that Raymond highly valued Christian's opinion, though she doubted that he ever told him about it, or about Mike. But still, she never thought that Raymond would listen to anyone who would advise for him to loosen his security over Ana.

"Well, he mentioned that a girls trip was better spent just between _girls_. He also said things that got me thinking. Ana wouldn't have been so traumatised by Paris if I had let her go out on her own more whilst in here."

Elena nodded, glad to see that Raymond could see a bit of lucidity through the thick cloud of overprotectiveness he put around his daughter. They kept on eating, talking about the various things the girls had planned to do while in Orlando, and when dessert came, Elena let her friend know,

"I am going to talk to Kate whilst we are there, Raymond. Ana too."

He acknowledged her statement, aware of what she was talking about, since he bounced on it, "You should talk to Christian as well."

Elena made a grimace and focused on her dessert. It wasn't much that she didn't like Christian, or that she didn't trust him, but more that there was something about him that she couldn't really identify. Therefore, she couldn't really bring herself to talk about one of the most important moments of her life. But she eluded the topic, by stating,

"I don't think I will have too. I think that Mia already took care of that."

Raymond rose an eyebrow at her, surprised by her words, and she explained her point-of-view on the matter, "I saw them coming back to the building together rather late a couple of times. And Christian's name comes back often in Mia's mouth when she talks about how she is getting along in her new life."

"And Mia told you that she told Christian about you?"

"No. But either she already did it, either she will do it at some point. Though, now that I think of it, I don't think she already told him after all. Otherwise Christian would have mentioned something when I saw him this morning."

"If Christian knows, he won't say a thing until you tell him yourself. He'll respect that part of you to let you come out on your own," Raymond reasoned, sure of himself and of the young man. And Elena couldn't help but smirk, pointing out,

"'Coming out'. I'm not announcing to my parents that I'm gay, Raymond. We're just talking about sharing a part of my past with someone close to you."

"Someone that may be close to you in the future."

Elena rolled her eyes, though she did not doubt for a moment that Christian would replace her friend at the head of his mob. She just found it a bit morbid how Raymond always talked about his possibility of being replaced, as if he was talking about the weather. Raymond was in good health, and if Elena could tell one thing about Christian, it was that he would do his best to keep his boss safe. So Raymond should stop mentioning his succession like one mentions turtlenecks when it is cold outside.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Elena's PoV**

"This was the best day of my life," Kate said with excitement as they were exiting the Harry Potter theme park. They had kept that special park for their last day, and it did not disappoint.

She had sparkles in her eyes, her breath still short with the last ride that they just had. Ana exchanged a knowing look with Elena, the two of them aware of Kate's love for the universe that JK Rowling had created. The author could do no wrong in the blonde's eyes, even when it came to her latest films that Ana had found dull and contradicting at times with the original series.

With a smirk, she bumped her friend's shoulder and winked at Elena as she said, "Elliott is going to be so disappointed when I tell him that you liked a theme park better than his proposal."

Elena and Ana laughed as Kate was trying to explain with vehemence that those were two different things, and Ana kept on egging her friend,

"I think you should move your wedding to London. So Elliott can pretend that your excitement for the Harry Potter Studios is for him."

"Ana! You're not funny!" Kate whined, glancing at her mother for some support. But Elena was laughing with Ana at the expense of her daughter, even pointing out,

"I always thought he reminded me of Harry. Remember those glasses he had when you all became friends?"

"_Mom_! Elliott and Harry are _nothing_ alike! Harry has green eyes!" Kate shouted with outrage, insulted that her mother could make such a comparison when the difference was so obvious to her.

Elena gently smiled at her daughter, knowing that she had had always had a soft spot for the fictional character. She remembered very well when she hit puberty and her hormones came in, how she plastered her room with pictures of the hero (whether it was the actor or fan-art of what Harry would look like). Ana had been more down to earth on this one. She didn't fantasise much, though Elena knew very well that she had a crush on her eldest son. Crush that lasted until the day he came out.

Eamon and her were actually concerned about this part of Ethan's life. Not so much because he was gay, this hadn't really come out as a surprise, and they loved him nonetheless. But it had more to do with the fact that Ethan had always introduced his partners to them, and that whoever he was seeing at the moment was a big secret to them, now. She knew that he was seeing someone, and when she tried to lightly bring the topic, he didn't deny it. But he would still not present them his new boyfriend, and to Elena, it could only mean one thing. The new boy was bad news.

During their way back to their hotel, the girls talked about what they could do for Ana twenty-first birthday and to Elena's greatest surprise, Peru was on the top of the girl wish-list.

"What are you going to do in Peru?"

"Visit the Machu-Picchu, and bath in the Titicaca Lake," Ana brightly said with a smile, earning a concerned look from her friend.

"You want us to climb a mountain for your birthday? Are you nuts? Why not walk the Great Wall of China!?"

"First of, Machu Picchu is a village that is situated high on a mountain. Second, I keep the Great Wall for my thirties. I think it will have more impact," Ana's said matter-of-factly, before sitting on the sofa and removing her shoes.

Elena had a small smile because out of the two girls, Kate had always been the more urbanite one. Ana always loved doing sports when Kate always had to be dragged to it; and the couple of times they went to the countryside, Ana was always outdoorsy, running the hills with her father on her heels making sure she was okay.

"Anyway, I'm going to have a shower, and then we can choose where we will have our last meal in Orlando. Okay?"

She was already on her way to the shower, when Elena stopped her, "I was thinking we could have some room service, and we could talk a little…"

Ana shrugged, saying that she didn't mind either way and went to the bathroom. Kate looked at her with tired eyes, this whole week of uninterrupted fun finally catching up, and she let herself slump on the sofa, asking, "Can't we have takeout instead. I feel like eating Thai."

Elena watched her daughter close her eyes, mumbling something about taking a shower after dinner, and she ordered some food for the three of them. Ana came out of the bathroom in a cloud of steam, just when the food arrived, and the three women ate together, each comfortably sitting on either a couch or an armchair.

Halfway through dinner, Elena finally opened up about what she had wanted to share with the two girls for such a long time, but never had the strength to go with,

"I want to talk to you about something that I have pushing off ever since you were thirteen. There was always a good excuse for me to postpone this talk, and I guess now that you are soon getting married, I can't wait any longer."

"Mom, we already know all about sex. I'm sorry to tell you that, though my dress will be white, it won't reflect my purity," Kate whined, clearly embarrassed by what she thought her mother wanted to talk about.

Elena smiled as if nothing, but her eyes weren't on the girl, they were lost into space,

"I know, honey. What I want to talk to you about has nothing to do with sex. And it's something that I never told Ethan, and don't plan on telling Jake. I only told your father because… well, he ought to know, he is my husband and I can truly say that he loves me. And still, even though I love Eamon with all my heart, even though I know he is my Prince Charming, he is not the man of my life.

Let me explain. To me, the man of my life is the one who will come and help me out of the worst situation, no matter the consequences for him. Eamon is the man of my dreams, but Raymond is the man of my life. And… don't get me wrong, but no matter how much you love Elliott, no matter how much he loves you, the only men you can depend on are your brothers.

When the goings get rough, when you are at your lowest, the only men who will pick you up and not judge you are your brothers

[…]

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Elena's PoV (4 years old)**

She was crying in an alley, lost and scared out of her mind. They had moved to a new neighbourhood with her father and uncle, and now she had lost herself, running after a butterfly. She looked around, trying to find something that she might recognise, but everything was ugly out there.

She missed Kansas, and the house they had next to a farm. Everything was grey and walls here. She could barely see the sky. The smell was awful. And it was so noisy. No one would hear her if she screamed for help. She crouched, crying even more and wishing she could just be back in Kansas when she heard boys laughing behind her.

She turned and saw two boys a bit older than her, playing football, completely ignorant of her. The ball itself was so old that part of the leather had gone, and the boys weren't dressed very nicely. _Proper_ her mother would have said. They weren't dressed proper. Or was it properly, she didn't know.

She watched them play, forgetting a bit of her chagrin when the ball was kicked her way, and the boys finally took notice of her. One had light brown hair and the other dirty blond hair. Almost like a Barbie doll. The two boys walked to her, and the one with brown hair asked,

"Hey, are you new around here?"

She nodded but did not say a word. Her mother had always told her not to speak with strangers. The one who talked kept on talking,

"So you must be with the truck full of boxes. We're neighbours."

He smiled, but the other one frowned, apparently not happy. "It's a bit far from the house. Aren't you a bit young to be alone?"

"I am not! I am a big girl! I am four, almost five for your information," She exclaimed because she was tired of being babied.

Everyone talked to her like she was stupid ever since her mother died. She was not stupid. She understood that her mother would not come back. She understood that her baby sister would never come home. She understood very well that she had to be a big girl and give her mother to her baby sister, so the baby wouldn't be scared and all alone. She still had her Daddy.

As she said those words, she started stomping away from the boys, and the Barbie one caught up with her, and pointed the opposite direction, "Your house is this way."

She stared at him, not sure what she should say, and settled for a small thank you. He shrugged it off, and the two boys walked her home. It turned out that the one with brown hair was named Eric and was living next door, while Raymond was living just right across the street.

When she arrived in front of her new house, her father snatched her in his arms, telling her how worried he had been, and her uncle ruffled with her har, before kissing her. She waved the boys goodbye, but they did not go back to their own homes. They left to play somewhere else in that ugly neighbourhood that was smelly and noisy

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Elena's PoV (12 years old)**

It had been two years since her father died of a lost bullet, and it was becoming harder and harder to live with her uncle. He was always drunk and had taken a nasty habit of ending up in her bed, the only place of solace she ever had ever since they moved in. It wasn't anymore. She actually dreaded going to bed, and how it suddenly held a whole different meaning for her.

Twice already they had an expulsion notice, but she wasn't worried much about it. Raymond and Eric had both promised her to take her in if she were evicted. She knew that they were living on their own in some abandoned house a few blocks away because they didn't want to end up in foster houses. The three of them had known a foster kid, and they had all decided that living on their own was better than being the slave of some family pretending to love them.

She did not tell them about her uncle, because… well, she felt ashamed. Ashamed that she wasn't strong enough to thwart him off. Ashamed that her own flesh and blood wanted to do such things with her. And ashamed of her own body sometimes.

She was walking back from school (being the only one out of the trio who still went to school on a regular basis), when Raymond surprised her, appearing out of nowhere. She smiled at him and for a few moments, they walked side by side in silence.

"I am going out of town for a few days," He told her, his hands in his pockets. Elena knew that Eric and Ray had started taking jobs that decent people usually didn't take. But decent people didn't have to _survive_ in their neighbourhood either. She didn't blame them, and even less judge them, but she had to admit that she was a bit scared about this new mission.

"Don't worry, Eric is staying. So if you get evicted, he can take you in," He assured her, before falling back into silence.

This was something very common for him, not talking much. Eric liked to talk with Elena, the two of them talked for hours about the few years of true happiness they had with their folks, about their dreams, about how they were all going to get out of there one day. Raymond was a great listener, but not much of a talker.

He glanced at her, his eyes lingering a second more on her neck, before looking back in front of him. "Everything alright at home? I heard David got fired from yet another job."

Elena shrugged as she unveiled part of the truth, "He's still drinking, nothing new about that."

"Nothing new? What about that bruise?"

Elena quickly pulled up her collar, her face turning red as she became aware that it was anything but a bruise. She was about to lie and pretend she fell down, but abstained and simply shrugged. Both Raymond and Eric knew her too much to believe in her lies.

Raymond stopped her, forcing her to look at him, and she held his gaze the best she could, almost defying him to say a single word. For a moment, it seemed that he would say something, when he resumed his walk, fishing something in his pocket, and giving it to Elena. "So you can eat."

She looked at the five bills of ten bucks and thanked him. It wasn't the first time that either him or Eric had given her money for food or clothing, and her uncle never questioned where the food was coming from. She thought about it for a moment and decided that she would make a heavy meal for dinner, in the hope that he would be too full to do anything.

And that was why she parted ways with Raymond, going to the convenient store and buying the ingredients to make a lasagna. On her way home, she thought of the homework she still had to do, happy that this was the one good thing that went okay in her life, she had more than good grades.

When she came come, the house was unusually quiet, so she started making dinner, thinking that her uncle simply was out buying booze. But just as she was chopping the onions, Raymond came out of her room, his hands covered in blood.

She stared at him in horror, fighting to fin her voice. "What happened?" She finally asked, her voice smaller than a mouse's squeak.

"I think you should go get Eric," He simply told her, and though his voice was determined, she could see in his eyes that he was a bit defeated.

Slowly, she made her way to her bedroom, where she found her uncle butchered, a knife still planted on his chest and a cloth in his mouth. For a split second, relief coursed through her, knowing that her nightmare was over, but then, adrenaline took over her, and she rushed to the boys' place and yanked Eric all the way to her house, not even taking the time to breathe and explain to him what had happened.

When Eric arrived, his eyes immediately landed on his best friend's bloody hands and saw he made his way to Elena's bedroom, just like she did before him. Elena followed him, though she stayed on the threshold so she could keep an eye on Raymond who was blankly staring at the wall.

"Elena .." Eric asked with a small voice that seemed to come from six feet under. "Was your uncle molesting you?"

"How would you know?" She asked back, not understanding why Eric wasn't seeing the bigger picture, being their friend and his bloody hands.

"Because he is in your bedroom with his cock removed from his dead body. It's the only explanation for Ray to do that specific thing."

Elena hung her head low, and before she knew it, she was in Eric's comforting arms shushing her sweet words of comfort. She started crying, and they stayed like that for a few minutes, before Eric went to his friend.

The two teenagers stared at each other, before Ray said, "You need to take her away. I'll call the police, and let them take me. There are my fingerprints all over the place."

Eric looked at his friend, before shaking his head and looking through the kitchen drawers. When he found the butcher's knife, he explained,

"There is a pig farm two miles from here. We chop him off and feed him to the pigs. Except for the head. We throw it in a woodchopper and scatter the chunks."

For an incredible long second, the three kids looked at each other, before silently agreeing to the task at hand. The two boys worked on the corpse, whilst Elena was erasing any trace of the murder since neither of the guys wanted her to handle the gruesome part of the operation.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**No one's PoV (17 & 19 years old)**

When Raymond got home, he was extenuated. Starting his own circle in the underground appeared to be much more of a hassle than he had anticipated. Still, with the help of Eric, he had managed to make himself a reputation, though it wasn't enough for him. He wanted more. As Eric said, he wanted to finally look down all of those who had looked down upon him whilst they were growing up. And he knew the best way to do that was to kill them from the inside. He needed to have his company, to make sure that _everyone_ would respect him, not just the thugs and dealers.

Eric and him had some savings, but it was nothing that would help them create a company. Barely half of it. It would take them a few other years to finally have the money necessary for his plans of grandeur. Eric was really good at finding money where no one would think of, and he was even better at making money grow with nothing.

As he was thinking of all his money problems, Elena came into the house and sat next to him. Weirdly enough, even though they now had the means to move to a nice neighbourhood, none of them ever expressed the desire to. So they simply managed to make this house their home. Just for the three of us.

After what happened with her uncle, Elena moved in with them and quit school. Though she would go out every day, and often at night as well, but the few times the guys had asked her what she was up to, she clearly expressed that it was her own private time. They never really talked about what happened, though Elena made a point to thank them both and to let them know how much she appreciated what they did for her. Raymond also took from Eric's cool at the situation and learnt to take things from another perspective, instead of always going with the first solution.

Raymond was starting to drift off to sleep when his eyes focused on Elena's boots. It was something that was out of her usual style. Long boots that went all the way up her thighs, met with a mini skirt.

"What are you wearing?" He asked, his brows furrowed. He had never looked at Elena in another than the little girl he met in the streets, covered with dirt and tears, just like he never looked at Eric in another way than the boy who was slapped across the face by his junkie mother. They were more than his friends, they were the family he made himself. But that particular day, Elena looked like a woman, especially in her revealing outfit.

Elena shrugged, getting up and going to her bedroom; and Raymond followed alarmed.

"Something wrong?" She closed the door, and he kept on knocking, asking her to talk to him. When she reopened the door, she had her normal clothes on, and she handed him a heavy duffle bag.

"I think there is enough in here for you to start your company," She said.

Raymond blankly stared, afraid to connect the dots, and he allowed himself a few more moments of disillusion, asking her, "Where did you get the money, Elena?"

She gave him a look, knowing that he wasn't that stupid that she would have to spell it out for him, and went to take a shower. Ever since she was thirteen, she had been selling her body to the highest bidder, and the more years went by, the higher were the bid. She knew that given her education, it was her quickest way to make some money, and she had enough trust in Raymond and Eric to make profits of their company. She would have gladly followed their way of life, but both boys were highly against it. So she chose what she knew, thanks to her pervy uncle.

Raymond watched Elena lock herself in the bathroom before he numbly walked back to the living room where he found Eric drinking a beer. He sat next to him, letting the bag fall on the floor, and barely heard Eric ask where it came from. It was only when Eric opened the bag and that the money was visible, that his dam broke, and tears escaped from his eyes.

"Shit man! What's wrong?!"

"It's from Elena," Was all Raymond said, and Eric froze altogether, understanding how Elena could have come up with that amount of money. Eric glanced at the corridor, his heart broking for his friend and feeling like he had failed in doing something very important.

"Why would she —" He started with a strangled voice, unable to finish his sentence, but Elena answered nonetheless,

"Because we needed the money, and it's the only good thing I am good at."

"Who put that stupid idea in your head?!" Raymond roared, simply wishing for a name for him to take his anger out on.

"It's the truth. I made peace with it, you will have to do the same."

Raymond's eyes seemed to go out of their sockets, but Eric made him sit back, silently telling him to stay calm. Raymond glared at the bag, and sneered, "We don't want your money. You've earned it, you keep it."

"Are you telling me that I've laid on my back for four years over nothing?" Elena asked tears in her eyes. "Are you telling me that this money wouldn't help you? Why wouldn't take it? Because it came from me?"

"Exactly! I am not taking money from you!"

"But you would take it from Eric? Or from any lowlife criminal you work with? Is it because I had to whore myself to get it?"

Raymond looked at his friend, not believing how he could not have seen it for four whole years. He was supposed to protect her, and it seemed that he only kept on failing her. Maybe he should have turned to the police, and none of this would have happened.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Eric asked, and Elena looked back at him, obfuscated that Raymond did not answer her question.

"So you could stop me?"

"Yes. We would have found the money some other way."

"There is more than half a mil in that bag. Tell me how you would have made that kind of money?" She challenged him and Eric was at a loss of words.

Elena looked down, the day she had been so anxious about finally there, and she told the two people that mattered most to her, "I am going to stay at a motel tonight and look for a place in the morning. It is obvious that my presence is no long—"

"I swear if you finish that sentence I am going to lose it," Raymond threatened, standing up and towering over the girl with all his might. "Don't you even dare _think_ that any of us would rather see you in the street, or that we see you differently. The fault of this isn't on you. And I'm going to make sure this never happens again."

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So we finally know more about Raymond's past, and Elena's. it wasn't all pretty and unicorn-y... And now, we know why Raymond is against prostitution and sex trade**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the conversation between Raymond and Elena****?**

**💚What do you think of Elena's decision to only share her story with the girls?**

**💚 What do you think of the flashbacks?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚** What do you think will happen next?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Well, this chapter was definitely a bit sad, but I hope you liked it nonetheless._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	23. Chapter 22: Tears In Heaven

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 22: Tears In Heaven ****(3,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian was reading the day's newspaper on his couch when Bastille jumped on his laps and required a bit of attention. With a small smile, he properly placed the kitten on his laps and moved the newspaper to not disturb the small ball of hair nestled against him. Absentmindedly, he caressed his pet whilst his eyes were looking through the WallStreet section, and a thought occurred to him. Why didn't Raymond ever try to invest in the stock market?

It had been a while since he thought that he himself should find himself a stock to invest in, just a contingency plan. But the more he thought about it, the more he wondered why Raymond never explored that option. He was actually becoming more and more interested in the fluctuation of a special stock that he was sure would pay off later on.

After thinking about it for a few more minutes, Christian decided to call Raymond and propose him to make money without having to move a single finger. Before pressing the call button, he still hesitated a little. Not because he thought Raymond would mind his proposal, but because he knew that today was a mournful day for the Steele's. Ana's grandfather had passed away a couple of days after she came back from Orlando, and though he wasn't Raymond's father, Christian knew that Raymond still cared for his late wife's father. They had buried him earlier in the day, so Christian was pretty hesitant on disturbing Raymond on such a day.

Still, he pressed the call button and waited for his boss to answer to him, which he did after the second ring.

"I'm not disturbing you, I hope."

"No, don't worry. What is it, Christian?"

"I was wondering if you ever thought of investing?"

"I do invest every day, Christian. Except the law calls it illegal loans of money, or money laundering."

Christian repressed himself from chuckling because Raymond wasn't wrong. It was all a question of point-of-view. Still, he clarified his thought, "I meant, did you ever think of investing in Wall Street."

There was a small silence before Raymond let him know, "Eric suggested it at some point, but I don't like the idea of it."

"Why not?" Christian asked though he was now uncomfortable having had suggested something that Lincoln had suggested earlier on. He didn't like knowing that the two of them had the same trail of thoughts.

"I don't like not being able to break somebody's legs if my money isn't worth it," Raymond simply stated, and though he did not agree with that logic, Christian couldn't argue with it.

Being a man in Raymond's position required of him being able to literally beat the money out of a person if necessary. Still, Christian could see that it could be easy money if they played their cards right, though he didn't know how he could convince Raymond that it was worth it.

"Eric had already tried to sell me the idea on many occasions. And on more than one, I would have made myself a lot of money if I had listened to him. But like I said, I like dealing with people directly," Raymond said, making Christian understand that it was a conversation that was not open to discussion, and so he acquiesced, feeling that this was a battle for another time.

He hung up, contemplating the idea of calling Ana to see how she was holding up. He knew that she was really close to her grandparents and that she must be devastated by the death that struck her grandfather, but he didn't really know how to deal with grieving people. To be honest, he was more used in creating reasons to grieve, than helping the pain to go away.

With a shake of his head, he put down his phone, waiting for it to ring for he was waiting for Luke, and he got back to reading the paper, focussing on the news section as he petted Bastille. It occurred to him that Ana was right on this issue. He never really thought of himself as a lonely person when he alone, and never felt the need to be with another being, but now that Bastille was there, he knew he would feel lonely without him.

There was a night when the cat wasn't there when Christian got home, and as long as he was missing, Christian couldn't go to sleep. He even considered definitely closing the windows so the cat couldn't escape (since he left them open for the feline to explore), but it felt wrong to him to imprison the kitten just to reassure himself. Bastille came back, and Christian just had to believe that he would always come back.

He was lost in his thoughts, his brain half focused on what he was reading, when he heard a noise at his door. Silently, he put the cat down and reached for his gun, waiting for the intruder to come into his flat and knowing that he would see them immediately given the fact that he was living in an open space. When the door opened, he aimed his gun, but quickly discarded it on his coffee table when he saw that it was Ana.

He went to her and took her his arms. "What are you doing here?"

"I didn't want to sleep alone tonight," She tells him with a small voice, before bursting into tears.

Christian held her in his arms, letting her out her sorrow and not saying a single word. She cried there for the longest time, whilst Christian rubbed her back with comfort, not sure of what he could tell her. Loss wasn't something that he ever experienced, because he didn't have much people in his life, even less people that had died. He couldn't relate to her, and only be there to listen and do his best to take the sorrow away.

When Ana's cries turned into sob, Christian directed them to his sofa, and he sat her there before making her some infusion. When he went back to her, Bastille was cuddled up on her laps, purring as she was petting him. Christian Gave her the mug that she absentmindedly took, and he sat next to her. She rested her head on his shoulder, and Christian caressed her arm as he told her,

"I have to work, tonight. I will come back as soon as possible, but I can't postpone it."

"It's okay. I showed up unannounced."

"I would cancel it if I could, and stay here with you.'

"I know you would," She assured him with a reassuring tone.

Christian glanced at her with her puffy red eyes and puffy red nose. He tried to think of something to say other than the usual and useless words people usually said in those situations, but she sadly smiled and curled up so her head could be on his laps as she let him know,

"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted to be with you tonight. I didn't come for empty words, but … I don't know why I came."

Christian leaned down and kissed her cheek. "You can come whenever you want. If you need comfort, I am here for you."

Another sad smile formed on her lips, and for a moment, they remained like that, in a peaceful silence that was only broken by Christian's phone buzzing and indicating him that Luke was waiting for him downstairs. Christian got up and kissed Ana as he promised her, "I'll be back as soon as possible. This isn't supposed to take long, anyway."

She nodded, and after a final kiss, Christian left his apartment and joined Luke in his car.

"You okay, man?" Luke asked, seeing that Christian was preoccupied, and Christian dismissed the man, telling him to drive. He didn't like the idea of leaving Ana like that, when she obviously wanted him by her side at this moment.

But it wasn't like he had a choice. Luke had noted a disturbance amongst some dealers that were working for Idris, and was sure that it was the pattern of a mutiny as he would call it. And when he exposed his worries to Christian, Christian had to admit that Luke's thoughts were making sense, so he decided to kill whatever coup those dealers were thinking off, in the bud.

If he had followed his guts, he wouldn't have taken Luke with his for this mission, but Ryan, because Luke wasn't a man of the field. But it was him who found out about this uprising, and it only seemed fitting that it would be him to help calm down the situation. Plus, Luke wanted to be more involved on the field, and Raymond had told Christian to grant him this wish.

So whilst Ana was in Orlando, Christian had taken Luke with him when he followed Patrick Hyde to show him how it was done in real life, rather than on a computer. And he had to say that Luke seemed to have a natural talent for it. Even though the test subject wasn't that hard to follow. It turned out, that for once, Christian's instincts weren't his best allies. The only crime Patrick Hyde was really guilty of, was having two wives.

His second wife was a really well conceded affair, in the state of Washington, and Christian highly doubted that either woman was aware of the existence of the other one. He even doubted that Hyde's children knew about his double life. But on a business point-of-view, Hyde had done nothing wrong. Well, nothing more than any other business man, which meant that he was always doing his best to pocket a maximum amount of money, with a minimum amount of investment.

When they arrived at the meeting place, Christian was surprised to see more people than he expected. Usually, when drug dealers and gang leaders wanted to talk seriously, they didn't bring their whole squad. But it seemed that it had been the case. Luke was about to get out of the car, when Christian stopped him and asked,

"Are you sure that we are not expected?"

"Yes. No one knows who I work for," Luke confidently assured, already opening up his door. Christian prevented him from doing so, his eyes steady on the crowd where a few pair of eyes were already on them..

"Somebody figured it out. This isn't a meeting to talk. This is a setup," Christian warned, but Luke didn't take him seriously.

"Stop being so paranoid, Christian. Everything is going to be ok—" He was interrupted as he exited the car, a bullet finding place in his chest.

Christian swore, manoeuvring himself inside the car so he could take the driver's place as other shots were fired in his direction, and he pulled Luke back into the car, all the while driving backward, away from the fire guns. After a short turn, he put properly the wounded man on the passenger seat, urging him to keep his eyes open and to press down on the wound, and he drove to the nearest hospital, ignoring the lights and the other angry drivers.

Several times, he saw Luke blink his way to oblivion, making him yell for him to stay awake. As they were nearing the hospital, Christian called the ER, pretending to be a cop so the medical team would be ready for when they would arrive. He kept on repeating Luke to hold on, but when he pulled over at the hospital, he could see that Luke was closing his eyes, which was never a good sign

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

For the longest time, Christian stayed in the car in the parking of his building, staring into nothing and only thinking of what he would do the next day. After what seemed to Christian to last forever, the doctor had come out of the room and told Christian that Luke had stabilised and that he was out of danger. But that didn't stop Christian from ruminating from the inside. It wasn't only Luke that had been shot, but the whole institution that was Idris, and he was very well determined to get to the bottom of it.

With a loud heave, he left the car and took the stairs to his apartment, knowing that there was less chance for him to meet anyone that way. He was hoping that Ana was already sleeping, because he didn't want her to see him all bloodied and worry over nothing, and his wish was granted. She was fast asleep on the sofa, Bastille cuddled up against her and lazily opening his eyes when Christian closed the front door.

Silently, he went upstairs and took a cold shower, washing the blood away whilst he kept on thinking of what had happened that night. He should have followed his instincts and asked Ryan to come along. And he should have told Luke to turn away as soon as he saw the crowd. He didn't like feeling like he could have handled a situation better, and didn't follow his instincts, and he liked even less that another person had to suffer the consequences.

Once out of the shower, he checked his phone to call Raymond, but when he saw the late hour, he simply decided to text him to let him know of what happened, ending the message by saying that he would call him in the morning. Then, he went to pick up Ana and put her in his bed. For a few minutes, he simply looked at her, trying not to think of the possibility that it could have been him in Luke's shoes and he was the one now laying in a hospital bed.

He lied next to the brunette, trying to find sleep, but when it became obvious to him that this was going to be a sleepless night for him, he got up and went in the room where he kept the things he would share with his future children. There, he took the guitar and mindlessly played, trying to ease his mind and bite his bone.

He was very well aware of why he couldn't find sleep, but that did not mean that it wasn't eating him still. Christian had always flattered himself to be a man with a code, and at this right moment, he was going against his code. Someone shooting one of his colleague meant that he would seek revenge the very next second, and he was delaying that revenge for two reasons. The first one was that he was waiting to see if Luke would wake up and if he wouldn't have any sequels. The second was Ana. He had promised her that he would be home for her, and no matter how much he valued his code, he valued more the worth of his word to her.

And this was the scary part. What if one day he was in a moral dilemma where he would have to choose between those two important parts of his life? A few months ago, he knew very well what he would have done. But now that Ana was becoming more and more important to him, and in his life, he wasn't so sure of his choice.

As he kept on trying to see clearly through his mind, Christian started playing _Tears In Heaven_ by Eric Clapton, humming the lyrics along the way. He was so lost in his thoughts that he barely heard the door being opened, and rather felt Ana looking at him. He immediately stopped playing, but she shook her head and came to sit at the feet of the rocking chair he was in,

"Don't. I love that song."

Christian smiled and resumed playing the song, feeling a warmth take over his heart when she smiled back, even though he could see nostalgia in her eyes. When the song was over, Christian put the guitar aside and Ana climbed on his laps, curling in a ball as if she were a cat.

"My very first concert was a Eric Clapton one. I went with Mike and my grandfather because he was a huge fan of his music, and… I guessed he passed it on to me."

"Sorry," Christian said, not meaning to bring back sad memories to the girl in his arms. She shook her head, and looked up to him as she told him,

"No. As I said, I love this song. And I like your voice when you sing it."

They remained silent for a few moments, looking at one another, when Ana asked, "How was your night."

Christian hesitated for a second, not sure of what to do. He knew Raymond's policy concerning telling his daughter about the kind of criminal activities he had, but he also didn't want to lie to her. So he took the grey area that was offered to him, "It was… _eventful_."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'd rather not. Maybe some other time," He truthfully said, because he was still angered by what happened, and he didn't want to let this anger out on Ana. "How about I get you back to bed?" He proposed, taking her up in his arms and taking her back to his room, bridal style.

Once they were both tucked under the cover, Ana cuddled against Christian and he mindlessly caressed her arm, waiting for her to go back to sleep as he numbingly stared at the ceiling. He thought that she had gone back to dreamland when she asked with a small voice,

"Can I ask you something without you getting all defensive?"

"Sure."

"And you will answer honestly?"

"I always do."

"You won't try to elude me?" She insisted, which made Christian frown. He was rather curious about what she could want to know so badly, but he also knew that sometimes not knowing something was better than the raw and ugly reality.

"Are you sure you want the answer to your question?" He countered, giving her an escape before she could ask anything she might regret. But she didn't even think twice about it, and confidently admitted,

"Yes."

"Ask away, then."

"Is Mia a hooker?"

This had the merit to stop Christian in his soothing circle, tilting his head down so he could look at Ana. She was looking at him, waiting for him to give her an answer, but all he could think about was how Ana who knew nothing of the blonde girl could have come up with that conclusion.

Ana sighed a little, looking down as she explained, "When we were in Orlando, Elena told Kate and I that… she wasn't much the housewife we thought she was. She explained a few things about her past, and what she does now, and… well, it would make sense to me… I mean, it would explain why we saw the tree of you together the other time..."

For a long time, Christian looked at the blue eyes of the girl in his bed, trying to see beforehand where this conversation could lead, and where it was coming from. Mia had shared a few bits of how and why Elena had started to help young girls, and even though she didn't go into much details, Christian had connected the dots. Still, he didn't know exactly what Elena had told Ana, and what Ana had concluded of what she heard.

Still, he had made a promise, and so told Ana, weighing on the past tense of his sentence, "Mia _was_ a working girl. Now, she is a law student."

He watched Ana hang her head low, and wondered what she could possibly be thinking, though he didn't have to wonder for long.

"I feel so bad, now."

"Why?"

She hesitated, before looking back up, remorse in her eyes, "Because I was jealous, and you were just helping someone in need."

That answer gave Christian many options to keep the conversation up float, but of all the outcome, he decided to go toward the most selfish one.

"You were jealous?" He teased with a small grin. Ana furrowed her brows, pouting and unknowingly giving Christian the urge to kiss her.

"It's not funny," She complained, slapping his chest, and he couldn't help but laugh a little, making them turn so she would be the one laying on her bed. Then, he looked deep into her eyes, tenderly caressing her face as he assured her,

"You have no reason to be. I am not seeing anyone else but you. I only have eyes for you."

He was rewarded with an honest smile that he quickly hid away with his lips.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So I know this chapter might seem filler, but it was important for a couple of reasons that I will linger on later on. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Luke****?**

**💚What do you think of Christian's and Ana's conversation about Mia?**

**💚 What did you think of the song and the sweet moment that came from it?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚** What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR GUEST REVIEWERS**‼️

**Guest1: **_Well, Eric is ... Eric. He did what he did with no regrets, that's all I can tell so far... but I'm glad you liked the Elena story_

**Guest2: **_Yes, Elena did not have an easy childhood, but she managed to make a life for herself. Hope you liked this chapter just the same._

**Guest3: **_I know you're waiting for that other update, but it is a bit hard to write it, I'll explain why in the next update, but I think it will be by the end of the year ... _

**Guest4: **_I'm so happy that I managed to make you like a character that you usually dislike, hehe_

**Guest5: **_Don't worry, we're back to Christian's pov, next chapter. Those outside of Christian are just necessary for the plot._

**Guest6: **_Yup, Ray was not kidding around. He was scary from youth, haha. But I wanted to show as well that, though he rectified the situation, Eric was more the brain when they started_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	24. Chapter 23: Night Out

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 23: Night Out ****(3,0K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**So you need to hear the song to see have a full experience of the chapter. Do it, it will make better, trust me. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Cellblock Tango - Chicago**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ryan's PoV**

When Ryan entered the bar where Luke had proposed to meet, he was more than sceptic. It seemed to be a little bit more classy than he expected. He had hoped for a night of drinking with Christian and Luke (well, mostly with Luke), celebrating Luke's recovery, and it seemed that binge drinking wasn't something he would be able to do in this bar.

Still, it was Luke's night, and he said that he liked this place, so Ryan kept for himself any ill feeling he had for the place, and went to sit by the bar, where Luke and Christian were already sitting, with drinks in front of them.

"Gee, I thought you were going to ditch on us and leave me alone with him," Luke complained once Ryan was seated. The blue eyed man snickered, glancing over Christian before he ordered a pint of beer and assured his other friend,

"I would never leave you alone with that stick in the mud when _fun_ is supposed to be at the party. I want you to actually enjoy yourself, Luke, and we both know that Christian doesn't know the meaning of the word."

As Ryan expected it, Luke laughed with him, whilst Christian ignored the both of them, drinking whatever fruit juice he had ordered.

Ryan had to admit that Christian's mood had been more sullen than usual ever since Luke had been shot. Whilst Luke was in the hospital, loosing a lung and learning to live for the rest of his life with only one, Ryan had learnt how ruthless Christian could get. Over the years, he had seen Christian take drastic measures with some people, but never to this point.

The day that followed the shooting, Christian had asked Raymond for carte blanche, and to nobody's surprise, he had been granted it. The very same night, Christian had tracked down the man who had shot Luke, and cut his index finger so he could never shoot again. Then, he had tracked every dealer and gang leader that had been present that night, and all replaced them one by one.

Ryan had followed Christian in his thirst for justice, and what had frightened him most wasn't the way the cruel demeanour he treated people, but more the way that he didn't seem affected the least in the world by what he was doing. Whether it was torturing someone for information, or watching someone beg for a second chance, Christian's cold attitude never wavered.

And though he never thought before that he would betray his friend, those past couple of weeks taught Ryan one thing, he would do anything to never be on Christian's bad side. He could actually see why Raymond placed such high hopes in the man. Christian never tried to put his interests first, and Ryan actually doubted that Christian ever tried to enrich himself more than what Raymond was paying him.

Ryan glanced at the drink in Luke's hands, surprised not to see a beer since it was Luke's drink of predilection, and when his friend caught his gaze, he smiled and explained, "The cocktails here are the bomb. I never drink a single beer when I'm here."

Ryan nodded, but did not change his order nonetheless, knowing that with his convalescence, Luke wouldn't be able to drink much, and Ryan would probably end up drinking the most out of the two. He actually felt bad for his friend, because he never really thought of losing a major organ. Sure the doctors told Luke that he could live just fine on one lung, as long as he didn't do any Olympics or marathon, and he steered clear from cigarettes and other lung hazard substances. But still, it felt to Luke that living on one lung suddenly made life more dangerous.

He actually didn't blame his friend when he announced that he wanted to stay in the comfort of what he had been doing so far, meaning keeping up with security from his office. Christian on the other hand was not that pleased with that decision. Though Ryan did not tell anything to either Luke or Christian, he had overheard Christian talking Raymond into giving more responsibilities to Luke.

"Here's your drink, sir," The barmaid said, putting in front of Ryan his pint of beer on a coaster.

For a second, Ryan froze, before his natural flirtatious ways came back, kicking in. He had never been shy around girls, and he knew that he was very capable of charming a girl into his bed, very well aware that his looks helped him a great deal. After all, mixed people with clear blue eyes were a big turn on for girls.

The barmaid was of mixed race as well, her natural curls hidden in a bun, though a few strands escaped the elastic band. She had big eyes, black as the night highlighted by long lashes, and plump lips painted with red lipstick.

He flashed her a bright smile, revealing his pearly whites, as he flirted, "If I had known that you were the barmaid, I would have asked for something more complicated."

The barmaid rose her well defined eyebrows at him, a mocking smile spreading her beautiful lips, and she asked, "And why that?"

"So I would have to see you longer than just pouring me a beer. It takes time to make a complicated drink."

The girl suppressed a snicker, and leaned on the counter so her face was inches from Ryan's, "You're playing _way_ out of your league, big boy. I don't play with nice boys."

"Who says I'm a nice boy? You have no idea how _naughty_ I can get," He retorted, leaning even closer to her.

She straightened up a bit, looking at him up and down with a small smirk on her face, before she informed him, "Anyone hanging around Luke can only be a nice boys. Especially when they're wearing suits on a Saturday night."

With that, she glanced at Christian, before swaying to the other side of the counter. And though Ryan cursed his friends for killing his vibe, he confidently told them, "Gentlemen, I'm not going home alone tonight."

Luke snickered, remind Ryan, "She just blew you off."

"Because I hang out with you! Dude! Why does she think _you_ are a good boy? I mean, I know better."

Luke grinned, sipping on his drink. "Because nice boys are not thrown out in the middle of the night. They even get call back in the morning."

This made Christian sneer alongside with Ryan. "Remind me when is the last time you got laid?" He asked with sarcasm.

Both Ryan and Christian knew that it had been a long time since Luke had been with anyone, so his argument seemed void of sense. That did not stop Luke to point out another obvious truth,

"You wanna talk? I could practically call you a monk! It's been what? A year, at least?"

"Didn't I tell you? I plan on becoming a monk," Christian quipped, which made both Ryan and Luke laugh out loud. If there were two things that everyone knew about Christian, it was his loyalty to their boss, and his desire to have a family. Leaving the life of a monk did not suit with any of those.

Still, Ryan narrowed his eyes at the coppered hair man, and told him with an accusatory tone, "I have heard rumours about you and that girl who moved in your building. People have been seeing you with her."

Christian smirked, and purposely batted his lashes at Ryan as he said with a sweet and girly tone, "People have been seeing you with me. Do you have something to tell me?"

Ryan grimaced, whilst Luke laughed next to him. The idea of being intimate with Christian was unsettling, and even frightening. He wasn't a voyeur, far from it, but he had seen Christian out of the shower a couple of times, and his towel seem to promise more pain than fun. In truth, Ryan had tried to play for the other team in his youth, but he liked the touch of a woman too much. He liked the curves that he would never find in a man and what he liked most was to fall asleep with one of them in his hand.

The barmaid passed in front of them once again, preparing a cocktail, and Ryan hailed her, "You didn't give me your name, you know."

"Because guys like you don't need to know my name."

"My name's Ryan. Just so you know what to scream, when I'll pound into you tonight," He told her with a smirk, which she returned, thinking a bit about it, before she let him know,

"The name is Suzie."

She left to take care of other customers, Ryan having a big grin on his face "Like I said, I won't be going home alone tonight."

He saw Christian roll his eyes and tapped his shoulder, "Come on Christian. Abstinence can be hard. I'm sure one of the girls in this place is going to _love_ helping you with the release."

"I am very fine with the way it is, now. Worry about your night, instead of mine," Christian said, clearly not interested in finding someone for the night.

Ryan didn't insist much knowing how stubborn Christian could get, and the three men watched as people came up an improvised stage, and sang famous songs. According to Luke, it was karaoke night, and it was pretty popular. But Ryan did not pay much attention to what was happening on stage, and was more interested on what was happening behind the counter. He flirted with Suzie, happy to see that she came Into his game.

It was a few drinks later, and several butchered songs later that things turned south. Christian was working though his phone, like most of the times they would go out (it seemed that he did not know how to disconnect), and Ryan was getting worked up just by talking to Suzie, when Luke nudged him in the ribs, and pressed him to look at the stage.

Ana and her best friend were there, all smiles and ready to sing a song from a musical. Ryan glanced at Christian, wondering if he could make him leave without him noticing the brunette. If he were honest with himself, Ryan had always thought that Raymond was overprotective over his daughter. _Way_ too overprotective. The girl didn't even have the possibility to be out with her best friend alone. So if it were only up to him, he would pretend like he didn't see the girl in the bar, with only the company of her friend. And he knew that Luke thought like him.

But Christian was another story … Christian was loyal to Raymond, and to Raymond only. If he saw the young brunette somewhere she wasn't supposed to be, Ryan knew that Christian would report it to her father.

But unfortunately, it seemed to have been the moment when Christian looked up his phone and glanced at the stage, seeing Ana and her friend there. He did not show any emotions, which was a constant with Christian, and simply kept his eyes on the stage for a few other seconds, before scanning the rest of the bar.

"Where is Jose?" Luke asked, probably hoping that Christian would simply assume that his best friend was in the area, just unseen. But Christian cut off the hope,

"Off." He did not add another word, his eyes going back to the stage where Ana and her friend both had a mike in hand and were barely looking at the screen displaying the lyrics for _Chicago's Cell Block Tango_. Katherine took the first verse, getting down the stage as she did so, and dancing between other customers of the bar.

_You know how people have these little habits that get you down_

_Like Bernie_

_Bernie you like to chew gum_

_No, not chew, pop_

_So I came home this one day_

_And I'm really irritated_

_I'm looking for a little bit o' sympathy_

_And there's Bernie lyin' on the couch, drinkin' a beer and chewin'. _

_No, not chewin'_

_Poppin'. So, I said to him, I said "You pop that Gum one more time"_

_And he did_

_So I took the shotgun off the wall_

_And I fired two warning shots_

_Into his head_

She made the gun gesture as she sang the last words, and the two girls sang the chorus together, with Ana helping her friend back on the stage before she herself got down. Ryan glanced at Christian, wondering if the man would intervene, but Christian only seemed to look at the show with a bored eye.

_I met Ezekiel Young from Salt Lake city about two years ago_

(She caressed a random's dude head)

_And he told me he was single_

_And we hit it off right away_

(She sat on his laps, smiling)

_So, we started living together_

_He'd go to work, he'd come home_

_I'd fix him a drink, we'd have dinner_

(She played with his glass of whiskey)

_And then I found out,_

_"Single" he told me_

_Single, my ass _

_(She yanked the guy's head by his hair)_

_Not only was he married_

_Oh, no, he had six wives_

_One of those Mormons, you know _

_(She shrugged)_

_So that night when he came home from work, _

_I fixed him his drink as usual _

_(_She drank from the guy's drink, bottoms up)

_You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic_

As she said those words, she got up with a smirk before singing the chorus with her friend. They sang the rest of the song switching places between verse, and dancing like in the musical during the choruses. They were both really invested in the song, and when it was over, many people applauded and whistled their way, making them beam with excitement.

They went back to sit at their table, rather far from the bar, and Ryan couldn't help but feel bad for the brunette. Twice she had gone abroad, and had the possibility to have the fun of her life, but she had been stuck with Christian. He probably had her back and locked in her room by 8pm. He was sure that she would have enjoyed herself more, even if it had been several people looking after her, than if it were just Christian.

"Well, those are ladies you don't want to piss," Luke uttered with a small smile, and Ryan couldn't agree more. If one of their favourite song was a song about women killing their husbands for popping gum, it sure would be best to be on their good side. Especially knowing that if Ana were to ever kill someone, Ryan was sure that Raymond would cover for her, and that nobody would ever find out.

"I think I should go," Christian said, and both Ryan and Luke whined.

"Dude, the night is still young! Just pretend you didn't see nothing, and enjoy the rest of the night with us."

Christian rose an eyebrow at Ryan, a small smirk playing on his lips. "The sooner I leave, the more you can flirt with Miss Great Smile over there."

Ryan didn't have the time to respond anything, that Ana appeared next to Luke, alongside her friend. Everyone looked at each other, before Katherine broke the silence, and said, "Are you guys following us? Because if that's so, you shouldn't be drinking on the job."

"Does your fiancé know that you're planning to kill him if he pops gum?" Ryan shot back, making Ana laugh before she ordered drinks for her friend and her as she retorted,

"Elliott is perfection. He knows better than to get on Kate's nerves."

They waited for their drinks, and once they had them in hand, they looked at the group of men, and Ana's said, "So … we can keep this between us, right? No need to ruin everyone's night, including the people who aren't here."

Ryan knew that she was talking about her father, and asking them to keep to themselves her night out with her friend; but subconsciously, all eyes fell on Christian who was staring right back at Ana. For two seconds that seemed to last forever, the two of them looked at each other, before Christian got up his stool and announced,

"I need to make a phone call."

The two girls grimaced as he left the bar, and Ryan followed him to try and reason him. As soon as they were outside, he reasoned his friend, "It's just a girl's night, in the City. Who will be stupid enough to do something to Raymond's daughter in his won city?"

Christian turned to look at him, slightly confused, and so Ryan continued. "I know you're high on loyalty and all, but—"

"I'm calling Jose. As for what you were referring, as far as I know, Ana is at her friend's apartment. But maybe I will see something contradicting that when I will get back inside."

For a second, Ryan stared dumbfounded at his friend, not sure he understood properly the innuendo. But when Christian brought his phone to his ear, he went back inside, and told the girls, "Maybe you should disappear before he gets back."

Ana rolled her eyes, mumbling something under her breath that made her friend laugh, and the two girls left. When Christian came back, he did not mention the episode, and simply told the guys that he was leaving to meet with Jose, wishing Ryan good luck with the barmaid.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So this chapter was here to show how people perceive Christian from the outside because we always assume that he is expressing what he is feeling, and I wanted to show you that, it's not the case. Plus a couple of other things that will be important later on. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Ryan and his flirt with Suzie****?**

**💚What do you think of the relationship between the three men?**

**💚 What did you think of the girls singing?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but this chapter doesn't have any answers. I am rather tired, and I will be back to answering reviews for the next chapter. Also, I will try to put ten chapters out there by the end of the year, but that's just a try. And THANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	25. Chapter 24: In The Middle Of The Night

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 24: In The Middle Of The Night ****(7,9K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**So you have been waiting for so long for this particular chapter, and you should have a special thanks to FrenchBenzo who gave me the inspiration for it. I would like you to pay special attention to this chapter because many things are said without being said. As usual, but since you have a new point-of-view for this one, maybe it will make more sense. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**La Valse A Mille Temps - Jacques Brel**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana was laying in the lounge room, her eyes closed as she let the small breeze of the beginning of spring get in. If the days were that clement this early in March, she had no doubts that they would keep on getting better, until Kate would be able to celebrate her wedding, without having to worry about the rain.

The wind was pleasant, and she let a small smile of complaisance spread her lips whilst the music player played once again _La Valse A Mille Temps_. Ever since Christian had introduced her from that song of another generation, she had not been able to get it out of her head, especially when Christian was away and distant.

It had been a month since her clandestine night out with Kate, and she hadn't had the chance to see him even once since then. Sure, she knew that he was working a lot and that he must be under a lot of pressure but that didn't mean that it didn't bother her. Her father had been on the edge ever since Christian left, and she suspected that there was something that did not go according to plan.

For a moment, she even feared that Raymond had discovered the ruse and had done what he usually did, get between her and her boyfriends; but Christian still contacted her as if nothing. Granted that the texts he would send her were mostly initiated by her, and too often too short to have any real messaging conversation, but Ana trusted that if her father had known about their charade, Christian would have told her. At least, she liked to believe in that idea.

This was actually a conundrum that Ana often reflected on. Her relationship with Christian, and his relationship with her father. She knew how her father felt about Christian, there was no need to be a genius to understand that Christian was like a second son in Raymond's eyes. And Ana was sure that Christian felt the same for Raymond, if not more. The few times she saw them together, she had witnessed how loyal Christian was to his boss. And more than witnessing, she had heard the guys talking about how Christian would always do anything for Raymond Steele. It made her ponder more than once what would happen if she told Christian they should go official. And she was scared that Christian would choose his loyalty and disregard her like an old sock.

Still, at that given moment, it was nothing like that. She knew he was preoccupied with whatever he was doing, travelling throughout the country, and she wished that he would rely on her a bit more. She wasn't sure if she wanted the whole truth, but she knew that she didn't want the sugarcoats Christian had been given her when she asked about how he was doing, and how was work.

"Dinner will be ready in ten minutes, Miss Ana," Gail suddenly said from the threshold, startling Ana out of her thought. The brunette nodded her acknowledgement to the maid, closing her eyes as she decided that she would listen to the French song once more before going to the dining room.

As Jacques Brel sang about love in Paris, Ana thought back of her time there, and what had come out of it. The charity that she had envisioned was coming to life, though it was later than she had hoped. She was actually very surprised by how her father had given her free rein over it, not trying for one single moment to tell her what she should do or not.

Ethan had advised her to take someone who knew how to deal with charity and make sure to trust that person because a lot of money would go through them. So Ana had hired a girl named Jessica, fresh out of college who had spent most of her youth doing charities. She seemed to understand exactly what Ana wanted to do and appeared to be invested enough into philanthropy.

Raymond had given to Ana the keys to a building that she had transformed into a shelter for the homeless. And Jessica had convinced Ana that sheltering the people in need wasn't enough. That she needed to help them get back their dignity. Which in this society meant helping them get a job and provide for themselves, without depending on the goodwill of anyone. So, on the two first floor of that building, Jessica and Ana had installed a whole health care system, as well as a barbershop.

Surprisingly, Jessica had found both doctors and barbers who would come to work, out of the goodness of their heart, without asking anything in return. Now all they needed to figure out was how to dress the people who came to them for help.

Ana was still lost in her thoughts, when a hand rested on her shoulder, making her jump a little. "Dinner's ready, sweetheart," Raymond said with gentleness.

Ana fondly smiled to her father before getting up and following him to the dining room where Gail had already put their dinner on the table. She saw that Gail had cooked one her father's favourite food, Lebanese food. The two Steeles sat at the dinner table, Raymond going straight for the falafels as he inquired,

"How was your day?"

"Rather dull, really. Though Kate is starting to lose her head. She lost her caterer for her wedding."

"How come? Who was he? I'm going to have a word with him!" Raymond exclaimed with anger. Ana shrugged, expecting this reaction from her father, but she explained something simple to him,

"It was Mr Martin. And he died in a car accident. So I think he has a fairly good excuse."

Raymond nodded with a small smile, implicitly admitting that he overreacted too quickly. They kept on eating, Ana relishing on how good Gail was with food, and Raymond suddenly told his daughter out of nowhere,

"I didn't know you liked old French music."

"Huh?"

"The song you were listening to when I came in," He clarified, and unconsciously, she touched the necklace that Christian had given her for Christmas.

Her father wasn't looking at her, focused on serving himself with another portion of tabouli, and Ana shrugged, using Christian's best tactic: elusion.

"I stumbled upon it not long ago, and it stuck in my head." She certainly wasn't not going to tell her father that this particular song made her think of a certain man and gave her a sensation of peace.

Raymond made a small approving noise with his throat, but Ana didn't think much of it. She knew that her father wasn't really talkative when Lebanese food was involved. He liked to eat first, and then talk. Which was why she was keeping her request for desert, hoping that the good food would have put him on a good mood.

They kept on eating, Ana commenting on a few things such as her charity and her best friends' wedding and having her father give her his full attention, even though his responses were not fully developed.

Gail came to take away the dish and serve dessert, which was to Ana's greatest pleasure raspberry tiramisu. "So … I have been meaning to ask you something," She said, though she kept her eyes down when she felt her father's gaze on her.

"I'm all ears."

"I'd like to move out," She blurted, looking up.

Her father choked on his dessert, before staring at her with shock. His face was void of colours, and for a second, Ana almost tried to pass it as a joke. But she wanted freedom, and she knew that staying with her overprotective father would never give her that.

"Why?" He asked in a blank whisper, making Ana look down because she could see the hurt on his face, and she couldn't bear it.

"I … want to be able to come and go as I please without having people following me around. I want to have a night out without having to make a statement beforehand. I … I want freedom."

"But you are free, Ana. I'd never stop you from—"

"I'm not! I have a guy following me even when I am just paying a visit to Anne down the block. It isn't fun to have to depend on people to do anything, Dad. I don't like it anymore. In fact, I've never liked it."

There was a heavy silence between the two of them, during which Ana looked down at her dessert. This was an idea that had been hanging in a corner of her head for quite some time. Ever since Kate moved out of her parents, to be honest. But it was mostly her new relationship with Christian that helped her get the courage to ask her father.

She didn't like that she had to lie to him every time she would go see Christian because she had always been truthful to her father, and she knew it was the same for him. It was actually why she had always been careful not to ask certain questions about certain aspects of his life. The only times he blew her off was when she asked about her mother, but she had learnt to live with it and accepted the fact that her father would never share with her anything concerning his late wife. At least, she liked to believe that she was dealing with it.

"Ana, sweetheart … I can't grant you that wish," Raymond finally said, his voice still a low whisper. Ana snapped her head up, shocked that her father would refuse her. She had thought that it would be a painful topic, but that he would give her what she wanted, probably giving her an apartment in Kate's building, and posting people to follow her without her knowing.

"I _can't_," He repeated, contrite. "And this is only selfish of me, but if you leave, I would be too lonely. I'm not ready for you not to be around me."

Ana didn't argue anything, hanging her head low as she realised that she never thought of what moving out could mean to her father. She always thought of the freedom it would give her, never of the fact that it would leave her father alone in this huge mansion.

The two of them remained silent for a moment before Raymond asked, "Aren't you happy?"

"Of course, I am."

"Then, why do you want to leave, then?"

"I told you why. I don't want people following me around, and knowing my every move. I want to go out with whomever I want, without having to tell you first. I want to … live a more normal life than this one."

On those words, Ana got up and kissed her father on his cheek, "But I don't want you to be unhappy either. So I won't go anywhere, forget about it."

She left to go to the library where she pulled a book and read to evacuate her mind. She was upset that the conversation didn't go as she had expected, but she was even more upset that she caused hurt to her father. She rarely tried to see things his way, because she was sure this was something she would never be able to do. The two of them were too different in every way for her to fully understand how her father thought. But that didn't mean she couldn't see when he was emotionally in pain. And this evening was one of those times.

She heard footsteps behind her, making her snap her head and see that Raymond was staring at her from the threshold. She gave him a small smile, and patted the space next to her for him to come by her side. Once there, she leant her head against his shoulder, appreciating this small moment. It was pretty rare that Raymond ever came to that room, though Ana suspected it was because he was missing his friend. Eric had helped her fill this library with wonders, always bringing her new stories to read, and even, when she started learning new languages, bringing them in their original tongues.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," Raymond said.

"For what?"

"It feels to me that you are not as happy as I'd like you to be."

"I'm plenty of happy, Daddy," She assured him, giving him a reassuring smile. Raymond shook his head, sighing.

"No, or we wouldn't have had this conversation. And if you want to move out, I will help you move out."

"I told you, forget I said anything. I'm happy just right here."

Raymond looked at her, caressing her cheek with love as his eyes ravaged her face, searching for something before he told her, "You've always been such a poor liar, Ana."

She grimaced, ready to quip about it, when her father interrupted her, "How about I … _try_, and I emphasise on the _try_, to be a little bit less on your back."

"Really? No more useless bodyguards? No more drivers?" She asked with a bright smile that instantly contaminated Raymond, though he calmed her hopes,

"How about we go slowly? You still get a driver, and you still get bodyguards. But, not upclose. You won't even know they are here."

Ana thought about it for a second, before accepting, knowing that she would not get something better for the moment. Though she still had a huge bargaining chip, "And what about me going out as I please?"

"You can already go as you please?"

"Yeah, but then your guys tell you where I went, and when I come home, there is this whole Spanish Inquisition."

It was Raymond's turn to think about it, before he proposed, "Then I will tell them to not tell me anything, unless it endangers you. If I don't know, I can't question."

Ana beamed and jumped in her father's arms, "You're the best Dad _ever_."

"Anything for you, sweetheart," He replied, giving her back her embrace.

Ana got up with a big smile, and when she did so, she accidentally knocked the frame that was on the little table by the side of the sofa. She caught it before it touched the ground, her smile fading when she looked at the picture of her godfather, and before she could try to stop herself, she was asking,

"Dad, do you know who killed Uncle Eric?"

It was a question that she had always avoided. She had always known that Eric had been murdered, but she never asked her father about it. Mostly because she had heard people talking at the funerals, and that she didn't want to know if those rumours were true. And when she had asked Christian, she didn't like the answer he gave her. She was sure that, if she had asked further, he would have told her; but she liked better the version Christian gave her, even though it still left her curious.

Raymond longly looked at her, probably assessing if if he should be truthful, or try to dismiss the conversation, like every time she would bring the topic of her mother. But after a long sigh, he admitted, his eyes never wavering, "I do. But I don't think you would like to know, or that you need to know, for that matter."

She looked down, putting the frame at its proper place before she said, "Uncle Eric didn't deserve to die like that. He was a good man, and good people die of old age."

Not for one second she doubted the fact that if Christian was guilty of ending her godfather's life, it had been because he had been asked to. And she couldn't understand why her father would want to kill his best friend, the man who had been with him ever since they were toddlers, and who had helped him be who he is.

Raymond heaved as he got up, and rested a sympathetic hand on his daughter's shoulder. "Not everything is black or white in this world. The shades of grey are infinite, but I can assure you that Eric's death was for the best."

"I am pretty sure that he would disagree."

Raymond repressed a smile before kissing Ana's forehead with love as he told her, "It was what was best for everyone. Including Eric. No matter how it might look to you."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

She was peacefully sleeping in her bed when Ana thought she heard a noise. So she stirred a little, her brain still asleep whilst the chicken side of her was hoping it wasn't a monster from another dimension. She knew she shouldn't have watched a horror movie just before bed. Especially a Japanese one where demons were involved. But what was awaiting for her was far from being a monster.

She saw, standing on the right side of her bed, Christian, dressed with a winter coat.

Her eyes widely open as a smile crept on her face, and she murmured his name, thinking that maybe it was just a dream. After all, last she had heard of him was two days ago, and he was in Vegas. Christian turned his head to her, making Ana look where his gaze was first focused on, and there she saw on her nightstand that Christian had put a golden rose there.

She sat up, taking the metal flower in her hands and looking at Christian with a question hanging on her lips. But he answered in a whisper before she could ask anything, "I remember you saying that roses were your favourite flowers."

She smiled and patted the empty space in front of her. Christian sat there, and she switched on her bedside lamp to see him better. He seemed tired. She knew that Christian wasn't much of a sleeper, but it never showed on his face, whereas she could now see bags under his eyes. His face that he usually kept shaven was covered with a thin layer of beard, and she couldn't help but reach to touch it, loving the tingle beneath her palm.

Christian leaned in her touch, closing his eyes and inhaling deeply before he bluntly reached for her and kissed her passionately on the lips. She was not going to lie, she _loved_ Christian's kisses. She loved the way he could take her breath away just by kissing her. The way he held her as if she was the most fragile thing in the world, but with a grip firm enough to not let her fall. She loved how her stomach would happily flip when his breath mixed with hers.

Broadly speaking, she loved the physical interactions she had with Christian. He was a very passionate and dedicated lover who always made sure to leave her satisfied. She never had to fake anything with Christian because, in addition to listening to her body, he listened to her as well. Whether she wanted a quickie or a longie, he was up for the task, and eager to deliver. And she liked that side of him very much.

"I missed you," Christian told her when he broke their kiss, and all Ana could do was lazily smile at him. "And I'm sorry I haven't been much in touch," He added, caressing her face tenderly.

"Hence the rose?"

"Hence the rose," He admitted, and all Ana could focus on was the fact that he came to see her first. He just came back from whatever mission he had been sent to, and before even getting some sleep, or shaving, he came to see her.

"I'm happy to see you," She confessed, making him smile with that smile that she loved so much because she knew that she was the only one who ever got to see it.

With gentleness, she leant forward to kiss him again, and when he brought his hand to her face, something broke inside of her. Silently, she extirpated herself from under her covers, and straddled his laps, holding on to him like a drowning man to dear life. With urgency, she passed her hands beneath his coat, and helped him out of it, grinding against his monster cock growing bigger by the minute.

Once the coat was disregarded on the floor, Ana's fingers started working on Christian's buttons; but he stopped her before she could undo all of them and broke their kiss. They looked at one another for a moment, before Christian attacked her neck, taking her in his arms so he could lay her properly in her bed.

His fingers slowly made their way to her legs, meeting sating shorts along the way, and making her moan when his hand made its way underneath them. Christian stopped moving all at once, looking at Ana with a small smirk, and she knew that he was enjoying her having to be silent, more than he should. She upped her head to kiss him again, but he moved further, tickling just slightly her folds in the process. She moaned again, and he stopped once more.

"_Christian_. _Please_. I'll be a good girl."

"If you make a sound, I will stop," He darkly warned and she bit her lip.

They both knew that, given the configuration of the house, she could make noises, and her father would never hear them, as long as she wasn't screaming bloody murder. But there was something erotic about having to keep quiet, and Christian seemed to have picked up on that.

Slowly, his tongue travelled to her nipples before his mouth engulfed one of them. She sucked in a deep breath, repressing a moan and arching so Christian would keep on doing whatever he was doing to her body. Whilst his mouth was busy with her breast, his fingers pushed to the side her panty and played with her clitoris, but when he slightly pinched it, she couldn't help the strangled sound that came out of her.

Christian stopped, looking at her with a smirk, as he threatened, "If you keep on making such noises, I will have to gag you."

"Maybe you should," She challenged with the same husky tone, and all she earned from him was an eyebrow up whilst his grin grew even wider.

"If I am to gag you, I won't stop at that," He darkly whispered in her ear, making her shiver with desire.

Though Christian was rather traditional in bed, he had been willing to try for her a few times to tie her up to the bed. And though it wasn't something that she would want to do daily, Ana had to admit that she loved the dominant side of him that it brought out of him. Having her at his mercy even made him more talkative and definitely more rough, and she wouldn't mind the least in the world if they had a go at it, which was why she panted,

"Then maybe you should …"

Christian seemed to think about it for a second, his eyes lost into her own, but then he shook his head, plunging a finger in her wet folds as he informed her, "I'd rather keep that for when I will make you scream my name. For now, I will watch you bite your tongue."

Ana whimpered as he bit her earlobe, massaging her clitoris with his thumb. She did exactly as he said and bit her tongue as he was doing wonders to her body, and when he had three fingers inside her, she threw a pillow over her head to muffle the sound. His thrusts were short and erratic, pushing her a little bit more to the edge, but it was only when his tongue started to play with her clitoris that she knew that she was far gone.

He pleasured her, taking her closer and closer to climax, and when she felt that her orgasm was near, he took her pillow away from her, and watched her from between her legs. Her mouth form an 'o', exhaling a soundless scream as her whole body tensed and her back arched from the bed. And finally, she found release, slowly coming down from her high.

Christian slowly kissed his way up, before swiftly pecking her lips and falling next to her. She always appreciated that, when he went down on her, he didn't kiss her right after, but slowly erased the taste of her by kissing his way up. It wasn't that she was repulsed by her own taste, but more that she liked it better when Christian had this little and subtle attention for her.

For a couple of minutes, they did not say a word, Ana being blissful as Christian gently caressed her arm. But then, she found it odd that he did not try to take her, like any other time. So she climbed on top of him, playing with his buckle, when he stopped her with a small smile.

"I didn't plan for this to happen. I was simply supposed to put the rose by your side and leave. I don't have any protection."

"You went to Vegas without protection?" She taunted, preaching what was wrong to know what was true.

Christian smiled at her, reaching up to caress her face, "You weren't with me in Vegas, so why would I have needed condoms there."

She couldn't help but smile at that. She knew that Christian would be faithful, even more now that they redefined their relationship to something more than a hookup. But Vegas wasn't called Sin City for nothing, and it was always reassuring to hear these words from him.

Still, she didn't let it take her away from her prime mission. "Then, maybe I should return the favour of what you just did to me," she lusciously said, undoing his belt, and once again Christian stopped her.

She repressed her desire to roll her eyes and simply let herself fall on the bed next to Christian who immediately took her in his arms, putting his nose on the crook of her neck, "I _really_ missed you."

"You didn't call much," She reminded him, and as she expected it, he remained silent at that. Every time she was trying to know a bit more about him, Christian closed himself, though she had to admit, he had been working on that particular aspect of him since Paris. And this is exactly what he did,

"I know. I had a lot in my mind, and I didn't want to put it on you."

"Okay," she simply said, trying not to smile at the fact that Christian opened up to her. For a few moments, they remained silent, and Ana knew what Christian was doing. He was waiting for her to fall asleep so he could leave, but she didn't want him to leave yet, so she questioned,

"Can I ask you something?"

"You know you can," He said, his eyes closed as he kept drying soothing circles on her skin. She watched his face, before chickening out of her question, and ask something else entirely different,

"Why don't you ever let me go down?"

He half-smiled, and Ana was sure that he was fully aware that whatever her initial question was, it wasn't this one. "I tend to be pretty loud when I have lips around my dick."

"So? It's not the first time you stopped me from giving you a blowjob."

Christian opened his eyes and Ana saw that there was mirth dancing in them, proving that he was making fun of her and where her questions were leading her. "In case you didn't notice, I am well endeavoured, and no matter how pretty your lips are, I don't think they are a good fit for me."

Ana pouted, sure that she could prove Christian wrong, and he kissed her to ease her pout away. Sure Christian had a monster-cock, but that didn't mean that she couldn't please him. After all, if her lady parts adapted to him, so would her mouth.

"How about your obsession to watch women climax?" She asked because this had been something she had been wondering about for a long time. Christian _loved_ watching her climax, and this night just proved her right once again. He risked her making noise, just so he could watch her ride her orgasm.

Christian chuckled shaking a little his head and making Ana frown. He reached up to erase the furrow between her brows and confessed, "This is fairly new." He looked straight into her eyes, his thumb now caressing her cheek, "It's … your eyes. They are … the thing I love most about you. I could spend hours looking at them. But you would call me a creep if I did so."

Ana blushed, but still agreed with Christian, "I would most definitely call you a creep, indeed."

Still, she smiled at him, doing her best to not get excited about Christian's words. She knew Christian, and she knew that subtlety and weaving double meanings into his words weren't his speciality. So she shouldn't start overthinking what he said, and simply take the words as they were a simple statement.

Christian kept on looking at her, and she felt so safe at that given moment that she finally gathered the courage to ask her previous question.

"I want to ask you something else."

"Really?" He said with a mocking smile on his lips.

"My first question wasn't really what I wanted to ask." Christian kept his smile in place, caressing her arm as he waited for the real question. "Are you a criminal?"

She had avoided asking this question to her father all her life. She had always done her best to ask the right things so she could delude herself into a lawful life. But … she felt that she needed to know with Christian. Maybe if she knew, Christian would be more open to her, and would call her more often next time he would go on a 'business trip'.

But Christian did not have the reaction she had expected of him. She thought he would try to leave, or elude an answer. She thought he would fall silent and tell her that she didn't need to know that of his life. What she did not expect was for Christian to start laughing.

"I was being serious," She pointed out, slapping his chest, and Christian did his best to regain control of himself.

"I'm sorry. It's the word in itself. Crossing the street when the light is red is against the law, and therefore makes you a criminal."

Ana frowned, not sure if she liked this answer. She could feel her brain claiming some sleep, but she was determined to have her answer, "Christian …"

"I'm sorry to tell you Ana that I have been a criminal since … well it seems since forever."

"What do you mean?" She asked, repressing a yawn.

Christian frowned, and Ana knew that this was his way to hide his surprise or his uncertainty. He pretended to think, when in fact, he was simply hiding raw emotions from the world. She gently caressed his face, feeling his stubble beneath her palm, and he took her hand and kissed it.

"It's a long story."

"It could be my bedtime story," She countered, repressing another moan. Christian shook his head.

"I highly doubt this story will give you sweet dreams."

"I'm a big girl," She bluffed, doing her best not to think of the horror movie she watched before bed.

Christian rose his eyebrow at her, knowing perfectly well that she was a chicken, but still laid her on the bed and switched off the light before he narrated,

"This is the story of a boy who was abandoned by his parents when he was little. He went into the system and bounced around from foster house to foster house, seeing all kind of things. He had greedy parents, irresponsible parents, parents who saw too big and adopted too many children, parents who tried to rape their foster children … He even had parents who tried to teach him racism.

Shortly before he turned twelve, the boy was adopted yet again. It seemed to be a rather stable family, with two other kids, two boys. Sure the family wasn't perfect, but it was stable. The Mom would easily slap her boys around when they misbehaved, but other than that, there was no violence, or other kinds of misbehaviour the boy had witnessed in other foster families.

A week after he turned twelve, the kid's foster father lost his job. It was a tough time for him, and he started drinking to drown his worries. With the drinking, came the violence, but it was only a few slaps around, and he always had a 'good excuse'. But then, the little boy had the misfortune to use the bathroom at the exact same moment that the man wanted to use it. So he beat the child to the pulp, to teach him not to stand in the way of adults. When the little boy thought he couldn't take it anymore, the man undid his belt and lashed on the kid, finishing with a hard last stroke, using the buckle of the belt…"

Ana looked up at Christian, but he seemed lost in his past, his eyes staring into nothing. There was a scar on Christian's bicep that Ana had seen a hundred time, and had always thought that was a scar proving a happy childhood. She had several like that. The scar when she fell from her swing, the scar when Kate and her tried to be mad scientists, the scar when she hurt herself on the edge of the pool. But they were all happy scars that brought a smile to her face when she would think of how she got them.

Christian's scar was sad, and brought painful memories. It was the proof that his past was dark and full of ghosts.

Christian continued his tale, his eyes still lost into space,

"The boy cried a lot that night, because for the first time, he knew he didn't do anything wrong. He knew that using the bathroom wasn't a bad thing because he had done it a million time before. So when the morning came, he had a fresh new will. He decided that never again someone would lay a finger on him, especially for silly reasons. He took his school bag and put some clothes in it. He stole the money the foster parents kept under their bed, and he never made it to school.

For a few weeks, he survived with the money he had stolen, but when that money was gone he was tempted to go back into the system. But the fear of getting a violent family got the best of him. So he lived in the streets, enduring the cold winter as he begged for food.

During two weeks, he survived like that, begging, even though nobody paid attention to him. People who are on top of the food chain don't look at those who are at the bottom. Especially when they are scary dirty little boys. So one day, when he was hungrier than usual, he stole from a bare, and when he saw how much good the warm bread did to him, it became his way of life."

When Christian finished his story, there was a small silence that Ana didn't dare break, though her heart was breaking for mini-Christian. It seemed that every time he shared a part of his youth with her, it was sadder and sadder, and she was far from liking it, especially since every time she had been the one digging the memory up.

Christian had a small smile as he cleared his throat, and he seemed to come back from a journey to the past, "And that's how I became a criminal as you would say it."

"You never finished school?" She asked, not that she really minded, but because this simple question allowed her to get a better grip of herself. If she were to listen to her heart, she would cry her eyes out for Christian.

"Surviving seemed more important at the time," He said with a mocking smile, looking at the ceiling.

Ana did her best to keep her tears in, but they still escaped and fell on his chest, making him snap his head to her and frown. He caresses her cheek with tenderness, smiling with gentleness as he told her,

"Don't cry. That boy is long gone."

She repressed a sob, keeping for herself that this was the sad part. That Christian didn't get to experience his childhood like any other kid. She weakly smiled, and Christian wiped away another tear that rolled on her cheek,

"You said you were a big girl. Don't be sad. I barely think of that part of my life anymore. It's far in the past."

Ana nodded, and something suddenly hit her. Christian had had such a sad life that she suddenly wondered if he was happy with the life he had at the moment. After all, he said it himself, he had to survive. Maybe it wasn't all for the best for him, and he wished his life had turned differently.

"Are you happy, Christian?"

Christian looked at her with surprise, clearly not expecting this question, and he told her, "I am happy with my life as it is, Ana. Even with the crappy start I had."

She smiled, content with this answer, and even more when he pressed her against him and added, kissing her neck, "I am even more happy with my life when I'm with you."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

When Ana woke up the next morning, she found the bed empty next to her, but she wasn't really surprised by it. She had been expecting much. For most part of the night, she struggled against sleep, talking with Christian about all and nothing; until Christian instructed to sleep and that they would see each other soon enough.

As she got up, she noticed a note below the golden rose, and she furiously blushed when she read it,

**I had a great night with you**

**And it became even more interesting when you fell asleep**

**Can't wait for our next night**

**We have a rain check I am looking forward to. **

More than once, Christian told her that she spoke in her sleep, but she usually didn't care much about it since she apparently mostly talked about broccolis and monsters from horror movies. Christian did mention a couple of times when she talked about her Mom, but he never really lingered on the thing. He said it was just a 'cute little thing she did'. What bothered Ana was the fact that Christian didn't tell her what she blurted about I'm her sleep, when he usually always did.

For a few minutes, she blnkly looked at the note, before she shook herself and went to the kitchen where she found Gail. She told the maid that she wanted to eat fruits and muesli for breakfast, and asked about her father's whereabouts.

"My best guess is that he is still home. Maybe you should ask him what he wants for breakfast," Gail suggested. Ana vigorously shook her head and instructed,

"He'll have fruits and muesli. He needs to pay attention to his health, and if I ask him, he's going to ask for eggs and bacon."

Gail knowingly smiled, looking for fruits as Ana went to look for her father. This was a recurrent battle between the two of them that she did not intend to lose. Two years ago, his health bill came back with alarming red dots all over it, but Raymond didn't seem to worry about it, saying that he was feeling as healthy as a bull.

She first went to his room, which was at the opposite side of hers (she had moved room shortly after turning sixteen, seeking a bit of privacy), and when she found it empty, she decided to check his office. She was about to open when she heard two voices talk about her, which made her lean her ear against the door, curious of who was talking to her father about her so early in the morning.

"I'm not sure that O'Neill is the best option."

"His track records are impeccable," Her father argued, and Ana frowned. She had recognised the second voice as belonging to Christian, and from what she had gathered, they were talking about this new surveillance her father wanted to put on her.

"O'Neill hardly blends in. He stands out too much in a crowd. You should put Luke on her back."

"Luke doesn't want to go on the field anymore."

"It's not much a field mission. And I don't think you should coo him like that. I think he is the best choice. He can follow her discreetly, and she already knows him. If she's in trouble, she will know that she can turn to him," Christian said, and Ana highly hoped that her father would go with this. Luke already had to follow her around, and she had managed to shake him off. So she knew that it wouldn't be a problem to the same again, if he were to become her unofficial shadow.

She strained her ear a little more, and when she heard that they were talking about something else, she decided that it was time for her to barge in, and pretend that she knew nothing of who was in the office.

"Dad, it's time to put some food in your system!" She brightly exclaimed as she opened the door.

Her father was sitting behind his desk, whilst Christian was standing by the door, his winter coat on. She feigned surprise and stared at Christian, as she pretended, "Sorry, I didn't know you had company."

Raymond shook his head, getting up as he assured his daughter, "Christian just came by to let me know of some important business. We were finished."

Ana smiled at him, removing herself from the threshold as Raymond stepped out of his office, shortly followed by Christian. He turned to the man, and proposed, "Care to join us?"

As Ana knew he would, Christian shook his head, declining the offer as the three of them walked away from the office. And when Raymond insisted for Christian to stay, he gave the best excuse he could, "I am meeting Jose in an hour, and I'd like to have a shower first. Plus, I have a cat that I I need to feed."

"Since when do you have a cat?" Raymond mused.

"I got him shortly after Christmas," Christian answered, before closing his coat, and taking the Steele's leaf, "I will see you some other time."

After he left, Ana and her father went to the dining room where Gail had prepared their breakfast, and Raymond grimaced when he saw that his high cholesterol breakfast was off the menu. But he did not bring up the argument. Ana was sipping though her coffee, when her father inquired,

"By the way, you still didn't tell me who you're taking to Kate's wedding."

"Paul Clayton," She said, taking some mangos and strawberries. She felt her father's eyes on her, so she clarified, "We are going as acquaintances. He is _not_ my date."

This did not seem to appease Raymond, who put down his fork as he asked, "Do I need to be worried?"

"Of what?"

"Well, you want to move out. And now, I learn that you're taking that _politician as_ your plus one. Is there something you need to tell me?"

Ana simply smiled, taking interest in her muesli as she reminded her father of Paul's major flaw, "Like you said, Dad, he is a politician. A nice politician, sure, but a politician nonetheless."

Raymond scoffed, and Ana rolled her eyes. She didn't like politicians because she always felt that they were lying through their teeth, and though Paul was a nice guy to be around, she knew that she would never go out with him. Or there would need to be a very good reason behind that.

"Ana, politicians are anything but nice. Sharks are better qualified for that word than politicians," Raymond warned, and Ana couldn't help but keep on smiling. Her father was preaching to an already converted soul.

"He is not my boyfriend, if that was your well-hidden question, Dad."

"Then who is?" Raymond asked, his eyes narrowed at his daughter and Ana inwardly facepalmed herself. She knew that her father was a man who paid dire attention to every single word, sometimes seeing double meanings where there weren't any. But this time he was right. She had a boyfriend, one that she didn't want to be taken away by her father, so she lied with sarcasm,

"Casper." Her father's eyes narrowed so much more that she doubted that he could actually see anything. "Really, Dad. It's not like I can date whomever I want. If I were to listen to you, I would never have my big day."

"Of course you will," Raymond immediately argued back, making Ana sadly shake her head as she pointed out to him,

"You do realise that for that to happen, I need to date first. _Before_ the wedding."

"Have I ever forbidden you to do so?"

"You scared away all the boys that I ever presented to you!" She exclaimed, not believing that her father was playing the victim card when he was the one giving her troubles.

Raymond longly looked at her, making her feel that he suddenly knew all her dirty secrets (including the one she was doing her best to hide), and then he resumed eating as he conceded, "I'll make you a deal. I will never scare away any other boy that you will introduce me to as your boyfriend."

"I don't do boys anymore, Dad. I'm not a paedophile," She pointed out because she knew how her father was good at using words against people. Raymond had a small smile, seeing that his daughter saw right through him.

"I won't scare any _men_ that you will introduce me to," He rectified. Ana smiled, but she wasn't stupid enough to blurt out about her boyfriend to her father.

"Okay," She simply said, finishing her muesli.

"So? Are you going to introduce me to him?"

Ana smiled at her father, picking on the mangoes at the centre of the table as she repeated herself, "As I told you, Paul is not my boyfriend."

Raymond held her gaze for a moment, testing her lie, before he nodded and unknowingly giving her relief, "Okay."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So this chapter was important for many things, but one in ****particular. I want you to remember that in this chapter, we learn why Christian doesn't drink. it has been said several times that he doesn't take alcohol, but now we have a very vivid explanation as to why! and this is part of Christian and of what he became. keep this in mind, Christian doesn't drink, and we know why. **

**~ Moreover, we had Ana's perspective on things. remember that Ana is younger than Christian and that she has had a very sweet life. every obstacle that one usually has in life, she didnt get, so she is more naive than him on many things of life.**

**~ And finally, I wanted to show the dynamic between Ana and her father from their perspective. Christian knows that they love each other, but I wanted to show, more than tell. Their love is strong, and I think it is well shown in this chapter. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of our couple in this ****chapter? It was short, but with a lot happened between them. And what do you think Ana said while sleeping?**

**💚What do you think of Raymond?**

**💚 What did you think of Ana in this chapter?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but this chapter doesn't have any answers. I am rather tired, and I will be back to answering reviews for the next chapter. Also, I will try to put ten chapters out there by the end of the year, but that's just a try. And THANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	26. Chapter 25: Friends & Foes

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 25: Friends & Foes ****(2,4K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚 I know this chapter is short, but the next one is big, just like the previous one, so please bear with me.**

**💚 And pay attention to the title and of who we think is friend, and who we think is foe ...**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

As Christian washed his hands, he hoped that his bathroom break lasted long enough for the movie he was watching with Ana to be almost over. She had come to spend the night with him and thought that watching _The Phantom Of The Opera_ was a great idea. To which Christian had to strongly disagree. Maybe it was because it was a musical, or maybe it was simply because he found the plot boring, but he couldn't wait for this movie to be over.

He walked back to his room, where he found out to his greatest dismay that Ana had paused the movie, waiting for him. He repressed a sigh, and slid back into bed, pointing out,

"You didn't have to wait for me. I would have caught up with the story just fine."

Ana chuckled, rolling her eyes, and she told him, "You're worse than Dad. At least, he doesn't run and hide in the bathroom, and pretends he has business meetings when I take him see a musical."

"I can hardly pretend I have a meeting now, can't I?" He countered, making the brunette laugh at him. She shook a little her head and promised,

"Next time, I will pick a horror movie."

Christian smiled, though he kept for himself that he doubted that would be a good idea either. Though it seemed to Ana liked to scare herself with movies where demons and evil entities were summoned, she rarely assumed the consequences when it was time to sleep, and always asked to sleep with the light on.

She squinted her eyes suspiciously at his smile, apparently reading on his face what his mouth wouldn't say, but she decided to not linger on her ability to watch a horror movie. Instead, she made herself comfortable on the bed, facing her laptop and spooning against Christian as she said with a pouty tone,

"I don't care what either of you says. When I'll have children, I will make them love musicals, and we will use any occasions to go to Broadway together."

"And what if your children don't like musicals?"

"I will _make_ them like musicals. Because no child of mine will know a Disney by heart, but not the lyrics of Chicago, or The Phantom Of The Opera!" She retorted with vigour.

Christian repressed a chuckle, though he did not venture further into that topic for he knew how deep Ana's love for musicals was. She gave him a satisfied scoff, and pressed play on the movie, letting people keep singing about their masquerade, whilst there was a murderous psycho still living within the walls of the Opera house.

With a blank eye, Christian watched the movie play out, barely paying attention to it; and his focus came back to reality when Ana mentioned, "It's been forever since I've been to Broadway. I should see if Kate and Elliott are interested in anything new that came out this season."

Christian simply made a noise to indicate to the brunette that he had heard her, but he kept for himself his true feelings concerning that statement. He was actually bothered by the fact that he couldn't do that simple thing with her. Sure, he didn't really appreciate watching musicals, but that didn't mean he wouldn't have sucked it up for one night if it meant taking his girl out.

Still, it was not a discussion he was willing to rehash with Ana, given the fact that the last time that mentioned their agreement, and how he wouldn't mind bending it, she almost had a fit. Ana was dead serious about keeping their relationship secret from her father, and she was not open nor ready to change that. The argument actually ended with Ana going to bed angry against Christian, and Christian swore to himself that it would be the first and last time that it would happen. He didn't like how it made him feel and liked even less feeling that cold between them.

Sometimes, he wondered if Ana wasn't more interested in the thrill of being with him as a secret from her father, than in being with him simply because they felt good together. But he tried to not overthink about this. Especially since he couldn't talk to anyone about it to have an objective point-of-view. Well, he could ask Jose, but Christian knew that Jose would disapprove hearing that Christian wanted to take yet a step further in his relationship with Ana.

So instead of thinking of how complicated his personal life had become now that he was entertaining a relationship, he focused his thoughts on his work, and how this had become complicated as well. Ever since Raphael had been shot, Christian had started purging the people working for them, not even giving the benefits of the doubt when he doubted their purposes and true intentions. But the more he was leaguing the parasites that would prevent Idris to thrive, the more he was uncovering things that he didn't like.

The main one being the fact that many of those dealers that were trying to undermine Raymond didn't have that idea on heir own, and even more importantly, did not work solely for Idris. Many of those leaders had started taking orders from the Mazarati's. A Italian family that was trying to take Raymond's place for as long as Christian could remember.

Raymond and him had talked about it, and though Raymond had decided to take a more subtle form of striking back, Christian was for going against them right at this second, and show them who they were dealing with. Raymond had argued on this option that if they were to destroy the Mazarati clan, they would need to pick up the pieces, and there were many businesses that the Italian clan mingled with, that Raymond wanted nothing to do with.

So Christian bit his bone on this one, though that did not mean that he put his guard down. On the contrary, he asked several of his men to keep a close eye on the Mazarati patriarch and to keep tabs of everything he was doing and everyone he was seeing. And though that did not help to reveal anything interesting at the moment, Christian knew that it would be useful at some point in the future.

The movie ended, and Ana barely lasted five seconds before falling asleep. Christian smiled at himself, kissing her cheek before he got up to put her laptop away and tuck her in properly. Even though Ana loved to sleep, Christian never saw her fall asleep in front of a movie. Though she never resisted long after the end credits.

When he snuggled into bed next to her, he watched her peacefully sleep, his mind now troubled by yet another problem. It had been several months since Paris, and therefore since he gave Ana his word that he would look for her brother, and no matter how he tried, it always seem to lead to be a dead end. It seemed that shortly before his seventeenth birthday, Michael Steele disappeared into thin air. And this only meant one thing.

Still, he wasn't ready, or willing to give bad news to Ana without concrete proof, and it seemed that the only way he would get any was to ask Raymond about it. And here was the conundrum, how could he question Raymond about a son he officially had never heard off, without compromising his relationship with Ana?

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Two days after Ana made Christian watch a musical about a man with half a face living beneath a French building, Christian found himself in a little café, waiting for Jack Hyde. The young man had sent him an email stating that he needed to meet Christian for important and personal reasons, and Christian was starting to grow impatient of the young man's delay.

He was about to get up and leave, when he finally appeared, out of breath and sweaty, and apologising profusely for his lateness. Christian dismissed the idea, his curiosity now picked concerning Jack's reasons for wanting to see him. The young man tried to make small talks, but Christian immediately stopped him. He had never been fond of small talks,

"So? What did you want to talk about?"

"My father," The other man said, making Christian rise an eyebrow at him. He couldn't understand why Jack would go to him, to talk about his father, when many people knew that Christian had been anything but cold toward the older man.

"I have come to learn a few things about him recently, and I want to take his place at the head of the company," Jack explained, but Christian's mind was only half focused on him. He had just spotted Jason Taylor a few tables over and was trying to figure out what the Agent could want with him.

"Whatever squabble you have with your father, I don't see what it has to do with me," Christian said, keeping the FBI agent in his line of vision.

"I want you to help me to take over."

"And why would I do that? Your father has done no wrong to the company."

"Because if you help me, I will take the company further than my father ever could," Jack confidently declared.

Christian rose his eyebrow once again at the young man. If he were honest with himself, he honestly thought that Jack had the potential to make Robinson Inc' thrive even more. But on the other hand, it wasn't up to him to take such hasty decisions, and he didn't want the young Hyde to think that things would always be easy like that with him.

So Christian deeply exhaled with a small smirk, and simply told the man sitting in front of him, "Prove it to me, and then we'll talk."

Jack looked at him with a little surprise, before getting up and leaving Christian alone at the table, probably off to find a way to prove to Christian that it would all be in his best interest. Christian watched the young Hyde exiting the café, a part of him hoping that he would find a way to soon get rid of his father since Christian was anything but fond of the old man.

He waited a few minutes, curious to see if the FBI agent would come and sit on his own, but when the seat previously occupied by Jack Hyde remained empty, Christian looked in the direction of Jason Taylor to catch his attention and pointed with his eyes the empty chair in front of him.

Jason Taylor tried to hide a smile, before walking to Christian and taking the offered seat. As soon as he was seated, Christian asked with a smug tone, "Are you following me to see if I am still s small fish?"

The FBI agent shook a little his head, sliding a file in front of him, "I mentioned someone the last time I saw you, and then, I realised that if Raymond covered his tracks well, even you wouldn't even know who he is."

Christian glanced at the file, on which was labeled '_Michael Steele_'. He kept his face unreadable, as if unfazed by this name, and even had the snark to retort with a smirk, "Aren't I supposed to have an illicit affair with the Steele girl? Because I would think I would know all about another Steele if I were to bed one."

Jason grimaced, making Christian smile. "Okay, I admit, I read too much into you going to Paris with Anastasia," He admitted. "But that doesn't mean that you should disregard what this file says," He insisted, tapping the file.

Once again, Christian glanced at the closed file, showing disinterest, but did not make a move to take it in his hand. Jason Taylor had a small smile, and got up, pushing the file closer to Christian as he told him,

"Anyway, I thought I should show you good faith for you to understand that I only have your best interests at heart. People close to Raymond Steele have this tendency to disappear in a rather permanent way. His wife, his son, his best friend. I would be wary if I were you."

On those words, the Agent left, and Christian waited a few more minutes before taking the file in his hands. And the more he read about Michael Steele, the more he doubted that the young Steele simply 'ran away'. He seemed to be too much like Ana to be able to disappear into thin air.

Michael Steele was a straight A scholar, very friendly and in touch with his family. But most importantly, he saw that Raymond was training his son the same way that he was training Christian. Reading between the lines, Christian could even tell that Raymond had introduced his son to his side activities, the exact same way that he was doing with him. Which comforted Christian in his idea that Raymond was training him to take over, though he wasn't sure how he felt about that.

For another hour, Christian read over and over the file, until it finally clicked in his brain. This could be his opening to ask Raymond about his son, without talking about Ana. So he swiftly drove to the Steele mansion and went straight to Raymond's office. There, he found Raymond, fondly smiling at him when he saw him, but he did not let the man utter a single word.

"Explain this," Christian demanded, looking straight into his mentor's eyes.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So ****cliffy! This doesn't sound good ... Oulala, excited for next chapter?**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of our couple in this ****chapter? All cute and normal, though Christian might have some resentment ...**

**💚What do you think Raymond will say?**

**💚 What did you think of Christian's theory concerning Ana's brother?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but this chapter doesn't have any answers. I am rather tired, and I will be back to answering reviews soon. Also, I will try to put ten chapters out there by the end of the year, but that's just a try. And THANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	27. Chapter 26: What Made Raymond Steele

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 26****: What Made Raymond Steele The Father He Is (11,2K!)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

**💚 So, you have been waiting for this point-of-view since …. Forever I think. And though this chapter is Raymond's point-of-view, it will be filled with flashbacks. You have to take this chapter more as a bonus chapter, than anything else. Mostly because Christian will only know one thing coming out of this chapter. Which I will highlight to you, so pay attention to the little notes. **

💚** Moreover, I want you to pay real attention to this chapter and the relationship that Raymond have with the people in his life, because this chapter really helps us understand the man he is, and the why he is the way he is. And pay attention to the time jumps as well. Well, pay attention to the chapter as a whole, haha**

**💚 And of course, given the ****length, I didn't have time to edit anything, so be nice. If you see something terrible, be dear broccolis, and let me know.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**22 years ago**

**(remember Christian owns the apartment that used to belong to Raymond)**

Raymond looked at his young son, sticking his tongue out as he was being careful not to step over the line. He was trying to find the right words to tell his son, but nothing came to his mind, which annoyed him. He always had a way with words, able to put into words every single thought and emotions that came to him, and here he was at a loss of words in front of a three years old.

With a sigh, he crouched, looking at the Mickey Mouse colouring his son was so invested in, and Mike said with all the seriousness of the world, "Dad! You're blocking my light!"

Raymond chuckled, shaking his head as he moved a little to the side so his son could enjoy the natural sunlight, and he told him, "I was thinking that we could spend the afternoon together."

At those words, Mike turned a happy face to him, revealing all his teeth, before a frown shaded his face. "But we are Wednesday. You always go back to work on Wednesdays," He accused.

Being a single father with the activities he had was not an easy thing, and Raymond was ever so grateful to have Elena and Eric by his side to help him. Too often for his taste, he had to leave his son, to travel, for late nights, for impromptu 'business meetings'; and he disliked every single one of those times. Which was why he always made a point to have lunch with his son every single day, and spend a little time with him. Even if it was just watching him colour a silly drawing.

"I decided that I would not work this afternoon," He let the young boy know. "I am seeing a friend this afternoon, and I wanted you to come with me."

Mike pouted a little, returning his attention to his drawing, and this little gesture gave Raymond a pinch in his heart. It wasn't much the pouting that upset him, but more that his son was upset, and that he tried to hide, just like he used to do when he was young, by focusing on something else.

"You don't want to come with me?" Raymond inquired, and Mike shrugged, not looking away from his Mickey Mouse.

"I don't want to go and be bored because you talk work with your friend," He admitted. Raymond smiled at that, and got up as he said with a light tone,

"You're right. You should stay here with your colouring and your plain water, whilst my friend and I go to the park and get ourselves some ice-cream. I heard that there might even be a movie later on …"

Mike immediately took the bait, standing on his feet at the speed of light as he exclaimed, "Ice-cream? I'm coming, I'm coming!"

His enthusiasm made his father chuckle before he got up and ruffled his hair as he told him, "Go find Edna and tell her that you're leaving with me."

Mike rushed out upstairs, screaming for his nanny, and Raymond sat on the sofa waiting for his son to come back down. He closed his eyes, straining his ear to listen to his son marvel at the fact that he was going out for ice-cream and taunting his nanny about it. Edna was really strict, and not very fond on giving sugar foods to children. But she liked Mike very much and cared for him just the way Raymond expected her to do so, so he kept her. He even liked the fact that she had restrictions for the boy, and did not give him everything he wanted, just because he said so.

He heard the nanny tell the boy to stand still so she could comb his hair, and Mike argue that his hair was just fine since she did it in the morning, and he couldn't help but smile. Those were the moments he liked the most in his life, the little mundane moments he had with his son, reminding him that the only important thing there was in this world, it was his family.

Mike stumbled back downstairs, and brightly smiled to his father as he ran to the door, "I'm ready, Dad! Let's go."

"What did I say about running in an apartment?" Edna chastised, putting her fists on her hips and giving the young boy the big eye. Mike looked down, and apologised whilst Raymond put his coat on.

"Don't wait for us, Edna. Enjoy your afternoon," Raymond let her know as he took his son's hand in his, and they exited the apartment.

Mike did not say a word in the car ride, though Raymond could see his excitement of going out for ice-cream. It was after all, his son's weakness. Ice-cream, and dragon toys. still, he was rather nervous as to how this day will go, and he hoped it will go for the better. This particular meeting could change his life for the better, or the duller.

Once they reached destination, he found Carla waiting for the two of them on a bench near the park, and a smile immediately illuminated his face.

Carla was like an angel that came into his life three months ago. She was sweet, caring, loving, and most of all, understanding. From the moment he met her, he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, and so he had been honest about who he was, and though she did not welcome that part of his life with open arms, she still understood.

But here was the thing, he was not alone anymore, and he had to put his child's happiness before his own. If Mike didn't want to include Carla in their little family, Raymond would understand and back away from the gorgeous brunette, though he hoped it would not come to that.

When she saw the two of them, Carla waved at them, and Mike tugged on his father's arm, "Is she your friend?"

"Yes, she is."

Mike made a face, a small pout on his lips as he pointed out, "You could have told me. I would have let Edna comb my hair nice. I look like Goofy."

Raymond repressed a laugh, and they closed the distance between them and Carla, who immediately crouched so she could be at the same level as Mike. She brightly smiled at the blond boy, and introduced herself, "Hello, Michael. I am Carla, and I'm so pleased to meet you. I have heard so much about you."

"Really?" Carla nodded, making the young boy smile, and he let go of his father's hand to take the brunette's. "You know, you can call me Mike."

"In that case, you can call me Car," She let the young blond know, and Raymond frowned for he never heard that nickname before. Mike grinned, and repeated the given name.

And just like that, Mike completely forgot about his father as they spent the afternoon at the park, eating ice-cream and flying from swings. Raymond had to admit, it was the first time he was seeing his son like that, running all over the place and laughing without end; and he vouched to himself that no matter the outcome of this day, he will take it upon himself to take his son out more often.

Sure he spent time with him, but it was for barely an hour, and it was clear that Mike needed more than that. He also made a mental note to ask Elena and Edna if Mike acted like that when he was alone with either of them. He watched his son have fun, tugging more than once on Carla's hand for her to push him on the swing, or for him to tell her a special story, and hope lit up his heart. Maybe they could all end up being a family together.

After the three of them had dinner together at Raymond's restaurant, the two Steeles told their goodbyes to the brunette, and Raymond assured her that he would call her the next day. During their ride home, Mike marvelled again and again on how great of a day it was, until he fell asleep on his father's laps. Once in front of his building, Raymond took his son in his arms, and took him home, where he found Elena and Eric waiting for him, each holding a glass of wine.

Raymond shook his head, and went to tuck in his son who was dead to the world, before going back downstairs.

"So? Did Mike like Carla?" Eric asked, pouring a glass of wine to his long time friend.

"He adored her. I think he actually forgot about me at some point."

The three adults laughed, and Raymond explained what happened during the afternoon, and how much Mike enjoyed having a new friend who listened to him and his stories about dragons. "He almost had a heart attack when she told him that where she came from, dragons had still an impact on the way people view life."

"So? When are you going to pop the question, then?" Elena asked, and Raymond smiled to his glass.

He loved Carla, and he knew that he wanted to be with her for the rest of his life, and for her to have his children. He wanted to give her the world, and even more. But there was still one problem, "I still did not talk to Mike about it."

"You said that he liked her," Eric pointed out, and Raymond nodded, before explaining,

"He likes her, but I want to give him more than one outing for him to know her. This is huge for him. If Carla and I are to get married, she will become part of our family, and I want to make sure Mike is okay with that."

"What if he says no?" Eric challenged, perfectly aware that Raymond had been smitten by Carla from day one; and as hard as it was to admit it, Raymond uttered,

"Then I will respect my son's wish."

Eric was about to argue, when Elena cut him down, "This is what it means to be parent, you put your child first, no matter how much it hurts."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**22 years ago **

Raymond walked inside his apartment, exhausted, but happy to be home. That past month had been horrible with drug dealers, and one of the casinos he had in Vegas had been plagued with several cases of people counting cards, to the point where he and Eric had to go there to put their foot down and change both manager and security there.

On the counter of the kitchen, he found an apple pie, next to which there was a note from Carla, which made his heart warm and his lips smile.

**Mike and I baked this for you**

**But since the two of us have a sweet tooth**

**We already ate half of it**

**And Mike says that there better be some left for his breakfast**

**So enjoy a tiny piece of it**

**Love, Carla **

He cut himself a piece, making sure to leave enough for the morning, and engulfed it as if nothing. Carla and Mike had grown closer over the past couple of months since they first saw each other. In fact, they often spent time together, without Raymond since he was too busy working. Carla had become Mike's favourite topic. He could talk for hours about what he did with her, or how well she could paint, or how he loved when she was reading stories because she made funny voices. Raymond could tell with the shadow of a doubt that his son adored his lover.

After taking a shower to wash away the journey, Raymond erased into his bed, where he was soon disturbed by his son who was looking at him with tears in his eyes. "I had a nightmare."

Raymond softly smiled at his son and motioned him to come to the bed. Mike rushed there, looking behind his shoulder if no monster followed him, and he snuggled against his father, looking for comfort.

"Was your nightmare that terrible?"

"There was a huge ladybug that wanted to squash us all! And she was blue!"

Raymond gently rubbed his son's arm, comforting him as he smiled at the silliness of the young boy's nightmare, and once the sobs finally ended, Mike said with a small voice,

"I'm glad you're back. I was lonely."

"Didn't Carla come to visit you?"

"She did, but then she left. And Edna is no fun like you or Car."

Raymond remained silent for a moment, looking at the silhouette of his son, before he let the young boy know, "What if Carla came here to live with us?"

Mike's head rose up, and looked at Raymond, "She could do that?"

"She could be part of our family. She could be your new Mommy, and we wouldn't need Edna anymore," Raymond reasoned, and this made Mike sit down, forcing Raymond to switch on the light of his bedside to see his son. Mike's face was all rumpled, focused on what his father had just told him.

For a long moment, the young boy thought, before he shook his head with denial, "I don't want Car to be my new mommy. I want her to be Car, just Car."

"So you wouldn't mind if she joined the family?" Raymond inquired, a part of him touched by the way his son was seeing Carla. She was a special friend to the little boy.

"Are you going to marry her? Is she going to live here like Aunt Elena and Uncle Eamon?" Mike asked with suspicion, squatting his eyes in this adorable way he did, when he was sure to have uncovered a mystery only known by adults.

"I am going to marry her," The father confirmed, sitting up in his bed, and reaching for his nightstand. "Do you want to see the ring?"

Mike eagerly nodded, and took the small box in his small hands, examining the piece of jewellery, as if he was an expert on the matter. "I thought there would be a dragon on it," He said with disappointment, before quickly asking, his eyes sparkling with wonder, "Can _I_ give it to her?"

Raymond laughed, ruffling his son's hair and he switched the light back off, making a mental note to let Carla know that he had some competition in the courtship of her person.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**21 years ago**

Raymond watched as the cargo sailed away, filled with weaponry on their way to Cuba. He and Eric had had a rough past week, but all he could think of was going back home to his wife and son after a long week of absenteeism.

He had married six months ago, and the happiest person about that union was Mike. He _adored_ Carla, and Carla loved the little boy as if he were her own. Their relationship had developed so much, that sometimes, Raymond felt like _he_ was the outsider out of the three of them. Carla never tried to replace his mother in Mike's heart (even though he actually had no memory of his birth mother), and Mike always refused to call her Mom. Like he would often say, Carla was just Car, his special friend.

Elena often joked that Mike was at this age were Oedipus complex came, and that Raymond should beware of what Mike could put in the cookies he would make with Carla. Especially after Ethan had declared that when he would be older, he would marry his mother, and keep his father around as a butler. This ought to make their little circle of friends laugh for a few days, at the young boy's expense.

Raymond had complete trust in Carla and the education that she would give his son, which was why he let go of Nanny Edna (to Mike's greatest pleasure). Carla had a very patient nature toward Mike and was far less strict that the nanny he used to have. And most importantly, Carla was there for Mike, when Raymond wasn't. She witnessed the loss of his first tooth, his first cast when he fell off the swing, and most importantly, his first fight.

And this ought to bring an argument between Carla and Raymond. When Raymond came home that night and learnt that his son had been beaten up, his first reaction was to ask if he fought back. then, he gave his son a lecture of how life wasn't all pink, and that how he should never give up on a fight, and always make sure to come out triumphant out of it.

That night, when Mike was put to bed, Carla argued with Raymond, telling him that he shouldn't be so harsh on a four years old.

"Life isn't sweet, Carla. The sooner he learns it, the better," Raymond had retorted, the painful memory of his own experience stinging his heart.

"It isn't about sweet or not. It is about your son being only four! All he needed was a hug and words of reassurance, not his father telling him that he didn't fight good enough!"

"As I said, the sooner the better," Raymond had repeated, to which Carla had crossed her arms on her chest, and asked,

"And if Mike had been a girl, would you have been so keen to give her the same advice?"

This had had the merit to make Raymond think twice about his answer. When they were young, both Eric and him often went to extraordinary lengths to protect Elena, whether it was to pass by her school every now and then to make sure no one bothered her, or hide some difficulties of life to her. But Raymond always liked to think that it was more because she was younger, than because she was a girl.

But a part of him had always been grateful that his first child had been a boy. He would get to protect his younger siblings, and now, Raymond had an heir for his empire. And though he would have given the reins of his company to his child, boy or girl, there was this part of him that was relieved that it was a boy.

"I would have. Life is hard, Carla, and … he should get used to this. He is going to run this whole organisation one day."

Carla had known very early on in their relationship what kind of activities Raymond did in the dark, and even though she was that caring socialite, helping every single soul she met, she accepted him as he was. And when he asked her to marry him, he told her that he wouldn't hide this part of his life to his children either, to which she agreed, saying that it was better for their children to know first hand, than to learn it from somebody else.

With a shudder, Raymond shook himself out of his memory, and took leaf from Eric before getting a cab back to his building. It was Mike's birthday the next day, and Carla had been very adamant about how neither of them would forgive Raymond if he missed on that day. She had prepared a whole birthday party, with the theme of dragons, and had demanded that he was present for his son's fifth birthday. Especially after learning that he missed out on the last one.

When he got home, he found the pair eating cookies in front of a kid movie, and he silently made his way to the sofa, surprising the both of them when he sat next to them. Carla jumped, and slapped his arm, she hated when he appeared out of nowhere, and how it scared her, but Raymond couldn't help himself to do it again. He loved seeing how her eyes passed from fright to pure love in an instant, and if a small slap on his arm was the price to pay, he would gladly pay it.

Mike jumped on his father's laps, knocking the air out of his lungs, and excitedly told him, "Today was the best day _ever_!"

Raymond rose an eyebrow at his son, and rectified him, "You mean tomorrow."

Mike solely shook his head and exchanged a mischievous smile with Carla as he opened his robe and explained, "No. Today was better than tomorrow. Car bought me a new shirt."

Raymond smiled before he even looked at the shirt, sure that his son was exaggerating, like most children his age usually did. But then, his eyes landed on the marking of the shirt, and his heart started beating like it was about to explode of joy. It was a plain white shirt, but the letters on it formed: "**_I'm the big brother_**."

He turned his head to his wife for confirmation, and she happily smiled before swiftly kissing his lips. And at that right moment, Raymond couldn't think of a moment he had been any happier. Mike bounced on his father's laps, all excited for his Dad to finally be in the secret.

"Car said that she would get a big tummy like Aunt Elena, and even bigger! And that I would get to have a baby brother or sister. But I already have Ethan, so I want a baby sister. And I will get to show her tricks, like how to make dragons with your hands, just like Car taught me. And she will be _my_ baby sister, so no one will ever take her away from me! And I will be a very good boy, and I will protect her. And …"

Raymond let his son keep on talking about how everything would be even better after the baby was born, and he couldn't help the happy smile that was on his face. He would have to look for houses big enough to take in his growing family. He had always wanted a big family, and Carla didn't oppose to it. She said that she herself coming from an only child family, she didn't want the same for her kids. She was not up for ten children, but she was ready to have more than a couple of kids.

And finally, they had their second one in the making …

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**20 years ago**

"It's to wonder who's most excited about meeting your little girl," Eric joked as he watched Mike hop from one foot to the other, impatient for the elevator to open its door.

Carla had given birth to a healthy baby girl during the night, and Raymond had told his son the news first thing in the morning, after having spent the night by his wife's side whilst she was pushing their little girl into this world. And ever since he had heard that his baby sister had finally arrived, Mike had not been able to stop talking and jumping all over the place. He had insisted that they go by a florist to bring roses, and that they bought a teddy bear, because he saw it in a movie.

He was beyond excited, and this was why, when they reached the door of Carla's room, Raymond crouched and looked deep in his son's green eyes. If Mike had taken anything after his mother, it was her eyes.

"Son, Carla is really tired, so you have to behave in there." Mike nodded with eagerness, already reaching for the handle, but Raymond stopped him once again, "And you have to keep your voice down for the baby."

"Like when I visit Ethan?" Mike asked, referring to the little sister Ethan got himself a few months ago.

Raymond nodded, and Mike put on his serious face. Eric smiled at this little man trying suddenly to hide his excitement and told Raymond that he would visit Carla some other time, giving them some family moment. When Raymond opened the door, it seemed that Mike forgot all about his seriousness, and rushed to Carla, jumping on the bed and hugging her tight.

"How is my favourite man?" She asked, hugging him back.

She smiled at her husband who kissed her forehead, before putting the giant bouquet of roses that he bought with Mike, on her bedside. Then, he looked at the baby sleeping in her crib, barely bothered by the commotion that just happened, and though he knew he should let her sleep, he couldn't help but take her in his arms and sit next to his wife.

Mike looked at the new member of his family from Carla's arms, and she told him, "Meet your baby sister, Mike."

"I thought she would look like me. Kate looks like Ethan," He accused, betrayal sipping in his tone as his eyes analysed the little baby.

She was a brunette like her mother, and her skin was so fair, that one could see her little veins beneath it. Mike, on the other hand looked a lot like his father, which he was very proud of. He liked to introduce himself like a 'mini-Dad'. His skin was white as well, but it was far from being as white as the baby's, and his hair was so blond that he could pass for a Swedish boy.

His face was all rumpled with disappointment, but when he reached to touch the baby's face, she grabbed his finger and opened her eyes. They were blue, like her mother's, but Mike didn't seem to notice. He was mesmerised by the baby, and even more when her lips turned up.

"She smiled at me!" He marvelled with delight, and though they smiled, both Raymond and Carla kept for themselves that it was simply a reflex smile and that it would a few months before she really smiled, "It's because she knows I'm her big brother and that I love her," He paraded, and he was rewarded by a kiss from Carla.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**17 years ago**

"Daddy! Help! Mike is trying to curse me!" Ana yelled, running to her father's arms as soon as he was in sight.

Raymond crouched and shielded her with his arms, making her giggle, and make Mike heave as he exclaimed that it wasn't fair. He was holding a stick that he probably renamed wand, and was out of breath, probably for running after his little sister. The young boy smiled at his father, and though Raymond tried to give him back his smile, his heart wasn't in it.

"Where is Car? She was supposed to come home," Mike inquired, looking at the front door behind Raymond, and being highly disappointed when he saw that there was only Eric behind his father.

"What's with the face, kid? Aren't you happy to see me?" Eric joked around, seeing the long face that his Godson was giving him, and Mike simply shrugged, hiding his emotions behind a blank face as he countered,

"I'd be happier if Car were home."

"Where is Mama?" Ana inquired from her father's arms, and he lifted her up, walking further into the house as he explained both his children,

"She is still at the doctor. She should come back home by the end of the week."

"And when she'll come back, I'll be a big sister, like Mike?" Ana asked with a bright smile, that tore Raymond's heart.

Carla had been six months pregnant when she had a miscarriage. The doctors had been unable to tell what caused it, giving the excuse that sometimes, babies weren't strong enough and miscarriages were simply the way of life. And though Raymond kept his cool in front of his wife, he was far from pleased with that answer.

Carla was now still at the hospital, unconsolable with Elena staying by her side whilst Raymond ought to spend some time with their children. And he was the one who had to break the news that whatever baby sibling they were supposed to have, will never cross that threshold.

"About that … I am afraid that I have some bad news, kids," Raymond said, sitting his daughter on the counter of the kitchen, and taking his son's hand in his.

He opened his mouth, but no word came out. He couldn't tell them when they had been expecting this arrival with even more eagerness than him. This was actually that he had noted over the years. He never had any problems putting thoughts into words, or getting rid of feelings when he was working, but as soon as it became personal, he would become a staggering mess. Moreover, Carla was always the one to handle strong news like that. She was the one who handled Santa for Mike, and who explained to Ana why she was not formed like her brother. Carla always had the right words, and Raymond simply followed suit, but this was something he had to do without her.

"Your sibling has gone to a better place, where he will be waiting for you to come and live with him when you get older," Eric said with a sympathetic tone, taking over on announcing the bad news to the kid.

Raymond frowned a little, because this notion of an afterlife was bound to bring the question of religion, and he knew for a fact that he was not ready for that matter without his wife. Ana and Mike turned their head to their Godfather, not sure they understood before Mike uttered with horror,

"The baby is _dead_?!" Then he turned his head to his father, anger colouring his juvenile features, "You said that it was nothing!"

"We thought it was nothing. But sometimes, life works in some mysterious ways," Eric defended his friend.

When they went to the hospital the day before, it was simply because Carla wasn't feeling so good, and that Raymond wanted to reassure by having a doctor telling her that everything was fine. Of course, he had never been so wrong in his life. It was probably one of those maternal instincts that warned Carla in a way Raymond couldn't fathom.

Raymond closed his eyes, grateful that his friend was here to help him in this moment of grief, for he knew he would have miserably failed to have the soft words Eric just had for the kids. He felt Ana kiss his cheek, and she told him with her sweet little voice, "It's okay, Daddy. Didn't you hear Uncle Eric? He said we will see our baby brother later on when we go to the better place too."

Raymond weakly smiled to his daughter who did not understand yet the finality of death, unlike her brother who was looking down on the floor, probably trying to conceal his emotions to the world. This was something that Raymond had noticed Mike would do more and more. He would do his best to keep his emotions to himself, putting an unreadable mask over his face.

Still, Mike walked to his father and hugged him. And in that simple embrace, Raymond knew that Mike understood the depth of the situation way more than Ana did. None of them said a word, silently comforting one another through their touch before Mike took his sister's hand and told her that he would read her a story.

A heavy silence fell on the roof after the children left, and Eric rested a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder, giving him reassuring words of hope, "You will get to try again, Raymond. Your family doesn't stop here, you still have many rooms to fill."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**15 years ago**

Life had lost all meaning. Raymond couldn't tell how many days he had spent in his room, locked up, and away from the world. All he could remember last doing was going to the coronary, a last spark of hope lit in him. Until the last second, he had hoped that the police was wrong and that it wasn't his wife that was laying in the morgue. But never he had been more wrong in his life.

He didn't even remember how he got home that day. All he remembered was seeing his wife on the metal bed, burnt, part of her hair gone, cloths gripping to the little of skin she still had. And then, everything went black. He assumed Eric took over from there, but he couldn't be sure.

The handle of his door wiggled a little, and Raymond snapped his head up, glaring at the door and whoever was trying to disturb his lonesome moment, before taking his head in his hands when he heard footsteps running away. He knew that it was probably Ana who tried to come into his room, like every day since the dreadful day the news was announced.

But Ana was the last person he wanted to see at this moment. In truth, he did not want to see anyone. He was vegetating in his bed, trying to catch the last scent of Carla in her pillow. He hadn't moved from this room ever since the morgue, and though he knew he should, he wasn't planning on doing anything to change the state he was in.

He did not even go to his wife's funeral, dreading what it meant. Seeing her last resting place gave a finality that he was not ready to deal with. And worse, it gave a closure he did not want. All he wanted was his wife back in his arms, for her to be by his side as they raised their children, for her to be the supporting and loving person she had always been. Not for her to lay six feet underground.

He was torn out of his depressing thoughts by the window being open, and his son climbed in his room. Though he was only eleven, Mike had developed a stealth that Carla had encouraged by enrolling him into climbing lessons. And despite his young age, Raymond had started to let Mike know bit by bit what really made his fortune. Robinson Inc' was something that he planned on leaving the majority to the Kavanagh children. And though his own children would have a small share in the company, Raymond intended for them to take over Idris when the time would come.

Mike watched his father, before taking a water bottle from his messenger bag, as well as a sandwich. He gave them to Raymond, sitting on the edge of the bed, and blankly looking at the empty space where Carla used to sleep. For a moment, the two of them stayed silent, before Mike said with a small voice,

"I'm sorry, Dad. I know how much you loved her."

Raymond didn't reply anything, his heartbreaking at the past tense his son used. Mike adored Carla, that was the one thing that never changed over the years. The two of them had a very chummy relationship that grew over the years, and hearing how Mike who thought the world of Carla, using past tense to describe her was a stab in the heart for Raymond. He was not ready for that, and he doubted that he ever would.

Mike reached for his father and gave him a hug, probably to ease the man's pain. Raymond staid stoic, fighting against his tears, and against his guilt. He was supposed to comfort his son, not the other way around. After a moment, Mike broke their embrace, and walked to the window, telling his father, "Aunt Elena said she's taking Ana to the doctor tomorrow. I thought you should know."

Raymond blinked a little, his paternal instincts taking over his sorrow, and he asked with a crooked voice, "Why?"

"Well … she isn't doing so good. She … lost a lot of weight, and she has nightmares every night. Elena says that maybe the doctor will prescribe sleeping pills," Mike said, avoiding his father's eyes. And though Raymond knew that there was something Mike wasn't telling him, he couldn't bring himself to ask what it was.

So he simply dismissed his son, "Thank you, son. For telling me, and for the sandwich."

Mike left through the window, leaving Raymond alone once again with his dark thoughts, the guilt of failing his children being added to his sorrow. What Mike had spared Raymond from was that he and Ana needed their father and that it was hard for them as well. But even knowing that, Raymond couldn't pass the fact that he missed his wife dearly, and that he would give anything for five more minutes with her.

And this was how he reentered that vicious game he had played ever since policemen had told him that his wife had been burnt alive. _What if_? What if he had gone with her, instead of staying with Ana and Mike? What if he had asked her to stay, given the fact that she was supposed to see the doctor the next day? What if he had sent Eric to escort her? What if he had not refused to host the event she went to? What if?

This was a vicious game, where all the answers were always delusions meant to hurt more than healing once he would get back to reality, but like an addict to morphine, he kept asking himself those questions, revelling in the little pleasure they gave him when he would summon a perfect scenario in which Carla would still be alive and kicking.

Suddenly, the door barged open, revealing Eric who looked down on his oldest friend with all his might. "It's been two weeks, Raymond! Pull yourself together!"

He stomped to the bed, and tore the covers away, before pulling up the curtains, making Raymond recoil from the sudden light.

"The business is dying, with you hiding here like a wounded animal!" He accused.

"I don't care. Let them take it over."

Eric glared at Raymond, disappointment on his face as he leaned so his face would be to Raymond's face, "And what about your _children_, Raymond?"

"My children don't need me, they need their _mother_!" Raymond spat back, getting angry against his friend for bothering his lonesome quiet.

Eric's gaze flared, his temper rising, "Do you know what is happening behind your closed door of self-pity? Your _eleven years old son_ is calling all the shots! Everything that happened in this house is run by an eleven years old! He is forced to do exactly what you wanted to avoid for your children!"

Raymond looked down in shame, but Eric did not let it go at that and kept on antagonising the mourning man, "You have left your children to fend for themselves! They can't mourn properly, because it feels like they are losing more than a mother, they are also losing their father! And this forcing Mike to become a father to his little sister! Did you know that Ana refused to eat ever since the funeral? Did you know that she has night terrors and that Mike is the one to calm her down every night? Did you know that Mike got into more fights at school over the past couple of weeks than in his entire life? In order to protect his little sister! This isn't the childhood you wanted for your children, Raymond!

I came here and found Ana crying in the lounge-room because you refuse to see her. You keep your door close to your own daughter!"

Raymond shook his head, finally admitting to his friend what he didn't want to admit to himself, "I _can't_ Eric. I can't look at her, and …" His voice broke, unable to finish the words.

He loved his daughter more than life itself, but despite her only being five, she was the spitting image of her mother. And looking at her, only reminded Raymond of the person he lost. How was he supposed to look past that? How was he supposed to only see his daughter, when the more she would grow up, the more she would look like her mother?

Eric sat on the edge on the bed and put a friendly hand on the man who had become like a brother to him as he told him with a soothing voice, "I know it hurts, Raymond. I know it looks like life has ended. But once you told me something. When you become a parent, you put your child first. Your children need you, now. No matter how much it hurts, no matter how you feel, your children need you. So it is time for you to put your children first, or so help me, I will take them out of this house, and you will never see them again!"

On those words, Eric got up and left Raymond to reflect on their conversation.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**13 years ago**

Raymond and Eric came home later than supposed to and found the house silent, which did not come as a surprise. It was past midnight, and the nanny had probably put the children to bed since long ago. Especially since Ana had to take her pills at a specific time. Her night terrors hadn't stopped, so the doctor had prescribed her sleeping pills, to numb away the nightmares. A few times, they tried to cut down on the drug, but the nightmares came back right away. Ana didn't like taking the pills. First of all, they were pills, and she would say that her throat was too little to take it. second, it would leave her groggy in the morning for a good hour and sometimes give her headaches.

Eric went to the kitchen to pour himself a drink, and Raymond went to his children to check on them. Mike wasn't in his room, but this was nothing out of the ordinary. Mike seemed to suffer the same affliction as Raymond when it came to saying no to Ana, and Ana often asked to sleep with her brother. So he had no doubts that he would find his son in his daughter's bed. But when he checked on Ana, he only found the brunette sleeping peacefully. He properly tucked her in, before checking the TV-room, to see if Mike hadn't snuck out there to play some video games.

But when Mike still remained missing, Raymond's heart suddenly stopped beating, bile rising in his throat. He went back to his son's room, looking for a sign of infraction before he stormed to his office to call security. But there he found Mike, sitting on his chair and waiting for him, aiming a gun at him.

Relief washed through Raymond, though he rose an eyebrow at his son when he did not lower the weapon upon seeing his father's face. Raymond had started training Mike with shooting practice, a couple of years ago, and Mike turned out to be very good with a gun. He rarely missed his target, moving or not; and Raymond discovered that Mike liked the feeling that holding a deadly weapon in his hands would procure him.

Still, that did not explain why he would point a Smith & Wesson to his father's head.

"It's your fault," Mike hissed, with an obvious pain lingering in his voice. "_Car is dead because of you_!"

Raymond glanced at the file that was open on the desk, the one proving that the fire in which Carla was dead was arson and that the people involved in that arson were people trying to get back to Raymond. And though Raymond had felt that way for a long time, he did not move or try to dissuade his son for taking the shot.

He remained impassible, watching his son dead in the eye, as Mike was fighting back tears and accused his father, "I lost the most important woman of my life because of your recklessness! Ana lost her mother because of _you_!"

Mike repressed a sob, repositioning his hand properly so his aim would be true. Raymond had started training him to look into people's past and explained to him how people often kept their darkest secrets close to them. He taught his son how owning a man's secret, was like owning a man; and it seemed that Mike had learnt his lesson well, and broke into his father's office to learn about his deepest secret.

"You don't even deny it! You have the guts to laugh with us when you know Car is dead because of who you are! You might have as well burned her yourself!" Mike spat, gritting his teeth, and securing properly his gun in his hand.

Raymond didn't know why he didn't try to reason his son or at least tried to talk him out of ending his life. Maybe because a part of him hoped that Mike would pull the trigger, for he had never stopped feeling guilty over his wife's death. Or maybe because he felt that he deserved it. Or maybe again, because he felt like Mike wouldn't go as far as to kill him. And he would never know, as Eric appeared in the room behind him, taking the situation in the blink of an eye.

"Mike," He said with a warning. "Lower the gun."

"He killed Car!" Mike cried out, his eyes never wavering from his target as his hands were steadily holding his gun. Eric swiftly glanced at Raymond, slightly frowning when he saw that his friend had not even tried to get himself out of this predicament.

"Your father loved Carla, Mike. Be reasonable. It is written black on white that it was Jackson, and we took care of him. Now put that gun down."

"Why? Car deserves justice! If he wasn't that mobster, Car would still be here with me!"

"Mike …. You don't want to kill your father," Eric declared with a soft soothing voice, sure that his words were true. Mike, on the other hand, seemed to take that statement as a challenge,

"Oh no? Watch me!"

"No, you don't. You can't do that to your sister." This had the merit to make him flinch, and shift his gaze from Raymond to Eric. "You can't do that to her. She already lost her mother, don't make her lose her father, and her brother as well."

"She won't lose me. I'll always be there for her," Mike strongly stated, and Eric shook his head as he pointed out the truth of what might happen,

"If you kill Raymond, you will get arrested. Jail isn't a place for Ana, even if it is to pay you a visit."

"You'd let the cops take me to jail, Uncle Eric."

"I don't know what I would do, Mike. But this is my brother at heart you have at gunpoint. _Your_ father. Ana's father. Can you live with taking away this particular life?"

Mike finally lowered his gun, Eric's words taking roots in his brain. For a moment, the room was still, until Mike hung his head low, and got up from the chair. When he passed in front of his father, he stood next to him for a moment, before his voice filled with venom, he declared,

"I won't break Ana's image of a perfect father. But that does not mean that I'm forgiving you."

He left the room, and Eric followed, leaving Raymond alone for a moment. He walked to his desk, and checked the file, reading over this file that he knew by heart, before folding it and putting it back in its drawer.

"He'll forgive you," Eric knowingly said, putting a drink in front of Raymond.

Raymond shook his head, sitting on his chair as he took his glass and brought it to his lips. "Why should he? I don't forgive myself."

"He has a reason to. He loves you more than you love yourself."

Raymond rose an eyebrow at his long-time friend, subtly reminding him that not even five minutes earlier, his own son had a gun pointed. Eric chuckled, apparently barely moved by the commotion and reminded Raymond,

"_That_ was because he loved Carla more than he loved you. It's always been true, and no matter how many years will pass, it will remain. He adored her. But still, he loves you more than you give him credit for. Just give him time to cool down."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**10 years ago**

‼️** (This is the only part Christian learns about) **‼️

After a long week away from home, Raymond got back to his family, already anticipating the next day. Ana has been hovering over the phone all past week to organise Mike's sixteenth birthday. She was very excited about it and had called her father every two minutes to get him to buy yet another thing to make the birthday even more perfect.

Mike, on the other hand, wasn't that thrilled about getting older. But Raymond put this on him entering in his moody phase of being a teenager. The only thing he was really forward to was that he would get to pass his driving licence, and freely drive around, despite his father's protectiveness. This had actually been an epic fight that the two men often breached, with Mike asking Raymond to cut him some slack.

After that night when Mike accused his father of Carla's death, Raymond had trained him even more to take over, and as Eric predicted, Mike forgave his father. Sure he never said the words out loud, but it was obvious that he did. In fact, the only time they had another argument, was when Raymond declared that it was time to form Ana as well and that Mike firmly opposed at the idea. He wanted to keep his sister's innocence and fought Raymond every step of the way, and eventually, Raymond folded and kept his criminal world a secret from his youngest child.

As his ritual, Raymond checked on his children, expecting to surprise Mike, since he was home earlier than planned (thanks to Ana's unstoppable supplications), but his son was not in his bedroom. Raymond didn't let it startle him and simply went to Ana's room, sure to find Mike there, watching over his baby sister. He clearly did not expect to see the view that came to him when he entered her room.

For a mere second, he remained frozen, his heart not believing what his eyes were seeing; before blinding rage took over him. In the blink of an eye, he was by the bed, pulling Michael out of his daughter's bed, and taking him out of her room. As soon as they were in the corridor, he pinned the young man against the wall, his fingers closing dangerously around his trachea.

"What is wrong with you?!" He roared, anger sipping from every single one of his pore. Mike struggled against him, and managed to say between two hallowed breaths,

"It's not what you think! I never touched her!"

"But you jerk yourself while watching her sleep?! What is wrong with you?!" He hurled, kicking the young man's head against the wall. Michael hissed, but Raymond could not care less. His fingers pressed a little tighter the fragile throat between them, when a flash came to Raymond, making him realise that it was his son in front of him, not just some stranger.

He let go of Michael, taking a step back, out of breath. Michael coughed a little, massaging his throat before gathering himself up as best as he could.

"Explain yourself!" Raymond demanded. Michael looked in his eyes, fear playing in the green depth of his own as he stuttered,

"You wouldn't understand. We're meant to be, and I … needed to release tension."

"She's your _sister_! She's _ten_!" Raymond exclaimed, not believing his ears, while his insides froze. How many times did he find Mike sleeping next to Ana? What if this ever went further than what he saw? "You're never going to be alone with her," He darkly declared, ready to ship Michael to the edge of the world, to protect his daughter from his perverted mind.

"No! You took Car away from me, you're not taking Ana! She and I are meant to end up together, and there is nothing you can do that will stop me from seeing her!"

Raymond wasn't sure what happened. He couldn't tell what nerve broke to make him act on such raw instinct, when he had always been master of his body, in perfect control of his emotions. All he knew, it was that as soon as those words left Michael's lips, Raymond snapped his neck and made sure that Ana would forever be safe from his perverted delusions.

For the longest time, he stared at his son's dead body, wondering what went wrong for him to think in such a deranged way. But he couldn't understand. Even if he tried to rationalise, and think that Michael's infatuation fro Carla transferred to Ana, it still did not explain how he could think like that of his _ten years old sister_. Sure, Ana was early for her age, but she was still a child.

With a shake of his head, he moved the body to the next room and called Eric for him to come right away. then, he went to his cellar and took the whiskey that he had reserved for Michael's wedding, and poured himself a glass waiting for Eric. Eric arrived half an hour later, finding his best friend in the room where Michael's body was laying on the floor.

"_What happened_?!" Eric marvelled, rushing to Michael's side to check his pulp, but refraining when he saw the natural position of his neck.

"I found him in Ana's bed."

"So? He's always in Ana's bed," Eric pointed out, reminding Raymond of how blind he had been all along. He poured himself another glass, and eluded the question by saying,

"I want you to make an appointment for Ana tomorrow. I want the doctor to check if everything is … in order."

Eric gasped of understanding, looking back at Michael laying on the floor. They remained silent for a moment, before Eric murmured, in a dead voice, "Raymond … you killed your son."

"_I know_," Raymond said with a defeated tone, downing yet another glass of whiskey. He watched Eric get up and start to pace, probably trying to figure out the situation, whereas Raymond already had everything figured out.

"What are you going to tell Ana!?"

"I don't see what you're talking about. Mike ran away, and I am out to find him," Raymond lightly said, as if this was the most normal thing in the world. Eric shook his head, refusing to take part in this masquerade,

"Raymond this is _Mike_! This isn't she low life guy who owes you money!"

"And don't you think I know that?!" Raymond snapped with anger, clutching his empty glass in his hand. "I didn't mean to. I just saw red. I … He was … _His sister_, Eric! How many times did we find them in each other's bed?! And all along, he was …" He broke down, unable to finish his sentence.

He wished he could forget all of this, and go back to the peaceful family life he had a few hours ago, only worried of being dragged by his daughter from shop to shop to create the perfect birthday present for her brother.

Eric rested his hand on Raymond's shoulder, comforting him, before he let him know, "Stay with your daughter, tomorrow. I'll get rid of his body."

"_No_! I can't face Ana without clearing my head first. I'll do it, just take care of my daughter while I'm gone

. **.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

**8 years ago**

**Christian knows nothing of this!**

It had been two years since Mike's 'disappearance', and everyone bought it so far. The only people who really knew what happened were Eric and Raymond and though Raymond knew that some people had their doubts about the fact that Michael 'ran away', everyone went along with this official story. The only person who refused to talk about it was Elena, but Raymond knew that it had more to do with the fact that she could sense that the two men were hiding something from her, rather than from the fact that Michael was missing. But he couldn't bring himself to tell her how much he had failed as a parent. Because no matter how much he thought about it, the fault always fell back to him, and he couldn't help but think that he had missed something crucial as a parent for Michael to develop such urges over his sister.

Ana rarely brought up Michael, even though Raymond could tell that she was hurting over the fact that her 'brother had abandoned her'. But he still felt that it was better for her to think that her brother betrayed her and fled, rather than to know what atrocity he tried to commit. Moreover, Raymond figured that Ana had learned her lesson over Carla, and knew better than to ask questions and be faced to a wall. Raymond had never been able to bring himself to talk about his late wife to his daughter, even less after that night when Michael learnt the truth. He had seen pure hatred in the young man's eyes while he was holding him at gunpoint, and he knew he wouldn't bear to see the same expression on his sweet daughter's face.

The only person who asked questions about Michael was Elena, and every time, Raymond did his best to elude her. He was grateful that she never asked Eric, probably thinking that this was an issue that ought to be resolved with Raymond as a parent.

The two of them were actually sitting at The Mile High, drinking some rosé wine whilst waiting for Eric, and talking about mundanities. Eric finally arrived, and Raymond immediately knew that something was wrong. She barely gave their friend the time to sit, that she was already grilling him,

"What did the doctor say?"

Raymond furrowed his brows, not liking hearing those particular words. For as long as he had known Eric, he had been anti-doctor, and every time he went to one, it always ended with bad news. The last one being the doctor telling him that he was sterile. Raymond hadn't even known that Eric was feeling bad enough to go see the doctor.

Eric smiled, trying to elude the question, but Raymond was even less patient than Elena, "Cut the crap! What did he say?"

"How about we order first?"

"Food is already on its way. We're having the special. Now, why are you going to the doc in the first place?"

Eric cleared his throat, sitting properly in his chair before he looked dead in his friends' eyes, "I think we should come clean about some things between us before it's too late."

Elena gasped, bringing one hand to her mouth, and her other to her friend's, squeezing it with sympathy. Raymond, on the other hand, went on denial, and pulled his phone out of his pocket, "Whatever that was, I'm sure there is a cure. There is this German doc—"

"It's cancer. And it's not one that gets cured, Raymond. No matter how much money and power you have."

Eric seemed resigned in his fate, and no matter what either of his friends told him seemed to make him change his mind. He wanted to avoid disintegrating himself in front of his godchildren and certainly didn't want his last image for them to be one of a pitiful man. During the whole meal, Elena tried to reason him and send him to the best doctors in the world, but Eric being Eric, did not want to go see any other doctor than the one that gave him six months, to a year to live.

When dessert came, Eric cleared once again his throat and said, "I think this is time we clear some things between you two. I don't want to go with this on my conscience. I want you two to be a team when I leave."

"Eric," Raymond growled, with a warning tone.

"No, Raymond. You can keep it from every single person in this world, but you need someone else to know and you know that no one better than Elena will have your back as I do."

Elena expectantly looked at him, perfectly were of what the topic was, and Raymond glared at his friend. This was something he wished he would never have to do, but as usual, Eric was right. He needed to tell Elena, he _owed to_ her. She was his oldest friend aside Eric, and she always had his best interests at heart.

"I made Mike disappear. He never ran away, nor even thought of it."

"Why would you — Did he do something to Ana?" Elena asked, putting two and two together. In a way, Raymond wasn't surprised that figured it out so quickly. Something far worse had happened to her, after all. She was always prone to expect the worst in those cases.

Her eyes filled with compassion, a compassion that Eric would never understand. She understood the mixed emotions that Raymond had. The betrayal over his son's actions. The fear for his daughter's future. The guilt of feeling like a parent that failed. And this complicated feeling between pride and acerbity of doing the right thing of protecting one kid, at the expense of the other.

"Ray … I am so sorry. For what he did, and for your loss," She let him know, taking his hand in hers. Raymond nodded in her direction, taking her sympathy and compassion, but not saying a word. She did not take it wrongly, she knew him, and knew that he was not someone who liked to display his emotions publicly. So she simply smiled to him, and took leave of her friends, telling them that she had to pick up her youngest child from school.

Once alone, the two men remained silent for a short moment, Raymond grateful to Eric for making him do the right thing once again. And suddenly, it hit him. What was he going to do without his friend? Eric had always been there for him, stopping him from going to far, being his little angel (and sometimes devil) on his shoulder. And it went further than on the personal matter, it went all the way to work. Raymond had always relied on Eric, and never even thought of running the business without his trusty underboss.

"You need to find a replacement," Eric said, reading Raymond's thoughts. "And I happen to have someone in mind."

"Ana isn't an option," Raymond snapped. If there was one thing he had to give Michael, it was his vehemence to keep Ana's innocence as long as possible when it came to the mob. After Michael's death, Eric had tried several times to convince Raymond to form her as his new heir, but Raymond strongly opposed the idea.

"I wasn't thinking of Ana. I was thinking of the street rat."

Raymond glowered, perfectly aware that Eric wasn't very fond of the young man. Eric nodded as he added, "We both know you took him in out of the goodness of your heart, and because he caught you at a moment of weakness. If it hadn't been for Mike's death a month earlier, you wouldn't even have looked at him twice."

Raymond didn't retort anything to that, perfectly aware that Eric's words were singing the truth. Still, he reminded of something important, "Christian doesn't like you. Didn't you tell me that you caught him following you with that FBI guy?"

"Whether he likes me or not is not important. What is, is the fact that he doesn't trust me. He has a natural inclination for mistrust, and you know how fundamental that is for the job. This is how you will know if he is fit to take over me or not. I will lead him to have real reasons to mistrust me, and you will get a single opportunity to test his loyalty, without revealing to him that he is being tested. If his loyalty is ensured, the rest you can form him on, on your own."

Raymond thought about the plan, liking where Eric was leading him. If it wasn't for a single problem, "Testing his loyalty … Eric, do you realise what this means?"

"It's a win-win for me, Raymond. I get to help you one last time, and I get to not die like a bitch. I want the last image that the kids will have of me, to be of someone healthy, not some old guy who can't even fight a disease."

Raymond shook his head. Though he completely understood his friend's point-of-view, he couldn't bring himself to bring the order that would ultimately bring him down.

"The kid is the ideal candidate, Raymond. He has all the predispositions to follow your footsteps, despite where he comes from." Raymond ticked at that, because Christian's biological family was bound to become a problem at some point, no matter how much the kid was desperate to have nothing to do with them.

Eric seemed to sense and understand his friend's hesitation, for he told him, "I thought this through and through on the way over. Actually, I thought about it ever since Mike died. You need a new heir, and we both know you won't pick Ana for Idris, though you will give her Robinson Inc'.

All you need to do is pick your timing right, and make it believable so he doesn't realise he's being tested. If he passes, I will be dead, and you will have an heir to form. I might even throw him a bone or two, just so you can see if he ever tries to use it against you. This is the best solution. Think about it, and you will see I am right."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**🎉Merry Christmas to you all!🎄**

**.**

**~ Gosh I was SO EXCITED for you to read this ****chapter! you have no idea! Please let me know what you thought of this chapter! So much is said here!**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What do you think of Raymond now? do you condone what he did to ****Mike?**

**💚What do you think Eric now?**

**💚 What did you think of Mike? Before the event, and after the event?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but this chapter doesn't have any answers. I am rather tired, and I will be back to answering reviews soon. Also, I will try to put ten chapters out there by the end of the year, but that's just a try. And THANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	28. Chapter 27: Moral Dilemma

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 27****: Moral Dilemma (4,9K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So, about the last chapter, know that Raymond comes from a life very different than ours (except if you are from a family of mobsters). I never claimed that he was a good guy in this story, actually, from the start, I stated that both he and Christian were mobsters who liked their position of power. This story is rated M for the lemons, but also for the world it is set in. You have to know that worse than this will happen. I do not condone the man, but I understand where he comes from. He is short-tempered, and I made a point on showing that with Elena's story. He goes after her uncle minutes after he sees that she is molested. Raymond protects those who are dear to him, and in his world, the best way to take care of a problem is a definite way: death. **

💚**Also, about the bone Eric threw to Christian, it is about Mike. Just before dying, Eric tried to 'save his life' by accusing Raymond to take care of Christian out of guilt for what he did to someone. And this is something that Christian had ignored until now. He did not care, because it did not bother him. And even now, he only cares for Ana's sake.**

💚** Now, about this chapter, I don't know why, but I rewrote it twice. The first take of this chapter was supposed to be Jose's point-of-view, and it was pretty great. Well, I think it was. But afterwards, I had this idea to add the Michigan conversation, and I don't like splitting point-of-view within a chapter, so I had to rewrite this whole chapter, and add a few things. I know it is definitely shorter than the previous one, but I had to stop where I stopped, for obvious reasons. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

For a long moment, Christian remained silent, trying to process what Raymond had just told him about himself. It wasn't that he was really surprised (he had been suspecting much ever since he couldn't find anything about Michael Steele), but hearing the words coming out of Raymond's mouth gave them a sense of inescapable reality. And finally, the gravity of the situation came down to him,

"_You killed your son_!"

Raymond did not peep a word, his gaze steady on Christian who still had a hard time believing what he just heard. It wasn't much that he had a problem with Raymond ending someone's life, but more with the fact that Raymond was a family man who killed his own son. There was something wrong in this equation. And what made it even worse to Christian was the fact that he knew he wouldn't have reacted this way if it wasn't for Ana.

If he were honest with himself, he had been bracing himself for that outcome, and it didn't really bother him. After all, one did not become a fierce mobster by handing flyers about unicorns and rainbows. But this whole affair didn't have anything to do with him, and everything to do with Ana. Christian was sure that had he not been in a relationship with Ana and Agent Taylor had given him this file, he would have laughed it off with Raymond. He wouldn't even have brought the same way he did, he would have probably gone more nonchalant about it.

But the thing was, he was with Ana. And more than his relationship with her, he gave her his word that he would look for her brother. Now, how was he supposed to tell her that she would never see him again because her father killed him years ago?

"What was wrong with having him institutionalised?" He accused, uselessly wishing that Raymond would have opted for that less drastic option where Ana could still see her brother well and alive.

"I protected my daughter,' Raymond retorted, his voice far calmer than Christian's, and his eyes still on the young man, intense and calculating.

"By killing your son! Don't you see how wrong this is?! How many times did you ramble to me that family is what matters most?" Christian snapped back as he started pacing, his mind unable to think of anything else than his boss's daughter.

Ana did not talk often about her brother, even after she asked Christian to look for him. But still, the few times she mentioned her sibling, Christian could tell how much she missed him, and how much she still cared for that person that had deserted her, even after all those years.

Raymond did not move from his chair, his gaze following Christian as he was going in circles in his office, and he lightly said, "Family _is_ what matters most. But this isn't something for you to worry. This is my burden, and I learnt to live with it. I know that this is something that will eat me until my dying breath, and I'm okay with it."

"No, you're not. Or you would have told your daughter long ago," Christian snorted before he could even think his words.

As soon as they escaped his mouth, he regretted them, though he kept his face unreadable. He kept on pacing, feeling Raymond's gaze on him intensify, and cursing himself for yet another split in front of Raymond. He knew it would appear as nothing to Raymond since he knew nothing of the relationship between him and Ana, but still, Christian didn't like feeling himself out of control, even for a few seconds.

"So, _Ana_ is the one who told you about Michael," Raymond muttered, a hint of amusement tinting his voice and making Christian stop his pacing to look straight into the man's brown eyes, as he replied with all the confidence in the world,

"This file comes from that FBI agent who thinks that sharing with me parts of your past, will make me bend his way."

For the next few seconds, they had a silent clash, during which Raymond was daring Christian to stay in his lie. And though Christian knew he was dangerously playing with words, he stayed on his positions, for he knew that he never denied Raymond's statement, and only omitted part of the truth.

"You mean to tell me, that Ana who knew her brother better than anyone and knew his passion for France, didn't try to try to find her brother whilst in Paris?" Raymond challenged, his eyebrow up whilst a small smirk crept on his face.

Christian did not let that destabilised him, keeping his features cool and composed, even though he knew that he had cornered himself at a dead-end. For a mere second, he wondered if Raymond had known all along about Ana and him, and simply waited the opportune moment to take the matter in his own hands. After all, they were alone in his office, and why else would Raymond tell him about his darkest secret?

"She may, or may not have asked for me to look for her brother," He declared, opting for once again a veiled sample of the truth. It wasn't much a lie, but it wasn't as straightforward as he usually was with Raymond.

For a brief moment, Christian thought that he saw sadness on his boss's face, but that was quickly replaced by Raymond's usual mask. The older man cleared his throat, leaning a bit on his office, which did not go unnoticed by Christian who was still waiting to see if his mentor would pull his gun.

"And now that you found out what happened to him?"

"She asked me to find him, not what happened to him," Christian said with a cold voice, though if he were honest with himself, he still didn't know what he would tell the brunette.

Raymond longly looked at him with that way that Christian disliked so much, for it made him feel bare in front of his boss, and finally, the kingpin said, "I buried him in Michigan, where his mother was from. Under the name of Peter Jackson."

Christian took in the information, perfectly aware that Raymond did not give this as a free ride. There was something else behind this, even though he could not see it yet.

"Now that you know where he is, what are you going to tell Ana?" Raymond questioned, and Christian could swear that he heard a quiver in Raymond's voice.

He longly stared in his boss's eyes, before ostensibly turning his back on him, and leaving his office, without saying a word.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

As Jose came into his house, Christian finally opened his eyes. He had been waiting for his friend to come home for most of the evening, and a good part of the afternoon. Christian actually rarely came to Jose's place. Not because it was in a bad part of town, but because he knew that Jose liked to be alone in that special place. It was the house that saw him rise from the dirt, and this was the reason why Jose never tried to move out, and actually bought the house when he had enough money.

When Jose came into his living room, he silently watched Christian, not saying a word and hiding his surprise of seeing his best friend in his house. Christian waited for the Hispanic man to come and sit next to him, but once he did, he wasn't sure anymore if he made the right choice to come to him.

"Did she break up with you," Jose asked when Christian had remained silent for over five minutes. Christian frowned, surprised that his friend had this particular trail of thoughts, and shook his head, clarifying,

"I just saw Raymond, and … for the first time in my life, I'm not sure of what to do."

Jose patiently waited for Christian to explain what he meant, but the thing was, Christian was not sure of what Jose already knew or not. He was treading on thin ice, and he did not want to pull Jose down with him if he were to fall.

"Earlier today, I had an FBI agent giving me a file. He's the one I told you about, and he probably thought that giving me information about a certain person would make me more lenient toward his cause. The name on the file was Michael."

Carefully, he studied Jose's reaction, and it became obvious to Christian that Jose had known for a long time that Ana used to have a brother. Christian could even tell that Jose had a fairly good idea of what happened to the young man.

"Why didn't you ever tell me about him?" Christian asked, and Jose shrugged, pouring himself some ice tea.

"First of all, it is not my place. This is all Steele business. Second, I never knew anything for sure. I know that Raymond had a son and that one day, that son 'ran away'. But I also saw Raymond drink from a whiskey of his son's birth year a few days after the kid's 'disappearance', and he never really looked for him. If Ana were to run away, she would be found within the hour. Same with his Godchildren."

Christian nodded, sure that if he had been in Jose's shoes, he would have put two and two together, and just like his friend, he would have kept it for himself. As Jose said, it was not his business.

"So? Why are you questioning yourself over this?" Jose asked, and Christian lowered a bit his head, so he could rest his forehead on his knuckles.

"I have known about Raymond having a son for quite a while. Since Paris. Where Ana asked me personally to find her brother …"

For a moment, Jose stayed quiet, understanding what Christian had been thinking about ever since Raymond dropped that bomb on him. Should he stay loyal to his boss, like he had been all these years, and keep the secret for himself, pretending that he hadn't been able to find Ana's brother? Or should he stay true to his word, and let Ana know the truth, crushing the remains of her family in the process?

"This was bound to happen, Christian," Jose finally said, making Christian snap his head up to glare at him. "It was. You are in a relationship with two people who want your loyalty, and you keep one of those relationships a secret. You were bound to find yourself in the middle at some point. And I don't think you came to me to advise you about what you should do. It is not whether you should tell Ana or not, it is about to whom your allegiance is stronger. Ana or Raymond."

As he realised that Jose was right, Christian got off the couch with temper and paced through the living room. It was a dead-end in both situations. If he told Ana, he was betraying Raymond and the trust the man had built in him over the past decade. If he withheld the truth from Ana, it was her trust that he was destroying, before he could even be built on a solid basis.

There was no easy way out of this one. It wasn't the same situation as with Eric and when Ana had asked about him. Christian naturally eluded the answer, and Ana had had the good sense not to push the issue. And in this particular situation, Christian did not feel like betraying one person or the other, since Raymond never said anything about it.

It was obvious for the young man that Raymond did not want his daughter to find out what really happened to her brother. Like he told Christian, he learnt to live with the guilt, and Christian highly suspected that Raymond felt like he was in the same situation that he has been with his wife. He was too afraid to lose his daughter's love to be straightforward about what happened. Even if he was only protecting her.

"If it can help you, I never told Ethan," Jose said, making Christian stop with his incessant pacing to look at him. "When things started to be a bit more than friendly between us, Ethan asked if I knew what really happened to Mike. Mike was his best friend growing up, and he found it suspicious that a man like Raymond couldn't find his missing son, especially with all the resources he has."

"So you lied to your partner?" Christian asked, rising an eyebrow, because the two of them were perfectly aware that this was not an option for him.

Christian did not like to lie to the people he personally interacted with. Even with people he did not consider as close friends like Mia and Ryan, he avoided to lie to the most. He often eluded, or omitted the truth. But that was different that a straight lie to someone's face. Especially when that someone was Ana.

"No. I said that I did not know what happened to Mike, because I don't. I used the grey line. I suspect, but Ethan doesn't need to know what I suspect, and maybe Ana doesn't either."

Christian had a dark chuckle, sitting back next to his friend and letting him know, "I am not like you, Jose. I know _exactly_ what happened to Michael Steele, and why."

"Don't tell me!" Jose precipitately said. Christian kept his lips sealed, understanding that the least Jose knew, the more he could deny anything concerning that situation.

"I just wish I hadn't given my word to Ana," Christian groaned out in frustration, throwing his head backwards.

"This never would have come up, if you had listened to me in the first place," Jose admonished, earning a death glare from Christian.

This was a recurring conversation between the two of them, and the more they talked about it, the more Jose warned Christian that there were ways to be hurt that did not involve physical pain. And each and every time Jose said those things, Christian stubbornly staid on his position, saying that he was fine as it was.

"I don't want to have this conversation again, Jose! My relationship with Ana is not the problem here. You don't want to go down that road with me," Christian warned, not in the mood to listen to yet another lecture from his friend. He knew that Jose meant well, and he had to admit that he had some very solid and compelling arguments. But … there was something preventing him to stop things with Ana, and pushed him to take things even further with her.

"This is just a small thing, Christian. But how are you going to feel, when Raymond orders you to ice someone who turns out to be one of her acquaintances. Or when Ana will ask something of you that goes against what Raymond taught you. If you want to keep that relationship with her, you have to come out of the closet. It is not healthy to have a secret relationship, to begin with."

"Aren't you being a bit hypocritical?" Christian asked with venom, annoyed that Jose always ended up being the voice of reason. Especially when he usually shut that voice down so easily, when it wasn't personified by his best friend.

Jose froze for a moment, realising that he wasn't as white of a sheep as he pretended to be, and stuttered, "It's … it's not the same. Ethan and I … we … it's not something that —"

"Don't you dare tell me that it won't last. We both know how you feel about that man, and we both know that, contrarily to me, you're the one who doesn't want to come out of the closet," Christian accused, though he immediately felt bad when he saw Jose's shoulders sink. He questioned him with a look, and Jose confessed,

"I think it is over between Ethan and I."

"Because of —"

"No. He thinks I'm having an affair with Mia. He saw me a couple of times with her after I cancelled on him, and he knows I spend most of my days with her. And since I can't really tell him what I do with her, he assumed the worst, sensing that I wasn't straightforward with him."

"But … you're _gay_. Why would Ethan even assume there is anything _sexual _between you and Mia?" Christian mused, baffled that _this_ would be the reason for a fallout between Ethan and Jose. Jose looked down on his joined hands, and breathed deeply through his nose,

"Because I never really came out as 'full-on gay'. I liked Ethan, and what happened happened, but I am not liking waving the colours everywhere I go. And several times, this conversation came back as to was I gay or not."

Christian remained silent, not sure of what to do or tell. Even though he had never seen Ethan with Jose, it was obvious to him that Jose loved the eldest Kavanagh child. From the few times that Jose talked about his love life, it had been obvious to Christian. But he also knew that there was something holding Jose back, and now, he suspected that it was this very thing that tore the couple apart.

"Maybe you should try to let him know why it is so hard for you to be as open as him about you being together," He suggested, hoping to say the right things. But Jose darkly chuckled, leaning against the couch and closing his eyes, as he cynically asked,

"Have you told Ana about your sordid past? Have you told her about the ups and downs that forged your characters?"

"Partially."

"Well, in that case, you're a lot braver than me. I don't want Ethan's pity. I can take anything but his pity. And I'd rather have him throw me out, than have him look down on me with pity."

Christian looked at his friend who had kept his face unreadable while saying those words, and he suddenly wondered what had happened to Jose in his past to make him who he was now. He had already questioned Jose several times about his past, but Jose always said that he'd rather not talk about it, and Christian respected that decision. He understood that there were parts of his life that Jose would rather forget about, no matter how difficult it was.

He himself had some memories he would rather forget, and that he hadn't shared with Ana. But he couldn't tell if it was because he didn't want to see pity in her eyes, or because she still did not ask the right questions. When he had told her about his last foster family, and how he parted with them, it had made him very uncomfortable to see her tear up about it. mostly, because he had dealt with it a long time ago, and because he felt this was not reason enough.

But when he thought back of that moment a few days later, he had to admit that there had been something more than discomfort. He had a sort of new-found pleasure on confiding to Ana, and having her feel for him, no matter how he was now detached to the situation.

"Maybe you won't see pity in his eyes. All Ethan needs is a proof that you trust him. Maybe you telling him about —"

"I didn't even tell _you_, Christian," Jose cut him off, clearly not ready to take this step in his relationship with the Kavanagh.

Christian understood, and backed off, though he made a mental note to bring this conversation back in a near future. With a loud heave, he got up, even more, confused than before he came to his friend, and he let the Hispanic man know,

"I won't be here for the next couple of days. I'm going to Michigan."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian stared at the tombstone, doing his best to ignore the little voice in his head that was telling him that he should have brought Ana with him, instead of telling her that he was leaving town for a couple of days. She didn't question him about his whereabouts, because she never did, and Christian kept for himself where he was actually going. Mostly because he did not know why he was doing it.

If he were honest with himself, a major part of him was glad that Raymond acted the way he did. The more he thought about it, the more anger he was building toward someone that he had never met, and would never meet. There was something twisted about Michael Steele, and no matter how Raymond had tried to rationalise his son's behaviour, by saying that Michael never grew out of his Oedipal complex and had transferred it to Ana for looking so much like her mother; Christian still thought that this was something unnatural.

And still, he couldn't condone Raymond's actions. Michael had been his son. Maybe Christian would have been more lenient and understanding if Raymond hadn't been the one to end Ana's brother's life. This was something that Christian had troubles dealing with, the fact that Raymond who was so overprotective about his daughter, and godchildren, took his son's life in the blink of an eye. sure, it was an impulse, but Michael was still his flesh and bones.

"Why did you tell me? You could have lied, I would have bought it," Christian suddenly said, sensing Raymond's gaze on him from a few feet away.

He heard Raymond walking to him until he was standing next to him. "You're probably one of the only person on this Earth who doesn't buy the lies he had been fed with, no matter how well crafted," Raymond uttered matter-of-factly. "Besides, you already knew before even asking me. Especially if you've been looking for him since Paris."

"Suspecting something is not the same thing as knowing something, and you know it," Christian coldly replied, avoiding on purpose the part where Ana had been mentioned.

Raymond stayed silent for a moment, looking at his son's tombstone as Christian pointed out, "You've been coming to Michigan every year ever since I worked for you. I never understood that particular movie, and never asked about it. I always assumed that it was a special date for you and your wife."

Once again, Raymond did not say a word, his eyes still on the tombstone dedicated to 'Peter Jackson'. Christian respected his silence, though he was curious as to whether it was because was at a loss of words, or if it was because Raymond was paying his respects to his son.

"What did you tell Ana?" He finally asked, making Christian frown. Raymond turned his head to him, and explained, "You said that she asked for you to find him, what did you tell her?"

"Nothing yet."

Raymond longly looked at Christian, before having a disabused smile and looking back at the grave. "You're looking at me with a whole different light."

"What does it have to do —"

"Had I ask you that question two days ago, you would have immediately told me that this did not concern you. But since you finally found something to judge me on, you're hesitant as to what you should do next."

Christian kept for himself what really made him feel hesitant, though it occurred to him that Raymond was far from wrong. He did see Raymond differently, making his mentor no longer that perfect highly praised figure above him.

"There is something that I don't understand …" Christian started, waiting for Raymond to give him a sign that Christian had his attention. "Why did you tell me? You could have told me to piss off, and I wouldn't have asked any more question. You kept this secret to yourself all those years, so why did you tell me?"

"To prepare you. So you would know the cost of being at the head of Idris. I have no doubts that had I been another man, with a regular job, I wouldn't have reacted the same way, and Ana would still have a brother as we speak. But being the man I am had its tolls on me. It made me less patient toward the issues that are close to my heart. It made me more prone to violence. It made me less regarding on what is wrong and right in society's eyes, and solely care about my own personal gains. I want you to know that being at the head of Idris isn't just a personal choice. It's a choice that will affect the family that you are so desperate to have."

As those words were said so nonchalantly, Christian felt a wave of anger wash through him, that seemed foreigner to him for it came at such a force. He had always been so in control of his emotions, that he was the first one shocked that he was having such a strong reaction, especially toward something that he had been kind of expecting.

"Who says I want to take over?" He strongly said, not doing one thing to hide his anger. "Who says I want to be at the head of Idris? You already have an heir, don't bring me into this."

"We both know that I won't bring Ana into this, and I know you're not stupid enough to think that I took you under my wings and trained you the way I did all these years, out of the goodness of my heart," Raymond snapped, though contrarily to Christian, he did not seem upset the least in the world by Christian's outburst.

Christian glared at the older man. "I don't want Idris. I don't want to replace you. I don't want to have this weight on my shoulders. Especially, if _this_ is the cost," He argued, pointing Michael's grave to prove his words. "I want a normal family, and I certainly don't want them to have to pay the price."

"If you want a normal family, Christian, you chose the wrong line of work. How will you justify to your wife your late-night calls? The occasional bruises? The random strangers showing up at your place? Normal family doesn't go with being a mobster, and you know it. You've been postponing your personal life because you know it is impossible for you to have this little fantasy of yours."

Christian did not retort, aware that Raymond was right. But that did not mean that he was ready to admit that to his face. His mentor rested a comforting hand on his shoulder, and told him,

"Because I always had a soft spot for you, I will give you this one opportunity. If you want out, then leave. There will be no repercussion, as long as you don't go sell me out to the first cop you see. If you want that white picket fence life so much, I will let you off the hook, and scar-free. Think about it well, and let me know when you come back home."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

**~ So ... Christian has an outing of this life ... and who knows, maybe this is his opportunity to date Ana officially. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What do you think of the conversation between Christian and Raymond? **

**💚What do you think MEthan and its downfall? And before you guys start jumping at her throat, Mia knows nothing of this. **

**💚 Do you think Christian will take Raymond on his offer? And do you think he will tell Ana about ****Mike? I'm curious at to your answer on this one**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but once again this section is closed. I don't feel so well, and I'm trying to update as much as possible. But I would still like to take the time to THANK YOU ALL for the response towrd the last chapter. I know many of you want to know about present Ray and if he knows about our sneaky couple, but that's not for now. Just know that a lot has been said during that chapter, read between the lines. Once again, T__HANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	29. Chapter 28: Reality Call Back

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 28****: Reality Call Back (3,1K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** Now, I want you to remember something that Christian has repeated many MANY times. he likes being a mobster! he likes it!**

**💚 Happy New Year. Hope all your dreams will come true**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Dream A Little Dream Of Me - Doris Day**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**A few texts**

**I am coming back tonight. Is there any chance that I might see you waiting for me at my place? Christian. **

**If you want to see me, you should just say it, instead of conjuring excuses of you coming back from yet another business trip **😜**. Ana **

**I was asking in an elegant and distinguished way. I thought you complained of me not being enough of a gentlemen to you … Christian **

**I did. But then you made a very valid point by saying that gentlemen were boring in bed. And I don't want you to become boring in bed! Ana **

**Don't worry, this is not something that is ever going to happen. Even crippled and sick, I would find a way to spice it up for you. Christian**

**That's thanks to your monster-cock! I think we should name it as the eighth wonder of this world **😏🍆** Ana **

**Your obsession over this part of my anatomy is getting worrying. Maybe you should consult about it … Christian **

**Here I am, making compliments, and here you are, trying to send me to the looney bin! I think I am not going to come tonight! Ana **

**To be honest, I really want to see you tonight. So if you don't come, I will wait for the dead of the night, and I will come to you myself. It's up to you … Christian **

**I was kidding, Christian! Don't come! I will be there waiting for you when you will get back. Though you know, there are other words than 'I really want to see you' that you can say … Ana **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian got back to his apartment, it was with no surprise that he found the light on, and heard music coming from the kitchen space. Without thinking about it a second more, he put down his bag and walked to the source of noise where he found Ana making crepes and humming to _Dream A Little Dream Of Me_. Bastille was on the counter, scrutinising for anything that might fall off so he could eat it, like he did when Christian cooked. He smiled to himself, and just when the lyrics called for it, he held her tight and whispered in her ear,

"I missed you."

Ana span to look at him, a bright smile on her face, before she tiptoed so she could kiss him. He returned her embrace, glad to have read her last text correctly and to have said the right words to her.

"I think you should go away more often," Ana said with a smug smile on her lips when they broke their kiss, making Christian shake his head at her, before looking at her preparation with an intrigued look.

She followed his gaze, and shrugged, "This is my first time cooking something that is not microwave oatmeal, so you better like!"

" I don't know. Did you put poison in it?" He joked. And just as to prove his point, her the sauce in the casserole bursted a bubble. Ana glared at him, putting her fists on her hips and threatened,

"You're going to sit at this table, you're going to eat what I put in your plate, and you're going to like it! Or I will never _ever_ try to cook for you again!"

Christian repressed a laugh, keeping for himself that he found Ana more cute than scary, but still did as told, and took place at the table. As he watched her finish her cooking, he started to wonder what would happen if he took Raymond up on his offer. So far, the fact to actually leave Idris did not occur to Christian. He loved being a mobster, and even more, he loved the power that being Raymond's protégé gave him. He loved the feeling of fear that he gave some people just by entering a room. He loved being in control of his life, and its surroundings. And most of all, he loved being above the law.

Sure there was this downside that Raymond had mentioned, this aftermath that was the fact that his family would be involved in his criminal life. But the more he thought about it, the more he thought that he could handle it. After all, Raymond had warned him of how dark it could get, and Christian was sure that he would never let himself fall that deep. He was sure that he would be able to make the difference between home and work.

But now that he was with Ana, a whole different scenario played before his eyes, with a whole different direction for his life. What if he put his Idris days behind him? Would he be able to date Ana out in the open? Would he be able to find a banal nine-to-five job? Would he be content to go back home at the same time every day, to talk about mundane things with his wife and kids?

And as he was asking himself about all these things, a whole other question formed in his head. Was Ana worth it? Sure he cared for her, and was very fond of her. But she was just a girl. Sure she was his first stable relationship, but that did not mean that he would build his life with her. Was he ready to antagonise Raymond in more ways than one, just for her? And though this question startled him, it was nothing compared to the answer that his brain immediately came up with.

"If you keep pretending I don't exist, I will get offended," Ana said, sitting next to him.

Christian shook his head a little, coming back to reality, and took his spoon, looking at the dish before him.

"I know how much Indian food is your favourite," She proudly said, putting her legs on his laps, like she always did when they ate together. Christian smiled and leaned to kiss her, though he warned her,

"To be honest, Mrs Parvati's is my favourite food. But that doesn't mean that I don't appreciate the thought."

Ana pouted a little, making Christian unable to stop himself from kissing her again, and they dug on their food. Ana was the first to express her surprise,

"I am a genius! This is my first dish, and we're not puking all over the place."

Christian nodded in confirmation. Though it wasn't as good as Mrs Parvati's, it wasn't as terrible as he thought it would be. There might be a bit too much spices, but it was edible and rather enjoyable. And most of all, Ana's pride made him unable to criticise anything about her cooking. Not even the overcooked rice.

As they ate, Ana told Christian of what she had been doing while he was away, mostly focussing on the wedding which was only a month away now. She was trying to concoct a surprise bachelorette party for Kate and was torn between doing it in vegas (for good measures), and going back to Orlando and the Harry Potter theme park.

She also complained of the upcoming gala that Clark Inc' was throwing the following week, like they did every year. In her opinion, the money spent to make rich businessmen feel better about themselves would be better served elsewhere. Like helping the homeless, or building schools in areas that needed it.

"You seem a bit off," She suddenly said, stopping her rant in the middle of it. Christian quizzed a little her calf, as he eluded,

"Just a lot on my mind."

Ana squinted her eyes at him, and when she opened her mouth to push the issue, he squeezed again her calf, in a reassuring way. So instead, she bounced, "Are you coming to the gala?"

But just as she asked this question, he asked himself, "Do you trust me, Ana?"

She opened widely her eyes to him as if surprised that he would even ask that question, and she answered the most naturally in the world, "Of course I do."

Christian shook his head, and insisted, "No. I mean, do you trust me to know what's best for you."

"I do. Or I wouldn't have taken your word for it, for Uncle Eric," She earnestly said, though her eyes showed curiosity.

Christian gave her a small smile and kissed her before he replied to her own question, "About your earlier question, I planned to go. Not that I had a choice, really. But if I go, I won't come alone."

"Coming alone to those events is a rookie mistake. People think that since you're unaccompanied, it means that you want to talk to them," She said, as if making conversation, but it was obvious by the way she was looking at Christian, that she was not ready to let go so easily about his own question.

He got up and took the dirty plates away from the table, and as he walked to the sink, he let her know, "I have several things to tell you, and I don't know where to begin."

A small silent followed those words, during which neither of them talked. Christian put the dirty dishes in the sink, and some water over them; and then he turned to look at Ana. She was staring at him, her face wary, but hard, and finally, she asked,

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"_What_? No! Where does that come from?!"

"Well, you absolutely want to see me, and your mood has been sullen all dinner long, and you want to talk about something. And … well … I feel you've been distant since you've come back," She enumerated, her blue eyes involuntarily filling with tears.

In the blink of an eye, Christian was by her side, and at a loss of words, he sweetly caressed her face and kissed her, hoping to reassure her through this simple gesture. Then, he took her in his arms, and sat them on the sofa, keeping Ana in his arms as he confessed,

"I haven't been fully honest with you. You asked me to find your brother, and … it has been several days since I've known about his last whereabouts …"

Ana looked at him with her eyes sparkling with hope. She smiled, at him and teased, "What? You think I will dump you once I get my brother back?"

Though he tried to at least smile for Ana's sake, Christian couldn't bring himself to do it; and Ana's smile immediately faded when she saw that his stern face remained the same, in spite of her joke. She looked down, and said with a sadness that broke Christian's heart,

"Or maybe you didn't say anything because you have bad news."

Christian did not affirm, though his silence confirmed what he could not say. Ana brought her knees to her chest, putting her chin on them as tears rolled down her cheeks. He soothingly rubbed circles on her smaller back, and let her silently cry over the loss of her brother. The tears kept on falling, when she asked between two hiccups,

"Do you even know how —"

Christian longly stared at her, puffy eyes and red nose, crying over someone who did not deserve her tears in his opinion. But she loved her brother. She didn't know how twisted and sick he was. And Christian couldn't see himself take that away from her. Especially not when it means that he would take her father away from her as well. He knew that Ana could be very forgiving and that she had forgiven him for Eric, but Christian doubted she would forgive her father for killing her brother. Even if she knew why.

And most importantly, no matter how shocked he was by Raymond's actions, he didn't see himself taking away from his mentor the thing that was most precious to him. Raymond loved his daughter more than life itself, and Christian doubted that he would survive to lose her. It seemed that Raymond still did not recover from his wife's death, and was holding his son's murder on his shoulders. Losing the love of his daughter would most likely kill him.

"From what I gathered, Michael got himself in a bad situation that got him killed," He said, doing his best to be vague, all the while avoiding to lie to her.

"What kind of situation?"

"You don't want to know, trust me."

He watched her swallow hard and wrapped his arms around her. She cried in the crook of his neck, mourning the loss of her brother. Christian caressed her back, not sure of what to say, once again, and hoping that never again he would have to console her from grief. He hated feeling so useless, and he hated, even more, feeling guilty over her tears.

He could have lied and pretended that he hadn't been able to find her brother, and he knew that he would have gotten away with it. But there was still the possibility of Ana taking matters in her own hands and hiring a private over it. And most importantly, Christian felt that this possibility wouldn't have helped her.

Even though the death of her brother was something hard to swallow, it was at least giving her a sense of closure. He understood why Raymond didn't do it and pretended that Michael ran away, it gave her hope that one day she might see again her brother. But Christian felt that the closure was better, no matter the pain at the present moment. Though at this precise moment, Christian wished he hadn't said anything and stayed in the shadow of Raymond's charade.

When Ana's sobs started to slow down a little, he picked her up and sat her on the sofa, before walking to his bag to retrieve from it what he had brought back from Michigan for her. She sniffled, looking at him with curiosity,

"I thought you would like to have something to remember him by," He told her, handing her the urn that contained part of Michael's bones, turned to ashes. He had stayed a day longer, to dig up Michael's grave and take his skull and a leg away from the coffin, in order to fill up the urn. That way, Ana could still mourn her brother, without having to go on his gravesite.

She took the recipient in her small hands, hiccuping. She was about to thank him, when she stopped herself, "I thought you were in Michigan."

"I was. This is where his mother was from. It must have held some sort of importance to him."

She nodded, looking down at the urn. Christian stayed crouched in front of her, waiting for her to say, or do something; and after a while, she sniffled and told him,

"Can we just go to bed?"

"Sure."

They got ready to bed, and once they were laying in each other's arms, Ana said, "Thank you for looking for my brother. Even if it's not the ending that I imagined."

"I didn't mind, Ana. What I mind is … breaking the news to you. I'm not the best to deliver that sort of news."

"But then again, no one is. Even doctors struggle with that."

Christian held her a bit closer, kissing the top of her head. For a moment, they remained silent, Ana tracing lines over Christian's bare chest when she suddenly lifted her head up and reminded Christian, "You said you had several things, to begin with …"

He kept his eyes closed, his fingers still mindlessly sliding over her skin, though all his senses were in alert, ready to analyse any reaction that she would have over what he planned to tell her.

"I … have this opportunity to stop working for your father, and I was wondering what would that mean for us."

Ana upped herself so she could look at Christian's face properly, in spite of the darkness, making him open his eyes to look into her blue ones.

"I don't want you to quit your job for me."

"And I didn't say I would. I just asked what would it mean for us if I no longer worked for your father."

"But you love your job."

"And you're avoiding the question," He retorted, getting a bit annoyed that she was going in circles, when all he wanted was a straight answer.

"You working with my father has little to do with us being … you know. I am just tired of him interfering in my dating life, and the fact that you're my longest relationship proves me right," She told him.

Still, Christian kept his impassible and pointed out, "'Little to do'?"

He watched Ana look down, her cheeks reddening a little, and he said her name, urging her to explain herself. "It's just that … well, you know. It's like dating your best friend's sister for you, and … well … forget it."

"So to be clear, I have to sneak out to be with you, because you think I would have a problem to tell your father about us?" Christian inquired, not sure how Ana could ever come up with this trail of thoughts. He didn't think that he had ever given her the impression that he was actually on board with this whole idea of concealing their relationship from Raymond.

"_No_! No. As I said, I just want to enjoy being with someone, without my father interfering, or my father being the third wheel. It's just … well …, I like being with you, … and I like the fact that it's just us when we are together."

Christian held her gaze, and though her tone was genuine, he was sure that Ana did not say everything that was on her heart. But he refrained from pushing it further, seeing that she was uncomfortable speaking of the complexity of their relationship. He caressed her cheek, and let her know as he closed back his eyes,

"Anyway, I just wanted your opinion on the matter. My mind is already made up, but I wanted to know where _we_ stood."

"Well, as long as we are a 'we', I think it's a pretty good start," She responded, putting her head back on his torso. And as Bastille climbed up to sleep at their feet, it occurred to Christian that he couldn't agree more.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**A little text **

**(The next day, in the afternoon)**

**I told Ana that her brother got killed for getting himself in a bad situation. She did not ask questions, and I don't think she will. Christian **

**Thank you. Raymond **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**‼️Next chapter will be another character's ****point-of-view. If you guess who, you'll get a special treat ****‼️**

**.**

**~ So ... Christian did not tell everything about Mike's death to ****Ana. like he said, he doesn't want to take her father away from her. but he wants to give her closure. plus, he knows Raymond wouldn't bear Ana hating him. which is why that last text and that simple thank you from Raymond means more than thank you. it's about thanking him for keeping his secret. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What do you think of the way Christian handled the Mike death to Ana? And the urn?**

**💚What do you think Christian will do about being a mobster or not?**

**💚 Do you think Ana will ever find out**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but once again this section is closed. I don't feel so well, and I'm trying to update as much as possible. But I would still like to take the time to THANK YOU ALL for the response towrd the last chapter. I know many of you want to know about present Ray and if he knows about our sneaky couple, but that's not for now. Just know that a lot has been said during that chapter, read between the lines. Once again, T__HANK YOU so much to all of you for taking the time to read the story, for following it and for reviewing it. You have no idea what it means to me._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	30. Chapter 29: Cinderella: Behind The Scene

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 29****: Cinderella: Behind The Scenes (5,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚**So this chapter is bigger than expected … 3 times bigger. Sorry …. But it flowed …**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Mia's PoV**

Mia looked at her reflection in the mirror, trying to recognise herself behind the makeup, but she barely could, Elena's personal shopper and makeup artist had done wonders on her. She had told the older woman that Christian had asked her to come with him to an event of some sort, and now more than ever, Elena Kavanagh felt like a fairy Godmother to Mia.

Sure, Mia knew how to do her makeup and hair by her own, but having a professional take care of that for her made her feel ten times better as she watched herself in the mirror. There wasn't actually much that had been done to her hair and face, but it still seemed that all her best attributes had been brought to light. When she used to work for Tonya, her pimp, makeup had always been about hiding one's flaw and put on a face that wasn't real.

Here, her high cheekbones had been enlightened, her light blue eyes popped thanks to long lashes and a subtle cat-eye, her lips seemed plumper thanks to a deep red lipstick.

Once again, she twirled on herself, watching her dress swirl on her looking glass and smiling of delight. The dress was sparkling green, with string straps attached to the bustier, and a flowing skirt that covered her legs all the way down to her ankles. She felt that without being too sober, the dress was classy enough, and she really liked it. Elena's personal shopper had been right, it did suit her skin tone.

As she was gathering her slightly wavy hair to the right side of her face, someone knocked at the door, and she went to open Christian with a bright smile plastered on her face. The copper-haired man looked at her from head to toe, appreciating her outfit, and she let him in whilst she took her coat out.

"Thanks again for coming with me. You have no idea how much you're going to be a life-saviour to me," Christian called out, making her smirk when she came back to him.

"If I keep doing you favours like that, you're the one who will end up in debt to me," She joked, making him chuckle slightly and shake his head.

Every time Christian had gone away overnight or more, he had asked Mia if she minded going up to his place and put food on his cat's plate. Of course, she didn't mind, though she had to admit she was surprised to learn that Christian was a cat person. Cat that she still hadn't seen, or at least petted. She did saw a ball of orange hair swiftly pass through a couple of times, but the cat never stayed to be caressed.

The two of them took the lift down to the parking lot, and once in Christian's car, Mia checked her phone with anxiety. Not much because she was expecting a text from someone (she actually had some troubles mingling with people in her class), but because she still did not receive the notification that her professor had received her paper. It was due for the same night, and she was anxious that the mail didn't get through.

"You seem nervous," Christian noticed nonchalantly, and Mia shoved back her phone in her purse.

"School things. I am doing you a solid, here. Why didn't you ask your girlfriend to come?" She asked. Though Christian asked and never forced her to come, she still had tons of papers to write, or at least read. But she accepted to help out Christian because, in spite of them becoming friends, she had to admit that she needed a night off.

"I don't mix pleasure with business," Christian said, with the same blank tone he always used when said girlfriend was mentioned.

Out of all the new people in Mia's life, Christian was her favourite person. Sure there were things she could talk about only with Elena and Jose, because Christian wouldn't be able to relate, or would only feel bad for her and awkward, but Christian was the only one to treat her … normally. He was blunt with her when he wanted to, he didn't treat her as someone fragile with whom some topics should be avoided, and most of all, he looked at her genuinely. There was no pity or understanding compassion in his eyes, he simply looked at her, like he would look at any other human being.

After their dinner at Mrs Parvati's, Christian was the one who made the effort to keep in touch. He would sometimes drop unexpectedly with food, tearing her away from her studies for a couple of hours. And just like she originally told him, they were learning to know each other. Christian seemed genuinely interested in her struggles to keep up with her first year of law school, and it was the same for her concern about his girlfriend. Though, if she were honest, the more the girlfriend was mentioned, the more curious Mia got. Christian never gave her a name or even a description, and it seemed that their meet up would be rather sparse and impromptu.

"Does she know that you're taking me to that gala thing, instead of her?" Mia insisted, worried that a simple misunderstanding could come between the odd couple that was Christian and his girlfriend.

She turned her head to look at him, and there was the ghost of a smile on his lips. It barely lasted a second before he regained his usual unreadable face and told her, "She does, and she does not care."

Mia nodded, putting this information in the little box she had in her mind concerning Christian's girlfriend. She had labelled it Jenna because she felt that this was a name that would suit Christian's girl. A sweet little Jenna, all delicate and loving that would balance with Christian's cold demeanour. She imagined Jenna to be the perfect homemaker, and always smiling and to share Christian's passion for tea.

"So about this gala …" Christian started, taking a turn. "It is a company thing. With Robinson Inc'. There will be many businessmen, and not all of them know about my side activities."

She repressed a smile, though she was glad that Christian trusted her enough to be that forward with her. After all, he could have lied to her from the beginning, and hide from her the illegal side of certain of his 'activities'. Especially knowing that she was studying to apply the law. Though he never said those words per se, it was as if he trusted Mia enough to keep for herself what she knew of Christian.

"I know how to keep quiet, Christian. I have been doing it for years," She reassured him, which made him glance at her for a brief second. She could tell what he was thinking, and so she quickly added, "I mean, I know how to play around the truth. It's what will make me a great lawyer."

She earned a slight chuckle from Christian as he pulled over a fancy hotel. The two got out of the car before it was driven away by a valet, and as Christian walked her inside the building, she pondered on the fact that she never heard a genuine laugh from him. He would sometimes chuckle or snicker, but she never heard him laugh from the bottom of his heart. She actually doubted that she even ever saw him smile of genuine happiness.

Christian was too strict for his own good, and Mia promised herself to teach him to loosen up a bit. This was what friends did, after all. They brought the best out of the other.

After giving their coats to the reception, Christian and Mia entered what she assumed to be a ballroom, and she suddenly felt ridiculously out of place. Maybe she was wearing a fancy dress, and was standing next to a powerful man, but who was she going to fool? She did not belong in the elite society, especially with her background. She clung to Christian's arms, a part of her relieved that Christian was not a socialite either and had admired to asking her so he could get out of having to socialise.

Still, as the man walked them to a specific group of people, she noticed that no matter what, he seemed to fit in. Maybe it was because he was handsome, to begin with, or maybe it was this aura that emanated from him. A mix of power and fear that came from him and inspired respect. And as she thought about it, it occurred to Mia that, to someone who did not know Christian, he was scary.

His face was always closed and cold, barely showing any basic human emotions. His stature intimidated due to his abnormal height, and his imposing built. And even in the way he dressed. Mia never saw Christian out of a suit, which gave this impression that he was always about business, and never let loose, not even for a pair of jeans.

But even though that realisation dawned on her, she did not care, nor even feared Christian. He was her friend. He was the guy who had a little kitten for a pet. The guy who would always remember to bring her mango juice when he would bring food because he knew it was her favourite. The guy who was genuinely interested in her life, successes and failures mixed.

As they passed a group of businessmen and their wives, Mia recognised one of them as one of her former regular, and she quickly looked away when his eyes fell on her. This had definitely not been a good idea for her to come, which she let Christian know in a faint whisper,

"Maybe I should have stayed home and study."

Christian looked down at her, his eyes confused for a second, before he ostensibly put his hand on her shoulder, and leaned so he could whisper in her ear, in a way that would seem intimate to anyone looking at them,

"You are not the one at fault here. If you want to go, I would understand and take you home without a fuss. But I want you to know that you have nothing to feel bad about."

She could see the confidence in his eyes, and all her worries flew out the window. So she smiled at Christian, decided to ignore the ghosts of her past, and Christian walked them to Raymond and the Kavanaghs. Elena brightly smiled to her, complimenting her dress when Christian and she greeted the group. Elena's husband gave her a small nod, with a compassionate smile that let Mia immediately know that Elena had told her husband about her past.

She didn't really hold it against the older woman, because she couldn't expect from her to keep secrets in her marriage, but it still made her feel uneasy. It seemed that no matter what, everyone's first impression of her would be based on her past. Elena's children briefly said hello to her and Christian, before walking away from them. She looked around, surprised that she couldn't see Raymond's daughter next to him since the Kavanagh children had been there. But before she could really take a good look, Raymond asked a dance from her.

She didn't dare refuse, even though she was sure that she was going to make a fool out of herself in front of all those fancy people, and Raymond led her to the dance floor, as a slow song was played by an orchestra.

"So how is school suiting you?" He asked with a genuine interest.

"I'm keeping up. If everything goes well, I should validate my year without a problem."

"I would suggest bribing if you're afraid of failing, but you don't seem to be that kind of person."

"No. I like to feel like I earned my things. If I didn't earn my apartment or my place in that school, I will make damn sure that I owe my diploma only to my hard work."

Raymond did not argue with that, simply giving her a nod that Mia liked to think was out of respect, and they kept on swirling with Raymond still nonchalantly talking.

"And still, Christian managed to tear you away from your studies for this one night."

"Yeah … All work and no play … I needed to go out a little, and being with Christian is always a good time."

Once again, Raymond nodded, and Mia felt that he was reading too much into what she just said, which was why she precipitately added, "_We're just friends_!"

The dance finished, and Raymond let go of her hand, a knowing smirk plastered on his face as he told her, "I never said otherwise."

She watched the man walk away, not sure of what just happened, but feeling that something did happen. But she did not go after Raymond to ask him what this was all about. As much as she did not fear from Christian, she was definitely scared of his boss. It wasn't much that she felt that he might kill her in a mood swing, but more that there was this aura around him that made her think twice about questioning him. Sure she knew very well how to conceal her thoughts and feelings, and always did her best to keep her fear of Raymond to herself, but there was still this unease when she was around him.

She put that on the fact that he was a notorious criminal who did not get to where he was by being nice to other people. Sure he helped her, and others before her, but this was probably his one redeeming quality, no matter how fondly Elena talked about him. Every time Elena told Mia about Raymond, Mia had the feeling that the older woman was talking about an older brother who was loving and very protective of his sister. But that did not cancel the fact that he probably killed more people than he had friends.

In all honesty, that very issue became a problem to Mia. He was paying for her education, and the deal they made would make her work for him in the future. Defending a man who put himself above the law, by transgressing that very law. She thought about it for weeks, almost walking out of her dream job before she realised that she did not really care. She minded that Raymond probably thought of himself above other people like all rich and powerful men did, but she did not mind his criminal background. Especially since he had at least one code of moral, and this particular code was in alinement with her own. She would never have to defend a child molester or a rapist; and since all lawyers sold their souls, she would rather do it for Raymond and know what she was getting herself into than do it for some company that would take her dignity along with her soul.

It was around the time when she took this decision that she started asking Christian a bit more about his 'side activities' as he would call them. It wasn't much really, she just wanted to know what she was getting herself into, and how bad it could get in a court of law.

As she took a glass of champagne and looked at the crowd, she saw that Christian was talking with some young businessman, and though his eyes weren't on her at that precise moment, she could swear that he had been looking at her a moment before. She appreciated the bubbly liquid, thinking that it was the first time that got to drink something so fancy. She had had a few customers who had bought expensive wines and champagnes, but who never actually let her drink any, too eager to get down to business.

"I noticed your glass was empty," A man said, handing her a new glass of champagne with a charming smile, and Mia's heart stopped in her throat.

She had seen Ethan Kavanagh a couple of times, but always from afar, and even when she greeted the Kavanagh earlier, she only saw him briefly. But now that he was flashing all his white teeth at her, standing in all his glory, Mia could not help but notice that he was good looking. He was actually more than good looking, he was a god. He was shorter than Christian but probably taller than Jose, his jaw sharp, despite the five o'clock beard shading it. His fair locks were rebelliously falling over his eyes, giving him a certain charm.

But what made Mia's heart miss a beat was his eyes. His blue eyes. They were deep blue, reminding her of the ocean on a clear day. She wondered why she never noticed Elena's eyes like that, but the Kavanagh matriarch quickly left her mind as she took the glass.

"Thank you," She said, admonishing herself for finishing so quickly her first drink. She did not want to get drunk tonight, because she wanted to wake up early the morrow, so she could study and catch up on what she did not do that night.

Ethan gave her a charming smile, and leaned his back against the wall, staying by her sides whilst the two of them watched other people dance, or talk business in various spots of the large ballroom.

"We live in the same building, right?" He nonchalantly asked, and she nodded. "So why haven't I been invited to your housewarming party?"

"Oh … I did not have one. I don't have the time really. Maybe I will have one over the summer when school is over."

"Oh? You're a student? What do you study?"

"Law."

"That explains the postpone. Though I hope to be invited when summer comes," He jovially said, and she nodded, not sure if she would actually throw a housewarming party. She didn't know anyone to begin with, and though she knew it was a custom that helped meet new people, she wasn't sure she wanted to meet new people.

For a moment, they remained silent, and Mia kept on ogling the handsome man beside her when it suddenly occurred to her that, would she have met Ethan Kavanagh in different circumstances, she would have had a crush on him. She knew that, though she thought that he was a sexy man, it was not the case. She wouldn't go as far as to say that she was through with men, but she did not care to enter any romantic relationship with them at the moment.

Her therapist told her that she was just scared on that step toward a new life, but Mia knew that it wasn't it. She simply didn't want to be with men. She knew that part of it was due to her past, but there was also the fact that she had this thin opportunity to do what she wanted, and she didn't want to jeopardise for a man. She wanted to focus on her career, built herself a name amongst lawyers, and a life for herself, and then, _maybe_, she would see if she wanted someone in her life

"This is actually the first time that I'm seeing Christian bring a date to this kind of events. You must be special to him," Ethan said, sipping on his glass and tilting his head toward Christian who was talking with Raymond's daughter and her date. Mia had seen the man on the news several times, he was an uprising politician who was making New Yorkers happier than their current mayor, even though he wasn't in office. Paul Clayton.

"Not really," She clarified, not wanting for people to misinterpret her relationship with Christian. In fact, now that she thought of it, the idea of being his Jenna was disturbing to her. It felt wrong on so many levels that she did not know where to begin. Which was why she felt obligated to add,

"Christian and I are just _friends_. He needed a partner, and I needed a night out."

"What does your boyfriend think of that? You going out with Christian at some fancy party?"

"Boyfriend?" Mia laughed, doing her best to be elegant about it. "Haha! Law school doesn't give me much time for a social life, let along, a boyfriend!"

Ethan frowned a little, as if he was not expecting this answer, and insisted, "Oh? Sorry, I thought you were with Christian's friend …"

"_Jose_?! Good Lord! No!" Mia exclaimed, horrified that someone could think her and Jose would be an item. She liked Jose very much, but she never thought of him that way. "He's just … being here for me. Last year ended rather badly for me, and Jose helps me pick up the pieces," She explained, though she felt that there was something off in this line of questioning.

She fully turned her head to really look at Ethan's face, and the first thing she saw was relief. For a moment, that emotion destabilised her, before it became clear that Ethan had been telling lies to know the truth. She looked back at the crowd, wondering how she had not noticed that Jose was gay (and apparently banging Elena's son) after all this time they spent together. Now that she was thinking about it, it explained how Jose always arrived bright and early when she had therapy sessions, and why he was always around when she needed to talk to him. He was at his boyfriend's. She had always assumed that Christian let his friend crash at his place, but apparently, she had been wrong.

Before she could find a decent way to ask Ethan about his relationship with Jose, Christian appeared by her side and snaked his hand on her waist as he whispered in her ear, "Let me walk you to dinner."

Mia waved Ethan goodbye, feeling like Christian just put on a show, and as they walk toward another room where their table was assigned, she slowly connected all the dots. "Christian? Can I ask you something?" He hummed, giving her his attention. "Is Jose gay?"

Christian rose an eyebrow at her, clearly not expecting that question. "What makes you think that?"

"I mean … I don't know. I feel like him and Ethan are involved."

Christian took in the information, but did not comment on it, or even answered her question. Since she knew that Christian never lied to her, she took his obvious eluding as a yes and narrowed her eyes as she saw through the game he just played in front go the Kavanagh eldest son.

"That show about you taking me by the waist and being all flirty … Did you try to subtly say something to Ethan?"

Christian chuckled, pulling the chair so she could sit, and le said with a light tone, "You're not even a lawyer yet, that you see double meanings everywhere."

And once again, he just tried to elude the real question. She properly sat on her chair, and stayed on her position when he took place next to her, "I do, and I know that's why you laughed when I said I didn't want to bring misunderstandings into a couple! Jose has one with his boyfriend, and you tried to dissolve it by making it seem as if we were together!"

"As I said, you're reading too much into this, Mia," Christian repeated, shaking slightly his head. She narrowed her eyes at him, and pointed out,

"And you're not denying it. You should have told me! I would have played the part and helped you on that, instead of screaming on the rooftop that I don't have a boyfriend."

Christian seemed surprised for a brief second, and it slightly annoyed Mia that, even though he trusted her with some part of his life, he still held her at bay about others. But what he said next explained things in a way she did not expect,

"Mia … this is not my secret to share. And Jose isn't really comfortable talking about."

"I won't say anything. But just so you know, I can keep a secret, and that's what friends are for."

He gave her a polite smile, and they stopped their ushered conversation to join the others and their mundanes talks. Around the table were the Kavanagh's with their dates, the Steeles and the politician Paul Clayton. They all ate, the conversation slowly drifting to politics, which seemed to annoy all the people of her generation who all excused themselves one by one off the table. All except Paul of course who was animatedly speaking about improving the city with a two years plan.

With a smile, Mia excused herself to the powder room, set on staying there the longest possible for she was not really eager to go back to the conversation. She had seen what Paul Clayton did on cameras, but she had a problem trusting that one politician could be so good and dedicated to the people, especially when that said politician came from a very wealthy family.

As she wandered around, looking for a bathroom, she checked her phone and happily saw that her paper had been properly sent to her professor. This was something she could stop worrying about, so she could now obsess on what the professor would think of her paper.

When she opened yet another in search on the bathroom, she happily found what she was looking for, and was even more relieved to see that it was the ladies' room. She rushed to a cubicle, her bladder suddenly reminding her all those glasses of wine and champagne she drank. It was only when she was fully relieved that she heard that someone was sobbing in one of the cubicles next to her.

She froze on herself, not sure if she should acknowledge the noise, or pretend as if nothing. She didn't know how posh people actually acted amongst themselves. She decided to pretend as if nothing and be as quiet as possible, but when she left the cubicle, she found Anastasia Steele powdering her nose in front of the mirror. Mia did not say a word, admiring a dress from up close, but trying to not be too obvious about it.

It was an elegant backless blue dress, all in chiffon and that was parted by a blue silken belt. Mia thought that the deep of the blue suited perfectly the fairness of her skin, but even more, it clashed in a magnificent way with the chestnut of her hair. Anastasia seemed to effortlessly convey grace and elegance, even though she was trying to make any trace of her crying disappear.

And when she saw a tear roll on the other woman's face, Mia changed her mind and butted in. She fished out of her purse a tissue and gave it to the brunette, without saying a word. She didn't want to be awkward. The Steele took it, with half a smile, and told her,

"So sorry you had to see that."

"It's me who should be sorry that you're crying."

The brunette wiped her tear away, and looked for her mascara, reapplying some layers as Mia awkwardly looked at her. "You should splash your face with cold water," she advised, and when Anastasia looked up to her with a confused look, she explained, "The cold makes the puffy red eyes disappear."

"Thank you," The other girl said, before doing as told.

"Can I ask you why you were crying?" Mia asked without being able to convince herself not to do it. She couldn't understand what would make a pretty girl with beautiful clothes and who was obviously in her element in that gala, cry like that. Or maybe her date had said something to upset her.

"It's … nothing really. I learnt bad news not long ago, and I seem unable to move on from it. The littlest thing upsets me. And … well, I try to keep it to myself, because it is my problem really. I didn't expect anyone to come in a bathroom so far from the gala."

Mia took note that she probably lost herself, if there were restrooms closer to the ballroom, and she gently rubbed the brunette bare arms to show her compassion. Anastasia sniffled, before smiling and returning focus on the mirror and redoing her makeup.

"You're Mia, right? You live in Kate's building," She said, as if nothing, her voice a bit more assured than before.

"Probably," Mia answered, having no idea of who Kate was. well, except for Elena and Christian, she didn't know any of her other neighbours. She knew Ethan lived in her building, and Christian had told her of a lady named Madame Dorothea, but that was about it.

"She's Elena's daughter. She's having a wedding next month."

"Oh," Was all she found to say, not sure if Anastasia was trying to make conversation with her, or if she was supposed to leave.

"By the way, I'm Ana."

"Nice to meet you," Mia politely said, seeing that the girl had magically removed all trace of her crying. In truth, even her voice and demeanour wouldn't betray that she had just cried.

Ana crunched her nose, and retorted, "I doubt that. You met me, crying in a bathroom, while at some boring gala … What we can do, is have a girl night with Kate, with no crying involved, lots of alcohol, and bitching about boys. Then, you will truly mean that it is nice knowing me."

Mia slightly grimaced, not eager to break the brunette's enthusiasm, especially after she finally stopped crying. "Erm … The thing is … School, you know. This is a big exception I'm making by being here."

"' All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy'. There's spring break coming, and you can take a night off, can't you? If you want, we will bitch about how school is hard and your professors don't deserve you.

Mia hesitated. If she was honest, the prospect of having girlfriends her age was rather appealing. And Ana seemed like a nice girl to hang around with. She didn't seem stuck up her nose, like the other women she saw at the gala, and seemed to be rather down to Earth. And she had to admit, though she liked Christian's friendship, despite his rigidness, she missed the kind of friendship she had back at the house.

"One night, then?"

Ana clasped her hands, before asking Mia for her phone and putting her number in it. Then, she walked to the bathroom door, and said, "If we end up becoming good friends, this meeting is bound to stay in our memories. This is worthy of a Mexican telenovela."

Mia repressed her giggled, and checked her reflexion on the mirror, fixing her slightly fading eyeliner before exiting the bathroom and cursing herself for not having gone with Ana. She was bound to lose herself yet again. Once again, she found herself slightly opting the rooms, so she could find the ballroom, when she heard Christian's voice.

She froze on herself, curious as to why Christian had left the principal room, and her question was answered when she heard a second voice,

"So. Do I have the right to assume that you being present here means that you're staying in my ranks?"

Mia frowned, shock taking over her. She had no idea that Christian had considered leaving Raymond. And actually, what Christian retorted with sass confirmed her doubts,

"Did you really think I would go?"

"To be honest, I had my doubts. There had been a time when you would have shoved with anger that offers right back in my face."

"I guess that after all those years of you telling me that I should learn to be patient, I finally learnt the lesson."

"Or maybe you actually considered leaving me," Raymond replied with a tone full of innuendos. Mia wished that she could see both of their faces. She wondered why would Christian ever considered leaving Raymond, and his job when it was obvious that he liked what he was doing.

"Trust me, Raymond. I never contemplated the idea of leaving you. Everything that I want in life is with you. The good, and the bad."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

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💚**So, yes this is a Mia chapter, and there is this one thing I want out of the way. Mia and Christian will not be an issue. I know how it might look like, but Mia and Christian are becoming friends and will become more than that in the future. Take it as a brother/sister kind of way, but not Lannister style. they will develop a love for each other, but not the romantic kind of love. Clearly not! I am just saying that because I don't want you to misinterpret Mia's feelings in this chapter. She talks about Christian a lot, but it is only because they are learning to know each other better. And I want you to take notice that Christian already implicitly trusts Mia. He gave her the keys to his place to feed his cat, and he has no problem telling her about his side activities. I just don't want you to go ruin in your mind the beautiful relationship I have for them. Plus, remember that Christian sort of relates to Mia. At some point, he asks himself if he would have ended in her position if he had been a girl. **

💚**And yes, Ana chose to wear a blue dress, because Christian told her several chapters ago that it was the colour he liked best on her.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of this chapter from Mia's pov?**

**💚What do you think of her different encounters that night?**

**💚 Do you think Ana will become friends with her?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

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‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	31. Chapter 30: Happiness

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 30****: Happiness (3,3K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚**So, for those who seem got the vibe that this was a filler chapter, remember that I already know how I want to go, and how I want certain characters to evolve. And for that to happen, I can't suddenly pop them up out of nowhere several chapters in. I need Mia to be more than just a background character, and I want her to be slowly getting into the story, not dropping on us out of nowhere. If you come to think of it, all Mia's chapters seem to be fillers, but they're not, they're here to set up the character that is Mia, just like Jose's chapters. I know this is a Christian/Ana story, but there are other plots in the story, that are already hinted at by those 'filler chapters'. And I know how it looks from your point-of-view, but in my perspective, all those other characters point-of-view are well-timed and serve their purpose exactly as I want them.**

💚**Also, in case it is not clear in the time frame, we are two days before the wedding, so a month after the gala**

💚**And there is a small wink for one of you. I hope you will recognise yourself in this. **

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**Christian's PoV**

When Christian got home that night, he was in a terrible mood, his hands and sleeves bloodied. He had to 'explain' to someone that delay was not an actual word when money came into question, and the man in question had been rather hard to crack. Had Christian met him in different circumstances, he might have actually tried to recruit him. Still, after several broken bones and a few times waterboarding, the man finally learnt his lesson.

This wasn't really what put Christian in a foul mood. To be honest, torturing people who owed Idris money did nothing to him or his conscience. What really ticked him off was the fact that the guy had the money to reimburse Raymond all along, and had tried to get away with never giving back the money he owed. To Christian, this was more than disrespect, it was insolence, and a lack of fear toward what Raymond could do to get his money back. It was showing Raymond, that people were starting to think of him as weak, and by extent, thinking of Christian as weak.

With a deep exhale to try to cool himself down, Christian sat on his couch, removing his shirt and throwing it on the floor, before laying back and closing his eyes. Less than a minute after, Bastille jumped on his laps and started to purr as Christian petted the cat. The more he was living with the kitten, the more he believed people saying that animals had a sixth sense to feel human emotions. Every time he had come home in a bad mood, Bastille had come to him and cuddled, taking away from him all bad aura and leaving him with a sense of peace, or at least, quiet emptiness.

While he mindlessly caressed his cat, Christian tried to figure out why people were challenging Raymond more and more. And suddenly, it hit him. It wasn't Raymond per se who was challenged, but more his legacy. _He_ was the one defied, testing his limits and seeing how far they could go with him. And all he could say was that he didn't like it.

If he had to make a statement, he would, without hesitation, but he didn't like people challenging his authority. Whether Raymond would pass on Idris to him or not didn't matter, he would not change for that and would keep his line of conduct as rigid as it had always been.

His thoughts wandered, going to all sorts of nonsense and 'what ifs' when a particular situation came to him. What would happen to him when Raymond would die? Whether it would be the morrow, or in thirty years, Christian realised that he was weak without Raymond. Not much because of the presence the man had himself, but because he would be alone.

Unlike Raymond, he did not have people he wholeheartedly trusted around him. Raymond had him, and though she was not a mobster herself, he had Elena. Christian barely had Jose. He trusted Jose with his life, but he never told the man, nor even gave him proof of that. And that left him pondering on what he could do to change that. He would also need to find at least one other person he could trust, someone who would put the interest of his future family first as Elena did with Raymond.

With a loud sigh, Christian got up, gathering his shirt and letting his cat fall on the ground. Bastille stalked him all the way up the stairs, following him in the bathroom, though he kept away from the water, curling in the sink. For the first time in a long time, Christian took a long shower, not really eager to go to bed. He knew that he was exhausted, but he didn't like going to bed when upset.

When he got out, Bastille had left. He examined his knuckles, seeing that though the blood had been washed away, bruises had appeared, and when he fisted his hands, his slightly hissed out of pain, thinking that maybe he shouldn't have gone so hard on the man. Ryan had tried to manage him like Ryan always did when they had a gig together. But as usual, Christian didn't listen and went with his guts.

Once in his room, he had the good surprise of finding Ana in his bed, and all his previous thoughts and worries suddenly disappeared into thin air. He smiled to himself, welcoming this unexpected visit and recalling that he had not checked his phone of the evening. Maybe she had tried to call him and ultimately failed. With delicateness, so he wouldn't wake her, he slipped into bed next to her, taking her in his arms, and smiling even wider when she snuggled against him, still sleeping.

He caressed her cheek, brushing away the few locks of hair that came covered her face and saw that once again, she had fallen asleep crying. Though she never commented on it, or even ever mentioned her brother again, Christian knew that his death was something that she had some problems to come to term with. And he had no idea how to help her. Even the fact that he was simply there for her did not seem to help her.

"Christian?" Ana mumbled, her voice heavy with sleep, and Christian held her a bit closer to him, kissing her forehead she hummed, hiding her face in his chest as he said, "I love you."

As those particular words left her lips in that particular order, Christian froze on himself, tilting his head down and waiting to see if, once again, Ana had been sleep-talking. He waited for two long minutes, but when it became obvious that Ana was lost in her world of dreams, he let out a breath.

It wasn't the first time that she declared her love to him in the numbness of her sleep. It was actually the second, and Christian recalled very well how the first time had occurred. It had been when he came back from Vegas and went to see her at her place in the middle of the night. He hadn't slept this night, his ear strained, listening to every single noise in fear of Raymond walking in on Christian in his daughter's bed. If Raymond were to know, Christian always thought that it would be better to at least prepare him a little.

The night had been silent, like this one, and she had uttered same the same words, her hand reaching for his. It had kept him awake all night, not sure of what that declaration could mean, or even how he felt about it. All night long, he had tried to figure out if those feelings were reciprocated, without being able to find the right answer.

Sure, he liked Ana. He knew that she was able to get a smile from him, no matter how bad-tempered he was at the moment. He knew that he often thought of her through the day. He knew that, more than once, his first thought when it came to sharing something personal, was to do it with Ana. But he wasn't sure if that meant that he was in love with her.

And there was also the fact that both times, the declaration came from her subconscious. Ana knew that she sleeptalked, and Christian often joked about that with her. Mostly because, though it was coherent, it didn't make sense. She often talked about broccoli, and turtles and Phill Collins' voice.

The last time she said those three specific words, she never bounced back on them. Even though Christian hinted at her that she had talked, she never asked what she could have said. And this was the part that was bothering him. He wasn't sure that Ana consciously loved him. She was so set on simply having and fun and keeping her father away, that Christian started doubting if her subconscious was even on the right path. He was anxious that, if he brought this conversation, Ana would freak out and end their relationship on the stop.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian was enjoying his sleep, recovering from his tiring day, when something pleasant tore him away from his dreams. Without opening his eyes, but smiling nonetheless, he rolled and kissed Ana, whose hand tightened a bit harder on his length. He repressed a growl and deepened their kiss, his hand flying to her nightgown, looking for her sweet spot.

She moaned when his finger slipped underneath her panty, biting his lower lip in the process. Slowly, he reached for her own hand still pleasuring him, and stopped her ministrations, before helping her out of her nightwear. Then, he pinned her against the mattress, and kissed his way from her lips to her breast, slightly sibling her left nipple, aware that it was her more sensitive.

She hissed with pleasure, rocking her hips at the rhythm of his hand, and when he was about to go further down, she stopped him and yanked him up, opening her legs to him. Christian smiled at her, reaching for a condom in his nightstand as he pecked her neck again and again. He knew that she was already wet and ready for him. She had been even before he started touching her, he felt how wet she was when he fingered her.

When he aligned himself to her entrance, Ana locked eyes with him, and he gently caressed her cheek, going in and out. They did not share a word, only breaking eye contact when they shared passionate kisses, and before any of them could try to prolong the moment, they reached their climax, one after the other.

For a moment, Christian stayed on top of Ana, kissing her shoulders and neck, before he rolled on the side, earning a pout. Though she never said it, he knew that Ana liked when he stayed inside of her after their coitus. But he was always afraid to crush her, so he never stayed long.

After taking off the condom and disposing of it in the bin, Christian rested his head on his hand, staying on the side so he could watch a satisfied Ana smiling at him. He traced the contour of her nose, making her scrunch it a little before she said,

"I thought you would have your evening off. I wanted to surprise you, but I only surprised Bastille."

"Don't worry, I was still surprised, even though you were not up to see it. And I am clearly not complaining. You know you can come whenever you want. That's why I gave you a key."

"Yeah, but I had this whole thing planned for us …"

"Sorry to have ruined your plans."

"Not really. I ended up dreaming about it, and you ended up giving me what I wanted," She blustered, giggling like a child when he tickled her sides.

"I tell you what. Next time you come, I will rock your world so hard, you will lose your voice."

Ana beamed at this promise, sitting up and involuntarily forcing Christian to do the same. He checked the time, seeing that it was still the middle of the night, and waited for Ana to explain the master plan that probably sprouted in her head.

"So, I wanted to go to Peru for my birthday, and since it's in three weeks, can you hold that promise until then?"

"Or I can reiterate for your birthday."

This made her smile even wider, making Christian unable to resist her and smile back.

"So? What would you want me to get you for your birthday?" Christian asked, taking her hand in his and caressing her soft skin.

"You. I mean, for an entire week, I want you and nothing else. No work calls or emails. No last minute leaving alone in the plane. Just you and I alone for the whole week."

"Have you asked your father yet?"

"No. And I won't if you can't promise me a week of just us," She replied, her eyes planted in his. He thought about it, trying to see if he could go completely MIA for a whole week, and decided that he would ask Jose to take care of the most important matters.

So he nodded, promising the brunette the gift she wanted, though he was going to make sure to give her something else, feeling that it wasn't that hard for him since he wanted to spend time with her, to begin with.

Ana clapped her hands before kissing Christian and laying back in bed, taking Christian's hand with her to rest it on her breast. He had noticed that this was something that she liked, having his hand over her breast when they were sleeping. Even when they hadn't had sex, she always fell asleep with his hand covering her breast.

"I'm so excited about the day after tomorrow. I can't believe they're getting married!" She squealed, making Christian laugh at her.

"If you're that excited, for their wedding, what is it going to be for yours?"

"My wedding is going to be AWESOME! You have no idea. I have this whole thing planned in my head!"

Christian chuckled at her excitement, kissing her temple in a patronising way that did not go unnoticed,

"You never thought about your wedding?"

"Not really?"

"But … you do want to get married? Or you are one of those people who want to live in concubinage with the mother of their children?"

"To be honest, I never really lingered on having a wife, or on the mother of my future children."

Ana turned her head to stare at him, clearly shocked by what she was hearing. "You are not making any sense? You have a room full of children too and books, and you never thought you needed a woman to have them."

"I know I need a woman to have kids. It's just that … she's always been an afterthought… Women come and go, children are the only constant in life. Are you telling me that you thought of your husband?"

"Of course! And he's going to be perfect! Handsome, because I want cute kids. Tall, because I don't want them to be midgets like me. Great guy, so my kids can be proud of him, and look up to him. Is okay with Dad and all his sorts of businesses, because I don't want to choose between my husband and my father. He's capable of making me smile when I'm the saddest. And he knows how to cook so I won't starve to death while pregnant."

"Ana … this is Prince Charming you're describing. That guy exists only in cartoons," Christian cautiously said, surprised that someone as practical as Ana could be so dreamy and realistic when it came something so important in life.

She snorted. "Didn't you hear me when I said that I wanted him to be okay with Dad? What kind of Prince Charming would be okay with Dad?"

Christian did not pip a word to that, knowing that they were close to that line that they had never crossed. That lined where they would both acknowledge out loud to one another that Raymond (and by default Christian) was a mobster.

"And he needs to have all these qualities, so I can be the best version of myself."

"What do you mean?" He asked, furrowing his brows.

"I mean … Well, I will never be a genius, and I will never be an artist or an athlete. I will never be the best at maths, or music, or running. But I will be damned if I won't be the best mother ever! I will be the Mom other girls my age will look up to with envy. This is the only thing I know I will be good at, and I need my husband to help me be perfect at it."

For a moment, Christian remained silent, shocked by what he was hearing. Never he would have thought that Ana was seeing herself in such a dim light. He reached out for the nightstand, adding artificial light to the moonbeam, and gently cupped Ana's face with one hand, looking deep into her eyes.

"You're already the best at many things. You don't need to be defined by your relationship with other people."

She rolled her eyes, clearly not believing him, and Christian insisted,

"You're the best at being compassionate and showing it. I'll never forget how upset you were when you saw those homeless people in Paris. I should have been the one showing empathy, I can relate, I have lived in the streets and slept in the snow. But you're the one who felt for them

You're the best at putting others before you. Like you do with your friend by taking care of all the little problems coming along the way, so she doesn't have to worry about her wedding. Like you building that shelter for homeless and doing your best to rehabilitate them. Like you not asking your father about your mother, no matter how badly you want to know about her because you know it will make him sad."

Christian held her gaze, waiting for her to agree, but when she did, it was with a playful smile in the corner of her lips, "That's only two. You said many."

"I can't decently give them all to you, now. It will get to your head."

"You could have said I'm the best at having sex. I wouldn't have minded. Even though I can't really brag about it," She joked, and Christian felt relieved that she saw things his way.

"You can brag about it. But then, it's called porn."

"_Oh_! We could be co-porn-stars! I mean, you totally have the cock for it! Though you'd probably ditch me. No guy wants their girlfriend to be a porn star."

"No guy wants that, indeed."

"Hey! You're supposed to say that it wouldn't matter and that you wouldn't mind!" She complained, slapping his hand and unknowingly reminding him of his bruised knuckles.

"Nope. I won't go around and lie to you that I don't mind sharing you. Especially when I have to share you with internet creepers."

Ana smiled at him and kissed him with delicacy. "Jealous?"

"I'm not."

"I like when you get jealous by pretending you're not jealous. It's so cute. It makes me want to jump you, again …"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

💚**Awwwww sweet moment ... Enjoy while it lasts, it's all I have to say ... ENJOY WHILE IT LASTS 😈😈😈**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Ana's description of her perfect man?**

**💚What do you think of their relationship?**

**💚 What did you think of their talk about marriage?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am sorry, but I am dead to the world. So I won't be answering individually. But all in all, Mia and Christian have a similar history, and that's why they get along. They can relate better to each other than others too. _

_As for those last words, remember that Christian loves being a mobster and he doesn't like not telling Ray the truth. He would rather say it, but in any case, he wants to stay with Ray. So far, he still hasn't admitted his feelings for Clary to her, nor even himself. But keep that in mind so you can understand Ana better as well ..._

_As for Ana, someone made an interesting theory, but she is just sad over her brother. She loved, and he was her big brother. She only has good memories of him, and she put a lot of hopes in Jace finding him. Now, she can't really mourn properly because her father doesn't talk about him, so she doesn't have people about it. _

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	32. Chapter 31: Wedding Bliss

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 31****: Wedding Bliss (4,1K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So, I really hope that you enjoyed that last chapter … Because well, it was to be enjoyed … Mouahahahaha**

💚** Also, I just wanted to point to that, though Ana did not say it, it is implied that her father has to approve of whoever would be her husband. She says she doesn't want to have to choose between the two of them, and it goes both ways.**

💚**ALSO! In case it wasn't clear enough, it's been several months since Ana and Christian have been together. Since the end of September, and we are now in May.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Doing his best to not appeared bored out of his mind, Christian watched Katherine Kavanagh (now Cohen) open the dance with the man she had just married, up until this day, he had tried to get out from this particular event, but he had had no valid excuse. Especially after Katherine herself put an invitation in his mailbox. He felt like it would be disrespectful to ignore her like that when she personally invited him (as personal as it could get given the fact that they did not know each other that well), and when she several times helped Ana and he get together.

Mia had come with him, though it was because she had been invited herself by Katherine after Ana introduced the two girls to each other. Mia only stayed for the ceremony, spring break being behind her, she was submerged by papers and due dates and did not want to mess up her first year. But she still took a few hours to come to Katherine's wedding, and gush about the dress to Christian during the ceremony. Though all really he cared about that dress was how impracticable it seemed to be.

Still, he had to admit that Mia being with him made the time pass quicker. They had this game where they would try to guess what other guests were saying by reading on their lips, improvising after it turned out that Mia was really bad at reading lips. And now that Mia was gone, Christian estimated that he had to stay at least a couple of hours at the reception, before leaving without appearing like a total jerk.

He was sitting at the couple's table, which he actually found odd since he never exchanged more than five words with Katherine, but when Raymond moved seats to sit beside him whilst Eamon took his daughter away from her new husband, he suspected that his boss had some saying concerning his table placement.

Raymond did not say a word for a while, watching his Goddaughter smile with glee whilst talking and waltzing with her father. Christian glanced at his phone, repressing a grimace as he saw that barely ten minutes had passed. These were going to be the longest two hours of his life.

Whilst he kept his eyes locked on a spot in front of him, his peripheral vision watched Ana dance with Paul, her face serious and apparently very invested in whatever the two of them were talking about. She was wearing a short pink dress that only had one sleeve on which there was a flower, which seemed appropriate since the theme of the wedding was floral pink.

If he were honest with himself, Christian was slightly annoyed that Ana had chosen Paul yet again as her plus one. He knew that he was just her cavalier for the night each time and that she chose him because he was her easiest choice, but that didn't mean he had to like it. He couldn't exactly pinpoint what was bothering him about him. Maybe it was the way he looked at Ana, or maybe it was the fact that _he_ had the possibility to take her out, without fearing consequences either from Ana or from Raymond.

"I am going to get my dance with Kate before it's too late, and she complains about her feet hurting," Raymond said, getting up and walking to his Goddaughter, to replace Eamon as her dance partner.

Mister Kavanagh placed a kiss on his daughter's forehead and left her in the hands of his friend before coming to sit back at their table, where Raymond used to sit. Christian said nothing, still wondering what he was doing there when he was obviously out of his element, and not in his place.

"I think Raymond is jealous," Eamon suddenly said, tearing Christian away from his lethargy. He turned his head to the older man, not sure if Mr Kavanagh was talking to him, or to himself. They weren't that close, after all.

Eamon had a small smile, his eyes looking away from his daughter, to land on Ana now dancing with his youngest son.

"Ana has always wanted to have this kind of fairytale wedding. But as time passes, she's not presenting any possible princes to the dragon. So I guess Raymond got around the idea that he would have to wait a while before giving his daughter this sort of happiness."

Christian nodded, not exactly sure if he was expected to give his opinion. He could understand what Eamon was saying, and see what Raymond could be jealous about, but that did not mean he had to have a say in it.

The two men watched Raymond pass from Katherine to Ana, making his daughter brightly smile and laugh at whatever he told her; and Eamon continued, probably trying to make conversation with Christian and make him feel less out of place,

"Though I understand that Ana's suitors aren't that eager to meet her father. I remember almost shitting my pants when Elena introduced us. And Elena is not his precious and only daughter."

This ought to catch Christian's attention. Though he kept quiet, he fully turned his upper body to Eamon, silently asking for more, and Eamon seemed only too eager to talk. Christian watched him take another glass of champagne, wondering if it was the alcohol that made him so chatty.

"I met my wife when I was working as a receptionist for Robinson Inc', probably five years after they skyrocketed in the business market. I didn't even know who she was, just that she would drop by every once in a while, without ever needing a pass or an ID. One day, I gathered the courage to ask her for dinner, and one thing leading to another, we dated for six months.

Strangely, at that period of time, I got promoted to secretary, but I didn't see it as strange at the time. Just as luck striking me again. And most importantly, I didn't know who she was to Raymond and Eric, which were my bosses.

So when Elena said that if we wanted to go further, I would need to meet her childhood friends, I thought nothing of it. But when I saw at that restaurant table that Raymond Steele and Eric Lincoln were sitting beside her, I almost fainted.

The new generation might be more scared of you, and more oblivious of Raymond, but back in the day, it was never good news to go up in his office. And though everyone pretended otherwise, everyone knew of the nasty rumours out in the streets concerning that man.

Needless to say that I barely spoke during the meal. I didn't eat much, and I probably sweat too much. Eric did try to be friendly, but Raymond can have a nasty glare that can freeze Hell over. Though I survived dinner, and I was happy to see the next day that I wasn't fired either."

Christian kept on looking at Eamon, though he noticed from the corner of his eye that Raymond had finished dancing with his daughter, and had disappeared somewhere.

"I asked Elena to marry me six months later. And the very same night I did, I got home to find Raymond waiting for me in my apartment. He scared the living crap out of me. I think the only other time he scared me like that was when Elena got pregnant with Ethan. Raymond is a scary man when he protects the ones he loves."

Eamon nodded to himself at this conclusion while Raymond took a seat next to him, a jovial smile on his lips. A waiter put down a small barrel, and Raymond gently tapped his friend's shoulder as he friendly inquired,

"Talking trash about me?"

"Always," Eamon retorted with a mischievous smile. It was clear that he was no longer the man who feared to cross his girl's brother (or substitute of it). He had grown to respect Raymond not out of fear, but out of the love they shared for the same woman, no matter how different their relationships to that person were.

Raymond took two whiskey glasses and poured some brown liquid out of the barrel on which Christian noticed a small date scribed. After giving one of the glasses to Eamon, Raymond explained,

"What Eamon fails to mention, is the fact that he was a lady's man back then. I was not going to let Elena get her heart broken like that."

The two men laughed together, their eyes falling back on the dance floor with a satisfied sigh. They took a sip out of their glass while Christian resisted the temptation to check his phone once again. He knew that the more he checked, the slower time would seem to be.

When he took his glass of water to his lips, mostly to busy himself, Eamon exclaimed with indignation, '_Water_! Raymond serve him some whiskey! How can you let him drink water on a day like this?"

"Christian doesn't drink," Raymond said before Christian could even think of protesting in a way that wouldn't seem offensive. Eamon stared at him, dumbfounded, before shaking his head with sadness,

"Poor boy. You need to loosen up. It's not healthy to be uptight like that."

Christian did not retort anything, though he distinctly heard Raymond chuckle at the taunt. He was used to people saying that he was too rigid, judging solely on his social skills and diet, but he had learnt to not care the least in the world.

"I'm serious," Eamon insisted, pouring himself another glass of whiskey. "You need to appreciate the good things while you're young. And the good things don't like stick-in-muds. Did you ever even had a girlfriend with that sort of attitude?"

Christian barely gave Eamon any attention, though he glanced at the barrel, wondering how strong could that beverage be to untie Eamon's tongue like that. Raymond seemed to have followed his gaze because he explained,

"We opened the barrel this morning with coffee. And it has to be finished by tonight when Kate gets to her limo. The whiskey has been put into the barrel the day of her birth. I have one like that for every single one of them."

He pointed to the dance floor where the three Kavanagh were, as well as Ana. Katherine was dancing with her little brother, while Ethan was spinning her mother around. Ana, her, was waltzing with Elliott, animately speaking with him.

"The barrel is already half empty," Raymond added, which explained to him the friendly and open nature of Mr Kavanagh. After all, it was a happy day for him, alcohol made him even lighter. Raymond on the other hand barely seemed affected by the alcohol, though Christian suspected that he had stronger resistance to the amber beverage than his friend.

"Aren't you jealous, though?" Eamon asked, and Raymond shook his head, knowing what he was referring to.

"My time will come. And when I will walk Ana to the altar, I will ask you back that question," He replied with a smug smile.

The two of them laughed while Christian tried to not overthink what he could be doing instead of being here. Maybe he should have listened to Mia and asked Jose to come with him at the reception. At least, he would have someone to talk to while people danced, and their boss got drunk with the bride's father.

His eyes fell on the girl in question, who looked right back at him, something gleaming in her blue eyes before her older brother asked a dance from her. She smiled and took his hand letting him lead her back to the dance-floor.

"Your kids are doing this whole thing out of order, though," Raymond commented, his eyes also on the couple of siblings. "Shouldn't Ethan be the first one to get hitched, carry on the legacy of the name, and all?"

"Yes. I had always hoped that Ethan would get married first. In order, you know. Even though Elliott was a done deal since forever, I had always hoped that Ethan would beat them to it. Or at least, I figured I would know my future son-in-law by now."

"What do you mean?"

"He's been seeing someone for at least two years. And though he introduced us to all his past boyfriends, he keeps this one in the loop. Why would he keep us away from this particular relationship? I smell trouble!"

Though Christian pretended otherwise, keeping his eyes on the ever-moving dancers, his whole attention was on the conversation. He had no idea why Jose did not want to come out, but he didn't want Raymond to come to snoop around and out him before he was ready. And if Raymond started getting suspicious that his Godson was in some kind of trouble, he was definitely going to lead an investigation on that.

"Do you want me to look into it?" Raymond asked with seriousness, and though Eamon served himself with yet another drink, Christian could tell that he was serious as well.

"I don't know. It's his life, and I don't want to intrude. He is entitled to make his own mistakes, even in the love department. And Elena would kill me. But … what if the guy is just after Ethan's money? Or what if he's on drugs, and is trying to pull Ethan down with him? Or what if he's a guy toying with his heart, and cheating every chance he gets?"

"I'll look into it. If the guy is bad news, I'll have someone send a message. otherwise, we will wait for Ethan to tell us on his own," Raymond proposed, though everything in his tone was indicating that it was more of a statement. No matter what Eamon would say, Raymond would try to find out who Ethan was dating.

Subtly, he moved on his chair, hoping to catch his boss's gaze, and not even a second later, Raymond declared, "I could have Christian look into it. Ethan would never notice."

Christian repressed a smirk of victory, having led his boss to say exactly what he wanted, and he played the two men just as he planned, leading them away from that idea of finding out who was Ethan's boyfriend,

"The boyfriend is not bad news. He's just not out of the closet, yet."

The two men looked at him with suspicion, though Eamon seemed more relieved than suspicious. Christian held Raymond's gaze, knowing that every breath was important from now on and that he was in more danger than being under a lie detector.

"What do you mean? Do you know that guy?"

Christian kept his eyes on Raymond, as he said the most naturally in the world, "I saw them a couple of times together, and I saw the guy several times going into the building, or out. And he seems to be the kind of guy who is still in the closet. I think that your son is just waiting for his friend to come out to tell you."

Those were the exact words Eamon needed to hear. He heavily sighed with a relieved sigh and poured himself another glass of whiskey, celebrating his son's healthy relationship. Raymond, on the other hand, kept his eyes on Christian, probably scanning his very soul.

"For how long have you known?"

"A while. But it's not my business to talk about those kinds of things."

"And you're right! Ethan will tell us when they will be ready," Eamon jovially exclaimed, cutting short any further interrogations Raymond could have.

Christian returned his attention to the dancers, sensing that Raymond was still looking at him, but he pretended to ignore it. His eyes quickly fell on Ana who was dancing with Ethan, the two of them laughing. He kept looking from couple to couple, seeing that Elliott was dancing with his mother-in-law, and suddenly stood before him the bride.

For a second, Christian wondered if he should get up and pull a chair for her, but all his thoughts of chivalry died when she presented her hand to him, expecting him to take it. He stared at it, slightly confused. They did not know each other well enough for them to dance together.

"You can't come to my wedding, and not dance with me. I would be deeply offended and create a trend out of this on Twitter if you refuse."

The two older men snickered at Christian, clearly enjoying his lack of choice in the matter, and so he stood up, straightening his suit a little before following the blonde in white to the dance-floor. After a few steps, Katherine tilted her head up, forcing him to look down so he wouldn't appear as rude.

"Enjoying yourself?" She brightly smiled, and he gave her a small smile, that he knew convincing, despite the fakes behind it.

"As this is my first wedding, every experience is new and will forever be forged in my memory."

She smiled, flattered, before her brows suddenly furrowed, understanding what the sentence really meant.

"Gee! Ana is right. You are the master at eluding. A simple no would have sufficed. I know that men only come to weddings to get girls, and you already have one crazy brunette on your hands."

Christian simply smiled, noting in a corner of his mind that Ana apparently shared with her friends her thoughts on him. He didn't mind, but he had been curious to know, because though she often talked about her best friend, Ana never mentioned if she talked about him to her. On the other hand, he never even told Ana that Jose knew about them…

"What did you get me?" Katherine asked with a childish cantor, and for a second, Christian felt like it was Ana asking. They had the same way to scrunch their nose, using the same cute little voice and having the same sparkles of wider in their eyes.

"There's an envelope with my name on the back on the gift table," He eluded with a devious smile.

If there was one thing he knew he did right about this wedding, it was the gift. Mia had gone for matching personalised mugs, but Mia knew Katherine more than Christian. He knew that the three girls had already spent a few nights together, which made him laugh because Mia was always the one saying that she didn't have time to socialise with her studies. She even spent the night before with the girl, celebrating Katherine's bachelorette party.

He, on the other hand, he went after the only thing he knew for sure would please the bride. He had no idea how the groom would feel about it, but to be honest, he did not really care. Ana had mentioned at Christmas that her friend would be more than happy to get the cat back if he didn't want it, and so he got the now Mrs Cohen her own kitten.

It was a different breed than Bastille, but he made sure to take him young. And before going to pick up Mia, he snuck into Katherine's apartment and let the cat there in his cage, evident on the dinner table.

"Though, I think you might enjoy this present more than your husband will," Christian warned. Katherine beamed at the word 'husband', but swiftly squinted her eyes at Christian, warning him,

"If it's a coupon, I will come by your place, and throw it back at your face!"

"I truly hope you won't do that," He earnestly said, imagining the pain that he would be in if a cat was thrown at his face.

Katherine suspiciously looked at him, making Christian smirk, just in order to taunt her. And as he had expected, her reaction was similarly the same as the one Ana have had. But then, she shook her head, trying to regain her cool and she said,

"Ana says that she's spending her birthday with you." Though she had tried to sound detached, Christian still noticed the hints of sadness in her voice. She had probably hoped to spend her best friend's birthday with said best friend.

"She wants to go to Peru," Christian clarified. Because if Ana wanted to spend her birthday here, and then to Peru, it could be very easily arranged.

"That's her fancy excuse. But bottom line, she wants to spend her birthday with you, Christian. I mean, you're not stupid, you know that she can go to Peru whenever she wants," Katherine snapped, making Christian slightly frown.

This wasn't how he had seen this trip. Sure she had asked for his full attention, but he never saw the trip as an excuse to be alone with him. He simply thought that it was one of Ana's latest antics. She liked to travel, and Peru had famous landmarks that he knew she would enjoy.

Katherine seemed to understand how clueless Christian was, for she sighed, and explained, "Ana doesn't always say up front what she wants. That's how she is. She doesn't always say how she feels either because that's how Ray raised her. I'm not criticising my Godfather, I'm just telling you that Ana isn't used to speaking about her feelings, because her father never does.

And … well … She is getting attached to you. Even if she pretends otherwise, I can tell. And I know we don't know each other, but I'm asking you anyway. Don't break my friend's heart. She's already had her heartbroken by the loss of her Mom, and her grandad, and her brother. I don't want her to get her heart broken then again, and by love nonetheless."

This ought to be a surprise to Christian. He never expected his dance to turn out to be about Ana, and even less about him breaking her heart. It even seemed strange to assemble those words in that order in his head. He was about to assure Katherine that neither Ana or he ever intended to play with the other's heart when she shook her head, and precipitately said,

"You don't have to say anything or to promise me anything. I am not her Dad. I am just a friend looking out for another, and I am asking you this one favour. Please?"

Their song finished just as Christian acquiesced, and he returned to his table were Raymond and Eamon were animatedly talking with Elena about Jake's boarding school. Apparently, the two men were not that eager to send the youngest Kavanagh away, and he kept on pushing the issue with his mother. Christian noticed how Elena had a small smile when her eyes landed on the empty small barrel, and she played the two men in her hand like a pro, making them turn in her favour with an agile game of wording and timing.

Christian repressed a smile when he heard Raymond get beat down by Elena, at a game that he supposedly mastered, and he checked his phone for the time, feeling that he earned it. With a little luck, at least an hour would have passed, and now that he had danced with the bride, he could leave without being rude.

But when he lit his screen, he surprisingly saw that he had four missed calls from Jose, all rather close one to another. Without a word, he got up and headed to the bathroom, worried that something might have happened to his friend who knew where he was today, and he called him back as soon as he was alone.

Jose picked up at the first ring, and didn't even bother with the usual mundanities, "I need you _right now_, Christian. Please."

He ignored the bile rising in his throat at the panic clear in Jose's voice, and simply said, "I'll be at your place in half an hour."

Then he hung up and went back to his table, where Raymond and the Kavanaghs were now laughing. Christian didn't even bother knowing what it was about, he tapped Raymond on the shoulder, and whispered so low, that only his boss could hear,

"I have to check something. I'll be back in a couple of hours."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

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**💚Cliffies! How I missed you! 😈😈😈**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the moment between the three men?**

**💚What do you think of the wedding gift?**

**💚 What did you think of Kate's little talk?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_**Guest1**: It seems that Christian fits that description, though we don't really know if Ray would approve of a mobster for his daughter._

_**Guest2**: Haha, well, it seems that Ana is blind in that department, as for the rest ... we shall see..._

_**Guest3**: Well .. I did say that the sweet moments were gone ..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	33. Chapter 32: The Ghost Of The Past

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 32****: The Ghost Of The Past (6,1K)**

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**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** Oh my God! We are at 275 reviews! Thank you so much for the love you're giving this story. I hope you will keep on giving it much love, no matter what happens in the next chapters... **

💚**ALSO**‼️**Remember that this story is rated M not only because of lemon but also because of violence and strong content! This story isn't about unicorns and rainbows, and some VERY DARK AND HARD themes are in there**‼️

💚** Also, I know this chapter was supposed to be released yesterday, but it was pretty hard to write, so I gave myself a break mid-writing. Sorry. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

Jose slumped on his couch, switching on the TV just so he could have some background noise. Today was Katherine Kavanagh's wedding and a part of him couldn't stop wondering if Ethan would have asked him to come with him as his date if they were still together. It had been a month since they had broken up, and Ethan did not try to contact him even once. Well, he didn't try to contact Ethan either.

He knew that their issues had more to do than just the belief that he might entertain an illicit affair with Mia. Their fight had been dormant for months, and Mia was just the excuse Ethan used to let it all out. In a way, Jose didn't blame him. He knew he was far from being the perfect boyfriend. He did not want to meet his parents, and he always avoided talking about himself and even more about his past.

He was thinking that maybe he should try and forget about his past, or at least leave it where it belonged and that he should take that step toward Ethan. Sure he wasn't going to be open about him all of the sudden, but he could take that step that was meeting his parents and making official their couple. He knew that this was something that Ethan desperately wanted, just as proof that he was involved enough in their relationship. Maybe he could do this one little thing for the man he loved.

But this was another thing altogether. As the months passed, he had developed feelings of love for Ethan Kavanagh, but he always refused those same feelings when they came from his lover. Mostly because he doubted the love would remain if Ethan truly knew everything there was to know about him.

As he was brooding, flipping through the channels without ever setting his mind on any program, his phone rang, tearing Jose out of his lethargy. He picked up without checking the announcer, grateful for whatever distraction it would give him, but when he heard his boss's voice, he straightened up right away.

He found it odd that Raymond called him when it was his Goddaughter's wedding day. The ceremony must probably be minutes away, and he still took the time to call him, making Jose fear that there was some sort of emergency,

"Everything okay, boss?"

"Everything is alright. I just have been given some pieces of information that you ought to know," Raymond assured, and though his tone was benevolent, Jose still did not relax.

"I have had this information for a while, now. But I was hoping he would change location."

"You know where he is?" Jose anxiously said, repressing the best he could all the feelings that this sentence arose in him.

"Like I said, I have known for a while. But he is in Moscow, and it seems that he is setting up residence there. Now, I can have someone there by tomorrow if you want —" Raymond started, but Jose immediately cut him off, shaking uselessly his head as he strongly declared,

"No! I'll do it myself. Just send me the address, and give me the next week off."

He felt Raymond hesitate on the other line of the phone, and he knew full well why. The last time he had this opportunity, he miserably blew it. But this was a thing that _he_ needed to do, and no matter how much he owed Raymond, he didn't want some faceless man to do his job for him.

"Raymond? … Thank you," He said, not sure of what else to say.

Raymond brushed it off, before saying that he was off to see Kate marry her man; and Jose got up to pour himself a glass of vodka while his laptop came to life.

Then, he sat back on his couch and looked for immediate plane tickets to Moscow. But as he selected one that would make him leave in the early evening, his heart rate started to pick up. He shook it off, pouring himself another glass to find some courage, and he reasoned with himself.

He had no reason for letting his fear take over this one thing he had wanted all his life. This was the dream that helped him sleep when the nightmares came to haunt him. This was the goal he had set himself ever since he was ten. This was the reason why he couldn't be honest with Ethan. He _needed _to do this. To move on, for closure. _He needed to get over his fear_.

It was with this new-found resolve that Jose downed yet another glass of vodka, and prepared his bag for his trip abroad. But the more clothes he put in his bag, the tighter his throat felt, the harder it was for him to swallow, and the faster his stomach turned with fear.

When he was finished packing, the bottle of vodka was empty, and his nerves far from being calm. He called a cab to take him to the airport, sure that he would be able to do it. Sure that his desire for revenge was stronger than his fear of closed spaces. But as soon as he sat in the yellow car, his stomach turned so violently that he had to tell the driver to pull over so he could throw up.

It was bent in half, hurling his guts away, sweat covering every inch of his body while the cab driver awkwardly tapped his back that Jose realised that he would not make it to Russia. No matter how much he wanted this, he never prepared his mind to take a plane, and his brain was not going to allow him to be trapped in a metal flying box for over ten hours, with no viable exits.

With defeat, he paid the cab driver for the fare he would never do, and went back to his house, drowning his sorrow with another bottle of vodka. He was getting pissed that this vengeance he had craved for, for over two decades was denied to him because of his fear. He was angry at himself for being so weak, angry at fate for putting this man out of reach, and angry at the world for being the way it was.

And suddenly, it hit him. It didn't really matter to him if he was the one behind the operation. All he wanted was his revenge, and for the man to know that he was behind it. Raymond had proposed to have someone do it for him, and at the moment, it had seemed like a preposterous idea. Now that he thought of it, with the certainty that he couldn't do it himself, it didn't seem like such a bad plan.

Still, he only trusted one person to do it, and make him feel as truly avenged, and so he pulled up his phone and called Christian. His friend did not pick up, even after Jose insisted several times, and that's when he recalled that Christian had been invited at the Kavanagh-Cohen wedding unlike him.

He grumbled under his breath, trying to find a solution to this never-ending problem when Christian finally called back. For a second, Jose was at a loss for words, not sure of how to ask properly this of his friend; and he ended up telling him that he needed him. Christian didn't need further explanation and promised to be there as soon as he could.

While waiting for his friend, Jose finished his second bottle trying to figure out if he wanted to drown his sorrows, or if he was hoping to find liquid courage to tell his friend why he needed him.

Christian arrived thirty minutes after his phone call, just as Jose finished the last drop of alcohol in his glass, and for a second, the man did not say a word. He simply stared at his friend, taking in his surroundings and his obvious state of inebriation.

Without a word, he took the empty glass and bottle away, and came back from the kitchen with a cold glass of water, before sitting next to Jose, silently pushing the water in front of him. Jose took the glass, the coolness slightly sobering him, and he blurted out,

"I need a favour."

"I'm listening," Christian simply said, waiting for Jose to go on.

"I need you to kill someone for me."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

**4 years old**

Jose was watching his mother with awe. She was painting her face, putting red on her lips and black on her eyes, but even with that, he thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. Especially compared to those woman in that new country they were.

He didn't like this new country, and he wished they had never left where they used to live. People didn't speak like him, didn't look like him, and made him feel all alone here. well, they would have if it wasn't for his Mama. She looked like him, they had the same eyes, like an almond she would say. They spoke the same language that great warriors spoke before she would say. She had long-long black hair, that Jose loved to play with. She was a bit more white than him, but Mama would say it was because he had to look a bit like his Daddy.

Jose had never seen his father, and his mother rarely spoke of him. But she always smiled to Jose when he would ask, and say that he was a king who gave her a prince. and Jose liked that he was a prince. Even if it was just for pretend, he liked that his Mamma saw him as a prince.

Of course, all of that was before they came to that awful country. Ever since they came, his mother was sad. She would pretend that not, and smile to him, but Jose saw that her eyes weren't happy like they were before. They were always sad. He even heard her cry the night, even when she had friends coming over and give her hugs.

The nights she cried the hardest was when the man in black came. Jose didn't like the man in black. He scared him. It was the man in black that made them come to this new strange country and who found a small house for them. It was the man in black who made his mother cry the most and who gave her nasty booboos on her face.

"Hop! Go to your room it's time for you to go to sleep, mi principito," His mother suddenly said, putting down her brush.

"I'm not tired," He argued. His mother gave him the big eyes, and he sullenly complied, following her to his room. This was an improvement from their original home. He had his own room, and his Mama even bought him a couple of toys. Before, she and he slept in the same small bed, and they shared the room with one of her friends.

With love, his Mama tucked him in bed, and kissed his forehead, "You stay in your bed, and you think of our magical island to go to sleep."

"Mamma, I want you to stay with me. I don't want you to go with him."

She smiled at him, but this was one of her new smiles that Jose didn't like. It was a smile with sad eyes, and he missed when she would have happy eyes smiling at him.

"I tell you what, when he leaves, I'll come and sleep with you? How is that?" She proposed, and Jose vigorously approved.

But he was cut short of his usual hug by a knock on the door. His mother glanced, though the door had remained closed, and she kissed his forehead and left. Jose quickly got up and put his ear on the door to listen. He heard the man argue about something he didn't like, before the noise of a slap echoed.

With his heart beating louder than it should, Jose peaked the door opened, trying to see what was happening, and he saw the man in black hitting his mother before dragging her to her room. He was terrified, unsure of what to do. His Mama had told him to say in his bed, and he had a feeling that he was not meant to see any of this.

But when he heard his mother cry out in pain, he rushed to the kitchen and struggled to take a knife out of the counter, before rushing to his mother bed. He didn't want to hurt anybody, just to scare the man in black away. But when he saw the man in black on top of his mother, hurting her, all he wanted to do was doing the same.

And then, it all happened in the blink of an eye. His Mama and the man in black turned their head his way. His mother screamed at him to go back to his room, while the man laughed at Jose, making him scream and launch at the man. Without a single effort, he took Jose's arm and twisted it so Jose would let the knife fall. He heard his mother plead for him, but the man slapped her so hard, she fell back on the bed. Then, the man grabbed Jose by the hair and put him in the closet.

Jose screamed, trying to get out of there, but no matter how hard he punched and kicked the door, it wouldn't budge. He started crying, disliking being in the total darkness and he heard the man tell his mother,

"Now, you better make me believe that you like it. Or you'll never see that squirt again!"

Jose kicked the door again, asking to be let out, and he started panicking when he felt suddenly hot. He cried, scared out of his mind because he had problems breathing. It was so hot and so dark. He begged for the man to let him out, promising to be good, but all he heard in response was the man grunting.

And finally, the door opened. The man wickedly smiled at him, before yanking him by the hair and taking him to his own bed. Jose screamed out of pain, a sense of dread terrorising him. He didn't know what would happen next, but it felt like bad news.

The man threw him on his bed and tore his pyjamas off. Then he flipped Jose so he would lay face down on the bed, and he told Jose, "Now be a good boy, or mommy is going to get hurt again."

Jose tried to contain his tears, but he screamed at the top of his lungs when he felt the worst pain he had ever felt in his life. He tried to get away, but the man didn't let him, and only brought him more pain. Never before, Jose had thought that he could hurt so much, even less at such a place, but the more the man moved, the more the pain came back.

After what seemed to be forever, the man left, and Jose did not move a muscle, crying all he could, without being able to stop himself. He tried to control his sobs, but they came back even stronger each time. His backside hurt him so much that he felt he would never be able to ever sit again.

It was only a few hours later, that Jose managed to get up, wincing in pain as he made his way to his mother. He didn't even bother trying to find new pyjamas. All he wanted was a hug from his mother, telling him that everything was going to be okay.

But when he got to her bed, she was sleeping in a weird position. Jose shook her out vigorously, calling out her name, and she blinked awake, looking around her with confusion. Until her eyes landed on her son …

"I'm hurt, Mama," Jose told her, tears escaping his eyes, and she burst into tears, taking him in her arms.

For a long moment, she shushed him, rocking him in her arms, before she took him to the bathroom, and gave him a hot bath that made him feel a bit better in the bum. And as she was endlessly caressing his cheek, she promised, crying

"I will get us out of here, mi principito."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

**10 years old**

Jose was reading n his room, when he heard his mother talk with someone else, putting all his senses in alert. It wasn't much the fact that there was someone in their house that bothered him, he had grown accustomed of their house being visited nightly by various strangers, but the fact that it was the middle of the day. The only person who ever came whenever he pleased was the man in black.

Over the years, Jose had learnt that his name was Andrew, not that it made him any friendlier in Jose's eyes. He hated that man with all the fibres of his body. Several times, his mother had tried to run away with him, and each time Andrew had caught them, making her pay dearly for her impudence. And he never speared Jose either. Soon after the incident with the knife, Andrew brought a friend with him who took great pleasure in spending time with a little boy of barely five.

Jose always did his best to not cry, and pretend that it didn't hurt anymore because he knew how much his mother beat herself over it. He also knew that when Andrew came home, the time he was left alone was because his mother had taken it upon herself and bear more than she was supposed to, in order to spare him. All Jose could do now, was wait for him to get stronger and bigger, so he could beat the shit out of Andrew, and take his mother away from this nightmare. Still, he could do nothing at the moment, other than biting his tongue and wait for his time.

He strained his ear, listening if Andrew had come alone, or if he was about to be used as well when he surprisingly heard that it was a woman talking. His mother and he had been living in the US for more than six years, and Jose had never seen his mother befriend anyone. She barely smiled at the guy keeping the convenience store.

Though he knew he should give his mother at least that little moment of privacy, during which she would get to feel normal and average again, he still listened, putting aside his book. It was useless anyway, he knew that he would never learn to read properly by himself, so he should stop trying.

Surprisingly enough, he heard his mother tell about her story and what brought her to this country. She explained how she had been sold by her family, and how she had to run away in order to protect him. She explained how Andrew unexpectedly found her a few years later, buying her back from her friend's father, and how he brought her here, setting her up in this house as he told her that she owed him twice her debt. She explained how he inflated the debt when he started abusing her son because she refused to sell him the boy to wipe the sleeve clean.

Jose silently listened, shocked that his mother who always kept everything to herself was telling all her life story to a stranger. Hell, there were even things she never told him, her own son. As she kept on talking, Jose had the foolish hope that maybe, she would tell the other woman who was his father, but that moment never came.

When his mother was finished talking, Jose estimated that he could leave his room, and pretend as if nothing, curious to see what the other woman looked like. And he was not disappointed when he saw that she looked like any other woman in this country. Blonde hair, big clear eyes, and rosy skin. The only difference he could note about her was her big belly indicating that she would soon have a baby.

For a minute, he could not take his eyes away from the prominent belly. He had rarely seen pregnant women, and he never saw one up close. He always thought it was weird that a person could be carrying and creating a whole other person in the same area where food was digested, but now that he was seeing a pregnant woman from up close, all he wanted to do was touch her stomach.

Of course, he did nothing of the sort, staying out of range and barely acknowledging her when she greeted him. She left, not without friendly waving in his direction and he went to the kitchen to drink a little water.

"Jose … We are getting out of here. Elena is going to help us," His mother announced, and he simply shrugged at that. They never managed to escape, so why would it be different, now? He highly doubted that a pregnant woman could help them.

He went back to his room and slumped on his bed, not really eager to rehash a conversation about their escape. In his heart, he had made peace with what they had to live night after night and was just biding his time to strike back. He couldn't understand why his mother kept on hoping again and again that they would escape. Especially since she was always the one getting beat up when they were caught.

He started drifting to sleep, though he was still conscious of his surroundings, and he jumped on his bed when he heard the front door smash open, and Andrew's voice roar with rage. He stumbled out of his room, noticing that the sun was still up, and saw the man he hated most in the world hold his mother against the wall, his hand dangerously tightened around her neck.

"Do you care to explain why I have Idris on my back all of a sudden?"

Jose's mother suffocated, turning into an alarming shade of blue, and Andrew let her go. She fell on her knees, gasping for air as she massaged her bruised neck; but Andrew did not give her any rest, and clutched a fistful of hair, forcing her to look at him.

"I want an answer! Why do I have _Raymond Steele_ on my trail, dismantling my very discreet and very secret whorehouses?"

"I have no idea," She cried, scratching Andrew's hand so he would loosen his grip. He brought her face closer to his, his face red with anger,

"You're not going to fuck this up for me! I know it was you! You're the one who's been giving me most troubles. I should have killed you years ago!"

As he said those words, he slapped her, the force of the blow making her fly across the room. Jose rushed to her side, ignoring her plea for him to go back to his room. Andrew watched the two of them, pure fury in his eyes before a vicious smile lit his face.

"You're going to learn to behave. If knowing that your son is following your footsteps isn't enough to make you obey, I will make you watch," He darkly said, and both Jose and his mother froze.

This was a next level vicious. This was something that Jose had never wanted his mother to see. Sure he had learnt not to scream over the years, but that didn't mean that he didn't cry. He didn't want her to have to suffer that after all that she had endured.

"I'm going to teach _him_ what it means to disobey _me_! And if you so much as look away, I'll kill him," Andrew said, undoing his belt.

Jose still did not move, frozen on himself, when he felt his mother hand on his. He looked at her, and she caressed his cheek, erasing his tears as she mouthed him, "Te quiero."

They had never talked about it before or even thought about going separate ways, but at this right instant, Jose knew that his mother was telling him to run. She clenched his hand, and she put something in it; and in the blink of an eye, she charged at Andrew. Jose did not hesitate, not wanting his mother to feel like she was distracting that vicious man for nothing, and he launched at the nearest window. He ran through the streets, perfectly aware, that, though he did not come out often, he still knew his neighbourhood better than Andrew.

But just as he was about to take a corner and make his way to another street, he saw black cars driving down to his street. For a second, he was unsure of what to do. His mother's voice was telling him to run, whilst his instincts were telling him to go back. And in the end, he listened to the later, and rushed back to his place, using shortcuts.

With his heart thumping like a drum, Jose made his way to the back door, doing his best to hear something else that his blood pumping through his veins. He glanced inside, but saw, nor heard no one. So he stepped in, and all his blood left his face. Before any notions of logic or safety came to him, he fell on his knees, screaming out his pain as he saw his mother laying on the ground, her beautiful features erased from her face, and her hair bathing in her own blood.

He felt the tears burn his eyes, but never falling, he felt his lungs calling for air, but never receiving it. All he could do was stare at his dead mother, crawling to her between sobs. He did not care when he heard the door burst open. He did not care when he heard people talking around him. He did not care for anything, but the fact that he had abandoned his mother to die by the hand of that hateful man.

Someone put a hand on his shoulder, but he did not move, taking his mother's body in his arms, his hand trembling as they neared her now-absent face.

"Kid." He ignored the voice, sobbing as tears finally fell down his face. "Kid, we need to go."

"Five minutes tops before the cops show up, Ray. The place is clean, we missed him."

This ought to tear Jose out of his sorrow for a second. When he heard that there were people around him, he assumed that Andrew was still around. But now, it seemed that he simply killed his mother and fled like a coward. And just as he realised that a wave of pure hatred surged through him.

The man by his side slightly clenched his shoulder, making Jose snap his head at him. The other man called him Ray, which meant that he was probably the Raymond Steele, Andrew was talking about. He was probably the man his mother was killed over. The man gently shook his head, and told him, probably sensing Jose's sudden animosity,

"I am not the enemy, kid. I came because your mother asked me to."

"Three minutes! We need to leave now, or we will meet them on the road. And I don't want to have to explain having a corpse in the car," The other man urged.

Jose clenched his jaw, about to scream at the man when he crouched down to pick up his mother. But when her body was taken away from him, he fully opened his hand, and the piece of paper he had been holding ever since his mother gave it to him, fell down. He picked it up, and read with difficulties,

**Elena Kavanagh **

**Raymond Steele **

**Robinson building on 5th Avenue **

Jose assumed that the first name was the name of the pregnant woman who came earlier this day and that maybe, for once his mother had had a real plan to help them get out. Maybe he should have listened to what she had to say, and she wouldn't be dead at this moment.

"We need to leave, kid. But if you come with us, I promise you that you will get your revenge."

Jose blinked, unbelieving. This was what he had been telling himself all his life, and in the end, the one thing he had wanted to do, he miserably failed. He didn't protect his mother. The man seemed to read his mind because he added,

"I will help. I will train and teach you all you have to know for you to get the revenge you want. But we have to leave now."

"I will get to kill him?" Jose asked, not wanting to be robbed of that one last thing he still wanted. The man nodded, presenting his hand as he guaranteed,

"I promise."

Jose looked deep into his eyes, and shook his hand, following him and the man holding his dead mother into a whole new world…

**)Don't be gross, Elena was pregnant with Kate. Don't let your mind go there …)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

**Present day**

There was a long pause after Jose finished the tale of his childhood. He spared Christian the details of how Raymond trained him, of how Elena helped him cope with his past the best she could, of how Carla put down her foot for Raymond to provide with an education that did not involve guns and thievery.

Raymond had wanted to take him to his house, but Jose had refused, so Raymond set up an apartment for him in Elena's building. And despite the fact that he was ten, Jose handled himself perfectly. The moments he liked the most were when Carla came once a week to check on his reading and math progress. She reminded him of his own mother, no matter how much they looked nothing alike.

A few years after being rescued by Raymond, Jose bought back the house he and his mother used to live in and rearranged it the way he knew his mother would have wanted it. He knew that both Raymond and Elena thought it was odd of him, but despite all the bad, it was also the place where he had happy memories with his mother. It was the last thing he could have of her. And he liked to think that her spirit remained in the house after she was brutally murdered there.

Finally, Christian talked, his face unreadable while his eyes were lost in space, "And it took Raymond _all this time_ to locate this bastard?"

"No. When I was sixteen, Raymond came to me one day and told him that he had an address for Andrew. He was in Columbia, recruiting young girls there. He gave me a gun but still proposed to come with me. He bought us the tickets, made us pass the customs with our weapons, but as soon as I got on the plane, I panicked. They had to let me out to take off."

Christian nodded, closing his eyes and resting his head back on the couch. And though Jose knew that his friend was probably trying to assimilate everything that he just told him, he couldn't help but wish that this one the one time Christian would be a bit more expressive. He was the first person he ever told about this part of his life, Raymond and Elena knowing by default.

He had always done his best to never tell anyone, avoiding everything that could lead to people asking about his childhood, and he was feeling that maybe he shouldn't have shared anything with Christian. Maybe his friend was repulsed by him now, or maybe he liked him better when he knew less about him. He wished that Christian wouldn't be so business right now, and showed him an actual emotion. _Any _emotions would be better than this uncertainty.

"So, that means he's in the US right now? That Andrew guy?"

"No. But he's been staying at the same place for quite some time, and Raymond says that he's apparently settling there so … I tried to get there myself. I bought the tickets, packed a bag, but I didn't even make it to the taxi. I thought that vengeance would be stronger than my phobia, but I was wrong."

Jose hung his head low, feeling shame that he couldn't be that simple thing to avenge his mother.

"Do you have an address?" He asked, his tone impassible. Jose looked up, slightly confused. It almost seemed as if Christian was taking this as an assignment, and not a favour, and so he reminded him,

"Christian —"

"I would have done it without the explanation, Jose. Don't misunderstand me, I am glad that you trust me enough to confide in me in what must be painful memories to you. But you are my friend, and I would have gone kill the man whether you would have told me why or not. I trust your judgement."

Jose staid speechless, no expecting this. Though he had always considered himself close to Christian, he never thought that Christian trusted him as much as to not question him if a life was on the line. He watched his friend get up, straightening his suit before he looked at him,

"Do you want him to suffer?"

"I don't care. I just want him to know it was me," Jose said because though he pictured himself pulling the trigger a million times, he never actually thought of the events leading to that moment. He always figured that he would only be satisfied in the act of killing Andrew, not in the moments leading to it.

Christian nodded and started walking away, telling Jose, "You should hear from me in twenty-four to forty-eight hours."

"Thank you, Christian."

"Don't mention it." He was already by the door when he stopped and turned his head to Jose, his face showing emotion for the first time ever since he came into this house, confusion. "I don't want to butt in your love life, Jose. But if this is the thing that you never told Ethan and that drove you apart, I think you should tell him. Andrew took your mother away from away, don't let him take your future. Plus, Ethan would help you deal with this in a way that I can't."

Jose didn't say anything, though Christian was right on the reason why Ethan and he were no longer on speaking terms. But this was the thing, he was scared. Even he wasn't sure if he was gay or not, and he was afraid that if Ethan knew about his past, he would call him on that. After all, Ethan was sure and proud of his sexuality, while he still questioned himself, wondering if he liked men, or if it was just his body responding to something familiar …

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**.**

💚**So, I want to say something here. yes, Jose left when he could have stayed with his mother, but two things are important here first, he is a ten years old who has been sexually abused for six years. I highly doubt (and truly hope) that none of us really knows what this feels like. Second, he never thought Andrew would kill her. He doesn't know who Raymond is yet, and this isn't the first time they are trying to run. Andrew always kept his mother alive. Beaten up, maybe, but alive. He is only ten, and though life is rough on him, his mother tried to keep a little bit of his childhood alive. This shows in this naivety he had. He saw that Andrew was beyond mad, that he was willing to make her suffer emotionally rather than physically this time, but he never imagined that his mother would pay the ultimate price.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Jose's life? Are you crying? Sorry, ii know it was harsh to read.**

**💚Do you think Christian will be able to kill Andrew?**

**💚 I think it is obvious where the story is going, now, don't you think?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_**Guest1**: Well, now you know why he called..._

_**QAZ**: Well, now you know why the sweet moments are gone. This chaptr was anything but sweet, haha. But I also liked the dads being drunk. hehe_

_**Sofia**: Thank you sooo much, And now you know what happened to Jose ... I know it was hard, but necessary_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	34. Chapter 33: Karma

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 33****: Karma (4,3K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So … This is our last Christian chapter … Because the story demands so … Too much violence, Haha, I'm tired, it's the middle of the night, don't mind me. I'm worst than drunk/stone when I'm tired, and I don't even drink/smoke!**

💚**ALSO**‼️**Remember that this story is rated M not only because of lemon but also because of violence and strong content! This story isn't about unicorns and rainbows, and some VERY DARK AND HARD themes are in there! **‼️

💚** Also, remember who Christian is in this story. Sure, he is sweet with Ana and has a sweet side when it comes to those he cares about, but we had a few chapters from other characters point-of-view to show how cold he could get. Christian IS A MOBSTER, and I will not diminish this side of him to make him sympathetic. He has been stated to be ruthless, just like Raymond, and the show is always better than tell, so …**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

**Meet me in the bathroom in twenty minutes. Christian. **

After leaving Jose's house, Christian grabbed a cab and went back to Katherine's wedding, organising his trip to Russia on his phone. He did his best to keep his emotions at bay, and to not overthink of what Jose had just told him, fully aware that it wasn't the time yet for him to let go of his rage.

When the yellow car pulled over in front of the building where the newlyweds had their reception, Christian told the driver to wait for him for half an hour, and he walked straight to the table where he had been assigned. There, he found Raymond I deep conversation with Ethan and Elliott, and he stopped mid-stride. If he did not know better, it looked like his boss was more than tipsy at this right moment, which was a first for Christian.

Still, he made his way to the older man, and put his hand on his shoulder so he could whisper in his ear, "I'm off for the upcoming week."

This seemed to sober up Raymond who whipped his head to stare at Christian. Christian had rarely seen surprised on his boss's face, but he put this one on the fact that Raymond had drunk all day long with his friend, and was less in control of his reactions at the moment. With a little sigh, the older man got up and indicated Christian with his chin to follow him to some area less crowded.

As they walked to a corner of the garden, Christian let his eyes wander to the crowd, as if nothing, and he saw that Ana was sitting at a random table, along with Katherine and Mrs Kavanagh. The three women were laughing at something, Mrs Kavanagh holding a fruit in her hand, demonstrating whatever she was talking about.

"Something wrong?" Raymond finally asked when he estimated that they were far enough from prying ears. Christian shook his head and assured his boss,

"I just need the next week off. Nothing to worry about."

Raymond waited for him to elaborate, sure that Christian wouldn't simply leave without a good explanation, but Christian shook his head.

"It's personal." He knew that Raymond was already aware of Jose's situation and that he would probably put two and two together. If not now, when he will be sober enough. But this was Jose's life, and he had no business going around talking about it without Jose's knowledge. If Jose wanted to tell Raymond that he had asked him to help him out, it should be him who should tell him.

"I figured he'd ask you," Raymond simply said after a few minutes of silence, and Christian replied nothing, not affirming, or denying Raymond's trail of thoughts. The boss sighed a little, shaking his head and added, "Don't be late. You said a week. Ana's birthday is in two weeks and she would never forgive me if I have to cancel her trip to Peru. Especially if it's because you took unexpected vacations."

Christian snorted, hardly qualifying his upcoming trip as vacations, and Raymond gave him a knowing smile, "It is true that you don't know what means the word vacation. I should teach you when you come back."

Christian shook his head, and took Raymond's leave, heading straight to the bathroom. He checked his phone, glad to see that Luke had texted him and that he would be able to travel with his weapon. That gave him one less thing to worry about once he would be in Moscow. His flight was in three hours, so if everything went according to plan, he would be able to go back to his place and grab his emergency bag before heading to the airport.

He waited for Ana for five minutes before she came in and jumped into his arms.

"I knew you liked our last bathroom sex," She commented, before kissing him passionately. He gave her back her kiss, tasting the alcohol on her tongue, and smiling to himself. Ana had always been more libidinous when she had had alcohol.

Still, he broke their kiss before it became too heated, and put her down on the floor. "I sure liked it. But that's not why I want to see you."

She waited for him to go on, and he caressed her cheek as he told her, "I'm leaving abroad for a week or so, and I highly doubt that I will be available."

"Oh," She said, her smile fading. Christian could see the deception on her face and wanted nothing more than to take it away. "Do you have to work even on wedding days?"

"No, no. it's personal. But it's not something I can talk to you about."

"Is it about your parents?"

"_What_? No!" Christian exclaimed, repressing a sigh of exasperation. It wasn't the first time Ana brought the topic of his parents, and no matter how many times he would tell her to forget about it, she seemed to insist on having him look for them.

"It's just something I need to take care off," He explained, hoping that she would drop the issue of his parents.

"But you'll be back for my birthday, right? We're still celebrating together?" She asked, and Christian gave her an honest smile, happy that she stopped talking about his parents.

"Of course."

"Promise?"

"I promise," He assured her before kissing her on the lips.

She smiled with satisfaction, and he left not without pecking her lips one last time. Once he closed the bathroom door behind him, his mood completely changed, set on only one thing, give Jose the revenge he deserved.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

With a small sigh, Christian watched the unconscious man tied in the chair, appreciating this little moment before it even happened. It wasn't the first time he had a guy strapped to a chair, and he doubted that this would be the last time. He loved that single moment when he got to see in the other man's eyes the realisation that _he_ was in control of everything. That _he_ was in power, and the guy was only a pawn in his hands.

He looked at the man, _Andrew_, his imagination running wild with what he could do to him. Christian could tell despite the chair that the man was not very tall. He had a rather average height. But that was the only thing average about the man. Christian had observed him over the past couple of days, and Andrew was a charismatic man. It was more than his handsome features, it was in the way he talked, the way he walked. He had what it took to compel an audience, and this was probably how he convinced most of his victims to work for him.

After checking that all his material was in order, Christian took a towel and placed it over Andrew's head, and he emptied a bucket of water. The man loudly gasped before coughing, but Christian kept the towel over his head. He waited a little for the man to catch back his breath, and reiterated his action a couple of times before finally taking the towel off.

Andrew coughed, gasping for air clean of water, and his eyes frantically looked around before settling on Christian. With a vicious pleasure, Christian saw that Andrew had taken notice of the camera recording, and of the table with several syringes and a few instruments. He waited to see if Andrew would start asking frantic questions, but the man simply tried to sit straighter, giving Christian the challenge he had been looking for. There would be no fun if the man broke down at the first minute.

"Do you know who I am?" He asked with a small smirk on his lips. He watched the man in the eyes, aware that his voice inspired anything but trust. It was his business voice, cold, calculating, and threatening.

"You're not important. Some lowlife criminal who thinks I'm going to give him something in exchange of my life," Andrew dismissed, making Christian darkly chuckle. He loved it when they were so strong at the beginning, sure they would get out. It made their downfall even more delectable.

"Do you know who I work for?"

"Who cares?"

Christian walked to the camera, assuring himself that it caught perfectly Andrew, and adjusted the image when he saw that it was a little bit blurry. "I work for someone very important. Someone who strikes fear by the very mention of his name."

Then, he walked to the table and took a gulp out of his water bottle before he added with a sardonic smile, "But the thing is, I am not here on official business. I am here to do a favour for a friend."

When Andrew remained silent, Christian understood that he was in for a silent treatment, which did not bother him the least in the world. He placed himself in front of the man in the chair, and asked, feigning interest,

"Do you have any idea who that friend might be?"

"I don't know and I don't care. You can't do anything to me without repercussion. We're on my turf," Andrew spat, ripping out of Christian a genuine laugh. For a second, Christian even wondered if this man was serious after all.

"And yet, here you are, in a deserted hangar, strapped to a chair, and at my mercy." He let the words sink, before he added, "Do you really think I would be stupid enough to stay in Russia?"

And finally, realisation dawned on Andrew, making him pale. All along, he had assumed that he would getaway, or that someone would notice his absence and come looking for him. But now, he knew that he was not dealing with an amateur and that he had lost the advantage of being on his own territory.

Christian smirked, and added salt to injury as he lightly explained, "We're in a country who won't give a fuck about extraditing you. A country who won't give a fuck about you, period. And I happen to be on very good terms with some people here."

"You brought us to fucking China!" Andrew cried out, panic showing on his face. He was realising that he was doomed either way. Either he was Christian's play toy, either China got their hands over him, and would sell him to the highest bidder. And when one had the line of work Andrew had, one made themselves many enemies along the way.

"Well, it is just next door," Christian riposted as if he was a simple student doing an expose.

The two of them stared at each other, and Christian decided that it was time to start playing with his food. He walked to the table and put the firebrand on the fire that was heating up next to the table. He was deliberately slow, perfectly aware that one of the best torture was what the imagination could do to the victim, and he said,

"To be honest, you are a very lucky man. See, my friend for whom I'm here has a good heart. A _very_ good heart, and a pure soul. So pure, that torturing you was never even an option to my friend."

He checked on the fire, making sure it would keep on breathing and heating up the firebrand, before he turned his head to Andrew and viciously smiled to him, "Unfortunately for you, you have to deal with me. And I am far from having a good heart, or a pure soul."

Andrew glanced at the syringes, and then at the firebrand heating up, and Christian visibly saw him swallow before he asked, "Are you going to kill me?"

He chuckled, taking a vicious pleasure on seeing fear install itself in Andrew's heart. "You should be worried of what is going to happen to you _before_ your death."

"Are you some sort of doc?" Andrew asked, glancing at the syringes once again. Christian followed his gaze with a small smile before he explained,

"Those are not meant to kill you. Those are meant to numb the pain for a little while, just so you and I can play a little longer. See, I am one of those people who doesn't sleep much at night, and that gives me time to learn so many things while the rest of you are sleeping. For instance, what drugs will keep you alive and aware, no matter what kind of pain I inflict you, or what bone will hurt the most when I will break it."

Andrew' gulped again, and though Christian kept his smile on, he had to admit that he was a bit disappointed. He had hoped to break the man while torturing him, but apparently, just the prospect of it had terrified him. This was going to be quicker than he would have wanted.

"You and I are going to play a game. I am going to ask you for my friend's name, and you will tell me who you think it is. If you're right, I will break something that doesn't hurt much, like your fingers. If you're wrong …"

Christian let his sentence in suspense, his smile more vicious than ever, especially when he saw sweat on Andrew's face as he stuttered,

"I don't even know if it's a guy or a girl! I don't even know you!"

Christian shook his head, pretending to be sad as he reminded the tied-up man, "That's not what I asked for."

Then, he walked to the table and took the flat clip and walked back to Andrew, before hastily securing his hand down in order to remove the nail of his index. Andrew screamed at the top of his lungs, unknowingly indicating to Christian that he had never been tortured before and that he had poor resistance to pain.

He wasn't even bothered by the scream, simply dismissing it as he wiped the clip clean and nonchalantly asked, "The name?"

"I don't know. I don't know."

He had to admit, Christian thought that it was pathetic that he was already so weak, and even disappointed that there was no real challenge in that game after all. But that did not stop him from enjoying every minute of it. This man had wronged his friend in some inhuman and unnatural ways, and Christian would be damned if he didn't make him pay for it.

He put down the clip and took the shears. When he walked back to Andrew, he saw that the guy's first reaction was to try to close his legs, which made him chuckle. He was vicious, but he felt that it would give Andrew too much importance than to focus on this part of his anatomy. Instead, he went for his left ear, and cut it off in one sharp clip.

Andrew screamed again, gasping like a maniac for air while Christian wiped the shears clean, asking as if nothing, "The name?"

"I swear I have no idea!" He sobbed, his lungs still looking for air. Christian waited a little, not wanting for his prisoner to faint out of pain yet, and then took the bottle of pure alcohol and poured it over the open wound. Andrew tried to struggle, but his bonds were too tight.

Without a word, Christian wiped the wound, using a wet towel, and when his question came unanswered once again, he took the firebrand and cauterised the gaping ear. He barely heard the scream, used to that kind of noise, but the smell was still a bit disturbing.

"I swear I don't know. How do you want me to know?" Andrew asked, his nose puffy and dirty, and Christian shrugged, as he retorted,

"_Think_."

He then took the sledgehammer, and violently aimed for his talus, breaking it into pieces. At this point, Andrew's screams had become part of the natural noise for Christian, he barely heard them. But he still revelled in his tears, and in the pure anguish that he could clearly see on the man's face. He wasn't even trying to hide his smile, perfectly aware that the more vicious he appeared, the more Andrew was to fear what worst could come next.

When he swang the sledgehammer again, Andrew rapidly shook his head, enumerating random names, in the hope to hit jackpot, "Jessica. Annabelle. Alice. Ruby. Ivanka. Svetlana. Anong. Jacinta."

"Don't you feel sick to have destroyed so many people's lives, that you can't even remember that one name? Maybe you shouldn't have started in this business to begin with," Christian cut him off, and Andrew blinked away his tears, looking at him with comprehension gleaming in his eyes.

"You work for Raymond Steele."

Christian smirked, knowing that this was one logical deduction. After all, Raymond was known worldwide for his repulsion of the sex-trade, which was an oddity in the underground. After all, most mobsters usually made their money off it, and Raymond managed to beat them all, without selling a single person to this industry.

Still, he saw a sparkle of hope light in the bastard's eyes as he quickly said, "You won't kill me. Not without an audience. Raymond likes to make examples, and he would have to kill me socially before killing me like that. He would want to kill my business first, just so others would know."

"I think you're forgetting something," Christian retorted with a little singing tone. "I told you I wasn't here on Raymond's behalf. I am here for my friend, whose name I am still waiting for."

He lightly tapped the sledgehammer, and Andrew immediately blurted, "_Jose_. Your friend is Jose!"

"Good!" Christian happily said, before swinging the hammer and breaking his hand still holding five nails.

He let the man scream and walked to the table to take a syringe and appease his pain. The fun part was about to begin, and he did not want Andrew to pass out. As he was trying to locate a vein, Andrew spat at him,

"You got your name. Just get on with it and kill me."

Christian viciously laughed, though it was a laugh from the heart, and he shook his head as he put the empty syringe back on the table. "I want more than a name," He said, pointing at the camera.

Andrew glared at it, and shook his head in denial, "I won't apologise. He was a little shit, and his mother was a whore. She was _my_ property, and I do what I want with my property."

"Who said I wanted an apology? Who would believe a word coming out of the mouth of a child molester? I want you to look at the camera, and confess your sins and mistakes."

"Or what? You'll kill me?" He mockingly asked.

"Or I won't kill you. I will keep playing with you. I have all the time in the world, and no remorse when it comes to torturing scumbags like you. I will sleep like a baby when you will be over."

Andrew glared at Christian but did not peep a word, which Christian had expected. With his smile still on his lips, he walked to the table and took the pliers before grabbing Andrew's face by the jaw and forcing his mouth open. "Maybe you have too much in your mouth," He taunted, before removing a tooth.

The tooth was barely out that Christian forced pure alcohol down his throat, sure that the burn of the alcohol of the fresh wound would be worst in his mouth than on his body. When Andrew spat all he could, blood mixed with alcohol and saliva, Christian asked, taking Andrew's valid hand,

"How about the sin of molesting a young child?"

Without waiting for an answer, he took two more nails out of their sockets, and Andrew gave up his attempt to stay dignified in the end.

"I did," He miserably sobbed. "I raped Jose, and many other kids, so it would be easier for me to sell them on the market later."

"How about the sin of thinking a person could be your property?"

Christian saw the hesitation in Andrew's eyes, but as soon as he reached for the pliers, Andrew looked at the camera and said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. I should have treated them with respect."

Christian smiled with satisfaction, and walked to the camera, making sure everything was recorded. "How about the sin of killing my friend's mother?"

"She sold me off! _To your boss_! Raymond doesn't do kindly with pimps!" He glanced at Christian, swallowing as a tear rolled down his cheek. "But apparently, the student has surpassed the master," He added, grinding his teeth.

Christian chuckled, wondering how much longer he could play with his prey.

"You have seen nothing, yet. See, Jose said he couldn't even see his mother's face because the blast erased it." He walked to the tied up man, using another syringe to numb the upcoming pain. "My friend couldn't give a proper burial with an open casket to his mother because of you. He couldn't have one last beautiful image of his mother, because of you. And I'm going to do the same to your family."

And as he said those words, he took the burning iron, and slowly rolled it down his face, burning away the flesh and disfiguring him forever. Andrew screamed bloody murder while Christian clenched his jaw doing his best to ignore the strong smell. He only put down the iron when Andrew passed out, making him curse before checking his pulse.

Once he was done, he went to the camera and ended the recording, before walking back to Andrew. He took a picture of him, dirty, disfigured, bloody and pitiful; and a satisfied smile spread Christian's lips, feeling like justice had been served. The kind of justice that no law in this world would ever be able to give him.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

**💚For those who don't know, Macau is China's Vegas (of sort)**

**Raymond, **

**The package is meant for Jose, but I think it was safer to send it to your place, than his. **

**With it, you will find a little black book,**

**Give it to Mrs Kavanagh, I am sure that she will do a much better job with it than me.**

**There is also a DVD for Jose. Just give it to him, with the package, and he'll know what to do with both of them. **

**I'm off to Macau, check on the casino, and put things in order**

**And I shall be back before the end of the week **

Christian was walking in the streets of Macau, without any particular destination in mind, preoccupied with his problem at hand. He had to 'fire' the manager that had been handling Raymond's casino there. The casino hadn't been bringing any money for the past few months, which was an oddity in itself. Rare were casinos that did not bring money, especially casinos as well placed at the one Raymond had in Macau.

It turned out that the manager was stealing most of the profits, to buy drugs and sell them back. Christian couldn't really blame the guy for trying to double-cross Raymond, it was a bold move. But that did not mean it was something he left unpunished, no matter the guts needed.

But now, he needed to find a new manager, and he hadn't been in Macau for quite a while and therefore did not know whom to trust with the management of an entire casino. He was actually considering going to Vegas and take one of their assistant manager there, to place him in Macau, but the problem was that none of them spoke a word of Chinese. In fact, most of them only spoke English.

He was still trying to find a solution to his problem when he was suddenly taken away from his thoughts by gunshots. His first instincts were to reach for his own gun while taking cover, but before he could do any of that, a bullet hit him.

Christian fell backwards, but strangely, his thoughts weren't on the bullet draining the life away from him. Every single one of his thoughts were of Ana, and how he did not get to hold her one last time.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

💚**So … Hihi, Evil me came back. If you've been following me since the beginning of time, you know that I can be very mean and that I have been fairly nice in this story. There hasn't been that many cliffhangers and the angst wasn't even present (except for Jose). So … I'M BACK! Mouahahhahahah **😈😈😈**(did I mention that I was tired?)**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Christian's torture? I personally, evil and diabolical as I am, loved writing it. It really gave me great pleasure ... I should maybe make this my job, after all.**

**💚How do you think Jose will react to that video?**

**💚 Do you hate me? Hihi**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_**Sofia**: I know, this chapter was so hard, but now, Christian stepped in. A last gesture to give his friend the retribution he wanted..._

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	35. Chapter 34: The Grim Reaper

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 34****: The Grim Reaper (3,7K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So I see that hope is a strong emotion amongst my readers. Which is good. We have a saying in French which says, 'Hope makes one live', and I live by that motto. But … well, I will let you see by yourself. Enjoy the new chapter.**

💚**Also, the story is taking a tiny step back, to when Christian sent the package to Raymond. When he was still all well and alive **😈

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

As Jose made his way to Raymond's office, he wondered what his boss could want with him. He had never been summoned to the mansion, and Jose always did his best to stay away from it. He couldn't really tell why, but there was this aura around the Steele's residence that gave him a feeling of trespassing every time he stepped into their house. Sure, he still had times when he would have to actually go to the mansion, but those times were so few that he could recall each one of them.

Once in front of the office, he knocked and opened the door, but to his surprise, Raymond wasn't in his chair, but on his way out, his laptop in hands. He started walking away from his office as he told Jose,

"Christian sent something for you."

He didn't ask what it was, and simply followed his boss to his cellar. There, Raymond opened a door leading to a dark room, and switched on the light, revealing a box, large enough to fit a man in it. Raymond made a small move with his chin, indicating Jose that this was the package in question, and his first thoughts went to Christian, thanking him for giving him this little something. The undeniable proof that the man he had hated all his life was dead.

He opened the top and repressed a yelp of surprise when he saw that Andrew was still breathing, struggling to open his eyes. He quickly glanced at Raymond, before looking back at the man who had murdered his mother in cold blood. Would he have seen him in the streets, he would never have recognised him. He was missing an ear, his eyes were bloodshot, and most of the skin of his face was gone, replaced by a mass of blisters.

Still not believing what he was seeing, Jose looked away from the face, and his eyes fell on a note, nailed on the man's chest. A simple note with Christian's handwriting, that explained it all.

**Enjoy your revenge. **

"How?" He asked in a whisper, trying to understand how did Christian manage to send a living person in a box from across the glob, or even how he managed to keep that person alive, despite the long flight, and the critical health state.

"Give it to Christian to play with his connections to help those he cares about," Raymond said in a patronising tone. Jose nodded in agreement, his eyes going back to Andrew.

Even though he couldn't talk, it was obvious on his face that he recognised Jose. But seeing him so pathetic, so weak, struggling to stay alive, suddenly made all the hatred Jose had bottled up in him, go away. He wasn't going as far as to forgive him, he wasn't that good, or that stupid, depending on the point-of-view. But he finally felt at peace with himself. The hate wasn't eating him away anymore. Andrew was no longer some childhood monster that could creep on him from the shadows of any streets. He was just a pitiful man who thought that abusing people would make him stronger.

And this was why, it was with a peaceful smile that Jose pulled his gun, and simply shot him in the brain, just as Andrew had done to his mother. It wasn't his first kill, and actually, for a long time, it had bothered him that his first kill wasn't this man who had done him so many wrongs. It wasn't even his most gruesome kill or the one in which he felt his own life might be in danger. But this was the most satisfying kill he had ever done.

Pulling the trigger gave him more than peace or satisfaction. It gave him freedom. He felt free of his past. Free of this label that Andrew had put on him. Free of feeling that everything he was, was due to this child-molester. He was free to be himself and to let the past where it belonged.

As this realisation dawned on him, Jose couldn't help but be grateful to Christian. He had gone to avenge him, to do that one thing he couldn't do, but he still managed to find a way to give Jose what he wanted most in the world. When he had asked Christian to go kill Andrew for him, no matter how much he trusted Christian and was grateful to him to do so, it wounded him. In his ego, in his dreams of revenge. For as long as he could remember, Jose had wanted to kill Andrew, and Christian found a way to give Jose his wish.

Sure, he had played with Andrew beforehand, but Jose had expected it from the moment Christian asked if there was any torture needed. Christian was many things, merciful was not one of them. Jose had actually seen Christian torture people and never blink at the gut-wretching supplications addressed to him.

"This was also addressed to you," Raymond suddenly said, reminding Jose that he was not alone. He turned, and took the CD out of his boss's hands, confused for a moment. But when he looked back at the dead man in the box, his brain did the math. He suspected that this CD would contain a video of how Andrew came to look the way he did before a bullet lodged in his brain.

"Did you watch it?"

"No. Christian's message was clear. _These_," Raymond pointed to the corpse and the CD, "were for you. And _this_ is for Elena."

Raymond played with a little black book in his hands, making Jose frown.

"This is Andrew's agenda. With all his contacts, all the different working houses he has in different countries, many of his important and regular customers. Elena is going to have a lot of fun with that."

"Only Christian can find a way to make something personal, suddenly become business," Jose said, making Raymond agree with him.

He glanced at the CD, wondering if he actually wanted to see what transpired between Christian and Andrew. He had already seen people get tortured, he even already tortured a couple of pimps. But this was a whole different thing. This was his best friend torturing the man who had abused him when he was young, and Jose wasn't sure he was willing to see this.

"I have a meeting with Patrick Hyde," Raymond said, putting the laptop down. "Feel free to leave when you want. I will have Ryan come later on to feed him to the pigs."

Jose watched his boss walking to the door, and suddenly, he was no longer that thirty-one-year-old man who managed to survive as he could in that violent and cruel world, he was a ten years old kid, looking at the hand of a stranger. A stranger who simply wanted to help him, a stranger who promised him revenge, a stranger who helped him bury his mother, a stranger who gave him a roof over his head and food in his fridge, a stranger who went as far as to propose him a family, and did not get obfuscated when Jose refused.

Jose knew very well that Raymond purposely kept him from the darkest part of his life. He knew that it was Raymond who suggested to Elena to train him as her successor. He knew that Raymond had put Ana under his care so he could have flexible hours, and still feel useful. Raymond had watched over him, and it all hit him, making him blurt out,

"Thank you, Raymond. For everything."

Raymond turned his head to Jose, his face closed, as always, before he shook his head with a hint of melancholia, and said, "Don't thank me, yet. You haven't lived enough to understand what it means to be in my entourage."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

With a little sigh of impatience, Jose tapped the dashboard, waiting for Ana to come out of her house so he could drop her off at her friend's place. This was probably the thing he liked less about looking after Ana, she always took forever to get ready, always making him wait for ages in his car. He knew he could simply go wait in the mansion, talk with Gail a bit, or even with Raymond, but he didn't really like going in the Steele house.

So he was stuck on waiting for the girl, while she got ready doing who knew what. This was something he never understood about Ana. She wasn't the type of girls who never left their houses without a ton of makeup on their faces, her hair was most of the times wild, and she didn't even need to pack a bag to go see her friend. How could one tiny person like her could take so long simply picking clothes to wear?

He was suddenly torn out of his revery by Ryan, knocking at the window, which made Jose sigh of exasperation. If Ryan went to the mansion, it meant that Ana had a seance of self-defence with him, which meant that he was stuck for at least half an hour more while she would take a shower. well, at least, the car would smell nice, he liked the smell of her shampoo.

"Boss wants to see you," Ryan said, pointing the mansion with his thumb, before he added, "He's in a foul mood."

"What happened?"

"No idea. He's just in a _really_ bad mood. He's been locked in his office, and he made Gail cry when she asked him if he wanted coffee. Poor girl only wanted to make him feel better."

Jose glanced at the mansion, before thanking Ryan and going in there, hating the fact that it was already the second time he was going in that house, and the week wasn't even over. He walked straight to Raymond's office, hoping that maybe Raymond had calmed down since Ryan last saw him, and he tried to guess what could be wrong to make Raymond lose his temper like that.

For as long as he had known him, Jose only saw Raymond lose his temper over his daughter. He saw him get upset with boys flirting with her, or with staff with wandering eyes. So, it was only fair of him to assume that Raymond's unexpected fit of temper had to do with her, once again.

He opened the door, but what he saw wasn't what he had been expected. He had predicted to see a Raymond red with anger, pacing in his study to calm himself down, instead, he saw a Raymond drinking wine, his eyes dead and his face hard. The man looked up, and when he saw Jose in the threshold, he told him,

"I am going to Macau. I want you to keep an eye on Ana while I am gone. Luke is good, but I trust you more."

As Raymond was talking, Jose's breathing started to become scarce, his eyes had fallen on the particular bottle of wine Raymond was drinking.

Jose knew Raymond's pride in his cellar, he knew that one of the things his boss liked to collect was rare vintage and expensive liquors. But he also knew that he had a small barrel of whiskey for each of his Godchild as well as for his daughter. Each engraved with their date of birth, each put in wood the day of their birth, and each to be opened when the titular would get married. He also knew that Raymond bought a bottle of wine with Christian's birth year, some time after taking Christian under his wing.*** **And he also knew that there used to be a fifth barrel for Michael Steele. A barrel that Raymond drank after the boy 'disappeared'.

*** Wine is one of the only alcohol that you can age in glass-bottle, which is why Raymond bought a bottle for Christian, and not a whiskey because he didn't have the possibility to put the whiskey in wood like he did for his children and godchildren.**

And this was the frightening thing. The bottle that Raymond had bought for Christian was the one on his desk, half empty. Jose's first thoughts went to Raymond discovering about Ana's and Christian's affair and getting rid of Christian. But he quickly dismissed the thought for it wasn't possible for Raymond to kill Christian at the moment. Sure he could have hitmen do it for him, but Jose had the impression that this was something Raymond would want to do himself.

That's when a part of Raymond's sentence came back to Jose, making him pale. He was going to Macau. Jose knew that Christian was in Macau, Raymond had told him the day before, letting him know that his best friend should be back before the end of the week. _Why would Raymond drink his Christian-special bottle and go to Macau_?

Jose shook his head, refusing to believe what his logic was telling him, though his eyes couldn't leave the bottle. Raymond followed his gaze, but the words that Jose desperately wanted to hear never came from his mouth. Instead, he turned the screen of his computer, but at this right moment, Ana popped in, all smiles as she brightly asked,

"Ready to go, Jose?

Jose ignored her, his eyes on Raymond, willing him to refute what logic was saying at this right moment. But once again, Raymond did nothing of the sort, and simply leant his head backwards, closing his eyes as he told his daughter with a saddened voice,

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm going to have to cancel your trip to Peru."

Never before, Jose had seen Raymond so vulnerable, and so, he looked away from the man, his eyes falling on the screen, seeing what seemed the paused image of a security video.

"_Dad_! It's my twenty-first birthday! It's going to take me nine years to have another important birthday to celebrate like that!"

Jose watched Raymond clench his jaw, his eyes still closed as he told his daughter, "I understand. We will go there together when I will get back from Macau."

"_We_? You're taking me?"

And finally, Raymond opened his eyes, only to reveal something that Jose did not want to see, sorrow.

"Christian is dead. Therefore, I have no one I trust to take you on your trip."

For a second, there was a dead silence, before Jose shook his head and simply said, "It's a trick. It's what some people want you to think. Christian isn't easy to kill."

Raymond didn't even bother on looking at Jose, he simply pressed play on the video, releasing the pause, and showing Christian being caught in a street fight, and shot by a stray bullet in the chest. Jose shook his head, refusing to believe what his eyes were seeing, and hoping to see Christian walk it off. But his friend only fell backwards, and then into the lake. He kept on looking at the video playing, waiting for his friend to swim up, but it never happened.

His ears started ringing as his heart beat faster than it should, he could barely hear what Raymond and his daughter were saying. If he hadn't asked Christian to take care of Andrew, Christian would have never been in Macau alone, and he would never have been shot. He only regained consciousness of his surroundings, when he heard Ana tell her father,

"It's okay, Dad. I know you're busy. I will find something to do with Kate and Elliott. I will wait for my thirties to do something extravagant." Then, she turned to Jose, and told him, "We should go. Elliott is cooking tonight, and he's really good with food. I don't want to be late."

Jose numbingly nodded, his ears still ringing with Raymond's fatal words about the life of his best friend.

"I have something to tell Jose, sweetheart. Just give me a minute."

Jose watched Ana glance at the bottle of wine, before she left, her head high, mumbling that she would be waiting in the car. The two men stayed silent, Jose simply waiting for his next order, keeping his emotions at bay. When the minutes passed, he cleared his throat, tearing Raymond out of his thoughts, and asked,

"Are you going to retrieve his … _him_?" He couldn't say the word corpse, it was giving a finality that he was not ready or willing to accept.

"Yes. And I have to finish the business he was on while there. I'll be taking O'Neill with me .." He seemed lost in his world again before he shook his head and took a sip out of his glass. "It's not your fault, Jose."

"Agree to disagree."

"Christian was already planning on going to Macau. You sent him to Russia, not China," Raymond reasoned, and Jose loudly swallowed before he said,

"Your daughter is waiting for me. I should get going."

He started closing the door, when he stopped, realising that Raymond was losing more than his right-hand man, he was losing his son by substitution. Christian might not like admitting it, but to Jose, it was evident that Christian had replaced Michael in Raymond's heart. And now, once again he had to grief a son. He hesitated a moment, but still said,

"I'm sorry, Raymond. I know what Christian meant for you."

Raymond did not say a word, making Jose feel that maybe he had crossed the line. But just as he was about to leave, Raymond silently proposed him a glass of wine, finishing the bottle. Jose almost refused, aware that taking it was admitting that Christian was no longer of this world, but it felt like he would be insulting his friend's memory by doing so. So he took the glass, and drank it in silence with Raymond before he went to his car where Ana was waiting got him in the back.

It was only when he started driving that Jose realised that Ana was not just Ana. She was his best friend's lover. The girl he bent his code for. The girl he risked it all for. The girl he was falling for, no matter how much he was trying to ignore the signs. She was probably broken by the news, and she had no one to help her grief.

He glanced at the review mirror and saw that she was doing her best not to cry, which was probably why she sat in the back. Ever since she was fifteen, Ana always sat in the passenger seat when it was just the two of them, because she didn't want to put invisible barriers between them.

He wasn't sure what he should tell her to make her feel better, because he was suddenly feeling more guilty. If it hadn't been for him, she would be planning her birthday with Christian, and Christian would be doing his best to give her exactly what she wanted.

"Christian had a cat … He will need a new home," He said, knowing that Bastille was a gift from Ana and that she might find comfort in taking care of Christian's pet.

"Christian _has_ a cat!" She snapped, making Jose sigh with a condescending voice,

"Ana …"

"_You know_! He told you about us!" She accused him, catching him off guard. For a moment, he was at a loss, not sure of what he could have said that could have triggered that in her mind. But then, he realised that it wasn't what he said, but how he said it. If he hadn't known about their affair, he never would have used that tone.

"Christian didn't tell me anything that I didn't know. I found you in his bed, he could hardly deny the whole thing. But I still think that he would have wanted you to take Bastille."

"Bastille is where he is supposed to be. Christian will come back, and Mia can take care of him until then," She stubbornly said.

"You saw the video," He reasoned, pulling over in front of the building where Christian used to live. He turned just in time to see her wipe her tears with anger as she declared,

"He promised to come back!"

"Ana …"

"I don't want to hear it, Jose! I don't want your rationalisation or your sweet words of comforts! I want to see my friends!"

And on those words, she stormed out of the car and rushed to the building to go see her friend. Jose followed her there, taking his time and stopping at the first floor to see Mia. And when the blond opened the door, he realised that he was not prepared to break this news to anyone. She watched him freeze as he was trying to will the words out of his mouth, and finally, he blurted out,

"Christian is dead."

Mia blinked, as if not sure of what she heard, before she burst in tears, taking refuge in Jose's arms. He patted her hair while she cried on his shoulder, and he did his best to stay strong, not wanting to break down in front of the young girl.

When she was calmer, he asked, "Can you still take care of Bastille while I find someone to replace you?"

"What about his girlfriend?"

Jose stared at the blonde girl, surprised that she would know about it. "He told you about her?"

"Christian never talks … talked about his personal life. Not much. But I still know that he has … had a girlfriend. _Oh my god_ how is she going to take it?!"

"She .. knows already. She's just in denial. I'm sure she'll ask for the cat in a few days."

Mia nodded, accepting to take care of the kitten meanwhile, and Jose headed back to the elevator. He was waiting to be in the comfort of his own house to break down, but when came the time to press the button to the main floor, he realised that he couldn't go through the night alone. So he pressed the button leading to the Kavanagh floor, and there, he knocked on Ethan's door.

Ethan opened the door, confused as to see Jose there since they haven't spoken to one another since their breakup. But before he could say anything, Jose sought comfort in his arms.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Christian's gesture toward Jose, and finding a way to let him have his revenge after all?**

**💚What did you think of Raymond breaking the news?**

**💚 Do you hate me? Hihi**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	36. Chapter 35: Love Is A Feeling

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 35****: Love Is A Feeling (4,0K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So, just so you know, my reactions in the author notes never reflect about the story as a whole, but more about people's reactions at the end of each chapter. I mean, there is no point in me reacting when I already know where the story is headed. I don't want to spoil the outcome for you, guys. The story is more than finished in my mind, it has been finished and published for another fandom. Me posting it this way is just a favour I am doing because someone asked me too. **

**💚 And though I understand some people being upset and quitting the story, I just have two things to say. First of all, you clearly didn't pay attention to the story and to the way it was laid out from the start. Second, PERSONALLY, it would never come to my mind to stop a story because a character doesn't have the fate I want. I mean, if I had done so, I would have missed on the amazing thing that is the Lord of the Rings, or Harry Potter, or Game of Thrones. Just saying. Sorry, I had to, and because people complaining are guests, this is the only way I can.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ethan's PoV**

Ethan finished his beer and got up, not eager to spend the night with Kate and Elliott. It wasn't that he didn't like Elliott, on the contrary, he genuinely liked the guy and was happy for his sister to have found someone who could make her happy in the way only Elliott did. But he didn't like staying around them when they were so lovey-dovey. And ever since their wedding a few days earlier, Kate was over the moon with joy and love.

They didn't have their honeymoon yet, because Elliott didn't want to miss school, and Kate wanted to tan during her honeymoon; but the couple was definitely in its honeymoon-phase.

Elliott rose an eyebrow at Ethan, surprised to see him already leaving when he had only been home for thirty minutes, and he assured him with a smile, "Don't worry, I'm the one cooking tonight. You can stay without risking calling 911."

Both men laughed, earning a powerful glare from Kate who crossed her arms over her chest and said through her greeted teeth, "For your information, I have gotten a lot better! Roberto says that I am top of my class."

"Maybe. But I will never forget that 'puttanesca' you tried to kill me with," Ethan retorted, using his fingers as quotation marks when talking about Kate's first attempt at a meal. Elliott snickered behind his hand, but quickly stop before Kate could try to blame it on him.

She childishly mimicked her brother, who did not find anything more mature to do than to stick his tongue to her. Kate turned on her heels, flipping her hair while keeping her head high, and she went to the kitchen, while Ethan shouted at her,

"You should ask Jake over. I'm sure he'll be glad to spend some time with you." He knew that if Kate has proposed him to stay for dinner, it was only because she was one of those people who disliked imbalance. She liked things to go by the pair, and if Ana was spending the night with the young couple, her dinner table would not be properly balanced.

Kate came back from the kitchen with another beer in her hand that she gave to her brother, and she let him know, "Jake is out celebrating his victory. He is going to Switzerland next year."

"_What?"_ He cried out, sitting back in his armchair. "Dad gave in?" Kate nodded, her face showing that she was thinking the same thing as Ethan. "Spoilt last kids. Really, they have everything."

Kate eagerly nodded, because this was a conversation they often had as a family. Of course, neither their parents or Jake agreed with them, but Jake had this tendency to always get what he wanted. None of his siblings held it against him, it simply became a running joke among them, that, despite their privileges in life, Ethan and Kate had to fight for things that were given to Jake. And this was the latest example. Both Ethan and Kate had also pitched the idea of a year abroad, but Eamon had been deadly serious about stopping those plans on becoming reality. Jake only had to bat his eyes a little, and he had his year in Switzerland.

"Only kids are also getting spoiled. Look at Ana," Elliott defended, probably not wanting to hear about how last kids were golden children when he himself was the last kid of his family.

"Ana isn't an only child, she is the last child, no matter how much Uncle Ray tries to pretend otherwise," Ethan retorted vehemently.

He had always been bothered by Mike's disappearance. Mike and he grew up together, and up until the moment Mike ran away, they had been best friends. He probably knew more about Raymond than Kate and Jake thanks to Mike, and he couldn't get over the fact that his Godfather simply pretended like his son never existed after Mike disappeared. Even his parents played in this charade, upsetting Ethan even more as the mere mention of Raymond's first son became a taboo topic in his own family.

Still, he felt that he threw an awkwardness amongst them, and so he tried to lighten the mood, not wanting to leave a cold. "I can't believe that Dad got soft like that, though. Switzerland is a long way from home."

"What I can't believe is, it's Dad who's so obtuse about keeping us close, while Mom is always trying to push us out of the nest. She proposed to Elliott and I go to California!" Kate seemed outraged by her mother's proposition, but in all objectivity, Ethan could see why Elena would have suggested the move.

Though Elliott only had one more year as a vet student, and he could do that year in New York, everyone in their family knew that he would have wanted to go to LA to finish college. But apparently, he renounced on this dream of his for Kate, if the bare mention of going away was making her react like that.

So he bounced on another topic, "Mom knows that Uncle Ray will have someone lurking in the corner, no matter where we are in the world. You could try to move into the Amazonian forest, that Uncle Ray would still know about your even move. And Mom knows it."

"You say that like it's a bad thing. But I think that Raymond only has your best interest in mind," Elliott said, making both Kavanagh grimaced. Though Elliott almost grew up with them, he didn't have to endure having someone like Raymond in his family. Elena had known about Ethan's first boyfriend before he even got a chance to tell her about it, and many other examples of the sorts could be given.

With a little sigh, Ethan finished his third beer of the evening and got up, determined to leave before Ana got in. He knew that she would never let him leave if he tried to. And Ana had this ability to make people bend her way, without them realising it. How many times did he end up in one of the girls playdates, along with Mike, because Ana had managed to make them change their minds?

He checked Elliott, before heading out, followed by his little sister who stopped him by the door. "Ethan? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

She looked deep into his eyes, a sad smile on her face, before she told him, "You seem … off lately. Did you break up with your boyfriend or something?"

"Or something," Ethan muttered, not really eager to talk about his complicated life. He had told Kate that he had been seeing someone for a while, but he never told her who it was. And now, it seemed like he had been inspired to do so. He doubted that Kate would find the right words to comfort him, given the fact that she only had one relationship in her whole life, and that relationship ended with a beautiful wedding.

"You want to talk about it?"

"It's nothing, Kate. Don't worry about it," He assured her, not sure what there was to talk about anyway. Jose and he had an argument during which he said words of anger, and Jose never tried to contact him ever since. Did that mean that they were over, or that Jose was waiting for him to be the bigger man and to apologise first?

"Ethan …"Kate started, rating a comforting hand on his shoulder. "You know I got your—"

"You got my back. I know," He cut her with a genuine smile. "And I got yours, no matter what. And I think it's good that Elliott knows that."

They both shared a small laugh, Kate rolling her eyes at his joke. Ethan never had the opportunity to give the overprotective big brother speech to Elliott, because his relationship with Kate came so naturally in their family that no one questioned it. It was as if it was meant to be. And it wasn't such a loss since he got to do it for Ana's first boyfriend as well as for Jake's first girlfriend.

"I better have your back, anyway. Because Jake isn't going to be much help from his Swiss Alps."

Kate chuckled, though the two of them secretly knew that they were going to miss their baby brother during his year abroad. Ethan crossed the threshold and kissed his sister's forehead before going back to his own apartment. Once there, he sat on his couch and flipped through the channel, doing his best to not think of Jose and of their failing relationship.

He knew that he was no white sheep in what happened to them. He did most of the talking and ended up being the one to tell Jose to leave. He went as far as to accuse him of being with a girl who seemed anything but interested in Jose. But there was still this thing that upset Ethan. Jose refused to talk to him. He didn't even try to hide behind eluding, he always straight up refused to talk about himself, about his feelings, about his life. And Ethan was fed up with it. He felt like Jose did not trust him, and he couldn't keep hoping to build a life with someone who obviously did not trust him.

As he kept on going from boring channel to boring channel, Ethan longly exhaled, throwing his head back, and decided to get his night productive. He grabbed his keys and headed to the door, set on going to his restaurant to see how things were going when someone knocked at the door.

His first instincts were not to answer, afraid that it would be Ana who would bat her eyes at him and would ultimately bring him back to Kate's place, forcing him to witness happiness first hand, when he wasn't in the mood for it. But then, he reasoned himself, perfectly aware that a closed door would not stop the brunette.

So he opened the door and was surprised to see Jose on the other side. He immediately froze, not prepared for a conversation. And he was even less prepared for what happened after. Without hesitation, Jose closed the distance between them, and hugged him, hiding his face in the crook of his neck.

For a moment, Ethan was unsure of what he should do or say, but he still said with a wary tone, "Jose…"

A small silence followed that simple word, Ethan trying to find the right terms that would explain his feelings. And suddenly, with a small voice full of pain and sorrow, Jose told him,

"My best friend was killed because of me."

The whisper was so low, that Ethan wasn't sure if he heard it right. He was about to ask Jose to repeat, when the man broke down in tears, frightening Ethan more than anything. Though Jose was rather quiet and distant from his feelings, Ethan never thought there would be a day when he would witness the man he loved cry like that.

With all the compassion and sympathy he could muster, Ethan comforted his lover, not saying a word, but giving him back his embrace. For the longest time, they stayed like that, Jose crying in his arms. It was only when Jose calmed down that Ethan made him step into his living-room, and proposed to him, "I'll make you some hot cocoa, oaky?"

In a heavy silence, Ethan prepared the beverage with some instantaneous powder, and once he gave the mug to the defeated man, he asked, "What happened?"

He saw Jose avert his eyes and hesitate on telling him what he had on his mind, and he repressed himself for bitching about it. After all, this was the main reason why they fell apart. But surprisingly, Jose didn't keep his problems and worries to himself this time, and said,

"I asked Christian for a favour. It was abroad, and he went without a question. Next thing I know, Raymond is showing me footage of Christian being shot in Macau."

"Wasn't Christian supposed to go to Macau anyway?" Ethan had overheard Raymond and Christian talking about some troubles in his investment there. And he knew that one of them was bound to go there eventually.

"He would never have gone there alone if I hadn't asked for that stupid favour," Jose snapped, clenching his teeth with anger. Ethan rested a comforting hand on his knee, and asked,

"What was the favour?"

Jose darkly chuckled, glancing at his mug, before he asked himself, "Don't you have anything stronger?"

Ethan hesitated for a moment, wondering if Jose really wanted a drink, or if he was simply trying to elude once again a direct question. still, he got up and fetched a bottle of scotch with two glasses. He poured one for each of them, and Jose took his, sipping on the amber liquid as he closed his eyes and leaned back.

"I asked him to kill someone for me."

All Ethan could do was stare at Jose, not sure of how he was supposed to react to that piece of news. This was something huge because, beyond their relationship, Jose was dangerously closing on that invisible barrier Ethan had in his mind. During his youth, he had always seen Raymond has a friendly uncle who would pass him and his siblings whatever whims came to their minds.

But as he started working (both at the restaurant and at Robinson Inc'), Ethan heard rumours about Raymond that would give nightmare to his siblings. Of course, with time, he had come to think that it was simply a question of logic and that he shouldn't have waited to be part of the active life to realise who his uncle was, but in all honesty, he did not care. He knew how people perceived the powerful man, but to him, he would always be Uncle Ray.

And now, Jose was springing this on him without warning, confirming to Ethan what he had been suspecting for years now. Jose must have felt his discomfort because he said,

"It's … complicated. I don't even know where to start …"

Ethan did not peep a word, his heart hammering with hope at the possibility that Jose was finally going to open up to him. The Hispanic man served himself another drink before downing it as if nothing, and he took out of his vest pocket a CD that he gave to Ethan.

"I guess I better show you."

He took it, going to his bedroom to bring his laptop, curiosity eating him out. He had no idea what this CD could contain, but he was hoping that all his relationships issues would be over when morning would come. If Jose were in his arms when that would come, it would be even better.

Once back in his living room, Ethan played the CD, all feeling of wellbeing leaving him as he watched more and more of the video. From the corner of his eyes, he noticed that Jose didn't open his eyes, his hand tightly clutched on his drink.

He wasn't sure what horrified him most.

On one hand, he was seeing a side of Christian that he would never have suspected. He knew he didn't know Christian well, but he always thought that he was someone rational and quiet. Which looked nothing like the man who was taking a vicious pleasure in torturing another man. And Ethan couldn't believe that the man who gave his sister her favourite wedding gift could abuse another human being so casually.

But that was also the other horrifying part. From what he understood out of the video, Christian had a very valid reason to torture the man strapped in the chair. And no matter how difficult it was to watch, Ethan forced himself to watch it until the end, his bile catching in his throat when at the end, his doubts were confirmed.

When the video finally stopped, he swallowed with all the difficulties in the world, looking at Jose who still had his eyes closed. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

A rictus ghosted on Jose's lips as he said, "This isn't something I like to think or talk about. And as far as I know, it isn't a great conversation opener."

He poured himself yet another glass of scotch, still avoiding to look at Ethan who felt nothing but embarrassment at that moment. He had pushed Jose, again and again, to talk about his past, when all Jose wanted was to forget about it.

"I wouldn't have pushed like I did if I had known. I would have understood. I am not an asshole, Jose. It's not because I can't relate that I can't be here for you."

Jose muttered something under his breath, but all Ethan could make out of the mumble was his mother's name. Which suddenly filled him with dread. But before he could ask anything about it, Jose cleared his throat and put down his empty glass with determination.

"Anyway … now you know," He said, getting up to Ethan's dismay. He watched the man he loved start to walk away, and he grabbed his hand, stopping him and forcing him to spin to face him, even though Jose still avoided eye contact.

"And what? You think this changes the way I feel about you?"

"Doesn't it?"

"No! I love you! I don't get to chose and pick what your life should be. I love you with your past, with your flaws and your qualities. I love you, and I want to have with you the same thing my little sister has with Elliott."

Ethan watched Jose look down on his feet, hoping that they could put their fight behind them. But it seemed that Jose had yet another part of him to talk about. He darkly chuckled and said,

"But that's the thing. You want a future with me, but I don't even know if I am gay. How do you know that us being together isn't just a consequence of what happened in my youth? How do you know that this isn't just my body responding to something it knows?"

Ethan's heart crumbled into a million pieces. Not so much because his feelings had changed, but because he knew that Jose's answer to what he would say would definitely change their relationship. He hoped it would be for the better, but he couldn't be sure.

"The question isn't much whether you're gay or not. Everyone in their life has a moment where they question their sexuality when they should focus on something else entirely. Do you love me?"

And finally, _finally_, for the first time since he stepped in that apartment, Jose looked up into Ethan's eyes. He could see how devastated Jose felt at the moment, how conflicted, and so he preached his case,

"Do you feel good with me? Do you feel the same peace I feel with you and only you? Do you see a future with me?"

The few seconds that passed before the answer felt like hours. "I do."

Ethan had a brief sigh of relief before closing the distance between the two of them and cupping his lover's face, "Then I don't care about whatever label you want to put on yourself. gay, bi, demisexual. I only care that you love me, and I love you."

He leaned his forehead against Jose's but hesitating on kissing him. After all, he just relieved his childhood trauma, and maybe he wasn't ready to be physical, even if it was just for a kiss. But Jose closed the distance and kissed him. Their kiss was tender, with so many emotions in it. There was the reconciliation, the comfort, and most importantly, the love.

When they broke their embrace, Ethan walked them back to his couch and caught a glimpse of the paused video before closing the laptop. He glanced at his boyfriend, remembering what made Jose come to see him in the first place. And so, he removed the scotch from the coffee table and gently squeezed Jose's knee as he told him,

"Christian would have gone after him, whether you would have asked him or not. Christian doesn't seem to be someone who can let someone who hurt the ones he cares about, live."

Ethan didn't know much about Christian, but he knew that Ethan often talked about his best friend. And from what Ethan could gather, it seemed that Christian cared a lot about Jose. He was actually proven of that when Christian went out of his way to let Ethan believe he and Mia were in a relationship, a few days after Ethan accused Jose of seeing her. Deep down, Ethan had always known it wasn't true, but there was still this dread coming, and though he never told Jose, he still noticed how Christian got Jose's back the same way Ethan would have done it for Ana. Something subtle, and yet clear enough … if Mia hadn't blown his plans by revealing she wasn't even looking for love at the moment.

Jose seemed relieved to hear those words, and Ethan took him in his arms, as he tried to lighten the mood, "I feel for the guy who would have gone after his girl, or after his kids."

"He would have killed anyone hurting his girl, for sure. He was head over the heels for her," Jose admitted with a small voice.

For a moment, neither of them spoke, each lost in their own world. Ethan was trying to figure out how he was feeling about what Jose told him about his past. and the more he thought about it, the more rage was filling his veins. In a way, he was happy Christian did this one thing for Jose. In another, he wished he had been the one to do it. He couldn't understand how someone could be so twisted as to force themselves on another person. Even less when that person was a child.

And suddenly, he found himself thinking about his Mom, not liking how his brain was working at the moment, not liking the resemblances he could see between Jose and his Mom. contrarily to Raymond, or even Eric when he was alive, Elena never talked about her past. It seemed that she started living at twenty, and Eamon always managed to make the conversation drift to him when their parents' childhood was involved. And now, the dots were connecting in Ethan's brain, forming a picture that he wished he never had to see.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

💚**So … we got the words we wanted … not from the characters you wanted, but still, we have those sweet little words.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of Ethan and Jose?**

**💚What did you think of the small glimpse we had of Kate & Elliott and how Elliott fits into the Kavanagh family?**

**💚 What do you think of Ethan's trail of thoughts toward Elena?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but because I hurried to get this chapter out, and it is already past midnight, I am just too dead to respond. I will update again tomorrow, and the day after, but after that, I will go back to answering people_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	37. Chapter 36: Wanted

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 36****: Wanted (1,9K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So, I know all of you want either Raymond's, either Ana's point-of-view, but those are not for now … I am definitely playing with your nerves here, and I am aware of it. Haha. Don't hate me too much**

💚**Also, I think this is the shortest chapter since chapter 1! I am shocked, but it will be worth the next chapter **

💚** Also, I am curious, do many of you actually know/knew Macau? Because I feel so weird explaining to you guys the city when I feel like this city is as famous as Vegas … (But maybe it's just me, let me know)**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**A few texts**

**To Ethan****. So, Ana had her trip cancelled. I was thinking that maybe we could go to Vegas, the three of us. For her birthday. Kate **

**To Kate****. Is she on board with it? What about Elliott? He's her best friend too. Wouldn't she want to be part of it as well? Ethan **

**To Ethan****. I'm sure she will be okay with the idea of going to Vegas. Since when Ana refuses an opportunity to drink? Especially now that she's legal! Kate **

**To Kate****. What about Elliott? Ethan **

**To Ethan****. He won't be able to take a weekend off. That's why I'm asking you. Mia is also swamped by her studies. I don't want Ana to spend her birthday alone. Kate **

**To Kate****. Didn't she plan to spend it alone anyway? She planned to go all the way to Peru on her own. It's not like Christian was going to be any fun for her birthday. Ethan**

**To Ethan****. I know she wanted to spend her birthday alone, climbing some famous mountain, but then her plans went down the hill. I thought it would be nice. Are you on board, or not? She needs a boost. Kate **

**To Kate****. Of course. What's wrong with Ana. Why does she need a boost? Ethan **

**To Ethan****. It's nothing. She's just blue. Maybe she's feeling old. Haha.**

**To Kate****. Haha. Poor Ana. Already feeling old when she's just celebrating her 21 birthday! By the way, are you free this Friday night? Ethan **

**To Ethan****. I'm supposed to be, why? Kate **

**To Kate****. I'd like for us to have dinner. Jake, you and I … and my boyfriend. Ethan **

**To Ethan. Yay! Did the 'something' disappear? I'm so happy for you! Are you going to stop brooding? Am I finally going to shop with your boyfriend, bitching about life and all? Kate **

**To Kate. He isn't the type of gay you're expecting. Far from it. I fit more in your stereotype than he does. And I wasn't brooding! … much. And yes, we worked on the something. Ethan **

**To Ethan****. What was it all about anyway? You know you can tell me, I won't judge. Kate **

**To Kate****. Honestly, it was nothing. Just a misunderstanding that grew out of proportion. We're good now. And I want you to meet him before introducing him to the folks. Ethan **

**To Ethan****. I can't wait! Wait! If you worked things out, it means that you blew me off yesterday night to see him! I don't know if I should be happy for you or offended! Kate **

**To Kate****. You would have done the same to see Elliott, or even to see Ana. so you have no other choice than to be happy for me. Ethan **

**To Ethan****. True. Now, I can't wait to meet him! This is going to be so fun! Kate **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**To Magnus****. I'm sorry for snapping at you, yesterday. It wasn't nice of me, especially knowing your relationship with Christian. Anyway, I am going to stay at Kate's while my Dad is gone, so you don't have to pick me up and stuff, I'll be okay. Ana **

**To Ana****. I did not mind, Ana. And I hope that you will find the strength to grieve soon. The offer is still up, Christian would have wanted you to have his cat. Magnus. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**To Ana****. Hey, I heard that you were freaking out over getting old. Wanna talk about it? Ethan **

**To Ethan****. Good thing Kate never went to college to be a psychiatrist, or she would have gone bankrupt within a year. I'm just being a bratty daddy's girl, throwing a tantrum because my vacation was cancelled. Ana **

**To Ana****. If you wanted to go to Peru so much, we can do that instead of Vegas … Ethan **

**To Ethan****. Honestly? Do you even know your sister? Can you even imagine Kate hiking in Peru? ****Ana **

**To Ana****. Haha! XD Yeah, that was bad thinking on my part. Plus we will get to see the King! Ethan **

**To Ethan****. And CELINE DION! Plus, Dad said that Eric Clapton is doing a round of concerts there, so … you don't have a choice. **😁** Ana **

**To Ana****. I can't believe you're going to make me sit through a Celine Dion concert… **😒** Ethan **

**To Ethan****. Don't you just love me? **😎** Ana **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ryan's PoV**

Ryan watched his girlfriend sitting right in front of him as she was passionately eating her dessert. This was one of the things he liked about Suzie, how she never shied away to show how she felt about food. And man, did she love it!

It was a breeze of fresh air to be with her, after the ten days from Hell he had spent with Raymond in Macau. He had gone there to help Raymond look for Christian's corpse, while Raymond settled the problems he had with the management of his casino there.

Christian's death had been a shock to him when Raymond told him in the plane to China. Ryan had always felt like Christian would outlive them all. First, because he was the healthiest guy he knew. And second, because he was the most cautious guy he knew. And still, Christian died like a nobody, caught in a crossfire.

Ryan's primary mission once in Macau was to locate Christian's body. But Raymond had also asked him to find the people responsible for the shoot. Ryan was sure that a part of Raymond had hoped that Christian had been killed by a rival mafia, giving him reasons to unleash his rage against them. To be honest, Ryan himself was hoping for that possibility. But he had been simple street gangs firing at one another for mater of territory.

Still, that did not stop Raymond from killing them, both gangs, and hanging their corpse upside down where Christian had been shot. And though it had allowed Raymond to focus his rage on something, it did not help find Christian's body. Since he had fallen in the river, the police needed to be involved to make a thorough search to the bottom. But Chinese policemen were not so keen on helping a foreigner, no matter the bribery, and to Ryan's surprise, Raymond did not go in a blinding rage when refused the official help.

He told the young man that he had been expecting much and that this was a recurring problem when he was abroad. Money couldn't buy everything, and apparently, Chinese policemen were not up to sell their patriotism. Which lead to Raymond putting out a reward of half a million for Christian's body in the streets of Macau. Of course, as soon as the amount had been known, people showed up with corpses of all kind, disregarding the description that had been given, and Ryan had to look at each of those fake Christian, denying money to all those frauds.

Though he usually liked working with his boss, Ryan did not appreciate his week in Macau. Despite mourning his friend, he had to endure Raymond's foul mood. The older man had patience for nothing and snapped at the most ridiculous things. Ryan knew that it was Raymond's way of grieving for a man that had become dear to him, a man that had been supposed to take over his place when he would be too old for the gig. Raymond lost more than a person dear to him, he also lost a successor, and so he had to find someone else of trust that would be able to handle both official and unofficial businesses.

Ryan knew that Christian had been supposed to take over Raymond's shares in Robinson Inc' when the time would come, and manage it in Ana's name, holding a ten per cent interest for himself. As for the mob business, Christian was simply supposed to take over, putting some money into unknowing and innocent Ana's account and keeping an eye on her wellbeing from afar.

Now, all of those plans that Raymond had meticulously planned were void, and in need of reprogramming.

With a sigh, he came back to the present moment, smiling at Suzie. And when she smiled back, he couldn't help but say, "I'm going to marry you."

Suzie burst into laughter, shaking her head as she said the obvious, "Well, here is something coming out of nowhere."

"No, it's not." She looked at him, waiting for him to drop a joke like he usually did, but instead, he leant over the restaurant table and took her hand. "My friend died a couple of weeks ago. And … it made me realise how short life can be. _Especially_ in my line of work. He wanted a family, with kids and a wife. And he was so obsessed with work that he didn't even have a girlfriend to mourn him. I don't want that.

I knew I was going to take you to my bed the moment I laid eyes on you. Just like I knew we wouldn't be a one-night stand the moment you talked to me. And like I know now, I am going to marry you."

Suzie stared at him, a bit taken aback before she gently smiled to him, and squeezed his hand. "This is grief talking. You know what they say about grief and relationships."

Ryan shrugged it off, mostly because he didn't really believe in all that psychoanalysis bullshit. But he knew she did. He leant to kiss her, and he told her, "I don't care. I'm just letting you know that at some point, in the future not so far, I'm going to drop on one knee, and flash a diamond ring to you. So you better prepare."

"So I still get the romantic proposal?" Suzie smirked, recovering her sass that Ryan loved so much.

This was one of the reasons he knew he would marry her. And he knew she was perfect for him. She was perfectly aware of who he was working, and she was okay with it (maybe it had a little to do with the fact that she used drugs once in a while). And most importantly, she didn't hesitate on calling him on his bullshit, or on putting her foot down when she wanted something.

"You bet you do!"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the texts?**

**💚What did you think of the small hope I am giving you? (I know, I am the devil, and I am playing with your feelings)**

**💚 What do you think of Ryan and his way of thinking?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but because I hurried to get this chapter out, and it is already past midnight, I am just too dead to respond. I will update again tomorrow, but after that, I will go back to answering people_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	38. Chapter 37: Happy Birthday

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 37****: Happy Birthday (2,9K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So … I lied. We are still going to get many many chapters from Christian's point-of-view, hihi **

**💚And for those wondering about Ana and her Vegas plans, it wasn't her idea. It was Kate trying to take Ana's mind off things. And it is very easy to fake enthusiasm by text. **

💚**Also, the next chapter is going to be very short, but with a rather long author's note, please read the author's note as well!**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

Christian looked at Ana, peacefully sleeping in her bed, her hair spread on her pillow, and finally, a feeling of peace flowed through him. Nothing compared to that feeling of seeing her well and alive. Not breathing back to life, not being stitched up to health, not recovering from his wound. Nothing gave him this feeling of ease and wellbeing as much as seeing Ana, even if she was asleep.

And this was how he knew he was in love with her. She had been his last thought when he thought he was about to die, and his first thought when someone had fished him out of the water. In all truths, she had been a constant thought for him all the while his convalescence. It wasn't the perspective of shooting back those who have shot him that helped him get back on his feet, but the sweet _sweet_ goal of seeing her again.

Silently, he knelt by her bed, a small satisfied smile on his lips, and he lovingly brushed the few strands of hair hiding her face from him. Never before he would have thought that such a simple situation could bring him so much pleasure. He longly looked at her, drinking the sight of her and not caring the least in the world if she would call him a creep if she knew.

As he was endlessly watching the girl he loved, his thought drifted to Macau and how he almost never got the possibility to watch Ana sleep again. He had been very lucky to have been fished out of the water, and even luckier to have been fished out by someone who knew a thing or two about medicine. Ping, the man who took care of him during his convalescence.

He was a villager from continental China who served as a doctor for the whole village, despite the fact that he had no medical training whatsoever. Though Ping had told him several times that it wasn't necessary, Christian had no idea how to thank the man for saving his life. He had no illusion that if Ping hadn't been there, he would have died, drowning and decomposing amongst the fish.

When he got back to the living city of Macau, Christian heard the rumour in the streets that Raymond was offering half a million dollars to anyone who would bring him his corpse. He knew that his first move should have been to go back to his boss and to let him know that he was alive and kicking, but he didn't. Instead, for the past two days that he had been on his feet, Christian travelled through Eurasia, only thinking of Ana.

As if she knew that he was thinking of her, Ana stirred a little in her sleep, her eyes fluttering open before closing again, sleep obvious on her face. Christian simply smiled, trying to not overthink of the warmth growing in his heart, and suddenly, she opened back her eyes, all trace of sleep having vaporised. She stared at him for half a second and jumped in his arms as soon as her brain confirmed that it was really him at her bedside.

"I knew you weren't dead," She whispered in his neck, holding him even closer to her. "I knew it. _I knew it_!"

Christian chuckled, stroking her lower back as he pointed out, "For someone who was so sure of herself, you seem pretty relieved."

She broke their embrace, slapping Christian on the chest, and he had to repress himself from hissing with pain. Still, his face showed his discomfort, instead of being its usual unreadable self. Ana looked where her hand had hit him, clearly connecting the dots, and Christian stopped her from saying anything by doing what he had wanted to do for a long time.

He kissed her.

She left herself melt under his kiss, bringing her hands around his neck and deepening, even more, their kiss, and Christian relished in that act. At this right moment, he didn't care about anything, but the woman in his arms. Still, he broke their kiss and leant his forehead against her, looking deep in the blue of her eyes and internally thanking Ana for sleeping with her curtains open, unknowingly letting him see her even better.

"Happy birthday," He softly said as he took out of his pocket a small box. Today was her birthday, and once again, he thanked his lucky stars to have made him heal at the rate he did. Any day longer, and he would have missed it.

She brightly smiled as he gave her the box, but barely looked at it. instead, she looked at Christian as she told him with pride, "I knew it. I told Kate over and over again that you would be back for my birthday. You promised."

"I did promise you." She smiled even wider, happy to see that her reasoning hadn't failed her, and though Christian knew that it was naive of her to think like that, he didn't try to debate with her. Mostly because he liked how highly she valued his word, and how much she had faith that he wouldn't break it.

She opened the box, curiosity painted on her face, and took out of it a silver charm bracelet with a little Eiffel Tower and a small Japanese Temple hanging. Christian took it from her hand to clip it on her wrist as he explained,

"I had already bought the bracelet before leaving New York. The Eiffel Tower and the temple are both from their respective countries."

Ana's smile widened even more if this was even possible, and she admired the small charms, reminding them of the good times they had together while abroad. But then, she suddenly frowned and glared at Christian,

"When did you have time to buy the charms?!"

"During the last two days."

Without any warning, Ana threw the empty box at Christian's face; and as he massaged his injured forehead, she accused, "You could have been home two days ago!"

"I thought you knew I wasn't dead," He reminded her, not thinking that she would have been that affected by his absence. She blinked, sniffling a little before looking down her hands.

"Still. I would have liked better to have you back two days ago than to have the bracelet."

"I'm sorry," He apologised, leaning his forehead against hers and sweetly rubbing her nape. "I just wanted to get you your present on your birthday."

She nodded, caressing the bracelet but keeping her eyes down. Christian forced her to look up, and once he was sure he had all her attention, he told her from the bottom of his heart,

"I missed you." He kissed her, putting in the kiss all the angst he felt when he thought he would never see her again. "I really thought I was going to die, Ana. And all I could think about was you."

"Really?" There was a mix of joy and hope in her eyes, making Christian's heart swell. He nodded, and Ana announced,

"You're not allowed to die, anyway. I _forbid_ it." Christian laughed with honesty, but Ana only shook her head and affirmed, "I'm not kidding! I want you to promise me you won't let a stupid bullet kill you like that!"

Christian caressed her face, trying to ease the panic he could hear rising in her voice, and he promised, "I'll do my best."

For a moment, they silently battled, Ana clearly not satisfied with this answer. But after a few seconds, she gave in, and changed the topic, knowing that the promise Christian made her was the best she would get,

"I missed you too. Especially since Kate kept on trying to make me accept the fact that you were dead. It was really annoying that she didn't believe me, and expected me to believe her."

After those words, she fondly caressed the side of his face, his usual stubble having grown into a fuller beard and scratching her palm. She didn't seem to mind, gently smiling at him while they kept on staring at one another. She leant toward him and gave him a gentle kiss. But what started as an innocent and chaste kiss, quickly turned out to be more.

Without any of them really aware of how anything happened, Ana found herself on her back, with Christian between her legs, passionately kissing her and bringing her closer to him than it was possible. When Christian broke their kiss to suckle on the sweet spot she had on her neck, she couldn't stop the moan that came out of her, and though Christian knew he should try to keep her quiet, at this right instant, he didn't care, and so the rational part of him assured him that Raymond wouldn't hear a thing since his room was on the other side of the mansion.

Ana tried to help him out of his shirt, but Christian stopped her and pinned her hands against the mattress, taking complete control of their intercourse. Gathering both her hands above her head and within one of his, he slowly pecked his way down to her breast, pulling up her nightgown, before his free hand wandered down to play with Ana's sweet little nub.

Ana started to trash and pant when he pinched her clit, and he took it as his cue to go down, and pleasure her like he liked to do so much. He played with her, completely lost in the moment and loving all the little moans she had, and the more she was trying to keep quiet, the faster his fingers went inside of her. Until she couldn't hold it anymore, and climaxed, milking his fingers and biting on her hand.

Christian let her ride out her orgasm, kissing his way back, and when they were kissing again, Ana unbuttoned his shirt while he was aligning himself with her folds. They looked at each other, and Christian penetrated her with one hard motion, relishing on this sensation of feeling complete once inside of her. He rammed into her, loving how tight she was, how hot she was, how wet she was; and when he saw that she was reaching her climax, he increased his pace.

She closed her eyes, but Christian cupped her face with one of his hands, and blurted, "Ana, baby, look at me."

She immediately opened her eyes, and as soon as she did, she came undone beneath him. And that's only then that Christian realised his mistake. He felt his own orgasm build up, but retrieved last second, finishing in her stomach instead of inside of her.

Then, he collapsed next to her, and Ana immediately snuggled against him as the two of them were trying to catch their breath. After a minute or two, Christian looked down, seeing Ana's head on his chest, with her eyes closed and a happy satisfied smile on her lips.

"I didn't plan for this to happen," He let her know because the primary reason why he came to her room was to see her. Having her wake up was a bonus, and what just transpired was yet another bonus.

"I'm certainly not complaining. I like it when you let go. It makes me feel … _special_."

He kissed her forehead and reached for tissues, before wiping her stomach as he apologised, "Sorry about the mess."

Ana looked at him with a smug smile as she said, "I'm certainly not complaining. Who knew that feeling your monster-cock like that would make me feel so _great_."

Christian kissed her, keeping his hand on her cheek when he stopped and looking deeply in her eyes. She seemed so happy at this moment. She curled up against him, making him lay back down as she pointed out,

"This is the first time you're calling me 'baby'." He nodded, and she kept on going, "Why is that?"

"This is the first time I realised how much you mean to me."

He saw Ana grin with delight, making him smile at her bliss, and he gently rubbed circles on her arms, waiting for her to fall asleep. As if she heard what he was thinking, she declared, "I'm not going to sleep."

"Why not?"

"I don't want you to go. What if this all a dream?"

"I don't have to go. I can stay if you want," He told her, perfectly aware of the double meanings behind his words.

She seemed to think about it, and though Christian would like it better if they came out of the closet, he had decided to go with whatever decision she would make. Almost dying had put some perspective on his life, and being with Ana was the major one. He would rather see her in secret, than fight with her and risk losing her. This was one thing he was not ready for.

"I don't think it would be a good idea for you to 'stay here'. No matter how sad Dad was over your 'death', I don't think he would appreciate finding you in my bed."

"Okay," Christian agreed, and he saw the faint surprise in Ana's eyes to not have him argue over this. After all, this topic was the only thing that actually started an argument between the two of them.

"You don't have to leave _right now_, though!" She exclaimed, fearing that he might have misinterpreted her words, and Christian shook his head, assuring her that he was not moving for the moment.

She cuddled, resting her face against his chest and drawing lines on his chest like she did every time they pillow-talked, and she nonchalantly let him know her plans for the upcoming weekend, "I'm leaving for Vegas tonight. Since Peru was off, Kate organised this little weekend with friends for my birthday. She's trying to cheer me up. And Dad is coming with us."

"Friends?"

"Well, Kate wanted Elliott to come as well, but he's working on his thesis or something like that, so he'd rather not be distracted. And Kaelie … she said she wanted to study, but I think that she isn't really in the mood to party with you being dead and all. So it's going to be Kate, Alec and I."

Christian hid his surprised at Ana's comment concerning Kaelie. He never thought that she would be affected by his death. In fact, he didn't think anyone but Bastille would be affected by his death.

"Will you join us?" Ana asked, hopeful.

"Probably." He had figured that Raymond would go to Vegas at some point after he learnt in Macau that the casino manager problem had been taken care off. Though he did his best to keep a low profile, he saw that the manager he had fired had been replaced by Paul who used to take care of one of the casinos Raymond had in Vegas. Which meant Raymond needed to go to Vegas to find a new manager for his lacking casino.

And though he couldn't assert it at a hundred per cent, he knew that as soon as he would show up, Raymond would ask him to join him to Vegas so they could find that new manager together.

Suddenly, Christian shivered, feeling Ana's fingers delicately trace the line of his fresh wound, still cicatrising. He looked at her, but she was mesmerised by the wound, swallowing hard. It just above his pectoral, and according to Ping, he was lucky that the bullet did not touch any major veins. He could have lost either the use of his arm or even worse, his life.

He took her chin between his fingers, forcing her to look at him and to tear her gaze away from his forming scar, and he assured her, "Don't worry about it. I made it out alive, and now, it's all in the past."

She nodded, and Christian saw that her eyes were teary. He gently caressed her cheek before kissing her with affection.

"Christian …" she looked for her words, apparently unsure of what she wanted to say. "I'm so happy that you're here."

"I'm just happy to be with you," He honestly responded, keeping his hand on her cheek and looking deep in the blue of her eyes. If he had to pick a moment to die, it would be right then. Looking at the woman he loved.

Ana smiled to him, and quickly pecked his lips before she teased, "Well, don't die, and it's a done deal."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

💚**So, Christian is alive! Yay! First off, congrats to all of those who remembered that the prologue was in his point-of-view, about something that we still did not witness. second, read the author's note in the next chapter, it's really important!**

💚**And the next chapter will be a new point-of-view, if you guess, you get a surprise **😉

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the reunion?**

**💚What did you think of the gift Christian had for Ana?**

**💚 How do you think Raymond will react?**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

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‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry, but because I hurried to get this chapter out, and it is already past midnight, I am just too dead to respond. Next update, I will go back to answering people_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	39. Chapter 38: Birthday Morning

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 38****: Birthday Morning (2,7K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE VERY END‼️**

💚** So here comes the important Author's note. When I first started thinking about this story, I had planned for Christian to die at that moment. He and Ana would have gone further into their relationship, the big L would have been exchanged, and Christian would have had proposed when he would have come back. But of course, that never would have occurred since he was killed, and Ana would have been left alone, learning a couple of months later that she was pregnant with his kid. I actually had a whole skeleton for that particular storyline, and it would have been very angsty, but beautiful. But then … I changed my mind, and I decided to write the story we have now (hence this particular epilogue). I am still going to write my angst at some point, but Christian isn't going to die and leave a pregnant Ana. So … I just wanted to let you know how the story could have turned out if I had started writing it a few days earlier, and well … let me know what you think.**

💚**Also, the chapter isn't as short as I thought it would be, so that's a good thing. And before anyone tries to say it's filler, it's not. Something important is evoked in this chapter, that will impact the story at some point. So … **

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**Gail's PoV **

Gail was icing the muffins she made for Miss Ana's birthday all the while listening to some R&B music in her iPod. It was still rather early, and Miss Ana was not a morning person. As for Mister Steele, she had barely seen him during the last past three weeks, which wasn't so bad all in all. More than once, her boss scared her, and she had found herself impatiently waiting for the moment he would die and his daughter would take over the household.

He wasn't a violent person, and he paid her more than well. Thanks to him, she could put both her twins in private schools, which she would never have been able to do if she wasn't working for the Steele family. After all, being a single mother was usually known to be tough on the money.

Mr Steele had provided Gail with a small space in his mansion, where her kids and she could live, and no matter how scared she could be of her boss, she knew that at least her children were somewhere safe. She wasn't some dense woman and knew perfectly well what kind of activity Raymond Steele gave into, and maybe this was why she was scared of him. More than once, she had to clean blood out of his shirt, or out of his basement's floor, confirming to her that Raymond Steele was not a man to disappoint.

Still, in the few years that she had been working for him, she had learnt to keep her apprehensions to herself. The few times he had seen her sons, he had been extremely pleasant to them, which didn't come as a surprise to her. Raymond was a scary man, a man who did not hesitate to resolve to murder, but he loved children. She could tell whenever one of his Godchild would drop by, and she could tell even more by the way he and his daughter were.

Gail had seen Mr Steele interrupt countless meetings just because his daughter needed him, even if it was just to help her reach a book on the top shelf of her library. She had seen her boss go out of his way to give his daughter what she wanted. In all honesty, she thought that, no matter how nice she was, Miss Ana was a bit of a spoiled child. Whatever her demand was, Gail had never heard Mr Steele say no to his daughter.

And her birthday was the latest example. The trip she had planned had been cancelled, and so she had decided to go to Vegas. To which she asked her Dad to come along, despite the fact that he was still grieving and probably not in the mood to party and celebrate. And to no one's surprise, Mr Steele said yes to his daughter.

"Muffins?" Mr Steele asked behind her, making her jump slightly before she retrieved her earbuds.

"I figured that since I was not going to bake the cake this year, I should at least bake some muffins for her birthday," Gail explained. Mr Steele nodded, snatching a muffin out of the plate, and she smiled to herself.

Miss Ana had declared war on her father's diet a few months ago, controlling the amount of sugar and fat he ate, and every time she would sleep out of the house, Mr Steele would ask for a fat meal. So he was probably enjoying this little dose of sugar before his daughter nagged him about it. And though she never said anything, Gail thought it was sweet of Miss Ana to look after her father's health like that.

She picked up the tray with water and freshly squeezed orange juice to put in in the dining-room, but there, she dropped it, screaming her lungs out and rushing out of the room. Within a second, Mr Steele was by her side, his gun out while she was clutching her heart, and she simply pointed the dining room, where there was a ghost sitting on a chair.

When her breathing had calmed down a few seconds later, she peeked through the door and saw that the ghost was still there, looking at Mr Steele with a smirk, before he folded the newspaper and put it down on the table. _So this is where the newspaper went,_ she thought

"You need to have a talk with Luke, it was way too easy for me to break into your house," Mr Grey said in a voice that sounded nothing like a ghost.

Mr Steele looked at him, before putting his gun down, and walking to his right-hand man. Though she knew nothing about business, or about mobsters, Gail was clever enough to know that Christian Grey was Raymond Steele second in rank. She was also clever enough to know that no matter how cold her boos could appear to one, he deeply cared for the young man, and she was actually ready to put her hand to the test to say that he loved him.

She had heard that Mr Grey had been killed, which explained why her boss had been in a sullen mood for the past three weeks. Now that she was thinking of it, she felt stupid to have reacted like that. But seeing a dead man sitting casually at the dinner table could be spooky to anyone.

"Is this really the first thing you're going to tell me? My security system is lacking." As he said those words, Mr Grey got up, and the two men embraced with much macho and testosterone. When Mr Steele tapped on Mr Grey's back, the latter one made a face of discomfort and sat back in his chair.

"So what happened?" Mr Steele asked, and Gail judged that their moment of intimacy had passed and that she could enter the room without them feeling embarrassed by their display of feelings. though, if her opinion was asked, more feelings could have been shown that a simple embrace.

"I got lucky," Mr Grey said while Gail crouched and picked up the biggest pieces of glass. She felt the two men looking at her, but ignored it, like she always did.

"We will have breakfast in the kitchen, Gail. Three people."

She nodded, still picking up while Mr Grey explained that he had been lucky enough to have been fished out by a doctor of some sort. When she had taken most of the pieces of glass, she left to go back to the kitchen, not without warning the men to be careful at the tiny pieces of glass still there, as well as that puddle of orange juice.

In the kitchen, she dressed the table for three, squeezing new oranges. As she did so, her thoughts wandered to the not-so-dead Mr Grey. She wondered if she would have been sensitive to his charm if she had been younger, and without kids to think about. He was tall, handsome, his face always nicely shaven. But then, she realised with horror that, though he looked nothing like him, Christian Grey reminded her too much of Raymond Steele. He was scary as well.

In all the years, she had been working here, and she had seen him come to the mansion to be with their boss, she had _never_ seen him smile. Not even a smile out of politeness. The only 'smiles' she ever saw on his lips were smirks, and she never qualified those as smiles. A smirk wasn't genuine, unlike a smile.

There was also that aura around Mr Grey. He wasn't someone to mess with, she could tell that much. Even if he had always been polite with her, and never raised his voice at her, she knew that she wouldn't feel comfortable around him.

Once the table was ready and only waiting for people to sit there and eat, Gail took the mop and went back to the dining-room to announce breakfast was ready. She knew that Mr Steele liked to wake his daughter up on her birthday, so she did not rob him of that. But before she could say anything, she noticed that all the small pieces of glass had been gathered on the fashion page of the newspaper. The two men were talking about Vegas (Mr Grey apparently tagging along on the trip), completely ignorant of her, but Gail knew for a fact that her boss did not do it.

"Breakfast is ready," She said, making the two men turn their heads to her. Mr Steele got up with the young man, and said,

"Go wait in the kitchen, I'll wake Ana up.

Mr Raymond left, and before doing the same, Mr Grey stopped at Gail's level and told her, "Sorry for the scare. I thought Raymond would be there before you."

"It's okay," She stuttered, and after he left, she mopped the mess and picked up the newspaper filled with glass.

When she went back to the kitchen, Miss Ana was still not there, but her father had joined Mr Grey, and the two of them were talking the status of various schools in China. Gail served her boss his coffee while he took yet another muffin, and she was about to serve Mr Grey as well when he stopped her with a shake of his head.

"Christian belongs to that strange species that doesn't drink coffee," Mr Steele explained, making Gail inwardly smile. More than once, his daughter had complained about not understanding people who did not drink coffee, and when he was saying stuff like that, it was when their similarity was shown best.

Gail went to the stove to boil some water, when Miss Ana came into the room, rubbing her eyes and her hair all messed up. She sat at her place. Barely aware of her surroundings, but when her eyes on Mr Grey, sleep suddenly disappeared from her face, all blood leaving in an instant. And at this right moment, Gail knew she didn't overreact when she thought she had seen a ghost. Miss Ana was clearly having the same experience.

"Christian … I thought you were dead," She squeaked. As Gail had expected it, Mr Grey did not seem surprised by her reaction, barely acknowledging her presence.

"It appears that everyone thought so," He simply said, drinking a glass of water.

The water whistled, and Gail took it out of the fire, and after she poured some in Mr Grey's mug, she started making her way out of the kitchen, when Ana said, "Why don't you sit with us, Gail? The more the merrier."

She glanced at the girl's father who simply showed a chair to her, and so she sat next to Miss Ana, wishing that she had left before the girl came in. She felt awkward and out of her place.

"So, Ana, I was telling Christian that he is coming with us to Vegas."

"Why?" She squinted her eyes at her father.

"We have some business to attend to."

"You _promised_! You promised that you would spend the day with me!" She accused, using her spoon to accentuate her words.

"I will spend the day with you. But the day after, I have a small meeting that will barely last a couple of hours."

The young girl nodded while Gail silently ate a muffin. For a little while, they all ate with only Ana talking about how she was excited to see Eric Clapton that very same night. The day before, Gail had asked the young Steele why she didn't go that day, so she would really celebrate her birthday in Vegas, and she said that she wanted to play, and she didn't want to have to fight if she one but was not fully twenty-one yet. Which Gail found funny, because Miss Ana had been drinking for as long as she had been working here, and she never seemed to think about the age limit in that case.

Suddenly, Miss Ana reached for the muffin her father took, glaring at him as she darkly said, "It's your fourth muffin. The doctor said to watch your sugar intake."

"Sweetheart, it's your birthday."

"Yeah. _My_ birthday. On your birthday, I will let you gorge yourself like Gargantua. meanwhile, you live like a monk."

And there it was, the first genuine smile Gail ever saw on Mr Grey's face. It was brief, and she doubted anyone even saw it, but it had been there. A small smile at the banter between daughter and father.

Mr Steele was about to argue like he often did when his daughter interfered with the way he ate, but she stopped him, "I swear Dad if you die of some stupid disease, I will never forgive you! I won't go to your funeral, I won't visit your grave, and I will never talk about you to your grandchildren!"

"One muffin isn't going to kill me," Mr Raymond reasoned like he did so many times, and oddly, this time, Miss Ana caved. She pushed the plate of muffin toward her father, though she was glaring at him. And just like that, she won, he put back down the muffin with a loud sigh but earning a bright smile from his daughter.

"Anyway, what is my present?" She eagerly asked, and for one, Gail was curious. She knew that Raymond Steele was extravagant, and she had no idea what he had thought he would give his daughter for her twenty-first birthday.

"It's a surprise," He smugly replied, making his daughter sigh in defeat. Mr Grey suddenly looked at his watch, before getting up, and saying,

"I should get going. I have a lot to do before takeoff."

"Didn't you just come back from a trip? What more can you pack?" Miss Ana asked with disbelief, and her father answered for Mr Grey.

"Maybe he wants to pay a visit to his friends who thought he was dead before embarking on another plane…"

"Oh."

Mr Grey politely nodded at the table as he said, "I'll see you at the airport." He turned to her. "Gail."

"Don't forget to bring me a gift," Miss Ana sing-sang as he left the room, making her father roll his eyes at her. She had always liked gifts, and though she liked Christmas, birthdays were her favourite days.

"What? I think it's completely normal for him to buy me a gift. I mean, it's my birthday," She said with an innocent smile. "So … you must be happy he's not dead after all…"

"I am. I'm actually glad that he survived. I did not like the consequences that his death was putting in my life," Mr Steele said, looking at his daughter straight in the eyes. She stared back, gulping down her last muffin, and then she got up, and turned around the table to kiss her father's cheek as she said,

"Well, good thing he is alive. Now, I can go to Peru again."

_._

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed💚**

💚**So, I know you wanted the reunion between Christian and Raymond to be emotional and all, but we are talking about two men who spend their lives keeping their feelings to themselves .. so that bro hug was the best we were going to get. No tears, no stutter, and no gasp. Sorry, but I don't see Raymond or Christian do any of that for each other, it's not how I wrote them. Remember that when Magnus shared his most intimate and painful memories with Christian , Christian was stone cold, when Magnus is his best friend, so, yeah, that's how they are.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

**💚What did you think of the reunion between Raymond and Christian ?**

**💚What do you think Raymond's birthday present will be?**

**💚 What did you think about Gail? She won't be an important character, but I am curious about what you think of her.**

**💚What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

* * *

‼️**FOR REVIEWERS**‼️

_I am so sorry,I know I said I would answer, but I need to stop updating at godforsaken hours_

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	40. Chapter 39: Vegas

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 39****: Vegas (7,0K) **

💚**So, fanfic has decided to deny me my obsession with broccoli and refuses to put the emoji, while every other emoji is fine! I call racism! This is blatant racism against broccoli!**

💚**Anyway, do you guys realise that we are over 340 reviews! OMG thank you so much! You keep making my day when you review, you have no idea how much!**

💚**And I know you all want Ray's pov and for him to know, but Christian and Ana need to sort out things between them first. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

After his breakfast with the Steele, Christian went back to his place, happily greeted by Bastille. The cat kept on brushing against his leg while he was preparing his bag, and though it slowed Christian in his preparation, he was far from complaining. He even smiled at the ball of hair when he mewled, demanding caresses when brushing against the leg did not give him any.

When he had come back before dawn to check his mails and take a shower, Bastille was nowhere to be seen, but since the cat often roamed around the roof at night, Christian hadn't really thought anything of it. Now that he was home in the broad daylight, the cat was demanding attention that he did not have for almost three weeks. But Christian only gave him a minute, before leaving the apartment and going to see Mia.

Once in the lift on his way down, he sent a text to Jose, telling him that he would drop by his place in half an hour, or so. After knocking, he wondered if maybe he should have come to see her when the sun was still down since it was Friday and that she was probably at school.

But luckily for him, Mia opened the front door, her messenger bag slung across her shoulder and her keys in hands. She was obviously on her way out. For a second, she stared at Christian, her blue eyes never blinking before she slapped Christian across the face.

"Don't you ever do that again!"

"I think next time, I'll stay dead," Christian said leaning against the wall while Mia glared at him before she fondly smiled.

"I'm glad you're not dead. I didn't like the idea of no longer seeing you."

"It takes more than a bullet to kill me," He plastered, hoping to reassure. She rolled her eyes, locking her front door, and he added, "Thanks for taking care of Bastille, by the way."

"Well, first of all … I think your cat should be named Casper because I still haven't seen him. Second … Jose wanted to give him to your girlfriend, but apparently, she was in denial, so I got stuck cat sitting meanwhile. I guess she knew better than us."

Christian kept his surprise of Jose's gesture, but he couldn't help but smile about Ana's denial. He loved the faith she had in his word, and how sure he would be back, no matter what. Though a part of him told him to talk to her about it, because one day, the announcement could be real, no matter what he could have promised to her beforehand.

"Did you get to see her since you came back?" Mia asked as they walked to the elevator and she called for it.

"I did." Mia rose an eyebrow, before shaking her head when Christian remained tight-lipped about what transpired between him and his girlfriend.

"You know, one day I am eventually going to meet her, and I will tell her all about how you never wanted to speak about her."

Christian chuckled, entering the lift with his friend, and pressing the button for the ground floor as he said, "Then she'll know I never talked trash about her."

Mia rolled her eyes once again, but with a playful smile on her lips this time. Once the lift reached its destination, she stepped out of it and said her goodbyes, though she turned last minute and said as the door closed, "Make sure to see Jose. He was really shaken up by your death."

The door closed on Mia waving at him, and Christian went back to his top floor to take his bag and leave. What he was not expecting was to find his best friend on his couch, petting Bastille and looking at him the same way Gail did a few hours ago. As soon as he closed the door, the cat escaped Jose's gentle caresses and rushed to Christian who crouched to pick him before walking to sit next to his friend.

Jose finally blinked, shaking his head slightly as he whispered more to himself than to Christian, "You're probably the only person in the world who can defy the laws of Nature like that and come back from the dead."

"I did not come back from the dead. I just took a very _very_ close bullet. And if you ask me, I will not risk it again," Christian reasoned, a part of his mind trying to figure out how Jose got so fast at his place.

And then it hit him. Jose and Ethan Kavanagh had reconciled, and Jose had spent the night in the building. There was no other logical explanation. Jose was leaving too far from this building to be able to have come in the little time it took Christian to say hi to Mia.

A small silence grew between the two men, during which Christian gave Bastille what the pet had been asking ever since he came back. He watched his friend gaze into the void, and though he couldn't really explain the logic that his brain followed, he could suddenly see what those past weeks had been for Jose. It was more than losing a friend or keeping for him a secret as heavy as the gelato ship he was entertaining with Ana. It was the fact that he had been the one to ask Christian to go abroad. Christian had been planning to go to Macau before going to Peru anyway, but he never told anyone but Raymond. He rarely talked about his plans to anyone but Raymond, and now it seemed like a giant mistake.

"You know, even I were dead, it wouldn't have been your fault," He finally said, not wanting his best friend to feel guilt over something he had no implications with.

Jose darkly chuckled, shaking his head as he pointed out, "If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have gone there by yourself. You would have taken Ryan, or Luke, or even O'Neill."

"No. I was planning to make the back and forth trip by myself. It was just verifying some things and firing a guy. I don't need backup. It's almost official business when you come to think of it. You asking me to go to Moscow only changed my departure ticket plane. Macau was already in my plans. Didn't Raymond tell you so?"

"Yeah. He tried to. I didn't really listen," Jose mumbled, his eyes still lost into space.

"I should have told you about it. actually, now that I think of it, I should talk to you a bit more when it comes to those things."

"Yes, you should."

Christian smiled, putting the cat down and getting up to pour Jose and him a glass of water each. When he came back, he asked about something that had been on his mind, but he didn't want to talk to Raymond about,

"Was he still alive when you got your present?"

When he sent Andrew in a box, Christian knew that there were chances that Jose would only receive a corpse, but he also believed that the drugs he had sedated the pimp with could keep him alive long enough to survive the plane ride. He glanced sideways, and saw that small smile of relief as Jose told him, finally turning to look at him,

"He was. And I will never be able to thank you enough for what you did for me. Not just sending him, but .. the other part. Though, to be honest, I did not watch it. I overheard it lay while Ethan watched."

"That's … morbid." When he had made the video, Christian had figured that Jose would appreciate seeing the man who had destroyed his childhood being broken in all possible senses. never, he would have thought that Jose would use the video as a way to break the ice with Ethan. It wasn't much that Christian cared of how the young Kavanagh saw him, but more that it seemed a bit extreme from Jose who beforehand refused to even talk about it to his lover.

"I don't even know what took over me," The Hispanic man explained, "I was upset and grieving, and Ethan was asking questions. So I just gave him the CD. I mean, it was easier than talking."

Christian nodded, not sure he himself would have gone that road, but not emitting any sort of judgement of how his friend handled his life.

"Did you get to see Raymond?" Jose asked, changing the topic, apparently uncomfortable with lingering so much on his personal life.

"Yes. I'm leaving in half an hour to the airport. I'm meeting him there to go to Vegas."

"You know, he was really devastated when he learnt the news. I don't think I've seen him that … helpless."

"Probably because you haven't seen him after his wife's death," Christian dismissed, not really eager to talk about his relationship with Raymond. Jose seemed to understand as he asked about the other moment of the Steele family,

"Have you seen Ana? She was in pretty bad shape too."

"I thought she was in denial," Christian mused because he couldn't understand how Ana could be down if she had been so sure that he would be back. This didn't make any sense.

"So you've seen her, already," Jose deduced, and it was Christian's turn to look into space. For a moment, he hesitated on keeping for himself what only concerned he and Ana. But then, he knew he would feel better talking about it with someone who was not in their relationship.

So he leant backwards, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, before he told Jose, "You know, … for a moment I really thought I was going to die out there. And … all I could think about was her. She was literally my last thought, and she was the first person I thought of when I reopened my eyes …"

He placed his wrists on his forehead, trying to see clear, when he perfectly well resumed his situation, "I'm screwed."

"Why? Just tell her."

"I did. And when she saw me sitting next to her father at the breakfast table, she almost had a heart attack, before acting as usual. She doesn't want her father to find out, and, honestly, I don't want to fight her on that. It's not worth it. The risks of losing her are too high."

This was something he had been thinking over and over as Ana fought against sleep and exchanged small talks with him. He knew she liked their relationship just as it was, and he couldn't risk arguing with her on that. He could lose more than his job on that, he would lose Raymond's respect _and_ Ana. He feared that she would leave him if he forced her hand on coming out of the closet.

"Christian … If you love her, you should just put your foot down. Because your relationship can't go further than it is, otherwise," Jose reasoned, and Christian was grateful that for once, his friend did not try to talk him out of his couple. He had a sad smile, opening his eyes as reality dawned on him,

"I guess I am weak, after all." He was. When it came to Ana, he couldn't recall a single time when he didn't go her way. He put her needs, and her wants, ahead of his, and he gladly did it.

"You're just like her father. You know, saying no to Ana won't kill her. She's not made of sugar," Jose argued.

"Maybe. But like I said, I don't want to fight. I just want to enjoy being with her, especially when two weeks ago, I thought I'd never get to do it again."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

For the first part of the flight, Christian barely spoke with Raymond, going through his emails while listening with one ear his boss fill him in about who he wanted to replace the manager he had sent in Macau. He wanted to steal the girl out of her job because apparently she had strong work ethics and was handling her team with an iron fist. When Raymond gave him a flash drive to check her resume, Christian was done sorting his emails. He opened her file, and the first thing he noticed was that she would be better positioned in Macau.

"Why keep her here? The girl speaks three different kinds of Chinese?"

"I want to see how well she works when she works for me first. If all goes well, I will call back Jerry in a year, and transfer her to Macau then."

"Is she single?" Christian asked, making Raymond smirk at him, pointing the screen displaying the young woman in front of them. Christian rolled his eyes, not impressed by the woman's generous cleavage as he let his mentor know,

"Not my type. But she's thirty-three, and if she's with someone, it might be hard to uproot her next year. Especially if they start talking children."

"And here I thought death would have put some perspective in your life," Raymond said with a bleak tone. "Don't worry. She's a career-driven woman, children are not on her agenda right now."

Christian nodded, closing the screen as he understood that Raymond knew more on that woman than the resume was showing. He had no doubts that his boss had asked Luke to give her all the details of her life, so he could woo her into his casino as he wanted.

Christian closed his eyes and rested his head back, the fatigue from the last few weeks suddenly coming down on him. Though he had spent more than two weeks bedridden, with nothing to do but rest, his recovery did not give him the rest he needed. And he had barely slept ever since he got back on his feet. The previous night was a perfect example. He could have gone to his place and get some sleep, or even sleep a little with Ana, but he spent most of the night talking with her, forgoing his exhaustion for the simple pleasure of being with her.

"So? Did dying put your life in perspective?" Raymond asked with a nonchalant tone as if to make conversation. Christian did not open his eyes, mostly because he did not like how intense Raymond's gaze had become since he came back. He did not like the feel of those brown eyes scanning through his soul.

"Not really. I am not planning on changing jobs or moving to another country, don't worry."

He heard Raymond have a small chuckle before a guffaw came from a few seats down where Ana was with the Kavanagh kids. He willed his eyes to stay closed, repositioning himself a little bit more comfortable in his seat and wished that the flight would be over yet.

"By the way, I know this is the last thing you want to hear right now, but you need to make a will. I was at loss of what to do with your place and your investments."

This made Christian open his eyes because he just realised that this was something he would need to take care of, first thing back in New York. "I have a will. I just have to update it."

"You have a will?"

"In my nightstand. So next time, you will know where to look. I made the will when I gave you the last payment to buy the flat. So it is a bit outdated."

"Why? Nothing has really changed since then."

"Well, I have a cat, now. Someone needs to take him in if I die, and I don't think Mia is up for it," Christian explained. He saw the taunt that Raymond was about to say, but the older man stopped himself as his daughter passed by them and went to the bathroom. Both men watched her pass, and once she was out of sight, Raymond told Christian,

"You don't have to get her a present, you know. Ana is the kind of person to ask present to everyone she sees on her birthday. You'll see, she'll ask the stewardess for something before we get out of the plane."

Christian repressed a smile, learning a new side of Ana. He knew that she was pretty enthusiast about her birthday and its celebration, but he didn't know that she liked presents that much.

"Well, it's too late for that. I already made arrangements."

Raymond frowned, giving Christian that look that made Christian feel so uncomfortable on the inside; and he asked, "What did you get her in a spare hour you got in the morning?"

"An hour with Eric Clapton after his show," Christian said as if nothing, shrugging a little for good measure. Raymond kept on looking at him, suspicion written all over his face, and though it wasn't the entire truth, Christian explained, "She mentioned it during breakfast, and I figured it would be better than dull chocolates."

"I would have preferred the chocolates," Raymond mumbled, more to himself than to Christian, reminding Christian of that little thing he witnessed about his boss's life that he had never seen before.

"Oh, yeah. Apparently, you're leaving with a diet Nazi," He chuckled, recalling the small banter he saw in the morning. It was funny how Ana was paying attention to what amount of sugar her father was eating when she herself ate much more than the healthy requirement. In all honesty, Christian had never seen Ana restrain herself from food because of health issues.

"Tell me about it! She gave Gail this lists of forbidden foods and forbidden meals. The only time I can have some eggs and bacon for breakfast is when I'm away. I curse the day that blasted doctor called home and she picked up."

"Well, when you'll live long enough to meet your grandchildren, and not speak to them through a breathing machine, you'll thank me," Ana's voice snapped from behind them.

The two men turned their head to her, and saw her glaring at her father before sitting in front of them, shaking her head, "Tsk, tsk, tsk. It's not good to talk ill behind a person's back."

"Nobody is speaking ill. I was just explaining to Christian the joy of fatherhood."

Ana snorted in a very unladylike fashion that made her father laugh at her while Christian looked through the window to give them a pretence of privacy. "We're staying at your casino, right?" Ana asked her father.

"Well, I don't see the point of having a place, if I'm not going to use it when I'm in town."

"Great. Can I get the Royale Suite? The one with the view?"

"I don't see why not," Raymond told her.

She brightly smiled, with one of those smiles that Christian loved so much, and was about to get up when her father stopped her. "While I have you here and alone, I do have some grand rules I'd like to set."

"Dad, I'm not a kid anymore. it's the whole point of us going to Vegas, actually."

Christian repressed a smile, seeing that he was not the only one to suffer from her smart mouth; but her father seemed unimpressed.

"Humour me. We're about to spend a weekend in Sin-City, and I just want to set some things straight. No alcohol coma." She rolled her eyes, shaking her head a little. "No gambling your life away."

"I don't even know how to play any card game."

"And no getting married in front of Elvis," Raymond warned, and though the first two requests seemed light in Christian's ear, he was sure that _this_ was the one Raymond was afraid might come true. He could hear in his boss's voice how this probability was worrying the man.

"So? Does that mean that I can get hitched in a non-Elvis chapel?" Ana joked, not realising how serious her father was. He rose her eyebrow at her, making her shake her head with a gentle smile as she got up and kissed his cheek, saying,

"I'm kidding, Dad! Gee, do you really think I would do that to you?"

And on those words she went back to her friends, laughing with innocence while Christian kept his eyes on Raymond. Ana might think that her father was joking around, but Christian could clearly see that this whole express Vegas marriage was something stressing the man out. To be honest, Christian felt that if Ana had staid for an answer, Raymond would have clearly told her that yes, he thought she would get 'hitched in front of Elvis'.

"And then she wonders why my blood pressure is high," Raymond said with a small shake of his head.

"In all honesty, I don't think that a girl who spends half a day looking for the perfect liquor for her father would get married without her father walking her down the aisle," Christian assured Raymond, keeping for himself that Ana also seemed like the kind of girl who wanted the big Cinderella wedding.

"Maybe … But there are many things I thought she would never do, and still ended up doing them. She's growing up, whether I like it or not."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

After they landed in Sin-City, Christian let the Steele and the Kavanagh celebrate Ana's birthday and went to the casino where Julia Fernandez, the manager Raymond had his eyes on, was working. He wasn't much checking on her but more tasting the waters, and after touring through the casino for a couple of hours, he went to a poker room and sat at the table to play.

Christian wasn't much of a gambler, but he still liked to play poker. It wasn't for the game in itself, or even to practice his poker face, but more to practice reading in people trying to conceal things from him, and the more he could read into their game, the more it was building into his confidence in how well he could spot a liar and read a person.

As he played, he let his mind wander to the suggestion that Raymond gave him concerning Ping and how he could thank him for saving his life, and now he was trying to find himself some time to go back to China during the next month, so he could propose to pay for the education of Ping's children, whatever they might want to do in life.

After a couple of hours of playing, Christian started considering leaving the table, rather disappointed in his opponents, but the game suddenly became more interesting as Raymond came into the room, alongside Ethan Kavanagh. Christian stayed on his seat, interested again in the game.

Strictly talking about cards, he knew he was better than Raymond, whether it was luck or strategy, he didn't know. But Raymond was one of the rare people he couldn't completely read. And though he often bluffed his way out of a game with his boss, he still liked the challenge to play with him.

After a few hands, he also discovered that Ethan was not bad and that his poker face was more developed than the ones of his previous adversaries. It was far from being as good as Raymond's, but it made Christian doubt a couple of times.

They talked about various things throughout the game, and after an hour of playing, Ethan smiled to himself, and muttered loud enough for the whole table to hear,

"Isn't it ironic to play cards in Vegas, knowing that we're going to church in the morning."

Christian slightly rose his eyebrow, looking from Ethan to Raymond, and the latter explained to him, "Ana decided to wait for us to be in Sin-City to drag us to church for the mess. The logic of that girl will always amaze me."

There were a few small laughs around the table, but Christian contented himself on genuinely smiling, the image of Raymond praying in a church stuck in his mind depicting something rather ironic. Raymond slightly glared in his direction,

"It's not funny."

"_You_ in church? I beg to differ," Christian retorted, his mocking smile never leaving his lips.

For as long as he had known Raymond, he had never seen the man as a religious person. If anything, Raymond and he were very much alike in the religious department, believing only on themselves. But he also knew that Ana believed in the higher power. And though he found it odd that Ana would go to mess while in Vegas, he was still more surprised by Raymond going, than by her going.

The game kept on going on for another hour, small talks still filling the room as people came and left the table. And just when Christian was about to call it a night, Ana wandered into the room and went to sit between her father and Christian, grading a light chair to occupy the empty space.

She watched them play as Ethan wondered about his sister and her whereabouts. "She's _so_ married! Instead of going to see showgirls with me, she said that she was going to Skype Elliott and hop to bed. How boring! So I was hoping that one of you would accompany me," Ana complained with a sigh, making the men around the table laugh.

In her naivety, she frowned, not understanding why people were making fun of her, and so Raymond explained, "Shouldn't _we_ be the one trying to drag you to watch showgirls and not the other way around?"

She shrugged, not really caring and apparently more interested in the game now than in seeing half-naked girls. "Will you teach me? So I would have a skill other than my good charms and manners to fall back on?"

Raymond had a small smile, checking the cards that had been dealt to him, before he let his daughter now, "If you want to become a shark at this game, I think you have better chances with Christian teaching you. He is reaping me off."

"How can he be better than you?"

"Because he knows how to bluff better than me," Raymond simply said, adding a few chips in the middle of the table.

Ana snapped her head to Christian, though he noticed that she did not look at him in the eye. She barely did when her father was around. "I thought you were an honest man!"

This ought to make the whole table frankly laugh at her, even the dealer allowing himself a condescending smile toward the redhead. Though he did not personally his opponents, Christian knew that they were business moguls, and he was sure that at least one of them was very much aware of Raymond's and his sides activities. Ana stared at Christian for a couple of seconds, before looking down on her knees, slightly blushing and feeling like she just said something stupid.

"No businessman is an honest man, Ana," Ethan explained. "If you want to thrive in business, you need to know how to lie. That's how you convince people to invest in you."

Ana seemed shocked, her eyes going around the table as she exclaimed, "So you're all liars!?"

"We're all excellent poker players," Raymond rectified, eyeing one of his adversary who was about to protest for his 'honour'. The man silenced himself, and the game kept on going for a few hands before Christian called it a night.

He left and went back to Raymond's own casino, heading straight to his room where he knew he would have a dreamless sleep. Once there, he took a shower and then checked his phone where he had two texts messages. One from Mia, and another from Ana.

**Really, I am starting to think that this whole cat thing is a ploy to make me go all the way up to your place and admire the view from up there. Because the cat is never around! Tell him I won't eat him, I'm vegan! Mia **

**Can I come? Ana **

Christian smiled to himself, answering Ana first, and then playing with a stereotype with Mia.

**Of course, you can always come. Room 14120. Christian **

**Well, are you sure you don't have some Asian ascendants? Maybe he can sense that, and does not feel safe around you. Christian **

Ten minutes after he sent the text to Ana, she was knocking on his door, wearing a blue nightgown. Christian kissed her right away before leading her inside and putting on a shirt. He had noticed the way she had looked at his wound and simply wanted to make her stop thinking about it.

"I just wanted to sleep in your arms," She said, climbing into his bed and getting under the covers. Christian joined her taking her in his arms as he pointed out,

"Then maybe the smart choice would have been for me to come to your room. Since I wake up before you."

"No, it's okay. I have to get up early tomorrow morning," She said, snuggling against Christian's chest.

"Oh yes, I've heard." She looked up, her eyes soft and curious before she seemed to understand that he already knew about her plans for the morning.

"Maybe you could come with us."

"To do what?" He chortled, having, even more difficulties picturing himself in a church, than picturing his boss.

"I don't know. Pray. Thank God for being alive."

This tore a pure and genuine laugh out of Christian that surprised him. Then, he shook his head and kissed his girl's forehead as he told her,

"God has nothing to do with me being alive. I am only alive because of a man Chinese named Ping."

Ana sat up a little, looking at Christian with her brows furrowed as she asked, "You took a bullet to the chest, you're not even contemplating the idea that maybe God —"

"Did what? Put me on Ping's path? Magically curved the bullet so it didn't touch my heart? Why was I on the bullet's path in the first place, then?"

"I don't know. All I know is that tomorrow, I am going to church, and I will light a candle for you," She snapped, brusquely laying back and throwing the covers over her head.

Christian sighed, feeling bad for having laughed at her. He himself wasn't a religious man, but he knew that it wasn't Ana's case, and aftermath, he felt like he could have been a bit more considerate in his words.

"Babe, don't be mad. It's just not me. You can light your candle, it won't change how I view the world."

Ana pushed the covers off her face, her lips hesitating between pouting and smiling. "I can't be mad when you call me babe."

He smiled, kissing her lips as he scouted her closer to him, making her giggle. For a moment, they did nothing but gaze into each other's eyes, when Ana suddenly frowned and asked with obfuscation,

"How come you're so good at lying?!"

"As Ethan told you, it's in my job description."

"Did you ever lie to me?"

"I've eluded the truth at times, but I've always been honest with you."

She thought a bit about this answer, before asking with candour, "Would you ever lie to me?"

"No," He immediately answered, the very idea prosperous in his mind. Still, he emitted some reserve, "But I am not above eluding the truth."

"Well, you're the master of that, so I'm not worried here," She bitterly said, making Christian reach for her cheek and caress it with love.

"What would you like to know?"

"Uh? I don't know. I don't have a list unscripted in my brain." Christian smiled, waiting for her to come up with a question, but he wished he hadn't when she finally had a topic in mind, "Tell me about your parents."

"I already told you. They left me when I was five, end of story."

She shook her head, and insisted, "I mean before they left. How were they? And didn't you ever try to look for them? What if they died in a car accident, that would explain why they left you?"

"They didn't die because otherwise, the social worker would have told me so. I would have been listed as an orphan, not as a ward. They left me, Ana. It doesn't matter how they were before, it doesn't matter how they are now, the situation remains the same, they left a five years old kid fend for himself."

"Sorry," She whispered, kissing his cheek, and Christian simply shrugged it off,

"It's in the past. I don't really care to even think about then. It's more interesting to think about now, especially when you're nearby." She smiled, her cheeks slightly reddening with pleasure. "Anyway, what did you get for your birthday?" He asked her, to lead her astray from the topic, but also because he just recalled that he had something for her.

Ana brightly smiled, sitting up straight as she said as if she was presenting an exposé,

"Well, after you left this morning, Jake dropped by and gave me a collection of scented candles from a brand that I love. Which was perfect because I was running low with a few of my favourite scents. Aunt Elena and Uncle Eamon got me tickets for the Fashion Week in September. Front row seat. I'm going with Kate, it's going to be awesome.

You got me the bracelet and the Eric Clapton meeting. By The Way, thank you so much! It was so lovely seeing him! He is such a nice man. I think that without Kate, I would have made a fool out of myself and fangirled more than talked with him. Haha

Ethan got me those scuba diving lessons, which is so cool. Every year, we do something like that together, since Kate is a chicken who likes to have both of her feet on the ground at all time. But it's okay because she gave me an album photo of our twenty-one years together. I'll show it to you when we will get back. You'll get to see my cute face when I was little, with big cheeks and missing teeth.

Mia said she got me something, but I will have to wait to be back to see what it is. Elliott got me this super fancy chessboard, so I can kick his ass with class. You know, it's actually how Elliott and I met, playing chess at school. We really were nerds. And Dad … Dad was weird. He got me a car."

"A car?" Christian mused, surprised that Raymond gave his daughter the means to drive around by herself, but also by the simplicity of the gesture. No matter the brand of the car, it seemed out of Raymond's character to give his daughter such an impersonal gift.

"Yup. He even said that I could drive it around all by myself." Christian smiled at her enthusiasm, a part of him sure that Raymond had hired someone to follow his daughter around. It seemed uncharacteristic of the man to simply let his daughter wander off in the wild. Suddenly, she frowned, "Though, he said it wasn't what he intended. now, I wonder what he wanted to give me in the first place."

Neither of them had time to think about it because someone knocked on Christian's door. He watched Ana freeze with fear, before she hid under the covers, probably thinking it was her father. Christian, on the other hand, was more relaxed. Even if it was Raymond, he didn't really care. He cared that Ana was found in his bed, but not really that their relationship was discovered.

Still, he took his gun and placed it in his back, not knowing who might be behind the closed door. He didn't try to hide his surprise to find Ethan on the other side, still dressed in his day clothes. He seemed a bit dishevelled, making Christian sure that the young man had had a few drinks.

He rose an eyebrow, not sure what the Kavanagh could want with him, keeping the door almost closed so nobody could see what was happening inside. He watched as Ethan closed his eyes and took a long inspiration before he said,

"I'll be brief. I wanted to thank you. You know, for what you did for Jose."

Christian kept his face unreadable, though he doubted that this was the reason Ethan came to him. still, he let him know, "Don't mention it. Jose is my friend, and it was only natural."

Ethan made a face that showed that he didn't think that whatever he saw in the video was natural, or even normal for that matter. He took another deep breath, and told Christian, "I'd like to ask you a question."

The seriousness of his tone made Christian step out of the room and close it properly so they could have some privacy, which didn't go unnoticed by Ethan. He glanced at the closed door, and asked with embarrassment, "Oh … you were entertaining?"

"Your question?" Christian questioned, unfazed.

"Well … it's just something Jose said. But I can't ask him, because that would put him in an awkward position. I can't ask my Mom, because .. well, she's my Mom. And you are … not really involved in my life, so I —"

"I'm not the one you should ask," Christian cut him off, understanding Ethan's trail of thoughts and not wanting to get in the middle of what he considered to be a personal issue. He could understand why Ethan didn't want to ask his mother about doubts that sprouted in his mind, but he also respected Elena's past and that she should be the one to talk about it.

"I get why you don't want to ask either of them, but I am not the solution. You have other options. You have your father, you have Raymond. It is not my place to tell you what happened or did not happen in your parents' life."

Ethan grimaced, clearly not happy with the turn of events. "I had a feeling you would turn me to Raymond."

"Which means you knew from the start the right thing to do."

The young man nodded, and waved his goodbye, walking back to his room. Christian did the same, climbing back into bed next to Ana and kissing her, after having put his gun down the nightstand.

"Was that a stripper coming to spice up your night?" She playfully asked. Christian wrapped his arms around her and told her, wiggling his eyebrows,

"Yeah. Maybe I should have asked her in so we could have a threesome…"

Ana mimicked him, sticking her tongue out. He shook his head at her, poking her nose, before bluntly getting up and walking to his trousers so he could retrieve the small box there. Then he walked back to his girl, and he gave her the box.

"Yay! Another present! I am so blessed!" She opened it, revealing a charm in the form of a small plane.

"I couldn't find anything that screamed Vegas, so I got that one instead."

Ana smiled, delicately putting the box on her nightstand before launching at Christian and kissing him. He had noticed that she was not wearing the bracelet, but given the fact that she had come to sleep with him, he didn't really mind. Especially knowing that ever since Christmas, there hadn't been a day since he had seen Ana without the necklace he gave her. He could only hope it would be the same with the bracelet.

When she broke their kiss, she traced the line of his torso over his shirt and said, "You know, I've been thinking about last night, and …"

"If you want a rerun, you don't have to be shy about it." Though this was mostly bragging, because he was exhausted, and longed to go to sleep.

"No. You seem pretty tired. I don't want your monster cock to be sick. I was thinking that … maybe I should go to the doctor and get a prescription."

Christian stared at her, not understanding where this conversation was leading, and so Ana sigh and explained, "I liked … feeling _all of you_, last night. And I certainly wouldn't mind if this happened again."

Christian kept looking at her, even though his mind finally understood what she was talking about. He wasn't going to lie, feeling her without the latex protection had been a very pleasant experience.

"You don't seem very excited about this," She sadly said, making Christian snap out of his thoughts in a shake of his head,

"It's your body, Ana. I don't have any say in this. You're the only one who has a veto on what to do with your body," He told her, not wanting to influence her in any way. Sure he would love to be intimate with her without anything between them, but that implied that she would have to make a change in her life. Whether it was pills or IUD, it was something meant to play with her hormones, and he felt that the decision should only fall on her shoulders.

"I know that, but …" She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply before looking at Christian with a bright smile, determination gleaming in her blue orbs, "You know what, I'm taking the appointment, and I'm getting birth control anyway. so, are you going to stop using condoms?"

"Let me know when you start," He said, wiggling his eyebrows.

She smiled at him, before resting her face on his chest, and they both fell asleep with this feeling of happiness surrounding hem.

_._

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What did you think of Raymond's demands?**

💚**What did you think of the last conversation between our couple?**

💚**What did you think of the conversation between Christian and Ethan?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	41. Chapter 40: Reminiscence

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 40****: Reminiscence (2,5K)**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**💚Just a few fair warnings. I will not be answering reviews from this moment onwards. It takes too much of my times (1h and sometimes 1h30) and it's time I should spend writing. But please, don't stop this from making you review. As you saw by the three updates in a week, reviews are fuel ...**

**Also, I just want to tell you guys that this story is a Christian mostly point-of-view. So we won't get Ana's point-of-view anymore. And actually, Kate and Elena are also out of the way … Yeah, I am mean like that, it's okay, I know you still like me **😉

**And I have to tell you guys that I feel you guys are putting a lot of importance into Raymond's knowledge of the situation. Not saying that it isn't important, but CG and AS relationship is still not really determined or developed. There is no point unveiling it if it is not strong yet ...**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

When Christian came home, midnight had already struck since a while. Bastille was nowhere to be seen, but it didn't worry Christian. He knew that the cat liked to go out and about on the roof, probably pretending to be the master of the universe. For a while, he sat on his couch, trying to think of nothing of his day and to empty his mind. This was a ritual he had come to do when he got home, following Mia's advice on 'decluttering his mind of the outside world'

She had started yoga exercises a month ago and was preaching the method to everyone she encountered. And Christian had to admit that putting his spirit at ease once he crossed the threshold of his home had a calming effect on him. He didn't go as far as trying the lotus position (and he wasn't planning to), but this small meditation gave him a clear mind for the next day.

After ten minutes or so, Christian went upstairs and took a shower, trying to figure out what he could do for the next couple of days. Every year, on the same date, Raymond gave him those two days off, and Christian never knew what to do with his time. He thought that he should have planned this better, so he could have gone to Macau to see Ping, but he already did that two weeks ago, three weeks after Ana's birthday. And now he had two free days, with no idea how to spend them.

He knew very well why Raymond systematically took those two particular days, so he should have been more prepared, but this year, he kind of let himself live through the motions instead of always being in control when it came to his personal life. Ever since he came back from the dead, as Jose would put it, Christian had tried to enjoy to the most his moments with Ana, whether they were planned or improvised. And ever since Ana got on the pill, she paid him a lot of improvised visits that left the both of them breathless.

As he walked into his room, thinking of reading a book before sleeping, he found the brunette and his cat sleeping in his bed, while a movie was playing on her laptop. He smiled to himself, despite his surprise of finding Ana there on that particular night, and he silently slipped next to her. Bastille lazily woke up, blinking in Christian's direction before yawning and leaving the bed to live his merry life.

He was about to switch off the movie when it caught his interest, so he put it back at the beginning, curious of what _The Shawshank Redemption_ could be about. Bastille came back as Morgan Freeman showed his skill as a prison fence, jumping with dexterity on Christian's laps and demanding his due petting that Christian mindlessly gave while watching the movie.

It was when Andy was getting beaten up by the prison guards for putting music on, that Christian's interested shifted from the movie to Ana. She stirred a little in her sleep, moaning something that sounded a lot like 'Oh God' and that made Christian grin like a child.

Bastille left, outraged that his massage seance had been interrupted, and though his eyes were on the screen, Christian's focus was on his girl having a wet dream. He had half a mind to wake her and make her dream reality, but he didn't go through with it, sure that would she be awake, she wouldn't have her mind to sex.

Suddenly, she woke up with a jolt, all hot and bothered and Christian paused the movie, smirking at her. She smiled, her brain still assimilating that she just woke up, and she said with a groggy voice,

"You're home." He smiled, loving to hear her say that word. He knew that they weren't living together, and that, given Ana's strong determination to keep her father away, that was bound to never happen, but he still liked to hear her say home when she talked about his place.

She rubbed her eyes, obviously trying to chase the sleep away, and she confessed, "I was dreaming about you."

"I heard," He replied with presumption. After all, it wasn't because she was having a sex dream that it meant that he was starring in that said-dream. Dreams weren't something that could be controlled.

She blushed, looking down slightly before she took in a deep breath and looked at the screen, blatantly changing the topic, "So you're waiting for me to be asleep to watch my movies. I am going to pretend all the time, now."

"It seemed interesting," He said, surprised that Ana, who never lost an occasion to joke about sex, was getting shy all of the sudden because she had a wet dream.

"It is. It is one of my favourite Stephen King with _Misery_. So? What do you think? Do you think he killed his wife?"

"There are some pros and some cons … But I don't think this is what the story is about."

"You shall see," She mysteriously said, picking Christian's interest for that movie even more.

She smiled at him, slouching so she could be closer to him and rest her face on his chest, and he told her, "I didn't expect you to be here."

She shrugged, clearly not willing to go down the path that Christian was tracing for her, and she asked, "Do you have anything planned for tomorrow?"

He looked down, waiting for her to talk on her own, and so she did, not looking up, "I … would like to spend the day with you. Just the two of us."

This made Christian frown because though he wouldn't mind, he felt that Ana should spend the next day with her father. "Isn't tomorrow your —"

"I don't want to be alone. Dad is travelling. Kate and Jake are both busy with their travelling plans. Ethan is out of town. I just … don't want to be alone."

Christian longly stared at her chestnut hair, hesitating on confronting her on the issue, before he kissed her hair, and promised her, "You won't." She squeezed her arms around his torso, and he let her know, "In fact, I was planning on going someplace tomorrow. We could do that together, instead of staying here."

She nodded, before putting the movie back on, all the while avoiding Christian's eyes. And they watched the end of the movie together, hugging one another.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

As Christian was reading the newspaper, Bastille kept on playing with the swinging corner on his left side, and he couldn't tell if he was annoyed or amused by the cat's antics. He was skimming through the sports section, his mind half set on investing in a team for his retirement plan, when Ana finally came downstairs, ready to go.

No matter how long they have been together, Christian couldn't understand how she could sometimes spend a whole hour under the shower. Just under the water, not even getting ready with all her incomprehensible products, just washing her body and hair.

The two of them took Christian's car, though Ana tried to convince him to take her brand new red Porsche, and they talked about mundane things while Christian drove them to the particular destination he had in mind. Ana was trying to plan their next travel, Peru still fresh on her mind. She wanted to do something as physical. She was hesitating between doing a safari in Kenya and climbing the Kilimanjaro.

Christian half listened, his mind more preoccupied on how he was going to get her to cooperate with his next move, than on a possible journey to Africa. But when he pulled over, Ana stopped talking all at once, and squinted her eyes in his direction,

"What are we doing here?" She accused, pointing the cemetery's gates. He looked at her, not sure if she was angry or sad, and told her,

"I think you know." She glared at him, scoffing and crossing her arms across her chest, and so he asked, "Did you ever come here on that particular day?"

She pursed her lips, before muttering, "To be honest, Mike used to take me here. For her birthday, on the day of the funeral, for All Saints Day. But after he left … I didn't see the point of coming here when I couldn't even remember her face."

There was a small moment of silence. Christian knew how much Ana was hurting to be shut down by her father concerning her mother. He knew that, though she would never admit it, a part of her holding it against Christian to have killed Lincoln, the only person who still talked about her mother to her, because by doing so, he took away a part of her mother. And the thing was, he didn't know how to deal with her pain. He saw how her eyes sometimes got sad when she saw Elena and Katerine together, he heard the longing in her voice when she was preparing her best friend's wedding with Mrs Kavanagh, he felt her pain in Japan when she tried to recapture a part of her mother's childhood.

But he could do nothing about it. Because it wasn't his place to help her with that pain.

"Ana …" He started, but she shook her head, and demanded,

"I want to leave, Christian. I don't want to stay here."

"Your father comes here every year," He blurted out. She looked at him with round eyes, and he explained, "Every year, your father comes here and spends the day with your mother. Every year he brings her flowers. Every year, no matter what happens at work, no matter where he is on the globe, your father takes time to pay a visit to your mother on that particular day."

"How would you know?"

"A couple of years after I started working for your father, I noticed this consistency in his schedule, I followed him. And the year after. That's how I knew that he _had_ a wife. I would never have known otherwise."

Ana stared at the entry of the cemetery, thinking and processing the fact that her father came here every year. She whispered, "He comes here every year, but he didn't even come to her funeral."

Christian watched her fight against her tears, and he gently put his hand over hers, "I'm sorry, Ana. But your father will never be the one who will make that step you desperately want him to make. If you want to mend that rip between you, you will have to do it yourself. You will have to walk to that gravestone, and talk to your father yourself because he's too hurt to do it himself."

"Why?! It's not fair! He's the one who remembers her! It's his job to talk about her!" She exclaimed, self-righteous, before wiping away with anger the few tears that escaped her eyes.

"Life isn't fair. Life is sometimes about being the bigger person and going toward the one who is in pain, no matter how much we are in pain ourselves. Helping others is sometimes how we heal ourselves. I know you would give anything to remember your Mom, but try to put yourself in your father's shoes. _He_ has the memories. Sometimes memories are more painful than a blank space."

Ana sniffled, still looking at the entrance, and Christian knew that she was fighting between her wounded ego, and her desire to know more about her mother. After all, Raymond had shut her down for more than fifteen years, and no matter how forgiving Ana could be, she was still only human.

"I'm not trying to justify your father's actions, Ana. I'm trying to give you the tools to get what you want the most in life. You just have to make the first step. For both your sakes."

"But … what do I tell him? He's not expecting to see me?" She asked with a small voice, her leg shaking with nerves.

"You tell him the truth. You tell him that you wanted to pay a visit to your mother because we both know that deep down, you wanted it."

"And what if he sends me away?" She insisted, turning her head to Christian and showing how scared she was at that possibility. He gently smiled to her, and assured her,

"He wouldn't dare do that to the memory of your mother. Not on her grave, not on the anniversary of her death."

If there was one thing he was sure of, it was that. Raymond was a loyal man, and though he did not know him at that period of time, he could only guess that he had been a loyal man to his wife as well. He doubted that Raymond would dare insult the memory of the wife he still loved on her tombstone by refusing to talk to their daughter.

Ana gave him a sad smile, though her eyes were still teary, and Christian gave her a pack of tissues before leaning over and opening the passenger door. She took a deep breath and pecked his lips before leaving the car and walking inside the cemetery. And as she did so, Christian couldn't help but think of the consequences this little gesture could have on him if Raymond were to find out that he was the one who got Ana there in the first place. But as he drove away, he realised that … he didn't care, as long as it gave the two Steele some peace of mind.

.

_._

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**💚 I know you guys wanted a longer chapter, but it is an emotional one, and I can't stretch it out, or cut it somewhere else ...**

**💚And as I said, though it seems to drag, Raymond is not the issue at the moment. try to understand why Ana doesn't want him to know ... And the, read between the lines of what Christian has been saying for chapters ... It's all cryptic, but you'll understand, haha.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**What did you think of Christian's gesture for both Ana and Raymond?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	42. Chapter 41: Complications

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 42****: Complications (4,0K)**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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**Christian's PoV **

Two days after Raymond's annual couple of days off, Christian and he were in his office, talking about some activities in Italy that were becoming troublesome. The activity in itself wasn't that bothering to Idris, after all, Raymond had contemplated doing some wind energy himself, before abandoning the idea for a lack of trusty people abroad. But the Mazarati were starting to gain too much money for Raymond's taste, and therefore they started to get cocky and try to mix with businesses where Idris already had full control over.

Raymond wanted to settle this thing in a diplomatic fashion, while Christian was rather leaning toward a brutal and frontal blow. Something curt and decisive that would make Luca Mazarati think twice before trying to steal business from them. still, by the end of their conversation, Christian had agreed to bite his bone and to try Raymond's way who preached that direct violence wasn't always the way.

A part of Christian thought it was rich coming from a man who killed his own son without even trying to get him help, but he could also see that if he wanted to entertain a somewhat business relationship with the Italian family, he would need to indeed, sometimes go for the diplomatic option. Moreover, he was due to go to Japan within the next week to settle some business with the head of the Yakuza, and he couldn't possibly be in Italy and in Japan at the same time. Japan being the more pressing matter, he would have to forgo his first instincts and simply let this one go.

As the conversation slowly drifted to their investments in South American most notorious products, Raymond received a text that he was clearly not expecting. Christian saw disappointment on his boss's face before he was proposed,

"How about you join me for dinner? I've been ditched for the third night in a row, and Gail probably already cooked for two."

Though he did not show a single emotion, Christian was still surprised by this piece of news. Ana had not come to see him since he left her to the cemetery five days ago, and he knew that she was reluctant to interrupt her best friend's post-wedding bliss.

He was tempted to refuse Raymond's offer, a part of him hoping that Ana would surprise him back home, but decided against it. He still had some things to see with his boos concerning his upcoming trip to Japan, as well as some things he wanted to change about the way their Columbian products were imported, and Christian had never been one to procrastinate.

So with a simple nod, he followed Raymond to his kitchen, still discreetly checking his phone when the older man wasn't looking. Once seated, Gail served them some stuffed squash, with a little bit of lettuce on the side. She opened a bottle of white wine and disappeared before Christian could even say a word.

He watched the door through which the young maid had vanished, his brain slightly analysing how the blonde had been acting around him ever since he came back from Macau, and with a small smile, he told his boss, "I think your maid isn't really fond of me."

"To be honest, no one is really fond of you, Christian. You scare people," Raymond said the most naturally in the world, serving himself a generous glass of wine before typing something on his phone and digging in his food.

"Because you don't?" Christian snorted. Raymond spared him a compliant smile.

"Well, it is in the job description, isn't it? What kind of businesses would I be running if I didn't scare people a bit? But I lost all my credibility with Gail when she saw me with her kids."

Christian nodded, not commenting that he thought that children were Raymond's weakness. A part of him had always wondered why Raymond had such a huge place when it was only his daughter and him. And the more he was hearing Ana talk about her father and how he treated her, her late-brother and his Godchildren, the more Christian was convinced that Raymond had had the hope to have a numerous family before his wife died.

And Christian had already seen glimpses of Gail's twins every now and then. They were both well mannered and downright adorable, that he had no doubts that Raymond's scary facade completely cracked whenever he was around the two kids.

Raymond's phone buzzed, making him purse his lips slightly, which Christian had learnt over the years was a sign of his irritation.

"I truly wish that when you will have kids, you will be blessed with only boys. They are less worry and less maintenance," He said with a sigh, and though Christian knew his boss was talking about the woman they both loved in different ways, he did not bounce on the matter.

Ever since Christian had started working closely with Raymond, he had had the habit of hearing his boss complain every now and then about his daughter. Even more so when she started to grow up and wanted things such as boyfriends and sleepovers that did not involve a member of the Kavanagh family.

"Does Luke report to you about her whereabouts in the city?" Raymond nonchalantly asked.

Though he was aware of the pact Raymond made with his daughter through Ana and the man himself, Christian knew very well that Raymond would never be able to let the control he had over the security of his daughter flaunter so easily. And there was the moment he had been expecting ever since Ana let him know the promise her father made. Everything was in the fine print. Raymond promised not to ask directly to the person that would be following her, and he wasn't. He was using Christian as a buffer.

And would he have not been in a relationship with the girl, Christian wouldn't have minded. After all, this arrangement was giving peace of mind to the two Steele, giving the two of them the impression that each had the control over what they felt was important. Raymond, his daughter's security, and Ana, her freedom.

Christian was no fool, and though Ana never mentioned it, he was absolutely sure that she and Luke had a deal of some sort where he wouldn't have to actually follow her everywhere and all the time. He was sure of that because any person tracking Ana properly would have come to Christian to ask him a few questions. For instance, why would she so regularly come to his building, when sometimes she would come when her best friend was gone. That definitely implied the presence of a secret boyfriend, and Christian knew that any man working for Raymond would come to see him first, before going to their boss to tell him that his precious daughter had a secret lover. After all, Raymond was not known for his diplomacy when it came to his daughter.

So after swallowing his fork of delicious squash, Christian looked straight in his boss's brown eyes, and told him, "You had an arrangement with your daughter, and I'd rather not come between you and your daughter."

Raymond made a small sound with his nose, resuming eating his food as he nonchalantly said, "Speaking of which, Ana came to visit her mother's grave a few days ago."

Christian rose an eyebrow as if asking where was the correlation in all of that, and Raymond explained, "It was something I did not expect. For fifteen years, it has always been me. Even Eric and Michael came on a different day. And Ana stopped going after Michael 'disappeared', no matter how much Eric tried to make her go with him.

So imagine my surprise when I saw my daughter stumbling her way through the gravestones, and telling me that she decided to pay a visit to her Mom. She looks so much like her mother, that at first, I thought it was a ghost."

"Is there a question somewhere?" Christian asked, his tone placid. He knew that if Raymond asked upfront if he had been the one to bring Ana to the cemetery, he would honestly answer him. But what he did not care for, was playing a game of cat and mouse where Raymond would have plenty of innuendoes, hoping to make him slip up.

Raymond briefly looked at Christian who kept his poker face on, waiting for his boss to ask the ultimate question. It was in moments like that that Christian felt that Raymond had a fairly good idea of what was happening between him and his daughter. It was in moments like that that Christian remembered that Raymond was a very powerful man who had the whole city of New York in his pocket, and who loved his daughter above everything else. But there was always one thing that didn't add up.

Raymond was not a patient man, nor a forgiving man. If he would to ever find out that Christian was seeing his daughter, he wouldn't patiently say nothing and pretend he was ignorant of the situation, all the while training Christian to replace him when the time would come. He would most likely confront Christian, before feeding him to the pigs for going after his daughter, _and _behind his back.

Raymond Steele wasn't a man that would simply let things be. He would take actions. Lethal actions. And nothing in his demeanour let Christian feel like he was about to die.

After a small moment during which the two men stared at one another, Raymond finally said, "No, I guess not. I was just surprised to see my daughter there. But in the end, it was worth it. Never prior to that day, I would have even imagined talking to Ana about her mother."

They kept on eating, discussing their various businesses that were to take place, and Christian passing on the desert as usual. Just as Raymond was pouring himself a second cup of coffee, Christian sipping on his usual herbal tea, Ana made an apparition, accompanied to Christian's greatest surprise by Jack Hyde.

The young man politely nodded his head toward both Raymond and Christian while Ana went to her father to kiss his cheek, and check on his desert.

"I see that as soon as I'm not here, you're having cake," she accused, pointing the remain of the piece of cake in front of her father.

"Carrot cake, my dear. It is still on your 'allowed-list' if I recall."

The young girl humphed, caught in her own web and not happy about it. She glanced briefly at Christian, not meeting his eyes, as usual when her father was around, and said, "Well, we'll leave you to whatever you were talking about, and I will find Gail to tell her that Jack and I will be having coffee in the library."

Christian watched his girlfriend leave the kitchen, Jack Hyde short on her heels, a new and powerful feeling rising within him. If he were to listen to his guts, he would have gotten up and quickly put a stop to whatever was going on. A thousand questions whirled in his mind, all with Ana and Jack as the main components. He wanted nothing more than to march to them and clearly state to Jack that he was not to mess with _his girlfriend_.

And this was exactly why he didn't do it. He was too surprised by this foreign feeling of possessiveness and anger that it grounded him, rending it impossible for him to move or say anything. He was not used to feeling so in lack of control of his feelings, and therefore himself.

When he finally took back control of his emotions, putting anything raw and new in a mental box to deal with it later, he sipped again on his tea, noticing just then that Raymond was still looking where his daughter had disappeared with her friend. And that's when something lit up in Christian. _Why didn't Raymond say anything about his cherished daughter bringing a man home_?

"I don't think it was a good idea taking Jack to replace his father," Raymond finally said, drinking from his coffee, his eyes still on the empty space his daughter used to occupy.

A week before going to Macau, Christian had convinced Raymond that working with Jack Hyde would be a good investment. And he was. He had brought the company a multi-million dollars deal that Mr Kavanagh had been trying to snatch for months. And so, Christian helped the young Hyde in return, giving him all the information about his father and his double life.

As Christian expected it, Jack did not hesitate to rat his father out to both his wives who were now both suing him for half his fortune each. If Christian could say anything about Jack from the few interactions he had with him, it was that the young man was ambitious, and did not care for his father. When he learnt about his father two-timing his mother, he was more worried about how he would break the news to his mother, than about how this could destroy his father's life.

If he were honest, Christian actually was starting to like the man for he seemed to be someone interesting, even outside of business. But now that he was seeing him outside of the Robinson Inc' building and businesses, he did not like what he so.

Still, that him being around Ana did not stop Jack to be a good businessman that would rather valuable to the company.

"He's good. He's actually better than his father," Christian said with a monotonous tone, though every fibre in him was screaming at him to agree with Raymond, and unleash the fury that was starting to show on his boss's face. He was sure that if he validated the older man's thoughts, Raymond would not hesitate on marching starlight to the library and drag Jack out of his house by the ear.

Raymond started drumming his fingers on the table, his eyes having never left the door. Then with a heavy sigh, he looked back at his dessert, disregarding it, before planting his eyes on Christian. "As I said, boys are less worry and less maintenance."

"But girls take better care of you in your golden days," Christian contoured, quoting an old adage that he heard Mrs Parvati say over and over again when she would brag about having only girls.

With those words, Christian got up, not wanting when Raymond's patience would wear thin and he would barge into whatever was happening in that library. Or that's what he told himself, avoiding to think that it was _his_ patience that was wearing thin and that it would be _him _barging in that library.

During his ride home, Christian did best to ignore the gnawing feeling that was growing inside of him and showing him a side of him he was not sure to like, but when he was finally home, his mood had done anything but improve. He tried to wash away his new emotions under the shower, but his mood was even more sullen once he was dried.

And this was why he decided to call Ana. Usually, it was the other way around, but usually, Christian would be working late, and Ana wouldn't be entertaining young men in her house. She answered at the third ring, her voice cheery and oblivious of the bundle of nerves that Christian was at that moment.

"Hey! What a nice surprise to have you call me."

"How was your night?" Christian asked without preamble, realising as he said those words how cold his one had been. Ana didn't seem to pick up, because she gushed,

"It was _wonderful_! Jack and I went to a new production of _Les Misérables_ and it was so good. I cried when Eponine died. No matter how many time I see that musical, Eponine always makes me cry."

And that's when Christian finally understood what was happening to him. _He was jealous_. It wasn't much that Ana had been with Jack (though he would like to have an explanation on that), but it was more that Jack had been able to take her out, in the open and that she thoroughly enjoyed it when she would always get upset when he would try to bring _their_ relationship to the open.

"So, Jack Hyde has the right to take you out on shows, whilst I can't?"

"Christian." He could almost picture her rolling her eyes. "You don't even like Broadway shows."

"Because you think that I wouldn't suck it up for you once in a while? Do you think so little of me?"

"No. I never said or implied that. It's just … well, you're working a lot, and I wanted to see that show, and Jack was in need to get out of his house for a while. I know he pretends he's fine with this thing going on with his Dad, but he's really affected by this whole mess. A few nights out did him some good."

"I don't mind that you're seeing him. I mind that you allow him things that you don't allow me," He snapped, realising that once assured that there was nothing going on but friendship and moral support, the only thing still eating him was what he just accused her of.

He heard her sigh. "I don't want to argue with you. Even less over the phone. But what you're saying doesn't make any sense. I allow things with you that I certainly don't allow other people to do. I'm not hearing you complain about that."

"It's not the same."

"And how so?"

"Because I don't like not being able to take _my girlfriend_ to a fucking show when the rest of the whole wide world get to do so!" He snapped, surprising himself first.

He did not expect to burst like that, and it was the first time in a long time that he lashed at someone based simply on raw emotions. And he did not like it one bit. He liked even less that it was Ana who had to suffer the blow, and that they were having this conversation over the phone.

"Well, if you don't like it, maybe it would be best if we stopped," She retorted with the same snappy tone, and those words had the effect of a cold bucket of ice on Christian. "I mean, this had been fun and all, but —"

"Do you want to quit on us?" He asked, his face livid while his insides had ceased to exist all of the sudden.

"No. But you're the one complaining about us, right now."

"I just want more us," He argued with a soft voice, calculating his tone and his words carefully, for he knew that one wrong word could mean the thing he dreaded the most.

"Well, that can be arranged. Us doesn't mean that we have to be out. I want us to be just us, is that wrong?"

Though Christian wasn't sure if Ana was aware of it, _he_ knew that she had played him masterfully. She had given him the impression of giving him what he wanted, but without really doing it. This was something her father was expertly skilled at. And whether it was from experiencing it, or witnessing it, Ana had picked that skill.

"No. Of course not," Was all he said, admitting to himself that, though Raymond was weak when it came to his daughter, he himself was no better.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Three weeks after his telephonic confrontation with Ana, Christian had to admit that one good thing came out of it, Ana came more often than once a week. In fact, he was the one missing out on their time together due to some business trips he could not postpone. But both times he came back from abroad, he found Ana waiting for him with a meal of her cooking (more or less good).

They never breached the topic of officialising their relationship again, and with the way things turned the last time, Christian had decided that as long as Ana would not decide by herself to take them out of the closet, he would not talk about it again. He would rather be her secret boyfriend, than her nothing.

A part of him wanted to talk to Mia about it, to have a feminine inside on Ana's brain, but he never did. Mostly because he knew what she would say about him being so compliant over something that was bothering him. It wasn't how healthy relationships bloomed. And it wasn't even healthy, to begin with. But no matter how weak it made him, he would rather have this tiny bit of a relationship with the redhead, than none at all. And honestly, it wasn't as if he were unhappy. On the contrary, he was very happy when he spent time with her, even more, when he made her see the stars.

And there was the issue of his feelings for Ana. He was very well aware that he was in love with her. And he had told her between lines how he felt about her, though he had always been careful not to say the three words to her. At first, he had convinced himself that he was just waiting for the right moment, but the more time they spent together, the more he actually wanted her to say it first. awake, aware and looking at him in the eye.

She was holding back the officialisation of their couple, he was holding back the next milestone of their relationship. It might be childish, borderline twisted, but he would not make that step as long as she would not make it first, or take the step she knew he wanted to take.

With a shake of his head, he came back to the present time, only to see with displeasure that Agent Taylor was walking in his direction. For a brief second, Christian had to admit that he was surprised to see Jason Taylor approach him in the open, just in front of Robinson Inc', but after thinking about it, he realised that it was the only safe place where the FBI agent was sure to find him.

Still, he was in no mood to entertain the agent's disillusion, "Whatever you have to tell me, I am not interested."

The man held up his hands with a friendly smile that did not fool Christian, and told the young criminal, "I realised the other day that I have been going on the wrong foot with you. I have been trying to turn you against a man that took you under his wing at a young age … almost a _father_ figure to you."

Christian ignored the taunt of the man, still walking away from the Robinson Building, without any purpose in mind. Like he said before, he was in no mood on that particular day. It was extremely hot, the Mazarati were still bugging his mind, and one of their shipment from Brazil had been 'lost' before reaching New York.

"I have been trying to diss your _father_ when I should have asked you, what would your _real parents_ think if they knew what their son had become? I don't think Grace and Carrick would appreciate hearing me tell them all about their son working for a criminal organisation …"

_._

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** Does Raymond know? I know this is the billion dollars question!**

**💚 How do you feel about this tiny conflict between our couple?**

**💚 How is Christian going to react to this last sentence?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	43. Chapter 42: The Past & The Future

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 42****: The Past & The Future(4,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️ **

**💚 So, just as a reminder for everyone, it has been said several times by several different characters that Ana is a spoilt child because her father never told her no. So of course, she won't change all of the sudden. Yes, she is spoilt, and act like it, but she doesn't even realise it. Also, try to remember what Kate told Christian on her wedding day …**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV **

Jose was seeing with Raymond their plans to extract a young girl from an insidious strip clubs that were forcing the girls to give dances that were a little too private. Jose had established contact with her a few months ago, and after many private sessions where he earned her trust, she was finally ready to leave that awful place that pretended to be a work institution.

Still, the girl, Lydia, didn't want to quit the scene altogether. She liked to dance and liked, even more, the attention she got from her moves. She just didn't like the side activities that were happening at the strip club. Jose had promised her an apartment (one on the same floor where Mia lived), as well as to help her find a job where she could do what she loved; and as he was letting Raymond know of Lydia's predilections, his boss proposed that she would dance in Katherine's club.

Usually, Jose would be working those details with Elena, but she and Eamon had gone to Bora-Bora to celebrate their wedding anniversary. After settling on everything that would be needed for the new girl, Jose gathered his stuff, hoping to catch Ethan by surprise in his apartment so they could have lunch together, but Raymond's serious voice stopped him while he was in the middle of getting up,

"I'd like to ask you something that could be qualified as personal, Jose."

Immediately, Jose thought of this secret he was holding for Christian and cursed the man. He knew that it had always been a matter of time before Raymond found out what was happening between his precious daughter, and his second in command. _Raymond Steele always knew everything_!

And maybe Christian could get away with murder in Raymond's eyes. Actually, he already did several times, Eric Lincoln just being one example amongst others. But Christian would _certainly_ not get away with fucking with Anastasia Steele. And even less for falling in love with her. Jose had seen how Raymond always went to Ana's past boyfriends when he estimated the relationships went for too long, and how he all made them break up with her. Though he never knew if it was because Raymond was afraid of being alone without his daughter, or if it was because he was judging that his daughter's suitors weren't good enough for her.

In both cases, Christian was screwed. If it was the first option, he was definitely stealing Ana form her father, making her love another man that wasn't him. If it was the second, no matter how much Raymond liked Christian, Jose doubted that the crime lord deemed another criminal worth his daughter. Ana was a snowflake, too pure for the world that Raymond had built around himself, and that was why he had always done his best to protect his daughter from it.

But still, no matter what, Jose knew that he wouldn't betray Christian. Even if Raymond asked a direct question, he was going to do his best to protect his best friend and his secret. He watched Raymond, waiting for him to drop the fateful question and realising suddenly that no matter what, his allegiance didn't go to the man who helped him out of a hellhole, but to the man he considered to be his brother.

"Feel free not to answer," Raymond quietly said, his face unreadable, and Jose nodded, sure that he would use that option.

"Does Christian know about your relationship with my Godson?"

This had the merit to literally shock Jose. Not much because Raymond revealed that he was aware of Ethan's and his relationship, but more because he had the stupidity of thinking that his own couple would get passed Raymond's radar. He had been going on and on at Christian for keeping his relationship a secret from Raymond when he had been doing the exact same thing. Still, he wondered for how long had Raymond known about him and Ethan.

"Christian is my best friend," He eluded, not wanting to give a direct answer that could put Christian in troubles. He didn't know if Raymond already had a conversation about this with Christian, but he knew that Christian would try to cover his tracks by being as evasive as possible. So he didn't want to say something that could be wrongly interpreted and contradict what Christian might have already said.

Still, a part of him felt weird talking about him and Ethan as a couple to Raymond before doing it to Ethan's parents. Ever since he came clean about his past and feelings to Ethan two months earlier, their relationship had bloomed. He had met the Kavanagh siblings as Ethan's official boyfriend, he practically lived with Ethan, and they were even talking about getting a dog together. But he was still to meet Elena and Eamon as their son's partner.

Strangely enough, it was Ethan who would always come up with excuses to not introduce them. Lately, it was more often than not work, but Jose couldn't really blame him, because he had been working more as well with that whole Lydia situation. If he were honest with himself, Jose wasn't that eager to meet Elena outside their professional relationship. Mostly because he was afraid that she would think that he was beneath her son.

After all, she was one of the only two people alive who knew everything there was to know about his sordid past, the other person is his shrink. Elena had been the first person he had opened up to. She was the one who brought him to a specialist and stayed with him in his early sessions because he wasn't comfortable staying alone with a man. She was the one who took him to the doctor when he grew concerned of having contracted an STD. she was the one who took over his education when Carla died, and who forced him to keep studying when maths and science became too hard for him. She knew him at his lowest, she knew how screwed up he had been, and she knew that he could be a stain in her son's pristine life.

"I know he is," Raymond said with a condescending tone before letting a small silence grow. then, he let Jose know, "Ethan came to see me a week ago, when his parents left for Bora-Bora, and he asked me something that I was not expecting from him."

Jose furrowed his brows, wondering what could actually surprise a man like Raymond. Raymond answered before he could even ask, "He asked about his mother…"

And finally, Jose understood why Ethan had been avoiding getting his parents in the same room as him. He must have made a connection between Mrs Kavanagh and him, and the assumptions that he made must not have been pretty ones. After all, who wanted to think of their mother in such a way? A mother is the purest image one could have. She was the one who had had your back since before you were born, the one who bared your tears, the one who nursed you back to health, the one who praised your smallest achievements. Who would ever want to have that image tarnished? Who would ever want to think that something that terrible could have happened to their mother in her past?

Jose stared at Raymond, not saying a word. "He also mentioned that he first went to Christian since Christian is an impartial party that would have 'no reason to lie to him'. And apparently, Christian redirected him to me. But Christian never disclosed that little conversation he had with my Godson, and that got me wondering as to why …"

"Christian is loyal to you," Jose simply said, not liking the fact that their boss was questioning Christian's loyalty to him when he was the most faithful person he had ever known. Even with that whole Ana situation, Jose knew that Christian never directly lied to Raymond, and more than once pushed Ana toward her father to mend their relationship.

Still, he played a card that he knew Raymond wouldn't be able to turn on him, "But _you_ better than anyone know that loyalty doesn't mean full disclosure."

"What do you mean?"

"You are loyal to your daughter," Jose said, his tone full of innuendos, and Raymond nodded, seeing his point.

Though Raymond never mentioned to Jose what happened to Mike, Jose also knew that he never even mentioned the boy to Ana after his 'disappearance'. He never lied to her straight to her face, but he always avoided the topic of her brother. It was Christian who came clean to Ana and told her that she was wishing for the return of a dead man, all the while keeping Raymond's secret from her.

"So, are you telling me that I should let slip a few white lies?" Raymond asked, his eyes hard on Jose as he waited for his answer. It was a look that Jose had come to learn and hate. Every time Raymond had looked at someone like that while saying something, he knew that the question was a test, and that passing it was crucial.

"I think you should follow your guts, without completely dismissing your reason."

Raymond nodded, and Jose took it as his cue to leave, determined to pay a visit to Christian before going to see Ethan. He got back up and put all his papers in his bag.

"Perhaps you should consider talking to Ethan. I don't think my edulcorated version of what happened to Elena in her youth was convincing enough. It seems to me that he wasn't satisfied with what he heard."

Jose didn't say a thing, a part of him understanding exactly how Ethan felt knowing that no matter what, this was something that Raymond would never be able to understand. No matter how much he loved and cared for Elena, she wasn't his mother. At best, she was his sister. Raymond couldn't understand how devastating it felt when something so tragic happened to your mother, especially when there was nothing you could do about it. Raymond got his opportunity to ket his anger out, and got his revenge, Jose had the same opportunity thanks to Christian, but Ethan would never be able to get that.

"I told Elena about my conversation with Ethan. And I'm telling you, now. I only mentioned with very light words what transpired with her uncle. Nothing more. I think that if Ethan wants to know more, it should be from Elena."

"This is not my story to share," Jose agreed, having never even considered telling Ethan about what Elena had told him concerning her past. "And I doubt Ethan would even think of asking me. That's why he went to Christian, and then to you."

Raymond nodded, then giving his attention to his computer, and Jose made his way out of his boss's office. But before opening the door, a question came to him, "How long have you know?"

"To be honest, not that long. It was shortly after Christian's 'death'."

This ought to surprise Jose. Raymond didn't know everything after all. It had been almost two years since Jose and he were together, and Raymond had only known for three months. There was hope yet for Christian and Ana.

"Did you tell Elena?" He couldn't help but ask.

"Like you said, this isn't my story to share."

"So is this why you asked me and not Christian? Because this isn't his story to share?"

Raymond seemed to think about it, before looking at Jose with that particular way he disliked so much, "Partly. You have to know that Christian is a much better liar than you. And no matter how loyal he is to me, a boss can't compare to a brother. He protected you when I was about to have Ethan followed after a disturbing conversation with Eamon, and I have no doubts that he would have done it all over again if I had asked him direct questions about you."

Jose rose an eyebrow, surprised that Raymond had been able to read into the depth of Christian's and his relationship. Though most people knew that they were close, he doubted anyone really knew how close they were. Like Raymond said, they were brothers. But then again …

"You underestimate his loyalty to you."

"Oh, believe me, I don't. I just know that some loyalties are stronger than others. There are some things that even _I_ can't come between. And love is one of them."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

After his conversation with Raymond, Jose completely forgo his plans to surprise Ethan for lunch and went directly to Christian's apartment to let him know what just happened. He had this nasty feeling that Raymond was starting to second-guess Christian's loyalty, and Christian ought to do something about it.

He let himself inside Christian's flat, recalling last minute that Christian had texted him early in the morning to let him know that he was going to Washington to handle some distribution problems. He was about to turn back on his feet immediately when he saw Ana sitting on the couch and looking at him with big blue eyes.

"Oh. I thought you would be Christian," He said, scratching his head suddenly feeling uncomfortable. Ever since the incident in Macau, he had barely seen Ana, especially after she had gotten her own car and used every excuse in the world to drive around by herself.

"Same here," She replied, probably as uncomfortable as him.

For a little while, an awkwardness grew between them. Though he had known since the beginning about her relationship with his best friend, he had never talked to her about it, except when he thought Christian was dead. And even that moment didn't end well. He knew that, as Christian's best friend, and only person in his entourage aware of the situation, he should try to be nice with the girl, but he couldn't.

Though he appreciated her as a person and thought she was a sweet girl, a part of him resented her for putting Christian in the situation he was at the moment. If it wasn't for her promise, Christian would have come clean to Raymond a long time ago. And her latest stunt the past month where she almost broke up with him because he simply wanted to take her out on a freaking date did nothing but put salt in the wound. So yeah, Jose did not like Ana as Christian's girlfriend. But he kept it for himself, especially after it became evident that Christian was head over the heels for the girl.

"Well, I should go. I'll call Christian later on," He said, but before turning and leaving the flat all to Ana, he caught a glimpse of what she was doing. On the coffee table before her were displayed papers and pictures, but that wasn't what retained Jose's attention. It was the beige file with written on it '_Federal Bureau of Investigation_' that put him on alert.

"What is that?" He asked rather coldly, not really caring of how rude he could sound at that moment. He walked closer, and so Christian's family name written on it, with two first names. Male and female.

"I fished it out of the trash bin. It's about Christian's parents," Ana said, confusing Jose more than giving him answers.

Christian never talked about his parents. In fact, he only mentioned once that his parents abandoned him at a young age, and that he had stopped caring about them and their abandonment around the time he switched to his third foster house. So it made no sense for him to suddenly going around looking for his parents. Even more by asking the FBI to do it for him, when Luke could probably do that shit with his eyes closed.

Jose glanced at the bin, understanding even less why Christian would throw away a file he had concocted. He felt Ana follow his gaze, and she shifted a little on her seat, before she justified herself, "When I woke up this morning, Christian was gone for his business trip, and this was in the bin. I didn't mean to look for it, but when I was about to throw the yoghurt, the name on the file caught my eyes, and …"

She didn't finish, but she didn't have to. Jose figured that he would have probably done the same. He wouldn't be snooping around, but he would be curious as to what Christian threw in the trash. He was torn away by his thoughts by Ana telling him,

"They're alive. Christian's parents. they live _here_, in New York. They're in Brooklyn."

"Christian wouldn't do a search on his parents," Jose finally said, because this was the thing bothering him. Christian had made peace with his parents being a part of his past he didn't want to look back on.

"Well, _I_ certainly didn't do it, and yet the file is here," Ana snapped, apparently annoyed to be suspected by Jose.

Jose sighed, trying to understand when his eyes fell on the beige file once again. He recalled Christian lightly mentioning that the FBI was trying to get to Raymond through him, and it finally became clear. This was the carrot they gave him. Christian didn't look for his parents, they were shoved down his throat, in the hope that he would cooperate afterwards.

"Christian wouldn't like you reading something that he disregarded to the trash," He let Ana know, his voice slightly colder than he intended.

Ana looked down on her knees, blushing, though she still said with a small voice, "Maybe, but he would like to have his parents back."

"I'm not sure about that," He countered.

"He's just too proud to admit it."

Jose didn't reply anything to that, though he was sceptical. He knew that Christian was a proud man, but he also knew that he was a man who didn't look back on his past, and who didn't forgive betrayal. And abandoning your child was the ultimate betrayal in Christian's eyes.

Ana sighed a little, before bringing her knees to her chest and telling Jose something he wasn't aware of, "Last month, Christian gave me the thing I wanted the most in this world. And I wasn't even aware that I wanted it so badly. He made me talk to my Dad about my mother. He gave me back my Mom, and I will never be able to thank him enough for that. But … what if I give him back his parents as well? I mean, wouldn't you give anything to see at least one of your parents again?"

Jose could see where she was coming from. She actually had a valid and solid point. He would trade everything he held dear in this world just to see his mother again. Even if it was for five minutes.

"Christian is just too proud to take the first step," She said with a quiet and reasoning voice, and though Jose was leaning toward her argument, there was still a huge red flag. He could see where Ana was going with this, and he knew that no matter the outcome, Christian wouldn't like it at all.

"Don't."

"What?"

"Don't invite them over here. Like you said, Christian is a proud man, and he won't take too kindly having them in his home. No matter what may come afterwards."

Ana seemed to think about it before she grabbed a picture and showed it to Jose. He took it, sitting next to her on the sofa, and analysing the photo. It was a family picture, where the three members were smiling at the camera. Christian must have been three, maybe four, wearing overalls whose knees were covert with dirt and grass. He was throwing in the air patches of grass, his mouth open with joy, and his chubby cheeks sticking out of his face. His father on his left was looking straight at the camera, looking nothing like Christian, if it weren't for his eyes and his hair colour. Christian got his good looks from his mother. His father might be average, but his mother was a babe. She was a female version of Christian, all his features softened by her delicate feminine features.

"Christian can say whatever he wants, but this is love I'm seeing in these pictures, Jose," Ana said, and Jose couldn't agree more. The family he saw in this picture didn't look like one where the parents would abandon their child, who would become a well known and fearsome criminal.

"How could he try to throw the only pictures of his childhood away?" Ana wondered out loud, probably thinking to herself.

"It is most likely that he didn't read the thing, Ana," he absentmindedly said, looking at the other pictures through the diverse papers. If this was the FBI's carrot, Christian probably threw away the file as soon as he got home.

Jose let his eyes wander from happy picture to happy picture, the names Grace and Carrick sticking out every now and then from the papers displayed on the table, but suddenly, he froze, and retrieved a paper from the pile. He read over it, dreading the capitals WITSEC and what it meant. His first thoughts went to Raymond. What was he playing at? It was very unlikely that Raymond didn't do research on Christian's parents, no matter what Christian thought on the matter. So why did he play with fire like that?

This ought to calm Jose and his hopes to reunite Christian with his parents through Ana. This was something that ought to be done very carefully. "I know that you want to help Christian, but … maybe you should let him deal with this on his own terms," He said, keeping the paper in his hand.

"Well, him dealing with this means throwing away the only thing that can help him contact his parents. This isn't dealing, this is avoiding."

"There are things that people don't want to confront, Ana. You know that better than anyone."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked with her eyes suspiciously squinted at him.

"You don't want to confront your father about Christian!" He snapped, almost regretting instantly when he saw tears gather in her eyes. She looked away, bringing once again her knees to her chest before she rested her chin on her knees.

"If I tell you something, can you not repeat Christian?"

Jose hesitated, but in the end, he agreed. He knew that Christian was bothered by the ban that Ana had put on their relationship, and maybe talking to her would give him more intel of what Christian should do so she would lift that ban.

"I'm not stupid. I know that Dad cares for Christian. I know he cares a lot for him. Christian appeared around the time Mike disappeared, and Dad had a whole to feel in his heart. He never replaced Mom, but he replaced Mike. And I know that Christian cares enormously for Dad. When he talks about Dad, I can tell that he admires him. But they are both _so_ stubborn.

If Christian and I go public, what is going to happen to them? Dad doesn't take well betrayal, and though I know he cares for Christian too much to do something drastic like _kill him_, he will come between us. And I will have to choose to which I will have to stand by. I don't want to choose between my Dad and Christian. I don't want to have to remove from my life one, to be with the other."

Jose looked at Ana, her eyes teary, but not shedding a single tear. He had to admit that he never really thought of how she could feel in this situation, but now that it was becoming apparent to him that she loved Christian as well, he could understand why she would delay to the most the moment when she would have to come out to her father. In truth, the fact that she wasn't considering siding immediately with her father proved to Jose that she loved Christian more than she knew. Ana adored her father, so much that he heard her tell her best friend about renouncing her dreams of moving out of the mansion, not wanting to leave her father alone. And yet, she was considering having t chose between him and Christian.

Still, there was still the very thin possibility that Raymond would not care, after all, like he did not care about Ethan and him. "And what if things turn out for the better?"

"What if they don't?" She immediately retorted. "I know that it's not fair to Dad because I'm lying to him about where I go and what I do. And I know it's not fair to Christian because he has to hide when it's not in his nature. But … I don't want to risk losing one of them. _Or worse_, both of them.."

"Why don't you just tell Christian? I'm sure he'd like this explanation better than 'I don't want Dad to know'."

"Because I know what he's going to say. He's going to be sweet, and nice, and gentle, and it won't change anything. No matter how much he'll say he'll stand by me, I can't know for sure that this will still be true when Dad knows. I've thought about it a thousand times. Either they decided to never speak to one another, making me chose between them, and forcing me to destroy the life of the other. Either Christian pushes me toward Dad to keep him happy, and therefore, making me second in his life. I think this would be the worst case … Christian putting my father first, and my feelings and opinions second …"

Jose was at a loss for words. Ana was right, no matter what Christian said, she would never be sure before the truth was out. And like any self-preserving person, she was delaying that moment as much as she could. He couldn't blame her. But he couldn't help but feel that if she shared her insecurities with Christian, it would calm his own,

"I think you should tell him what you just told me. Because right now, all he sees is that he's your dirty little secret. And though he doesn't say anything about it, it is eating him inside."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**💚Also, please take note that Ana never mentions regretting getting with Christian. she had several opportunities to say that she should never have had sex with Christian, or that she shouldn't have made a deal with him, to begin with, but she doesn't. Because, no matter what, she doesn't regret it … yet**

**💚So, it is on purpose that I did not explain the capitals. Either you already know what it is, either you are too impatient and you search on the internet, either you are a nice reader, and you wait for the story to explain it to you **😉**. I hope you will go for the latter one. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** What did you think of Raymond's and Jose's discussion?**

**💚 How about Ana's and Jose's?**

**💚 How about this whole thing about Christian's parents? How do you think he will react?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	44. Chapter 43: Confrontations

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 43****: Confrontations (4,5K)**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**💚 I just want to take the time to thank all of those who review on this story. You have no idea what this means to me. And I truly hope you won't go chop my head off or seek a poltergeist on me after this chapter …**

**💚 To be honest, I cannot wait to read your reactions to this chapter. So even if you usually don't leave reviews, let me know what you thought of this chapter. Really **

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**Christian's PoV **

**I need to see you as soon as possible. Jose **

**No can do. I have a date waiting for me. Maybe tomorrow. Christian **

**You seeing Ana, tonight? Jose **

**Well, I don't see with who else I am going to have a date. Christian **

**I talked with her yesterday …and, well I think that Ana's afraid of you leaving her. Jose **

**What do you mean? Christian **

**I promised not to repeat what she said, but basically, she's scared that if you were to choose between Raymond and her, you'd pick Raymond. Jose **

**Why would she even go there? Christian **

**Because if you come out in the open, it's a possibility. A very HIGH possibility. If Raymond learns about you and his daughter, he might not like the lie, or even that YOU are dating his daughter. I mean, let's be honest, you're not perfect son-in-law material. And you might bend to him because your loyalty to him would be stronger than your feelings for Ana. Jose **

**That's ridiculous. Christian **

**No really. You've known Raymond for more than twelve years, and Ana for a year or so. And you're not the easiest person to read or to talk to. I doubt that you're ever putting your feelings out there. Even with Ana. No matter how much you love her, how can she be sure you won't ditch her when you will have to choose between Raymond and her. Jose **

From the back of the cab, Christian stared at his phone, reading over and over Jose's last text. He knew that Jose wasn't all wrong, he didn't come across as a person one could read like a book. But he was working on it, especially with Ana. He opened up to her about things he never told anyone, not even Raymond. And he knew for a fact that he was less in control of his emotions when it was only the two of them. He wouldn't go as far as to say that he wore his feelings raw on his face, but he didn't hold back as much as he usually did.

And yet, Ana doubted his commitment to her. She was the one holding them back, but _he_ was the one who had to prove he was in this relationship for the long run. There was no logic in this reasoning, and all Christian could make of it was that he and Ana needed some conversation about those insecurities she confided in Jose.

**Don't go home and start blabbering about all of that. I'm not even supposed to tell you half of this. And to be honest, I don't think Ana would be convinced by anything you would say. She would be more of a gestures kind of girl. Jose **

**How bigger of a gesture than risking it all to tell her father!? Christian **

**I don't know Christian. I'm just telling you that words won't help you. Maybe you should just wait and let her see for herself that she's getting worked up for nothing. Let her see that she's overthinking it and that everything will work out, in the end. Jose **

Christian loudly sighed, closing his eyes and resting his head back as the cab neared the Washington airport. This was not something he had expected. Sure, a part of him was feeling better that Ana didn't put a leash on their relationship simply because she liked the secrecy better, but … he wasn't sure how he felt knowing that she doubted him like that.

On several occasions, Christian had chosen Ana over Raymond, or at least done his best to honour both of them, but since he never told her the whole truth, she didn't know. Like when she asked why he killed her Godfather, and that he told her that she'd rather not know, avoiding having to tell her that he had simply been following her father's orders. For good reasons, but orders still. Or when he edited so much of the truth that it almost became another reality when it came to her brother and his demise.

And suddenly, something else came to Christian's mind, annoying him even more. Why did Ana confide in Jose, rather than him? Though Jose and Ana weren't estranged, Christian knew that they weren't close as well. It felt weird to Christian that Ana would rather talk about her insecurities to Jose, than to him. If it had been Katherine or Elliott, he would have understood, they were her best friends. Even Mia was a more plausible outcome than Jose. Jose was _his_ best friend, not Ana's, so why did she confide in him?

There was also the matter that Jose thought that Raymond wouldn't approve of them, and Christian had problems arguing with him on this one. Several times already, Jose mentioned the fact that Raymond had always done his best to protect his daughter from his world, and keep her in the dark. Christian being his second in command, and his most likely successor, it was hardly plausible that Raymond would gracefully take his daughter being with him. Despite the betrayal and the sneaking around. It was ore the fact that Raymond wouldn't let his daughter end up with a criminal.

Raymond himself confirmed this at Katherine's wedding when he and Eamon reminisced of the past and talked about the bride and groom. Christian remembered perfectly how Raymond nonchalantly said that would a kid like Elliott go after his daughter, he wouldn't be so hard on the young man. And Christian was anything but like Elliott Cohen. Elliott Cohen was a straight-A student, who did charity and went to the synagogue on Saturdays. Christian was a criminal who stole, killed, tortured and laundered money without batting an eye. still, if he had to choose, Christian would still always take the path of his own life. Elliott Cohen's life was too pristine and predictable for him.

As he was nearing the airport, Christian thought of how he could reassure Ana on her fears, without selling his friend out. And the more he thought about it, the less he came up with a solution. Until he decided that he would stop trying to make her go his way. If she wanted to take the slow and reassuring road of secrecy, making sure of his feelings for her this way, that's how they would go. He couldn't see what else he could do but wait for her to be ready to be public. Any attempt on his part would feel like he was forcing her toward a light she was not ready, or willing, to face.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian got home a few hours later, he skipped on his meditation ritual and went straight to the shower, ignoring Bastille who came to greet him. His wash was quick, and before he knew it, he was in his bedroom, slipping in his bed next to Ana. This was probably one of his favourite part of his relationship with Ana, going home and finding her sleeping in his bed, whether it was planned like this night, or unexpected. It was something simple, and yet, it made him feel like it wasn't only his apartment, but _their_ home.

With a goofy smile on his face, he snuggled against her, taking her in his arms and gently kissed her. But what he had intended as something chaste and innocent arouse in him something hotter. He felt himself harden, and trailed his kisses to her neck, right where he knew she was the most sensitive, while his fingers went down to her sweet little nub.

Slowly, but surely, he worked her up, only encouraged by her moans of pleasure. He could tell she wasn't sleeping anymore, but she wasn't awake yet either. She was just in between, probably refusing to take the final step toward conciseness, afraid to wake from a good dream.

Just as he increased the speed of his fingers inside her, his thumb playing with her sensitive button, Ana let out a gasp, arching herself and finally opening her eyes. Christian let go of the breast he was suckling on, looking deep into those blue eyes he loved so much. She smiled to him, her hips moving at the rhythm of his hand before she let out an 'oh' of surprise, her eyes opening wide and her body suddenly all tense as her climax washed through her.

Christian smiled to her, slowly retrieving his hand to lubricate his member as he kissed the brunette, but as he was about to penetrate his girl, Ana stopped him and pushed on his shoulders, forcing him to lay on his back. Then, she straddled him and rode him as she pleased. Christian let her take control, doing his best to not take by the rhythm of their lovemaking by losing his hands in her hair. He loved when she was on top, because he felt her on a whole different angle, even more after they decided to forgo condoms. But he also knew that she liked to set the cadence while in this position.

He felt her walls spasm around his shaft and soon, she was screaming, milking him before she fell limp on his chest. Christian didn't even let her breathe for a second and flipped her so she would have her front laying against the mattress. He upped her reared just a little, so he could dive into her warm and wet entrance, being nothing but gentle about it.

Ana screamed with pleasure, making Christian smile as he mercilessly pounded into the girl. He loved how vocal Ana had gotten over the months. At first, she had always been rather quiet, doing her best to keep it down; but now, she would scream so loud that Christian was sure that Mia on the first floor could hear her. As droplets of sweat started falling from his hair, Christian grabbed Ana's hair, making her arch so the curve of her smaller back would be even more marked.

She screamed several profanities, her hand fisting the sheets, and when his name came from the depth of her throat, he slapped her backside several times, earning pleasured groans each time. Without ever stopping, the hand that was grabbing her hair left to get a hold on her neck, and he reached his climax as she moved her ass, creating an unexpected friction and making him come earlier than he had intended. Ana came seconds after him, moving at her speed and claiming her orgasm on his still leaking member.

"You should definitely leave town more often," She said with a dopey smile, still trying to catch her breath.

Christian didn't reply anything, simply slightly shaking his head as he smiled back, pecking her shoulders and removing the sticky hair from her face. She had already told him several times that his lovemaking was always more intense when he came back from a business trip, even if it was a trip he handled within a day.

Without having really moved, the two of them laid on their stomachs, still linked by their most intimate parts. Christian lovingly watched his girlfriend, and before he could even process the words properly in his head, he blurted out, "I love coming home to you sleeping in my bed."

"I love when you come back, period," She joked, obviously referring to his near-death experience a few months back.

He chuckled a bit, before slowly retrieving himself from her. He saw her wince a little and went to the bathroom. After quickly relieving himself, he rinsed it out and took a towel out of the drawer so he could soak it with hot water. When he got back to his room, he gave it to Ana who thankfully smiled and rolled on her back, before putting the towel between her legs.

"Monster-cock strikes again," She teased, playfully pretending to be in agony, which made Christian roll his eyes at the young girl.

"Don't pretend, I know you love it."

She smiled, slightly blushing, both of them perfectly aware that she liked it better when he was rough on her. Apparently, it was in those moments that Ana felt that Christian completely let loose and stopped trying to be in control. But though Christian liked the intercourse in itself, he didn't particularly like that she ended up sore in the end.

He had always made a point of staying focused when he was with a woman because he knew that his well developed 'monster-cock' was a lot to handle. But sometimes, he let himself go with Ana, especially when she moved a certain way, and all he could do about it was care for her afterwards. A few time, he did mention to her that they should avoid certain positions (the ones who set him 'wild' as she would say), but Ana always refused. She always said that it was more a discomfort than a real pain and that at the given moment, all she felt was the pleasure.

For a moment, the two lovers did not say a word, Ana on her back with her towel between her legs while her head rested on Christian's laps who gently caressed her hair, his eyes lost into space. Minutes passed before Ana broke their peaceful moment with the sentence she always used after they started having sex without condoms,

"I have to pee." *****

*** For those of you who aren't … experienced, always pee after sex! Especially unprotected sex. Nature did things right! Even if you don't feel like it, always use the bathroom. **

Christian slipped beneath the sheets and watched Ana pick up her gown from the floor when she came back. She put it on, crawling back into bed, and he muttered, "You could have let it on the floor."

"What if there is a fire? Do you want a fireman to see me naked?" She retorted with a small smirk. And though he knew she was joking, he had to admit that he wasn't that thrilled at the idea of her being naked in front of other men. Actually, he wasn't thrilled at all, and as long as he could prevent it, he would.

"What are you doing tomorrow evening?" She asked, tracing lines on his naked chest. Christian mentally checked his agenda, before letting her know,

"I have a few errands to run during the day, but I should be free around seven, and for the rest of the night. Is that good for you?"

She nodded, before turning the conversation toward a whole different topic, "You know that Dad is out of town for the week, right?"

Christian made an affirmative sound, wondering where this conversation could lead. Raymond had gone to Vegas the same day he left for Washington, because Gigi, the new manager, had called for an emergency. Christian had proposed to Raymond to fly straight to Vegas after he handled his Washington business, but Raymond assured him that there was no need for it, he would take care of everything himself.

"I was thinking … maybe we could eat out."

This ought to stop Christian in his soothing circles over Ana's skin and look down on her. Sure this wasn't the officialisation he had been hoping for, but it was a start. At least he could take his girl out on a date, in town.

"I know a cute little place in Coney Island. It's really good," She insisted, though she did not look up to meet his eyes.

"Wherever you want to go," Christian told her, too happy to really care where they would eat, or the fact that though she had lifted her head, she did not look at him in the eyes.

"But you have to keep an open mind once we're there," She warned him. Christian promised, bringing her lips to his before laying her on her back and forgetting the fact that she was still a little sore. That night, he did not give her even the slightest rest.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian checked the text Ana sent him, to be sure that he had the address right, before pulling over and leaving his car to a valet. The place was what Christian had expected of Ana, some fancy restaurant that probably served expensive exotic food that couldn't hold a candle to Mrs Parvati. Though, he had yet to find a cuisine he found as good at Mrs Parvati's.

As he walked to the reception, he considered calling Ana, to know if she was already there and if she made a reservation. She had told him that she would cab it so they would be able to come home together, and still do whatever they had to do before. But as he took his phone out, he saw that Ana texted him that she was already there.

So he told the hostess that he was meeting with a pretty brunette, not sure under which name Ana presented herself; and he followed the hostess to a secluded table at the other end of the restaurant. As he walked to his table with the hostess, Christian had the surprise to see that Ana was not alone, but with an older couple.

He told the hostess that he would take it from there, and made the rest of the way alone, trying to figure out where he could have seen the couple before. They seemed familiar, and since they were with Ana, it probably meant that he had seen them at one of those functions he hated so much to go to.

The man was quite tall, his hair brown, though it was thinning on the edge, and greying at the roots. He was probably in his mid-fifties, small reading glasses on his nose to prove his defaulting vision. The woman was taller than Ana, her hair copper and tied up in a bun, and her face looking like one of those porcelain dolls.

But it was only once he was at the table, clearing his throat to make himself known that Christian recognised the two strangers at the table. The both of them looked up at him, Christian observing the same shade of grey in the man's eyes as in his. The woman's eyes immediately filled with tears, her lips quivering, but Christian couldn't care less.

For a moment, he did nothing, his brain blocking everything as he was trying to comprehend how his _parents_ ended up crashing on his date when he hadn't heard from them for over two decades. And finally, he started connecting the dots. _Ana_ was the one who organised all of this. She probably found that piece of shit that Christian threw in the trash without ever opening it, and coordinated this whole masquerade, pretending that she wanted for them to have a date night in order to get him to meet … _them_.

He snapped his head to her, his features horrifyingly cold, and she had the nerve to try and give him a small hopeful smile. He clenched his jaw, refusing to make a scene in a restaurant; but when the man took a step closer to him, it was the last straw.

"Son …"

Christian turned his head to the man, looking at him from head to toe, and making the older man thankful that looks couldn't kill. He stumbled on his words, forgetting what he wanted to say, and Christian looked at his wife as if she was vermin on his shoes before turning on his heels and walking away.

He was just in the middle of the restaurant when Ana caught up with him, and stopped him, simply by putting her hand on his arm. He refused to look at her, keeping his anger at bay as she said, "Just sit with them, even if it's just for a moment. They did not leave you. It's not their f—"

"I am not interested in sharing a meal with dead people. But you do you, Ana."

"Christian, _please_," She pleaded, making him snap his head at her. He glared, making her shiver at the coldness he emanated. He knew that she had never seen him so cold before, but he had never been so angry before, either. At this right instant, he didn't care much about protecting Ana from his work habits, and the tole they had on him.

He couldn't believe that she went digging into his trash. He couldn't believe that she contacted the last people in the world he ever wanted to talk to. He couldn't believe that no matter how many times he had told her to drop it, she still pushed the issue of his parents. He couldn't believe that what he thought would be their first date in the city ended up being a set-up to meet _them_.

And most of all, he couldn't believe that she went behind his back! This was the thing he had the most difficulty to swallow. Everything else, he could take. But having Ana go behind his back when he told her on more than one occasion that it was the one thing he would not tolerate … it made him want to punch someone. Especially when she double-crossed him to make him talk to his parents. A topic that had been talked about over and over again with the same ended, _he was not interested_.

He took a deep calming breath, glancing around in the restaurant, only to see that people were all minding their business, or at least pretending. He saw that the man and woman at his former table were hopefully looking at him, wishing that by some miracle he would walk back to them, and then he left the restaurant, without sparing a glance at Ana.

Still, Ana followed him to his car, silently hanging her head low. As he drove them out of Brooklyn, Christian did not utter a single word, seething with rage and barely containing it. Ana respected his wish for silence, but still, when she saw the road he was taking, she blinked, and asked with a teary voice,

"I'm not going home with you?" He was driving her back to her mansion, and no matter how sad her voice was, it didn't change his resolve for even one bit,

"I don't want you near me, right now," He said in a deadly cold whisper.

From the corner of his eye, he saw tears roll down her cheeks, but he kept his eyes on the road until he finally pulled over in front of her mansion. Without saying a word, he tapped the code that would give him access to her driveway. Once there, he stopped the car and waited for Ana to exit the car.

When she didn't, he demanded of her, "Leave. Before I say something that I might regret."

"They didn't leave you, Christian," She tried to plead, playing with Christian's nerves. "They—"

"I DON'T CARE! You had no rights to make this little arrangement, just like you had no right to look into that file!"

She hiccuped while he glared at her, his breath short. This was not going the way he wanted. He wanted to go home and cool down, or at least let his anger out on someone else than Ana, but she was pushing him, and with so many faults on her, it was so easy to let it all out on her.

"I just wanted to reunite you with your parents. Like you did for me," She sobbed, making Christian clench his fists hard to keep at least a little bit of control.

"What don't you understand in 'I don't care'?! Don't try and turn this into something sweet! This was _anything_ but sweet! Twisted, backstabbing, corrupted, but it _wasn't_ sweet! Who the fuck do _you_ think you are to push _me _into something I told you over and over I had no interest in?!"

"I thought that —"

"What? You thought it would be like in one of your movies?" He sarcastically cut her off. "You thought I'd tear up a bit and that I'd hug them, and I would end up thanking you for fixing all the problems in my life and bringing me my parents back?! _Life isn't sweet_, Ana! How many times will I have to tell you?!"

Ana's tears were endless but barely moved Christian. Mostly because he avoided looking at them. He set his eyes on the windshield, waiting for her to finally leave his car so he could go on with his night.

"I'm sorry," She sobbed. But all Christian did was lean over and open her door.

"You should leave, now."

Ana blinked, holding a whimper in the back of her throat, while her tears never stopped to fall, "Are you breaking up with me?"

Christian clenched his jaw, ignoring her question on purpose. In all honesty, he was so angry at this instant that he would rather not make any decision that he could regret come morning. And breaking up with Ana would be one of them. He saw that she expected an answer, hiccuping more and more as she tried to hold back her cries.

"You should leave, now." He coldly repeated, not sparing her a glance.

A strangled wail came out of her, but she still left, and once he was sure she was inside her house, Christian drove back to his own place, calling Luke using the Bluetooth of his car to do so. He didn't even bother with being nice about his request, and immediately demanded,

"I want everything you have on Jason Taylor. He's an FBI agent. You have an hour."

"An hour? But Christian —"

"An hour, Sawyer," He roared, before ending the phone conversation.

Then, he drove back home, his anger never flattening, and once in his flat, he paced, waiting for Luke to text him with the information he wanted and completely ignoring Bastille who was observing him go from on end of the apartment, to the other. When he checked his phone for the umpteenth time, he saw a text from Ana.

**I truly am sorry. Please, don't leave me over this. Ana**

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**💚So, … I know you hate me. You hate Ana. Some of you might hate Christian for what/how he said. But … remember that Christian told Ana to never go behind her back. All the way back in Okinawa, he explicitly told her that he did not take that course of action well. And remember that Ana often told Christian that parents were important, and always loved their children, no matter what. So both are entitled to how they acted, it stays in their character arc … Even if you hate it**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** What did you think of the sweet moment we had at the beginning?**

**💚 How about what Jose did?**

**💚 How do you feel about Christian and his last moments?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	45. Chapter44:What Happened To Mr & Mrs Grey

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 44****: What Happened To Mr & Mrs Grey (6,5K)**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**💚 So, I have to say, many of you feel like Ana did not listen to Jose, and she did. Jose agreed with Ana when she said that Christian should be reunited with his parents, which is why he did not mention it to Christian. But home is a sacred thing, and he feels that Christian wouldn't like strangers in his home. which Ana acknowledged. Her first intention was to do something at home, and it was because Jose advised against that idea that she went with plan B and the restaurant. So no, Ana is not devious to the point she used that date thing on purpose, she just didn't think it through.**

**💚 Also, I think it's funny how everyone is pissed at Ana for going against Christian's wishes, but everyone roots for Christian when he wants to do the same to Ana and go tell Raymond ... Just saying ...**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

After Luke sent him a file concerning everything there was to know about Jason Taylor, Christian told him that they should meet the next night. Then he called Ryan, not really caring that it was the middle of the night and that the man was probably sleeping, and he asked him to cover for him on a few appointments he needed to bail the next day. Ryan didn't ask any questions, Christian's tone being cold enough to not be questioned.

In the morning, Christian postponed the few meetings he knew Ryan could not cover for him, whereas it was because they were official business, or because people would get offended if they dealt with anyone that was neither Christian or Raymond. Once he had all his day cleared, he popped in a few places in town, before showing up at the Taylor's apartment, knowing that there was only his wife there at the time.

All night long, he had read through the file depicting the life of the FBI agent, trying to see which approach he would have. He was going tired of having that leech on him, trying to shake him so he could bend his way. And he was now very much pissed that Jason's little game led to Ana going behind his back and scheming things she had no business in.

He was angry, even more, he was furious. But it wasn't much because Ana had reached to his parents. It was in her nature to see the good in people and to forgive what shouldn't be forgiven. He should know, she forgave him her Godfather's death. So it wasn't the fact that Ana tried to patch him up with his parents that angered Christian. In truth, he was sure that, had Ana been a little bit more like her father, she would have looked for his parents a long time ago.

No, what angered Christian was the way she did it. A part of him was sure that, if she had come clean and told him that she wanted him to meet his parents, he would have conceded to her demands. It would have taken a lot of talking and pleading, but he would have agreed, because like Jose often pointed it out, he didn't know how to refuse to her. But instead, she schemed behind his back, and would it have been anybody else, that person would no longer be breathing. It was the act in itself that Christian had troubles swallowing. They were supposed to be in a trusting relationship, especially given the secrecy of it, but this course of action barely called for trust.

With a loud sigh, Christian knocked on the apartment door where Jason and Lucy Taylor lived, and he was greeted by a smiling black woman. Just by looking at her, Christian knew that she was one of those naive people who thought that her husband was a desk guy for the Bureau. She was the depiction of a suburban housewife with her hair perfectly curled, her dress properly ironed, and even her little apron, slightly tainted by flour.

"Can I help you?" She asked with slight concern in her black eyes, and Christian put on his best innocent smile, playing his part.

"I was looking for Jason? I've been told that he lives here?"

"Oh, he's out picking up the kids. You are?"

"I'm Michael. Jason helped me stay back on tracks when I was a teen, and since I am in town, I thought I'd pay him a visit," He lied through his teeth, making the far too trusty wife open wide her door, and tell him,

"Well, come on in. He won't be long. I'm sure he would love to chat with you. Jason always likes having visits from his old proteges."

Christian followed the chubby woman with the too good nature, and sat in the kitchen, accepting the iced-tea and biscuits that she proposed to him. According to the file, a decade or so ago, Jason used to help young delinquents stay out of jail and find jobs or schools. It was a part-time thing, in addition of his regular job at the FBI, and though it was written nowhere on the file, Christian was sure that Jason had taken that little extra job to earn a little bit more money. It coincided just when Lucy, his wife got pregnant with their first child.

In truth, if there was anything that Christian could envy from Jason Taylor, it was this apple-pie life he had with his wife and kids. This was Jason second's marriage, but the only one where he had kids. His wife was younger than him by twelve years and gave him two children that were respectively eleven and seven years old.

Lucy asked what he was doing now, and he told her that he was living in New-Orleans, working as an accountant for some big society. And as he expected it, the black woman praised him for turning out so good. She blabbered about the importance of staying on the right side of the law, and finally, Jason entered the flat with his two children.

The young boy, Evan looked a lot like his father, except that he had his mother colouring. The little girl Sasha, was a mix of the two, though her skin tone was only peculiar to her since she was an albino. The two kids barely said hello, before rushing to their rooms while their father froze, seeing who was sitting at his kitchen table.

"One of your former protégés came back to town," Lucy sweetly said to her husband, while Christian knowingly smirked at Jason.

During all those months Jason had been trying to get him to betray Raymond, he had never come to his place because though Christian was sure that the FBI agent knew where he lived, he had no leverage there. Which was why he came up with those files concerning Michael, or Raymond, or his parents. Jason had no personal leverage over Christian, nothing that would make his blood freeze, just like his own just froze.

"Lucy, honey, why don't you take some cookies to the kids? I have to catch up with _Michael_," Jason calmly said, though his eyes never left Christian.

Lucy glanced at Christian who gave her a warm smile as if nothing was wrong, and once she had disappeared from the kitchen, Christian's face returned to his usual unreadable-self. Jason slowly sat on a chair facing Christian, and said,

"So, you have a push-button after all. Rumours of you being cold and unfathomable are wrong, after all."

"I do have a push-button. But it's not the one you think," Christian conceded, though he was not going to give Jason the satisfaction to tell him where to look for. But apparently, Jason already had his idea on the matter,

"Oh … I should have followed my instincts after all when I saw you around Christmas. I should have gone with my guts and use Raymond's daughter to make you sing."

Christian rose a questioning eyebrow, feigning ignorance, even though he knew that Jason had seen clearly in his game.

"You see, yesterday night, I got a call from _Mommy dearest_. She was rather distraught because you refused to even listen to what she had to say. But between two sobs, she did say that a cute little blue-eyed brunette was the one who tried to organise your epic reunion. I emphasise on the word 'try'."

Christian let out a small smirk, not really caring if Jason Taylor knew his secrets. He had him by the balls, even if Jason wasn't aware of that yet, and like any vicious feline on this planet, he was going to play with his food, first.

"You have been barking at the wrong tree," He admitted with a small nod of his head, his eyes hard on the man in front of him. "But now, you pissed me off."

"So you decided to come and threaten me in my own house? Do you think I can easily be scared like that?"

Christian's smirk didn't flatter, on the contrary. He slid a rather thin brown envelop in Jason's direction, who eyed it suspiciously before haughtily say,

"If you think you can bribe me, this—"

"I know a man who can be bribed when I see one. And you are not one of them. You have a code, and you stick to it. And I respect that. This isn't a bribe, at all.

You see, contrarily to popular belief, I am a generous man. This is the proof of my … _generosity_."

Jason curiously looked back at the envelope, but before he could reach it, Christian stopped him, and told him, "Before we go on that matter, I do have to admit that you managed to get me curious on something. Why would Grace Grey contact you when failing to see me?"

"Because the Bureau owes her a debt." Christian waited for Jason to continue, and so the agent snapped with sass, "We lost her son, and he turned into a criminal."

This picked up Christian's interest for a moment. He sat a bit more comfortable in his chair, and waved Jason, "Go on, tell your tale."

"It is all in the file that I gave you."

"Because we all know how eager I was to read that piece of shit."

Christian could swear that Jason was annoyed to have to explain everything he had put together into paper, but it wasn't much like he had a choice.

"Twenty-one years ago, your parents got caught in the middle of some nasty political business. It was a different administration, and people disappeared more easily than today. So, in order to keep your family alive, they were put into the WITSEC. Well, back then it was simply called the witness protection program. Just until the trial occurred.

Now, for matters of blurring the lines, the guy who worked on your parents' case convinced them that it would be best for you to disappear at a different time than them. It's easy to trace children, even back then. It's a child's play. Doctor's appointments, school, special medicine. So the deal was to put you in a foster home for two weeks, before transferring you, and getting you back during the transfer to a 'new family'.

But like I said, it was a different time, with a different administration. There were a lot of moles back then, and one of them put you in the wrong family during the transfer, in order to make your parents come out. It took a lot of convincing and promises to get your parents to stay put. And it got messy because you were in the system. So we had to erase you first, and then find a way to take you out of the foster family without raising suspicion, and then take you to your parents. But, it's a lot of paperwork. Especially given the fact that you were a child. And every time we were close to getting you, you were transferred to a new family.

And by the time the trial was done, you had disappeared into thin air. Your parents spent a lot of money looking for you, not really trusting us to do the job. They paid PI and psychics. But you were gone. And when you came back into our radar, it was under Raymond Steele's protection. I didn't know about all of this until I started looking into your life. Your parents' case had been closed for years. There are more important things than looking for long lost children that are probably dead.

But when I connected two and two, I didn't contact your parents right away, just like I didn't give you the file right away. I mean, how do you tell a mother that the sweet little boy she has been desperately looking for is now a cold-blooded killer, enrolled by one of the most powerful mafias in the world?"

During the whole story, Christian was barely moved. If he were honest with himself, though he appreciated knowing that his parents didn't leave because of him, that didn't change the way he saw them. They could have been abducted by aliens for all he cared, that it wouldn't have changed anything. They left him. He had made peace with that a long time ago, around the time he met with Mrs Parvati and knowing the truth didn't change his feelings.

"What trial?" He asked, his mind going a step further than what Jason was saying. Witness protection wasn't something that was easily given out. It was a costly program that did not always worth its cost. So the Bureau had always been carefully handpicking who it would protect. And usually, they protected people from the mafia …

"It's classified."

"Humour me," Christian insisted, his tone a bit colder, and Jason shook his head, understand where Christian was heading,

"It's not what you think. Like I said, it was a _political_ mess. Something international where the mafia was never even mentioned. It was before you were a criminal, or working for Raymond, and to be honest I doubt that Raymond knows about your parents. They are classified as well."

Christian repressed a mocking chuckle, amused by Jason's delusion that anything could escape Raymond's knowledge. He sighed a little, annoyed that he had to go through all this mess, over something that ridiculous,

"So all of this shit you've been putting on me, for some other shit that happened years ago, and that no one cares about anymore."

"Well, it got me your attention," Jason smugly said, and making Christian chuckle. If Jason thought that telling him about his parents suddenly created some bond between them, he was sadly mistaking.

"Did you, now?"

"It wasn't easy I have to admit. I tried the brain, first. I told you about Raymond and what he did to his son … Well, what I think he did to his son. But it didn't make you budge. I tried the nostalgia, giving you your parents on a silver platter, but given your reaction now, this isn't the reason why you are here today. I'd put my money that it is the heart that shakes you off your high horse. The cute little blue-eyed brunette that tried to bring you and your parents together. How many blue-eyed brunettes are in your entourage, Christian Grey?"

Christian smirked, admitting that Jason was right, if it wasn't for Ana, he wouldn't be there. "As I said, you have been barking at the wrong tree."

"I should have followed my guts, and not waste my time on those useless tropes," Jason mumbled, more to himself than to Christian.

"You should have."

Jason seemed to suddenly have a regain of confidence, probably taking Christian's admission of his secret affair as a carrot he could turn into a stick against the young man. "So? What is it going to take me for you to sing for me? How about full immunity for you and your girl? You don't even have to worry about the money, most of Raymond's clean businesses are already under her name."

Christian knew that, except for Robinson Inc, all of Raymond's official businesses were in Ana's name. His hotels, casinos and restaurants throughout the world where all in the young girl's name, just like they had been under her mother's name before her. It was a security that Raymond took, that, should he die or end up in jail, his daughter would not be penniless.

Still, he couldn't believe that Jason thought that now, he had some kind of leverage over him. He seemed to forget who he was dealing with, and where they were. He smirked, indulging himself with a small mocking laugh as he asked,

"You think that _you're_ going to make _me_ sing? Do I have to remind me where we are right now?"

"You wouldn't have come to my place where any colleague of mine can barge in at any time if you didn't want something out of me. You're too clever to put yourself in such a position."

"I'm glad you mention what I want," Christian smiles, looking down at the envelope. Jason took it, and all the colours left his face when he opened it. He turned it upside down, revealing a lock of pale blond hair, almost white, in it.

"You see, I was trying to figure out in which school I would put my kids later on. Needless to say, George A. Jackson's lack of security put me off. Through Sasha seems like a nice girl. She didn't notice a thing ... this time."

It seemed that Jason was seeing a ghost, before he recovered himself slightly and looked up, whispering, "_You wouldn't_."

"You think I'm above hurting a kid?" Christian challenged, quirking his eyebrow up. He knew this was the difference between him and Raymond, he didn't have limits. In this department, Christian never hesitated on threatening the life of a child so he could have what he wanted. Raymond, on the other hand, as most mobsters, was reluctant to go to such length. He already did, but always as a last resort.

"I have no limits when it comes to protecting those I care about," Christian clarifies, so Jason would understand full well that his next words were not to be taken lightly.

"And this is where my generosity kicks in. I am leaving on a business trip that will last for a week or so. When I come back, I want to hear all about your transfer in some other State. I hear Cali is nice. Cool weather, great schools and interesting cases for a guy like you."

"You can't threaten me like that!" Jason roared, though this didn't bother Christian the least in the world. He simply smirked, leaning in as he explained his point-of-view,

"I'm not threatening you, I'm giving you an option. You take your sweet little kids and your sweet little wife, and you leave this city. You don't talk about Raymond or Idris. You don't come near any Steele or any person I talk to, personally or professionally. And if I hear that you so much breathe next to someone I know or use the same WiFi, I won't be giving you a lock of sweet little Sasha'a hair."

The two men stared at one another, Christian seeing that Jason was feeling anything but comfortable. Still, in a last attempt to still be in the game, Jason retorted, "Two can play that game, Grey. If you try to uproot me, I'm going to tell your boss of your dirty little secret."

Christian laughed out loud. "But who ever told you that Raymond doesn't already know?"

He was full on bluffing, but this was something he knew could work. Raymond was known to be a very private man when it came to his personal life. Which was one of the reasons why Michael's disappearance didn't rise much suspicion? And since Christian knew Jason would try to use his relationship with Ana against him, he used this aspect of Raymond's life in his favour. After all, it was only logical to think that his daughter and second in command would do the same.

And just as Christian had planned it, Jason bought his bluff, dawning the fact that he just lost his best card to Christian. "And will sweet little Ana say, if she knew that you're covering her daddy's dirty secret?"

Once again, Christian chuckled, a cold demeanour emanating from him. "You _really_ think you can keep pulling last second threats? You _really_ think _you_ can threaten _me_?" Christian took a moment to appreciate the cuteness of the situation. It seemed that, though Jason studied him, he never took him as a serious opponent. Either that, or he did not do his research well.

"Go ahead, go see her with your miserable little file. If you think that Anastasia Steele will take the words of a stranger without proofs over the ones of her own father, good for you. But if you approach Raymond's daughter within a ten miles radius, don't come crying back to me. Because whatever Raymond will do to you, my option will always be better."

And though Christian clearly didn't want Jason to be the one to inform Raymond of his relationship with Ana, he also knew that the pathetic agent would not last a day if he approached Ana. Especially if he approached her with news that could disrupt the harmony of their family.

With a sigh of satisfaction, Christian got up, straightening his clothes before he rested his hand on Jason's shoulder,

"You thought that Raymond was the big fish, and you are right. But you forgot that sometimes, the small fish can be even more lethal than the big one … You should have cuffed me when you had the chance. now, I am giving you the opportunity to make the right decision, at the right time. _Leave while I am still giving you the chance to_."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

After his little talk with Jason Taylor, Christian went straight to what he called the headquarters. It was a building in Queens where he would meet with suppliers and dealers, and where most of the staff met when they wanted some privacy. Of course, officially it was just the factory of a dying knitting magazine.

There he saw Ryan who gave him a brief report of how the day had been, and once it was over, Christian informed him that he was to take over for a week since he was going to Russia. Ryan proposed to go with him, but Christian refused, saying that he would take O'Neill with him. Since he was leaving, he would rather have Ryan replace him, out of all the men on the field, he was the one he trusted the most.

As they were going over the agenda, Luke came in, and Christian dismissed Ryan, telling him that they would finish this later. Ryan left, not without worriedly looking from Christian to Luke, who seemed uncomfortable to have been summoned like that.

"Do you know why I asked you to come?"

"Not really? Is it because of that FBI guy you made me research yesterday night?" It was obvious that he had no idea of what he did wrong. With a sigh, Christian thought that he ought to put some order into the men when he would come back, and he let Luke know,

"I was under the impression that you were to become the Steele girl shadow," Christian mused. It had been a while since he wanted to have this conversation with Luke, but he had delayed it for some time.

First, because he wanted to give the benefit of the doubt to Luke. Maybe he was just very good at his job, and Christian hadn't spotted him. But several times he had called Luke when he knew for a fact that Ana was out in the open, and Luke answered, everything in his voice saying that he wasn't on duty. There was also the fact that Luke never asked Christian if Ana was seeing someone in the building, beside Katherine. Ana came to see Christian at least two nights a week, and Christian never spotted Luke near the building. If it had been him tailing the girl, he would have found it weird that his boss's daughter came so often to see her best friend, when that said-best-friend married barely a few months ago. Sure there was also Kaelie, but Kaelie was a student who didn't have much time, or much will, to socialise during school terms.

Sure, he was not going to lie, Luke slacking at his job gave him the possibility to see Ana more often, without having to give any justifications; but the point remained. No matter how much he understood the girl's point-of-view and her want for freedom, Raymond had too many enemies to let her roam without protection. And Luke did not deliver on the protection part.

Luke sighed, apparently relieved that Christian was not going all rampage on him for a file that he had to assemble last minute, "Man. She's just a girl who wants to experience life. She shops, she eats in fancy restaurants, and once in a while, she goes to some fancy bar. So yeah, I cut her some slacks. Her Dad doesn't need to know if she was grinding a guy to the music, or what she had for dessert."

"Are you dense?" Christian asked, not believing his ears.

"What?"

"Don't you realise that Raymond is the most powerful man in the city? Even worldwide, he has his weight in the balance of power. He has enemies in almost every country there is. He has so many businesses, that you can't really make him run for his money. He is a proud man, and he already accomplished what he wanted in life, so death isn't something he fears. As an enemy, only his daughter has value, because Raymond would give anything to keep his daughter safe. Don't you understand that?"

"I do. And honestly, she is on my radar. Her phone GPS is always on, and I put a code in my system to have her face recognised on city cameras as soon as she's out. But … honestly, I think that she appreciates the —"

"It is not your job to make sure she appreciates anything," Christian harshly cut him off, though he did not raise his voice. In truth, Christian never had to raise his voice while working. Ana was the only one who ever got to see this side of him

"You are not her father. You are not her friend. You are not her husband. You are on a _paycheque._ You are an employee who has to answer to his boss. And Raymond told you to be her shadow. He doesn't do it to stalk her, he does it to protect her. What good will that give you if she's attacked and you only have her location? Do you think that Raymond will let it slide if she's hurt while you are supposed to be her fucking shadow?"

Luke looked down, and Christian deeply inhaled through his nose, hoping that this reminder would be the only one needed. But then, he heard Luke mutter under his breath, "It's boring, really."

"I don't care. If Raymond pays you to watch begonias bloom, you do it. You don't get to make judgement calls. If you want to make those, you chose the wrong line of work, and the door is this way," Christian said, pointing the exit with his finger.

He knew it was vicious of him to propose to Luke to quit his job since they all knew that there was only one way to quit this particular line of work, but he still did it. And given the way Luke stubbornly remained where he was, he did not want to go either. With a small sigh, Christian got up, wondering if this day (or even this week) would ever end, and he said,

"I put my neck out for you Luke. I told Raymond that _you_ were perfect for the job. Don't make me a liar. And don't make me repeat myself. Because next time, I won't be this nice and patient. Next time better never exist."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

After setting things straight with Luke, Christian got home and prepared his bag for the upcoming week before driving to the Steele mansion and easily sneaking in, like he did so many times before. But instead of going to Ana's room, like he usually did, he went where he had never been before, to Raymond's room. As expected, the room was large, though refined. Without prying, Christian looked around, seeing that after all these years, Raymond still didn't mourn his wife. The closet doors were slightly ajar, revealing women's clothes and shoes while Christian could see on the vanity that Raymond had kept all his wife's toiletries.

In silence, he went to sit on the armchair by the window, his eyes going to the picture of Raymond and his complete family that was on the nightstand. Raymond was supposed to come back from Vegas in the middle of the night, and Christian had some questions for him that could not wait for his return from Moscow. He checked his phone to estimate how long it would take Raymond to be home and saw that he received a text from Ana.

**I'm sorry I went behind your back. I should have told you beforehand that I was meeting your parents. I just wanted to help you. Ana.**

And finally, Christian let out a small, but true genuine smile. She had sent him several texts throughout the day and tried to call a couple of times, but Christian didn't want a repeat of the previous night, especially over the phone, so he ignored her. There was also the fact that he felt that she did not understand why he was angry at her. It wasn't much that she tried to reunite him with his parents, but the way she did it. And finally, that last text proved that she understood what went wrong.

A part of Christian understood why she did it. She was loved as a child, and her father made sure that she was aware of that, he gave her a golden childhood. Even Jose with his shitty childhood had some troubles understanding why Christian was so uninterested in his parents. He had tried a couple of times to get Christian to look for his parents, but Christian simply didn't care. He didn't look back on his past. But he could understand why people who were loved as children did, and would want him to make contact with his parents.

So it was really the fact that she tricked him to see his parents that set Christian's nerves on fire. And now, all he could hope for was that his parents were not going to put pressure on Ana so she could arrange another meeting.

**I'm going to Moscow tomorrow morning. For a week. Christian **

He felt that he ought to warn her, so she would at least stop trying to call him. Her response was immediate.

**Last time you went to Russia, it didn't end well. And now you're going while we're in the middle of a fight. Please don't go. Ana **

**It's business. I'll be back. We'll talk then. Christian **

**Can't I come tonight? Like that we can talk now. Ana **

Even though Raymond's bedroom was at the opposite side of Ana's, not even on the same floor, Christian could picture and hear her getting up in her bed, rushing to her closet to quickly throw something on and rush out of her mansion. Which would be ironic. She would be at his place, while he was at her place …

**No. I have some stuff to do before leaving. I can't take care of this, now. Christian **

**Please, Christian. I don't want you to leave angry with me. Ana **

Though she did not say it, Christian read between the lines. she was persuaded he was going to die, and their last conversation would be one of anger. He rolled his eyes, checking the time before he typed his answer.

**I'm not going to die. And I am not home, anyway. Like I said, I have some stuff I need to take care of, before leaving. We'll talk when I'll get back. Christian **

She did not respond to that, and Christian wondered if it was because she was hurt by his refusal to talk, or if it was because she understood that there was no argument to make.

Half an hour passed when Raymond finally entered his room. As soon as he opened the door, Christian, who had remained in the dark for the most part of the night, switched on the small lamp, making Raymond jump on his feet, taking his gun out and aiming at Christian's head.

It took him a couple of seconds to recognise Christian and lower his weapon. "Jesus, Christian! Do you want to die?"

"I need to talk to you," Christian announced unceremoniously. Raymond looked at him, slightly surprised by his tone, as much as by his presence, before he tiredly said,

"Can't it wait tomorrow?"

"I'm taking the 6:15 to Moscow, so no. Now is the best time.'

Raymond slightly furrowed his brows at the mention of Moscow. In an unexpected turn of event, the death of Andrew had a really big impact on the Bratva. It turned out that he was their number one supplier when it came to girls, and so, when he died, they lost their main product, meaning they lost their main revenue. And though Raymond cared very little for Russia and its mafia, Christian thought that it was the right moment to strike them down. He wasn't much doing it for Idris, but for the Yakuza, reinforcing their alliance by doing so.

"I have a question for you," Christian said, looking deep into the dark eyes of his boos. And for a moment, it seemed that the roles were reversed and that he was the one in charge instead of Raymond.

"Did you know about my parents?"

"I did."

"For how long?"

Christian saw curiosity in Raymond's eyes, probably because he had always refused any pieces of information about his parents, and that now he was coming in his room, in the middle of the night to ask about them

"The day after I learnt your name. Eric did some research, and filled me in."

Christian frowned, not understanding Raymond next move. This wasn't logical. "So why did you keep me in your ranks? Why did you raise me to be second in command? A kid with parents who are in the deep with the feds is bound to bring troubles."

"Because when I asked you, you said you don't look in the past. I proposed you to look for your parents, and you refused. Your parents were dead to you, and that was good enough for me. I took a calculated risk on you, and it paid off. You're the most loyal man I know, you always put the interest of Idris first, you know how to make her thrive. I don't regret my decision."

Christian nodded, wondering if he would have taken the same risk if he had been in Raymond's position. But suddenly, a part of Raymond's speech came back to him. _'A calculated risk_'. He recalled Eric's last words, saying that Raymond did not act rationally when he took him in, and he started connecting the dates. He was enrolled maybe a few weeks after Michael's 'disappearance'. So maybe Raymond thought that it was a risk worth it, but it wasn't an all calculated risk. There was a part of him that acted out of instincts, … or guilt.

"Do you realise that this is the first time that you acknowledged out loud that you are my second in command?" Christian rose an eyebrow, not sure to understand where Raymond was getting, and the older knowingly smiled. "Usually you refer to yourself as 'the muscles', or 'the guard dog'."

"I guess I came to term with it," Christian mumbled, though he knew exactly what had changed. When he had his discussion with Jason Taylor, he had only been thinking about him and Ana. He didn't do it for Raymond, he did it for himself. And he did it by himself. It gave him a new sensation of power, and a new way to see Raymond. He still deeply respected the man, but he was now more seeing him as an equal.

"How did you find out? I doubt you're the one who looked for them," Raymond inquired, apparently still curious about Christian's parents.

"I certainly did not look for them. I … That FBI guy played me well. And by a turn of event, I was brought to face them," Christian shrugged, being vague on purpose. Though Ana wanted to keep their relationship a secret from her father, Christian had always made a point to never lie to Raymond. And if his boss were to ever outright ask the fateful question, Christian knew he would tell the truth, no matter of Ana's wishes.

"You know that it wasn't their fault, then," Raymond said, pushing toward a conversation that Christian would have gladly passed on.

"Honestly, I don't care. I don't care about the reason or their excuse. One little line on a piece of paper isn't going to change anything."

Raymond looked at Christian with surprise, as if he had expected Christian to try to tie new bounds with his family, and so Christian reminded Raymond of something crucial, "Just by curiosity, what is your motto in life?"

"Family is everything … But Christian, they are your family."

"Are you defending them? Are you telling me that you would have done the same thing with your kids?" Christian mused, having a hard time believing that Raymond Steele would have agreed to something as preposterous as leaving his children, even for one hour.

"Would you?" Raymond asked, curious about Christian's answer.

"Of course, not. I would never let go of my kid."

"Even if it's what's best for your child?"

"What's best for my kid is for me to remove the threat from his life. No matter the cost, I will remove any threats coming at my kid," Christian declared, suddenly understanding Raymond's overprotectiveness for his daughter. So far, he only ever took it as work rubbing in his personal life. But now that he was thinking about it, it was simply a parent protecting his child. It seemed unreasonable because Raymond's death and power were oversized.

"And if I were to be the threat? Would you 'remove' me?" Raymond asked, making Christian snap his head to him. He deeply looked into his boss's eyes, before he got up, his eyes still in Raymond's, and he deploys wished his next words,

"I would remove you without a single hesitation."

"Well, I will sleep with only one eye open, when you will have kids. Until then, I am going to catch up on my beauty sleep."

Christian took it as his cue to leave, but as he walked back to his car, he couldn't help but feel that Raymond's last question had been a test to see if he would be a fit parent.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**💚So, I know, you all thought that Raymond had something to do with Christian's parents, but no. It was … too obvious. I don't know. I felt like it was giving too much importance to a trope that doesn't belong to the main story. Sure it is needed to explain Christian's character, but we don't need all the drama that it would have brought if Raymond had something to do with this.**

💚 **ALSO, guys, there is a small red flag in the conversation between Christian and Raymond! Anyone who can tell me what it is gets a sneak peak on the Daddy's next chapter ...**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** What did you think of the moment between Jason and Christian? And What do you think of Christian, now that he went after a little girl to get what he wanted?**

**💚 How about the tiny bit of moment with our couple?**

**💚 How do you feel about Christian final words to Raymond?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

💚**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	46. Chapter 45: Girls Night

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 45****: Girls Night(4,8K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️ **

**💚 So, apparently, Christian can do no wrong in your eyes… it is interesting to know …**

💚** OMG! An early update! And a long one! What is happening!? Hope you will like it**

**💚 For those who are interested, the red flag that I mentioned on the previous chapter was the fact that Christian clearly said that, would Raymond ask the right question, he would not hesitate to tell him the truth. Therefore, he would put Raymond before Ana, which if you remember, is something that Ana is afraid about … **

**💚 Also, I don't want you guys to read too much into Raymond's conversation about children. Remember that he sees Christian as a second son, so yes, he's going to ask the question about his children, not as Ana's father, but as Christian's. He is curious to know what kind of life Christian will lead once he will have children, that's it.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Mia's PoV **

**I demand actual proof that you have a cat! When you come back, I want a picture! Mia **

With a small shake of her head, Mia put the phone on the counter and tried once again to at least get a glimpse of the infamous Bastille. She couldn't believe that it had been more than six months since she became his official nanny when Christian was away on business trips and that she still did not see actual proof of the cat's existence.

Sure both water and food were gone when she came by (and she actually was grateful that Christian had vegan cat food in his cupboards for when she would be the one to feed his pet), but that was it. She still had not seen the cat. She didn't even know what colour he was. And she wasn't delusional enough to think of at least finding a cat hair here and there. Christian was a cleaning freak. She had never seen a place look so clean, except in commercials. Maybe he was the hidden son of Mr Clean, who knew?

As she kept her silent hunt, Mia glanced at the stairs, wondering if the cat hid there when she came, knowing that she never went upstairs. Though Christian never explicitly forbade her any place in his apartment, Mia still felt that going upstairs would be an invasion of his privacy. Probably because the rare times Christian invited her over for dinner, he never really gave her a tour. Upstairs were his private quarters, and she respected that, not the little bit curious of what she may, or may not find there.

Christian had left three days ago, and so Mia had tried a different tactic to try and see the cat. She couldn't really tell why she was so obsessed on seeing Bastille with her own eyes. A part of her felt that it was because it seemed so strange for a man of Christian's stature and presence to have a _cat_ for a pet. She often teased him, saying that Bastille was probably some fat grey cat that he petted while he plotted against his enemy like it was often seen in movies and cartoons. Which often made Christian laugh.

She was persuaded that he actually enjoyed this little game his cat was playing with her. But until she would see what kind of cat Christian Grey had, she would not stop bugging him. Though she doubted that Christian himself got the cat. Weirdly enough, the cat appeared around Christmas time, and though he never confirmed it, Mia was sure that Bastille had been a present from Christian's unknown girlfriend. What made her sure of it was the fact that Christian never denied it, and since she knew that he didn't lie to her, it meant that she was right. Which she made a big deal about. She went on and on telling him how big step it was in a relationship to have a pet together, and he went on, ignoring everything she had to say. Probably because he was not ready for that sort of commitment, when his girlfriend, obviously was.

Suddenly, her phone insulted her with Jensen Ackles' voice, treating her of '_Son Of Bitch_', and indicating her that she received a text message. She took it, seeing with no surprise that it was Christian taunting her and her inability to see his cat.

**Maybe he simply doesn't like you. I'm sure he heard you not being a preachy vegan, pain in the ass. So now, he's afraid that you're not really committed to the cause, and you'll relapse when he's around. Self-preservation, I'm telling you. Christian **

**My bad. Had I known, I would have been bitchy about food and ethics. Really, where can he hide? It's not like you live in a freaking palace! Mia **

**Isn't it a bit late for you to drop by, anyway? Didn't you say that you usually come around eight? Christian **

**Whoa, Big Brother! Calm down. Gee. I'm going out tonight. So I decided to try and catch your cat out of the schedule. Might I say that I miserably failed? Mia **

**You? Going out? XD Christian **

😒** It's not funny, Christian. I contrarily to some people I know, happen to have friends. Mia **

**I have friends. Christian **

**Jose doesn't count. The bromance that you guys have is too real for you to call him 'friend'. Mia **

From the first time she had seen them together, rescuing her in that hotel room, Mia had been sure of one thing, Jose and Christian were brothers. Sure they had no blood tying them together, but they were the people on which they relied the most. When he came to help her in that hotel room, with that Senator laying on the floor, bleeding his life away, Christian did not call his boss, he called Jose. And Mia was sure that it was because Christian knew Jose would help him, no matter the decision he would take.

**So, you're not my friend? Christian **

This simple little question made Mia smile. Though Christian quickly became a friend, her best friend even, in her eyes, it was still nice that he acknowledged it. still, she did not go melodramatic over it, because it was not Christian's scene, and not really hers either.

**I don't know. I mean, since your cat is snubbing me, I have to assume that it's because you taught him to do it. Mia **

**Haha. Totally. I told him to beware of females. You are one dangerous species. Christian **

**Troubles in paradise? Mia **

**No. It's just a general truth. And us, males, have to look out for each other. Christian **

Though everything seemed normal about their conversation, Mia didn't believe Christian when he said that everything was going all right in his couple. She couldn't tell what exactly made her think there was trouble in paradise, but she felt that there was something off with Christian, lately. Maybe it was because he texted her that he was leaving, instead of coming to see her, as he usually did.

The thing was, Mia knew that she read Christian better than most people. She was not vain enough to presume that she could see through him. She was sure that Jose or Raymond could do a better job at that, having known him longer. Or even his girlfriend, seeing him in a way nobody else did. But she knew she could read him well enough, Christian himself had told her so.

So she had the feeling that Christian had avoided her on purpose, and usually, when he avoided her, it was because something happened with his girlfriend, and he didn't want her to pry it out of him. More than once, Christian had told her that she had very good instincts, and Mia knew that Christian prefered keeping her instincts away from him when he didn't feel like he could elude her.

**Anyway, I have to go. Like I said, I'm going clubbing tonight. Just send some positive vibes to your cat, so tomorrow I can finally see his cute little face. Mia **

On those words, Mia got off the couch, but just as she was about to leave, her phone sang '_Carry On My Wayward, Son_", making her think that she should quit her obsession with this show. Not that she really wanted to. She picked, surprised that Christian called, instead of keeping their conversation textual, and she didn't even have time to say hello, that he was already asking her,

"The club you're going to, is it Pandemonium?"

"How do you even know that?! You should really turn down that Big Brother thing!" Mia exclaimed, a part of her hoping that Christian was not crazy enough to stalk her like that. Sure it was nice to have someone worry about you, no matter where they were in the world, but that was pushing it a bit too far.

She heard him chuckle a little, before he clarified, "I just put two and two together, Mia. I don't work for the government, might I remind you. Katherine owns the club, and since she and her best friend are your closest friends, I did the math."

"Well, technically, _you_'re my closest friend."

There was a small silence, but she didn't take it personally. She knew that Christian wasn't a man who liked to show or display his emotions, and she knew that if he didn't retort anything, it was because he simply accepted her friendship as it was. Nothing more.

He cleared a little his throat and insisted, "Well, is this the place you're going?"

"Yes. Why?"

The hesitation barely lasted a second, but Mia heard it, nonetheless, letting her know that Christian was not a fan of her going to that particular club. "I should have signed you up for self-defence classes."

She refrained herself from laughing locking the door of his flat behind her as she told him, "Christian … I know that guys are a bit 'pervy-touchy' at clubs, but it's okay. I can handle a loser or two coming my way."

"Pandemonium is a club who has a high clientele. The kind of clientele where you might recognise a few of your formers 'clients'. And since you are just a girl outside the bond of a contract, nothing stops them from doing what they want to you, if they recognise you. Especially not a simple no."

This made Mia freeze in front of the lift for a second. She didn't think of that, and she didn't want to have to deal with that kind of thing right now. She just wanted to spend some time with her girlfriends. Maybe Christian was right, and she should have taken some self-defence classes. But then again, the chances of that happening were really thin.

"Well, I will have to take my chances, then," She said with a tone she hoped to be brave. She knew that Christian would never go as far as to forbid her to go anywhere, but she didn't want him to worry if there was nothing to worry about.

"Just stay close to Ana, and troubles shouldn't find you," Christian said, his voice sounding a bit further than before. Mia couldn't tell if it was her imagination or the truth, but she was under the impression that he had put her on speaker so he could text.

"You're paranoid, you know that? everything will be fine. And seriously, Christian? Ana? Even I can take her on! She's so _tiny_."

"Just humour me."

Mia rolled her eyes but agreed. It wasn't like she had planned to ditch the girls anyway. She was on the Kavanagh floor when he asked,

"Can I ask you for another favour?"

"You owe me so many favours, that I feel I can ask for a dragon for Christmas," She joked, earning a chuckle from Christian.

"Where would you even put a dragon? Just keep an eye open tonight. If there is a shady guy lurking around, send me a text."

Mia rolled her eyes once again, wondering what would Christian do if indeed there was a shady guy lurking around, he was across the planet. still, she wasn't naive enough to not know what kind of business could have lead to Christian being worried someone could follow those he cared about, and she didn't hesitate to call him on that, with a playful tone,

"Have you been playing with the wrong crowd?"

Even though she couldn't see him, she could swear that he just smirked. She could actually hear it in his voice, "Let's just say that I am making sure I have been heard properly."

She knocked at Kate's door while letting Christian know as Elliott and Ana opened the door, "I'll do it, but I want my dragon. You know what, I'll consider the debt erased when I will get to see Bastille. So you better catch the invisible cat, Christian, because I will collect bright and early."

Then she hung up, before hugging both Elliott and Ana. Though she wouldn't go as far as calling Elliott her friend, she enjoyed spending time with her. He was still a student, which meant that he understood her in ways others couldn't. often, he would offer her a ride to the University, since they had the same one, even though they were not in the same field; and once in a while, they would have lunch together. She had to admit, that at first, she felt weird because she was scared that Kate would get the wrong idea, but Kate assured her that she didn't mind. She knew that Elliott loved her and wouldn't ever do that to her, and she hoped the same went for Mia.

"So? Still having problems with Christian's cat?" Elliott asked. Mocking her and her inability to see a simple kitten. Mia grunted, sitting on the sofa where she was joined by Ana.

"I swear, it's like he hates me already. Can't you give me some cat weed so I can coax him?"

"Once again, it's _grass_ not weed," Elliott professionally said, shaking his head a little. If Mia had one thing she could say about Elliott, he never knew when someone was joking. This was not the first time, and she doubted it would be the last time he would understand the joke, minutes after, which did not fail.

"Oh…" He miserably said, making Ana snicker at him. "Oh, shut up, Steele. At least I know that weed isn't just some … how did you say it? 'Bad grass'?"

"I was nine!"

"You were twelve! And we were watching CSI. How could you think that grass had any place in a CSI episode?" Elliott accused, and Mia nodded, agreeing with Elliott. From a certain age and on, there was no such thing as naivety when it came to watching a CSI episode. People weren't sleeping in ketchup, weed was not bad grass, and bad guys did not always have a black hat.

"_Anyway_," Ana snapped, clearly not happy to relieve that memory. "We were talking about the best honeymoon place for Elliott and Miss I-take-forever-to-put-false-lashes-on. Help me convince Elliott that Israel isn't the best place."

Mia frowned a little because she certainly wouldn't mind going to Israel. "I don't know. The pictures I've seen of Tel-Aviv are pretty nice. I always pictured Kate more of a beach honeymoon person."

"Yeah, but Elliott wants to go there so they can go to the temple and all. Really, who wants to spend their honeymoon doing religious stuff? I mean, I'm telling you, Elliott, I shopped with that girl, and what she has planned for her honeymoon is anything but holly."

Ana wiggled her eyebrows at Elliott, who rolled his eyes. Throughout the months, Mia had come to notice that when it came to sex jokes and references, Ana was the crude one, or the one stereotypes would classify as the 'dude'. Elliott was more reserved, and Kate more subtle, though almost as restless as her best friend.

And this was probably why she liked Ana the most out of the three. After their second outing, Ana confessed that she had some idea of where she came from, and she apologised if sometimes her jokes didn't land well with Mia, but Mia liked the rawness that came out of the brunette. She didn't censor herself because of something that _might_ upset her and just went with the flow.

"Personally, I think you should go to London. Kate has been dying to do the harry potter studios, and —"

"There is no beach in London, Ana," Elliott cut her off, talking to her as if she was slow minded and making her childishly mimics him before sticking her tongue out.

Kate finally came into the living room, ready and dazzling, and she cut the conversation short, "You really suck at organising things in secrets, my friends. personally, I think we should go to Tel-Aviv for a couple of days, before drifting to New-Caledonia."

Kate hugged Mia, and the three girls walked to the door as the married woman told her husband, "Don't wait up, it's a girls night."

On the way down, they admired each other's outfits and makeup, taking a few pictures along the way, and once in the lobby, they met with Madame Dorothea who joked about them being able to storm the world, Charlie's Angels style. Then, in the limousine, they took a few other pictures, opening a bottle of champagne.

They arrived at the club and went straight to a VIP booth to finish their champagne, talking about the advantages of owning a club among other various things. They went dancing for a while before one by one returning to the booth where a new bottle of cold champagne was waiting for them.

"We should find you a guy to go home with tonight," Kate said to Mia as her blue eyes were already scanning the crowd for a potential partner.

"Hey! I am not the only single woman in this room," She complained, pointing Ana with her hand.

She knew that Kate didn't mean bad, and she herself said several times that she envied the relationship Kate had with her childhood sweetheart. But she knew that she wasn't really looking to have one by her own. For the moment, she wanted to achieve her dream, which was to become a lawyer. Her first year was coming to an end, and perfectly, and she didn't want some relationship with some guy to put that in peril. And there was also the fact that he felt that she was a bit off in that department. The last person she found rather attracted to, ended up being gay.

"True!" Kate lured, looking at Ana in a way that told Mia that there were things she didn't know about. Ana immediately recoiled, and snapped,

"It's not because I don't have some fancy ring on my finger, showing off to the world, that it means that I'm single."

"You have a boyfriend?!" Mia mused, before her brain, started to figure out who it could be. "Oh, please tell me it's not Paul! He's so …"

"Dull?" Kate finished for her, and Mia nodded her agreement. Sure Paul was nice, and very passionate when it came to his career, but personality-wise it seemed that he had nothing on him.

Ana rolled her eyes, before looking at the crowd and cursing Mia, "You've jinxed us! Look who's coming our way!"

Mia followed Ana's gaze, seeing Paul coming their way, happily waving, but her attention was retained by some guy who was standing by the bar. She squinted her eyes, wondering if this was the shady guy Christian had mentioned since she was sure that the guy did not dance or talk to anyone. That, plus the fact that, though he wasn't looking at them right now, she had been feeling his gaze for a while.

Paul asked for a dance with Ana, which, given the way she was helplessly looking at her friends, she was not eager to give, but Kate pushed her friend in Paul's arms and told them to have fun. Once it was only Mia and Kate, the blonde stated the obvious,

"I don't think she wanted to go."

"I know, but she needs to have some fun. She had this huge fight with her boyfriend, and she needs to see that she has other options," Kate said, before opening wide her eyes, and pretending like she did not just say that Ana had a boyfriend.

She turned her head to Mia, in the vain hope that she had not been listening, but when she saw that the blonde was all ears, she told her, "Please don't ask any questions. I'm not even supposed to have told you that!"

"Is Ana in some kind of Romeo and Juliet affair? Is she dating the son of a rival company?" Mia asked, with too much liveliness. The buzz of the alcohol was starting to get to her head.

Kate refused to talk, and she started crossing over who Ana could be seeing. She wondered if she was seeing an enemy of Robinson Inc', or an enemy of the mobster Raymond? The biggest enemy that Raymond had in town were the Mazerati, and Mia started this whole fantasy where Ana and the eldest son were in a torrid affair that would lead to a pregnancy and to the two families merging in the end. None of that dying and being star-crossed lovers bullshit. She liked Ana too much for her to die like that.

Ana came back from her dance with Paul, not without shooting daggers at Kate, and as soon as she was seated, a glass of champagne in her hand, Mia asked, "I heard you have a boyfriend."

Ana glared at her best friend, and Mia pound, as she swore, "I won't say a word! I promise! I'm very good at keeping secrets about secret lovers!"

And as she said the words, a wild idea flashed through Mia's mind. What if Ana was Christian's secret girlfriend and Christian Ana's secret boyfriend? She opened her mouth and eyes wide, looking at Ana before realisation dawned her. It couldn't be, the alcohol was definitely getting to her head. She doubted that Ana could keep such a big secret (she was talking about Christian earlier, and Ana didn't even react), and the rare times she had seen Christian in the same room as Ana, he had been completely indifferent to her.

Ana took a long inspiration, before she told Mia, "His name is Tristan, and I don't want my Dad to find out about him. He is very … unconventional."

"Is he married?"

"No! He's just not the type of guy you see at every corner."

Mia nodded, understanding that Ana didn't want her father to know. She had done some research on her future boss, and given how ruthless he was in the few articles she found about him, she could imagine that it would be much worst to anyone who would dare court his precious little girl. Especially since getting Ana also meant getting a foot into the mafia, if not two.

"So, what was your fight about?"

Once again, Ana glared at Kate who did not seem bashful the least in the world. "Something stupid I did."

"Tristan lost sight of his parents when he was young, and when Ana tried to reunite them and give Tristan his family back, the asshole got mad at her. And he barely gave her any sign of life since. He is one text away from ghosting her," Kate intervened, clearly more mad at Tristan than Ana was.

"Well, he is _working_," Ana said in the defence of her boyfriend.

"I don't care! You tried to do something nice for him, and he screamed at you. I do not approve of that kind of behaviour. You shouldn't be with someone who made you cry yourself to sleep five nights in a row."

"Well … I kind of understand Tristan," Mia said, earning a powerful glare from Kate, and so she explained, "Neither of you can understand. Your parents love you.

Personally, my parents didn't. I left home when I was fourteen, and I ended up … having to do things I'm not proud of to survive. My Dad was a passive drunk who would have rather not have kids, and since he was twice the size of my Mom, she let her frustration of being with a drunk on us, the kids.

So yeah, I wouldn't like someone to reunite me with them. Especially if that someone is my lover, who is supposed to know better."

This seemed to calm Kate a little, making her see things with a different point-of-view. Mia understood it was hard for someone who had been loved all their lives to even comprehend that some people don't have that chance, and would rather forget about the part of their lives when they felt so unloved.

"And anyway, it is not _Kate's_ problem. It's not even why he's mad," Ana said, to close the matter, which only made Kate roll her eyes as if Ana had said something stupid.

"I'm just saying that you forgave much worse than putting together a meeting behind his back. And you didn't take a whole week to forgive him, either. Maybe you should remind him of that. You should remind him that we don't push away the people we love."

Mia didn't say anything, seeing that Kate went with another topic that she knew nothing about. She wondered if Tristan maybe cheated on Ana for her to forgive 'much worse' to him. But it didn't seem to fit with the character. Apparently, Tristan was mad that Ana went behind his back, so she doubted he would betray her in the first place.

Ana responded something about Kate being out of line, and Mia dug out her phone, knowing that she would be no help to the two girls. They went to a territory where she would only be a spectator, and so she decided to report to Christian about the shady guy who was still looking in their direction.

**So, maybe you are not that paranoid. There is a shady guy at the club who keeps looking at us. Mia **

Christian's answer was immediate, and Mia said that she would use the restroom while the two other girls kept on arguing.

**Big blue eyes? Unruly hair? Grey streak in the middle? 5"8? Christian **

**Dude, how come you don't know by now that I suck at description? He's a shady guy with weasel eyes. Mia **

When she was done in the bathroom, she checked her phone and saw that Christian sent her a picture, with many texts with interrogation marks. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head a little, and tried to take a picture of the guy, without being noticed, which was why she pretended to take a selfie, focusing on the guy instead of her face.

She walked back to the booth, asking herself what good will it do to Christian to know if some shady guy was here or not. He didn't seem dangerous, and Christian was miles away, unable to help them, anyway. Her phone buzzed in her hand, and she smiled.

**Weasel eyes? Haha. That's just Luke. He's okay. He's tailing Ana. Christian. **

**Of course, he is. Mia. **

She felt bad for her friend, having to endure bodyguards everywhere she went, and suddenly understood what Christian meant when he said that nothing would happen to her as long as she stayed near Ana. If she had someone shadowing her, he would prevent any threats coming her way, no matter to whom that threat was meant to.

As she sat in the booth, she saw the girls were still arguing, and so she physically put herself in the middle and ordered, "Stop! We're not here to bicker about guys. We're here to have a fun night between girls."

The two girls pouted a little, before agreeing, and after they ordered a third bottle of champagne, they went back to the dance floor where they danced all night long.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Two days later**

**Christian is still in Russia for two other days**

**To Christian****: Theresa Wilks died yesterday morning. Her funeral is due tomorrow, in the morning. Jose **

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So we got Mia's point-of-view, and NO, this isn't a filler chapter. It is a very important chapter because it shows the relationship Mia has both with Christian and with the girls. She is completely free and honest with Christian, while she is more reserved with the girls. It is something that you have to keep in mind for further chapters, because like I said several times before, Mia is an important character, and her point-of-view build her through the story, so … yup **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** So I know, many of you aren't in accord with Kate, but .. What do you think about her?**

**💚 How about the relationship between Mia and Christian?**

**💚 How do think Ana feels about Christian calling Mia and not her?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**💚

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	47. Chapter 46: Bonding Over Tears

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 46****: Bonding Over Tears (3,0K)**

**💚So, in case you missed it, Kate referred to the time Ana forgave Christian for killing Lincoln. And sure, he was under an order, but Ana doesn't know that. So yes, Kate feels that it was a big deal for her to forgive this and that Christian is being a d-bag for holding the grudge.**

**💚Also, yes, I know that Theresa had never been mentioned by name, but she isn't such an important character, which is why I did not bother. And since we know since chapter one that Carla's maiden name is Wilks, I just figured that you would put two and two together. It wasn't really a riddle or anything. **

**💚Also, also I wonder if anyone picked up on the fact that Mia thinks that Christian is the one reluctant to make a commitment in his relationship?**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

When Christian got to the Steele mansion, it was already the middle of the night, and the house was dark and silent. No matter how fast he had arranged for his transportation back to New York, this was the earliest he could arrive. Thankfully, he had already finished all he had to do back in Moscow and just needed to find a way to apologise to his Japanese counterpart to leave him without properly saying goodbye.

Silently, he made his way to Ana's room and crept inside, and he was barely surprised to hear her sob. She didn't take well her grandfather's death, Christian doubted that it would go any different with her grandmother's. After closing the door, he walked to her bed where Ana moved a little so she could see who just came into her bedroom.

When their eyes met, tears welled up in hers before she put back her head on her pillow, bringing her knees to her stomach as she sobbed, "if you came to break up with me, can you just postpone it? I can't deal with much more loss today."

Christian walked the few steps separating him from her bed, and knelt, removing the hair that stuck on her face as he looked at her with compassion. "Babe …" He started, before stopping himself, at a loss of words. She hiccuped, her sobs more violent, and so he said the only thing that came to mind in such situations, "I am so sorry."

As soon as the words left his mouth, she burst into uncontrollable weeps. Christian moved so he was laying against her, over the covers and holding her in his arms. It seemed that she was even more devastated than when her grandfather passed away a few months ago.

For the longest time, she silently cried in his arms, her tears intensifying, even more, every time it seemed that she had some control over them, and Christian simply held her in his arms, caressing her hair. He did not tell her anything, sure that words were not what she needed nor wanted at the moment; and little by little, the minutes turned into more than an hour of cries.

Finally, she calmed down, hiccuping a little, and Christian tightened a little his hold on her as his mind started to wonder if he would ever feel that sense of loss. He wondered if he would be devastated like her if he had been raised by Grace and Carrick, having the normal apple pie life. But then he quickly dismissed the thought, he knew that even before they bailed on him, he did not have any grandparents for him to mourn.

"You know," Ana's crooked voice suddenly said in a whisper. "The doctor said that she died of a broken heart. That she lost her will to live after Grandpa died."

Christian remained silent, not sure of what he could say that would appease the girl. Especially since he knew of one other person who had his heart broken after his spouse died. _Her father_, who only kept on living for his children. Ana snuggled against him and kept her tale,

"It's so sad. I mean, with Grandpa, we were expecting it. He hadn't been feeling well for months and his Parkinson had gotten worse. But Grams was in good health."

Her last words were barely understandable, mixing with a wail as new tears escaped from her eyes. Christian kissed her forehead, once again holding her close to him, and his whole body tensed when she said,

"I think I'm cursed." He tilted his head down, and though she did not look up to him, he calms rationalised her,

"People die all the time, Ana. Especially old people."

He saw her hesitate a little, before she sat up, making him do the same before he gently caressed her cheek. She kept her eyes down, and told him,

"You know, I don't remember much of Mom. I mean, I remember her laugh, and how Dad would always smile when he would see her. But … I don't remember her face. Even now, after Dad showed me pictures after you took me to that place in Ebisu, I don't remember her face. It's just a vague memory.

But what I do remember is our last moment together. I remember it so clearly. I was so hot and laying on my bed. I think I was sick. And Mom came to kiss me goodbye. I remember her red gown and her beautiful hair down. She looked like a princess. A princess without a face. And then, she kissed my hand and left a mark of red lipstick, telling me that by doing so, she was leaving a part of her with me.

Then, she left, telling me that she loved me, and I said it back. Those were the last words I told my Mom. That I loved her. And Mike. And Uncle Eic. And Grandpa. And now, Grams.

And I know I shouldn't complain because they left with my last words to them being words of love, not words of anger, but … It's like I'm seeking a reaper on the ones I love."

For a moment, Christian wasn't sure of what to say, because Ana was going towards a territory unknown to him. He was not a religious person, and even less a superstitious person. He could understand that some people were, but it wasn't him, or how he perceived the world. Ana was trying to lead him somewhere where reason had little to do with the order of things, and Christian knew he would never like such a place.

"Don't you tell your father that you love him?"

"It's different. Dad … Dad cannot die, he promised me."

Christian slightly frowned, a little bit surprised that Raymond would make such a promise to his daughter when he was playing with the Angel of Death on a daily basis. He knew that _he_ would never make such a foolish promise to Ana because it didn't depend on him, he could be killed at any moment, and that was without taking into accounts the small accidents of life. When he had promised her that he would be back from Russia, it was because he mostly went to settle down some paperwork and make some alliances.

Still, he didn't linger on that, and cupped Ana's face, making sure she looked at him, when he told her, "There is no curse, Ana. Life is just a bitch, and sometimes we take it a little too personally."

She didn't argue about that, but he could see on her features that she was not convinced by his words. Still, he understood why she still did not tell him consciously that she loved him. If she believed that she was cursed, Christian doubted that she would risk saying the words when he was travelling across the world half the time.

And as this realisation came down to him, another followed, he didn't care for the words. Even if she hadn't said it in her sleep, he knew that she loved him. He could _feel_ it. In the way she looked at him, in the way she touched him, in the way she cared about him. And if abstaining from saying the words was the way she felt safe, Christian was not going to push her against it. After all, what were words compared to actions and feelings?

With a small sigh, he moved Ana so she would be in his arms again, between his legs, and he hummed _Tears In Heaven_, rocking her back and forth. He felt a few warm tears on his forearms as he kept on singing of sorts, and when he was done, she looked up, her face puffy, her eyes red and swollen, and her nose bulgy. And no matter how grotesque she looked at this moment, Christian still thought that she was beautiful.

She sadly smiled, before leaning her head against his torso and hugging him as she said, "Thank you for being here."

"You know that I'll always be here for you, Ana."

He had expected her to nod, or to say something, but she remained silent, not even looking up, and breaking their embrace. So he lifted her head by the chin, forcing her to look at him, and he insisted,

"You do know that, right?"

Once again, she did not have the reaction he wanted, and simply shrugged, avoiding eye contact as she mumbled, "I don't know. You were so angry at me."

"I was," he conceded, and finally she looked up.

If his opinion was asked on the matter, Christian would have rather keep this conversation for another day and not talk about their spat on the same day Ana buried a loved one. But on the other hand, this conversation was long overdue, and he didn't like that their quarrel made Ana doubt his feelings or even his commitment for her.

"You have to understand, this is who I am. Betrayal is not something I can condone. Because of the way I work. Because of the way I survived in the streets. Because of who I am and how I am perceived in this world. Had someone else done what you did … I wouldn't have simply yelled at them and told them we would settle this later …"

Ana looked down, though Christian could not tell if it was because of embarrassment or because he was getting dangerously close to the invisible veil behind which was her father's criminal career.

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to give you your parents back, just like you did for me."

"I know, I get that," Christian calmly said because he knew she did not go behind his back for malicious reasons. "But I don't appreciate the way you did it, I told you before, and I'm telling you once again, _don't go behind my back_. If you want something, just tell me. I'm not a monster, I can be reasoned."

Of course, he kept for himself that she was one of the few people who could actually reason him. Maybe he was a monster to other people, after all.

"You would have refused to see them," Ana argued, sure of herself, making Christian wonder how she perceived him. Did she think of him as a person she could never be fully honest with, because he would never try to hear her out? Because it was anything but true. If anything, she was the only person in the world that could make him bend one way or another,

"You have no idea how much I'm willing to comply to simply put a smile on your face, babe."

She slightly blushed, looking down on her knees as she asked, "So? We're still together?"

"Yes." To be honest, the question should not even be in Christian's mind. They had a squabble, but it wasn't something that was breakup worthy. Of course, he knew that had Ana had demanded an answer the night of their fight, he would have broken up with her, just out of spite.

"And you're no longer mad at me?" She inquired, making Christian think about it. He knew that he was one to hold the grudge for as long as he would live, but in this case, the anger was simply gone,

"No."

"And you forgive me?"

"Do you promise to _never_ do that kind of thing again?"

"I do!" She promptly said, making Christian smile and lovingly kiss her forehead.

A small silence grew between them as they embraced one another, that Ana broke by asking, "So if I invite your parents over, you will hear them out?"

Christian repressed a grimace. In all honesty, even if he knew what happened, he wasn't really eager to meet them. He didn't care much for them, because they belonged to his past. He had buried them, and he was not fond of talking to 'ghosts'.

"I would, but it wouldn't change a thing for me."

"But, Christian —"

"Ana …" Christian stopped himself, wondering how he could make her understand why he was not head over heels about meeting them. "Would you even _consider_ ever leaving your child? In the care of total strangers, nonetheless?"

"No, of course, I wouldn't. But _they_ did not have a choice."

"Of course they had a choice. There is always a choice, they just chose wrong."

He glanced down when she did not retort anything and saw that this topic was making her sad. Which he could not understand. They weren't her parents, and it wasn't her life, so, "Why do you care so much?"

"Because you can still have a Mom, and you're _choosing_ not to. There is this luxury thrown your way, and you're turning your back on it. Your Mom was so sad at the restaurant. She was asking so many questions about you, about your life, about your hobbies, and you just refuse to be with her."

"You don't understand because you didn't live my life," Christian calmly said, stating the obvious. This was something they would never be in accord with because they had such different upbringings. For starters, Ana had one, when Christian had to make his own.

"I know. I know that you had a terrible life because of that decision your parents made so long ago. But … you don't understand either. You don't try to put yourself in anyone's shoes. Well, I do. I put myself in your mother's place, and it breaks my heart. I would be so devastated if I knew that my son wouldn't even want to speak to me. She's not asking for your fogginess, nor your blessing. She just wants to _talk to her son_. She wants the opportunity to at least once again, be a Mom to you. And you just deny her that simple thing."

When Ana finished her little speech, Christian didn't say a word as he let her words sink down. She was right, he rarely tried to put himself in the other's shoes and see things from their perspectives. Mostly because this was how he made himself an image. Trying to understand someone else was showing compassion, and, in his line of business, he would rather be feared than loved.

The only people he ever tried to see with their point-of-view were Ana and Mia. Ana for obvious reasons, and Mia because he felt that they had a rather similar start in life, with the only difference of her being a girl. Even with Jose, he never got the need see things his way because Jose was always rather raw the rare times he talked about his feelings.

"Not now," He finally gave in. "We will see and talk to them and whatever you want, but not now. I don't have the time or the patience to deal with them right now."

Ana's smile was reward enough, and she sat on her knees, taking his face in her delicate hands, "I truly am sorry to have handled things so poorly. I hope you can trust me again."

And that's when it hit him. That's when he understood what people said when they said that the heart overruled the brain sometimes. Though Ana had betrayed him, his trust wasn't shattered, not even chipped, he still trusted her. He knew that anyone else would have pulled that kind of thing on him, he would never trust them again.

"I trust you," He reassured her, and she paused a little, apparently taking his hesitation as proof of the contrary. He smiled, and clarified,

"Sure, I wouldn't put my life in your hands, but I trust you more than you know. You have no idea of what you mean to me."

And as he said those words, he kissed her with love. They shared an intense and passionate kiss, before Ana laid back, putting her head on Christian's chest, and forcing him to do the same, and she asked him, "Can you stay with me the whole night? Please?"

Christian didn't say a word, but removed his shoes and held her against him, though he barely slept that night, not really eager of Raymond finding about them by catching him in his daughter's bed.

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**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So I was curious, I have been experiencing first hand this whole 'one spouse dies of a broken heart when the other is already dead' a few times, and I was wondering if any of you witnessed that in their family, or friends as well? **

**💚And I know you wanted crazy makeup sex, but … the girl buried her grandma hours ago… I mean, who feels like being all sex when you're still grieving? But that doesn't mean you won't have sexy time anymore … **😏**(you pervs, haha)**

**💚And before you start jumping at my throat, Christian told Ana that he wouldn't put his life between her hands because he is a criminal, and Ana is a civilian. So if he has to rely on someone for backup, it will be at least someone who can hold a gun… **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** So what do you think of Ana?**

**💚 How about the convo between her and Christian?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	48. Chapter 47: That One Little Thing

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 47****: That One Little Thing (3,9K)**

💚** Guys, we are almost at 400 reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH. You have no idea how encouraging this is! Honestly, it is like fuel.**

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**Christian's PoV **

When Christian got back to his place from his trip to Detroit, it was the middle of the day, and he had to the nice surprise to find Ana in his apartment. He had planned to go to the headquarters after dropping his bag, but seeing her bent over the counter, completely oblivious of his arrival made him reconsider his plans. It had been a few weeks since their debate over his parents, and how he did not like the way she handled the whole affair, and everything had been going on fine since then.

Ana had been coming just as much as before, if not more often, and to his greatest surprise, Christian had been opening up more to her. It was never something voluntary, but more of him seeing something in a movie they'd watch together, and him telling her how he experienced the same thing. Or Ana talking about something that happened in her childhood, and him letting her know something that happened in his youth as well.

Even at work, things have been doing fine. The alliance Idris had made with the Yakuza had had the effect that Christian had wanted, calming down any enemies who would be bold enough to go against them. Even the Mazarati seemed to understand and finally stayed at their rightful place.

Without a sound, he tiptoed his way to his girlfriend, under the very curious eyes of Bastille and hoping that the cat would not betray him; and once he was behind her, he hugged her, kissing her neck with tenderness. She gasped a little, before letting out that sweet giggle that Christian loved so much, and he told her that phrase he knew she liked to hear,

"Honey, I'm home."

She craned her neck so she could kiss him, and Christian eagerly answered, bending her a little bit more so his hand could play with the hem of her skirt, all the way to her thighs. It had been a while since he had this thought in mind, but he was under the impression that Ana had put on a little weight compared to when he first saw her naked, lying beneath him. Not that he minded, far from it. Especially since it seemed that this weight had been mostly distributed to her ass and thighs.

Slowly, he let go of her lips, kissing the skin of her neck as one of his hands busied itself under her shirt while the other came dangerously close to her most intimate area. He glanced at her, watching her eyes close with pleasure, and when his fingers pushed her panties to the side, she let out a moan coming from the depth of her chest, before opening her eyes with urgency and pushing him away from her.

"_Nope_! No sex!"

"_What_? Why?!" He exclaimed, not really sure why she would refuse him anything bed related. Out of the two of them, Ana was definitely the one with the bigger sexual appetite, and she _loved_ having sex with him when he came back from a business trip.

For a second, he paused, trying to calculate the date to see if she was on her periods, but then he recalled that this 'moment of the month' had ended just a week before. So he watched Ana straighten herself, pulling her skirt down as she argued with reason,

"If you want birthday sex, we can't have back-home-sex today. My body isn't going to live through both."

The day after the morrow was his birthday, and Ana had been making a big deal about it for two whole weeks. In all honesty, he hadn't celebrated his birthday since he was twelve and did not care to celebrate it. To him, it was a day like any other. In truth, he was sure that no one actually knew the date of his birthday. No one but a certain person, of course. And now, Ana had taken out of him that his birthday was in the first week of September, and was completely outraged that he had made no plan to celebrate it.

Still, Ana's rationalisation and promises for mind-blowing sex did not stop Christian from pursuing what he had intended to do in the first place. He stalked his way to her, and once she was at arm's length, he caged her and kissed her sensitive spot between her collar and her jaw.

"I am not a monster, babe. I know how to play nice," He cooed her, his hand massaging her breast as his erection grew against her stomach.

"Maybe _you_ are not a monster, but there is one in your pants."

"He'll be gentle, and take you to Heaven," Christian charmed, lightly pinching her nipple, and he could feel that she was about to give in before she loudly breathed through her nose and walked to the other side of the counter.

"Let's be honest. I'm not like you. I don't control my libido like you can. If I give in, you'll be all nice, until you do that thing that gets me all flustered and mushy. And then, I'll ask for more, and then, in two days, I'll end up limping."

"What thing?" Christian asked with a smirk, retrieving from his attack, but not losing sight of what was important. Ana shook her head and turned to the fridge as she judiciously said,

"Like I'm going to tell you! I don't want you to use that kind of power over me. As long as I don't know your sex-trigger, you shall not know mine."

She waved her finger at him as if he was a child being scolded, and Christian couldn't help but smile. If she knew that his 'sex-trigger' was her mere presence, she would not be so smug about having one of her own. He had always found it funny that Ana was so persuaded that he was always in control of himself when he was with her when it was rather the contrary. Intimately or emotionally, Christian was well aware that Ana was the only person who ever managed to take him out of his comfort zone and make him feel emotions in their rawest forms.

"So, what are you doing here, if you didn't want to be eaten yet?" Christian asked, going to his couch where Bastille joined him and sat on his laps. The first time the cat watched him have sex with Ana, he had found it extremely weird. It seemed a bit voyeur of the cat. But Bastille never interrupted their special times, and always seemed to know that there was a certain amount of time to wait afterwards, before jumping in the bed.

Christian watched as Ana put a couple things in the fridge, admiring the view, and asserting to himself that she had definitely gained weight while she explained, "I didn't think you would be home so soon. I just wanted to put some things in your fridge, and then be in my very way."

"Are you going to make me a cake?" He teased because though Ana had started cooking, she was far from being a master chef.

"Nope. I ordered a small cake at the bakery. _Without sugar_. The girl looked at me as if I was crazy, but she said it would be done. But I'm still cooking the meal though."

Christian mindlessly petted Bastille while Ana was still going back and forth in the kitchen. He closed his eyes, as he let her know,

"I don't mind being your guinea-pig for bakeries."

"I do! I don't want you to be poisoned. That would be rather sad if your tombstone read your date of death as your day of birth, with written below, "_There lies Christian Grey poisoned by uneatable cakes_". Who would keep a straight face at that tomb?"

Christian let out a small chuckle, appreciating this simple moment he was having with his girlfriend. In truth, no matter how much he liked the sex, it was moments like that that he liked the most. Those moments that seemed so mundane, but that made him feel like his home wasn't simply a flat, but a whole. It was the fact that Ana was in the apartment, talking about ordinary things that made it a home. And Bastille heavily played a part in that as well.

"So, everything that has a red sticker on, you can't touch. If you do, I will be so pissed, that you will have to run for your life," Ana threatened, finally coming to sit down next to him, and though he knew that she had meant to be taken seriously, Christian couldn't help but smile at the futility of the threat. Ana could be many things, but scary was not one of them.

She cuddled against him, making Bastille interrupt his purr, probably to glare at Ana bothering him during an intense seance of petting, and Christian kept his eyes closed, knowing that he would be better off not arguing with Ana and the emptiness of her threat. After all, she could change the threat to something she had a grasp on, like _abstinence_.

"You see? That's why you need a TV. We could have some background noise, instead of waiting for Bastille to purr," She suddenly complained, making Christian smirk, before he reached for the remote of his stereo and put some music on.

More than once, Ana had criticised his minimalism. It wasn't much that she minded per se, but more that she found it odd that Christian, who was a working and functioning member of a capitalist society, was anything but the ultimate consumer. His walls were blanks, his appliances were of the strict minimum, and Ana often joked that, had she not seen that room full of toys, she would have doubted Christian's ability to buy something simply because he wanted to.

Since they had gotten together, Ana had brought in a few things to give his apartment some life. Every now and then she brought flowers, or a plant (to Bastille's greatest pleasure). She also framed a few pictures of them, that Christian confined to his room, after all, he had been surprised a few times by his boss's unexpected visits, and Mia would often come up to feed Bastille. In fact, he had never set a rule with her not to go upstairs, but he knew that as long as he would not give her the go, she would not go. He simply knew it. It wasn't Mia's style to go snooping around in other people's business.

"So, you still didn't tell me. What do you want to do for your birthday?" Ana asked, tearing him out of his thoughts.

Christian smirked, opening his eyes to look at the brunette in his arms as he sensually told her, "Well, how about we do what I have been deprived of today?"

If Ryan could hear him, he would definitely make fun of him. The word pussy-whipped would also most likely be mentioned, if not to his face, at least thought of. Though Christian doubted that Ryan would sensor himself, even for him. He knew that amongst the men he worked with he had this bad image of never letting loose, and being rather cold and unforgiven. But that never stopped Ryan from telling him what he thought, even when all he wanted to do was vent about Raymond. Sure, Christian was sure that there were topics that Ryan avoided with him on purpose, but he had always been straight with him. Which was probably why he was the man Christian trusted the most.

Ana rolled her eyes, not pleased with the tease. "I mean, besides _that_. We can't decently have sex all day long."

Christian was about to argue that it was very much possible when the full meaning of the sentence made its way to his brain. "All day?"

Ana slightly frowned, before she inquired, "you're not working on your birthday, are you?"

"Of course, I am."

She slightly narrowed her eyes at him, and pouted as she tried to convince him, "Can't you take the day off?"

"_No one_ takes a day off for their birthday, Ana."

"Yeah, but you're not anyone. Dad never works on his birthday, he spends it with me. I'm sure you could do that as well."

Christian was very well aware that every year, on February the first, Raymond stayed at his mansion, spending the day with his daughter, the two of them having the time of their lives. Raymond always came back to work with a smile on his face, telling Christian how much of a blessing children could be. But that was Raymond …

"I am not your Dad." It wasn't even on a personal level. It was just that he had never taken a day off and that it felt weird to simply impose one out of the blue. No matter his place in the hierarchy, he was not Raymond Steele.

Ana rolled her eyes, clearly thinking that he could pull some strings, and so he told her, "I work for your Dad, I am not him, no matter how it looks. I can't take a day off like that, last minute, out of nowhere."

"It's not out of nowhere, it's for your _birthday_," She argued, before adding with a small voice, "I just thought we would spend it together."

"But I have to work, babe. It's not like I don't want to."

She once again narrowed her eyes at him, but this time, Christian knew that she was going to win the argument. When she had the last stone that would make the balance weight on her favour, she always scrunched her nose a little. Not much, but just enough for her upper lip to get closer to her nostrils, without ever touching them. Every time she had the winning argument, she had made this face, and this time was no different.

"I just thought that we could have at least _one_ celebration together. Since you _forgot_ our one year anniversary."

Christian let his head fall backwards, repressing a groan. Three weeks ago was supposedly their one year anniversary, and Ana had planned it all. When he came home, late that night, he saw a beautiful table dressed for two, with candles and untouched food, and two mugs that clamped into one another. One for '_His Tea_', the other for '_Her Coffee_'. And in his bedroom had been a sleeping Ana, wearing blue lingerie and with a face showing signs of obvious tears. He had had no idea that this was their anniversary, and Ana had been really upset with him for forgetting such an important date for them. But then again,

"Technically, our anniversary should be when we decided on our little arrangement, here in New York. So I still have a month to—"

"_Everyone_ knows that the day of your relationship anniversary is the day you kiss. And if I recall properly, we did plenty of kissing in Japan. And not part of me was left unkissed."

Christian didn't reply anything, because she always used that argument, and he had nothing to retort to that. Especially after Mia unknowingly backed Ana on that whole kissing is important business when he lightly mentioned that he forgot their one year anniversary. still, he was grateful, because Mia helped him pick up a present to redeem himself. A clock, with a map of the world as a background, where he coloured the places they had already been together.

According to Mia, it was a perfect gift because traditionally one would offer something related to his significant other after one year (the map). But as times evolved, it became a clock. So he had both in one.

"I'll see what I can do," He conceded, rewarded by her brightest smile before she kissed him,

"Thank you."

"I'm not promising anything, Ana," He warned, not wanting her to have false hopes, and end up crying once again during one of their celebrations.

"I know. But I appreciate the effort."

She kissed him once again, before getting up, saying that she didn't plan to stay here for so long. Christian walked her to the door, and when she was about to leave, she turned and kissed him again, before letting him know, wiggling her eyebrows,

"And just so you know, your birthday starts at midnight. So don't be late."

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**Christian's PoV**

The very same night Christian was having dinner with Raymond and few politicians at the Mile High, planning a campaign that would put Paul in an excellent position for the next mayoral election in two years. Christian was only half listening to what was being said, mostly because it was all repeats and repeats of things he had already gone over with Paul and he was not much of a fan of politics. He understood why Raymond meddled in them, and why it was important to have someone in his pocket, especially someone as important as Paul was meant to be. But he simply didn't like politicians.

Which was probably why he never even tried to socialise with Paul. A few times, Jack and other businessmen with whom he worked at Clark Inc had asked him to go out with them for a drink, or a club; and Christian had most of the time gave in, sticking to the adage to keep one's friends close, and one's enemies closer. But he never managed to do it with Paul. To him, someone who could so easily lie was not someone that could be trusted in his personal life.

Sure that could be applied to lawyers as well, and therefore to Mia. But he had known Mia before she started studying, even if it was for a brief period f time. And … he knew that Mia would not lie to him, just like he would not lie to her. She was one of his closest friends, and no matter how wary he usually was of people, he couldn't picture Mia betraying him.

He was actually relieved that Ana also shared his point-of-view on politicians. At some point, he had asked her why she would always take Paul as her date, though the confrontation might have been more intense than he had intended. She assured him that there was nothing going on between her and Paul and that she picked him because she knew that there never would be anything given the fact that he was a politician.

Of course, during this conversation came the matter of Jack, and of how much time she was spending with the guy. Though Christian had to admit that she was often accompanied by Elliott and Katherine when she would go out with Jack. Apparently, though they had not been close friends, they had all been to the same school, ultimately ending up in the same class several times. Which made Christian see Jack with much more respect.

He had known that he was young, but knowing he was the same age as Ana, and already working in his father's place made him see the blond man with another light. Jack knew what he wanted, and was not afraid to go for it. And apparently, not afraid to cut ties with those who hurt him. He had completely cut off his father's helping his mother (and stepmother) to win the trial and rip him of all his money.

As they were looking at the dessert menus, Christian noticed that finally, Raymond was not participating in any conversation, and so he went with the mission Ana had entrusted in him, and dropped the bomb,

"I'm taking the day after the next off."

For a moment, Christian wondered if Raymond had heard him for he did not say a word, his eyes still roaming the menu. But then, his mentor asked, "Any particular reason?"

"Personal reasons," He eluded, aware that he could not say a word more without putting at risk his relationship with Ana.

Raymond rose an eyebrow, putting his menu down as he let Christian know, "I thought you didn't celebrate your birthday."

"Who said it's the reason behind my day off?" Christian countered, not the least surprised that Raymond knew of his birth date. He even wondered if Raymond knew of the tattoo he had gotten on his chest.

The older man nodded, not questioning Christian any longer before he gave his order to the waiter and dove into the conversation Paul was having with a Senator. Once again, Christian only listened with one ear, taking mental notes if anything new came into light.

He surprisingly saw Ethan come and go, only stopping to tell something to the manager who wiggled her eyebrows at him before he left. Jose had told him that he was due to officially meet the Kavanagh parents soon, and apparently, his partner had just made the reservation for them to eat at his own restaurant.

He let his eyes wander from the different clients eating here, to the busboys hurrying to bring their plates to the customers, to the waiters and waitresses taking orders. And suddenly, something took his all attention. He saw a courier come into the restaurant, dressed with the uniform of a local company and walking to the manager. In all honesty, it was rather common for a courier to come to the Mile High, given the clientele … but not at dinner time.

The manager walked to them, and leaned down so only Raymond and Christian would hear what she had to say, "I have a courier here asking for you, sir? Shall I take the package, or are you willing to take it."

"Let him come," Raymond simply said, but Christian could tell that he was as curious as him to have a courier at this hour of the night.

The two men watched the young boy walk to them, his curly hair half hidden by his uniform cap. If he had to guess, Christian would say the boy was still in high school, probably working this job to put money aside for college. He gave Raymond the envelope, under the curious eyes of the people sharing their diner, and after signing the receipt, Raymond sent the boy away, giving a small polite smile to the table.

They all went back to their conversation, and the boss opened the envelop, sheltering the content from everyone but Christian and revealing pictures that made Christian's blood suddenly leave his body.

On the pictures, he could see an oblivious Ana, sitting at a café with some young man, smiling at him while holding her cup. But that wasn't what made Christian's heart stop. No, what made him feel like her was about to die was the fact that on every single pictures, there was a red target painted on Ana's face.

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**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So, I can't wait for your reactions to this chapter! I've been waiting for so long! Well, there are others, but this one, comes before the others, so …. **

💚**Also, I have to tell you guys, I almost ended the chapter a paragraph early … but I did not feel like leaving you on such a cliffhanger. I could have, but I don't want you to focus on 'Does Raymond know or not?" And more on WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING?!**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** So how about Christian's birthday? What do you think will happen?**

**💚 How Christian's thoughts about Jack and Will?**

**💚 How do think Raymond and Christian will react?**

💚**What did you think of this chapter overall? And what do you think will happen next?**

💚**What was your favourite part?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	49. Chapter48:The Maddening Ire Of A Mobster

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 48****: The Maddening Ire Of A Mobster (6,2K)**

💚‼️**Remember that this story is rated M not only because of lemon but also because of violence and strong content! This story isn't about unicorns and rainbows, and some VERY DARK AND HARD themes are in there! **‼️

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**Christian's PoV **

Christian stared dumbfounded at the pictures as Raymond flipped them one by one. They were all featuring Ana with the same guy. At a café, at a restaurant, getting out of the theatre or a boutique. Most of the times, she was smiling, or even laughing, oblivious of the fact that she was being followed and photographed each of these times. Oblivious of the fact that the guy with whom she was spending her time was just using her.

The man who was the other constant of these pictures was the son of Andrea Mazarati, Luca Mazarati. Christian had only seen him a few times, not really bothering to know much about him. The problem was his father, not him. Mazarati senior had been trying to crush Raymond for some time, and it seemed that this was his latest course of action to destabilised Raymond and take his place.

Though Mazarati was of Italian descent and had many businesses in his home country, he was mostly interested in what was happening in the US, probably because each time he had made a move to either make money, either have the monopoly over a business, Raymond had beaten him to it. And each time, Mazarati had been greener and greener, not able to shake Raymond from his pedestal.

But it seemed that finally, he had found how to make Raymond bend his way. If he couldn't beat Raymond on the business level, he was going to play with his heart. Even though Christian knew the truth, he also knew how these pictures looked like from an outsider of his couple, target removed. It seemed that Ana was dating Luca. They had all the tropes, the smiles, the places usually used for dates, and even the occasional touches of the arm or shoulder.

He rummaged his memory, trying to remember if Ana ever mentioned a Luca to him, but then recalled that though she was always clear to him when she was going out with friends, came a time when she stopped saying with whom. Whether the friend was Katherine, Elliott or Jack, Ana had stopped giving names and started just saying that she was meeting with a friend. It started around the time she and he had a fight about her going to Broadway with Sebastian Velrac. And this made Christian suddenly realise that she did not get the point. He did not mind if she was seeing a guy, he minded that _he couldn't_ take her out as he would like.

"Christian?" Raymond called, his voice blank though Christian could swear that there was an ounce of fear echoing there. He tore out of his thoughts and making him realise that he had been out of it for a moment.

He looked around the table, and most of their guests had stopped talking, looking at him and Raymond with curiousness. He glanced at his boss, seeing that his eyes were still glued on the pictures, his face void of colours, and finally, he broke out of his trance and came back to the harsh reality. At this right moment, he did not care about Idris, Raymond and the Mazarati, all he cared about was that _Ana was being threatened_. She was used as bait, and he was going to put a stop to it.

He stood up, surprised himself by the calm demeanour emanating from him, and took his phone out to call the one person he was blaming at this right instant. Luke picked up at the first ring, oblivious to all the anger Christian had for him at this moment.

"Where are you?" Christian demanded as he walked to the reception to retrieve his coat. He barely paid attention to Raymond and the rest of the guests who looked at him leave the table without a word to them.

"At the headquarters. I'm working on an update for the home invasion plan. Raymond has been on my back since you got back from Macau, and I would need you to try and —"

"Where is Anastasia?" Christian cut him off, really not in the mood for small talks, and pissed off that once again, Luke was slacking at his job. He was assigned to follow Ana whenever she would go out, and not just bug her phone. And he knew for a fact that she had planned to go to Broadway that very night, to see a new edition of Chicago.

"At Katherine's," Luke said, angering Christian even more. He did not even try to check his laptop (which was obviously in his grasp since he was working on an update) to see where Ana really was.

He deeply inhaled, not wanting to make a scene over the phone. If there were any problems that needed fixing, he would do it in person. "Meeting in an hour. Full staff. Get everyone on it."

Then he hung up, once again surprised by his eerie calm, and he walked back to the table, his coat on, calling the only person he knew he could trust at this right moment. When Jose answered, he barely gave him the time to say hello, that he was already telling him,

"I need you to tail Anastasia Steele. _Right now_."

"I thought Luke was that now," Jose questioned, startled to be asked to do something he hadn't done in months.

"Forget about him. I need _you_ to take care of that for now," Christian dismissed, and just as he knew he would, Jose accepted without asking for any more details.

Christian hung up, not bothering to tell his friend where Ana was. He knew that Jose knew how to track her down, and how to be in her shadow without her even knowing about it. And most importantly, he knew that Jose would not fail him, that he could trust the man to look after the woman he loved, and to notice if there was some creeper taking pictures of her, or _worse, aiming for a head with a rifle_.

Raymond looked at him, apparently still in shock with the pictures he received, and Christian took them out of his hands as he assured him, "I'm on it, boss."

Though if he were honest with himself, what he was about to do was more for his self-gratification than for Raymond's. He left the restaurant and hailed a cab so he could get back to his place, a tiny hope in him telling him that Luke had been right and that Ana was indeed at 'Katherine's'.

Once in the back of the yellow car, he called Ryan, and gave him a simple order, "I want Andrea Mazarati at the headquarters in an hour."

There was a small silence, before Ryan argued, "Christian … Getting Mazarati is not like getting some groceries. It's —"

"I don't care. You take as many men as needed, and you get me Mazarati. Take him to the hangar, and I'll meet you there as soon as I'm finished with other businesses."

Once again, Ryan hesitated, "I don't know if raiding Mazarati house is a really good idea, right now."

"He's not home. He's not stupid enough to be in his own home with his wife and kids. Call Luke and ask him about it. I'm sure he'll be able to tell you."

Ryan agreed, telling him that he would keep him updated of any delay, though Christian could tell by the sound of his voice that he did not understand or agree with this course of action.

Though the ride to his building was short, Christian was tempted all along to call Ana and assure himself that she was alright. But there was a great percentage of chance that she was perfectly fine, and she would only be worried by him calling her. If she was at his place, he could always pretend that he had simply forgotten something, and leave again, after having been reassured by his own eyes that she was okay, if she was not … he was sure that Jose would keep him in the loop.

Once in the building, he walked straight to the lift, when the receptionist stopped him by hailing him, making Christian having to repress his desire to roll his eyes. Jerry was a nice guy, who did his job right. There hadn't been a day when Christian did not see a smile on Jerry's face, despite the fact that he was always on night shifts. But Jerry was just _too nice_ for Christian's taste. There was nothing wrong with him, he was just too nice.

"There was some courier who came by earlier for you, Mr Grey. He left that for you," Jerry merrily said, unknowingly knocking the wind out of Christian's lungs.

He took the envelope, barely thanking Jerry as he walked back to the elevator. It was the exact same envelop that Raymond had received earlier, with the exact same content. Which could only mean one thing in Christian's eyes. Mazarati knew about him and Ana. There were no other logical explanations as to why he would send him copies otherwise.

And the only person who also knew of his relationship with Anastasia Steele was Agent Taylor, currently relocated to LA. Which meant that the little weasel did not keep his end of the bargain. When he entered his apartment, he was in a state of fury that he had never thought was possible. Especially when he asserted that the flat was empty.

He took his phone out to call Jose back but saw a text that at least helped him calm down a bit.

**Intermission, Ana is having a drink with Elliott, Katherine and Jack. She came with her own car, so most likely she will go back to the mansion tonight. I'll drop by your place when she'll be sleeping. Jose **

Christian let out a sigh of relief, before looking once again at the pictures threatening the woman he loved. With a sigh, he put his own envelope in his safe, before going to the parking lot and taking his car to the headquarters, Raymond's envelop still with him.

Once at the headquarters, he waited for a little before getting out of his car, so he could call one of the people who would dearly pay for the affront they have done to him. Jason Taylor did not answer the call, leaving Christian snarl with gritted teeth at the voicemail,

"You played with the wrong dog, Taylor. I'm coming for you."

Then, he left his car and walked straight to the room where he knew Luke was. As instructed, most men working for Idris in New York that had a rank in the hierarchy were there, all looking at Christian anxiously, not knowing why he had summoned them. They were all in attention position while Christian walked straight to Luke and asked a very simple question,

"Did I, or did I not warn you about doing the job that has been trusted upon you?"

"You did," Luke said, though his voice was far from emanating confidence. The other men all looked at the exchanged, not daring to make a move or say a thing as Christian finally let out his rage express itself.

"So, why didn't you do the fucking job?"

"I did, Christian," Luke assured, panic starting to show on his face. Christian glared at him, and took a picture out of Raymond's envelop to show it to Luke as he growled,

"Don't you dare lie to me, Sawyer."

Luke's eyes grew large when he saw the picture. Christian knew it wasn't much the picture of a target drawn on Ana's face that scared him, but more the consequences that such a picture could have for him, knowing Raymond's short temper when it came to his daughter.

Christian took a step back and showed the picture to all, so they could all understand the gravity of the situation. "Let me remind you all for whom you work. _Raymond Steele_. You're not working for some lowlife politician, you're not working for the State, you're not working for some millionaire with extravagant whims. You are _all_ working for Raymond Steele. He owns this town, he owns your lives, he owns to your very souls.

And here," He pointed Ana on the picture. "Is the person he treasures the most in this world. So if the man tells you to kiss the floor she walked on, you do it. If he tells you to walk behind her with an umbrella to shade her from the sun, you do it. And if he tells you to become her shadow, _you fucking do it_!"

"Christian," Luke started, but Christian glared at him.

"I am not done!" He roared, surprising every single man in the room. Over the years that Raymond formed him to become his second, Christian had settled down his authority. Slowly, but surely, his word had become as sacred as Raymond's, and his presence as feared. And still, Christian never rose his voice. No matter what, no matter who screwed up, or who tried to sell them out, Christian had always been calm, keeping his voice at the same level.

"I don't care for your excuses, Sawyer. I don't care that you think she 'deserves' a normal life. I don't care that you think that Raymond is overprotecting his daughter. I told you before, and I'm telling you again, _it is not up to you to make that kind of decisions_. You have a boss, you do as he says. Why is that so hard for you to understand?"

There was a dead silence during which all eyes were on Christian who kept at looking at Luke who had his head bent down. He muttered something that Christian didn't quite understand.

"What?"

"She said that she wanted some 'me-time' and that she would call if necessary. She said she didn't want her father to know all about her life."

Though he did not show it, this shocked Christian. He didn't expect from Ana to try and act in such a devious way. This was such a Raymond move. To say one thing, and then try to find a way around it. But still, that excused nothing.

"So what? Is _she_ your boss?" Christian inquired with a cold demeanour.

"No."

"So why the fuck do you care about what she says, then?"

"I just wanted —"

"I don't care about what you wanted! You're on a payroll, there is no want in the matter. Do you want to know what I want? I want my boss to not receive that kind of pictures in the middle of his business meal. I want my boss to know that he can rely on any of us to keep the apple of his eyes safe. I want to know that I can count on each of you. "

Luke hardly swallowed, and Christian took his fun out as he glacially said, "And obviously, you do not fit in that category."

And without much of a warning, or letting Luke try to defend himself one last time, he shot him dead in the head. His body fell on the ground with a loud thud, under Christian's cold eyes. He did not care the least in the world for his action. All he could think of was that the pictures would never have been taken in the first place if Luke had done his job right. _What if the photographer had been a hired gun_? He pushed the thought out his head, not wanting to go toward that dangerous territory.

He looked one last time at Luke's inanimate body, a bitter part of him even more annoyed at the dead man. He had warned him the last time that there would not be another warning. He had warned him to keep a tight leash on Ana. And yet, Luke did as he wanted, and endangered the woman Christian loved.

With a shake of his head, Christian looked up, only noticing then the presence of Raymond and Ryan at the threshold looking at him, and he pointed the corpse on the floor,

"If any of you feel like making a judgement call on how things are run here, or on an assigned mission, or disagreeing with strict and direct orders, leave now, or end up like him."

Christian let his eyes wander on each man standing in front of him, feeling Raymond's hard gaze on him. He knew that he was most likely in trouble, after all, he was the one who recommended (and even pushed) Luke to take the position, and it had obviously been a poor judgement on his part. And though Raymond did not know how much he cared, Christian couldn't even bear to think that Ana could have been the one to pay for his lack of discernment.

"Dismissed," He said with a sigh, letting the men know that they were good to go back to their previous occupations.

He watched them all leave the room, each respectfully and fearfully nodding their head to Raymond as they passed in front of him, but Raymond only looked at Christian, staying near the door, his face hard as a rock. The two of them for everyone to leave, but Ryan never left.

"I'm sorry that I failed you," Christian apologised, not really caring for Ryan's presence. He was man enough to admit when he had been at fault, and the proximity of a third party was not something strong enough to stop him from making amends.

Finally, Raymond tore his gaze from Christian's eyes and glanced at Luke, his face closed and unreadable. Christian waited for him to make a comment on his incompetence, or more importantly, on his sudden outburst and lack of usual calm; but he did nothing of the sort.

"Ana is home, with Jose staying around." Christian nodded, though he already knew that piece of information. Though she had been at the theatre earlier, her show was probably long done at this moment. "Ryan locked me Mazarati in the hangar," Raymond added, with a small nod of his chin, telling Christian to follow him there.

The three men went to the hangar where Mazarati was bound to a chair, apparently, neither bothered or shocked to find himself in this position. On the contrary, a smirk grew on his lips as Raymond walked closer to him. Ryan and Christian stopped a few feet away from them, though Christian wished that Raymond had stayed at the restaurant so he could let out all his rage and frustration on the man who dared threaten the woman he loved.

"So, I see that you got my pictures," Andrea said, making Christian sketch his feet to control himself. He couldn't tell if he would have been for quick and brutal, or long and painful if Raymond hadn't been claiming this one.

"I see that you have a death wish," Raymond placidly replied. Andrea replied, not fazed the least in the world by his enemy's cold and calm tone.

"You won't do that. We both know that you can't kill me. I'm too important for you to get rid off without heavy consequences."

There was truth in his words. Though he had never managed to take Raymond's place as number one, Andrea Mazarati still had a strong influence in the underground, and killing him would mean getting several influent people on their backs, probably important deals they had with Idris.

"No one is too important," Raymond simply announced. "_No one but my daughter_. And you think that you can threaten her, and leave unscratched. Have you lost your mind?"

In the blink of an eye, Raymond had his hand around Andrea's neck, squeezing it until the man's face became blue. Christian saw the tension in his boss's shoulders, understanding the internal dilemma within him. A part of him wanted to kill him, just for having laid eyes on Ana, but he still needed to know why. And also, if they wanted to kill him, they needed to make it look natural, just so Idris could steer clear of the mess his death would unfold.

With a grunt, Raymond released, turning his back on the man who was trying to ruin his life; and while Andrea was coughing up for air, he admitted, "It wasn't my idea."

Christian slightly tilted his head, interested both by the information and by the easiness it came out of the man's mouth. He attentively studied him, reading on his face that he had not expected Raymond's violence, and, given the scare now clear on his face, he had seen that for a moment, Raymond had been willing to go further and kill him.

Raymond also turned an interested head to Andrea, before removing his jacket. Knowing what it meant, Christian walked to the trunk where they kept most of their instruments, but Raymond shook his head, explaining as he rolled up his sleeves,

"When it comes to Ana, I will choke the life out of any threat to her with my bare hands. I don't need any utensils to slow me down."

Christian nodded, staying silent while his eyes went back to Andrea, a new reality coming to him. This might be his last night on Earth. Raymond was ready to beat the truth out of Andrea, and since the scumbag had sent doubles to Christian, he knew about him and Ana, and he was going to squeal. And given the state of fury Raymond was at the moment, this betrayal from his second in command was not going to end well for the man in question.

"So tell me, who had the _wonderful_ idea to orchestrate this horror?" Raymond eerily asked, but Andrea simply glared at him. The blond man's lips twitched slightly, a vicious smirk appearing briefly on his face. "Tell me who thought I would comply if they threatened my child."

Once again, Andrea remained silent, and Christian could see what would play out before it even happened. This wasn't the first time he was seeing Raymond beat someone for information, though it was the first time it involved even in a somewhat small level his daughter. Raymond Steele was a strong man. No matter how he looked to the world, Christian knew the truth. The nice and educated way to talk might hide it, the nice designer clothes might hide it, but Christian knew how much muscles Raymond hid behind this facade. And he was about to prove how much of a bully he could be when he wanted.

He cracked his knuckles, making Ryan glance in Christian's direction, probably hoping that Christian would play the 'good cop' in this scenario, and Christian had to repress a sneer. Ryan had never been more wrong in his life. If anything, Christian would gladly be the little devil in Raymond's left shoulder, telling him to torture the man until he would die of painful agony.

"Andrea, if there is one thing that you know about me, it's that I am not a patient man," Raymond warned, his face showcasing his words as he ticked of impatience.

"I mostly know that you've been a pain in my ass for many years, stealing away good businesses and deals I could have gotten if you hadn't been constantly in the way."

Raymond clenched his jaw, and let out his first blow, making Andrea snap his head to the side and spit some blood. "Who had the _brilliant_ idea to stalk my daughter?" He asked with a calmness that made Christian wonder if he would have been the same.

"Go to Hell!"

"Don't you see? You're already there?" Raymond snarled, before grabbing Andrea's ear and twisting it hard. "Who put you up to this?" He roared, clearly losing his patience, and when he was met once again with Andrea's stubbornness, he punched him so hard that the tied man's jaw dislocated.

With a loud inspiration through his nose, Raymond took a step back, briefly glancing at Christian for him to fix the problem. Christian walked to the man, taking his face between his hands and doing his best to repress himself from simply cracking the man's neck. He placed his thumbs inside Andrea's mouth, just on his lower molars, and snapped the jazz back into place. It wasn't much that either Raymond to him cared about the comfort of Mazarati, but a man with a dislocated jaw always had some difficulties to talk properly.

When he was done, he resumed his previous position, glancing once again at Ryan who was watching the scene passively. He wondered what the man was thinking, or if he even cared. It was probably to him an extortion of information like any other.

"Who set you after my daughter?" Raymond repeated, making Andrea snicker with difficulty as he replied,

"Really, Raymond? Is that the best you can do? Do you really think that beating me u—"

"I think there is one thing you don't understand, Andrea. There is only one way for you to leave that hangar, and it's both feet up. Now, the only question is how much pain are you willing to endure before that occurs."

As he said those words, Raymond took four fingers from Andrea's right hand and bent them the wrong way. He kept on going, until they all cracked, some dislocated, others plainly broken. Mazarati screamed in pain but still did not give Raymond the information he wanted, playing dangerously with the man's nerves. Raymond punched him in the throat, with such a force that the man and his chair fell backwards, and as Christian put him back on his feet, Raymond asked again,

"Who?"

"You can kill me if you want, but I'm never going to tell you."

Raymond rose his arm, ready to strike again, when he stopped midair, his eyes lingering on the man tied up in front of him. Slowly, he put lowered his hand, a wicked smile spreading his lips and he said,

"So, the other star of those pictures is the brain behind it all."

This revelation shocked Christian at first. He had never really taken Luca seriously. From the few encounters he had with the young man, it seemed that the Mazarati son was someone who was not interested in the affairs of his father, though, unlike Ana, he was very well aware of what kind of game his father played. But apparently, Luca Mazarati had well hidden his game, for Christian knew that Raymond never really cared for the boy either.

Now, it made sense why Andrea would rather die in a slow and agonising pain than give Raymond the answer he wanted. He did not want to bring Raymond's ire down his own flesh and blood. It was one thing he could concede to the man, Andrea Mazarati tried to protect his own till the very end.

"I never said anything," The man denied, only betrayed by the fear playing in his voice, which made Raymond smirk at him.

"Yoy don't have to say a word. But what I want to know is why your son went after my daughter? Was he trying to prove himself to you? Or maybe too much of a coward to face me directly?"

At first, it seemed like Andrea was decided to go back to being silent; but then he glared at Raymond with all the might he could conjure from his fragile position and spat in his face,

"Do you _really_ have to ask? She's the one and only leverage that anyone can have over you. And leverage is the only way we can make you listen to reason. You can't have it all, Raymond. You can't own most of this town and eat all my business abroad away. Especially when that business takes place in my home country! It doesn't work like that. One man cannot be allowed to have so much power over others without facing repercussions!"

Raymond slightly tilted his head to the side, as if barely interested by what Andrea said before he leant forward, getting dangerously close to the man. Christian took a step forward, not wanting to kill the man anymore. But Raymond simply put his hand on the arms of the chair as he slowly stated,

"I expect always repercussions. In fact, I face repercussions on a daily basis. And the greater the power, the greater the burden. But let me tell you one thing, my daughter will never have to even _think_ of those repercussions."

Then, Raymond stepped back, looking down on Andrea as if he was just a vermin on his boot. All his life, Christian had seen that, no matter what he did to them, or what they tried to do to him, Raymond always respected his enemies. Some more than others. But there was still that professional respect that Raymond had for his peers.

But as he circled Andrea Mazarati, that respect was long gone. In fact, Christian could easily say that Raymond had more respect for a junkie at this right moment than for the man in the chair. He watched his boss place himself behind Andrea, taking his head between his arms as he said in a sickly sweet tone,

"Don't worry, you will soon be reunited again with your son."

Before he could even think of an appropriate way to say this, Christian said in a tone that almost sounded like an order, "Don't kill him!"

And at the exact same moment, Andrea played the last card of his game, "You can't kill Luca!"

Christian caught from the corner saw Ryan snap his head at him with shock and confusion, but he kept his eyes on Raymond, and the way his arms had barely loosened the tight grip they had on Andrea's neck. Raymond looked down on the man beneath him, and asked with an amused smile,

"And why pray to tell, can't I kill your son? As you said before, there are repercussions in life."

Andrea tilted as he could his head upward before he let them know, "Are you really going to kill your daughter's boyfriend? Anastasia is falling for him, and soon, the two of them will be so infatuated that all your business will be Luca's. We all know how much you love your daughter, you won't kill my son, because it would hurt her."

Christian had to admit that Andrea's plan could make a certain sense if it didn't have the major flaw of Ana only seeing Luca as a friend. And though Raymond did not know of his daughter's love life, the statement still made him laugh, before he said,

"What Ana doesn't know, won't hurt her. _Ever_. Second, my daughter knows better than to love a mobster. She already has one in her life, she won't be weighing herself with another one. She's smart enough to stay away from those like you and me."

The three men from Idris distinctly heard the sigh of defeat from the other man before Raymond looked at Christian, his eyebrow up, expecting an explanation to his latest statement.

"Let him live. Let him live, and I'll kill his son. He wanted to stay passive while his son did all the dirty work, it should go like that in death as well. Let him live, with the knowledge that his inactions caused his son's death."

Though Christian wanted the satisfaction to kill himself the man who had orchestrated this whole thing, there was still this undeniable concept. Outliving a child was a horrible thing to live through, even more, when you were the reason behind his death. Christian may not have children, he still knew that this was the one thing that no one wanted to ever experienced. Especially those who loved their offspring. Andrea would suffer way more if his son died before him.

And just the way he was now begging Raymond to not listen to his send in command comforted Christian in his idea. Andrea would be devastated by the death of his son. He wickedly smiled in his direction, a whole new plan blooming in his mind, before he looked back at Raymond, hoping for approval.

He knew that Raymond was ruthless, but he was also a father, and Christian had no doubts that at this right instant, he was putting himself in his enemy's position. The phrase to not wish it upon your worst enemy suddenly had a whole new dimension to him. But the hesitation barely lasted for half a second. He loosened his grip, and put some distance between Andrea and him as he nodded his agreement, unknowingly according to Christian his desire for revenge.

With a loud sigh, he rolled down his sleeves, instructing, "Ryan, see that Andrea finds his way to a hospital who will take care of the wounds caused by his car accident."

Ryan nodded, the four men present in the room aware that this simple sentence had a whole other meaning. Beside bruises and a few broken bones, Andrea did not suffer much. Ryan had just been ordered to stage a car accident, and therefore, inflict all the wounds that such an incident could provoke.

Then, Raymond put his jacket back on, and took his phone out, signalling to Christian to follow him. Christian did, seeing as they exited the room that Raymond would be calling Ana as soon as their conversation would be over.

"Get rid of Luca. Something nice and clean, I won't give Andrea the satisfaction to have the media and the cops fussing all over his son's death."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian watched as Luca Mazarati was peacefully sleeping, thinking that this was the downside of his upbringing. No matter how deep would be his sleep, Christian knew that if someone snuck up on him, he would have to be drugged to not immediately wake up. This had actually been a problem during the first weeks he had Bastille, he woke up every time the cat moved near his room until his brain assimilated Bastille's night strolls as normal background noises.

For a moment, Christian was tempted to simply kill the man in his sleep and obey the order that had been given to him. But he wanted Luca to know why he was killed. He actually wanted him to be conscious that he would die. So he pulled a chair next to the bed, drawing his gun out and aiming at the sleeping man, before he kicked the bed, waking up Andrea's son.

Luca blinked, sitting straight in his bed when he saw that he was held at gunpoint, and Christian observed that it took the young man a few seconds before recognising him. He viciously smiled, and asked,

"Do you know who I am?"

"Christian Grey."

"I guess you know why I am here?"

Luca nodded, resigned, which Christian found rather annoying. He would have rather him to beg for his life or try to bargain. Seeing him so resigned was … anticlimactic.

"I have a question that has been nagging me … Why send doubles to my place?" After having thought about it a bit, Christian had to admit that Luke had nothing to gain to sell him out like that to an enemy. Raymond would have been a safer bet. And moreover, Andrea never mentioned the doubles while being tortured, which meant that either he did not know about them, either he did not deem them and their destination important.

"Because you are Raymond's second in command. Because everyone knows that what affects him, affects you," Luca answered, making Christian nod of understanding. He ought Jason Taylor an apology. He did not betray him, after all.

"You have no idea how much it affects me," He admitted with a devious smile.

Luca opened big wide eyes, understanding what Christian was saying through half words, and Christian found a perverted pleasure of seeing Luca think that he should have played his cards differently. Would Christian had been the only one informed of those pictures, things might have turned out differently. _Might have_.

"So … I have two options for you. Either you drink this," He said, showing the little vial he took out of his pocket that contained an untraceable poison.

"If you do, it will look like you died in your sleep, and you won't even suffer. This will give your family to have one last good image of you. Either you decide to make it worth my while and struggle. In this case, you will die as well, but in pain, and I will make it look like a suicide, which means your family will have to have a wake with a closed coffin if you get my drift. So which option is it going to be?"

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So many things have been showed and evoked here. And though I want to talk all about it, I won't because if I do, I might spill about what will happen next in the story. Just know that, though many of you think that there will be a big showdown like in action movies, this is a drama story, so … nope. It's a love story, in which there is still a chunk of the story missing, so don't expect guns and explosions as the final twist … it won't happen in this story. **

💚**Also, before some of you jump on my throat, saying that this Mazarati plotline comes from nowhere, this family has been introduced as rivals since chapter four, and mentioned several times, always being a pain in the butt. It is on purpose that I never lingered on them, because up until this point, Christian never took them seriously. In fact, he never took anyone seriously, because he knows his position of power. So this situation will actually change his way to deal with other mobsters … **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** So Christian killed Luke! In cold blood! How do you feel about this?**

**💚 What do you think of the hangar scene? And what do you think of Ryan staying throughout the interrogation?**

**💚 What do you think Christian's extra plan is? I really want to know your ideas on this one, because I want to know if anyone is as twisted as me, haha**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	50. Chapter 49: The Woman He Loved

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 49****: The Woman He Loved (7,5K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** So, I have to say, I would not like to be your employee. Most of you would kill me if I made a mistake, just like Christian killed Luke. This is so not cool … Haha**

💚 ‼️** Also, remember that the story is RATED M. I mean if you can't handle mature content, you shouldn't keep reading. I know that I am repeating myself here, but I know what this story will contain, and I don't want to read complains about this content. **‼️

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

As Christian was driving from New York to Georgia, he did his best to clear his mind from what happened during the last few hours. Instead, he stayed focused on the road and his mission, ignoring his fatigue and the rising sun subtly letting him know that he had gone more than twenty-four hours without sleep. It wasn't until eight in the morning that he was torn away from his inner thoughts by his phone.

He swiftly checked the identity of the caller, before activating his Bluetooth and answering to his boss, curious to know if Raymond knew what he was up to, or if he was going to summon him so they could have a debrief of the night and the events that lead to it.

"I'm reading the papers, there are no mentions of Luca's death," Raymond unceremoniously said, making Christian smirk to himself.

He knew that his boss was determined to keep himself away from the media. Not that he ever cared to be in the paper, after all, a criminal of his scale could not escape appearing once in a while in the paper for less than flattering reasons. He, himself, had already been the star of a few uncomplimentary articles that usually made him chuckle more than it should.

Still, knowing his boss, and knowing how he would think and anticipate everything, what Raymond did not want, was to see his name associated with Luca's because of Ana. He did not want his sweet and oblivious daughter to have any reason to doubt that he could have anything to do with the death of a friend, especially when that friend could be seen as a potential boyfriend, given the pictures that were taken.

"Check the obituaries in a couple of days. His name should be mentioned. The poor bastard died in his sleep last night. It's no surprise, given his health condition," Christian lightly said, as if he was simply talking about the weather.

Luca Mazarati was known to suffer from severe asthma, which was one of the reasons why Christian never really paid attention to him. He always figured that Andrea would never give the reign of his fragile and small empire to a sick kid, even though that kid was his own. Though Andrea probably had the education and the training to follow in his father's footsteps, Mother Nature did not give him the body and health to do so. Who would ever take seriously someone who needed to constantly have an inhaler on him?

Which was why the 'natural death' that Christian orchestrated was perfect. In the best case, the coroner would simply say that Luca's lungs failed him. In the worst case, if the coroner decided to be thorough about his examination, he would conclude that Luca died of an overdose from his own medication. In both cases, Idris had no reasons to be suspected.

Which would have been more difficult if Christian had had to stage a suicide. Suicides usually lead up to investigations, especially from insurance companies that were too greedy to accept that some people decided to check out early. so, when Christian gave the choice to Luca, he was mostly bluffing. Staging a suicide would have required time and loneliness, which he did not have in the full (though sleeping) Mazarati house.

Raymond made a sound on the other end of the phone, that indicated that he approved, before he reminded Christian, "You asked for tomorrow off."

"That was before … Mazarati," Christian dismissed, more preoccupied in finding a decent replacement to Luke, than on celebrating his birthday. Moreover, he doubted that Raymond would let his daughter out of his sight before a long while.

"We'll talk about this the morrow. You need to cool down."

Christian slightly furrowed his brows, looking at the panel of his car, as if it was Raymond, not sure if he understood what his boss meant. He was very calm. In fact, he was surprised himself by the coldness and the zen emanating from him. He had anticipating being less in control since he had noticed that this was a pattern when Ana was concerned. But then again, maybe it was simply his training showing, not allowing him to show to the world what was his one weakness.

"What happened with Luke —"

"Was me simply making a point. I warned him to stick to her like a hawk, I wanted him months ago, and if he had listened, we would have never been in that situation. The latest picture was dated from two weeks ago," Christian campy said, knowing that he was right.

No matter who Luke had been to him, he did not feel an ounce of guilt over killing him. No matter the fact that he drove like a maniac throughout New York City to save his life, no matter the fact that he killed several people to avenge Luke's missing lung, no matter how guy nights they had spent together with Ryan, Christian did not care about Luke's death. All he cared about, was the fact that Ana could have died because of Luke's carelessness.

In fact, his lack of emotions made him start to question himself as a human being. He never questioned a kill or regretted one. But they had never been killed over people he personally knew. Even Lincoln, he had never trusted him, so he never tried to form a bond with him. But he had known Luke, he had seen him at his worst, and at his best. He even showed him a few tricks about the life, just like Luke showed him a few things about hacking.

And still, he felt nothing. He wondered if this was how serial killers felt, before dismissing the idea. At least, serial killers felt something when they killed their victims. Something twisted, psychotic, and sick, but it was still an emotion. Whether it was pleasure, power, or control, it was still an emotion. Whereas Christian felt _nothing_.

He shook his head, focussing back on Raymond, as he told him, "I have someone in mind to replace Luke as a shadow. But we still need to find a new tech guy."

"Jose can't look after Ana, Christian. Elena is leaning more and more on him with her —"

"I was not thinking about Jose. Someone else. Someone who's not in the business," Christian cut him off, waiting to hear Raymond's reaction to that. Luke hadn't been in the business either, and he turned out to be a complete fiasco. But he was Raymond's fiasco. Raymond was the one who picked him out of college and slowly but surely bought his loyalty to him and to him only.

"Fine. We'll talk about that Monday. Are you driving?" He asked, which Christian found as a strange transition. They were talking about the security detail of his daughter, to now his location.

"Someone had to take care of Luke," He let his boss know, so Raymond would know what he was doing. He could almost picture the older man nod before he questioned further,

"On your way to Georgia?"

"Yes. Don't expect me home before tonight."

"As I said, you have tomorrow off. Take the opportunity to enjoy Georgia's countryside."

On those words, Raymond hung up while Christian rolled his eyes. If there was one thing he was not going to do, was look at the landscape. He did not come to Georgia for that.

A couple of hours later, he arrived where he wanted to be, and after finding a good and recluse place, he started digging a hole in the ground. He could have gotten rid of Luke in a more efficient way, that would leave little evidence that would lead back to him, but he thought that he ought to Luke a proper burial.

Luke was born in Georgia raised in an orphanage there until he earned a scholarship to study in Silicon Valley. It was there that Raymond plucked him out of his beautiful and bright future and enrolled him in something that, after all, was not cut for the young man. Now that he was dead, Luke had no one to mourn him. No family, no girlfriend, no kids. Which Christian recognise was the reason Raymond hired him in the first place. Who would look for an orphan? Most of the people who meant something in the hierarchy of Idris did not have families, they were orphans or runaways, though a few of them had started making families of their own.

Once the hole was deep enough, Christian quickly dusted off the dirt on his clothes, before picking up Luke's body and throwing him in his final resting place. He started putting dirt on the corpse when he heard movements behind him. He did not even bother to look, recognising Ryan's footsteps. He had been expecting a conversation with him, after all, Ryan had always been close to Luke.

"At least, you're burying him where he wanted to be buried," Ryan said, accusation in his tone.

"I'm not a monster," Christian replied, still busying himself with his task. He had no doubts that Ryan probably took a plane to come here, which would explain his presence. Christian drove for most of the night, and a good part of the morning to get to Georgia, while Ryan must have taken the first flight to Atlanta, and then rented a car to get to where they were.

The two of them did not say a word while Christian finished burying properly the dead man, and before Christian threw back the last few patches of dirt, Ryan scattered on the improvised grave several seeds. Christian did not comment on it, repressing himself from rolling his eyes. He did not doubt that those were properly Luke's favourite plants, but he still found it ridiculous.

After he patted the dirt on the freshly turned upside down ground, Christian properly placed back the grass that he had meticulously taken out first. This was one of the reasons why it was easier to hide a body in the winter, there was no grass to betray the fact that you just dug something. But then again, the soil was much harder to dig into during the winter.

For a moment, the two men silently stared a the grave, Christian having no doubts that Ryan was mutely giving his last words to his friend, and it was when he started walking back to his car with the shovel, that Ryan started yapping and complaining about what happened,

"That was rather —"

"I won't apologise for shooting him," Christian firmly cut him off. He was not even going to justify himself. He had been in his right, and if Luke really cared for his life, he would have done the job the exact way he had been asked to.

Ryan bit his tongue while Christian was cleaning his shovel with oxygen bleach, to remove effectively any trace of dirt, along with his fingerprints. Once he was done, he cleaned his trunk, feeling Ryan's disproving eyes on his all along, but not caring one bit. Even without his dirty looks, it was obvious that Ryan did not like what Christian had done. The simple fact that he did not propose his help was proof enough.

But that did not bother Christian, he wasn't in the position he was so he could be liked. In fact, he did not care much about how other people felt about him. All he cared about was that the job was done, the way it was supposed to be done.

After his cleansing process, Christian dusted himself once again, before estimating that he was clean enough to not arise suspicions, and he climbed back in his car. He waited a few seconds, giving Ryan the possibility to ride home with him, which he did, and after an hour or so of silent driving, Ryan went back on his crusade,

"Don't you think it was a bit exaggerated. Luke didn't mean bad, and you know it."

"I don't care. I warned him, and he decided to not listen and do as he wanted. It was his right, but there are consequences to any decisions you make in life, and he just paid for one of those decisions."

It was as simple as that. It was what he said to everyone when he killed Luke. They were here to obey orders, not do as they pleased. Without order in their ranks, chaos would come, and Idris would crumble. And Christian would be damned if he let that happen while he was still breathing.

"Could you kill _me_ as easily and nonchalantly as you killed him," Ryan asked with curiosity and suspicion. Christian could almost swear that he even got his hand closer to his gun.

"No," He simply said, without even having to think about it, which Ryan noted,

"That was quick."

"I trust you, Ryan. I know you won't screw me over like that. I know that if I tell you something, you will do it. You might complain about it, you might tell me that you don't agree or don't approve, you might even ignore me for a week after that, but you will still do it. So unless you give me a reason, I don't see why I would ever shoot you."

"And what if I draw my piece on you for killing one of my friends?" Ryan nonchalantly asked, making Christian swiftly glance his way. There was nothing in his position that indicated that he would do it at this given moment, but then again, Ryan knew how to bluff. still, something told Christian that this was simply a rhetorical question, intended to know how far Christian would go.

"You better be quick about it."

"You just said that —"

"You shouldn't give me a reason. I think that threatening my life is a good reason for me to shoot."

Ryan did not retort anything, but Christian saw the small smile on the man's face. A small silence grew between them, only interrupted by the soft purr of the AC until Ryan said with an accusatory tone,

"You could have asked for his last words. It was the decent thing to do, given your relationship."

"I did not care to hear them," Christian simply said, changing the line on the highway.

"You can be so cold, sometimes."

"That's the job."

Ryan did not reply anything, which Christian found odd. One of the reasons why he appreciated Ryan more than others, was because he never really cared for Christian's positions and relationship with Raymond. When he had something to tell him, he would, even when no one else would.

So he tried to make Ryan understand how badly Luke screwed up, "Imagine that it was your kid that was targeted. W—"

"It wasn't my kid," Ryan swiftly cut him off. "And it will never be my kid. That's why I would never try to go after Raymond's position. I'm happy where I am. Anonymity is sometimes the best weapon you can have to protect yourself and your family."

This made Christian genuinely laugh. Though Ryan's theory was impeccable, it was still flawed when it came to real life. They were from a world where anonymity was the rarest and most difficult thing to have. He knew everything there was to know about Idris's enemies, down to the names and families of the most simple maid.

Ryan glared in his direction, before he said, "I know that the boss wants me to become your number two when you take over, but —"

"No. Raymond has nothing to do with that. _I_ am the one who wants you in that position. You were my first and second choice, and I told Raymond."

This seemed to surprise Ryan. "What about Jose?"

It was no secret to anyone working for Idris that Jose and Christian were close, and Christian had no doubts that everyone was expecting Christian to take Jose as his second in command. But what they did not know was of Jose side activity, and Christian knew that given the choice, Jose would rather follow Elena's footsteps rather than be his second. It wasn't much a question of loyalty, but more than what Elena and Jose were doing was something that meant a lot to Jose, and Christian would do anything he could to support him.

"Jose and I have our own arrangement," Christian eluded. Though he knew that as his future second in command, Ryan ought to know, he figured that he did not have to tell him until the two of them were actually in those positions.

Ryan nodded, as he slowly said, "Well … that's … something …"

Christian barely shrugged. To him, it was simply the natural order of things. Ryan was one of the few people he could rely on, to be honest, no matter what, just like he was doing by letting him know his disagreement over Luke's death.

"Although …" Ryan added, dragging the last syllable. "That whole talk about just is rather weird coming from you. Between you and I, we both know that this trust thing is only one-sided."

"What do you mean."

"I trust you, Christian, I really do. If I'm ever in the shit, you're the first person I'll call. If I need something, you're the first person I'll call. No matter how much you can … scare me sometimes, you're the one I'll call. But I'm not sure it goes both ways."

Christian rolled his eyes, not expecting Ryan to be such a sentimental guy.

"I'm not a teddy bear, Ryan. I trust you, and I'm telling you, and that should be it. I'm not going to sit in a bar with you and Patrick your hair while you talk about your feelings and shit."

"That's not what I'm talking about."

"Then what?" Christian asked, getting annoyed to have this talk. He wasn't used to having to justify what he would say, especially when his words were crystal clear.

"I know you have a girl," Ryan said, his eyes on Christian who kept his face as unreadable as usual, simply raising an eyebrow at the man. So Ryan explained his theory,

"We've been friends for how many years, Christian? Do you really think I wouldn't notice some of your habits changing? And I get it, I really do, revealing you have a girl to the world is a big move, because you're revealing one of your weaknesses to your enemies, your _only_ weakness in your case. But I'm not the world, I'm your friend. I'm the guy you say you trust so much you want _me_ as second in command."

"If you want to talk about girls, I suggest you call Maia," Christian eluded once again because, in truth, Ryan was right, he couldn't pretend to trust the man, and not tell him about the woman he loved, the woman of his life.

"My point, exactly. You know of Maia. You've met Maia. You've cooked for her. You've laughed at me with her. You helped her move in with me! Luke and you were the only ones who knew about her because no matter how open-minded Maia is about Idris, I don't want her to know too much, just like I don't want people to know about her. But _I trust you_ to know about the mother of my future children."

"Your point?" Christian asked, putting a slight hint of annoyance in his voice in the vain hope that Ryan would drop the topic.

"What's her name?"

"I'm not a girl, Ryan. I'm not talking about this."

For a moment, Christian wondered if Christian was going his usual pain in the ass, and keep digging into who was his girl; but Ryan simply shook his head and said something that Christian could not retort anything to,

"Like I said, one-sided."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian finally got home, it was two minutes before midnight. He had dropped Ryan a few minutes earlier at his place and had to decline Maia's pleas for him to share a meal with them. It was late, and he was tired, only thinking about his bed. But when he closed the door, he saw that Ana was there waiting for him in blue lingerie with a bright smile on her face. For a second, Christian was lost, before remembering that when midnight would strike, it would be his birthday.

"Happy birthday, honey!"

He stared at the brunette in front of him, who was holding a cake with some sort of drawing on it, but all he could do was look at Ana, only then realising how close he had been to losing her. Though he had thought about it a lot ever since the pictures, the full impact did not dawn on him before he saw her in person.

Those little moments of finding her in his home, those little texts she would send randomly, those little things she would do or say and that would always make him smile, he had been close to losing them forever. What if Luca and Andrea had decided that actions were better than words. What if they had decided that they should be more effective than simply sending pictures. What would he have done?

A lump grew in his throat as he realised that Ana's death would devastate him. When he almost die in Macau, she had been his last thoughts, but the idea of outliving her was unbearable. He wondered how Raymond did it. He knew that he had his revenge, but Christian doubted that, even with the satisfaction of revenge, he would ever be able to heal the ache in his heart. There would be a constant pain in him, that would find reminders of Ana in everything and anything.

Ana laughed and put the cake down and walked to him since he hadn't moved from the door ever since he came in. She took his face between her tiny hands, a loving smile on her lips and kissed him before telling him,

"Don't cry. It's just a cake. And I didn't even make it, it's from the bakery."

Christian blinked, swallowing the best he could, before urgently bringing her face to his and talking her to the nearest wall. He lost himself in their kiss, taking full control of it, and bringing to life any part of them that he was so afraid to lose if the worst were to ever happen. Ana was obviously surprised by the force Christian used, but she responded nonetheless, letting him take the lead.

When they were intimate, Christian had always been rather gentle with her, he had always shown concern about her wants and needs, and even when they got a little bit rougher, he had always had some sort of control over himself. But at this precise moment, this side of Christian was all gone. He was more like a desperate man wandering in a desert and finally reaching an oasis.

For a second, he considered taking her right then and there, but a small and lucid part of him made him take her in his arms, up to their bed. There, he looked at the beautiful woman spread on his sheets, looking at him with love, though he could see a bit of worry in the blue of her eyes. With a delicacy that clashed with his earlier moves, he caressed her cheek, letting her know with a strangled voice,

"You have no idea what you mean to me."

She leaned in his caress, sweetly smiling as if to say that she already knew. So he shook his head, and admitted, "If I ever lost you, I'd … I _can't_ lose you, Ana."

And just as he said those words, he buried his face in her neck, and himself in her. He felt her tense, obviously not prepared for that brutal intrusion, but she still welcomed it, just slightly moving her hips to be more comfortable. Christian lifted his head so he could look at the woman he loved, realising that she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He wanted to fall asleep next to her every night, and wake up next to her every morning. He wanted to feel her stomach growing with their child beneath his hand. He wanted to bear her tears and her joys. He wanted her to be his one constant in life, his one thing that would make the world seem less crazy, just because she was by his side.

He deeply kissed her, putting all his emotions in that one kiss, before he let her know, "You're the one thing that makes sense in my life. You're the one person who can bring me to my knees. You're …"

He couldn't even continue for his throat seemed so swollen, and so he let her know the rest by ravaging her, going back and force inside her while she looked deep into his eyes, both of her hands cupping his face.

"It's okay, Christian. I'm here. I'm yours."

Christian increased his thrusts, never breaking eye contact with her as he would occasionally repeat to her that she meant the world to him. At some point, his rhythm became somewhat animalistic, but he loved it. He loved the way Ana moved her hips to meet his thrusts, he loved the way she moaned his name, he loved the way she would tell him that she was his.

And finally, he released, feeling all sort of pressure leaving his body when he did so. For a long time, he stayed on top of Ana, brushing away the damp hair from her forehead and kissing her every once in a while, before he rolled on the side, completely spent. Ana snuggled against him, and he tightened his arm around her, half conscious of his moves. He hadn't slept in over forty-eight hours, and his body was telling him not to try to push it any further.

He felt, half asleep, that Ana got up, probably to use the bathroom, and what seemed half a second later, she was pulling the sheets over them, cuddling against him. She didn't say anything, simply tracing lines over his chest, which Christian had always appreciated, and just when he saw Morpheus at the corner, she asked,

"Everything alright?"

Christian hummed, mostly because he wasn't actually sure. But he did not want to have a conversation where his exhaustion could deform the meaning of his words.

"This is new," She said, her fingers tracing the lines of the tattoo he got himself a week ago. He had never been very opinionated about tattoos, but after catching Ana's sad expression every time her eyes landed on his wound, he had decided to cover it up.

Once again, he hummed, letting her know that she had his attention. gently, she contoured the design, before she curiously inquired, "It's not very masculine. Is that what I think it is?"

"Yes, it's a rose."

She did not respond anything to it, and when the minutes passed, Christian frowned and willed himself to open his eyes, not expecting to see what was before him. He noticed that she had braided her hair, and washed her face, which meant that she probably went to the bathroom for longer than he thought. But it wasn't what he lingered on. Ana was holding back her tears, which made him roll his eyes as he pointed out to her,

"It wasn't made to make you cry, babe. On the contrary."

She weakly smiled, before kissing the tattoo and then his lips. then, she snuggled back into his arms, making him feel like she wanted to make one with him.

"You make me feel so special sometimes. In ways that nobody has before."

Christian knew that she was expecting him to say something romantic along the times of a simple me too, but what came out of his mouth was something completely different, "And I hope nobody else never will."

He felt her smile against his chest while his mind was starting to drift to sleep, which was why he wasn't sure if her next sentence was Ana speaking, or his dream starting,

"If you could promise me that I would always come first, I could try to swallow my fears down for you."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian woke up, he was already tired, which immediately let him know that he slept too much. He never slept more than five hours a night, and every time he tried to be lazy and sleep a bit more, it resulted in his body being slow all throughout the following day.

After quickly glancing at the clock, he went to take a cold shower and do his usual morning routine, all the while thinking about his actions of the previous night. Though he was not going to lie and pretend that he did not enjoy what happened, he was still taken aback by it. In the past, he had always made a point on taking a shower before touching Ana when he came back from a dirty mission (which meant killing or torturing someone). Not that he was ashamed of what he did, but he always felt that it was a way to respect her, even if she did not know it.

But he did anything but. He took her raw, without foreplay, without gentleness, and though he knew that she enjoyed it, he still felt weird about it. Probably because it was the first time that he really lost control around Ana, or even since he was a kid. Even when he was a bit wilder in bed with her, there still was a bit of control. Even when they fought and he yelled at her, he still had a bit of control over himself that reasoned him.

That control had completely disappeared during their lovemaking of the previous night. He completely let go, not even making sure that she would be ready to take him, and this was what was making him contrite. Fortunately for him, Ana had a strong sexual appetite and she easily caught up with his mood.

Once he was downstairs, he called Jose to let him know what had happened. He would have called him earlier, but he did not want to have to censor himself because of Ryan's present. But apparently, Raymond had already told Jose everything there was to know about the affair, including the part where he killed Luke.

But unlike what he had expected, Jose did not make a big deal out of Luke's death, but rather on the reasons that lead to killing him as he did.

"Would you have killed him the same way if you weren't in a relationship with Ana?" Jose asked, backing Christian in a corner.

He knew that no matter what, he would have killed Luke for disobeying once again a direct order. But he couldn't tell for sure that he would not have done things differently if he hadn't been involved with Ana. And Jose knew it.

When he finished his conversation with Jose, he left the apartment, knowing that he still had a good hour before Ana woke up, and he went to buy something for her. He knew that this was probably going to bring him a lot of troubles from both Steele, but if this could ensure that she would be safe, he did not really care of the headaches to come.

When he came back, he took the cake out of the fridge, not remembering seeing Ana put it back in, and assuming that she did so when he was out cold after sex, and a small smile grew on his lips. What he had thought were fondant and drawings, was actually summer fruits. Mostly berries, with a few roses, sprinkled amongst them. He checked the stairs, and when he was sure that she was not around, he flicked his finger on the pink cream that covered the cake, appreciating that he could not taste the sugar in it. Ana had probably asked for a sugar-free cake when she placed the order for his cake.

With a small sigh, he let the cake out, hoping that Bastille would not come and take his own piece of it before everyone else, and he went to read the newspaper on the couch. As he was skimming through the business section, when Ana came from behind, smelling all fresh and hugged him, wishing him once again a happy birthday.

Then, she sat next to him, a bright smile on her lips, though there was a small frown between her brows. "Are you _sure_ you're okay?" She asked, making Christian lean in to kiss her and reassure her.

"Maybe you're all bummed down because you're getting old. How old are you? Seventy-five?" She joked, making Christian roll his eyes before he proposed,

"How about we eat breakfast?"

"No. I decided to portion a bit what I eat."

"You chose a poor day to do so," Christian noticed, though he wondered why on Earth she would want to go on a diet.

"I know. But I did gain a few pounds since last year …" She complained, making Christian forget about his worries for a split second and say like a goofy child,

"I know. Especially here." He squeezed her bottom, making her sit on his laps, and earning a slap on his chest as he did so.

"This is _so_ not what you're supposed to say! You're supposed to tell me that it's all in my head and that I'm still beautiful, and —"

"You are still beautiful. But I'm not going to lie to you and tell you it's all in your head. It's all on your ass, and I love it. There is more to hold on to," Christian replied with a smug smile.

He saw how Ana was trying to stay mad, but failing miserably. She ended up smiling and shaking her head, as she told him,

"Anyway, I think we can simply wait for a nice brunch. I think I cooked too much, and there is the cake," She pointed the cake getting room temperature. "I thought the baker was going to laugh at me when I told him no sugar or replacement of sugar whatsoever."

"I think you made his day by giving him some sort of challenge," He told her, earning a smile from her.

He caressed her cheek, feeling bad for what he was about to do.

"Do you remember when you asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I told you nothing."

"I do. But I didn't listen, I got you something," She replied, all smug and proud about it.

"Well, I changed my mind."

Ana pouted as she told him, "But Christian, I don't have time to go get you a new gift, your birthday is _today_."

"I know. And … I already have it. You accepting it is the present."

He pointed with his chin the coffee table behind her, and she looked at the box. "It's not how birthday gifts work, Christian," She let him know, though Christian noticed that he cheeks were flushed.

It was clear that she had an idea of what was in the box, and for a moment, Christian wondered what she expected there would be in it. He knew that she was not ready for what he bought her, she was raised to not be ready for it. He watched her kneel so she would be at the right level to open the box, and when she did, all the colours left her face, just as he expected.

"I don't want it," She hastily said, closing the box to hide the incriminating object.

With a sigh, Christian got up and went to his safe, under Ana's angry eyes. When he came back, he gave her the pictures that he had received the day before. Though it was impossible, she paled even more at the image of a target over her face.

He knew that if Raymond ever found out what he did, he was in for a major argument with his boss. Raymond had always protected Ana and created a bubble around her to keep her innocent. And Christian understood his mentor, he really did. In truth, up until the pictures appeared, he had considered doing the same to his children. But ever since the pictures showed up, Christian couldn't shake the idea that this situation would never have occurred if Ana had known more about her father's life. She would have known who Luca was, and would never have formed a friendship with him.

"These were sent to you father two nights ago as a way to threaten him. I know your father will not talk to you about them, I know he will increase your security detail and pretend that everything is alright in front of you. But … I can't. All I can think about ever since I got those photos is the fact that this photographer could have been a sniper. And I told you yesterday night, I _can't_ lose you. You mean too damn much to me for me to allow anything to happen to you.

Now, I understand that you don't like the idea of being followed everywhere you go. I _really_ do. But in that case, you need to know how to defend yourself. And a couple of self-defence classes a week with Ryan won't help you all the time. Whereas the gun …"

"I'm not taking the gun, Christian," She snapped, her eyes filled with tears, but refused to shed them.

He looked at her as her eyes were still on the pictures, and finally, she tore her gaze away from them to stare at Christian, concern in her eyes.

"Christian … you do know that … Luca is just a friend, right?"

"Of course I know that," He assured her, though he had to admit that hearing her say those words did appease a tension he was not even aware of. "I already told you, I trust you, Ana. What I don't trust is other people's intentions concerning you."

She shook her head, turning over the pictures so she wouldn't have to look at them anymore. "I don't care how Luca see things, he is just my friend, and I will never take it further. I'm with you."

As she said those words, Christian reminisced about what Andrea said concerning his son and Raymond's daughter. He was persuaded that they would end up together. Perhaps this idea planted in his head because Luca was persuaded of the same thing. He had planned to play with Ana and ultimately fell in his own trap.

This made him see Luca's final moments in a whole different way. Luca had looked disappointed when Christian told him that he was with Ana, and now, Christian understood that it was the strategist that was feeling disappointment, but simply the man.

"It's not just Luca, Ana. Your father is a powerful man, and people will not hesitate to use you to get to him. Especially if you're tiny and gullible."

She glared at him, not appreciating the names, before she retorted, "I'm not _that_ stupid, Christian. I just like to look the other way. And I can take care of myself plenty. Being small doesn't mean that I can't defend myself, look at David and Goliath!"** 💚 (Check at the end)**

For a moment, Christian was lost, not sure who were those two men. But then, a recollection of his Sunday classes with one of his families came back to him, and once he understood the biblical reference, he reopened the box, and took the gun out of it to put it in Ana's hands, using Ana's faith in his advantage,

"Then, be David. Use the stone"

She shook her head, her tears finally roaming free on her face as she tried to let go of the gun. Christian forced her to hold on to it, as he explained, "I'm going to get Ryan to teach you how to use it properly, and don't try to squirm your way out of it. Ryan isn't Luke."

"I don't want to use a gun."

"And I don't want you to die. We're going to have a problem here."

She busted in tears, but he stayed inflexible, not letting go of her hand. He was not going to receive any more pictures of the sort. He would rather shatter a piece of Ana's innocence than have to learn that she died because she had been too naive.

Ana sobbed next to him, refusing to look at the gun in her hands as she admitted, "If I accept this gun, I have to accept all those things I pretended not to know all over those years."

Christian frowned, looking deep into her eyes, though his hand was still firmly forcing her to hold the gun. "Such as?"

She sniffled, and for the first time, Christian saw fear in her eyes, hitting him in the stomach with the force of a bull. He immediately let go of her hand, but understood her feeling of fright when she said between two hiccups,

"I'll have to accept who you really are. _What_ you really here. What Dad really is. I don't want to face that."

He knew that he should say some sweet words to her, and try to ease the idea into her, but he did not go in that direction. He knew himself, if he let himself soften just a bit, he would give in to her, and he couldn't afford to be like that.

"I already told you, Ana. Like isn't sweet or fair, no matter how hard your father tries to make you believe so."

Once again, she busted into tears, but this time, Christian took her in his arms, shushing her to calm herself. She cried for such a long time that Christian lost all notion of it. finally, she stopped herself, and asked, not even daring look at him in the eyes,

"If you're _that_ kind of criminal, it means you can kill me when you'll get bored of me, or when I'll do something that will make you mad again."

"Don't be ridiculous," Christian dismissed, not believing that Ana could think such things about him. He knew he was cold, but Ana saw a side of him that no one ever got to see.

"You say that now, but you don't know what you'll do when I'll —"

He took her chin between his fingers, forcing her to look at him, as he asked with sincerity and authority, "Do you _really_ think I could ever hurt you?"

She searched his eyes, before admitting with a bit of shame, "No. But I think you could hurt others over me and not care about it."

Christian did not respond anything to that, because he was not going to lie to the woman he loved. She suspiciously narrowed her eyes at him.

"Did you?"

"What?"

"Hurt someone over me?"

"Are you sure you want the answer?" He asked, given her an opportunity to stay in that world she was so afraid to leave. She thought about it, obviously weighing the pros and the cons to know so much about Christian, but then she affirmatively answered, and so Christian nonchalantly said,

"Yes."

Though she had been expecting this answer, Christian could clearly see that a part of her had hoped for the opposite answer, and though he couldn't even think of lying to Ana, a part of him wondered if he shouldn't have sugar coated it. He watched her look down on her knees, before she promptly got up, straightening her little black dress and telling him,

"I'll take the guns, and take the lessons without complaining. But on one condition. Don't tell Dad about me knowing. I don't want to lose the life he gave me. I want him to treat me the same. I want to keep my Dad the way he is."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So I am curious about how you feel about Christian after this chapter? And … did anyone think it would be a ring? Just curious?**

💚**David and Goliath is an event that happens in the Bible. Briefly, David is really small, and Goliath is a giant brute. Each represented their kingdom/village (according to the translations) and they fought. David killed Goliath with a swing of his sling, proving that brains overcome muscles. I am not questioning your intelligence, or culture by telling you that, I just know that not everyone has read the bible, and not everyone lives in a religious country. Better safe than sorry.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚** So what did you think of Christian's and Jodan's conversation? Who do you side with?**

**💚 What do you think of Christian's comportment with Ana concerning this whole gun thing? And his decision to let her know about the pictures and his life. **

**💚 What do you think of Christian saying that Ana is his one? Did you swoon, or did you roll your eyes?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	51. Chapter 50: The Life Of Bastille

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 50****: The Life Of Bastille (1,3K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls ... **

💚** So, I know this is a very short chapter, but I also know that many of you wanted this chapter. All I have to say is, pay real attention to how people are attached to other people since there are no names in this chapter.**

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**Bastille's PoV **

Bastille was lazily laying on the roof, taking in the sun and feeling himself drift to sleep when a drop of water unruly made his way on his fur. He snapped his eyes open, jumping on his paws, before lifting his head up and glaring at the sky with its greying clouds. He tried to see if he could risk staying longer, but the odour of the air convinced him that it would be a wise decision to go back inside.

Just a few moments after he had slipped inside, he watched the heavy rain fall down through a window, glaring at the water that disturbed his sleep. To think he could still be enjoying the sun. With nonchalance, he stuck his tongue out and cleaned himself, wondering where his human could be.

He knew that he was lucky. When he was born, his mother had told him and his siblings of the human she used to be with before ending up in a shelter, which was why he always behaved. She had told them that her human would throw shoes at her and that he would never let her out, while Bastille could come and go out of the place as he pleased. Sure there wasn't much to explore since they lived so far up in the sky, but still, he wasn't trapped in a place.

His human was actually nice, even though Bastille liked better his human's human. She took better care of him. Not that his human ever kicked him, or refused to feed him, but the female human always petted him without Bastille having to ask for it, which his human never did. Bastille always had to remind him that he should be scratched and caressed, but he took it as his human simply being slow.

Still, he liked his human. As he said, he was nice. He even praised his first kill, which his human's human did not appreciate. Bastille had come accustomed to his human sometimes coming home smelling of fresh blood. So, one day, Bastille went to the nest he had been spying on for a few days and killed the bird. He proudly brought his kill to his human, making the female jump on the couch and screech, irritating Bastille's delicate ears. His human laughed at the female, and tapped Bastille's head, congratulating him on his kill, and letting him eat the bird in peace.

There was also the one time his human brought him to the butcher. The place smelled like death and despair. There were many animals there, dogs, guinea pigs, and even stupid fish, and the human in charge of the place touched Bastille all over the place. At some point, the human in white asked if he should cut Bastille, to which his human refused, so Bastille was grateful. He wasn't sure what it meant, but he knew it was bad news.

He turned his head when he heard noises behind the front door. He knew it was his human, he could smell him, so he happily went to the door, and purred when his human briefly caressed his head. The human was definitely slow, always thinking that a quick pet was enough. Still, Bastille followed his human upstairs, wondering if his human's human was on her way for them to mate. His human smelt of this special scent he would have when he was about to mate with the female human.

In all honesty, it wouldn't surprise Bastille if the humans mated, they liked to do that a lot, though Bastille never understood why they almost always did it out of order. When he was still at the shelter, he saw a couple of dogs and rabbits going at it, and the humans did not always follow the normal pattern. Sometimes, they would go as far as cleaning each other, while mating. How many times did he see his human lick the female before mating with her … out of order? But Bastille didn't think much of it, they were humans, there were not much to be expected of them.

He jumped on the bed, taking his place in the middle of it, and sat while watching his human pull a bag from the closet, which annoyed him. According to this bag, his human was leaving for a long trip. When his human left for only a day or two, he used a smaller bag. But the bigger bag meant a long trip, and so it meant for Bastille that the other female human would come.

He had to admit that she smelt nice, but he didn't like that she would come snooping around when his human wasn't here, to begin with. She even called out for him several times, probably thinking that he was some stupid dog that immediately ran to people when he was summoned. But if he could give one quality to this female human, was that she had the common sense to always leave him food and water, and even clean his litter. Bastille was a very clean cat who liked his litter taken care of daily. So he appreciated that this female human (though an intruder), cleaned his litter, unlike the other human who came once when his human wasn't here.

It was shortly after his human left for a very very long period, and Bastille straight up did not like that human. The human came upstairs, in his human's bedroom, looking through his human's stuff! At least the female intruder had the decency to always stay downstairs. The only thing that stopped Bastille from scratching that nasty human's face, was that he smelled like his human's human. This human clearly did not know where his place was, unlike the female intruder, because he didn't even leave Bastille food, or clean his litter.

The two intruders came back a few times while Bastille's human was here, but Bastille always avoided them. He did not want to scratch them for being phoney, and to end up at the shelter. Especially since they never mentioned the fact that they came into his human's place while he wasn't there.

His human was talking at the phone, his bag full, and a smile on his face, but Bastille did not care much for that. His human always smiled when he was talking to his own human, so it meant she would probably come before he left. Bastille hoped so, like that, there would be no intruders. He jumped out of the bed, and followed his human downstairs, rubbing his leg when the human sat on the couch, and asking to be petted. His human lifted him up, and scratched him in his favourite place, just behind the ear, and so Bastille slowly caught up on the sleep he had been interrupted of earlier.

He was awakened a few moments later by his human lifting him to put him on the couch, and Bastille glared at the indecent human. Twice in one day, his precious sleep had been interrupted by unimportant things. Whatever his human wanted to do, he could have waited for him to finish sleeping. He watched the human take his bag and leave through the front door.

He waited a few moments to see if he would come back, but when his human didn't, he made his way back upstairs, his head high and he snuggled in the middle of his human's pillow. This was his favourite place in the whole place because it smelt of a mix of his human, and his human's human.

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**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So I am curious about how you feel about this chapter, because, don't deny it, we all love some Bastille. And I know that this chapter might seem filler, but if you pay attention, you understand why it isn't.**

**💚 What do you think of Bastille's thoughts concerning Christian and Ana? Especially when they do 'things out of order'?**

**💚 What do you think of Bastille's feelings toward the intruders?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part?****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	52. Chapter 51: The New Recruit

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 51****: The New Recruit (6,4K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls ... **

💚** So, before you read, I have a few things to say!**

💚 **About, last chapter. You guys LOVED that whole Bastille point-of-view! I am shocked. I didn't know that he had so many fans. We should create a Bastille club, haha. I told you that you need to read it thoroughly because we didn't have any names. But to make things clear about all that **

**Bastille's human: Christian **

**Bastille's human's human: Ana **

**The female intruder who cleans and feeds: Mia **

**The male intruder who went upstairs and snooped around:?**

💚** Also, also, Guys! When I put an author's note, it's not for the sake of it. Don't be asking questions that are actually answered in the note … it makes me feel like I'm wasting my time warning you and all. I know that AN can be annoying, but this is my way to interact with you, and let you know when I will be late, or out of it, or not answering. So yeah, read the AN**

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**Christian's PoV **

It was Ana's and his last day in Kenya, and like every time they would go somewhere, a part of Christian wished it wouldn't have to end. When he went back to Raymond the day after his birthday, his boss announced to him that he was sending his daughter away for good measures. She had always wanted to do a safari, and so Raymond had granted her her wish, sending Christian along with her as her usual backup. Which in a way Christian found odd.

He understood that Raymond would want to make sure that his security had been upped before allowing his daughter to wander around, but he did not know how he felt about being sent as well. He knew it was because Raymond trusted Christian to take care of his precious girl and make sure nothing would happen to her, but he had expected him to make an exception and send several of his men with Ana to Kenya, so Christian could stay behind and make sure that the security was top-notched.

But in all honesty, though he was taken aback by this move from his boss, Christian was far from complaining. He got to spend a week with Ana and only her, caring only about her from dawn to dusk, and worshipping her body all night long. Ever since he first left for Japan with her, Christian never really unplugged from work, it had always been an afterthought, and he always stayed in touch through emails and text messages.

Still, on this impromptu trip with Ana, he cared very little about what happened to Idris. Those seven days had been all about Ana, and only about her. A part of him was sure that this was due to the still fresh realisation that she could have died, the very same part that had been tempted all week long to steal Ana away from Raymond and start a new life with her.

In fact, he had entertained the idea for a very long time, sure that he could offer Ana a life where she wouldn't be targeted because of who her father was, or because of who _he_ was. They would have settled wherever she would have wanted, and within a year or two, Christian would have been back on his feet, enough to support Ana and the life they would make for themselves.

But every time he started to get in over his head, he reminded of himself of two painful truths. The first one being that Raymond would find them, no matter where they would hide. Raymond was not a man known to easily give up, and him stealing his sweet little girl away would definitely give the man the motivations to look for him all around the world. The second, and most important to Christian, Ana would never leave her father behind. She loved Raymond too much to start a new life without him. And this was why he simply appreciated those seven days with the woman he loved.

On their third day, after a safari during which Ana was wonderstruck by the possibility to pet a giraffe, Christian bought her a replica of the long-necked animal so she could add it to her charm bracelet. He had noticed that, though she did not wear the bracelet on a daily basis, the necklace only left her neck when she would go to bed.

Ana took many pictures of their trips, which Christian found odd as usual. He did not see the point of having pictures if they were not going to be public. But Ana still insisted on the matter. In fact, Christian felt that she was a bit less wary of them when they were in the public eye. But then again, she probably thought that being abroad meant that she was far enough from her father's eye, though Christian knew better. Still, he did not care much, anymore. If Raymond were to know, there was nothing Christian could really say. He loved Ana, and that was that.

In fact, though he did not talk to Ana about it, he had thought a few times about what she had told him when he was half asleep. And this was a question he could not give a straight answer to. To whom his loyalty would go first? Were Raymond order him to stop seeing Ana, would he follow suit, or would he defy his boss? His heart kept telling him that he would ultimately choose Ana over Raymond, because she was his future, and though Raymond was his past and present, he couldn't outweigh the woman he loved. But his brain sang a whole different song. _He didn't know_. This was the truth. Until he would be in that situation, he wouldn't be able to know.

It was one of those cases when one needed to be in the situation to know what they would do. How many people have sworn that they would never kill anyone, and ended up killing because someone they loved had been hurt? How many people were pro-abortion and still kept the baby when the time came? How many people never imagined hitting their significant other, and did the unthinkable in a fit of anger?

The truth was, he didn't know, no matter how much his heart was telling him that he would side with Ana, he knew he wouldn't be able to promise her that. And he knew that she was all she wanted to hear for them to be out of the closet. It was that one thing she demanded of him, and it was the one thing he couldn't give her. He could tell her that yes, she would come first, but he would feel like lying, and he never upfront lied to her. He eluded and omitted some truths, but he never lied straight to her face, and he wasn't planning to start.

Which was actually the reason why he and she were eating their last meal from room service, instead of going in some face restaurant, just like she had planned in the beginning. Now that they were about to go back to New York, Christian had to let Ana on his plan concerning Andrea, and he knew that no matter his honesty, she wouldn't like it. To be fair, were the roles reversed, he probably wouldn't have liked it either.

As they had been cut from the rest of the world, Ana still did not know of Luca's untimely demise. Christian saw in one of his morning papers that it had been mentioned briefly in the press, but Ana never bothered to read the news. She would probably learn about his death when they would get back to the US, and Christian knew that she would never suspect him. The press mentioned that he died of asthma, and though he loved her, Christian knew that Ana was naive enough to believe that. Of course, if she were to ever ask him, he wouldn't lie, but he doubted she would. This was one of Ana's biggest quality, and biggest flaw, she saw the good in everyone, he included.

"Babe," He gently said, making her look up from her phone and stare at him. He could tell that she was still upset about having room service. He softly smiled to her, and let her know,

"I should … warn you about what will happen when we get back." She frowned, not understanding where this conversation was going. He took a deep breath through his nose, and asked,

"Do you know who sent those pictures to your father?"

She made a face, clearly not happy with where Christian was taking the conversation. Though Christian made it clear back in New York that her father and he were men that made their own law, she also made it clear that the less she knew, the better she was about it. She wouldn't stop Christian from making her take shooting lessons, or from talking to her about his work life, but she would never ask on her own about it.

"I don't really care."

"You don't care to know who put a target over your face?" He asked with a blank voice, not believing his ears. He could understand that she wasn't really eager to know all about his illicit activities, he could understand that she wanted to distance herself as much as possible from this part of his life, but this was _her_ life that had been endangered. How could she not care about a threat directly put on her life?

She shrugged, picking at the rest of her dessert as she explained, "It's not much that I don't care, it's just that … I don't care to know all that goes around this … _aspect of yours and Dad's life_."

"It was Andrea Mazarati," Christian announced, not even trying to manage Ana's feeling. She could play the ostrich as much as she wanted, but he wasn't going to let her head stay buried much longer in the sand.

Ana furrowed her brows, surprised by this revelations as she stuttered, "But … Luca is also on those pictures. All of them actually. What you're saying doesn't make sense."

Christian didn't say a word, waiting for Ana to understand by herself how much she had been played, and when she did, he saw that beside her surprise, there was a bit of self-deception. She was probably not happy with herself to have been used like that.

"You're not going to kill Luca's father, are you? I mean, I'm here, alive and healthy," She suddenly said with panic, and Christian repressed an annoyed sigh. Instead of worrying about her own safety and her own life, she was worrying all about Mazarati and what Christian might do to him.

"No, I won't kill him."

"Promise me!" She demanded, and once again he repressed a sigh.

"I promise I won't kill Andrea Mazarati," Christian swore, knowing that he did have other ways to get rid of Maserati if the worst was to come. Ways that would never directly implicate him.

He watched Ana significantly sigh in relief, which comforted him in the idea that he was not going to let her know about what happened to Luca. She was going to find that out like the rest of the world, and assume that his health got the better of him, like the rest of the world.

But that did not mean his conversation was over. "Still, I won't let it go unpunished."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you really think that I am going to let that bastard target you, and let him go scot-free?"

"You just promised me that—"

"I did, and I won't touch a hair on his head. I've always done good on my promises to you so far. But that doesn't mean that I am going to turn a blind eye to what he did," Christian said, his tone implacable.

He watched Ana pursed her lips, undoubtedly not agreeing with his way to see the world, but not eager to engage in a discussion over it. He took a deep breath, hoping that she would be understudying of his plan, and let her know,

"See, Andrea has a daughter who is slightly younger than you," He started, but Ana widely opened her eyes, accusing him with dismay,

"You're going to kill her!?"

"No, I'm not. I'm going to do to her what her brother did to you."

Christian carefully watched his girl as the meaning of his words fully impacted her brain, and he cursed when her face suddenly became void of emotions. This was something that he had noticed over the past year. Ana had learnt to keep her emotions and thoughts to herself, turning her face into an unreadable map in seconds. And he had no doubts that it was something that she picked from him.

"Why are you telling me this?" She asked with a cold voice, making Christian frown. It was obvious to him why _she_ of all people should know about his plan of revenge.

"Because you're my girlfriend, and I don't want you to misinterpret what is going to happen between her and I. I will toy with her the same way Luca tried to toy with you. And I will let her father know in due time when it will be too late for him to do anting about it."

"I thought we were exclusive," She reminded him, and though she was trying to keep her voice even, Christian still heard a small waver in her tone. He got up from his chair and went to crouch next to Ana, cupping her face with his left hand as he assured her,

"We are."

"And yet, you're here telling me that you're going to screw Luca's sister," She hissed, jerking his hand away and snapping her head so they wouldn't be face to face anymore.

She was pissed, and though Christian had always liked the jealous side of Ana, this time around, he found nothing appealing to it. He couldn't fathom the fact that she thought he could so loosely go and see other girls. Did she think so little of him, to think that he would cheat on her, and even have the insolence to let her know before it even happened?"

"I won't _screw her_. I'll screw with her father's mind and heart. It's not the same thing, babe," he told her in a reassuring voice, hoping that she would understand that, no matter his needs for the job, he wouldn't go as far as to be that kind of man.

She humphed, crossing her arms over her chest, and a wild thought came to Christian's mind that he shouldn't have let her know about his plans after all. But … this wasn't the type of relationship he wanted with Ana. They already shared a secret, he did not want to have secrets from one another.

"I could have done it, and not peep a word to you about it. I could have simply gone through the motions without letting you know beforehand. But it's not the kind of relationship that I want. It's not the kind of relationship that _we _agreed we'd have with one another. This is me being honest with you."

"Well, excuse me if I'm not head over heels at the idea of _my boyfriend _getting all chummy chubby with _Suzannah Mazarati_! I don't think I'm overreacting here, Christian! You're my boyfriend, and I don't like the idea of your lips, or your monster cock being on anyone else but me!"

This made Christian frown, and look at Ana with a different eye. "Did _you_ kiss Luca Mazarati?" He asked, concerned that the answer he would hear might not be the one he wanted.

"Of course not!" Ana cried out, offended that he would even ask that question. He gave her a small smile, taking her chin between two of his fingers and forcing her to look at him,

"Then why do you assume that I am going to kiss anyone but you?"

"You just said that—"

"That I would do to her what has been done to you. I have no intentions of touching the girl. You are the only person I have eyes for. I just want … What does the Old Testament say? It's an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth."

He saw the slight relief in Ana's eye when he assured her that she was the only girl for him, and briefly kissed her lips, keeping for himself that he was hoping to do what Luca failed to do. Luca had wanted Ana to fall in love with him in order to torture Raymond's heart, and this was exactly what Christian intended to do with little Suzannah Mazarati. He knew that no matter how well he could explain this to Ana, she wouldn't understand why Suzannah had to be the one to pay for her father's sins.

Still, Christian started to see that Ana's issue was more the girl in question, than what Christian wanted to do. Though she held nothing to Ana in Christian's eyes, Suzannah was a beautiful girl. She was an auburn with captivating green eyes and a very generous cleavage, despite the fact that she still hadn't reached her twenties. Which was why Christian was barely surprised by Ana next sentence.

"So what? You want my blessing to flirt with someone else?" She asked her tone still a little snappy. Christian shook his head,

"No. I want you to understand why I have to do it."

"Technically, you don't have to do anything. I'm _right here_, with you. I'm okay, I'm alive, I'm kicking," She argued, unknowingly stirring back up the anger that Christian tried so hard to swallow since the pictures had been given to him.

"You could have been killed," He hissed through his teeth, narrowing his eyes at Ana. How could she not understand how lucky she had been that Mazarati only wanted to threaten Raymond.

"But I wasn't. I could get run over by a bus, that doesn't mean you need to go hunt down every poor bus driver there is," Ana argued, being once again the advocate of the people who tried to use her a political pawn.

Christian took a deep breath through his nose, closing his eyes, and when he opened them again, he told the woman he loved so much, "I am not overreacting here, Ana. I just want Andrea to feel what your father felt. To feel what _I _felt. I want him to know what it's like to see a picture of the person who means the world to you, a target drown on her face. I want him to understand how it feels to feel that there is a part of her life you knew nothing about. I want him to feel the dread of maybe losing that person."

Ana looked deeply into his eyes, and finally, her face softened.

"No matter what I say, you're still going to do it," She assessed, and when Christian positively answered to that, she compromised, "In that case, every time you see Suzannah, you have to see me afterwards. _No exceptions, and non-negotiable._"

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**Christian's PoV**

The very same night Christian came back from Nairobi, Raymond paid him a visit so they could go over who would take Luke's place to watch over Ana. Christian was surprised that Raymond never even tried to put the blame on him for pushing Luke in that direction when the young Hispanic had wanted to stick to IT after the unfortunate encounter that lost him his lung.

Christian had been the one who convinced Raymond to put Luke on Ana's tail, and so, in Christian's mind, Luke's failure was ultimately his own, for having put faith in a man who disregarded his direct orders not once, but several times. And still, Raymond had not peeped a word about it, making Christian wonder if the boss estimated that him having to kill his friend was punishment enough.

He barely had time to put his bag down and greet his cat, that Raymond was already ringing at the door, making the kitten bolt upstairs, which wasn't really out of the ordinary. Expect for Ana and Jose, Bastille rarely stayed downstairs when Christian had company over.

He let his boss in his apartment and filled him in about the recruit. Sergeant Ackles, fresh out of the army with perfect records concerning the skill of filature, sniping or hand to hand combat. The only thing that he left out of this quick sum-up was that Sergent Ackles was a girl.

Though Raymond deeply respected Elena and her opinion, Christian couldn't help but have noticed that there were very little (to none) women amongst the ranks of Idris. Raymond had no problem rescuing and helping women in need, and it seemed to Christian that he had a little more issues about trusting them. Another example of Raymond clear differentiation between girls and boys was the fact that he had trained his son to take over, all the while keeping his daughter oblivious to everything. Still, Christian couldn't tell if it was because Raymond was from a past generation where the underground was a world of men, or if it was simply the way Raymond saw the world.

Raymond let Christian know of what happened while he was in Kenya, catching him up about everything he needed to know, and then he inquired about the trip, though this time was different of the other times. Instead of asking about his daughter, he simply asked about Christian and his state of mind, which made Christian frown at him, unused of this kind of display.

"You just seemed a bit tensed before leaving," Raymond mindlessly said, sipping on his water, before grimacing at the liquid, obviously wishing for something stronger and browner.

Christian did not comment on that, but now understood why he did not send an army with Ana on her trip, and simply him. It was more than a simple question of trust, it was a way for Raymond to give Christian some time to 'cool-off'. Christian tried to picture what he might have looked like after the whole picture debacle, but all he could see was the madman Ryan described him. Which was probably why Raymond thought that he had been 'tensed'. If only his boss knew that the only worry on Christian's mind lately was the safety of his girl, who happened to be his boss's daughter.

An hour after Raymond arrived, Ryan came in with Lauren Ackles, and Christian carefully studied his boss's reaction to the newcomer. Raymond did not say a word and let the girl pitch her performances, but Christian could tell by the way Raymond was holding his glass that the older man was not very pleased with this new recruitment. Which was why Christian estimated that it was time for him to fend for his pick,

"She won't let Ana out of sight."

Raymond did not answer but finally tore his gaze away from the girl with light brown curls to stare at Christian. The copper-haired man saw conflict in his mentor's eyes as if the older man was internally debating on what he was about to say to Christian. Which Christian did not like, Raymond had never hesitated to speak his mind to Christian before. But instead of lingering on that, he kept on selling his pick,

"Ana will never be able to get rid of her. Lauren is well trained, and she can follow you daughter everywhere, including the bathroom."

And this was when Raymond ticked, making Christian repress himself from rolling his eyes. He glanced at Ryan and Lauren who were watching the one-sided discussion, and though Ryan did not say anything, Christian knew that he was siding with him. After all, they had picked Lauren together.

"It's the twenty-first century, Raymond. You have to live with your time," Christian calmly said, doing his best to not sound condescending.

Ryan narrowed his eyes in his direction, probably feeling self-conscious about this blunt exchange between Christian and Raymond, and so Christian came up with an idea,

"Would it reassure you if she beat Ryan up?"

"_What_?! I do not agree with that! Why not beat your ass?!" Ryan cried out, making Christian smirk to himself. The two of them had been able to see a few of Lauren's training videos, and though they were both very good at hand to hand combat, neither of them wanted to find out if she could beat them to the ground. No matter how much he was for equality between genders, Christian knew that his ego would be bruised if Lauren beat him up.

"You know that I'm right here in the room with you?" Lauren inquired, with a bit of sass. This was something that Christian had noticed when he interviewed her. Lauren did not beat around the bush. Maybe it was because she came from a world of men, or maybe it was because she was from the South, but she still spoke her mind, and this was a quality that Christian appreciated. He would rather have a subordinate with a smart mouth, but who followed orders, than one who never said anything and did as pleased.

"Why did you leave the military?" Raymond asked, and Christian finally understood the issue his boss had with the girl. It had nothing to do with her gender, but more to do with her background. But then again, Christian already had the answer t that.

"Well, apparently, no matter where you are, if your genitals are inside of you, it gives any dufus with a penis the right to force themselves on you. And when you complain about it to your superiors, they get the nerves to tell you that you're a lying whore that should think twice before accusing her ranking officer," Lauren complained, with passion, clenching her fists on her sides. The topic was still fresh and sore for her.

"So you swore off the military all at once?" Raymond asked, surprising Christian in his lack of compassion for the girl.

"Yes. Though I did not have a choice. I was informed that it would be better if I resigned, and I did. I care very little about people doubting my words, or my capacities," She added, narrowing her eyes at Raymond who did not seem the slightest contrite by her blatant accusation.

"I know who you are, Mr Steele, and I know _exactly_ where I'm getting if I take this job. But the pay is good, and no offence to your daughter, following around a twenty years old debutante is hardly something out of my reach."

"And what if she asks you to back off? Anastasia can be really convincing when she wants something," Raymond argued, holding Lauren's gaze to him. The young woman shrugged, not taken aback as she countered,

"Then I will back off. She doesn't need to see me for me to keep an eye on her. As Mr Grey told you earlier, I am trained to tail people and I was a sniper. It was my job to see but not be seen."

Raymond looked at the girl from head to toe, before placidly saying, "You don't need my approval, Christian. If you think she's good, she's good."

"It's your daughter," Christian argued, still bitterly remembering that he had estimated Luke good enough, and had ended up regretting his decision.

"I know. And I know that you also know that," Raymond mindlessly said, before turning to Christian with a vicious grin, "And we both know that if something happens to her, _you_ will be the one regretting every decision you made about her safety."

Christian nodded, keeping for himself that Raymond was more right than he could ever imagine. Before recruiting Lauren, he had been actually considering hiring two people around the clock, but Ryan advised him against it, arguing that they should have this kind of security for when 'shit would really get down'.

So on this note, having the final word, Christian dismissed Lauren, asking Ryan to take her to headquarters and get Jose to fill her in about Ana's schedule and habits. Strangely, Raymond stayed behind, though Christian had been expecting for him to tag along Ryan and Lauren to make sure she would know everything there was to know about his precious daughter.

The two men stared at one another for a few seconds, before Raymond said, as if nothing, "Ana came back from Kenya with some funny ideas … she wants to take shooting lessons."

"She should," Christian immediately shot back. It hadn't expected Ana to keep this huge thing from her father, but he had to say that he was surprised by how she let her father know about her latest 'hobby'. The way Raymond said it, it seemed that it was simply a whim that came out from one of her travels, instead of her boyfriend demanding of her to be prepared at all time.

Raymond narrowed his eyes at Christian, his tight lips clearly disagreeing with Christian's statement, and having an issue that the blond boy did not side with him. Which was why Christian came clean about the whole idea,

"I may, or may not have implied that knowing how to use a gun is always a useful skill to have."

"Ana should have to hold a gun," Raymond snapped, his fist tightening at his side, and his eyes shooting daggers at Christian.

"With all due respect, she should. She is your daughter, and you can't expect the world to treat her with the same deference that you do."

"No apparently not," Raymond snarled, making Christian frown, his guard up.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Would you have treated Ana with the same respect that I do, she never would have come back with that ludicrous idea!"

This wasn't the first time that Raymond was losing his temper over his daughter, this was actually the only thing he was known to lose his temper over. But still, this was the first time that Raymond was losing his temper against Christian. And though it felt weird to Christian to be the target of Raymond's anger, he was not letting himself be impressed by the man. He was not going to back away on that matter. And this was why he coldly retorted,

"I don't have to respect her the way you do. _She is not my daughter_."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

It had been three weeks since Lauren had started tailing Ana, and three weeks since Christian and Raymond had their slight disagreement. Of course, since the shooting idea officially came from Ana, Raymond did not oppose it and asked Ryan himself to add shooting lessons to the regular self-defence lessons. still, Christian felt that this argument put a cold between Raymond and him. Not that their working relationship suffered from it, but the thin line that made people think of him as Raymond's surrogate son seemed to barely exist anymore.

Still, Christian was in no way considering apologising, or try to appease his boss's feelings. To him, Ana learning to hold a gun was something Raymond should have taught her when she was still young and learning about calculus. He couldn't pretend to run a kingpin and not prepare his daughter for the worst. The world did not work like that, and Raymond better than anyone knew it.

On a plus side, things had been going very well between Ana and him. He had been actually surprised to discover that Ana liked shooting after all. She could gush for hours about the adrenaline rush or the feeling of power that holding a weapon gave her. She would even joke that Christian would now better beware since she could shoot him and that they both knew that her father would do anything to keep her out of jail.

He also had been seeing Suzannah for the past three weeks, and as promised, he always saw Ana the same day. Christian felt a bit weird about Ana's need to know how each 'date' wnt, but still satisfied her curiosity, before satisfying her appetite. And though he did not appreciate his moments with the young Mazarati for a second, some good still came out of it. They made Christian love Ana even more.

The more time he spent with the girl, laughing at her jokes or pretending to be interested in her life, the more he realised that Ana was the person he wanted to spend his life with. He wanted her to be his wife, he wanted her to mother his children, he wanted to grow old beside her and make love to her each night that would pass by.

But in all honesty, he had grown comfortable to be in this state where they were. Sure there were things that he couldn't do like simply take Ana out to grab a bite at Mrs Parvati, but he liked that Ana was his, and his only, and that each moment he spent with her, he did not have to worry about having someone else intervene. Each of those moments was so precious that the two of them always made sure to make the most of them. And there was also the fact that he did not have to worry about someone targeting Ana to get to him.

He had contacted Jason Taylor to apologise for that unnecessary threatening message, as well as to know if anyone but him knew about his relationship with the brunette, and so far, they all came short. Taylor knew, as well as Jose, and Katherine, and that was it. Mia knew he had someone, just like Ryan. And Christian still wasn't sure about Raymond. If his boss knew, it did not look like him to not say anything. Raymond was not known to be someone who bit his bone, and whether it was as Ana father, or as Christian's boss, it seemed very unlikely for him not to say a word about that ordeal.

Christian was lost in his thoughts, reading the paper with Bastille nestled on his laps, when someone rang at his door. He smiled to himself, hoping that it was Ana coming to surprise him, but kept his face closed when it saw that it was Lauren.

So far, the young girl did as told, and followed Ana. Not even two days after being introduced to the brunette, Lauren sent a text to Christian, letting him know that Ana indeed asked her to back off, offering a deal about 'not getting into troubles, and contacting Lauren if needed'. So Lauren took a step back and simply followed the girl from afar like she said she would.

"I'm not interrupting, am I?"

Christian shook his head, and let the girl in his apartment, proposing her water. She took the glass but did not drink on it, her eyes looking at the cat on the couch with suspicion.

"I did not take you for a cat person," She noted, which made Christian smile to himself, though his face remained unmoved. Mia kept making fun of him and his cat, calling him a James Bond villain, though he was quite sure that had he been a James Bond villain, the franchise would have died at the first movie. No use in monologues and convoluted deaths when you wanted a person dead.

"So … what I'm about to ask is … _wayyy_ out of line. But I have to, just for my peace of mind."

"Go ahead," he simply said, though he already had an idea of what this was about.

"Are you having an affair with Miss Steele?"

Christian repressed a smirk. Though he was caught, he still praised that the girl did her job correctly. This was the question that Luke had been supposed to ask him months ago.

"What makes you think that?" He inquired, not as if he just had been busted going behind their boss's back, but as if he was talking about the weather getting colder.

"Well, Miss Steele comes rather often to that specific building at times that do not coincides with her friend's schedules. They all have schools or jobs that made them come either after she's already here or leave before she does. And … I saw you sneak into the mansion a few nights ago, only to stay there all night …"

Christian gave her an impressed nod, surprised to not have noticed her when he came to see Ana a few nights ago after a movie night with Suzannah. So far, he did not know of one single person who had managed to startle him, especially when it came to his very first skill.

But still, he did not bother answering her first question. The two of them stared at one another, before Lauren's shoulders visibly relaxed, as she said,

"Okay. Well, now I know."

"Now, you do," Christian repeated with his usual cold tone. He slightly tilted his head to the side, not bothered for a second by Bastille claiming his laps again, glaring at the person who disturbed their bonding, and the ex-military inquired,

"You're not asking me if I told Mr Steele?"

"Why would I need to ask you that?"

"Because you're obviously hiding your relationship. Otherwise you would have used the front door, last Thursday," She countered, making Christian raise an eyebrow at her. Did she really think he was actually _trying_ to hide his relationship? Did she think he was such an amateur? Sure he respected Ana's wish and did not come out as he had first wished, but he was far from really hiding as well. Had he been hiding, Lauren would never have found out about them, no matter how good she was.

Though he hadn't spoken a word, Lauren seemed to have understood her mistake, and bashfully looked down on her hands while Christian enunciated a truth,

"If you had told Raymond, he would have been here by Friday night, ready to reap my head off."

Lauren nodded her agreement, which made Christian slightly narrow his eyes at her. For a second, he was questioning her loyalty. "So, I am curious to know why didn't Raymond reap my head off Friday night?"

"Honestly, _you_ hired me and vouched for me. As far as I'm concerned, I answer to you. Plus, Mr Steele said he didn't want to know what his daughter did of her free time, so why should I tell him? I just have to rearrange my schedule when she comes to see you. She's certainly in no danger while she's with you."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So Christian and Raymond are in disagreement, how do you feel about that?**

**💚 What do you think of Christian's plan concerning his revenge on Andrea?**

**💚 And what do you think of Lauren and her allegiance?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	53. Chapter 52: About That One Friend

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 52****: About That One Friend (4,0K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls ...**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV **

As Jose was making sure that the food was stirring nicely in its pot, Ethan came from behind and hugged him, thanking him once again for cooking for his sister. Though Ethan was not really a great cook, he liked to pretend he was to his sister, especially after she had started her cooking lessons, and being the brother that he was, he did not want to give his sister any motives to make fun of him.

Jose had moved in with Ethan over the course of the few weeks during which everyone believed Christian to be dead. And they only became an official item a few weeks ago, while Christian was away in Kenya with Ana. And though the whole thing went very well, Jose had to admit that he would have liked better if Christian had been there afterwards to calm his nerves.

Though he had been anticipating meeting the Kavanagh (and especially Elena) as Ethan's boyfriend, he realised that he was stressing himself over nothing. Not even once Elena brought his past against him or hinted that given who he was, Ethan would be better off without him. On the contrary, she was more worried about him than about her son. Which Ethan always reminded her, pretending to be hurt by this 'lack of parental worry for him'. At the end of their first dinner, Elena gave her son a long speech about how he should take care of Jose, and not play around with him.

Elena only asked Jose a few days later if he had told Ethan about everything that happened in his life, but without really prying. Just to make sure that they were being honest and open with each other. Which was the case. Weirdly enough, Ethan never mentioned his doubts concerning his mother to either of them, and Jose had the feeling that it was because he didn't want to know after all. There was nothing he could do if he knew, and as Eamon would often say, they were truths better left unsaid.

"You know, Kate is always late," Ethan said with a sultry tone while kissing his lover's neck.

Jose shook his head with a small smile, repressing an eye roll. Ethan had just come back from a week in Sweden, visiting his little brother there, and every excuse had been good since, to get him to bed. Which he already did today, _twice_.

When he did not answer, or even gave him a sign that he should pursue, Ethan's hand started playing with Jose's belt as he let him know, "It's actually always been a fantasy of mine to do it in the kitchen. Just above the stove."

"Some other time. I don't want your sister barging in, and seeing us butt naked."

"As I said, she's always late."

Jose shook his head once again but stopped Ethan's hand to go further down his happy trail. He didn't want to get all hot and bothered for nothing. So instead, he led the conversation toward something less sensual than Ethan's dirty fantasies.

"I think we should get a dog?"

This ought to make Ethan stop and step back so he could look properly in his eyes. "Does that mean you'll get rid of your place and permanently live here?"

Though he had moved in with Ethan, Jose didn't find it in himself to sell his house. No matter how small it was, no matter the hazardous neighbourhood, no matter the bad memories, it was still the only thing that linked him to his Mom. Without this old house, he had nothing material to remember her by. And though he wasn't living there anymore, he couldn't let go of it either.

"I don't think I'll ever get rid of it, Ethan. It's … complicated to explain. I'm not keeping it because of us, but just because of what was before. But that shouldn't stop us from getting a dog."

He knew that Ethan felt that he was keeping his place as a contingency plan, in case it didn't work between them, and though he had reassured several times his man that it wasn't the case, it seemed that Ethan was never really satisfied with the answer. Which was why Jose had thought of getting a dog. It was a big step in a relationship to get a pet together, and it would reassure Ethan concerning Jose's commitment to their couple.

"We are so not getting a chihuahua. I _refuse_ to be that cliché," Ethan warned, making Jose laugh, before he added, "We should go to the shelter tomorrow. Elliott is sure to recommend us some good places."

Just as they were starting to talk about what kind of breed was out of the question, the doorbell rang, making Jose give an 'I told you so' look at Ethan before going to open the door to Kate and her husband. Ethan's sister happily jumped into her brother's arms, asking all about their younger sibling while Elliott gave Jose a bottle of red wine.

The party of four sat in the living room to have a drink before dinner and listen to Ethan marvelling about how being abroad matured their baby brother. During dinner, Kate broke the news that she and Elliott were going to Seattle after Christmas, so Elliott could do an internship there. Ethan and she joked about how Eamon was not so happy to see his daughter take off so soon after his youngest child left the nest as well.

And though Jose participated in the family fun, a part of his brain suddenly thought of Christian, and how his best cover was about to be blown up. He knew that Kate knew all about Ana and Christian, and he also knew that to Raymond, when Ana was coming to this particular building, it was to see her best friend.

**Your cover is about to disappear. Katherine is going to Seattle. You have to think of something else for when Ana's wants to come to spend the night with you. Jose **

Jose hadn't been expecting Christian to answer to him right away, thinking that his friend was probably busy with some business since he turned down his invitation to join Ethan and his family for diner. He knew that it wasn't Christian being his antisocial-self since the blond man had already done many times the effort to come and visit Ethan and him several times, or even invite them over for dinner. And Mia was supposed to join them for dessert, so Christian wouldn't have felt lost amongst couples.

But surprisingly, Christian texted Jose back right away, with an answer that had the Hispanic man worried.

**My cover has already been blown up a few days ago. Christian **

Jose considered excusing himself from his guests to call his friends concerning this alarming statement, but he simply decided that he would pay Christian a visit after Kate and Elliott would go back to their apartment. He knew that Christian was not really someone who liked talking over the phone, and whatever he was doing at the moment, he was probably not able to have a free conversation that did not require censorship from unwanted ears.

So he put his phone aside and gave back his attention to what was happening around the table. They had finished the rice and ratatouille he had made long ago and were simply waiting for Mia to arrive to have a strawberry charlotte for dessert.

Elliott gave them a few addresses of shelters he knew, recommending that they should take a cub. Of course, Kate tried to sell them the ridiculous idea of Ethan and him taking a small dog that they would be able to dress. She was already marvelling about how she knew of a cute little boutique where they could buy matching outfits for them and their dog when her brother stopped her in her fantasy to let her know that neither Jose or him wanted a small dog, nor were interested in being that much of a stereotype.

Mia saved them from Kate arguing how a small dog would be better for them, by entering the apartment shouting that she was the best in the world. But strangely, instead of jumping at Ethan's throat like she usually did, she jumped on Elliott.

Ethan and Mia had developed a friendship that arranged Jose in every sense. Because Mia was so oddly open to Ethan, Jose did not need to have any secret concerning her with Ethan. In fact, Ethan sometimes knew more than Jose. He took the habit to drop Mia to Uni and pick her up after work. They would usually spend their Friday nights together, either drinking or each working on their own stuff. And Mia tagged along Ethan a few times for the Sunday mess, along with the rest of the Kavanaghs and Ana.

In fact, it was Ethan who proposed that they gave a key to Mia so she could come and visit anytime. And many times, Jose found Ethan in Mia's couch on Saturday morning, devating the past night.

"If you weren't married, the things I'd do to you, Cohen," Mia declared, kissing his cheek, and making Elliott laugh. Both Jose and Ethan weirdly looked at this unlikely thing while Kate was all smiles, and Elliott asked,

"So, I take it that my uncle took you in?"

"He did! Though I have to admit, you were right, I did get that pervy vibe, but as soon as I reminded him who connected us, he was all professional. You have no idea of the weight you took off my shoulders," She sighed with happiness, slushing on one of the chairs with a big smile on her face.

"What's going on?" Ethan inquired.

"Mia was looking for a summer job in a law firm, and El hooked her up with his uncle working for Cohen Corp**,**" Kate explained while Jose brought the cake to the table. Mia was still beaming, telling Jose,

"We need a toast to that! I got more than a summer job. I got to work there every holiday!"

"Maybe that could lead to a job offer when you finish school," Ethan pondered, taking the vodka out of the fridge and bringing shots so they could all cheer to Mia's success. But Mia shook her head, showing her ingenious mind.

"I already have a job for when I finish school. A pretty good job offer, well paid and waiting just for me. But Uncle Isaac doesn't need to know that. He just needs to believe that I'll end up working for him, so he can teach me everything he knows about the job."

"Who already gave you a job, when you don't have the diploma, yet?" Ethan mused, and Mia mischievously smiled at him, putting her finger on her lips before raising her glass up and calling to cheers.

They all raised their glass for the toast and drank their shots before Jose cut the cake. Kate started making plans with Mia for her birthday, shortly after Christmas and before she would leave for Seattle. She wanted to make it an all-girls night with a few of her friends, maybe even go to Vegas or LA. As they start plotting the perfect birthday, Elliott and Ethan started talking about Seattle and how everything was going well in their plans to move. Jose had no doubts that Raymond probably made a few calls to make sure his Goddaughter wouldn't end up homeless, especially after Elliott admitted that their first choice of apartment, that was rather pricy, was their future home after all.

The evening dragged on, different conversations being broached, and many waves of laughter being shred, and when ten o'clock stroke, Elliott and Kate declared that they would call it a night. They left, leaving Mia with them who helped them cleaned them up while Ethan was sharing with her Jose's and his plans to adopt a dog. The two of them where deep in conversation about dog names, when Jose excused himself, perfectly knowing that he would find Mia whenever he would go back home.

He went to see Christian, hoping that he would be home, given the time, and when he first knocked to find out if Christian was home, he happily saw that t was the case.

"I'm not interrupting I hope," He asked, assuming that if his friend was home, maybe his girlfriend was as well. Christian made a face,

"You are, but it is most welcomed. I'm getting beat up like a little girl."

With that, he invited Jose in, and Jose found Ana sitting at the table, a game of chess in the making where most white pieces were gone. Christian sat in front of Ana while Ana arbored a victorious grin. She quickly nodded her head to Jose, before turning back her attention to Christian, and asking,

"So? Can I go back in killing you, now?

Christian nodded, his face unreadable, and Ana moved her knight, declaring checkmate to Christian. Jose watched his best friend make yet another face, displeasure clear on his face before he turned to him and asked,

"Care to take my place?"

"Playing against Ana? Thank you, not. I'm not fool enough to compete with a state champion, three years in a row," Jose declared, perfectly aware that Ana has been playing chess since a very young age, and that neither Christian or him had any chance of beating her. He, at least, had the excuse of not being in love with the girl, so he could refuse such a humiliation.

He watched Christian narrow his eyes at Ana, who pretended to be all innocent at this moment, and he understood that she kept that information to herself. With a smile, she got up, and kissed Christian on the cheek, as she told him,

"You guys talk whatever you have to talk about, I'll go get ready for bed."

Then, she left, leaving Jose all dumbfounded at this display of affection he just witnessed. Jose knew very well that Christian was in love with the brunette, he could actually hear it in the voice of his friend when he was talking about her. But seeing Christian interact with his girlfriend, smiling to her, and watching her take the stairs up was a whole different thing. For a moment, he even wondered if he was looking at his own lover in the same way.

Jose had always seen Christian being very private about his emotions and feelings. But those five small seconds of intimacy he witnessed completely changed the way he saw his friend. It was day and night. Christian was a different man around Ana. And it was even more noticeable when she left the room, and Christian returned immediately to his usual cold usual self, not showing a single emotion on his face.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" He asked Jose, apparently curious as to why Jose paid him this surprise visit. Jose quickly shook away his astonishment over Christian showing emotions and focused on why he came in the first place.

"What do you mean your cover has already been blown up? Does Raymond know?!"

Christian slightly snickered, shaking his head, before he got up and tidied the place as he informed his friend,

"You know, Ana isn't the most stealth person in the world. And even though she tried, she didn't manage to check Lauren off her shoulder. Lauren did her job, and her not being stupid, she put two and two together."

"Did she out you to Raymond?" Jose insisted, wanting to know why Christian was so relaxed about the whole situation. He knew that Christian wasn't the one who wanted to keep the relationship a secret. He also knew that Christian would be more than happy the day Raymond would finally know about Ana and him, no matter the consequences. But he also knew that Christian wouldn't want Raymond to know by somebody else than him. It was simply a question of principles.

"It seems that Lauren doesn't care much for Raymond," Christian revealed as he passed a cloth over the sink to remove the few droplets of water. Jose slightly narrowed his eyes, not liking the potential conflict that this new piece of information could bring. Raymond liked when his people were loyal to him and only to him. And it seemed that his latest hire, the one that was supposed to look after the person he adored, was more loyal to Christian than to him.

"Raymond's not going to like that," He noticed, making Christian snap nonchalantly,

"There are many things that Raymond doesn't like lately."

Jose widely opened his eyes, slightly taken aback by the slightly bitter tone in his friend's voice. Christian sat with him on the sofa, and explained,

"He resents me for giving to Ana the idea of holding a gun."

"_What_? Since when?"

"Since the pictures."

"How come I didn't know about that?" He was surprised that he never even heard of the brunette taking shooting lessons. He knew that he wasn't close to her, but still, this seemed a rather important change in her life for him to surely hear about it. Wether from someone in Idris, whether by their common friends.

"Not many people know about it. With you, that must be five. Raymond isn't very keen on having his daughter holding a gun, and he's even less keen on letting people know about it."

"Wait a minute? How did you justify to Raymond that _you_ convinced Ana to hold a gun?"

Christian shrugged. "I just told him that I was the one who suggested the idea to her that she shouldn't be that defenceless in the streets of New York. She's the one who told her father she wanted to shoot."

Jose nodded, still in shock over this news. Though he couldn't go as far as saying that he was friends with Ana, he knew her well enough to know that she was a peaceful soul. She was the kind of girl who would probably chain herself to a tree to save it. He never pictured her as someone who would take a gun, and he had not doubted that Christian had to argue a lot in order for her to agree to this.

He got up, realising that the purpose of his visit was void and that Christian probably wanted nothing more than to go upstairs to his girl. Still, he asked,

"What are you going to do when Kate leaves?"

"That's Ana's problem to figure out. Though I don't think she's thinking of the consequences of her friend's departure. She's only ranting on how sad she is to see her go, even if she never tells her that."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jose's PoV**

Jose and Ethan arrived at a restaurant that Ethan had wanted to take Jose to for months. It was apparently a very good Jamaican restaurant that had been recommended to him his Chef several times. But as soon as they entered the building, Jose saw something disturbing a few tables over.

Christian was sitting there, all smiles for a young auburn brunette who was giggling as he was telling her something. He narrowed a little his eyes and recognised the girl as Suzannah, the youngest daughter of Andrea Mazarati. This was all wrong and could start a war, but before jumping to a conclusion, he knew that he should talk to Christian about it.

Unfortunately, he did not consider that Ethan was not as discreet as him. Before he could do anything, his partner was hailing over to both Suzannah and Christian, all smiles, and dragging the two of them over to the table where the couple was seated.

"Fancy seeing you here! I never thought that I'd see any of you in a restaurant that serves that type of food," Ethan declared, unknowingly reminding Jose, that both Suzannah and Ethan were socialites that evolved in the same circles. Even though they almost had a ten years gap between the two of them, they were bound to know each other.

Suzannah smiled, getting up to kiss Ethan, and he decided to make the presentation, "Jose, this is Su—"

"Suzannah Mazarati. I've heard about you," Jose cut, very briefly glancing at Christian. It wasn't much to cut Ethan in his introduction, but more to let Christian know that he was on to him and that he was going to grill him later on for that.

What he didn't expect, was Suzannah's reaction. "Awww, you've talked about me?" She _gushed_ at Christian, making him fondly smile to her as he responded with a sweet voice that seemed so foreign in his mouth,

"Of course I did. Why wouldn't I talk about you?"

This surprised even Ethan, who had always known Christian as being someone cold. He actually often teased Jose about that, telling him that he chose a robot for a best friend. He glanced at Jose, trying to see if it was unusual for him as well, but Jose played along and simply smiled, as he said,

"Well, we'll leave you to it, and get to our table. I'll see you tonight, Christian."

"I'm off to Washington. I'll text you later on," Christian reminded him, his eyes briefly meeting his so they both knew that this would be discussed over by text. Though Jose was sure as Hell not going to wait for a later on.

He and Ethan went to their assigned table, Ethan still stunned by their walk-in, "So Christian is dating Suzannah. This is going to be problematic."

Jose furrowed his brows, just realising at this moment that there was something even more problematic. So far, he only saw the issue of Christian being with an enemy of Raymond, even if it was just by default. But … _Christian was currently dating Ana_! And though he feared the wrath of Raymond, he didn't want to unleash Ana's ire. There was a saying about the most peaceful people having the most powerful fury and Christian was putting himself in a position where he could only lose, no matter the perspective.

He took his phone out while telling his lover, "It is going to be problematic. Still, would it be possible for you to keep what you just saw for yourself?

**? ? ? Jose **

"I'm certainly not going to go see my Godfather and tell him that I saw _Christian _hanging out with a Mazarati. Didn't you ever heard of the messenger always getting killed?"

Jose chuckled at the joke, though he doubted that Raymond would ever try to kill Ethan, or any of his siblings, no matter how bad the news they would give him was bad. still, he liked the fact that, though Ethan never asked for details, it was clear that he had a fairly good idea of how Raymond built his fortune. He wasn't as naive as his sister.

**It's not what you think. I'm just teaching Andrea a lesson. He'll think twice next time, before going after Ana. Christian **

Jose kept his face stoic, though all he wanted to do was go to his friend and tell him to let it go. Andrea already lost a son, and apparently, Christian was aiming to make the Italian's heart bleed, now, toying with the daughter he loved the most. Suddenly, he looked up, seeing clear in Christian's game, and tried to spot through the window if there was anyone he knew, and there he spotted Jordan, sitting at the terrace of a café just next street.

**This is a dangerous game, Christian. You too have a weakness, now. And speaking of which, Ana's not going to like it when she learns that you're playing with Suzannah. They're from the same circles. Everyone knows everyone, just as Ethan proved it to you. Jose**

**Trust me, no one will ever dare come after Ana, after that. As for her, she knows, which is why I can't see you tonight. I'm seeing her and heading to Washington in the morning. Christian **

**What about Raymond? Jose**

**This is my revenge. Raymond already had his. Christian **

.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So Jose and Ethan are getting serious, they're getting a dog! And Elena is more worried about Jose than her own son, aha**

**💚 What do you think of Mia being close to Ethan?**

**💚 And what do you think of this glimpse of Suzannah? And that glimpse of domestic life we saw from Jose's eyes of Ana and Christian**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	54. Chapter 53: This Particular Girl

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 53****: This Particular Girl (1,8K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

💚 **And, I know the chapter is short, but it is necessary, just as the one before. There is still a lot that has to take place, and ... well ... I can't drop things out of the blue.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ryan's PoV **

With a final deep breath, Ryan looked one last time at the box in his hand, before closing it with a snap. He knew he had no reason to be nervous, he and Suzie talked about this day several times before, so she knew it was coming, and he knew what her answer would be. And still, he was anxious that she would refuse his proposal at the last second.

He had planned it all, going the extra mile just to be sure that she would remember his proposal for years. Suzie was a rather simple girl. She wasn't really into romantic tropes and even made fun of them when she saw them in movies or TV shows. But still. She had told Ryan again and again that she wanted him to give her a proposal worth remembering. She didn't care much for the wedding itself, she just wanted to remember the proposal.

So there he was, hoping that what he had planned for her would meet her expectations. And Christian, who was next to him, did not help calm his nerves in the slightest. It was as if he did not understand the pressure Ryan was on.

"You know she wants to marry you, stop fussing over nothing," The copper-haired man dismissed with a blasé tone as they neared the bar where Suzie was working.

"Maybe I should wait and get a better ring," Ryan suggested, though he was more talking to himself than to Christian. He saw from the corner of his eye that Christian rolled his eye, probably tired of hearing over and over about rings and proposal from him.

"Well, we'll see if you're that confident when that time will come for you. It's not as easy as it looks," Ryan snapped, though he was not expecting Christian to say answer anything to him.

He had grown accustomed to Christian keeping his private life, private and had resigned himself with the probability that he would never get to meet Christian's family in the future. Christian seemed dead-on on keeping his professional life separate from his private life, and Ryan had to admit that if his copper-haired friend had found a way to actually keep on living like that, it was only a reason more to admire the man.

But surprisingly, Christian smirked, and said, sure of himself, "When I'll propose, I won't be sweating over if the proposal is right, but rather if she's going to accept it."

Ryan blinked a few times, surprised of this sudden and unexpected share of information from Christian's part, but when he came out of his astonishment, it was too late, Christian had regained his usual unreadable face and was walking toward their usual spot.

Strangely, this new found knowledge about Christian gave Ryan a slight boost of confidence. Though Christian was younger than him, Ryan had always looked up to him, probably because he was a born leader, or maybe it was because Christian had a strong mindset and was always determined on achieving his goals. More than once, Christian had unknowingly been an example to Ryan. And now that he knew that the man he admired was also planning on proposing in the future to his own girlfriend, Ryan felt a bit more confident to do so.

He watched Suzie working on closing the bar whilst the last few customers were singing at the karaoke stand, drunk out of their mind, and with a heavy sigh, he decided that it was then, or never. Gathering all the courage he could, he walked to the stage, giving a nod to the manager to put on the music for _Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You_.

Suzie had already told Ryan several times that she liked the old songs, and that one of her favourite part of her job was to watch people sing their heart out in a song. And though he was a friendly lad (and a social one, compared to Christian), he knew that wouldn't it have been for Suzie, he never would have put himself like that in public. Despite not being in his nature to be at the centre of attention, there was also the fact that such a gesture could put him in a bad situation given his line of work. He was literally showing to the world what his weakness was. But he was also confident that he had Christian to protect him, and that would be reason enough to keep his enemies at bay.

As he sang his song, he kept his eyes on Suzie, even when he started improvising a little dance, and he saw with delight that she was all smiles to his eccentrics. So when he was nearing the end of the song, he got off the stage, knelt in front of her, and instead of finishing the song with the proper lyrics, he simply sang,

_"Oh pretty baby, oh would you marry me?" _

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ryan's PoV**

"I heard that congratulations are in order," Raymond said as a waiter brought their food.

He and Ryan were having lunch in a small Italian parlour, which Ryan found odd, to begin with. It was well known that Andrea Mazarati owned this business, and Raymond always had made a point not to be seen in his foes' territories. But still, he did not question his boss's judgement and blindly followed the older man.

Christian was on a trip to Macau, settling a new manager from one of their casinos in Vegas, and though Ryan had noticed that there had been a tension between Raymond and his protégé, he could tell that whatever issue they had with one another, they had resolved it. still, it had been weird working around the two of them during that period, since never before Raymond and Christian had ever been in disagreement.

Ryan shrugged, not really eager to talk about his proposal to Suzie. This was something that he had noticed from the start. He always tried to keep his private life away from Raymond. Which he didn't really know why. Raymond had never done anything that could lead him to think he would harm Ryan or his loved one. But if he were to chose who he trusted most between the two men, Ryan would have automatically gone for the younger one.

Raymond nodded, taking Ryan's shrugging as answer enough, but before he could try to dig deeper into his personal life, a third person interrupted, with a very angry voice,

"You keep your _dog_ away from my daughter! You hear me?"

It was Andrea, holding in his hands several of the pictures that Ryan himself snatched of the fake couple that Christian created out of him and Suzannah Mazarati. And though he kept his face unreadable, he couldn't help but feel inwardly satisfied that Christian got Andrea exactly where he had wanted him.

When Christian had asked Ryan to take the pictures, he had been really clear that his only goal was to give Andrea a taste of his own medicine, and given the expression on the Italian's face, Christian succeed. He had probably sent the photos just before leaving to Macau, just to let Andrea simmer in his own fears and apprehensions for his daughter. What Christian had probably not expected was for Raymond to have lunch at Andrea's restaurant.

Raymond looked at the picture as if he was looking at an interesting piece of art in a museum, and Ryan could swear that for a second, Raymond victoriously smirked. But that impression quickly faded away, and Raymond was harbouring his usual unreal face as he nonchalantly uttered,

"I have no control over my … '_dog_'. He does what he wants, and _whom_ he wants."

Ryan could almost see the steam coming out of Andrea's ears. The Italian man leaned closer to the table, trying to be imposing as he dangerously said,

"Mark my word, Raymond. You already took my son away from me, I will not let you —"

"Let _me_? But as you pointed out so eloquently, this isn't _me_ on the pictures. If you have an issue, deal with the _dog_. meanwhile, remember that I don't respond well to threats, Andrea. Last time you tried that, you almost lost your life. Don't make me regret my sparing your life."

On those words, Raymond got up and Ryan and he left, Ryan putting his gun back in place. He had drawn his piece out as soon as Andrea had barged in, ready to respond in case of danger. As the two men from Idris excited the parlour, it accorded to Ryan that Raymond might have known more than he let on concerning Christian and Suzannah and that he had come on purpose to this place, just to daunt Andrea, which worked perfectly.

"I think you should keep an eye on him," Raymond said matter-of-factly as they climbed on the back of his car, waiting for the driver to take them away.

Ryan nodded, keeping for himself that Christian had already given him the exact same order ever since the terrible night Raymond received the pictures. In fact, Ryan was sure that if Christian had still not killed Andrea himself, it was simply by pure courtesy to Raymond. He knew that several times in the past Christian had told Raymond to get rid of Andrea in a definitive manner, and Raymond each time argued against it.

They were in the middle of Manhattan when Raymond said something that made Ryan snort, "I never pictured Christian as someone who could hold the grudge so much."

Raymond turned his head to Ryan, surprised by his answer, and so Ryan explained, "Christian is loyal to you, and would have killed the entire family if you didn't put a stop to him. Those pictures may be a threat to you, but to him, they were a hit in his pride. They proved that something wasn't right in his system."

Raymond looked at Ryan, assessing his words and making him feel suddenly stupid. It was as if what he just said was the most ridiculous thing in the world. then, the boss looked by the window as he muttered,

"Maybe. But I still think it was plain old grudge. Though you are right, he would kill that entire family if it wasn't for me."

.

.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So ii know, it wasn't a Christian chapter, and we didn't get any love, but PROMISE, next chapter will have plenty.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So there is a very obvious hint here ... Did you guys pick up on that?**

**💚 What do you think of Ryan in general?**

**💚 And what do you think of Raymond's reaction to that whole Suzannah thing? Did he know?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	55. Chapter 53: The Dream

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 53****: The Dream (4,2K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy food. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

As Christian waited for Mia to come out of the building where she had her late classes, he checked with Ryan over the phone on what happened while he was in Macau. Ryan was quick to tell him that Andrea had a bit of a word with Raymond, sure that Christian had been acting on Raymond's orders. According to Ryan, Raymond did not ask anything about this whole affair to Ryan. In fact, Christian was surprised that Raymond never even tried to talk him out of it.

He wasn't naive enough to think that Raymond didn't have a clear inkling of what was going on between him and Suzannah, especially since Christian never tried to hide the affair. In fact, this was the reason why he did not bother to warn Raymond about Andrea's possible anger before he left, he was perfectly aware of his boss's knowledge concerning his plans for the youngest Mazarati.

But it was true that Raymond seemed to give him more of a free rein ever since the incident concerning Ana and firearms. And though he liked the position, though he liked the power that it was giving him, Christian had to admit that a part of him was apprehensive of what it could mean. If Raymond was retiring himself bit by bit, it would mean that he would ultimately leave his side, and no matter how much he liked the power, Christian wasn't ready for that.

Finally, Mia came out of her building, surrounded by two young men of her age who were animatedly talking to her. She laughed throwing her head back when one of them said something, and he used the occasion to put his hand on her shoulder, before freeing on his steps, his eyes catching the sight of Christian. Christian did not move, keeping his face neutral until Mia saw what had disturbed her comrade and brightly smiled at him. She happily waved at him, and he waved back, watching the two guys hastily say their goodbyes to Mia and leave her side in a hurry.

As she walked to him, he couldn't help but smirk as he asked, "Am I killing your buzz?"

He knew that, without even trying, he had a scary aura around him. Mia told him on a regular basis that he was too stern-looking, and that he ought to smile a bit and buy a pair of jeans, just to prove that he was human.

With a smile she walked side by side with Christian to his car, all the while letting me know, "Not really. Jeremy keeps thinking that if he gives me time, I'll eventually fall for him, but … What can I say, some guys are delusional like that ... Right now, all I can really give my time and effort to is my degree."

This was something he liked very much about Mia, she had her head on her shoulders. She knew what she wanted, and she was not going to let anything get in the way. Though he had to admit, she was always a bit hysterical around the time of exams at the end of a term.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?" Mia asked, buckling her belt as Christian started driving away.

"I came to steal a bit of your time. I need your input on something."

"Ooh, you need my opinion. This is going to cost you. I intend to be a very expensive lawyer," She joked, making Christian gently shake his head, repressing a smile, before he clarified,

"Well, I need a feminine point-of-view, more than an opinion."

"Don't worry, Christian. You look good. There is no need for me to give you a makeover. Though … a pair of jeans once in a while wouldn't hurt."

Christian did not answer anything to that, knowing that Mia was mainly teasing him for his constant austere appearance. In fact, Ana also several times had the same comments concerning him, but unlike Ana, she had had the rare occasions of seeing Christian in jeans once in while when abroad. She even had a whole week of him in military trousers when they went to Peru and climbed a mountain.

During the rest of the ride, Mia made yet another joke about how Bastille was still a ghost to her, and she then talked about her student life, and how she was excited about what she was doing during this school year, saying that she was leaning much more than the previous year. She was thinking of planning a weekend in Seattle with Ana, so they could both visit their friend Katherine, which was news to Christian. Though Ana expressed a lot that she was missing her best friend, she never told Christian about going to see her for a weekend.

When he parked in front of the shop he needed to go to, he caught Mia's surprised eyes before she quickly glanced around, trying to see if there was a more suitable shop for him. He smirked, knowing that no one would ever have thought he would go to a shop like that, and went inside with confidence.

As soon as Mia had followed him inside, she asked with a whisper where he could clearly hear excitement and jollity, "Does this mean I am finally going to meet your mystery girl?"

"In a shop?" Christian responded, feigning ignorance, which made Mia roll her eyes and smile even wider.

"Don't be coy with me. We both know that you're didn't bring me here to have my input on a bracelet charm or some stupid earrings."

Christian smirked, watching the man he had met a couple of days ago walk to him with a big fake commercial smile. This was one of the reasons he liked Mia, she was quick to think and guess right, and she didn't hesitate to speak her mind to him.

"Well … she won't really be my _girlfriend_ when you will meet her, now, will she?"

Mia beamed at him, but before she could say anything, the man extended his hand to Christian, shaking it vigorously, showing signs that he was all too happy to have Christian come to him for a business transaction. He took them both to a room behind the register, where Christian was sure very few customers ever went to and revealed the drawing for a ring. Though he kept his face as unreadable as usual, Christian was satisfied to see that what was drawn reflected the ring he had envisioned for Ana, but that did bring him total relief. He turned to Mia who was looking at the drawing as well, and asked,

"So, what do you think?"

The seller, feeling that the sale had very little to do with Christian from that moment on, gave all his attention to Mia, and started to brag about what the ring would be, once created, "As you can tell, this will be a one-of-the-kind ring that no one else will have. The silver of the band would perfectly suit your skin and as for the jewels, —"

"_My_ skin? Are you mental? _Me_, with _him_?" Mia interrupted, before bursting in laughter, amused by the very idea of her and Christian being together. Christian, on the other hand, was more interested in what Mia had to say about the design of the ring, and so he gently pressed her by refocussing her attention to the drawing.

She took the paper in her hands, her gleeful smile still lingering on her lips and after a few minutes, she told Christian, "Well, … isn't it going to be a bit too big? I mean, she's going to have to wear that every day for the rest of her life. I don't know … it seems a bit too big to me."

"We can have the ring made to the size of your liking. The scale given here is just so you can see the details in their finest," The salesman quickly said, feeling that he was about to lose the deal of his life.

Though he did not say anything, Christian dismissed what he said. He had other plans for the ring and its making, and it did not involve a jewellery shop in New York, no matter how prestigious the shop was. He only went to this particular shop because he knew they had a designer who was famed to reproduce what the customer requested. So if Mia said that the ring was appropriate for a woman, he was going to keep on going for his plan.

He asked for the drawing to be made with a smaller scale, letting the man know that he would come back the next evening to pick up the design, and then the two of them left. Once back in the car, Mia said something that made Christian genuinely laugh at her,

"You do know that getting a smaller ring means it will cost you more, right?"

"I don't really care about that."

"Of course you don't," She said, slightly shaking her head before her observant mind stroke again, "So further Mrs Grey is born in May?"

Christian slightly frowned, not denying this fact, but wondering if Mia was just guessing around, or if she had had between the lines. The blonde smiled and explained her trail of thoughts, "Emeralds are for those born in May. And since emerald is the biggest stone on the ring …"

Christian slightly smiled, not saying a word, though Mia had been spot on. As he drove back to their place, he let Mia do most of the talking, which she filled with plenty of talk about the ring and Christian's future wedding. She kept trying to get Christian to say something, but he kept his lips sealed, as he always did when it came to Ana. More than once, he wished that Ana had confided in Mia in the same way she confided in Katherine, just so he could talk to her without having to filter everything he said. In fact, he was really surprised that Mia still did not put two and two together concerning Ana and him. She was the one who was spending the most time with the two of them, and with her usual spirit of deduction, it was a surprise that she still did not catch up on their affair.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

_"Daddy!" Shouted a little girl of two with a gleeful giggle, jumping in Christian's arms as soon as he put his keys on the table. He crouched to pick her up and kissed her chubby cheek whilst she wrapped her tiny hands around his neck. _

_"How are you, princess?" He asked, all too interested in what she had to say. _

_This was his favourite moment of the day, going back home to his children and his wife. His son came into the room, proudly smiling and brandishing a tooth that was missing from his mouth. _

_"Daddy, daddy! I fell over in the garden, and my tooth fell! Mom said a tooth fairy would come and pick it up! But, you'll help me protect it, right?"_

_Christian smiled at his son and listened to the whole tale of how brave he had been when his mouth had been bleeding after his tooth fell. The little girl hid her head in her father shoulder when her brother started talking about his he would attack anyone getting in his room._

_Though there was a four years gap between the two children, they looked alike very much. They both had the same strawberry-blond hair, though the little boy's hair was shorter but curlier than the little girl's; they both had the same tanned skin, just like their father. But what Christian liked most in his children's features were their eyes. They had inherited their mother's beautiful blue eyes. _

_Incidentally, just as the little boy was asking his father for backup in order to trap the tooth fairy, their mother came into the room, slightly shaking her head as she reminded her son of the importance of the tooth fairy,_

_"If you trap the Tooth Fairy, she's never going to bring you presents when your other teeth will fall. I'd be careful if I were you. Upsetting fairies is never a good thing."_

_"I'm going to get presents?" The little boy marvelled, forgetting all about his plans against the unwanted intruder._

_"Yes, I told you already while we were in the garden," His mother patiently reminded him. The little boy stared at his fallen teeth, his brain working fast before he stated,_

_"I wish more of my teeth had fallen. So I would have more presents."_

_This made both of his parents laugh at him, but he did not care. He took his sister's hand, and rushed to his room, saying that he needed to put his tooth under a pillow so he could have his present quicker. _

_Christian stood back up, smiling at the brunette in front of him. She tiptoed and kissed him on the lips, but when she tried to walk away, he kept her in his arms, snuggling his nose in the crook of her neck. _

_"How are you doing, babe?"_

_"I'll be better in a few weeks," She joked, just like she had joked twice before when she was nearing the term of her pregnancy. _

_Christian smiled, kissing her neck and resting her hand on her prominent stomach hiding their future child. A future child who greeted the expecting father by kicking the brunette's stomach, making her and Christian smile, looking down at their intertwined fingers. The child kicked again, just right where Christian's hand was._

Christian woke up with a start, a feeling of loss overwhelming him as soon as he opened his eyes. He reached for Ana, and took her in his arms, trying to get back to this happy feeling that his dream had brought. He had come home really late the night before and found Ana sleeping in his bed, waiting for him.

This was something he liked very much in their relationship. Ana was spending more and more nights at his place, which he was far from complaining. He liked finding her his bed and sleeping with her by his side. In fact, he had noticed that no matter how bad a day could have gone, he always felt more peaceful when he would find Ana waiting for him.

Mindlessly, he caressed her skin, when he realised that his hand was on her flat stomach, immediately taking him back to his unaccomplished dream. He could still remember every single detail of it as if it was a memory and not a dream. He remembered that both children had a simple when they smiled, a dimple that they probably had inherited from Ana's mother. He remembered how the little girl's face lit up with delight when she saw him. He remembered Ana's happy smile while listening to their son wonder how many presents he could get with more fallen teeth. And most importantly he remembered how fulfilled her felt with his family.

And now that the dream was gone, and that his hand was lazily resting on Ana's stomach, all he could think about was getting her pregnant with that boy he saw in his dream. The little boy with strawberry-blond curls and bright blue eyes. Without even realising it, a strong urge of desire coursed through him, and he gently laid Ana on her back, slowly but passionately kissing his way down on her.

He felt Ana stir beneath him, but it was only when his mouth came in contact with her most intimate spot that she woke up, letting out a moan of pleasure that encouraged Christian even more. While his hands stimulated her breast, Christian's tongue kept on pleasuring Ana, making her breath more and more shallow by the second, and just before she was about to climax, he stopped his ministrations and crawled back up to bury himself inside her.

Ana let out a little yelp satisfaction, opening her blue eyes, obvious pleasure written in them. After going in and out for a few times, Christian stopped to swing her legs above his shoulders; and when he ploughed back into her, it was as if he knocked out all the air of her lungs. She planted her nails in his forearms, tearing the skin as her inner walls spasmed around Christian's member. He could tell that he had hit the infamous G-spot, and the faster he was going, the closer he was bringing Ana to an orgasm.

And finally, she let out a scream of infinite bliss, her whole body tensing up beneath Christian, triggering his own climax as sweat was trickling down his spine.

Still buried inside her, Christian helped Ana's leg off his shoulders before collapsing on top of her, though he made sure not to shush her under his weight. He mindlessly caressed her hair, kissing her shoulder as a dreamy smile was spread on his girl's lips.

As the two recovered their breath, he let himself wonder. Would she get pregnant right away? Would they first have a boy just like in his dream? How long would he have to wait until he could feel his child kick Ana's tender stomach?

It was only when the brunette got up to go to the bathroom that Christian came back to the reality that Ana could not possibly be pregnant. She was on the pill, and she was really careful about taking it. A cold chill swept through him as disappointment dawned on him, and he got up, put on his trousers and went downstairs, sure that he would not be able to find sleep again.

As he sat down the couch, it occurred to him for the first time in his life that he wished that he had a TV, just so he could numb his mind on something. Clenching his jaw, he closed his eyes, reminding himself than in less than a month, all those worries would be over, and he would be able to make his dream come true.

"Are you okay?" Ana's voice asked from behind him. Christian opened his eyes, only to see a naked Ana coming to sit on his laps, worry on her face.

He tried to smile to her, but the disappointment he felt a few minutes ago was still strong, enabling him to pretend as if nothing happened. Ana furrowed her brows, bringing her small hand to his face, and she inquired,

"Why aren't you in bed?"

"Just a dream I need to shake off," He dismissed, mostly because he felt weak to have been impacted so much by a simple dream. And if there was one thing he did not like to be, especially in front of Ana, it was weak.

"You want to talk about it? Sometimes talking about nightmares can help you purge away the bad feeling they give you," She wisely said, and there were so much worry and honesty in her voice that Christian did not feel like shutting her out.

"It wasn't a nightmare. It was just a _very_ good dream," He let her know, hoping that she would drop the issue. She smiled, waiting expectantly for him to continue, and so he added, "I dreamt of _our_ kids."

He didn't really know what he had expected her to do, but he knew that he had expected a reaction. Instead, Ana closed her face, not showing a single emotion, and ever so slightly raising her eyebrows, as if waiting for Christian to elaborate his dream, which he did,

"We had two. A boy, and a girl. And you were expecting the third one."

He waited for her to say something, his hand having subconsciously take residence on her waist, but for a long moment, Ana did not say a word, simply starring in Christian's eyes. When finally she spoke, she shook her head, as if talking to a child and said with a small smile,

"And you're all shaken up for that? It's just a dream, Christian. See? I'm not pregnant."

She showed her flat stomach, oblivious to the fact that at this very moment, Christian would have gladly given anything he owned just to have it filled with life. With a small sigh, he kissed her jaw all the way to her ear, before he murmured to her,

"I wish you were."

"Don't be ridiculous, I'm on the pill. And anyway —" She stopped herself, but Christian, who knew what she was about to say, finished her sentence for her,

"— And your father doesn't know about us."

She didn't retreat anything to that, simply nodding and taking Christian's hand as she asked him to come to bed with her. He didn't argue, following her back upstairs, though he knew that he would not be able to go back to sleep. Once in bed, Ana snuggled in his arms and asked,

"So … What are the plans for Valentine's Day?"

Christian internally cursed, not much because of the change of topic, (they had already had this conversation several times and knew that they both wanted children, and both had the same views concerning parenthood) but because he had completely forgotten that the fourteenth of February was Valentine's Day. It was only in a couple of days, and he had other plans that he would not be able to cancel for that day.

"I am afraid that we won't be spending the day together," He let her know. He felt her still immediately and could tell that, had she not been tightly wrapped in his arms, she would have turned her back on him.

"Going to spend the day with _Suzannah?" _She tightly asked, making Christian repress a chuckle.

In his haste to get rid of Suzannah and strike Andrea where he knew it would hurt the most, he had forgotten to let Ana know that he had terminated his relationship with the young Mazarati just before going to Macau. It broke the young woman's heart when he told her in very crude and harsh words that he had no interest in her and simply stayed with her out of boredom, but it did what Christian had wanted, it struck a chord in Andrea, and showed him that Christian, unlike Raymond, had no limits.

"I got rid of Suzannah before going to Macau. She was no longer of any use for me," He let the brunette know, and just by the way her body shifted, Christian could tell she was conflicted. She was partly happy that Suzannah was no longer in the picture but also feeling bad for the girl.

"Then why aren't we going to spend Valentine's Day together? There are no good reasons to spend Valentine's Day away from your girlfriend, Christian. As far as I know, only a funeral will be an acceptable excuse for not spending time with me," She accused, feeling completely in her rights.

"Well … you could still come with me to Vegas."

"You're going to spend _V__alentine's Day in Vegas_?!" She asked, sitting up with indignation.

"No. I'm going to be the best man to a friend who happens to be getting married in Vegas, on the fourteenth," He clarified, and though he couldn't clearly see her face, he could tell that she had deflated, seeing no reason why she should object.

"Oh … Well … that _is_ a pretty good excuse."

"But as I said, you are more than welcome to be my date," He repeated himself, a part of him hoping that she would refuse. No matter his respect for Raymond, having Ana in Sin City whilst having the ring he would propose with was a temptation he was no sure to come out off as triumphant.

"No, thank you. You will make it up to me in Italy," She said with a smile in her tone before retaking her place in Christian's arms.

He watched her fall back asleep while thinking of how Italy was going to change everything for him. If everything went according to plan, he would have the ring once he would get back with Ana to the US, and in a month, they would be engaged.

.

.

.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So Christian got a ring ... or will get a ring, what do you think about it?**

**💚 What do you think of Mia in this chapter? And Christian's decision to ask for her input?**

**💚 And what do you think of the dream and Ana's reaction to it? What about Christian's?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	56. Chapter 54: Les Gondoles à Venise

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 54****: Les Gondoles à Venise (2,6K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy food. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

💚 **Anyway, enjoy this chapter and its fluffiness, because well, I enjoyed writing it, haha**

**💚 By the way, Les Gondoles A Venise is actually a French song 😉**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

Their trip to Italy was so far Christian's favourite. Ana loved history, and just like she did in Paris and Tokyo, she made them go through all the historical places, barely giving them rest. it didn't seem to matter to her that she already came to Italy several times with her father, she seemed to enjoy it nonetheless as if it was her first time.

They had landed in Rome, and stayed there for only two days, up from dawn till dusk, visiting the old landmarks that witnessed the passage of time. Christian listened to Ana as she told him all about the history of each monument they visited and watched her being excited about the smallest thing, like throwing a coin in the Fountain of Trevi. But all those small things weren't what made Christian like this trip more than any other he had with Ana.

What made him like this particular holiday was how free he felt. For the first time, he did not check constantly if someone was behind him, tailing Ana and him. Mostly because he didn't care. Ana and he had been together for more than a year and a half, and most importantly, he was about to propose to the girl. In his mind, there was no way he would keep their relationship a secret after that. Whether it was from Raymond or the rest of the world, once they would be engaged, they would be an official item.

During his first morning in Italy, whilst still, in Rome, Christian took the design of the ring to a jeweller and asked for the ring to be ready for a week after. This was something he had thought a lot about. Ana loved romantic gestures, and she had told him more than once how much she liked the charm bracelet and how each charm had a particular meaning to them. Which was why Christian had decided that for their Italian trip, he would not buy her a charm, but simply give her the ring. After all, this was something she would keep on wearing, and he was sure that she would appreciate the significance of the gesture.

But still, that was not the issue of the moment.

After two days in Rome, Ana had expressed her desire to go to the Vatican and made Christian go to mess with her (to Christian's greatest displeasure). Though he respected her faith, he still had problems grasping the fact that she would rely blindly on a higher power that never gave her proof of Its existence. She marvelled at the splendour of the place and even tried to explain to Christian the different kind of Christianities, but she soon dropped the issue when she figured that Christian only listened to please her.

After a quick day at the Vatican, Ana had decided to settle in Venice for she knew the carnival would take place there. At the moment, they were in a gondola, holding hands while the gondolier was singing classical Italian music. Though Ana seemed mesmerised by watching the city and its old architecture, Christian on the other end could not take his eyes away from her. It was the first time he was seeing her so happy, and at this precise moment, he would do anything to keep her happy smile on her face.

Without really thinking about it, he leant forward and kissed her right behind her ear, making her flush and giggle, before she scooped closer to him and taught him a bit more about the history of Venice. She seemed particularly interested in one building and told Christian that her grandparents had had their honeymoon in Venice, and could remember how many stairs there was on the front of that building. She hoped to be able to tell the same tale to her own grandchildren.

When they got off the gondola, they were approached by an artist who spoke really fast Italian and showed them a picture of them. From what Christian gathered, the artist thought that they were such a beautiful couple that he couldn't _not _draw them. Of course, this made Christian roll his eyes - he could recognise a smooth talker when he saw one- but it made Ana swoon, and she paid for the drawing immediately.

The drawing was rather good and accurate, and Christian had to admit that the street artist had some talent. It was of the two of them in the gondola, Christian was looking at Ana as if she was the most beautiful thing in the world, and (to Christian's delight) the artist had perfectly well captured Ana's beautiful smile.

The rest of the day went rather smoothly, with the only hiccup to Christian being that Ana had dragged them to a costume shop for them to participate in the carnival the following day. This was actually one of those things Christian knew he only did for Ana's benefit. He doubted he would ever be that compliant to anyone else … or maybe their children when they would have some.

It was only in the middle of the night that something started to feel wrong to Christian. He was sleeping, but he could tell something was not right. Aware that he still did not have his full five hours of sleep, he stirred a little, reaching for Ana to go back to sleep. But the space next to him was empty. Before he could even register this information, he was up on his feet, reaching for his gun on the nightstand, and he saw a faint light coming from under the door leading to the next room.

With his gun still secured in his hand and ready to shoot, he noiselessly opened the door, only to find Ana sitting on the love seat, facing the window and watching blindly at the horizon. Without a word, he strode to her, hiding his gun in the back of his trousers and concerned by her sudden relocation. It was only when he called out for her name that Ana took notice of his presence, startled out of her sombre thoughts as she weakly smiled,

"Sorry, I did not mean to wake you up."

"Something wrong?" He asked as he knelt in front of her to be at her level. She turned her head, trying to escape his gaze, but when he rested his hands upon hers, she admitted

"I … it's just that … sometimes … I wonder how things would have gone if we had started our relationship differently."

This made Christian frown. He didn't like that she was questioning their relationship like that. Even though she had been the one who insisted for them to be in the closet, she still had wanted this relationship, she actually had been really scared that Christian wanted to end things when his parents came in the picture. So why was she questioning them like that all of the sudden? Especially when they had had such a great time together?

"I don't," Christian firmly affirmed. Ana's eyes gleamed with surprise and curiousness, and so he gently squeezed her hand before telling her,

"This allowed me to see a side of you that only I know of. I am sure that no one else but me knows those tiny little things about you. Like how you hide your worry with a smile, or how you twitch your nose when you want to cry, or even how you always sleep better on your left side. I don't think that even your father knows that about you.

And … as for me. You got to see me in a light no one else has ever seen me. I know that I am not the most expressing and demonstrative man out here, but you got to see something that only you saw. When you are not around, I am a much colder and sterner person. You are the only one who ever gets to see me without the mask, and I don't regret it for a second."

She smiled, but Christian could tell that her heart was not a hundred per cent in it. So he picked her up, and sat on the love seat, making her straddle him. then, he gently caressed her left cheek, waiting for her to look back at him, and when she did, it seemed that she wanted to say something. He kept on waiting when she finally asked,

"Would you quit your job for me?"

Though he kept his face unreadable, Christian had to admit that he was taken aback by this question. This was the one thing he had never expected of Ana. Maybe because she was Raymond's daughter, and therefore marked for life into this lifestyle, or maybe because she had told him many months ago that she wouldn't want him to quit his job for her.

And still, for a second he considered the possibility. He considered leaving this life he excelled at behind, just because she would have asked him to. He considered the nine to five honest job that would make him a pawn in the society. But there was one problem,

"I wouldn't, Ana. I like being who I am, I like the job, no matter the ups and the downs. This is who I am, no matter how much you wish it wasn't the case. And I know you want me to pretend otherwise, to pretend that I only do it because I _have_ to, but I've always been honest to you. I like being in the position I am.

Moreover, me quitting the life wouldn't mean that you or our family would be any safer. On the contrary. No one would be able to protect us but ourselves. This job is not a regular job where you can hand your resignation and people forget about you. Once you've been in it, you're scarred for life. And it goes the same for you, because of who your father is."

He watched her look down, trying to hide her disappointment and her sadness. Christian scooped her closer to him and tried to make her see things his way by giving her a similar choice, "Would you chose me over your father?"

She looked at him with panic. This was obviously something that she had thought of several times, and a question that was still unanswered to her. And he couldn't blame her. Raymond was the only family she had left. Her mother and brother had died long ago, and over the last year, she had lost both her grandparents. Raymond was her only blood relative left.

"I would," He told her. He did not have the same connection to Raymond that she had. "Without hesitation, I would choose you over anyone. You are the most important thing in my life, Ana. I would rather lose Raymond than lose you. I would rather lose a friend a mentor, make myself a powerful enemy than lose you.."

She searched in his eyes, probably gauging his honesty and when she seemed satisfied by what she saw, she finally seemed to relax and she leant froward to kiss him on the lips. Christian eagerly responded, happy to have put her worries aside, though Jose's words echoed somewhere in his mind '_I don't think Ana would be convinced by anything you would say. She would be more of a gestures kind of girl_'. So, had she been convinced by his words? And if not, what could he say to convince her?

But he was taken out of his thoughts by Ana wrapping her arms around his neck and resting her head on his shoulder as she told him, "I'm sorry, I don't know what took over me."

"Don't. Even though I am not the most open person in the world, don't ever doubt that you can tell me whats on your mind."

Even though he could no longer see her face, he knew that she had just smiled, and she said,

"It's just that … I always worry that you're going to get killed. Which is weird, because I don't worry about Dad that much."

Though he didn't say a word, Christian didn't think it was weird. In truth, he thought it was normal. Ana grew up with that image of her father as a strong and powerful man. And even though she knew he was just a man, a part of her probably thought of her father as invincible.

And after all, even though Raymond had already been shot, Ana never actually knew about it, whereas she had seen Christian just after he came back from the dead. And even though he hid his scar with a tattoo, that did not erase the fear from her memory.

Without knowing how to reassure her, Christian simply held the girl he loved tighter in his arms. He strongly inhaled her scent, before reminding her,

"Me working a different job wouldn't prevent me from being possibly harmed, or killed. This is one of the things you cant control in life, and you shouldn't start worrying too much about it. Enjoy the moments you have, instead of living in the what ifs."

Ana leant back to look at him, and Christian witnessed with his own eyes how Ana passed from sad to happy in a split second. If there was something he missed from the beginning of their relationship was how Ana had not been able to conceal her emotions before. Now, she was a master at it.

"Why are we even talking about that? We're here on holiday to have a good time. Let's go back to bed. I want to be all rested tomorrow for the carnival."

She got up and Christian followed her back to their bed. But as she spooned against him, Christian's mind was racing. After the carnival, they would go back to Rome where he would pick up the ring, and then be able to propose to her.

He knew he was not going to do something extravagant like Ryan, no matter how much Suzie had appreciated the proposal. He thought of a romantic dinner back in New York, or casually leaving the ring for her to find it, but after their conversation, another way to propose popped in his mind. Something that would reassure Ana.

And still, even though he was sure of his feelings for Ana, even though he was sure that Ana would love the ring, he couldn't help but feel anxious about popping the question. Finally, he understood Ryan's nervousness when it had been his turn to propose.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So, before anyone starts jumping on my throat, Christian's views on religion are ONLY his. He is a fictional character who doesn't believe. I myself am a religious person, and I do believe in God, but I know we live in a world where people don't and don't understand that concept. Christian is one of those people. I am not attacking or judging anyone, I am just reflecting on how Christian feels in this story. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So Christian is proposing next chapter. How do you think he's going to do it?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana in this chapter?**

**💚 And what do you think of Christian's words about Ana being his first choice? Do you believe him****?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	57. Chapter 55: The Proposal

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 55****: The Proposal (1,2K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy food. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

💚** So, I know this is a short chapter, but the next one (or the one after) should be longer, don't worry. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

The day they came back from Italy, Christian learnt that Raymond was going to Washington a couple of days later with Will, to give his support on some sort of campaign the politician was running. It wasn't something major, and he actually even considered sending Jordan in his place, but in the end, the boss had decided to do it himself. And since it was for such a minor cause, Christian had decided that he would go with Raymond.

Raymond had actually been surprised by Christian's sudden decision to follow him to DC. Mostly because Christian never particularly liked Will (or politics to be more precise). But when he asked Christian where was this interest coming from, Christian simply shrugged it off, saying that he simply wanted to be there.

The truth was, he wanted to ask for Ana's hand as soon as possible. now that they were back from Italy and that he was in possession of the ring, it seemed to burn his pocket, and all he wanted to do was sling it on Ana's finger. Still, this was the one thing he could give to Raymond, the possibility to give his blessing or not.

In all honesty, Christian highly doubted that Raymond would go ballistic and try to kill him. Sure he knew that no matter his relationship with his mentor, Ana would always come first in his boss's eyes, but this was the exact same reason why he did not fear Raymond's wrath that much. No matter what, Raymond would want his daughter to be happy, and if he, Christian, was already asking for her hand, it meant that he was already playing a part in that precious happiness.

And asking Raymond for his daughter's hand actually solved another problem that seemed to torment Ana. She wouldn't have to make a choice. He knew that Raymond would feel like he had been backed into a corner and that no mobster ever liked being in that position; but he also knew that once again, Ana's happiness would come first.

In truth, he hadn't told anyone yet about his plans. Only Mia knew about the ring, though he was sure that Jordan has his doubts that he would propose soon. Whilst being in Italy, he considered calling Jose to let him know of his intentions, but he decided against it. The fewer people knew, the fewer chances there were for Ana to find out about the ring. He wanted it to be a surprise.

The morrow of their return from Italy, Christian went back home rather early, and he was surprised to find Ana waiting for him on the sofa. She usually stayed with her father when she came back from a trip. She brightly smiled to him when he closed the door behind him and announced,

"Daddy is going to Washington. So I figured I'd better spend my time here with you, than home with my shadow."

Christian gave her back her smile, sitting next to her after briefing kissing her. And suddenly, he felt really hot, though he couldn't tell if it was because it was the middle of spring, or if it was because of what he was about to say. As if nothing, he patted his pocket, making sue for the umpteenth times if the ring was at its proper temporary place, all the while Ana placed her legs on his laps like she so often did.

"Well, you'll have to stay here with Bastille, because I am going to Washington with your father."

She seemed confused, clearly oblivious of what was going on inside Christian's head. "But … I don't get it. Dad said that it was some simple routine. Why do _you_ need to go too?"

"I don't really have to go. I just _want_ to go. So I can be there with your father."

"I don't get it."

Why was it so hard to breathe all of a sudden? Or even to swallow? Though he had never been a people person. Christian facade himself to be a rather good spokesman, and a person that was hardly perturbed by anything. And still, doing that one simple thing that was to ask the love of his life to be his wife seemed to be like the hardest thing he had ever done, no matter how little words there were actually needed to be said.

"I'm going to ask him for your hand whilst we'll be there."

He sensed under his palms how she suddenly stiffened and witnessed her face pass from genuine curiosity to an unreadable mask. Her blue eyes stared into his grey ones, suddenly looking cold, and she asked with an even voice,

"Excuse me?"

"I am going to ask your Dad for his blessing so I can marry you. I am tired of having to sneak out to be with you. I want to hold your hand in the streets, without having to watch my back for him to emerge from the shadows," Christian explained, reaching his hand to caress Ana's cheek.

For a few long minutes, Ana didn't say anything, her eyes studying Christian's as if she was seeing him on a whole new light. And then, she brusquely rose to her feet, putting distance between Christian and her. In the blink of an eye, she was by the door, putting her coat on.

"Don't bother. This has been going on for too long anyway. I'm done with you," She said, refusing to look at him, and Christian felt his world crumble under his feet. This was not how things were supposed to happen. He didn't even get the chance to get the ring out of his pocket.

He swiftly walked to her, taking her arm in his hand as she was already trying to open the door; and he forced her to look at him. "Ana?" Was all he could say without feeling his throat hurt. He could actually feel tears burning his eyes and threatening to fall.

Ana still refused to look at him, and she demanded with a cold voice that wasn't hers: "Let me go, _Grey_. Wouldn't want my Dad finding me in your apartment, now, would we?"

And without further ado, she left, slamming the door behind her.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So****, please pay attention to what is happening here … try to put yourself in both character's shoes, according to how I developed them throughout the story.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So that was a disaster ... Did you enjoy it?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana right now? Do you understand her decision?**

**💚 And what do you think will do next****?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	58. Chapter 56: Downfall

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 56****: Downfall (1,2K)**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy food. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

💚 **Anyway, IF YOU REVIEWED, GUEST OR NOT, CHECK HERE. I am actually very glad that many of you grasped Ana's character properly. I had been afraid that it would be an issue, but I guess I shaped her well enough for you to understand what is going on. As for Christian, this had always been the plan, so … All I can say is, remember that this is a story as a whole and not a chapter by chapter story …**

💚** Also, as I said, the next chapter will be fuller, so I know this one is short but ... hehe, next one **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

During his trip to Washington, Christian's mood was the worst. No matter how much he tried, he could not get over Ana's reaction to his proposal. In fact, he did not sleep ever since she stormed out of his place, ending their relationship so abruptly that he did not know how it even happened. During his two days in DC, he had tried to call her, but she had stayed stubbornly silent to his attempts to contact her.

No matter how much he tried to understand her reasoning, he could not understand why she had reacted this way. A proposal was the next logical step in their relationship. They had been together for more than eighteen months, they spent most of their times together. In fact, Ana spent more time at Christian's than at her father's, despite the fact that Katherine was now living in Seattle. And they had talked about their future more than once, several times their wishes colliding and going in the same direction.

Getting married was what was bound to happen, and he knew for a fact that Ana was not opposed at the idea of it. He actually knew that Ana dreamt of a Cinderella wedding. And the only way he could give her that was by letting her father know about them. And in any way, he was certainly not going to get married in secret and start a family, hiding from Raymond Steele.

But the more he thought about it, the more Christian thought that he was overreacting about this whole thing. When he thought back of how everything happened, he had to admit to himself that it hadn't been his smoothest move. So he had decided to wait for a little, before going back to Ana. Just so she could get her head around it. After all, unlike Ryan and Suzie, Ana had had no idea that he had been about to propose.

Still, during his two days away, though he had taken the decision to give Ana some space, he knew that he had been of poor company. Paul barely tried to talk to him, no matter how courteous their relationship had been in the past, and Raymond gave up on the idea of finding out what was bothering him. Mostly because Christian was extremely curt and not open to having any conversation that had no direct correlations to business.

And strangely enough, even though he had assumed that his mind would be obsessed over Ana's last actions, while he was working, Christian did not think even once of his brunette. In fact, she only came in his mind, darkening his thoughts and mood when his brain was not occupied by something else. A part of him wondered if it was because he didn't love her enough (and therefore shouldn't marry her), but then he remembered that it had always been the case. He never let his thoughts wander to Ana whilst working, just so he would not inadvertently endanger her.

After their short time in DC, Raymond and Christian came back to New York City alone, leaving Paul in Washington a few more days on his own. Unlike he usually did when coming back from a trip with Raymond, Christian didn't try to debrief what had happened during the last couple of days. He heard Raymond trying to at least make small talks, but his mind was back on Ana who still did not contact him in any way.

He had decided to give her a week to herself, but after the car dropped Raymond to his place, and the mansion was fading away from his view, he brusquely told the cab to pull over, and he went back to the Steele residence, sneaking his way in like he did so many times before.

He knew that it was dangerous to do so with Raymond obviously still awake, but at this precise moment, he did not really care. All he wanted to do was to see Ana and clarify what had happened between them.

Once in her room, he started pacing, waiting for her to get in, and starting to doubt that maybe she actually decided to spend the night at a friend's house. And as this thought occurred to him, jealousy started creeping out on him. He knew Katherine was out of town, and Mia did not like having guests during school terms. He didn't like to think that maybe she was spending the evening with someone like Jack, or whatever other male friends she had.

But finally, the door of her room opened, lifting away the dark thoughts that came to Christian, and she repressed a gasp when she saw Christian in her room. For a moment, they stared at another, before she squinted her eyes at him, and spat,

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to you about what happened on Wednesday," He told her, hating how cold and I control of herself she had suddenly become.

"There is nothing to talk about … Now, if you don't mind, can you please get out of my room. I was about to go to bed."

"Clay —"

"_Leave_!" She almost screamed, showing the door with an authoritative finger.

This had the merit to take Christian aback a little, this was the first time he was hearing, or even seeing, anger in Ana's voice. She was always such a sweet, loving and forgiving person. But his surprise barely lasted a few seconds, before being replaced by his own anger,

"Are you really going to pretend that nothing happened between us?! We've been together for almost two years! I don't believe that you can just turn your back and —"

"Well, believe it. As I said, it has been going on for too long. I should have ended this, months ago. Now, get out my room or I'll scream!"

"Ana …" He tried to plead, not sure of what he could actually say.

But when she turned her back on him, the reality he had been trying to suppress during those past two days came crashing down on him. Ana was through with him. What he had thought could be their future would never be. She was done with him.

He didn't really know how he actually left her room, or how he managed to get to the next place he was. All he knew was that his brain was foggy and that, for the first time of his life, he would give anything to fall into oblivion.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So****, next chapter is another PoV, can you guess which one?**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So how will Christian find oblivion? Can you guess?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana right now? How many of you hate her, right now? **

**💚 And what do you of Christian as well?**

**💚 And what do you think will do next****?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	59. Chapter 57: The True Meaning of Friends

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 57****: The True Meaning of Friendship (3,0K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** FIRST OF ALL, my thoughts go to everyone across the world. This is a difficult time for us all, and I hope none of you or your closed ones is affected. I am not a doctor, nor a politician but don't fall into panic and just respect the security measures. Be as clean, if not cleaner than usual. Eat healthy food. And look after yourself and your loved ones. Stay indoors as much as possible, until we can do something about this terrible disease that is striking us all. Those are the times to look for one another and not be selfish. I know this sounds corny, but after seeing people buying 15 packs of toilet rolls and fighting for yet another, I just feel that we're missing out on what really matters. This virus doesn't discriminate and doesn't tire. We should fight against it, not against our peers for an extra pack of toilet rolls …**

💚 **Anyway, IF YOU REVIEWED, GUEST OR NOT, CHECK HERE. I know that many of you hate Ana (and me), but the story was always going this way. A few of you picked up on that, which I am glad of because it means that I did something right somewhere. Still, for those who feel like Ana was out of character, you need to re-read a few of the Ana centric chapters. I have many things to say about all of this, but I will wait for the end of the story to explain myself …**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Mia's PoV **

It was the middle of the night, when Mia's phone rang, waking her up from her sleep and putting her in a bad mood. Though she was a studious person and an early bird, Mia still liked her sleep. She cursed at herself for forgetting to put her phone on silence like she usually did so no one would interrupt her sleep, and was surprised to see Suzie's number appear on her screen.

She had met Suzie, Ryan's girlfriend, a few months ago during a dinner that Christian had at his place and actually quickly bonded with the girl. The two of them had a few days out together, and though she liked Ana and Kate, Mia liked being with Suzie a bit more. Probably because the bartender had a more relatable life than the two socialites.

With a groggy voice, she answered the call, hoping that nothing bad had happened to the black girl for her to call at two in the morning.

"I'm sorry to wake you up, Mia, but I didn't know who else to call."

Mia sat up straight in her bed, concerned by the worry she could hear in her friend's voice. "What's wrong?" She asked, suddenly completely alert.

"Christian is at the bar, almost passed out."

"Are you sure this is Christian?" She inquired, perfectly aware of her best friend's strict diet and conduct. There was no way Christian would ever get drunk, even less in a bar where he knew people. This was simply not Christian.

"Well … yeah. I think I remember what my husband's best man looks like," Suzie snapped, worrying Mia more than reassuring her.

"Okay, I'm on my way."

She got out of bed, trying to figure out what happened for Christian to let himself go like that. Christian liked control, and being drunk certainly didn't qualify as having control over his life. For a moment she hesitated, pondering on whereas she should call a cab, or go over the second option. But then, she rationalised herself thinking that whatever state she was going to find Christian in, he would not like being like that in front of a stranger.

Which was why, she took the lift to Ethan's and Jose's and got in the apartment, praying that she would not disturb them in some intimate moment. For a moment, she hesitated, realising that she should have called Jose instead of going into his apartment, and so she simply knocked on the door of their bedroom. A few seconds later, Jose's head popped out of the room, showing obvious traces of sleep, though his whole body was in a defensive position.

"We need to go pick up Christian," Was all Mia said. It seemed to take barely half a second for the information to go to Jose's brain before he nodded and went back inside his room.

She waited a few minutes, and when Jose reappeared, they left to take his car. He did not ask a single question, simply driving to Suzie's bar as Mia told him, and Mia wondered if it was because he was anticipating whatever might have happened to Christian, or if his brain was still groggy with sleep.

The car ride seemed to last forever to Mia, and when they finally arrived, she almost jumped out of the car, rushing inside the bar and letting Jose deal on his own with parking. There she found Christian arguing with Suzie who apparently refused to give him any more alcohol.

"I should have brought my camera," Ryan said behind her, startling her a little. Mia turned her head to look at Ryan who was harbouring a mocking smile, looking at the scene between his friend and his wife, but Mia did not hold it against him. She knew that Ryan had always tried to make Christian loosen up and that he was probably seeing the whole thing as Christian finally doing so.

When they approached the table, Suzie sighed of relief and explained, "When I came to do my shift, he was already on a few drinks. I'm pretty sure he finished a whole bottle of scotch, if not more. You deal with him."

Mia walked to Christian with worry, but he barely acknowledged her, playing with his empty glass sullenly. She heard behind her Jose talk with Suzie and Ryan, and she could actually feel his gaze on Christian and her.

"What happened, Christian?" She asked, resting a friendly hand on his back.

He simply shook his head, apparently not willing to talk, but his face showing sadness, which made Mia feel for him. She was so used of him never showing any sort of emotions that she wasn't prepared to see that sort of anguish on her best friend's face. In fact, the emotion even felt foreign on Christian.

Ryan and Jose came to the table, and both of them hoisted Christian up, each throwing one of his arms around their neck before they walked to the car. Mia climbed in the back with Christian, who lay down, using her laps as a pillow. She looked down, a part of her starting to come up with an explanation for Christian's behaviour, but the optimistic part of her hoped that she was wrong.

For a while, no one said a word, the silence being only broken by Christian mumbling incomprehensible words in the back. Mia saw how Jose would often check the rearview mirror to look at Christian with worry when Ryan broke the silence and joked,

"Christian letting lose. I never thought I'd see that one day. Even less me picking you at a bar because you're too drunk. Maybe you should make sure that someone is with you when you want to drink that much, though."

"What's the point, anyway?" Christian mumbled loud enough for everyone in the car could hear him. Mia furrowed her brows a little, not liking how her theory was getting confirmed by the detached tone Christian used.

"I'm just saying, next time you want to get hammered, call me so I can limit you and you don't make a spectacle out of yourself like that," Ryan lightly said, though Mia could tell that he was growing concerned behind his facade of joking carelessness.

"There won't be a next time. There isn't any future. She just … stopped."

No one said a word, but Mia and Jose still exchanged a glance in the rearview mirror. So, what she had hoped not to be true was, in fact, the reason behind Christian's inebriation. The proposal did not go as Christian had expected it. A part of Mia briefly wondered if Jose had known about the ring as well, but most of her focus was on the fact that Christian must have really loved the girl to take her refusal so strongly.

Ryan glanced at the back, catching Mia's eye, just before Christian took a box out of his pocket, and played with the ring, mumbling to himself that everything was pointless. And out of nowhere, Mia felt a wave of anger against this girl she had never known.

She didn't know how the proposal went, but she was sure that if Christian reacted so badly to the refusal, it must be because it had been brutal. After all, Christian often was confronted with things not going his way in his line of work, and he always reacted well to those disappointments. And Mia couldn't help but resent the unknown girl because if the girl had had any sort of feeling, or even respect for Christian, she would have let him down gently.

Once in front of their building, Ryan helped Jose to take Christian in his apartment, and asks nonchalantly about the secret girlfriend, and though Jose pretended that he had no idea what was talking about, Mia could tell that he was had spent enough time with him to pinpoint the telltales of him covering up the truth, no matter how good he was at hiding them.

Ryan left them all in the living room, saying that he would pick up Suzie, and advising them to get a good cure for hangovers for Christian since it was probably his first time drinking. As soon as they were alone, Jose helps Christian back to his feet, and announced,

"I'll take him to his room."

"I'll help you."

"No! It's okay, I'll handle it," He precipitately said, making Mia roll her eyes and sliding herself on Christian's other side, not giving Jose a choice in the matter.

With difficulty, they made Christian climb up the stairs and dragged him to his room. He slumped in his bed with a grunt, apparently barely conscious that he was removing his shoes himself. And for a second, Mia was destabilised. She saw many frames where Ana was featured with Christian, brightly smiling at the camera whilst Christian was having a more restrained smile, though it was a smile that she had never seen on her friend.

She felt Jose's gaze on her, making her feel self-conscious for a second. She quickly averted her eyes from the frames, and went back downstairs, filling Bastille's bowl with water mostly to occupy her hands. After a few minutes, she heard Jose coming back downstairs, and she let him know,

"I'll stay here with him. You go back to Ethan before he freaks out finding the bed empty."

Jose did not say a word, nor moved. She could tell by his body language that he was probably looking for the right words to formulate what he wanted to say. But he didn't have to say a thing. She knew what he was about to say, and so she cut him off,

"I'm not a kid, Jose. I won't go gossiping around about what I saw upstairs. Christian is my friend as much as he is yours."

He gave her a small apologetic smile, which she brushed off by shaking her head, and after he left, she went back upstairs, thinking of what she had just learnt. She was pretty sure that Christian had had a girlfriend from the moment he came to help her. Which meant it had been more than a year that they have been together.

Before going to the bedroom, Mia swang by the bathroom and saw many feminine products, as well as a second toothbrush next to Christian's, another bathrobe and even a hairbrush with a few red hairs stuck in it. And as she went back to Christian's room, a tiny part of her felt a bit hurt that none of her friends deemed her trustworthy enough to share this secret with her.

It was obvious that Jose knew, and she was pretty sure that Kate knew as well. So, it left her, a friend to both parties and oblivious of their implication with one another.

Her eyes went back to the frames, analysing what she was seeing. It was a selfie taken by Ana, where she could see the Eiffel Tower behind them. If she was honest, Mia had never seen Ana smile like that. She was radiant, her free arm holding Christian's who wasn't really looking at the camera. In fact, Mia could easily imagine that Christian had been looking at Ana's reflection on the phone, rather than the camera when that picture had been taken.

She put back down the frame, repressing a shiver and swiftly looking away. She felt like she had just witnessed something intimate that she hadn't been supposed to see. She had never seen Christian break out of his self-imposed control, not even when he took her to examine the ring's design. Showing his feelings was probably something he reserved to Ana's eyes only, and yet, she broke his heart.

As she sat on the armchair by Christian's bed, she noticed a ginger cat next to the passed out man, who was staring at her unblinkingly. She assumed that Bastille must have felt his master's distressed, and judged it greater than hiding from her. While she kept looking at Bastille's blue eyes, she tried to understand why neither Christian or Ana ever came clean about their relationship.

And then she remembered. Ana was Raymond Steele's daughter. Christian's boss. A mafia kingpin. A man who often intervened in his daughter's love life according to Kate and Ethan. Was Raymond the reason why Ana broke up with Christian? Did he find out about them and forced his daughter to make a choice? Or did she refuse to come out of the closet because of her father?

In all honesty, Mia had thought at first that I had been Christian who didn't want to make things official. She thought that he simply followed the stereotype of men being afraid of commitment. But the more she thought about it, the less it made sense. Christian wasn't someone who liked to hide, no matter what he did. And Mia couldn't see why he would have bought a personalised ring if he wasn't willing to commit.

Christian made a small groan, tearing Mia out of her thoughts, and she took the blanket to cover him up. When she did so, he told her,

"She said no."

"I gathered," She gently said, wiping the sweat off his forehead with a piece of sheet.

"She didn't even let me show her the ring," He lamented, his voice breaking at the end. She swallowed hard, feeling bad for her friend and his heartbreak, but surprised at Ana.

"Christian … I don't know what to tell you. Did she give you a reason for you to work on?"

Christian darkly sniggered, keeping his eyes closed as his face turned to its usual cold demeanour, "It's simple, Mia. I wasn't her Prince Charming, no matter how strongly I felt for her. She might have been my one, but I wasn't hers. I wasn't enough for her."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Mia's PoV**

The next morning, Mia was awakened by someone pulling a blanket over her. She promptly opened her eyes, only to see Christian with a quilt, trying to bring some warmth to her. She blinked a little, straightening in the armchair as she took her friend in. There was no trace of him having had the worst night of his life. He was in a suit (as usual), shaven and fresh out of the shower. She glanced at the clock on the bedside table and saw that it was barely seven.

"How are you?" She croaked, getting up and stretching.

Christian let down the blanket on his bed, as he let her know,

"I'm great."

The two of them silently battled, Christian daring Mia to mention that he could be anything but great. She hesitated but figured that the best way to help her friend was to have some long overdue girl talk with another friend of hers. So she simply shrugged it off and followed Christian to the kitchen, where she made him her own special remedy for hangovers.

Christian took the glass, thanking Mia, before he solely said, "About last night, Mia … Don't tell her anything. This was part of the agreement, no one was to know. And no matter what happened between us, I am a man of my word."

"Christian … maybe you should try and talk to her. I know Ana can be childish and stubborn, but —"

"But she doesn't want to deal with me when it involves commitment. I get it. I did talk, and she did refuse to listen. She made up her mind, and there is nothing more to add to that."

Though she did not say anything, Mia still noticed the way his jaw clenched when she said Ana's name, and she suddenly wondered if he was ever going to say her name again. Though she had never seen Christian hold the grudge, she was sure that he was someone who did not forget, not forgive. And she didn't want his feelings of love for Ana to turn into hate.

"I'm sure that if she really knew how you felt yesterday night, she would —"

"I'm asking you as a friend, Mia," Christian cut her off, his voice suddenly so cold that it sent chills down her spine. And for the first time, she could actually feel why people were so scared of her friend. It wasn't much that she feared for her life, on the contrary, Christian was the one person she knew she could depend on to stay alive. It was as if she heard a latent threat in the simple words he had for her.

And so, even though it was against her instincts, she promised not to talk to Ana. She was Christian's friend first, and if she had to choose, she would pick Christian, no matter how much she liked Ana. Christian meant more for her than Ana did.

"I won't say a word."

"Thank you."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So, I am going to emphasise on this, Christian NEVER DRUNK BEFORE THIS NIGHT. Several chapters ago, he did tell Ana why he never drank, which shows how much heartbroken he was, to go against what he had always been about, and try to drink his sorrow away. Congrats to all of those who guessed that Christian was going to find oblivion in alcohol. This is actually the reason why I made a point on saying several times that Christian did not drink.**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So how are you feeling about Christian and his way to cope?**

**💚 What do you think of Mia in this chapter?**

**💚 And what do you of Christian's last words in both parts****?**

**💚 And what do you think will do next****?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	60. Chapter 58: The Sister & The Politician

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 58****: The Sister & The Politician (3,8K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** So once again, I am repeating myself, Mia's povs are not filler chapters. I know that at the moment it's not what you want, but they are crucial to the overall story. I know where this story is going, and I know how I want to get you there. If it means it will have different povs, so be it. I'm sorry it's not going exactly how you wanted it, but this how I want it. To give you a metaphor, it's as if you skipped all the non-Frodo chapters in the Lord of The Rings, you would still get to the end, but you would miss a lot of information**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

It had been three weeks since Ana had ended brutally their relationship, but Christian did not let it bring him down. On the contrary, he was even more determined to prove that he was not affected to all. Especially since Jose and Mia kept on treating him as a time bomb.

If he was honest with himself, he did not like the image of himself when he had been drinking. And he liked even less that he had been drinking in the first place. In retrospect, the very concept of it seemed so foreign to him that wondered if he had been in his right mind, to begin with. But every time he thought back to this night, he remembered that his main goal had been to forget about everything.

Still, now that he was sober and clear of mind, he had the clarity to realise that he didn't want to ever feel that low and weak again. It actually felt like he had borne his soul and heart to Ana and that left him feeling very vulnerable. Which he swore to himself would never happen again. In truth, this whole side of him that came out of nowhere for the brunette was something he hoped to never see again.

Strangely enough, Jose was the one who kept on pushing the issue and kept on pressurising him to speak to Ana. Mia seemed to have understood that Ana was someone of the past now, whilst Jose did not seem willing to give up on the doomed relationship. Which irritated Christian knowing that Jose had been pitching against that very same relationship from the beginning.

And what Jose didn't know was that Christian had tried to talk to Ana. He didn't go as far as to see her, because he still bore in mind what happened the last time he had seen her, but he did try to call her a couple of days after his drunken night. Only to realise that she had blocked his number. This was when he knew that he should stop trying to make it work with her. He had never been her one.

It wasn't as if he wallowed in self-pity and started hated the girl. He knew that she loved him. Or at least that she had loved him at some point in their relationship. She did tell him several times in his sleep. And she proved it, more importantly. She agreed to take shooting lessons for his peace of mind, she came to see him whenever he was down or simply wanted to see her, she did share with him things that she never shared with anyone else. And most of all, he could actually _feel_ her love.

But the fact that she could put to the past so easily what had happened between them proved to Christian that she was never as serious about them as he was. In the back of her mind, she probably knew that what they had would never be a lasting thing, unlike what Christian had thought. And actually, the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. As he told Mia on his drunken night, he wasn't her Prince Charming.

Sure he met a few criteria for her dream guy, but he was far from being a great guy in her point-of-view, given his line of work, and there was a high probability that Raymond wouldn't have been okay with them getting together as well. And most importantly, the last couple of times he saw her, he did not manage to make her cry. In fact, he did not manage to bring any emotions out of her.

He simply ceased to hold any sort of importance in her heart.

And though he could deal with that, and was doing his best to convince himself that he was okay with everything and that he was the bigger man, the situation still affected him. He was too proud of a man to admit that he was hurt by both her refusal and her cutting all ties with him, but still, this was the truth.

In fact, he was so hurt that he did not manage to get rid of everything reminding him of Ana in his apartment. Mia had advised him to put everything in a box away, but he never really had the will to remove the framed pictures or even her toiletries from the bathroom. After all, those were the only thing proving to him that anything they ever had been real, and that Ana did love him at some point in her life.

This particular aspect of his life actually made him wonder about his boss, and if he was going to end up like him, though he doubted that this would ever happen. First of all, though Raymond still loved her, Carla was dead and six feet under. But she had loved him and proved it to him. They had years together in which Raymond could reminisce in his saddest days. And though Christian knew he loved Ana, the rational part of him told him he would get over his heartbreak and settle with someone else.

Still, he knew that he would never give himself completely again as he did with Ana. Sure he hadn't been the most demonstrative and talkative person, but he had shown her a side of him that was very close to his heart. And if heartbreak meant feeling so miserable and weak, Christian was going to make sure he would never give the power to someone else to make him feel like that again, to have that kind of power on him.

In fact, Ryan had tried a few times taking him out at night, in order for him to 'get laid', or more likely, in order to really know what happened. But Christian had remained tight-lipped. Though Ryan had a vague idea of how disastrously Christian's relationship ended, he did not have any idea of Ana's involvement in it.

Which was the contrary to Lauren. Though she never told Christian anything, he could tell by the way she was sometimes furtively looking at him that she had a clear idea that Ana and he were no longer together. Which all in all at least comforted Christian that she was doing her job properly and simply had noticed that Ana was no longer paying her impromptu visits to Christian whenever she felt like it.

The only two people who knew were Mia and Jose, though Christian had no doubts that Ana had probably called her best friend to let her know about their downfall. In fact, Mia had texted Christian, letting him know that she needed to see him as soon as possible, and he was in retrospect waiting for her to get to his place, all the while reading the business portion of the newspaper, Bastille's on his laps.

Bastille seemed to have been affected by Ana's disappearance as well. He often looked at the front door, apparently waiting for something, and when Bastille had always slept at the end of the bed, he now slept where Ana used to.

Mia arrived, holding a magazine in her hands, her school bag still hanging on her shoulder, and looking at Christian with apprehension. He greeted her, wondering what she could be worried about, and she slumped next to him, holding tightly the magazine in her hand.

"How are you?" She asked, apparently almost dreading the answer. Christian shook his dead, knowing that Mia treated him as if he was a time bomb ready to explode.

"Once again, Mia, I am fine. It was three weeks ago, it's in the past now."

She gauged him, doubting his words, before she gave him the magazine, explaining, "One of my friends was skimming through that earlier."

It was a tabloid, opened on the fourth page where he could see a picture of Ana smiling and locking arms with Paul Clayton. Just next to them, it could be read: '_Rising politician Paul Clayton has been seen with the socialite Anastasia Steele two days ago, leaving Eleven Madison Park. The new favourite for the next mayor of New York has been known to work with the controversial Raymond Steele and is now attacking a new front on his cause, homelessness. Cause that is very dear to the young brunette who opened a shelter a year ago in order to help those who have no roof. Anastasia has also been seen on several of Paul's speeches, and the two are known to have gone to several high society events together for the past couple of years. It seems that what started as a genuine friendship as blossomed into more."_

For a moment, Christian did not move nor said a word, simply staring at the picture displayed in front of him. If he was actually to use a single word at that precise moment, it would be anger. In fact, he had never felt angry in his life before. He was angry with the whole world, against the person who took the picture, against the person who wrote the article, against Mia who showed him the magazine, against Lauren who kept for herself what was happening between Ana and Paul, against Raymond who didn't care to share this new piece of information with him. And most of all, he was angry with Ana.

He knew that she would eventually move on, but he never expected her to move on so quickly. It wasn't that he had expected her to cry in a corner and mourn the loss of their relationship, but he didn't expect her to jump on to the next guy in barely a couple of months after their breakups. Especially when that guy was _Pau__l freaking Clayton_. Though he appreciated the man as a politician, the fact was, he was a politician, and Ana knew how he felt about that particular breed of people. In fact, she knew exactly how he felt about Paul. They had had several conversations about his dislike for the man when he had started becoming her regular plus one for her socialite events.

With a deep breath, he came back to the present moment, recalling Mia's presence and that she was not to blame for what was happening. She was simply the messenger, and Christian had this code of never letting his nerve loose on the messenger, no matter how bad the news could get. She probably simply wanted to give him a heads up, so he wouldn't lose control if he stumbled upon them during the next gala held by the brunette.

With very calculated moves, he closed the magazine, and he said with a cold voice, "As I said, it's in the past. I am not concerned with what she does anymore."

"Bullshit!" Mia called out, apparently no longer caring if she was cautious and considerate or not.

Christian repressed himself from glaring at her, and kept his face unreadable, perfectly aware that she was more than right. He did care that she already moved on. And he cared even more that she moved on with _Paul Clayton _of all people. He knew that Ana had been faithful during the whole time they had been together, but he also knew that Paul had had his eyes on her since the first time he saw her, and probably couldn't wait to get the opportunity to be more than a friendly plus one to her.

"You know, I'm sure that if you talked to h—"

"She doesn't want to talk, Mia. And I will not beg for her to hear me out. She moved on, and so did I!"

And in a blunt movement that had nothing to do with reason, he leant and kissed her on the mouth. He couldn't tell what pushed him to do so. Maybe it was a part of him that wanted to hurt Ana by going after one of her friends, or maybe it was a part of him that simply wanted to prove to Mia that Ana didn't mean anything to him anymore, all he knew was that for the brief second the kiss lasted, it felt wrong.

Mia quickly jerked backwards, going further into the couch, her clear blue eyes wide open with shock.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know what took over me," Christian apologised, actually surprised himself by his move. He had never seen Mia as anything more than a friend, especially not a potential lover. Actually, now that he was thinking about, Mia was more like a sister to him than anything else. Though he never had siblings, he did feel closer to her than a friend, but without any romantic feelings involved. And that weird interaction that just happened between them just proved him right.

Mia gently shook her head, dismissing the whole incident as she wisely said, "This is not how you are going to move. We both know that 'you and I' is never going to happen."

"As I said, I don't know what happened to me," He retorted, not liking feeling like a little boy being patronisingly reprimanded.

Mia knowingly looked at him, keeping for herself what they both know was the truth, and simply got up, kissing Christian on the cheek and letting him know,

"I don't think I'll be able to make it Saturday night. But my friend Angela is free and a real doll. I'll let her know that I have a friend looking for a plus one."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

When Christian got to the room, his eyes immediately went looking for Ana. Even though he had a date at his arms that would probably like his attention to be set on her, he scanned the room, looking for Ana's recognisable chestnut hair. They were at a gala that she had organised in order to uproot the homeless. It was actually the second year in the row she was doing it, but the difference with the previous year was that she and Christian were no longer in a relationship.

He could remember how excited she had been the year before when she had organised everything. And Christian couldn't help but be bitter as he wondered if Paul had witnessed the same thing this year. This was something that he had hoped would only be between Ana and him, but of course, that was when he thought they would build a life together.

As soon as his eyes landed on Ana, he ostentatiously reached for his date, thanking Mia for insisting that he would take her friend as his plus one. In fact, now that he was seeing Ana so happy at the arms of her suitor, he even started considering the aftermath of the gala, recalling how Mia said that simply wishing to move on wasn't enough. After all, Ana took actions in order to move on, so he needed to do the same.

With a deep breath, he turned his head to the woman at his arm who brightly smiled to him. She was a young redhead, the same age as Mia, though Mia was taller than her. Her dark eyes were wide and holding a twinkle that promised a lot of fun, despite the fact that she was still sporting a babyface. Mia had warned Christian that Angela was not looking for anything more than some fun at the moment, which -as Mia pointed out- was perfect for Christian. Of course, she had used words much more girly such as rebound and mourn the relationship, but Christian barely listened to her.

He was brought back to reality by Raymond walking to him, holding his hand to Angela. He politely kissed it, all the while commenting on Mia's replacement at Christian's arm, "Has something happened to Mia?"

"She is alright. But I took her friend Angela as my date, today," Christian responded, looking straight into his boss's eyes.

He actually never introduced Mia as his date before, and, in fact, he never brought any date to any sort of social events. And even though Raymond never commented on it, he knew that the man had taken notice of this habit. So for him to introduce someone as his date, and not simply his plus one had a big impact. He wasn't sure why he decided to do so, though a part of him wondered if it wasn't so he could officialise in a way the doom of his relationship with Ana and move on.

Raymond looked at Christian, his black eyes boring into him as if he was searching for his soul before he returned his attention to Angela who didn't seem to have the slightest idea of what just happened, or what she had gotten herself into.

Raymond stayed with them for an hour or so, though Christian could tell his attention was on his daughter, just like his own. Though he talked to Angela and did not forget about her, he still had the brunette in the corner of his eye. When she laughed out loud at some point of the evening, Raymond snapped his head to her, glaring at her suitor as he mumbled to Christian,

"I don't like this."

Christian did not say anything, though he couldn't agree more. And just when Raymond was about to go to his daughter, she walked up to them, all smiles in her blue dress. She did not spare a glance at Christian, but Christian still saw something that did not help him move on. She was wearing his necklace. The one he had gotten her for Christmas.

To be honest, there hadn't been a single day since that Christmas when he didn't see her with the jewel, but he hadn't seen her since the separation, and he had assumed that she would have gotten rid of the necklace. But there it was, on her neck, complimenting the neckline of her dress.

She only staid long enough to tell her father that someone was looking for him, and then hurried back to her date, not even bothering to introduce herself to Angela. Raymond followed her, leaving Christian with his own date, and when a couple of more hours passed by, he whispered in her ear, asking her if she wanted to go back to his place.

And though he was the one who had initiated the idea, the closer they were driving to his place, the less he wanted to take Angela to his room. It had nothing to do with her. In fact, she was very attractive, and she had a brain of her own. But it didn't feel right. And the more he thought about it, the more he felt like he was actually cheating on Ana. Which in itself he knew was crazy. They were no longer together, he didn't owe her any sort of commitment anymore. Especially when she was going on her merry way herself.

When he arrived in front of his building, he had no single desire to bring the girl upstairs. And before he could even try to conjure an excuse to simply bring her to her place, she bluntly asked,

"Are you gay?"

"Pardon me?" He asked, slightly destabilised from this line of questioning. She shrugged, her dark eyes carefully analysing his face as she explained,

"Well, I don't want to brag or anything, but guys are usually all over me, and you didn't even try to grope me once. And you did take a few detours so we would take longer to get here. I do believe that some men are gentlemen, but ... at the end of the day, you are just men ..."

Christian repressed a smirk, wondering if Mia's natural instincts were actually simply good lawyer's observations mixed with some feminine instincts.

"To answer your question, I am not gay," Christian simply said, before he added, "But it is true that I don't particularly look forward to taking you upstairs, though it has nothing to do with you or your gender."

"So there is a girl in your mind," She knowingly said, nodding her head with understanding. Then she turned her face to Christian, and brightly announced, "Well, if you ever want a fun night, you know where to find me. Even if it's just taking me out to a lovely party. But now, I'd like to go home."

On those words, Christian drove her back to her place, internally appreciating that Angela was not a terrible person, to begin with. He was even thinking that he would take her word for it and might actually ask her to come with him to the next events. He had had fun with her, though she wasn't as fun and natural as Mia.

Once he dropped her off, he drove to the gym instead of his own place and rushed to a boxing bag where he finally let his anger out. Each blow that he gave was forceful and full of rage, whilst he wished all along that it had been Paul's face instead of the bag. Though Ana had kept to a minimum her interactions with the politician, Christian still remembered every time he saw the blond man touch her as if nothing, slipping his hand on her smaller back.

In all honesty, the only thing that had stopped Christian from actually making a scene at the gala was that, no matter how bad they fell apart, he still respected Ana. And he knew how much the charity meant for her, so he kept his dark thoughts and instincts for himself. In fact, not even the prospect of a dumbfounded and angry Raymond had come to his mind. But he had kept himself in check, not wanting to create another disagreement between them.

Still, as he endlessly and restlessly pushed the bag, a thought came to Christian, making him punch even harder. Paul was about to spend the night with Ana, while he couldn't even bring himself to get a willing girl in his bed. Maybe Ana had moved on, but he wasn't ready, nor willing to do the same.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

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💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚**So, I am going to be honest, I am SOOOO excited for you to read the next chapter. I can't wait to put it online for you to read it ... It's going to be from Mia's PoV again, and ... you will ... well, you will see, haha**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So how are you feeling about Christian?**

**💚 What do you think of Mia in this chapter? How she reacted to that kiss, sort of?**

**💚 So Ana is with Paul? What do you think about that?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	61. Chapter 59: Impromptu Visitors

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Mia's PoV **

As she got into her apartment Mia realised that it had been a week since she had seen or her from Christian. But she wasn't worried that much about it. She knew he was still trying to get to terms with the end of his relationship with Ana, and he ended up working even more than he did before. Still, she was rather happy when she heard from Jose that Christian didn't turn into a ruthless tyrant in his side activities. Apparently, he was more intense, but his attitude did not change from how he used to be before.

Angela had a long talk with her on the night of the gala, half complaining- half thanking her for the night. A part of the redhead was glad that Christian had been gentleman enough to not let his frustrations on her, the other part was frustrated to have been refused a night with a good looking man. She actually tried to take out of Mia who was Christian's girlfriend, but Mia remained loyal to her friend.

In fact, her loyalty to Christian had some consequences toward her friendship with Ana. The two girls hadn't seen each other since the breakup, with Mia always coming up with excuses to not see the brunette. Mia didn't go as far as to hate the girl, but she did have a lot of resentment toward her. She couldn't get over the fact that Ana broke Christian's heart without any apparent reason. Because of the cold way she broke it off, Mia had to see Christian in a state she never thought she would see him in, and she couldn't get past that it was all Ana's fault.

Still, she didn't ostracise her friend all together and still stayed in contact with her via texts and messages, doing her best to respect Christian's wish and not let Ana know that she was aware of the relationship she had with him. But that did not stop Mia from nudging her friend from time to time for him to follow her instincts and call Ana on her bullshit.

She knew that Ana never confided in her about her couple with Christian, but she still talked about the guy she was seeing, and it seemed to Mia's eyes that Ana had been in love with the guy, incidentally Christian.

Mia was suddenly torn out of her wandering thoughts about her friends by the doorbell ringing. She furrowed her brows, not expecting any visit since Jose and Ethan were in Seattle visiting Kate at the moment. She went to open the door, only to find Ana who seemed on the verge to tears. She hastened her inside, worry colouring her blue eyes as she inquired,

"You okay?"

Ana shook her head, walking to the sofa, and sat there, bringing her knees to her chest and rocking back and forth. When Mia sat next to her, waiting for her friend to explain what happened to her, the brunette said with a very small voice,

"I think I'm pregnant."

Though her first thoughts should give been for her friend in need and in distress, Mia couldn't help but think of Christian at this moment. She may have not known a lot of things about him, but the one thing she was sure of was that he wanted to be a father. He never actually said those words to her, but she could tell by the way he would talk about parenthood that it was something he was eager to start.

And now, his ex-girlfriend whom he still loved showed up at the door, claiming that she might be pregnant. She looked into the distraught eyes of the brunette and asked,

"Are you sure? Did you go to the doctor to check?"

"_I can't_! If Dad finds out, he will lose his shit. But I've missed my periods for two months now."

"Does Paul know?" Mia coyly inquired, knowing that it was the best way to ask if it was Christian's, without revealing her knowledge concerning Ana's ex. Ana blinked, looking confused for a moment before she admitted,

"It's not Paul's."

"How can you be sure?"

"We never had sex."

Mia kept her surprise to herself, but she still wondered if Ana wasn't only with Paul as a rebound relationship. She thought that it would make sense because it seemed so strange to her that Ana would date _Paul_ of all people, so shortly after breaking off her relationship of two years.

"But ... haven't you been with him since ... a while?" She poked around, and Ana simply shrugged, keeping her eyes down as she muttered,

"Yeah. But I didn't feel like going there so far."

Mia stopped herself for asking more about it, recognising that the priority at this moment was to provide her friend with support and comfort instead of harassing her with questions. She cleared her throat and let the brunette know,

"Well, I think you should take a test first. Maybe you're just stressed, and it's nothing."

"I don't want Dad to know anything about this. And if I go in a drugstore to buy a _pregnancy test_, Lauren is going to rat on me for sure."

"I'll buy the test," Mia propose, feeling bad for Ana who couldn't have a decent private life without her father interfering. In fact, she was amazed that she and Christian managed to hide their relationship for two years.

"But Ana, ... What if you _are_ pregnant?"

She hoped that Ana wasn't going to ask her to keep the secret because she didn't feel like keeping from Christian this kind of information. Ana burst in tears, making Mia's worries all disappear at once, now only concerned about making her friend feel better.

She scooted closer to the brunette and hugged her, giving her the comfort she was seeking. Once Ana's sobs became more sparse, she said with wisdom,

"I think this would be a much better conversation if you had it with your ex, instead of me."

"No," The brunette protested. "He's an idiot and I know exactly what he'll do if I end up being pregnant indeed."

Mia kept for herself that of course, Christian would do the right thing. This was exactly what he wanted, even if those weren't the circumstances he would have ideally wanted. He wanted to marry Ana, and more importantly, he wanted children. But now that Ana was being so vehement on not telling Christian anything of her worries, she wondered if maybe her refusal to his proposal was actually a genuine refusal. She had no doubts that Ana knew that Christian would recognise the child and provide for the two of them in the best way he could, but maybe Ana didn't see herself with Christian after all.

"You can't tell _anyone_ Mia!" Ana supplicated, panic on her face, and the blonde promised that she wouldn't. "Not even Christian! I know you're friends with him, but if you tell him, he'll go rat on me to Dad."

Once again, Mia promised, though she wondered if Ana genuinely didn't want her father to know, or if she was keeping this from Christian as well. And then, she found herself asking inwardly if Ana was naive enough to think that she would be able to hide a pregnancy from the two men who cared the most for her in the world. Whether she kept the baby or not, the two mobsters were bound to find out, one way or another.

She got up, refocusing on the present, and let the teary brunette know, "Let me pop by the drugstore, I'll be back in twenty minutes."

Ana nodded, and Mia left to go buy the pregnancy test, unpleasantly brought back to the days she was a working girl, scared of seeing the little plus sign after just a few days of tardiness. No matter the protections that she and the girls used, there was a false (or verified) alarm at least once a month. And now, there she was, anxiety knotting her stomach whilst buying a little stick that could change her friend's life forever.

On her way back, she stopped by the grocery shop and bought a pint of glass, fully aware that no matter the outcome, it would be well received and consumed within the next hour.

When she came back, she found Ana in the same position she left her in, though she had her phone in her hand now, and was fixing it, thousand of thoughts written in her eyes. As soon as she walked closer to her, Ana snapped her head to her, and got to her feet, taking the little box and rushing to the bathroom. Mia set up the ice-cream with only two spoons and waited on the couch for Ana to come back. Which she did just a minute later, holding the stick by the tip of her fingers.

"I think you should tell the Dad, Ana," Mia said as the brunette sat next to her.

"Well, if I am pregnant, I won't have a choice now, will I? But I'm not telling him as long as I'm not sure."

"_Why_?"

"We didn't really have a nice and smooth breakup. If I tell him now, this is going to bring up some issues and involve some sacrifices that … Well, if I can avoid it, I will."

Mia kept silent, though she took note that it seemed to be more than simple childishness in Ana's refusal. Weirdly enough, she didn't seem to think that her being with Christian would be a good thing, even though the man was mad for her, and would do about anything to give her the world.

"So … does anyone else knows?" Ana shook her head, staring at the stick and willing it to reveal its secret. "Not even Kate."

"Phone calls can be traced. And, you're the only person I trust in town, Mia. I know I can trust you."

"And yet, you keep on not listening to me and refusing to go talk to your ex," The blonde snapped, though she kept her sarcastic part about Ana not trusting her enough to confide to her about her relationship to Christian.

Ana glared at her, not the least in the world in the mood to put up with Mia's relentless campaign to get her to talk to Christian. "And what if he was some abusive son-of-a-bitch? Would you still try to get me to talk to him?!"

"Don't be ridiculous Ana. We both know he wasn't. I know you'd never take a punch without giving back twice. And you'd never stay with that kind of an asshole, anyway."

"Maybe. But that doesn't mean I'm going to go and talk to him."

"Why did you guys even break up, to begin with?"

Ana seemed to think about it for a second, before she ranted, "He's an idiot." Mia raised a doubtful eye. "He's just a plain idiot. I'm not even sure if he actually loved me to begin with. The whole situation was messed up. It's all my fault to think I could have something with ... _a guy like him_."

"If the guy stayed two years with you, you —"

"What is it to you anyway?" Ana snapped, cutting her off. "Aren't you supposed to be _my_ friend? You don't even know him."

Mia didn't retort anything to that, keeping her promise to Christian, but she could tell Ana wasn't really over Christian. No one would get that upset about someone that made them indifferent. She could even tell that Ana was angry at Christian, and though Mia's allegiance went to Christian, she could understand the brunette's anger. She knew her friend, she knew that Christian was a cold and undemonstrative person, and it seemed that Ana was tired to put up with it to guess his feelings for her.

The two of them fell silent, before they both looked at the stick on the table at the same time, looking at the little blue sign now clear on it.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚** So, … I'm back with those clifffies, haha. I missed them …. SO MUCH **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So is Ana pregnant?**

**💚 What do you think of Mia in this chapter? Do you think she will tell Christian?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana right now? Just curious**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	62. Chapter 60: Hospital Bed Wishes

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 60****: Hospital Bed Wishes (2,0K)**

💚** So this chapter will have a slight jump in time even though I know you don't want it, this is how it was planned in my head. And I know it is shorted, but it is also just a day and a half after the other one. So …. Bear with me. **

💚 **ALSO, this review came on the other version and summed up the story to the T! Congrats to whoever wrote it! Remember that we only have Christian's point-of-view, and you're always more inclined to be nicer to the person relating the story, no matter how wrong they are. "**_God I'm tired of people being so hateful towards Ana. Christian killed her uncle, Sawyer and lots of other people. He gets aggressive when he's angry or doesn't get what he wants. He knows what happened to her mom and brother, but he keeps his mouth shut. He's not really talkative. He's a frigging mobster. As long as he doesn't change his behaviour, she will never fully trust him! Isn't that kind of normal? Of course, he loves her, but not in a very healthy way. When someone 'hurt' her, he'll probably kill the person. Soon he'll replace Raymond and that the situation only worsens. Ana is trying to be a good person so she doesn't want to get involved in all of this. She can't keep ignoring it. Show some understanding. (For both sides ofc, it's not that I hate Christian, I could never, but I'm done with the hate towards Ana)_**" And I do read and agree with all the other reviews, don't worry (well mostly agree), but this one describes my feelings the best. Also, for those who felt Mia a bit OOC last chapter, remember that Ana was distraught. No matter how much you'd like to call your friends out, you're still human, and there are times to do so. Mia doesn't hate Ana, and she was there for her friend because at that moment, Ana as a person needed her more than Christian, or than Clace as a couple.**

💚** That being said, please do review guys, because it really fuels me and helps me stay longer at night to write and finish this story. I still have quite a few chapters, and the more support I get, the faster I want to write. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV **

As the weeks passed after the breakup and turned into months, Christian painfully realised how much Ana had become part of his life. Even though he never talked to her about his work, she still had been in his mind, and even a calming thought when things got irritating at times. The idea that she would be waiting for him at his place or the notion that he could go pay her a visit if he missed her was something that he missed dearly. He also missed her laugh, the smile she would have when she would see him cross the threshold go his apartment, the sweet little texts she would send at random, her little attentions she had for him and thought he never noticed, like always wearing the bracelet he got her when she would see him, or wearing blue to every event she went when she knew he would come as well, or how she learnt to cook just so she could make him something he liked to eat.

Often he would think back to all those times he had been with Ana, and think that he ought to be more verbal. He knew that Ana was a romantic, no matter tough and open she could be, she was still a romantic at heart. And reflecting back on how he had been, he didn't give her much of what she wanted. Sure he had several bursts of romantic gesture for her, each always very well received, but he never made a habit out of them. And this resulted in him missing her every day.

Still, he never shared that with anyone and even less shown it. He actually swallowed any sort of feeling he could feel and went on with his life. Even though Mia pressed him, again and again, to talk to Ana and 'deal with things as responsible people'. He was perfectly aware that his ego was playing a great part of them no longer speaking, but he still blamed Ana for it. After all, he did try to talk to her, and she refused him twice. He was not going to lower himself and beg for a third denial. If she wanted to talk, she knew where he lived.

And it was with this mentality that Christian kept his life going. He ignored the heartbreak when their second anniversary came, trying to forgo the painful memory of the playful banter they had over which date qualified as such; and now that Christmas was nearing, he was doing his best to not think of how he wished she would be there with him. He solely focused on work, and Ryan was the one who suffered from it.

As he would work more, he would take Ryan with him as well, depriving him of the company of his brand new wife, and making him complain more than once about it. Not that Christian really cared. If he was supposed to take over, and Ryan was supposed to be his number two, he needed Ryan to be as prepared as he was at that moment.

The two of them were in Mexico, just a few days before Christmas when he received a call from an unknown American number. As the phone rang, flashing this foreign number to Christian, he tried to figure out who it could be, but he still picked up the call, curiosity taking the better of him.

"Mr Grey?"

"Who's asking?"

"This is the Presbyterian Hospital. We are calling you in regards to you being listed as Mr Raymond Steele's emergency contact. He has been admitted just an hour ago for heart failure."

"I'll be there in the morning," He assured, knowing that it was around six in the evening in New York.

He didn't even wait for an answer from the receptionist and was already packing his suitcase, using his phone to call Ryan. Ryan did not pick up, but there was a knock on the door just a minute afterwards that revealed Ryan, smirking at Christian as he said,

"Since when did you get so lazy you can't even walk eleven steps in the corridor. I counted Christian, it's not that much."

Christian dismissed that taunt, closing his suitcase and putting his coat on, "I'm heading back to New York. You deal with Gonzalez and make sure to remind that next time he tries to screw me over, I won't be nice and generous."

"Everything alright?" Ryan asked, seeing the seriousness in Christian's face.

"Just have to be in New York. I'll see you there in two days. Don't forget to remind him. Make him feel like he's lucky to only be dealing with you, and not me," Christian instructed, before leaving the hotel room, with Ryan in it.

He had no doubts that Ryan would be able to deal with the crisis on his own. After all, if it hadn't been for him preparing Ryan to become like him, he would have gone on his own. It was simply a petty drug dealer who was trying to take more than he can chew. This was something common, people always tried to screw others, but Christian always made sure that they wouldn't try twice.

In the flight to New York, his thoughts wandered to Raymond being in a hospital bed, and a ball of anxiety grew in his stomach. No matter how much he liked to pretend that he was fazed by nothing, he still had to admit that he was more than fond of Raymond. As much as he liked to pretend that he made himself without anyone's help, he still had to admit that Raymond had become a father figure to him. And as much as he liked to pretend that death never affected him, he knew he wouldn't be able to cope with Raymond's. He wasn't ready to be without the man, whether it was as a mentor, as a friend, or as a father figure.

So it was with those dark thoughts that Christian took a cab to the hospital and rushed to Raymond's room as soon as the reception gave him a number. It was actually still the middle of the night, just before one, and he surprisingly saw Ana outside the room, alongside Paul who was holding her in his arms, trying to give her comfort. Christian clenched his jaw at the sight but rendered his face impassive as soon as Ana looked up, her eyes red and teary.

They looked at each other for what seemed to last forever, and at this moment, all Christian wanted to do was to take her in his arms and assure her that all would be okay. But before he could even try to act on his impulse, a doctor came out of the room and announced, "You can go and see him now."

Ana rushed inside the room, disregarding Paul who had the delicacy to simply stay outside whilst Christian walked in after her. He watched as Raymond hugged his daughter, shaking his head and assuring her,

"It's nothing sweetheart. I'm just getting old."

Ana burst in tears, hugging her father tighter in his arms, and Christian only noticed then that she was wearing a fancy dress. Which meant she had probably been on her way to a date when she received the call. And then he remembered that Paul had a rally in the afternoon, where Ana had probably been, showing her support to the blond man.

Raymond patted his daughter's back with love, though his brown vivid eyes were on Christian, a bit of curiosity in there. When Ana's sobs softened, he took her face in his hands and wiped the tears away before he told her,

"The doctor said I would be back on my feet first thing in the morning. Just go home and wait for me there, alright?"

Ana nodded before she hugged her father once again and he lovingly kissed her on her forehead. The two men watched the redhead leave the room, and they saw through the window how Paul talked to her before wrapping his arm around her shoulder and walking her away.

"I don't like this," Raymond said, his voice echoing with a slight anger that contrasted with the love he just displayed a few seconds ago.

"You already said," Christian simply replied, because this was a phrase that Raymond would often tell Christian during the past few months. As if Christian had any saying in this! If he had, Ana would never even had talked to the blond politician.

"It has been going on for too long. Six, seven months …" Raymond shook his head before looking straight into Christian's eyes, "Get rid of him. He had his fun, but my daughter deserves much better."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. Get rid of that politician clawing at my daughter. I promised her _I _wouldn't interfere in her 'love' life, so you have to do it," Raymond explained, everything in his tone telling Christian that he was serious.

"If I get rid of him, you will need another horse in the race," Christian pointed out, though he was far from minding getting rid of Paul. In fact, it had been a fantasy of him, and he already had several scenarios in mind that would procure him great pleasure.

"Don't be so morbid. Just make sure he stays away from my daughter. As I said, she deserves better."

Christian nodded, though he had to admit that he was disappointed to not be able to go as far as he would have wanted. He leant against the wall, crossing his arms and looking at Raymond as he asked, gesturing toward the whole hospital room,

"So what happened?"

"As I said, I am simply getting old. Ana is going to be on my back from now on. She's been telling me to quit salt and fatty food."

Christian smirked, recalling the times he witnessed Ana tracking Raymond's diet like a guard-dog.

"I wouldn't have expected to see you on my deathbed, though. Especially when you were in another country and on a mission," Raymond noticed with a small smile on his own.

"Don't be ridiculous, Raymond. I am not as cold as you think."

"Sometimes I wonder."

Christian shrugged, not really caring if people thought of him as heartless or not, but before he could bounce on something else, Raymond told him,

"You know, sometimes being indifferent to the ones you care hurt more than a few misplaced words. Indifference is a great weapon that people use without even realising it."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚** So, in case it wasn't clear, it has been seven months since the breakup, and Ana is clearly not showing any baby bump... **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So do you think Raymond will leave until the end of the story?**

**💚 What do you think Christian will do with Paul?**

**💚 What do you think of Raymond?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	63. Chapter 61: The Importance of Ana

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 61****: The Importance of Ana (2,1K)**

**‼️IF YOU'RE A GUEST REVIEWER**

**CHECK AT THE END****‼️**

💚** So about last chapter and reviews. I would never EVER say that Ana is right and that she is the victim. But the thing is, Christian isn't as well. And I think that is why I like this story so much. The characters are all flawed. They are humans like you and me. No one is perfect in this story. They all have some kind of flaw, and I always like a flawed character better than a perfect one. I transcribed the review because EVERYONE is having a go at Ana and putting Christian on a pedestal when I think they should be treated equally. We don't have her point-of-view, we don't know how it feels for her, we don't know how Christian treats her from her perspective. To give you a fair example, you don't know how you treat/talk to people because you are blurred by your own perspective. Same with my characters. I simply want to make them as real as possible. That being said, this is not a rant or anything, just me explaining how I feel about this story and those characters. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Paul's PoV **

As Paul looked down on his phone, checking the reply Ana had just sent him concerning their plans for the evening, Jack Hyde sat next to him, ordering a strong liquor. Strangely enough, the two men had only started seeing each other a lot just as Paul had gotten more important in Ana's life. He knew that the brunette and Jack were acquainted since childhood, and even good friends when times were rough, and their relationship grew as Paul spent more and more time with Ana.

It turned out that even out of a strictly professional point-of-view, his relationship with Jack benefited Paul, who mostly always had his career in mind. After all, he did not go as far as he did and made the sacrifices he made just for his hard work to be crumbled by some unfortunate decisions.

This was actually one of the things he liked the most about Ana. Taking a rational decision based on logic never put her off. Making sure that she would show up at a precise moment when he would make a speech, or mentioning his name whilst she was doing her own charities never bothered her. Though if he had to be honest, a little bit of spontaneity from her would have been much appreciated.

He didn't mind the long months of abstinence she had put on him, or the fact that she never slept at his place, or the lack of public display of affection. But sometimes, it felt like they were more a commercial than a couple. She still talked to him and made sure to kiss him whenever they would see each other, she still invited her as her date when she was being a socialite, and she still gave him fun. But these weren't really what made a great couple. Great friends maybe, but not a great couple.

"So, there is this new movie coming up, and I know Ana wants to go to the premiere. It's on the tenth. Maybe you should propose that to her," Jack proposed, tearing Paul out his thoughts. Paul grimaced, realising that this came at the worst possible date.

"I have a rally on the tenth." It was true that he rarely did anything that didn't benefit him in his career, even when it came to his couple with Ana. It wasn't much that he didn't care for her, just that she wasn't the priority. And maybe she was starting to get fed up with it, which was why she wasn't trying to really deepen their relationship and even seemed as if she was distancing herself from it.

"And anyway, I think I should keep our public appearances to a minimum. Raymond has been rather cold lately," He added. In all honesty, he was actually surprised that Raymond never even tried to have a talk with him concerning his beloved daughter. He wasn't naive like Ana and knew perfectly well that the odds of Luca Mazerati dying in his sleep just after he started befriending the brunette were really slim.

"Raymond would _never_ stand in Ana's way, don't be ridiculous," Jack chastised.

"You haven't been around him lately. He and Christian have been so … off-putting shall I say."

Jack shook his head, dismissing Paul's uneasy feeling, but that did not change Paul's mind on the matter the slightest. He had this sort of feeling that the two men were not that fond of him ever since he and Ana started dating.

"Christian is just naturally cold. I don't think I ever saw him genuinely smile. You're thinking too much into it. Raymond loves his daughter too much to make a scene. And he would have killed your career if he was so bothered by the two of you. He already did it before, and I don't think he would not do it again just because of you."

Paul nodded, more because he didn't want to go into a pointless debate rather than because he agreed with Jack. He was actually saved from going further into this conversation by Ana finally answering his text, saying that she would gladly have dinner with him.

Without further notice, he took a leaf from Jack and took a cab to the restaurant where Ana said she would wait for him in. There he found her at a secluded table, texting probably one of her friends and she waved at him as soon as she saw him, genuinely smiling.

If he had to be honest, Paul had always found Ana very attractive. She was a beautiful woman who had a sort of genuine and almost innocent sex-appeal to her advantage. And though he never really complained about it, it still frustrated him a bit from time to time that he still hadn't gone further than second base with her. He respected the fact that she wasn't ready for that kind of intimacy, and he was not going to lie, it did help his political image that he was being a thoughtful gentleman since he was sporting the traditional values of family in his campaign.

But when she was as radiant as she was this night those were the moments he wished he could take her home straight away and spend the night worshipping her body.

When he sat next to her, they briefly kissed, though she slipped her hand in his, and she let him know,

"I've already ordered. They make this really delicious dish here that you _have_ to try."

"Does it involve meat?" He teased, and he was rewarded by the exact expression he had expected Ana to have, she scolded at him.

After her father's heart attack, Ana had become obsessed with his health and basically forced him to turn vegan, because some doctor she met told her that it was the better alternative. And being the loving daughter that she was, she followed her father in this new diet that she had imposed him.

Which resulted in Paul aways having a little joke about eating meat or dairy when they would meet. In his opinion, Ana was being blinded by some crook with a fancy degree and good recommendations, but she was too stubborn to listen to him.

"So I was thinking … I am going to visit my parents the weekend after the next. I'm sure they would love to see you again."

"In Washington?"

Paul nodded, watching carefully Ana's face to analyse her reaction. This was something he often struggled with. Being a politician, and naturally playing with words, he was used to reading people's minds and feelings on their faces or their voice fluctuations, but Ana was always a conundrum. She had this way to always keep for herself and conceal any thoughts she would have from the world.

"Yeah … I guess it would be nice to see your Mom again," She finally said, with a small smile and Paul leant over the table to gently kiss her lips, cupping her face in the process.

When they broke their kiss, she announced with a small broken voice, "In fact, I think we should use the opportunity of this weekend to take the next step in our couple."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Paul's PoV**

When Paul got home after his dinner with Ana, he was on cloud nine. Ana had just given him the go for the next step. Though a part of him was a bit worried about her lack of excitement as well. He wondered if, behind all this facade of outspoken and fun girl, Ana was maybe a virgin. And though the idea of being her first one was appealing, he wished it wasn't the case. It felt like too much pressure to be that person to her.

He pondered a second between working a bit or going straight to bed, but any plans got cancelled when he saw Christian sitting in his sofa, looking straight in his eyes with a cold and unreadable face. It took Paul a second to recollect his calm face and let the small fright go away, and his brain immediately racked, trying to find out why Christian was here.

As a politician, or as a simple man, it was never good to have a mobster waiting for you in your own house. Generally, your lifespan was about to become incredibly shorter when it happened. For a long moment, none of them said a word, Paul hating the feeling to feel uncomfortable like that in his own home.

"How was your evening?" Christian finally asked, his voice calm an collected, as usual.

"Rather pleasant. May I ask what you are doing in my apartment?"

Christian looked straight into Paul's eyes, before slowly getting up, pacing in the living room and going to stand by the window as he said, "I was thinking of something lately. Something you told me when we first met. Do you remember?"

"I said many things when we first met."

"Something about you being smart."

Paul did not reply anything, though he could remember this conversation really well. It had happened in Washington and it was when he was trying to convince Christian to help him on the greasy ladder that was politics.

Christian turned his head, his eyes boring once more into Paul's as he asked with a small smirk, "Let me ask you, then. Are you being smart at the moment?"

He swallowed with all the difficulty in the world, watching the mobster in front of him revel in his obvious discomfort. Christian's smirk grew a bit wider as he added,

"Let me be clear. You are nothing to me. Just some dirty politician who simply understands the game a bit better than others. Whether you are here or not, means nothing to me. And it used to mean nothing to Raymond as well. But then you got greedy and took things that weren't yours to take. So let me ask you again, are you being smart at the moment?"

Once again, Paul swallowed hardly, Christian having taken a small step to him, making him feel like an easily squish-able bug for a moment. But then he found some ounce of courage and said, "So Raymond sends you instead of telling me himself?"

"Raymond? He doesn't even know I am here. He would never do anything to upset his daughter. _I_, on the other hand, I have no trouble redirecting her life where it should be. And it certainly isn't with you."

"What if she wants to?" He asked defiantly, though he was feeling anything but brave at the moment.

"Then ask yourself. Which is more important? Ana or your career?"

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚** So, the next chapter will have a rather big time jump. Just so you know. And it will be another character point-of-view as well. **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So do you think Paul will break up with Ana?**

**💚 What did you think of Christian in this chapter?**

**💚 What do you think of Ana's and Paul's relationship? And why do you think Ana is holding back?****?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	64. Chapter 62: Tombé Pour Elle

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 62****: Tombé Pour Elle (3,6K)**

💚** I think we have two more chapters, and then the (very short) epilogue …. Excited? I am, haha**

**💚 As for the Ana PoV, everyone wants, remember I warned you that this was a Christian story and that the one Ana PoV we had was the one and only**

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**Jack's PoV **

Jack had been visiting one of his friend from Seattle who just had a baby, and was now at the airport, waiting for his plane to be ready to go back home. This was one of the perks of being loaded more than necessary. Luxuries like a private plane were things of the ordinary for him. Of course, it used to belong to his father, so he could run his double life inconspicuously, but he was full-on appreciating having the responsibility of it now.

As he was wandering aimlessly in the airport, in search of something to do to kill the time, he spotted a wave of recognisable chestnut hair in a duty-free shop. He perched his head up, making sure it was the right brunette, and as soon as he confirmed it, he marched to her, making her jump out of fright when he surprised her from behind.

"Geez, Jack! There are better ways to make my heart race, you know!" She complained, half laughing whilst she playfully slapped his chest.

Jack simply smiled, seeing from the corner of his eye that Ana's everlasting bodyguard was just a few aisles away from them, pretending to not look at them.

"Did you just visit Kate?"

"Yes. I feel like Kate is never going back to New York. Crazy her likes better rainy Seattle. Go figure," She said with disbelief and a bit of sadness in her tone.

Ever since Katherine had followed Elliott to Seattle for his last year of uni, Ana had clearly been missing her friend, even more, when Mia was not always available to go out. Which ultimately brought Jack and her closer. For instance, Jack knew that Ana had never been really serious about Paul. She mostly went out with him because she was trying to move on from her ex (the mystery guy who had no name, no face and no nationalities). Which was probably why she took him breaking up with her two months ago so very lightly. She hadn't been bothered about it at all.

But in all honesty, since a few months ago, Jack was starting to see Ana as much than just a friend. And now that she was free of Paul, he was wondering how he could make his move without ruining their friendship.

"Maybe you'd like to share a ride with me, instead of taking the regular plane."

Ana seemed to ponder on the idea, clearly interested, before she heaved, "Wherever I go, _she_ has to come as well."

"There is space, don't worry."

He knew that Ana has never been fond of Lauren, no matter how discrete the woman was, Ana didn't like the idea of being followed round the clock like a child. And Jack wouldn't be surprised if Ana stopped travelling abroad was for the very same reason. It had been a year and a half since she went to Italy, and since the further she went was LA, with her father.

He walked Ana toward the waiting room assigned to his plane, subtly followed by Lauren, and informed the steward of the two additional passengers for his return to New York. As they were served champagne, Ana wondered out loud,

"I wonder why Dad doesn't have his own one. I would travel every week if he had a plane."

"Maybe that's why. He doesn't want you to live everywhere but near him," Jack joked, earning a frank laugh from Ana.

The two of them talked a bit about what they each did in Seattle as they walked to the plane, silently followed by Lauren. It wasn't until they were far up in the air and that a few glasses of champagne had gone through their system that Jack found the courage to tell the brunette what has been on his mind for a while,

"So … I know you and Paul just broke up, but … well, I have been thinking more and more that he was a lucky bastard whilst he was with you."

Ana stared at him, her blue eyes not showing a single emotion. This was something she was really good at, hiding her feelings to the world. Still, nothing in her body language indicated to Jack that he should immediately stop, so he went on,

"To be honest, right now, all I want to do is lean forward and kiss you. But I also don't want to ruin our friendship."

Slowly, Ana put her glass of champagne down, before she got up and took the seat next to Jack, reminding him, "You _do_ know why Paul and I didn't work, don't you?"

"I know. But I'm not Paul, I can work with that," He assured.

He had no doubts that Paul never felt like Ana and he connected, and this was the reason he never really tried to push the relationship further. And he knew why Ana held back, she was still bruised by whatever happened with her ex. She never really explained what happened between them, just that things ended badly, and he could tell that still today she was thinking about it.

Though she never said anything about it, Jack was sure that the necklace that never left her neck was from her ex. The way she would hold it sometimes or the way she perpetually had it hinted at him that this particular piece of jewellery meant a lot to her.

Ana looked sad for a moment, before regaining control of herself and letting him know, "The thing is … I know I should move on because he's obviously not right for me but … I _can't_."

"Then let me help you with that," Jack said, closing the gap between them and kissing her on the lips.

His kiss was hesitant, letting her the possibility to back away, and for a second, he felt her hesitation leaning toward that option. But in the end, she gave in and kissed him back, deepening their kiss, and surrendering all control she had over herself.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jack's PoV**

It had been six months since Ana and Jack had started dating, and Jack was starting to fear the repercussions of this relationship. When they had started this couple, both of them simply acted on an impulse. But now, he was starting to fall for Ana. And it wasn't much her father that frightened Jack, but the ghost of her ex.

No matter how much more invested Ana was in him than she had been in Paul, Jack could still tell that her ex was lingering on her heart. _No matter what_. And the more they spent time together, the more he felt like he was dating someone who was torn between a dead lover and a present one. Ana never wanted to talk about her ex, so Jack imagined him as a dead soldier, someone he would never be able to replace, probably Ana's first true love. But that didn't mean he didn't have space in her heart either.

He could tell that he was starting to become more and more important to the brunette despite her many ways to try to keep their relationship as casual as possible. For instance, she never spent the night at his place. Sure they had sex more than once, especially since Jack discovered that Ana had a strong sexual appetite; but she never stayed over for the night. Her excuse was usually that she didn't want to upset her father or leave him alone in their big mansion. And though Jack perfectly knew that it was just a way for her to not get attached, he still let it slide.

He had to admit that he was surprised that Raymond still didn't turn up on his doorstep, demanding of him to back off from his daughter. Over the years, he had seen Ana mysteriously lose her boyfriends, though Raymond never directly intervened in front of Ana. Still, neither Ana or Jack were naive enough to believe that Raymond did not have a direct link to the constant disappearance of Ana's lovers. He was a scary man, and Jack had to admit that there had been a couple of nights he woke up in cold sweat, sure to have seen a shadow ready to attack him and kill him in his bed.

As he was thinking of all and nothing, Ana appeared in front of him, fresh out of the quick shower she just had and showed him her back as she asked, "Can you zip me up, please?"

"Or you could spend the night?" Jack suggested, sitting straight in the bed, and kissing her naked skin where he knew she would like it the most. She leant a little against him, closing her eyes and appreciating the feel on his lips on her skin, and so he pleaded his case, once again,

"Your father is not stupid Ana. He saw us both leaving the gala together, he knows full well why we did so. Stay tonight, and sleep with me for once. plus, wasn't he supposed to leave with Christian to Vegas after the gala, anyway?"

"Jack …" She started, looking for her words as her hand absentmindedly reached for her pendant.

But when her fingers never found the little silver heart, she lost all colours on her face, whipping it towards the nightstand in the hope to find it. "Where is my necklace?!" She hysterically asked with panic as she got up and rushed to the bathroom.

Jack said nothing, nor did he try to even look for the bloody thing. He had no doubts that the necklace had been a gift from her ex. He had seen Ana play with the pendant countless times when she was sad or nostalgic, or whenever he would try to initiate something a tad romantic toward her.

She came back into the room, dropping on her knees to check next to the nightstand and heaved of pure relief when she found her necklace, before sitting on the bed and starting to put it on her neck. But before she could clasp the two ends together, Jack stopped her and asked,

"Was that a gift from your ex?"

"It just has … some value to me, whomever it comes from," Ana said, freeing her hands so she could clasp the necklace properly on her neck.

Jack frowned, hating himself for what he was about to ask, but knowing that this was something that needed to be done before they could try to go any further, "Is this why you were never invested in Paul, and why you do your best to put some barriers between us? Do you still love your ex?"

And though he had hoped with all his heart that she would answer, Ana remained silent and looked down on her knees. Despite the fact that it had been over a year and more, there was a conscious part of her that still loved this other man.

For a moment, Jack contemplated the dilemma, knowing what his brain was telling him to do contradicted what his heart was telling him to do. It was hard loving someone who loved someone else, especially when that person was fully aware of those feelings. But … it felt to Jack that it would be harder to be parted from Ana.

So he cupped her face with delicacy, and let her know, "_I_ love you, so whatever he did to break your heart, let me try to fix it."

He saw in her blue eyes how pleasure and sadness collided when he declared his love to her, but he didn't care, because, in the end, she kissed him and spent the night with him.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jack's PoV**

Six months after that incident with the necklace, Ana kept wearing it every day, but she had started spending the night with Jack more and more, and opening up to him about herself. Sure the shadow of the ex still existed, and a part of Jack feared that Ana would never fully stop loving this other man, but he could tell that she had feelings for him as well. They shared a lot together, and Ana even started popping out unannounced to surprise him. Which he always replied to with romantic gestures like having flowers delivered to her, or flying her to Seattle so she could see her friends.

In fact, he felt ready for the next step of their relationship, even though he knew that to Ana that step was linked to another. He was ready to have her live with him and spend all his days and nights with her, but knowing Ana's relationship to her father, the one thing that would make her leave the mansion was marriage. And despite knowing that a part of her still loved another man, Jack knew that he loved her enough to bear that cross.

So he bought the ring in her favourite jewellery shop, and was now in a restaurant, sweating and having difficulties to eat as Ana was mindlessly talking about her best friend's problems whilst they were waiting for dessert. Finally, the chocolate soufflés came, but Jack never ate his, paying attention to each spoon Ana had.

Finally, her spoon hit the ring, and she looked with curiosity at her ramequin. When the meaning of this disruption in her dessert started coming to her, Jack took a knee, and asked, his throat swollen with anxiousness,

"Anastasia Rose Steele, would you make me the happiest man on earth, and marry me?"

He had expected many things, but not to see her lose all colours of her face, and close her face, keeping for herself the hint of sadness he saw. His heart started drumming, thinking that maybe he should have kept this whole affair private in case she would turn him down.

He looked at Ana as she stared at the ring, lost in her own world, before she said with a small voice, "I am not turning you down, but can you give me some time? I'll give you an answer by the end of the month."

Jack couldn't help but smile, getting up on his feet and kissing the brunette he loved so much. They finished their dessert, Jack holding a gleeful grin for the rest of the evening that never stopped. Even after they parted ways, and he went back home alone, he kept on smiling like the happy man he was. His joy was only cut short when he realised that there was someone in his living room.

His blood left his face, his first thoughts going to Raymond, finally ready to strike down. Though Raymond never said a single word to Jack that showed that he approved or disapproved the affair he had with his daughter. Still, Jack was not stupid and knew that Raymond was not fond of this new sort of relationship Ana formed with him.

But then, he realised that it was only Christian.

Though he knew that in the streets Christian was getting more and more feared than Raymond, just like in business, Jack never really felt this way. Sure Christian was a hard man, but he was the one who helped him get where he was, which was probably why he felt less frightening than Raymond. still, he wonders how the young man felt about having to play delivering birds for his boss.

"So of all nights, Raymond chose _tonight_ to try to scare me off …" He said with a disabused smile. Knowing the extent of Raymond's power, he was sure that the mobster knew about the ring for his daughter as soon as it left the shop.

"Who said I'm here on Raymond's behalf?"

"Aren't you here to talk about Ana?" Christian nodded, his eyes never leaving Jack, and so Jack shrugged, pouring himself a glass of scotch before he sat under Christian's scrutinising stare, "Then you are here on Raymond's behalf. however he turned it so it wouldn't be so, we both know that Raymond is part of your decision making."

Christian smirked, making Jack feel that he had never been more wrong in his whole life. Still, he said, "It's not going to work. I am not some schoolboy, and I am not Paul. I am going to marry this girl, whether Raymond likes it or not."

At this precise moment happened something that made Jack fear for his life more than he ever did. Christian, who had always been in control of himself, who never showed a single emotion, who was always so well composed, jumped on his feet, his fists shaking by his sides and a death stare aiming at Jack.

"I didn't quite get that last part," He said with a threatening voice. Jack hardly swallowed and did his best to hold Christian's stare as the man stalked to him like a lion to its prey. For the first time in his life, he understood why people feared Christian so much.

But it actually seemed off to see him like that. Christian had used him to other demeanours, which was probably why he bravely and foolishly said, "You know, you don't sound like your usual self. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're a jealous ex."

This was something stupid that adrenaline made him say, and he had expected Christian to get angry for even suggesting something that improbable, but the man laughed.

"If I am a jealous ex, you should then follow my advice, stop whatever it is between you two. It's rather ugly when I'm angry, but it is pure hell when I'm jealous. So if I were you, I would end it by tomorrow night. Let's call it my birthday present."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Jack's PoV**

Jack did not sleep of the night that night, his conversation with Christian playing in replay in his mind. The more he thought about it, the more Christian being Ana's ex made sense and broke his heart. He could have dealt with someone distant that he would never have to see, or maybe just once or twice. But he couldn't deal with someone who would always be by Ana's side, whether she wanted it or not. He couldn't have the man he knew Ana still loved constantly around him, around her, reminding him that he was only number two.

Plus there was the terrible possibility that Christian would get rid of him when he would try to get further with Ana. He would never be able to marry the girl when both her father and her ex were mobsters. still, he wondered what it was that Christian had done for them to breakup, since it was obvious that both still loved each others.

When Ana joined him for coffee that morning, Jack was still unsure of what to do. still, he saw that she was breathtakingly beautiful that day. She was wearing a beautiful blue dress that complimented her skin, her hair wild falling on her shoulders and her charm bracelet on her wrist.

As they started having breakfast, Jack paid attention to the charms, realising that Christian was indeed the jealous ex. Each charm referred to a travel where Ana had gone with Christian. France, Japan, Kenya, even a plane. And didn't Christian mention that it was his birthday on his day? Why would she wear that bracelet on that precise day, if it wasn't because of that special occasion?

"About what I asked you yesterday, I have another question," He abruptly said, cutting her from her talking about her charities. She looked at him, giving him all her attention and he asked, "Do you still see your ex?"

"What do you mean?" She asked, her face closing down as every time the mystery man was mentioned.

"I know that you still love him, and I can deal with that. But is he someone you regularly see out of your week? Is he someone I will have to worry about constantly?"

When she didn't answer, Jack's heart felt like it was crushed in a million pieces, but at least he had his answer. He gave her a sad smile and told her, "I don't think we are going to work, Ana. Not when only one of us is a hundred percent in this relationship. I would have done anything for us to work, but I can't if you only give me one percent of your heart and the rest to another guy that you see daily. Forget I ever proposed."

And on those words, he got up and kissed her forehead before leaving her, his own heart broken.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So what do you think of Jack?**

**💚 What did you think of Ana in this chapter?**

**💚 What do you think of Christian's intervention? Was it him, or Raymond sending him?****?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	65. Chapter 63: Broken Hearts

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 63****: Broken Hearts (3,1K)**

💚** So concerning the last two chapters, I know they seem random and out of nowhere, but they were necessary to have an inkling of what Ana thought/felt without doing her pov. **

💚 **ALSO, Two more updates and we're done ... hehe. Next chapter is going to be massive!**

**💚 And about the pregnancy you guys keep mentioning. Mia never confirmed it. We just know that a sign appeared in the end, but we don't know if it was negative of positive ...**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian was nervous, his last request ringing back through the small static from the connection. Raymond Steele could be a very angry man, although comparing that to his calming tone made him seem professional and not at all terrifying. Almost letting Christian forget that his boss was a crime lord, not just a crime lord, _the_ crime lord. Head of Idris, an exclusive elite of very capable men who led the mafia around the world.

"I suppose it's a small request. I will be at the hotel by seven and we can continue this conversation." Christian was actually surprised to hear that Raymond would be there that early in the morning since he was at the moment several hours drive away from where Christian was.

Heaving a sigh of relief as the phone line went dead, Christian leaned further into the bathroom sink. He had locked himself in there to make his phone call, and even though it was finished he couldn't bring himself to come out. Turning the tap, Christian submerged his hand, and hissed as the icy water touched his face. He had tried to complete his mission, but it was becoming more difficult than he had bargained for. The copper-haired man hoped Raymond could replace him before he did something stupid.

Christian wasn't a bad man, he didn't enjoy torturing children or robbed banks during his lunch break. Ten years ago, on his eighteenth birthday, Raymond Steele had saved him from a life of petty crime, offering him a position in his underground. Christian thought back to how eager he had been, practically vibrating with the excitement to be a part of something bigger, to _belong_.

And over the years, Raymond had shown Christian that he was trusted and accepted, both something Christian wasn't used to feeling. Raymond's faith in Christian was absolute. The proof sat in the next room. Raymond's most precious possession, his only daughter, the apple of his eyes.

_Anastasia Rose Steele _

It had been since he had done the unthinkable and had intervened in Ana's life in a way that would turn her face as red as a beet if she knew. In all honesty, since the breakup, Christian had always done his best to stay as far away from her as possible, taking any mission outside of town that came up, even when it wasn't really necessary for him to actually do them.

But once again, Raymond asked of Christian to get rid of Ana's suitor, and though he didn't like sneaking behind the brunette's back, he still did it with pleasure. He had never seen Paul as a proper opponent, as someone who could steal away Ana's heart, do what he couldn't do. But Jack was another story. Jack _really_ fell in love with her. Jack already had a history with the girl. Jack was going to propose. Every time Christian thought of that, his blood ran cold.

And yet, this was bound to happen. She was bound to get married some day to some other man that wasn't him. She was bound to bear the children of some other man that wasn't him. She was bound to be happy in the arms of some other man that wasn't him.

Despite the fact that it had been two years since the separation, the heartbreak was still strong. No matter how much he pretended that he didn't care, it still hurt in the most mundane moments. Like when Jose announced that he was going to propose to his lover, or when Ryan asked him to be the Godfather of little Brian a few months ago.

Mia had stopped trying to get him to talk to Ana. He knew there was no point, he already tried and she turned her back on him, ignoring everything they had together and dismissing him like an old sock.

And now, he was feeling pathetic, hiding in the bathroom and asking for replacement, sure that he would never be able to go through with the mission he had in hands.

Two days ago, death threats were sent to Raymond, which so far seemed like any other regular day. But those threats weren't targeting Raymond, but his precious daughter. Christian had wanted to stay in New York and investigate who dared threaten the life of the woman he loved, but Raymond sent him away with his daughter, deeming that it would be more prudent to keep her away from danger whilst under the protection of his best man.

They had barely arrived at the hotel in a small town a couple of States away that Christian had been hit by the many memories they all had together in different hotels throughout the world. And that's when he knew that he wouldn't be able to stay alone with Ana without doing something that he might regret later. He really had thought he could have done it, but being alone with her only affirmed what he had known since the beginning of their relationship, he was weak when it came to her. He wouldn't be able to put aside his feelings for her, and knowing that someone might come for her at anytime, it would be best for Lauren to look after the brunette, which was why he called his boss.

With a heave, Christian left the bathroom, his usual poker face on, and he frowned when he saw Ana, his breath catching in his throat. She was only wearing a black bikini, her dark auburn hair falling wildly on her shoulders, and a towel in her hands. With hunger, Christian drank in the body that he missed so much, noticing with dislike that she lost a little weight, but still wishing he could endlessly caress once again her fair skin.

But he shook his head, regaining control of himself, and he sternly asked: "What are you doing?"

"I'm bored to death, and there's a pool in this hotel. Do the math," She replied with a very snappy tone. The same tone she used with him ever since they arrived in this hotel. A tone saying that she despised the idea of being stuck with him, and worst, that she hated him.

"You're not going."

"It's a indoor pool. You checked all the guests staying here. What can _possibly_ happen to me?" Ana retorted all the while rolling her eyes and walking to the door, but Christian repeated himself, more firmly this time:

"You're not going."

He knew that she was right, and that she was risking nothing by going to the pool. Any other man's of Raymond would have granted her her wish, and just followed her there as a precaution; but Christian was using his prerogative as her bodyguard to keep her in her room. Because he knew that the pool was busy at this time, and that he didn't want another man seeing her the way he was seeing her at this very moment.

"Watch me," She challenged, almost snarling the words, and Christian couldn't stop himself from asking:

"Why do you keep on treating me like that?"

"Like what?" She asked, raising her eyebrows at him while showing surprise at his outburst. After all, for the past two years, he had used her to professional interactions, that sometimes were to the limit to cold

"Like you want to punish me? You're the one who ended our relationship, not me," He accused her, not sure of what took over him, but still deciding finally confront her with what she did to their relationship, shattering it to the floor when it had been supposed to bloom.

Ana looked deeply in his eyes, clearly surprised by the turn the conversation took, and she let him know: "It's not my fault if I don't want to be married to an idiot."

"I'm the idiot? Then, what do you call Jack?" Christian snapped, because he still couldn't believe that Ana would settle for someone like him. Sure Jack was a nice guy, but … _he_ was better, and they all knew it.

"Know that for your information, Jack asked me to marry him before you and Dad scared him off," Ana said, digging her knife deep into Christian's heart. He had known that Jack wanted to marry Ana, he had told him that much, but he didn't know that he had already done it.

"_He did what_?!" Christian uttered, still not believing his ears. But what Ana said afterwards, was even worst:

"And I was going to say yes!"

"So you'd marry the worthless piece of shit he was, but not me?!" Christian asked with disbelief. How could he be so in love with someone who couldn't care less about shredding his heart into tiny pieces.

"_Yes_! He actually had the guts to ask _me_ in marriage! Not talk about asking my father so he could marry me! He asked _me_ because he _loved_ me! Not because he was afraid of the consequences of my father knowing about us. _I _was what mattered to him!" Ana yelled, her breath short and her blue eyes filling with tears as Christian was paling at each of her words. _Did she end things because he tried to treat her right and be a gentleman_?

"So you dumped me because I tried to do the right thing?" He inquired, afraid of her answer. Did he lose the love of his life over a misunderstanding? Ana seemed to regain reign over her emotions because she straightened up, and planted her sapphires in his golden eyes as she said:

"No. I dumped you because my father's opinion is more valuable to you than mine. Did you ever asked me if I wanted to marry you? Did you ever asked me if I even loved you? Did you ever told me that _you_ loved me?"

It was as if he was suddenly deaf, only able to hear a striding noise in his ear. He lost her because he had been clumsy and nervous about his proposal. He lost her because he tried to make it all right all in once. He lost her because he didn't propose to her the right way. He actually had pictured himself proposing to her in a hundred different situations. He pictured a romantic getaway, a passionate outburst after their lovemaking, a cosy diner, a spontaneous drop on the knee in front of everyone, a sweet whisper in her ear as they would watch a rom-com. But he just opted for the subtle way of asking without asking by talking about her father. And it had obviously been the wrong way.

"It doesn't matter anymore. It's my fault for believing something as ludicrous as you and I could actually work," Ana said when Christian didn't reply anything after five minutes of silence. He blinked, looking at this girl that he never stopped loving; but just like during their breakup, she refused to look at him, and tried to flee him once again:

"Let me pass through Christian. I want to take my head off of things."

"Ana …" He started, taking her arm in his hand and feeling shivers run through him when he touched her bare skin. But she shook her head, trying to get out of his grip as she demanded:

"Let me go."

"I do love you," Christian said, cupping her face so she would have no other choice but to look at him as he continued: "And I have for quite some time. I shouldn't have assumed that you knew."

He was screaming sincerity, but Ana closed her eyes, stubbornly shaking her head as she said: "I don't want to hear it, Christian. I don't want to go back through the pain again."

"And I don't want to keep on living the way we lived for the past two years, afraid that you'll finally move on and start a life with some other guy that ain't me. I don't want to keep having you so close and yet so far. I don't want the pain that our breakup caused me to keep on existing and dig a whole inside my heart," Christian replied, pouring his heart out to her as he leaned his forehead against hers and bringing his second hand to her face.

She still had her eyes closed, though Christian could see that tears were threatening to escape, and he begged for his case one more time: "Please Ana, give me a second chance. Give me back my Ana. Come back to my life as mine. Come back and give me back my heart. Let me prove you how much you mean to me."

"What about my Dad?" Ana asked, finally opening her eyes; and it took all of Christian's self control not to take her lips in his when she did so. How much he loved her eyes, and how much he had missed them.

"I'll deal with whatever comes. Just give me a reason to," Christian promised, and when he saw doubt in her eyes, he told her: "Don't overthink it, babe. Just come back to me. I love you. I love you more than anything, and I want you to be in my life for the rest of it."

Christian watched Ana's eyes finally light up the way they would when they would be alone. With that feeling, he longed so long to see gleam in her again. And finally, finally she said those three little words: "I love you too, Christian."

It's all it took for Christian to put a somewhat distance between them and kneel before her, reaching for the ring that never left his side ever since he bought it. He looked deep into her eyes, slowly opening the box as he asked with a shaky voice: "Will you marry me, Anastasia Rose Steele?"

For a moment, Ana didn't say anything, her eyes glued on the ring. Christian saw her sapphires sparkle with happiness before she kneeled to be at his level, and shyly nodded her consent swiftly following this gesture with a passionate kiss. Christian eagerly responded to her kiss, though he still made sure to slip the ring on her fingers as he made her sit on his laps.

Once they broke their kiss, Christian pecked his way from her lips to her neck, lingering a little more on the spots he knew sensitive; and Ana asked: "For how long have you had this ring?"

"Since Italy where I had it made for you. But now that I've put it on your finger, I intend on never seeing it off."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

The next morning, Christian woke up before Ana. He looked at her sleeping form in his arms, and smiled of happiness when he saw her hand resting on his naked chest. That hand that was holding the proof of his love for her. He glanced down at his fiancé, loving the way that combination of words sounded in his minded, and eager to taste it in his mouth; and when it became obvious that she was still lost deep into sleep, Christian decided to get up.

He dressed up, and suddenly realised the time, making him rush out of the room. Raymond had told him to meet in the restaurant of the hotel at seven o'clock, and Christian was already half an hour late. But he still did as if nothing when he reached the lobby, and he nodded to Lauren who said that she would go upstairs and replace his watch for the duration of his meeting with Raymond. Christian walked to his boss who was waiting for him at a remote table, his breakfast in front of him.

Raymond was a scary man, just by looking at him. He had this aura of power around him that would intimidate even the bravest men. And to that, he also had a broad body that proved that he could end a life with his bare hands. And still, Christian never saw this side of his boss. He was more impressed by his oral skills, than by his physique.

With a little clear of his throat, Christian made his presence known by his boss, and the fair blond man looked up from his newspaper before indicating to Christian to sit in front of him. Then, he took his cup of tea and sipped on it, his dark brown eyes steady on Christian as he asked: "So? What did you want to talk about?"

"Your daughter," Christian truthfully said, because even yesterday, Ana was what he wanted to talk about. And even though the situation between them changed, Christian knew that it would be best for her security to change her bodyguard.

Raymond raised an eyebrow at Christian, surprised by this topic Christian broached, since Christian never talked about Ana to her father. "What about her?" He asked, putting his tea cup back on the table and crossing his legs as he got more comfortable in his armchair.

"I don't think I am your best man to keep watch on her," Christian asserted, finding it extremely difficult to breath suddenly.

Raymond stayed silent, downing the information of his best man flanking him. For two long minutes, Christian felt like Raymond was dissecting his very soul with his eyes, and like his boss could see all his deepest secrets through his eyes. But then, Raymond simply took back his newspapers in his hands, and resumed on reading whatever he was reading before Christian arrived as he lightly uttered, as if nothing:

"Why? Because you have feelings for her?"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**💚Haaaaaaaaaaaaa that ending ... hehe **

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So what do you think of the reunion?**

**💚 What did you think of Ana's reason? And yes it is childish, but remember that again and again, she has said that it was her biggest fear to have Christian choose her father over her.**

**💚 What do you think of Raymond? How long has he known?****?****?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	66. Final: The Hardship Of Being A Father

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Final Chapter****: The Hardship Of Being A Father (5,0K)**

💚** So this is the last chapter. Then we will have a nice short epilogue that you might or might not enjoy … (ominous music, hehe)**

💚 **ALSO, the epilogue is coming out tomorrow. So review and be on the lookout.**

💚** Also, also, I will make a seperate with an author note to address the reviews, because I haven't taken the time to answer lately. **

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV **

Raymond carefully watched Christian's face, trying to catch him for once out of his usual poker face. But as usual, Christian remained near impossible to read. In fact, if it hadn't been for the fact that Raymond had been used to spot those minute little things about Christian when it came to Ana, he wouldn't even have been able to tell if he was right or not.

"What do you mean?" Christian asked as if nothing as he held the older man's gaze.

"Do you really think that I wouldn't notice my second in command fooling around my own daughter? I know her every move, down to her tiniest sneezes, and you thought you could get away with starting a relationship with her without me knowing? I am neither senile or stupid, Christian. Did you really think I wouldn't notice the change between you two?"

And finally, Christian let an emotion show on his face, though it wasn't the one Raymond had expected. He had been ready for a very heated argument between the two of them during which both Christian and he would put the blame on the other as to why this had remained a secret for so long. But all he could see on Christian's face was confusion.

"It's not what you think," The young man said, almost grinding his teeth, and Raymond repressed a chuckle.

"Isn't it, though?" He nonchalantly asked, getting more comfortable in his chair, and repositioning his newspaper in the reading position. "I think it is _exactly_ what I think it is. I think something happened whilst the two of you were in Japan, and you two decided to start sneaking out on me, with the sweet delusion that I was some old idiot who wouldn't notice …"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

It was the morning after Ana came back from Japan, and though Raymond was happy to have his daughter back after a three weeks separation, he had no idea what to tell her. He knew she went there in the hopes to have a glimpse of Carla's past, and thanks to Christian, she did. The picture the young man had given him was something Raymond would treasure for the rest of his life, the improbable picture of mother and daughter.

He had to admit that he was surprised that all during the duration of their breakfast, Ana did not mention even once going to her late mother's former school. But he knew that he had always made it difficult for her to talk with him about that person they were both missing so much. Elena and Eric (when he was still alive) had told many times to break that wall between them, but this was the one thing he wasn't brave enough to do.

Though Ana was sweet and innocent, Raymond knew his daughter. And she was smarter than she was letting on. He had noticed the way she always avoided asking particular questions that could lead to him telling her outright what he was doing of his days and nights. In fact, Ana always made a point to never bring politics with him or to never read a newspaper in his presence, even if it was a simple gossip magazine. She liked the pretence of an image she had of him, and she was doing her best to preserve it.

As they kept on eating, Raymond realised with worry, that though Ana did not ask about her mother, she was also very calm about her latest travel. Usually, she would talk nonstop about all the experiences she did, and how much she liked it, and there, she was simply eating, not saying a word.

He carefully looked at his daughter, trying to see what was different, and why she wasn't her blabbering self, hoping that she didn't catch some kind of bug abroad. "Are you alright, sweetheart?"

Ana brightly smiled, doing her best to reassure her father, but what she didn't know was that she had always been a poor liar. He hesitated on pushing the issue but decided against it. If there something important had happened in Japan, Christian would have mentioned it first thing.

A few months passed after Ana's Japanese excursion, and out of the blue, right after he and Elena went to Vegas to sort out some business, Ana started spending more and more time at Kate's. At first, he didn't really think much of it, he knew his Goddaughter has been proposed to, and it was only natural of Ana to want to plan everything with her best friend for the wedding. But one night, it didn't make sense. Elliott was in town, and Raymond knew Ana didn't like to intrude in their time together. The truth was obvious, Ana had a secret boyfriend.

For weeks and weeks, he tries to find out who could be that secret suitor that Ana was trying to hide from him, but Ana was getting good at eluding questions, especially when those questions were never direct questions. More than once, he was tempted to ask someone to follow her, to see who was that secret boy and hoping it wasn't that scum of a politician that was Paul and who seemed to have a likeness for his daughter. But the thing was, Ana always went to Kate's building, Jose was clear on that. So the mysterious boy had to live in that building as well.

It was only when Ana mentioned Paris, that Raymond put two and two together. When she asked for the trip, they were in a delicate business transaction where he wanted Christian to be. After all, if the man was supposed to take care of those finances for his daughter when he would die, he should learn how do it properly. So, when his daughter said she wanted to go to France, he let her know that a few people would go with her.

As much as he trusted Christian to look after his daughter and have her best interests at heart, it wasn't the same with anyone else. Jose was the exception, but Jose couldn't fly. But then, Ana asked in a well manoeuvred request that Christian only came with her, saying that if she had to be followed, let it be by just one person. She didn't even fuss when Raymond mentioned that she would have to wait a week or so before going, then.

This was when it clicked for Raymond. Ana always fussed, and Ana didn't like Christian because she wasn't able to bat her lashes at him and get what she wanted of him. He knew full well that she bribed more than one person following her to give her some space, and so he had expected for her to jump on the occasion, perfectly aware of why she had chosen this country next.

So it didn't make sense for her to ask for Christian. Except if _he_ was the secret boyfriend. And it all started making sense. It explained why Ana would go "at Kate's", and why Christian declined a few dinner invites when Ana was out with her "friend". It went even further than that, it explained why Christian knew about Carla. Ana rarely spoke about her mother to anyone, not even Elena. So why did she confide in Christian, if it wasn't because they already had a connection.

As realisation dawned on him, anger started stirring in him. He couldn't believe he had been played like a fool, especially by the two people he was supposed to trust the most in this world. But no matter his anger, his reason reminded him that it was only speculations, he didn't know for sure. And he couldn't ask the young man outright, Christian was a much better liar than Ana.

So he let them go to Paris together, a part of him hoping that he was wrong, and when she came back, once again, Ana remained silent about her trip. She did not even mention trying to find her brother, thing that Raymond was sure she would do there. When he saw Christian the next day at the gala, he gave him an outing, an easy way to come out and confess, but though Christian did not lie, he eluded the question.

Raymond stayed in the secluded room, staring at the fire as he was trying to figure out his next move. All his instincts were telling him to get rid of Christian in a permanent manner. He did more than go after his daughter, he did it behind his back, and Christian, of all people, should know better than to do that. But still … Raymond had developed a fondness in the guy, and had grown wiser over the years. He didn't want to repeat another Michael fiasco, for his sake, or Ana's.

He was lost in his thoughts, his glass of scotch empty still rolling in his hand, when someone entered the room. He didn't have to turn his head to know that it was Elena, he just knew by the way she walked. For a moment, she did not say a word, probably assessing his somber mood, and after a few minutes, she sat on the arm of the chair and rested a comforting hand on his shoulder, taking away his empty glass.

"I should have gone with tradition and trained Ana to replace me. Girls are less disappointment than boys," He announced, knowing that he wouldn't be in this mess if he had trained Ana the way he had trained both Michael and Christian.

"Oh? The golden boy has managed to disappoint you?" Elena asked with a mocking tone. Though she never said it outright, Raymond knew that Elena did not particularly like Christian. He didn't hold it against her. No one seemed to like the man. He was too cold for his own good. And yet, Ana seemed to like him …

"He's shagging around with _my daughter_!"

"Are you sure? I mean, it's _Christian_ we're talking about," Elena said with surprise. After all, Christian's allegiance to Raymond was well known … or at least his former allegiance and loyalty.

"Pretty sure. Ana gives all the signs."

"Well, Ana has always had a crush on him. Are you sure you're not reading wrong?"

"_Excuse me_?" Raymond asked, finally tearing his gaze away from the fire to stare at his song time friend with astonishment. How come he had never known that?

"Oh, Ray … This is something only mothers notice. She and Kate had their little awkward phase, giggling and blushing every time they would see him. It's just a silly thing girls go through."

Raymond downed the information, surprised that he never noticed this about his own daughter, but still shook his head, "In any case, this is more than a crush. I can bet on it."

"Maybe, but what are you going to do about it? Take him away from your daughter? Remove him from _your_ life?"

Though Elena had kept her tone light, there was some condonation in her voice. Raymond knew that she never approved of him interfering with Ana past boyfriends. And they both knew that his likeness for Christian went further than simple mentor-student relationship. But still …

"He _mollested_ my daughter! Behind my back!"

"You're going a bit too far, here. We both know that Ana would never let anything happen without her consent. I think you've had too much to drink," Elena reasoned, and just when Raymond was about to retort, the door opened once again and Ana herself walked in, brightly smiling at her father,

"There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you. I'm off with Ethan and Kate. We're going to the rink, and there is no way I'm iceskating in that dress."

She kissed her father's cheek and waved at Elena, before dashing off with happiness. Raymond's eyes remained on the door once she closed it, so many mixed emotions about it. Her hair was different than in the morning, and her dress seemed a bit too rumpled for a simple gala. There was no need to be a genius to know what Ana had been up to earlier in the day.

But more importantly, she was harbouring a new piece of jewellery that he knew for a fact she never had before. In fact, she didn't even have it in the morning, which meant she must have had it during the gala. The necklace was of silver, with a silver lace-like heart … Almost the same as her mother's … Raymond didn't even know Ana remembered this small detail about Carla. It was a pendant that Michael had gotten his wife, and that she wore constantly. But it had been lost in the fire, and both Elena and Eric had let Raymond know that Ana was loosing memories of her mother over the years, so he never expected her to remember that one little thing.

"That looked …"

"I know," Raymond said, his eyes still glued on the door.

"If it is from Christian, it's more than a shag, Ray. Hookups don't offer each other that kind of gifts, no matter how wealthy they are."

"I know," He repeated, less sure than ever of what to do. He couldn't deny that his daughter was happy at this very moment, and she must have liked her gift very much if she wore it barely moments after Christian gave it to her. He probably did when they disappeared together, and she probably thanked him in a more than friendly way.

"Ray …" Elena started. "Just let them come out on their own. Ana probably wants a relationship I which you are not a third wheel and Christian … I don't know about him. But give your daughter this one thing."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

In the months that followed Christmas, Raymond did his best to stay away from his daughter's love-life, though he did try several times to get Christian himself to admit to it. No matter what Elena said, Ana had never been afraid of a confrontation with her father, so he was persuaded that Christian was the one who wanted to keep their relationship a secret. It was only Christian came back from a really long month away, that Raymond realised that Ana must be the one keeping their relationship a secret.

Nothing really changed in his own relationship with the young man, but something he saw in Ana's study that proved that Christian had taken the risk to come in their mansion whilst he himself was there, just to see the brunette. A golden rose standing proudly on its own on her desk. Raymond knew that Christian was a careful man, and no matter how much he liked Ana, he wouldn't have risked it if he was the one hiding their relationship. In fact, after that day, Raymond realised that there were many things that Christian would have done differently if he was the one holding the ban on the secrecy.

And though Ana still refused to tell him anything about a possible boyfriend, Raymond could see the changes that her relationship with Christian bring to her. She got better at concealing her feelings, and became much better at eluding, sometimes to the limit of lying. And on an emotional level, he had been relieved that Christian was the one Ana went to for comfort when her grandfather died. He never had been able to bear his daughter's tears, and now he even had a bit of hope for Carla's tragic anniversary. Ana wouldn't be alone this year.

Still, Raymond had to admit that this relationship between his daughter and his best man scared him at some point when Christian asked about Michael. In all honesty, he had been dreading the question since Paris, and though he had no proof of that, he was sure that Christian did a little bit of digging around. And though he could have lied to the man and invent a whole different story as to how the teenager died, he didn't.

First, because Christian was too good of a liar to be lied to. If he did, Christian would have known and made his mission to find the truth. Second, because it was taking off his shoulders a weight to share this with someone. Sure Elena knew, but Elena, though being a parent, wasn't in the business. He knew that though she didn't blame Raymond and his short temper, she neither approved or understood what happened between him and Michael.

Once the truth was out, all Raymond could think about was how Christian might use this information to tear him and Ana apart. There would be no need of secrecy if Ana resented her father. He could in fact have the girl all to himself, and not just a few nights a week. And Raymond wasn't sure how he would go forward without the love of his daughter.

But Christian being Christian, managed to find a way around the information he had been given, playing dangerously with words. This was when he knew Ana loved him. She took his words for it, whatever he might have told her, and never tried to look further. And though he never commented on it, he noticed the little urn that she placed in the library, right above the chair her brother used to sit on.

Still, Raymond's relief did not last long. Barely a few weeks after Christian broke the news to Ana of Michael's death, he had a similar job to do, that he knew he wouldn't be able to do properly. Mostly because he was still in shock himself. Christian had been killed in Macau, and all he had to console himself or his daughter was the brutal footage of him getting a bullet in the chest.

But Ana barely blinked. Though he had showed to Jose the video, his eyes had been glued on his daughter and how she reached for her necklace that never left her neck when the bullet hit Christian. But she didn't cry, she didn't wail, she simply concealed her feelings and left the room.

In the following weeks, he went himself to Macau, hoping to retrieve Christian's body and give him a proper funeral, as well as give his daughter closure. Ana never tried to contact him even once, which was something that never happened when one of them was abroad. And Raymond had no idea how this birthday was going to go for her. She was so looking forward for her twenty-first birthday, and he was sure that she was looking forward to spend time with Christian.

When he came back, a couple of days before her birthday, he was decided to give her Christian's place. A way to let her know that he wouldn't have minded, and a way to keep a connection between the two. Moreover, he knew that Christian had a cat (though he had no doubts the feline was from Ana), so it would be as if a part of Christian stayed with Ana.

Of course, all those plans flew out the window after Gail's piercing scream and her discovery of Christian's ghost. It was that very morning that Raymond knew that Christian loved Ana as well. Though Christian looked fresh, and had obviously made a detour by his place to wash and shave, Ana sold him away. it was something subtle that only someone knowing his daughter extremely well could catch on, but it was there. The lack of surprise or relief. That added to the charm bracelet on her wrist though she was still in pyjamas. That meant that Christian came to see Ana first. After coming back from the dead, his first thoughts had been on Ana.

Though he had to settle on a more traditional present now, Raymond didn't complain. He was more than glad to have Christian back. Especially after he snooped around in his apartment, in search of his will, and realised that Christian had updated it in Ana's favour, though he had left some of his stock options to the woman who saved him from starvation, Mrs Parvarti. Ana would inherit most of Christian's possessions and investments in case of his death, without any veto or special request.

So from then on, all Raymond was waiting for was for one of them to finally let him on in the secret. There was a night when he thought that might finally happen, when he came back from a trip, and Christian was waiting for him in his room. But the conversation turned out to be really unexpected. Christian's asked about his parents, and Raymond couldn't see why. Christian wasn't someone to dig in the past, he had buried his parents and had no interests of knowing about them in the present.

The week that followed, he noticed how sad Ana was, though she did her best to hide it. And he gathered from that, that whatever happened to make Christian ask about his parents, Ana must have had a role in it, and that Christian didn't appreciate it. To be honest with himself, Raymond was ready to confront Christian about it as soon as he would be back from Moscow, but Elena advised against it, saying that couples were bound to argue, and that it wasn't his place to fix it.

And Raymond's worry concerning his daughter's love life quickly disappeared when Carla's mother died. Weirdly enough, Ana seemed even more affected by her grandmother than her grandfather, and she stayed in her room crying all day long. And in the middle of the night, he heard a noise, but he didn't have to check to know who it was. Despite the thousands of miles that was separating them and their argument, Christian managed to be back to Ana as soon as she needed him, and truth be told, Raymond half expected it. Which was probably why he had been straining his ear, hoping his theory would be true.

But Raymond only knew the true extent of Christian's feelings for Ana when those terrible pictures came to them. To anyone else, it was just Christian doing his job, but Raymond could see that this was Christian overreacting. Christian was someone calm and composed, who always took his time, even when it came to take a life. In that case, he acted out of anger, killing the person who had been supposed to prevent that very situation of being, on the spot. His whole body emanated a cold and frightening demeanour at that very moment.

And more than that, Christian had been vicious in his revenge. He played with Seelie like a cat with his prey and dismissed her like an old sock tarnished. And wouldn't it have been for the whole gun situation with Ana, Raymond would have appreciated the whole thing much more. The issue hadn't really been in the gun, but on how it was brought up. _Ana_ was the one who asked for it. And Raymond knew that it was because Christian suggested the idea to her, she never would have come up with this idea on her own. And though he knew it was foolish, he couldn't help but see it as Christian having more importance to Ana than he did. He couldn't help but feeling that ultimately, he would lose his daughter to Christian.

This fear grew even bigger when he caught wind that Christian had a ring made especially for Ana, whilst they were in Italy. Christian was going to take away Ana, and though a part of him was happy for his daughter, because she was obviously happy with Christian, another part of him was scared of the loneliness that change will bring him.

But nothing ever happened. Ana came back from one her "nights out" with tears in her eyes, and Christian got even colder than he already was. And then came the two idiots Ana used as rebounds, each time forcing Raymond to intervene since Christian was being too stubborn to do it on his own. He couldn't tell if it was the young man's ego, or simply him being too noble to intervene in Ana's life, but if Raymond were to chose, he'd rather have Ana with Christian than with a politician, or with a Jack. Especially since Jack had the audacity to buy a ring for her.

Which was why he lied to Christian and pretended that there was a threat on Ana's life, surprised that Christian never blinked an eye, and simply went on in a mission that would have brought many questions from him if he was in his right state of mind. He forced them together, because though he could tell Christian was in pain, he could also tell that Ana had never moved on either, no matter how much she tried.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

Raymond watched Christian, letting him sink in that he had known from the start. And it was without surprise that Christian kept his face blank, even though he had been caught redhanded. So with a small smirk, folding a bit the newspaper to look at Christian as he asked with a mocking tone,

"Am I forgetting something?"

"I love her," Was all Christian had to say, making Raymond refocus his attention on the news of the day.

"I figured that much."

He saw from the corner of his eye Christian sit a bit more comfortably in his chair, and asked with nonchalance, "So what is your plan now? We both know that threat and torture won't keep me away. Are you going to kill me in the back garden?"

"Kill you? So she can hate me for the rest of her life?" Raymond pondered, his eyes scanning through the latest political scandal. "I might have underestimated your love for her, but you are underestimated how much I am willing to comply to make my daughter happy, Christian. The thing is …"

Raymond stopped himself, his eyes catching a glimpse of his panicking daughter walking straight to them. As soon as she saw him looking at her, she harboured a bright smile, that he returned to her before he quickly added for Christian's sake only,

"I think the simple knowledge of me being her father will be enough for you to make sure that every day she will open her eyes will be a happy day for her. Because you know that I could make you disappear and that she would never know about it. Because _you_, better than anyone, know how much I can sacrifice to keep that smile she has on her face."

Though Christian didn't have time to bounce on that, it was clear in his eyes that he knew that Raymond referred to Michael and how he concealed his death from her for so many years in order to not shatter the image she had of her brother.

"What are you doing here, Dad?" Ana asked, unknowingly cutting short the conversation between the two men and sitting on her father's armchair after kissing his cheek.

Raymond smiled, his eyes landing on the ring ornamenting his daughter's finger before swiftly flying to Christian. He had known that the young man loved his daughter for a while, but he didn't know he was a romantic to have the ring perfectly made for her, and keep it on himself all this time after their breakup.

"Do I need a reason to see if my daughter is alive and well?" He asked, placing a wild lock of hair being her ear.

Ana grinned at her father, oblivious of Raymond's true motives here, but obviously thrilled with his answer. And though Raymond's eyes were on his daughter, the corner of them was still analysing blank expression. Apparently, both men were simply waiting for Ana to acknowledge her last piece of jewellery.

"Since you're here we should definitely go shopping. I saw this cute boutique on our way here, but boring Christian had me confined to my hotel room. Surely you can tell him to loosen up," Ana pleaded, making a pouty face that her father had never been able to resist to.

Raymond smiled to his daughter as she rose from his armchair and sat on the free place next to Christian as Raymond promised: "I'll take you shopping in the afternoon. Let me guess, it was a bookstore …"

Ana smiled with a pang of innocent guilt gleaming in her green eyes; and took a toast out of her father's plate, her smile still plastered on her face. And Raymond couldn't help but wonder if she was simply happy to see him, or if it was the fact that she and Christian just reconciled that made her so smiley.

"You seem cheerful," He pointed out. "Anything you'd like to share?"

"Can't I be just happy?" Ana retorted with challenge, and Raymond replied:

"Of course you can. Does this happiness have anything to do with the new piece of jewellery you're wearing?"

Ana briefly glanced at Christian, but Raymond still saw the hesitation in her eyes, which made Raymond wonder if maybe he had intervened too early in their reunion.

"Do you have a specific question, Dad?" Ana eluded, to which Raymond responded with a question on his own:

"Do you have something to tell me, Ana?"

Christian took Ana's hand in his, probably deciding that it was finally time for him to step into their little family meeting. From the corner of his eye, Raymond saw how Ryan from afar subtly reached for his gun, his brows furrowed of anticipation as his eyes were flying from Raymond to Christian, letting Raymond know that, though Jose had known, he was the only one to know about Ana and Christian.

"I asked Ana to marry me, and she said yes," Christian said, officially letting Raymond know of his plans concerning this girl that they both loved so much. Raymond's eyes swiftly rested on their locked hands before settling on his daughter's face.

"Did she, now?" He said, his eyes never leaving his beloved daughter, and she narrowed her eyes at him, snapping with sarcasm:

"What? You're going to send Christian to scare himself off?"

Raymond chuckled before getting up from his armchair, causing his soldiers to subtly get closer to their boss as he let his daughter know, though his eyes were steady on Christian: "I don't need to scare Christian away. He knows better than to hurt you …"

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚** That was something. I'm so glad this story has come to an end…. The epilogue will be Ana's point-of-view, FINALLY, haha**

**~ Anyway, question time:**

💚**So Raymond knew, all along ...**

**💚 What did you think of Elena? I know she wasn't much in here, but she still was important.**

**💚 What do you think of Raymond now? **

**💚 What do you think will happen next****?**

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	67. Note

**My dear little broccoli 💚💚💚**

**💚 So, I have a few things to say about this story. First of all, I want to thank everyone who ever followed, favourite or reviewed this story. As you know, I never planned to actually make it a FSOG story, but someone asked me to do it from a TMI story that I wrote, and since I have always been rather bad at saying no, this happened. Still, there are some things I'd like to clear out. **

**1\. For those who think the story did not have a plot, I highly suggest you go back to the prologue because the prologue is a flashforward to the end of the story. I never start a story if I don't know where it's going. It might not go the way YOU want, but this is the beauty of this world. We are all different. There are several hints in the story that indicated that the story would go toward that territory, and if you didn't catch them, i'm sorry for you, but that doesn't make me feel bad about my story. **

**2\. For those putting Christain on a pedestal, remember that we see the story from his POV. the way we perceive ourselves is never the same as the way others perceive us. And every single POV that was not Christian emphasised on how cold Christian is. Hence why they were not filler chapters. I am not saying that he is a bad person, but he is not an easy person. Even Ana told him several times that he didn't open up to her much. Remember that he is a mobster, a killer who actually likes his line of work. **

**3\. Now Ana. I have to say that I am shocked that so many are so eager to call her names, because she tried to move on from a bad breakup, and had sex with her new BOYFRIEND of six months. I don't think any of you were calling Christian names in the original story when he said that in the course of six years, he had 15 contractual relationships and many other casual hookups ... This is such a double standard, and double standards have always had this way to irk me up. Christian and Ana were separated for two years. I fail to see how it's bad for someone to have sex with someone they are currently seeing. But that's me. **

**4\. Also, many people complained about the fact that Ana is a spoiled brat, and I don't see where this is news ... From the very first chapter she appeared in, she has always been described as a spoiled brat by every single speaking character. From her father to Christian, Kate, Jose, Mia, even Gail. EVERYONE described Ana as a spoiled brat in some way, shape or form. So I don't see why people are getting upset about it toward the end of the story. Ana is flawed, and so is Christian. I personally don't like a story with perfect characters. AND this story is described as OOC in the summary. If you can't handle OOC, don't read a story that warns you about it, then. **

**4\. About the proposal. I want you to remember how some of you complained that Kate chapter at the beginning of the story was a filler, but it actually was there to show Ana's feelings as to how a proposal was supposed to occur. She said that, though it was cute that Elliott wanted to ask for Kate's hand to her father, it was a real proof of love that he proposed to Kate first. She even said that it proved that Elliott respected Kate and that if it had been the other way around, it would have been very wrong. So, yes, to her, Christian saying he would ask her father before even asking her when he never even told her that he loves her is something wrong. I am not saying that I agree with her, I am just explaining how she thinks and feels.**

**5\. And also, I just want to point out that we don't know if she was pregnant. Mia was there with her when she took the test, and a few months later, she never popped any baby or anything ...**

**6\. Now, about Ray. Several times in the story, characters have said that Ray always knew everything, so of course, he knew. ^^**

**7\. And now, I want to talk to those who assume they know all about my life because they read ONE story of mine. Those who think that I don't believe in the male/female friendship have obviously not read the Daddy story, and obviously don't know me, given the fact that my BFF is a guy, and has been for ten years. In fact, I usually get along better with men than with women. But yeah, I don't think a guy and a girl can be friends without sex, according to you. For those who think that I have no business in the FSOG fandom, once again, I am just doing a favour, pulling time that is precious to me to make those changes because someone asked me to do so. And I was actually asked to do two stories, but I only did this one, because I wanted to test proof the fandom, given the fact that the other story treats a very sensitive topic. I will still do it, But I will definitely monitor the reviews on it. For those who think I take too long to update and that my chapters are too short. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? There are just five chapters throughout the whole story that are below 2000 words, and I updated the whole story in less than six months, whilst being active on other stories. I can't even process how this is too slow when there has been at least one update a week, and how this is too short. But you know what, the funny thing is, the people reading this note are not the one this particular paragraph is aimed at. This paragraph is for those who hide behind the 'guest' status to whine because things don't go their way and because they don't have their fairytale ending.**

**8\. To all the wonderful people who just enjoyed the story for the sake of enjoying a story, not because they wanted to judge the person writing it, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I am so grateful you took the time to read the story, and to review, whether it was just your impressions or constructive criticism. Thank you very much for being constant and unknowingly boosting me up with your reviews, or your PM.**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**💚Now, the news you wanted the most, yes there will be a sequel. It will have various POV, but mostly Ana's, and I am warning you now, the update won't be as regular. Because I have so many stories to work on at the same time. My fault, I know. But in the meantime, you can enjoy, **

**💚Give Me The Daddy & I'll Give You The Sugar 💚 It's a short story where Ana has had a hard life and is, now, struggling between two jobs to pay for her studies. She's through with people, having been left down one too many times. But what happens when a certain man finds interest in her? CHRISTIAN/ANA {OOC/AH/AU} Romance/Drama/Hurt**

**💚Road Trippin' 💚 After five years of being abused, Ana finally finds the courage to run away. She plans to live a new life, away from the nightmares of her past. Little does she know that this whole new life is waiting for her with open arms. {OOC/AH/AU} - CHRISTIAN/ANA - Humour/Drama/Romance/Family/Friendship (_This story will be about abuse, and anyone being mean in the comments about it will be deleted, I don't mind you guys sharing your opinions, but I don't want anyone to use the comment section as a mean to put down those suffering from abuse)_**

**💚Anyway, look for those stories, and the epilogue coming soon. And don't think I am ranting. I am just using the opportunity to answer to all the reviews I have missed over the past fifteen chapters. Hope to get some of your feedback, and in the meantime ...**

**Love, Mina 💚💚💚**


	68. Epilogue

**My dear little broccolis **💚💚💚

💚** So remember that this pic is RATED M, and it is not only for the sexy times. Some dark moments will be approached in this story, and they can trigger some people. This is a fair warning to remind you that this story sets place in a dark world, which means it is bound to mountains dark themes.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**Epilogue**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV **

As she watched her father leave the hotel, Ana couldn't help but feel a ball of anxiety growing in her stomach. Sure she loved Christian, and sure she would love to spend the rest of her life with, but was it enough to forgo who he was? There was a huge difference between dating a mobster and marrying one. But she didn't have the heart to let Christian know about any of her worries. He seemed so happy.

As soon as her father's car was out of sight, Christian took her in his arms and brought her upstairs, making her giggle, though they both knew that nothing would happen. Of all the times they had to reconcile, it had to be during her cycle. Once in the room, he pecked her neck, declaring,

"I love you so much, you have no idea."

She simply smiled, relishing once again in hearing those particular words out of this particular man's mouth. If she was honest with herself, she did regret not opening up sooner to him and being so afraid of confrontation that they lost two years. If she could, there were a lot of things that she would do differently, but she couldn't change the past.

"So what did Dad and you talk about before I got there?" She questioned, a part of her still scared that Christian put her father first. He gently smiled to her, before kissing her forehead,

"We talked about this particular girl we both hold dear to our hearts, and how she's blurring my vision, and how he has known for some time that she was on my mind."

"Dad knew all along?"

"I'm afraid he did." Ana had to admit that though she appreciated her father's discretion, she was a bit disappointed in herself. She had been so sure that she had been discreet and that she had managed to get the best of her father for once.

She looked down, her eyes falling on her ring and asked, "I suppose you want to get married as fast as possible."

Christian shrugged, removing his shirt as he let her know, "As long as I'm the one you're walking to at the altar, I don't mind whatever date you want."

She meekly smiled, before taking her courage by the horn and giving her conditions, "I know you want children, but I want to be married first. And I want my Cinderella wedding, and it can't be on any other significant date. I want a summer wedding as well. And … most of all, I don't want to leave my Dad alone."

Christian frowned at that, letting her know that he wasn't sure he understood what she meant, "I don't mind coming living at your place before the wedding, but once I am your wife, you have to come live with my Dad and I. Though he would never admit it to you, Dad won't recover being left alone in that big mansion."

She had expected Christian to argue, saying that their married life shouldn't start with her father as a third wheel, but he simply smiled and agreed on her terms. then, he kissed her lips and let her know that he would take a quick shower, warning her with a joking tone not to run off whilst he was under the water.

And though she hadn't been giving a single thought into that action, the first thing she did when Christian closed the bathroom door was to call the one person who could give her comfort. Elena picked up at the second ring, and Ana immediately let her know what was on her heart,

"I think I've done something stupid, Aunt Elena." Elena listened, waiting for Ana to explain herself. "Yesterday night, Christian asked me to marry him, and I said yes."

"Congratulations!" The older woman cheered on the other end of the phone, clear joy in her tone. "Why would you say this is stupid? I thought after all that hardship you guys went thought, you'd be happy he proposed."

Ana didn't ask how Elena knew all about Christian and her. If her father had known all along, he must have shared this with his best friend, Ana had no doubts about that.

"Don't get me wrong, I do love Christian. Very much, to be honest. But … is it wise of me to marry someone … in his profession? To start a life and a family with him?"

"Oh, honey. I'm sorry to tell you, but this is something you can't escape. I know you don't like thinking about it, but Christian is who he is because _your father_ is who he is. No matter who you wed, this is something that will haunt you. So it would be best if you married the one that makes you special. Doesn't Christian makes you feel special? I'm not talking about what you want, or need. I'm talking about that little something that only Christian manages to get from you."

Ana knew very well what Elena meant. Though she did consider settling for Jack, forcing herself to make it work, Jack never managed to make her feel the same way Christian did. It was more than special, Christian made her feel unique in every way. And so, she asked for her Godmother,

"Will you help me like you helped Kate?"

"Of course, honey! I already have my scrapbook, waiting for you to see how we're going to theme this wedding."

Ana smiled to herself, before hanging up and letting herself fall backwards, already picturing what her wedding would be like. Sure she had a few sombre thoughts trying to get in the way, one in particular that reminded her of how close Christian's vivid dream had come to become a reality but all in all, all she could think was her dress and Christian dong his best to keep his awe to himself. Or maybe he wouldn't, and would even tear up.

"If you keep on smiling like that, I will not be a gentleman and won't wait for us to be back to take you," Christian warned, freshly out of the shower. Ana smiled even brighter before she retorted,

"I already told you, I don't want you to be a gentleman. But you will have to wait to make me scream."

Christian looked deep in her eyes, before kissing her and letting her know, "You're all I have, Ana. No matter what happened in our life to come, never lose sight of that."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**‼️PLEASE DON'T BE A SILENT READER AND LEAVE A REVIEW**

**IT REALLY DOES HELP‼️**

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

💚** Sooooooo. As I said, there will be a sequel. I think I will publish it as a continuation of this one because I can be lazy sometimes XD **

💚** And yes, I did take some reviews personally because, well, they were personally aimed at me. The ones about the characters, I don't really mind. I understand that Christian is seen so highly, that's why I wrote in his POV, but I like flawed characters, and that's why Ana is flawed as well. She is spoilt, and she did use a guy to try and forget about another. Unfortunatelly, that is something that many people do on a daily basis, I am not defending her, just showing her pov. But anyway, to be honest, I was in a bad place when I wrote the last chapter, so just don't mind me ^^ **

**💚What was your favourite part****?**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚


	69. Prologue 2

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚** I have no idea how long this story is going to be, and how often I will update. **

💚** The story is already done in my head, and it will be from Ana's point-of-view, mostly. We will get a few other people, but I don't think Christian will have a part in this story, just like Ana didn't have one in the previous one. **

💚** And remember, Christian is five years older than Ana, and this story sets place in the Mafia world. The rating M isn't just about lemons but also about some theme that some of you might find hard. So you've been warned, don't complain about any of that. Hehe **

💚** Without further ado, here is the prologue. Shorter but necessary. This prologue will work a bit like the one in the previous story. It is a sneak peek of what is to come, but unlike Christian's story, it will not come back at the end of the story, but in the middle… **

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚

**.**

**PART 2 - THE MOBSTER'S WIFE**

**Prologue****: (0,5K)**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana woke up with her head pounding and her heart aching. She struggled to open her eyes, her tears from the previous night having dried to salt and making it difficult for her to see the light of the day. Without great conviction or will, she sat up in the clinical bed that brought her so much sorrow, doing her best to hold the new tears coming her way as she remembered her sorrows of the previous day, and she glanced at the chair where her husband had been sitting the previous night, not saying a word and watching her cry herself to sleep.

A lump grew in her throat when she found it empty, without any note for her to assure her that he would be back soon. She was alone. All alone once more, because she wasn't strong enough. At this moment, she would have given anything to be anyone else, to never had experienced this pain. She would rather be a poor girl without a penny to her name, she would rather be a suburban wife with bills and mortgages drowning her, she would rater be a naked Amazonian who knew nothing of the modern society and thought of planes as metal birds than be herself.

This was the second time she had to go through this pain, and it was even worse than the first time. This time she had hope, and it had been snatched away from her at the cruellest of time.

She curled on herself, crying over herself and wondering what was wrong with her. Why couldn't she be like everybody else? Why, of all the things, _this was_ what was denied to her? And why did she have to go through this alone once again?

She was married! Her husband was supposed to love her, through sickness and health! But he wasn't here. He didn't even hold her last night. He let her cry on her own, though there was more than enough space on that ridiculously large and soulless bed. He went back to his own life and left her all alone in the morning as if nothing happened.

Did he expect her to smile at him when she would see him again? Did he plan to pretend that nothing ever happened? _Did he even care_? She knew he loved her, but maybe the recent developments of their situation made him reevaluate that statement and think he would be better off without her. Maybe he wanted someone _normal_, after all.

As she kept on crying her heart out, her thoughts getting darker and darker by the minute, the door to her room opened, and revealed her father, with a pained expression on his face. He had been away for the last couple of days, and she tried to smile, because, despite her sorrows, she was happy to see him, but she never managed to turn her lips in the proper curve.

"Oh, sweetheart," Raymond said, walking to his daughter, and taking her in his arms as soon as she was at arm's length.

Ana burst into loud tears, sobbing in her father's comforting embrace, not caring that she was not a child anymore and simply crying her heart out to the man who had always been there for her, for as long as she could remember.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, here we go, let's get ready for this new story. I am rather excited, but before we dive into the lives of this Ana and Christian once again, I just want to state a few things:**

**~ Before any of you starts saying that either Christian or Ana seem out of character, remember that we are switching narrative, and therefore perspective. We will see both Ana and Christian through Ana's eyes. **

**~ I would like it, if, throughout the story, you remembered who Christian is, and how he was in the first story. Remember, this is Ana's tale, and we don't know much how she perceived Christian in the first story. **

💚** Now, I can't wait to read your ideas and speculation about what is going to happen in this story3, and what happened to Ana in this prologue …**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	70. Chapter 1: LOVE

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚** I just want to say a massive thank you to all of you who followed/favourited/reviewed the story already. Be sure to keep them coming and to share the story with those you think will like it. **

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 1****: L.O.V.E. by Nat King Cole (7,0K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

They did not stay long at the luxurious hotel in the countryside though Ana would have certainly not complained if they did. She kept it for herself, but now that she knew her father had known about her and Christian all along, she felt that he had orchestrated this whole thing to get them alone together.

Still, she enjoyed those couple of days when she had Christian all for herself. It reminded her of when they would go abroad and he would give her his undivided attention. Sure, she was sure that his mind went straight back to business when she was asleep, but the moments she was awake were for her and her alone.

Strangely enough, none of them talked about their separation of two years. It wasn't much that Ana wouldn't be honest about it, but she would rather not think about what Christian had been doing when he wasn't with her, and she was sure that the same went for him. They didn't even make up for their lost time. Of all the times they had to get back together, it had to be during _that _time for the month. They just … acted like a couple.

A real couple, without any sort of restriction from one or the other. They went to the movies, to restaurants, shopping (to Christian's greatest dismay). And during all their time together, Christian had his hand on her smaller back, as any other man would do in a relationship. And though she knew she had been the one to put a ban on their relationship, Ana couldn't help but love it.

Thinking about it, with the reassurance that her father was not going to try and break them apart, her fears did not make that much sense after all. She knew that her father loved her, and would never do something that would cause her pain. But more than that. Her father loved Christian like a son, and she remembered Mike much more than she remembered her mother. Raymond had loved his son, as much as he had loved her. Now, it made sense that he would not try and come between them.

The only inconvenience that happened during their getaway weekend was Lauren. To be honest, Ana hadn't even known she was here until they left and she shared the flight back home with them. She had been surprised to see her there and wondered what Christian's reaction would be. Surely, he didn't appreciate being followed around like a baby. Still, it gave her hope. Maybe she would manage to get Christian to convince her father to get rid of Lauren. It wasn't that she was bad per se, it was just that Ana didn't like the idea of being followed around like a little girl.

Once back in New York, Christian dropped her at her father's mansion, but she let him know that he would see her the same night. She just needed to pick a few things that would not make her feel like a guest in Christian's apartment. With a smile that she knew no one else saw, Christian gave her the key to his place, before kissing her and leaving her. She wondered for a second if he always carried around a spare key, or if he knew that she would be there before him.

Whilst she was packing a small suitcase of essentials, she Skyped her best friend, to finally let her know of the big change in her life. Though she had already told Elena, she knew that her Godmother had kept that information for herself, and maybe her husband. As soon as Kate answered the video call, Ana proudly shook her hand in front of the camera, presenting the magnificent ring Christian had given her.

"Oh no! He came back and you said yes!" Kate lamented with deception. Ana repressed a laugh, taking her phone in the bathroom so she could sort out the toiletry she wanted to take.

"It's not from Jack. It's from Christian."

There was a small silence, Kate trying to find logic in Ana's words. For the past two years, she had been telling Ana that though she understood her reasons, she didn't give their relationship a clean break. Mostly because she just cut ties, without explaining why to Christian. And as she often said, how could he make amend, if he did not know his crime?

"Since when you and Christian are back together?"

"Since Friday night, when he proposed to me with that beautiful ring."

"I don't get it. I thought you didn't want to see '_his stupid Raymond-Steele-loving face ever again_'?"

Ana glared at her best friend. "First of all, you're _my_ best friend! You're not supposed to throw back at me what I said in anger. Second … you were right."

She had said the latter part in a really small voice, because being stubborn as she was, she didn't like admitting that she had been wrong. But of course, Kate being Kate grinned, and asked,

"Sorry, I didn't get that last part. The connection is bad. Can you repeat a bit louder the part when you say that I am right and you were wrong."

The brunette decided to ignore her best friend boasting and took her toiletries to her room to put them in her suitcase. Which did not go unnoticed by Kate.

"Are you moving in with him?"

"Not really. It's more the other way around. But we're staying at his place until the wedding."

"You're both going to live with Uncle Ray?" Ana could see why Kate was surprised. To be honest, she had expected Christian to be the one to raise an issue about this. Mostly because living with her father would impose restrictions, such as no sex out of nowhere, whenever they felt like it. But …

"I don't want to leave my Dad alone, Kate. I know it would be too hard for him."

"And Christian is okay with that?"

"He didn't object."

She glanced at the screen, just in time to see Kate rolling her eyes, but she didn't hold it against her. No matter how much Kate loved Raymond, she couldn't understand. Ana was all he had left. Unlike Kate's parents who had each other, Raymond had no one else but his daughter. His wife was gone, his son was gone, his best friend was gone. He just had her now.

"Well, I have some happy news of my own. Elliott and I are coming back next month."

"Visiting?"

"No. We're moving back. We just … want to be in New York again."

Ana cheered, ahoy beyond words that her best friend was coming back to her and that she would get to see her on a regular basis, and not once every other weekend.

They talked about a few other mundane things, though Ana had the feeling that Kate didn't explain the real reason why she and Elliott were coming back home; and they ended the conversation when Ana was done with the packing. She was tempted to take her car, but the suitcase was too heavy for her to handle, so she called for a taxi. She couldn't help but smile when the yellow car drove her to Christian. How many times has she done this trip, with the hope that she would have the guts to talk to Christian, before chickening out last second? Now, she was going there as his _fiancée_ with a big rock on her finger to prove it.

Once in Christian's place, the first thing she did was look for Bastille, hoping that Christian didn't get rid of the cat when he got rid of her stuff. She found him on the terrace, looking at her with curiosity. She wondered if the cat had forgotten about her over the past couple of years. After all, she left when he was still young. She walked to the cat, to pet him, but Bastille dodged her hand and sprinted away from her, not without looking at her in a way she was sure was a glare.

She swallowed with difficulty, trying to reassure herself, thinking that she was analysing things that weren't meant to be analysed, and went in the kitchen space to pour herself a glass of water. there, she had the surprise to find Mia, with the flat's keys in hand, looking at her with big blue eyes.

"What are you doing here?' She asked, before squinting her eyes at her left hand, spotting the ring ornamenting her finger.

Ana suddenly felt very self-conscious. This was not how she had meant for Mia to find out about Christian and her. But in all honesty, she did not know how she had meant for her to find out. Mia was a friend to both Christian and her, and they still both kept the secret from her. Ana knew that she would be hurt if she learnt that her best friends had held something so big from her.

"Well … uh … You know that ex I was telling you about … It's Christian, and … he proposed Friday night, and I said yes … So here I am."

Mia looked deep in her eyes, not saying anything, before she walked to a cupboard and looked for food for the cat, leaving Ana in distress. She didn't want her friend to sever ties with her because she held a secret from her.

"Please, don't be mad. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. It's just … it was complicated."

"Not really. It's actually really simple. I like you, Ana. I really do. But I _love _Christian. Like a brother, don't get me wrong. We are strictly platonic, and nothing ever happened, or ever will. still, no matter what you mean to me, Christian means more. And I'm not looking forward to the next time you're going to break his heart.

Christian will never admit it to you because he is a proud man, but you really broke him. I had to go and pick him up drunk out of his mind because you refused his proposal without a simple explanation. I had to see him question himself as a man because you never told him why you broke up with him. I had to see him swallow his pain whilst you were batting your lashes at other men.

So, yes, it's pretty simple to me. Once you will be tired of the novelty of this wedding, you will break his heart again, and I'm not looking forward to that."

Ana held her tears, hurt as much by the words, as by the reality of them. Though she was too much of a friend to say it, Mia was basically calling her a selfish flickering bitch.

"I didn't mean to cause him pain," She said with a small voice, looking down on the floor.

Mia poured some water in Bastille's bowl, as she retorted, "Didn't you? Then why did you go out with Paul barely two weeks after your breakup?"

The truth was, she had hoped to make Christian jealous and reach out to her. She had been too much of a chicken to be the one doing the first step, so she had hoped Christian would do it if he saw her with someone she knew he disliked.

Still, the words that came out of her mouth were more defensive than anything else, "He was with that friend of yours as well. And more than once, if I recall properly."

She remembered seeing Christian with that beautiful redhead who had such long legs and him bringing her as his plus one on several occasions, exchanging pleasantries with her and always making sure she was in his vicinity. And according to Mia, Angela was a really friendly girl when it came to men she liked.

Mia condescendingly shook her head, "Christian never touched Angela even once. As I said, he was heartbroken, and you never gave him closure. And even at the time, you could have made it all better for the two of you, you chose to keep your grief to yourself. Don't you think Christian would have liked to be there for you?"

Ana clenched her jaw, not wanting to think back of that particular moment, and Mia clearly saw in her eyes that the pain Ana once felt was not completely gone. She inhaled deeply before she said,

"Christian will probably have my head for telling you any of this, anyway. You can do no wrong in his eyes. He obviously loves you, and the ring he made for you is proof enough. I just … I think you ought to know. I know Christian can appear cold, and I'll be honest, I don't know how he is with you. But remember that behind this ice statue he seems to be, he is actually a man with deep feelings for you. Make sure that if you stay, it's for the long term, because I don't think I would forgive you for breaking his heart another time."

Then, on those words, she left. Ana shuddered, repressing a sob. No matter how hard Mia could be, this was one of the reasons she liked her because she was true. She didn't try to sugar coat her or anything. She went straight to the truth.

With Mia's words still ringing in her ears, Ana went upstairs, in order to unload her suitcase, but her tears finally broke loose when she got in Christian's bedroom. No matter how hard Mia's truth was, it was nothing compared to actually seeing it. Everything was still there. The pictures of them she had put on the wall, the book she had been reading on her nightstand. She opened the drawer she used to have and saw that her clothes were still there. And went she went to the bathroom, she saw all her old toiletries there, even her toothbrush.

She sat on the floor of the bathroom, leaning against the bathtub, and crying softly. At this right moment, she couldn't help but see her father in Christian. She remembered when she once snuck in her father's room, in the hope to find a picture of her mother. She remembered how the seven years old girl that she was marvelled at finding the room as if a woman still used it. The fine clothes her mother used to wear, the perfumes she used to spray on herself, the makeup she used to apply on. It was only years later that she understood how sad it was. To the little girl without a mother, it seemed like heaven. To anyone else, it was unhealthy to stay in one's grief and to not move on.

And though she was not dead, Christian did not even try to move on from her. And no matter how wrong she knew it was, she couldn't help but feel so loved at this very moment. More than ever, she wished her mother was alive, so she could ask her when she knew that her father loved her that much.

With a deep sigh, Ana wiped her tears and put her things where she would need them, getting rid of her old toiletries. She knew they would be clean, Christian was a neat-freak, but they were all old and probably out of date, anyway.

It took her most of the day to put everything in place, and after cooking a quick something, she jumped in the shower to get rid of the sweat of the day. When she left the boiling water, she had the good surprise to see Christian smiling at her at the entrance of the bathroom.

"I thought you said you would finish late," She exclaimed, wrapping herself in a towel. Christian smiled, and walked to her, nuzzling his nose in her neck,

"I thought you'd appreciate the surprise."

She leaned against him, smiling at their reflection, but she saw that the smile never reached her eyes. And Christian saw it too because his reflection was now frowning, looking at her with worry.

"What's wrong?"

She shook her head, not wanting to burden him more than necessary, and stepped out of his embrace. She was about to dismiss the thought, when her eyes fell on her hairbrush, the same that she had left here two years ago.

"I just noticed that all my stuff were still here …"

She saw how his face quickly passed from worry to nothing, like every time something personal was brought up. She had learnt to live with it. She knew that he was a private man and that no one else even saw the little emotions he showed her.

She took a deep breath, not wanting to take the next step, but knowing it was necessary, "Did you … see anyone whilst we were … separated?"

"I'd rather not talk about that period of time. I don't want to hear about you and your rebounds," He said, his voice so cold that she felt goosebump rise on her arms.

So he had been avoiding the topic on purpose. She had thought that maybe he had been simply enjoying the weekend that had been given to them, and did not realise that they hadn't talked about it. But it was Christian. Of course, he knew that they never talked about the two years they were apart, and apparently, he was not planning on talking about them. Was it because he was still heartbroken about it like Mia said, or because he didn't want to admit that he was the reason she had been dumped twice?

Still, it bothered her that he never tried to rebound himself, and that was the reason why, she took his face in her small hands, and let him know,

"Christian, no matter how much I love my Dad, I don't want you to turn up like him. If something were to ever happen to me —" She was stopped by Christian ticking at that. It was obviously something he did not like to think. She gently smiled and continued,

"If something were to ever happen to me, I don't want you to wallow in the memory of me. I would want you to find the will to move on."

She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to give his word that he would do as she asked. But when he remained silent, she knew that it was a lost cause, Christian would rather stay in his sadness than move on. She knew he was not saying anything because he had never made her a promise that he did not hold. He was a man of his word, and even death wouldn't make him break his word.

And no matter how much she loved Christian, and how much it made her feel loved, it still frightened her a little. How many women at the shelter had told her stories of partners who loved them too much, who loved them so much that their love turned to obsession and their partners became emotionally (and sometimes physically) abusive.

Still, she shook away the feeling. Though he had been raised by the streets, Ana knew that Christian had very high respect for women in general. Mia was the easiest example. Christian never treated her as an ex-hooker, and never used her past against her. He never pretended as if it didn't exist either. He simply took the blonde girl as a human being.

With a weak smile, she stood on her toes and pecked his lips, and finally said the thing that she knew she should have said long ago, "I am sorry for the past two years. It is all my fault. I just … I was just scared."

She saw him slightly frown before his hand slowly came to her face and wiped a tear she hadn't even realised shedding, and he said with a knowing smile,

"You've seen Mia, haven't you?"

She didn't question how he actually knew that, and she knew that of all the people on that Earth, there was no point in lying to Christian. He would know immediately.

"I'm sorry," She repeated.

He kissed away the few other tears that came, and he swept her off her feet to take her in the bedroom. "I'm sorry as well. I know I am not the most demonstrative guy out there. It's just not in my nature. But if you ever doubt how I feel about you, just say so."

His outburst surprised her, though she did not comment on it. As he said, he was not a really forthcoming person. A part of herself wondered if Mia had a talk with him as well, or Jose probably. After all, Jose was Christian's best friend, this was the kind of advice he would give to his friend.

Christian left Ana in the room, letting her know that he would take a quick shower, which made her smile to herself. At least she knew she would never get some bacteria from that man. He was a neat freak. She couldn't remember even one time when he didn't take a shower after coming home … Besides the night of his birthday. No matter how impatient she had been to get him to jump her, he always took the time to take a quick shower.

For a moment, she pondered in front of the wardrobe, not sure of what to wear for the night. Before she settled for one of the night-gown she had left here. The blue one that Christian had always liked very much. When she turned around, Christian was already back his towel hanging on his hips, his eyes eating her up with obvious desire.

Ana smiled, appreciating that his body was just as she remembered. Maybe she should hit the gym again to get as tone as he was. When their eyes met, Christian took a deliberate effort to look away and strode to the drawers to retrieve some pyjamas trousers. As silently as she could, Ana walked to him, and hugged him from behind as she luxuriously said,

"There used to be a time when this gown would be on the floor by the minute you saw me in it."

Christian tensed at her words, whilst she gently kissed his back and played with the top of his towel. She knew why he was restraining himself, he thought she was still on her period, and so she let him know,

"I think it's time for us to christen our engagement."

The words were barely out of her mouth that she was already laying on the bed, Christian claiming her mouth with passion. She happily gave him access to her tongue, losing herself in the sensations he awoke in her. With urgency, she reached for the towel, eager to take his monster-cock in her hand, but Christian stopped her from doing so.

He pinned her hands above her head, taking them both in one of his large hands, and whispered huskily in her ear, "Tonight you are mine and mine only. Tonight all your pleasures will come from me, and me only."

And just as he finished his promise, he nibbled on her earlobe. Ana closed her eyes, happily surrendering to this man who knew her body better than anybody else, better than herself; and she smiled with pleasure when he started to kiss every inch of her skin.

In her short life, Ana didn't really have that many men in her bed, so she couldn't tell if she had been unlucky, or if it was Christian being the rare exception; but she knew that beside Christian, she never had such a dedicated lover. She knew that she shouldn't compare men, but Christian brought it to a whole other level. It wasn't because of his monster-cock, it was because he made it a mission to make sure she would be left satisfied with every inch of her being. And he was always really thorough with it.

He never went down on her begrudgingly, he never orgasmed if she hadn't already, and he always made sure she was comfortable with what he was doing to her. And he had those small attentions. Like the way he would kiss his way back up, to erase the taste of herself when he would kiss her again, or the way he would gently test her flexibility before going at it or not, or the way he would look at her as if she was the best thing that ever happened to him. She liked how he always looked at her, at her eyes. _She_ was what mattered to him, not her body, not what she looked like, but _she_.

A sweet tease of his teeth on her nipple brought her to the present moment, ripping a loud moan out of her. Her hands tentatively tried to go for his messy mane, but he brought them back up immediately, all the whilst sucking on her breast. She felt her insides built up and tried to press her legs together for a little friction.

Christian looked up, a playful smirk plastered on his lips as he finally let go of her hands to keep her legs in place. She wondered if she should push her luck, and move her hands, but she didn't want to ruin their reunion. She liked how kinky they could get once in a while, and she didn't mind being bound and completely in Christian's power from time to time. But this night was their reunion, and she didn't want to add any sort of kink like that to it.

So she kept her hands up, watching Christian slowly an agonisingly kiss his way down, his eyes never leaving hers. When he finally reached her mount, he simply blew on it, making her try to arch herself so his mouth would be where she wanted it the most at that very moment. He played with her for a while, before finally nibbling her clit, making her scream a loud and guttural "Yes!", throwing her head back.

She kept her eyes closed, curling her toes as his tongue played with her folds, and his teeth with her clit. There was just one word to describe what he was doing to her at the moment, he was feasting on her. His hands were steady on her hips, stopping her from moving too much as he brought on wave and wave of pleasure, his tongue always probing further down.

"God! _Christian_! Yes!" She chanted, feeling her insides swirl with something sweet and delectable. It was coming strong, and if she simply let go at that moment, she would climax, but she didn't want to just yet. She wanted to _feel him_.

"Please, _please_, take me!" She begged, thrashing her head, and all notions of control over her arms forgotten.

Christian stopped for a moment, making her look down to his head between her legs and see him frown with a mix of concern and slight anger. She wondered what she had done wrong, and before she could ask, he explained,

"I don't think this is an option for tonight. I haven't bought condoms in a long long time."

Ana stared at Christian for half a second, wondering if her next words would be mood killers, or if they would help the night get even better. "I'm still on the pill, and … well, you're the only guy I ever got bare with."

She didn't want to mention Jack if she could avoid it, especially at a time like that. For a moment, she wondered if Christian was going to doubt her words, but she immediately dismissed the thought. She knew Christian trusted her, as much as she trusted him.

Christian didn't say a word, crawling back up, and kissing her hard, losing his hand in her massive hair, and though she tasted her salty self on his tongue, she happily opened her mouth, and her legs, to him. He dropped his towel, but when she had expected to feel him slide inside of her, she felt nothing. She just heard him say,

"Look at me, babe. I want your eyes to be on me tonight."

She opened her eyes, meeting his grey orbs and wondering if this night he was more insisting of eye contact because of … her rebound.

Slowly, he slid inside her, filling her up with delight and pleasure, and seeming to never stop until it felt like the tip of his penis could touch her womb. She loved to feel him inside of her though she was always impressed that the small thing that she was could take the big thing that he had.

Slowly, Christian began his back and forth, bringing her knees to the level of her breast, and never breaking eye contact with her. She brought her hands to his face, grasping his hair and loving how his eyes made her feel inside. She was so overwhelmed that she closed her eyes, to feel him on a deeper level.

Christian slammed into her, making her yelp, half in surprise, half in pleasure. He repeated the motion, again and again, demanding of her, "Look at me, babe."

She opened her eyes, getting lost in the steel of his as his moves became more brusque and curter. His hands were all over her body, trying to touch her all over at once, and when she felt her insides build up in something extraordinary, Christian flipped them over, so she would be on top of him.

One of his hand got a grip on her hair, whilst the other helped her find a new rhythm in this new position. This was one of her favourite position and they both knew it. She laid on top of him and moved so that his pelvic bone would stimulate her clitoris whilst his abnormally large cock filled her up.

Though he never broke eye contact with her, Christian let her have control of the speed she wanted to go. At first, she tried to take it slow, but the more she looked at him, the more she felt overwhelmed by love. Without even realising it, she increased her pace, planting her nails in his arms, reaching for climax, something almost animalistic taking over her.

And finally, she reached it. Finally, she became undone, falling limp on Christian's chest as she said, happy and sated, "God, I love you."

She felt him chuckle beneath her, before finding herself back on the mattress, her back facing Christian as he told her, "I love you too. But I'm far from done with you. I'm going to wear you out tonight."

At the promise echoing in his voice and words, Ana couldn't help but giggle, propping her ass up as an invitation for him to make good on his promises. Which he did. All night long.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

When Ana woke up the next day, the clock on the wall indicated that it was past one in the afternoon, and though she should have felt guilty to have stayed in bed for so long, she didn't. She couldn't help but smile gleefully at the reminiscence of the previous night. Christian only let her rest when the first light came through the window.

To be honest, she was feeling achy and crampy, because of all the activities she endured in the last few hours, and yet her body has never been so relaxed.

With a happy smile, she rolled out of bed, finding Bastille haughtily looking at her from the doorframe. She waved at the cat, who turned his head and walked away, making her wonder once again, if the cat was mad at her for leaving him, or if he simply didn't remember her.

She slipped on a robe, and went to the bathroom, her whole body screaming at the recollection of last night. Christian had never been a rough lover. Every time he had been, it was because she had asked him. But last night it seemed that Christian had been less in touch with his natural control, or more in touch with his instincts. And her feminine intuition was telling her it was because he had wanted to erase Jack from her memory. If only he knew that her body never managed to forget about him …

Her stomach grumbled, and she thought of the dinner she had made the previous night and that they never got the chance to eat. instead, she had been the meal. Of course, at that precise moment, she could eat about anything. Leftovers seemed like a good idea, though she wasn't sure how she was going to heat it. Christian didn't have a microwave.

But when she got downstairs, she had the surprise to find both Christian and her father in the kitchen, eating what seemed to be Chinese takeout. She thanked the heavens for having the good sense to not walk around naked, and to have a robe on, and tried to brightly smile when they both greeted her.

"Don't you guys ever work?" She teased, putting on a brave face.

She was not going to lie, it felt weird to have her father in this apartment, with her in a robe. Especially after what happened the night before. She felt her blood rise to her cheeks and did everything she could to not look in Christian's direction. instead, she went to the coffee machine, grateful that coffee had already been made (probably by her father, since Christian didn't drink any).

She sat next to Christian, though in a more formal position than the one she usually had when alone with him. Though a part of her mind reminded her that she would have to learn to live with it if she wanted to leave with her father. She shouldn't be so self-conscious around him.

"I was actually asking Christian when do you plan to move out when you came in," Raymond said, the most naturally in the world.

Ana sipped on her coffee, watching her father, and hearing the question he didn't actually ask. _When would she be leaving him, all alone in that big mansion_?

"We were thinking of the other way around. We move in with you. I can't decently leave you alone, your health would drop dramatically if I'm not here to check," She said, looking pointedly at the Chinese carton boxes.

Raymond smirked, but Ana still saw the relief in his eyes, "I can behave. You can check, it's all vegan."

"Good. Then, I can let you behave until the wedding?"

The three of them knew that she wasn't talking about food. She was asking him if he could stay alone until Christian and she would get married. Raymond nodded, before he got up, checking his phone. Then he kissed Ana's forehead and left.

She waited to hear the front door click to turn to Christian, and ask, "What was that all about?"

She found it very strange that her father came out of nowhere to have lunch with Christian when during the whole time she and Christian had been together, it never happened. Christian smiled to her, taking her feet to rest them on his lap, as he informed,

"I think your father just wanted to make sure you were not kicking him out of your life. He has been delaying his departure for a good two hours. And left as soon as you assured him that you would not abandon him."

"Don't be ridiculous. Dad knows I would _never_ abandon him."

Christian did not reply anything, but she could tell that he thought otherwise. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head at him and his crazy ideas.

"I'm off to Columbia tomorrow. Care to come with me?" He lightly asking, changing the topic, all the while grabbing the newspaper.

Ana carefully studied him, trying to figure out if he wanted her to come or not. Maybe he was just being polite, and asking her by default. And if she was honest, she was not really looking forward to going abroad with Christian whilst he was working, if it meant she had to stay at the hotel like she had to do when she was younger with her father.

"Is it work or vacations?" She asked though she already knew the answer. Christian looked up from his newspaper, one of his eyebrow up, and she smiled to herself. As if Christian took time off for himself.

"Well, I think I will stay here with Elena and organise the wedding with her."

Christian nodded, not trying to convince her to follow him even the slightest, and she was relieved he didn't. He knew her well enough to know she would rather stay here than locked in a hotel.

She kept on sipping on her coffee and started dreaming out loud about what she wanted for their wedding. Ethan was getting married next month, and she was happy about that. She wouldn't have to postpone her own, so they wouldn't have to share the year of their marriages. She wanted a summer wedding, with a big reunion and a princess dress. She wanted to get married in a church, and her father to walk her down the aisle. Of course, she wanted a white dress, even if she wasn't a virgin, and she wanted flower girls as well.

At some point, she stopped her passionate speech, and glared at Christian, sure that he was not paying single attention to what she was saying.

"Though I might ruin my beautiful dress if I have a chocolate fountain. I think I will just go naked."

Christian had a small smirk, turning the page of his newspaper, as he informed, "Be careful whom you invite, then. Friend or foe, I'll kill anyone who gets to see you naked."

She rolled her eyes, though she was pleased to see that he had been listening to her. "My ob-gyn sees me naked rather a lot, you know. You're not going to go and kill him?" She meant it as a joke, but a part of her wasn't really sure.

Christian folded the paper and looked at her, mirth in his eyes, though there was some seriousness there as well. "I can make an exception for that doctor. But that doesn't mean I like the idea of others seeing you naked."

"I was just joking around," She assured him.

"But I'm not. Last night, ... I discovered something about myself that I did not like, Ana, because I cannot control it. I am a jealous man. When it comes to you, I can get very jealous and …" He paused for a moment, before taking a deep breath and saying, "I'm sorry I took it out on you."

So she had been right, their lovemaking had been different, not just because of the reunion, but because Christian had been trying to make a point. She smiled, taking his hand in hers, and assuring him,

"It's alright, I sure didn't complain. And if I recall properly, I did tell you several times that I like it when you let go of your control."

He smiled at her, his eyes going to her hair, before playing with a wild lock. "As for the wedding, I'd rather not have it in May. It's your birthday month."

Ana couldn't agree more. She brightly smiled, getting up to get herself something to eat, when she thought this would be a good time as any to ask, "I want to invite your parents to the wedding."

She didn't turn back to look at him straight away, the sour memory of his anger still here. Truth be told, she had stayed in contact with Grace Grey, even after she and Christian broke up. She just felt so bad for the mother.

"If that's what you want," Christian placidly said. Cary turned to look at his face and only saw indifference there.

"I think we should tell them the news over dinner when you come back. Maybe Dad could come with us, —"She started, hoping he wouldn't object. After all, he did say that as long as she didn't go behind his back.

Christian chuckled, getting up and walking to her. "I don't need moral support to go and see the Greys, babe. I will do it for you because you obviously care, but I personally don't. Let me know when you have a date and place."

Then he kissed her, his lips staying a bit longer on hers than for a simple goodbye. "Now, I recall you complaining I don't work enough. I should be back early again tonight."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, the first chapter, on the go. I decided to do things a bit differently in this story. Instead of asking questions, I won't be able to answer you, I will give you an inkling on what I want you to focus on. If you think it's a bad or a good idea, let me know, and I will go accordingly. **

**~ Ana does not know the dark side her father has. She does not suspect the least in the world that he has anything to do with Mike's death, or that his first instincts when he learnt about Christian and her were to get rid of Christian. Christian has a better understanding of Raymond's dark side than Ana does.**

**~Mia's and Ana's friendship won't survive a fallout between our couple if ever there is one. Plus Mia implied something here. Something she knows and Christian doesn't. **

**~Christian is seen differently. Remember, we are now in Ana's eyes. She does not know how Christian thinks because he rarely shares those moments, especially when they become personal. Like his jealousy. He only mentioned it, because he feels bad about it, and feels like he cheated Ana out of a sweeter moment.**

**~I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless. Though I'm sure many of you enjoyed the lemon, haha.**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	71. Chapter 2: My Guy

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚** I just want to say a massive thank you to all of you who followed/favourited/reviewed the story already. Be sure to keep them coming and to share the story with those you think will like it. **

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 2****: My Guy by Mary Wells (6,2K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

During the two days Christian was away in Mexico, Ana stayed with her father, though she busied herself with Elena all days long. She couldn't wait for her best friend to be back, so the three of them could plan her wedding the same way they had planned Kate's. A small part of her was a bit pained that Mia was not involved in her future happiness, but she knew that if asked, Mia would rather be Christian's best mate than hers. She didn't hold it against the blonde girl, it just made her a bit sad.

Elena seemed really enthusiast at the idea of Ana getting married, which made her miss a little bit less her mother. No matter how much she tried not to show it, she couldn't help but wish her mother had been there for her, doing everything Elena was doing with her to get her perfect wedding. Still, she never mentioned it to her Godmother and even less to her father.

And in all honesty, she was glad that her father was also really involved in the plans for her wedding. She never thought he would actually be so hands-on, even giving out a few addresses he thought would be better for her. Christian, on the other hand, did not seem that into that whole wedding preparation thing. He paid attention to what she wanted and what she told him over the phone, but he never said anything about what he wanted for their special day. Except for the fact that he didn't want to share the month with her own birthday.

Still, Ana wanted someone else involved in this wedding, if not because of tradition, at least to give Grace Grey that one thing out of her son's life. She had stayed in a rather distant and polite relationship with the woman, feeling bad for the mother who lost a son for reasons that were completely out of her control. She had tried to understand Christian's point-of-view, and in a way she did, but that didn't mean that she couldn't put herself in Grace's shoes.

That was mainly the reason why she had stayed in contact with Christian's mother, even when they were separated. She couldn't imagine not knowing about her children if she ever got some, and if she could spare Grace the pain of not uncertainty, she would.

So she organised a dinner at a restaurant for the night Christian would be back, knowing in her heart of heart, that no matter what, Christian would never be happy to entertain his parents in his own home. He might do it for her, but it would be begrudgingly, and there was already enough resentment to not add to that fire. Ana pondered for a long time as to which location and settled to go to Ethan's restaurant, asking him to book a private room for them. If Christian was to get angry, at least there wouldn't be an audience.

Grace seemed so happy to have this opportunity to see her son again that it got Ana a bit worried. She knew Christian, and she knew that he was only doing that for her. He wasn't looking forward to seeing his parents, on the contrary. So a few hours before they were all supposed to meet, she texted Mrs Grey and let her know,

**I** **know those past decades have been hard for you, and I can't even begin to imagine how hard it must have been for the past two years to not be able to speak to your son after finally finding him. But I think it would be for the best of you didn't try to fix that relationship that the three of you lost. I think it would be best for every one of you view Christian as a new friend and not as a son, and start building a new relationship out of that. You might think that I am out of line, and I know nothing, but Christian grew up to be a proud man who doesn't let go easily. So I think it would be best for your heart and his pride if you put the parent-child relationship to the past, and simply saw him as a potential good friend. ~ Ana**

Grace didn't reply anything, though the message was marked as read an hour before the dinner, and all Ana could do was hope that she hadn't stepped on some sort of line and offended the woman or her husband.

She waited for Christian to come back from his business trip and together they went to the restaurant, Christian not trying even once to get out of it. She could have gone ahead and told the text face to face to Christian's parents, whilst waiting for him, but she wanted to erase as much as possible that first meeting Christian had with his parents when she arranged another dinner. That time, she had waited for him at the restaurant, and it did not end well.

On their way there, Ana filled the silence, talking about the coming gala for her charity the very next night. She was really excited because it would be their first official outing as a couple, and she couldn't wait to brag in front of certain friends. Christian warned her that he had a few things to deal with beforehand and that he would join her there later on, and for a second, Ana hesitated on asking more about what he had to do.

She wasn't stupid, she knew exactly what kind of business Christian and her father had, but she had always masterfully avoided anything related to it with her father. With Christian on the other hand, she knew that he was just waiting for her to say the word. This was one of the things she wouldn't be able to take away from Christian, he had always been honest with her. Even when it would have been better for him not to. She could tell Christian didn't like that shade of grey they were in, but she wasn't really eager to cross that line either. Especially not when they were on their way to meet her future in-laws.

Once they got to the restaurant, Ethan's manager showed them to their private room, where Grace and Carrick were already sitting, sipping on water. Christian's mother brightly smiled to them, obviously happy to see her son, and Christian politely greeted her and her husband after Ana.

"Thank you so much for seeing us on such short notice," Ana said with her best cheery voice, hoping to lighten up the tension she could feel thickening in the air.

Grace devoured her son with her eyes as he sat next to his girl, before snapping out of it and turning to Ana, as she rectified the brunette, "No, thank you for having us."

Ana brightly smiled, aware that she was putting more effort into that conversation than usual, and she briefly glanced at Christian, only to see that he was completely normal. Sure he wasn't all smiles and giggles, but she had noticed that outside of their personal moments, she had never seen Christian smile, or simply be carefree. A part of her liked it because it meant that it was something that only she had ever seen. But she wished he would try to let go a bit for his parents' sake.

Still, as the dinner went along, she understood that Christian _really_ didn't care much about his parents. It wasn't a facade to make himself look tougher, it was a fact. She had seen Christian on several business diners with her father, and the way he interacted with his parents was the same as he did with any other person. And though it made her sad, it still made her hopeful. Just like she had said in her text, maybe the connection as a family was broken, but maybe he would find it in himself to see them as friends in the future.

After they ordered their desserts, Ana took Christian's hand in his, and let the Grey parents know, "So, the reason we asked you to come today is that we are going to get married, and we would like for you to come to the wedding."

Grace swooned, congratulating them, though Ana was sure that she had known since Christian and she had walked to them. Though she was not a lefty and hadn't used her left hand that much, it wasn't easy to hide a ring such as the one Christian had gotten her, and Ana had caught Grace glancing at her left-hand several times throughout dinner.

Still, she couldn't help but feel a cold vibe coming from Christian's father. For a second, she wondered why, when she recalled that in the disastrous evening she had met them, Carrick had been asking a few questions about Christian's activities. If anything, he didn't seem pleased by the direction of the life of his son as taking. After all, who was her father was a secret to no one, and Ana knew that Christian was often linked to her father in the media, though she never talked about it to either of them.

"When is the wedding?" He asked, clearly not as enthusiast as his wife. Ana kept her smile on, though she could tell that something in Christian's position had changed. She didn't know how he did it since it looked like he hadn't moved, but he seemed a bit more on the defensive.

"In the summer of next year. We still haven't booked the place, but you will receive an invitation as soon as we know," She said, addressing directly to Carrick with her best smile. The man nodded, though he was looking at Christian at that moment, but, before another word could be uttered, Christian's phone rang.

Ana had heard his phone vibrate several times throughout the dinner, but Christian never reached to check his messages, which she appreciated. But now that someone was calling him, it seemed he couldn't keep ignoring whoever was trying to reach him. So he got up, excusing himself and leaving the table for a moment.

As soon as Christian left them alone, Carrick let the brunette know, "Don't take me wrong, Ana. I'm happy for you, I'm just not sure Christian is the right man for you."

"_Carrick_!"

"He's my son, and no matter what he does, nothing will change that. But ... I read the news and ... you two seem so different. Not without mentioning that he doesn't look like the marrying type. Or even the family type for that matter."

"He is," Ana assured because she knew that what Christian wanted more than anything in the world were children. "He's just ... very good at keeping to himself."

She didn't want to tell them that part of Christian being who he was, was because of them. It seemed unnecessary to bring them such pain when they were already feeling bad enough about how their son turned out to be. In her heart of heart, Ana knew that Christian would never forgive his parents for leaving him. But she still hoped that they would be able to enjoy meals like this one from time to time.

Christian came back as Grace and Ana were talking about wedding plans and arrangements. He took her hand in his, gently squeezing it as if to reassure her that everything was okay. For a moment, only the two women talked, until Grace let the brunette know that she still had many things from her own wedding that she could lend to her for something old and something borrowed.

At that, Christian objected, "Let's not jinx the family we are trying to build here with cursed objects that did not bring you a happy family."

Ana turned to him, embarrassed for his parents, but Christian simply looked at them, his eyes icy and cold. Then, he got up, prompting Ana to do the same, and politely said, "We will see you again soon. It was nice seeing you."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

A couple of days after that awkward dinner with Christian's parents, Ana was hosting a gala for her charity. Christian had promised to be there, though he warned her in advance that he would probably be late there, hinting that his own obligations would delate him. She knew that once again, Christian had given her an opening to so about his job and that, once again she chickened out, though she knew that the conversation was long due and that if she kept on postponing it, Christian would find a way to put the matter on the table, without her having a choice to run.

Still, she would rather do it at a different time. She knew who Christian was, she knew who she would be getting married to, she knew Christian was not the ideal Prince Charming. She simply never really acknowledged that fact to him. Probably because Christian had always been brutally honest to her and that she knew he wouldn't sugarcoat the truth for her.

But whenever that long-overdue conversation would occur, it wasn't for this night.

When Ana arrived at the gala, she was accompanied by Jose and Ethan, though she knew that Lauren was lurking somewhere in her shadow, since she still didn't find the time to convince Christian to get rid of her. She had to admit that she had expected Jose to say something to her, given the fact that he was Christian's best friend, and that she was now Christian's fiancée, but Jose never mentioned anything about it. Even when Ethan commented on her ring in the car ride, Jose remained silent, making Ana wonder if maybe he disapproved of the relationship, as Mia did. A part of her was a bit saddened by it, feeling that she would never be good enough in the eyes of Christian's friends.

The gala in itself was rather dull and uneventful, though she was happy that it managed to generate several hundreds of thousands of dollars for her cause. Winter would be there soon enough, and she knew that her dream of seeing New York free of homeless was far from coming true. still, she would be able to help many of them this year, just like she had been doing for the past three years.

There were many people that she liked, and many that she didn't particularly hold in her heart, but who were still socialites who were rather generous toward her cause. So she played the perfect hostess, thanking every person as if seeing them had been the highlight of her night, though she was often glancing toward the entrance to see when Christian would appear.

Something that she had not anticipated, was people commenting on the new addition to her jewellery and asking who was the lucky lad. Ana kept postponing the reveal, wanting Christian to be there when she would do so. Maybe it was because it was a public event, meaning that the media were here, ready to misinterpret every single one of her word, or maybe because this was how Christian and she could finally officialise to all their engagement, but she still waited for her fiancé to come.

Which he did, halfway through the evening, accompanied by her father and by Ryan. As soon as he spotted her, he strode to her, and kissed her before apologising, "Sorry for the delay. I had to get changed before coming."

She smiled, pecking once more his lips, though a part of her wondered why did he need to get changed. Christian was known for many things, but dressing casually was not one of them. She was sure he could have walked straight from whatever meeting that held him back, and blend in the crowd perfectly … That was if he had been to a proper meeting.

"What shall I get you?" He asked, looking toward the bar, but she shook her head.

"Nothing. I'm actually bursting. Can you hold my bag, whilst I go freshen up … unless you want to come and help me …"

Christian seemed to think about it for a moment, before he shook his head, and kissed her forehead, "I'll hold you up to that one."

Ana shook her head, smiling, and went to the bathroom to relieve her bladder, feeling like this was probably the best sensation in the world at that right moment. Once she was done, she made sure she looked proper, rearranging her hair and straightening the few rumple of her blue dress, when someone entered the bathroom as well.

She turned her head, politely smiling, and saw with surprise that it was Suzannah. She wasn't really surprised to find Suzannah at the gala, Suzannah was a socialite just like her, and she had always been rather generous toward charities. But Ana had hoped to not get in one-on-one with her. In fact, ever since Christian had 'dated' the girl, Ana had always done her best to avoid her, with grace and tactfulness.

"I was hoping to talk to you in private, Anastasia," The ginger girl said, making Ana feel trapped. She couldn't really refuse that to the girl, without being blatantly rude.

"I know that our fathers are … not in the best of terms, but you've always been nice and courteous to me, and I feel like I should return the favour."

"What do you mean?"

Suzannah looked down at her hands, clearly looking for her words, before she asked without preamble, "Are you engaged to Christian Grey?"

"Yes."

Suzannah bit her lip, and let her know, "I don't know what he told you, and what he promised you, but that man is a joke. He only cares about one thing, power. He tried to get it through me, and when he couldn't, he's trying to get it through you now. He doesn't care about you. When he'll get what he wants, he'll dump you like an old sock, just like he did to me. And … well, if I can avoid you being hurt like I've been hurt, I'll feel much better."

Ana looked at the girl, not sure of what she could actually say, without sounding like a cold-hearted bitch. She knew that Christian had intentionally played with the girl's heart, just to get back at her father. But there was no way she could tell that to Suzannah. Especially the part where she and Christian had been together when he had let the young girl believe that he was falling for her.

"I don't think he will hurt me, Suzannah. But I appreciate you telling me this," Was all she found to say. Suzannah looked as if she was about to add something, before she shook her head, obviously judging Ana as someone weak, and probably heading to be in a bad relationship.

Ana gave her a few minutes head start, before exiting the bathroom herself, not sure if she should let Christian know about this girl encounter. If she was honest with herself, she was anxious about what his reaction could be. Not that she thought he would be angry at her, but that he could be completely cold regarding Suzannah's feelings and attempt to be nice to Ana. And though she knew that her future husband was someone cold to others, she didn't particularly enjoy seeing it first hand.

When she got back to the main room, Christian was deep in conversation with Ethan and her father, but she saw how his eyes swiftly flickered to her for a brief second. And though it warmed her up that he acknowledged her as soon as she entered the room, she was also relieved that he didn't come straight to her, like an overbearing boyfriend.

She went to the bar to get a glass of champagne, and a masculine voice startled her from behind, "You know _everyone_ is going to think that this relationship is arranged."

She half smiled, before turning to Jack, and letting him know, "But of course, you know better."

She had seen him coming earlier with some blond girl at his arm. Though their friendship never got back to what it used to be, they were still friends enough to speak to one another courteously when they would meet at such events, which was bound to happen, given the fact that they ran in the same circles of friends.

Jack glanced in Christian's direction, still involved in his own conversation with the eldest Kavanagh, and he let Ana know, "From an outsider point-of-view, Christian is the heir of your father's '_businesses_', and you are your father's daughter. Raymond would be keeping everything in the family with the two of you getting married. Look at it this way, there was more fuss when you were dating Paul or me, than when you are _engaged_ to Christian. You have to get used to people telling you this is a sham."

Ana furrowed her brows, not really having thought of it. With Paul, it had been different, he was a public figure, and he played with his public image. Jack was an eligible bachelor that had been on magazine's covers several times because of that title, so of course, people commented on her presence. But Christian was someone who lived and operated in the shadows, and naturally, she followed his step, not thinking even once how it appeared to the world.

Though she tried not to pay attention to it, she knew that her name or her face had appeared several times in the media. Whether it was for her love life, or for her charity work, or for simply being present at a fashion show.

"Well, let them gossip. I know the truth," She said with defiance, sipping on her champagne. Jack knowingly smiled, his eyes probably looking for his date as he joked,

"Well, I will leave you to that, and look for my date so I can go home in one piece. I wouldn't want your future husband to get the wrong idea of seeing us together, and me never waking up in the morning."

Ana opened big rounded eyes at that, clearly obfuscated. No matter Christian's flaws, he wouldn't go as low as to kill someone for just talking to her, and so she defended him, "_Christian would never try to kill you!_"

Jack snorted, and wisely said, before going, "Women in love can be so blind sometimes."

She let him go, though she did not agree with his last statement. Sure she loved Christian, but she didn't think she was blinded by love. She knew who Christian was, and who he wasn't, and he wasn't as bad as people seem to think he was. He was far from being an angel, but he wasn't the monster everyone made him be.

The gala went on, turning into something boring as they were getting deeper into the night, and Ana wished she could just go home, instead of having to host the party until it died. It was probably the thing she liked least about this whole socialite thing, not being able to leave at the high of an event.

Shortly after her father left, Jack came to tell her goodnight, and she could swear she felt Christian's gaze on her. But when she turned, all smiles on him, he was nowhere to be seen. instead, she saw Ryan, smirking at her as he stood by a wall. She walked to him, and as soon as she was at a hearing distance, he told her,

"If you're looking for Christian, I think he went to the bathroom. Even boring people who never drink need the loo from time to time."

She thanked him, ignoring the knowing wink he gave her and went to look for her fiancé. She found him in the men's room, and a quick flashback of their first Christmas came to her when he took her quick and rough against a bathroom sink. Christian looked her, his eyes lingering on her blue dress before he let her know,

"Have I ever told you how much I appreciate it when you wear blue?"

She beamed, glad that he liked this little thing she had for him. In all honesty, Christian only told her once that he liked her in blue, but he always showed his 'appreciation' whenever she wore the colour, which was why she always did her best to wear it rather often.

She walked to him, playing with the necklace that never left her neck, and countered with a sultry voice, "Have I ever told you how much I loved the bathroom sex we had the Christmas you gave me this?"

For a moment, Christian frowned, not giving Ana the reaction she was hoping out of him. He caressed her face with his thumb, looking deep in her eyes.

"I don't think that would be a good idea, today. I would be anything but fair to you."

She tiptoed herself to kiss his temple, before she whispered to him, "I don't mind, Christian. You know how I like it when you get rough."

As she said so, she let her fingers trail down to his trousers, so they could play with his bulge; and then, she watched Christian swallow hard before crashing his lips to hers. In her mind, there was no doubt that Christian was being reluctant to go on because he was jealous of Jack and of the fact that she and her ex had spent time together.

He had told her on a couple of occasions since their engagement that this was a side of him he didn't like because he had no leash over it. Their first time being intimate again had been about making her forget all about Jack instead of being all about them. Sure, every time after that had been very loving and sweet, but Christian still didn't like this emotion in him. And though she understood Christian, Ana had to admit that she didn't mind this side of him. It made him less … in control.

She nibbled on his earlobe, her hand trying to undo the belt, all the while hoping that Christian wouldn't reject her. But he did anything but. He hoisted her up so she would sit on the sink, and cupped her face before passionately kissing her.

She moaned against his lips, feeling that he was reaching for the hem of her dress, and before she could even register how anything had happened he was buried inside of her. He waited for a little, giving her time to adjust to his abnormally large cock; and then, started ramming inside her as if there were no tomorrow.

She bit her lips, trying to refrain herself for making too much noise. She knew that Christian liked it when she was vocal, but she couldn't decently scream her lungs out given their location. So she did the other thing she knew Christian liked most about their coitus, she locked eyes with him.

And just as he gazed deep into her eyes, he slowed down. What had started as a savage and almost animalistic moment was turning into something sweet and intimate, which only ended with Ana reaching her orgasm, swiftly followed by Christian who heaved in her hair how much he loved her.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

When she woke up the next day, Ana found the bed empty next to her, as usual. No matter how many time that would happen, she still couldn't understand how Christian managed to sleep so little. Still, she did not linger on it, and after a failed attempt to pet Bastille, she got ready to go to church.

She had been postponing going to see the priest for two weeks now, and she knew she was going to get a lecture for that. She never pictured herself as a hardcore religious person, but she still went to mess on a Sunday, and she still went to confessional when needed. In a way, she felt better confessing her sins that going to a shrink. Probably because a priest was supposed to care about her soul, and not her bank account.

On her way to the Church, she tried to understand why she was so religious when no one in her family was. Her father was anything but, and her Godmother was only involved because of her. The only person who seemed to understand her attraction to religion was her Uncle Eric, even though he himself was a non-believer. He used to take her to church and bring her theological books for her to understand better the mystic of the divine.

And the best thing he did for her, in her eyes, was that he opened her to the other religions as well, going as far as getting holy men to explain to her their own religion and kill the clichés one could have about their religion. Which left her a rather open person who never tried to put one religion above the others. In her opinion, they all had the same God, just different ways to apply and perceive the knowledge and commands given.

She was barely in the church that the priest welcomed her with open arms, though there was some reprimand in his tone, "It's been a long time since I've seen you, Anastasia."

She grimaced, knowing that she was in trouble just by the fact that he used her full name. She had been going at the same Church since she was eight, and Father Crowley was more than her spiritual guide, he was also her confidant.

"I've been busy," She apologised, though she knew that it wasn't excuse enough.

"I saw. Nothing should keep you too busy from God."

She could tell that he did not approve of her engagement, by his tone, and by the way, he looked at her ring. But she wasn't surprised. Father Crowley never approved of Christian, when she told him about him as they started dating.

Still, she wished she had been the one to tell the good father about the recent development of her love-life, and not some people magazine. Contrarily to Jack's prediction that no one noticed that Christian and Ana were now an item, several sleazy tabloids had a picture of her and Christian at the Gala for their front cover, announcing their engagement, and declaring to the world that she was no longer on the list of richest bachelorette of New York.

When she saw the pictures, her father reassured her, letting her know that he was the one who made sure that there was a photograph or two at her gala to take pictures of them and officialise their relationship to the world. And though she felt weird about her father thinking so deep into that whole thing, she liked this reality better than the one Jack had depicted for her.

"Well, if you already know, I can cut straight to the case, then. I would like to get married here."

Father Crowley gently shook his head and started walking throughout the church, forcing Ana to follow him, "You know what I'm going to say, Ana. I am a man of the Church, and the Church cannot condone this relationship you have with this man."

She had been expecting him to say that. Though Father Crowley was very much a man of his time on many things, there was still certain aspects of life he was harder on. For instance, he never chastised Ana for having had sex before marriage, but he never was shy to let her know that the life her father was leading was no good for her.

"He who never sinned cast the first stone," She replied, making the priest nod in accordance. They already had this conversation many times, and Ana never backed down from defending her father the best she could. And she would do the same with her husband to be.

"You want to get married here, but that is no news to me. What about your _fiancé_? Does _he_ want to get married here? I don't think I've ever seen him in a holy place," The Father said, to which Ana automatically replied,

"He came to the Vatican with me!"

The priest gave her a look as they kept on walking, getting closer to the candles. He took a deep breath, and let her know, "Ana … Why do you keep that kind of person in your entourage? I know you can't do a thing about your father, but getting married to Christian Grey is pushing it."

"I thought you were not supposed to judge," She retorted.

"I am supposed to look after my flock. When one of my sheep is going astray, mingling with the wolf, it is my duty to bring her to reason."

"But maybe the sheep is here to bring the wolf to reason, an show him a peace he had never known. Isn't the Bible teaching to open your door to everyone, especially those in need?"

"If people don't want your spiritual help, Ana …" Father Crowley trailed, implying that she was wasting time with Christian. She shook her head, and accused him,

"That's not very Christian of you."

"You are a good person, Ana. You have a good, giving and loving soul. I don't want to see it go to waste to the likes of _Christian Grey_."

"He's not that bad," She defended him because though Christian never judged her on being religious, he always was clear to her that he found no attraction in a higher power.

Father Crowley looked at her condescendingly, as he asked her, "How many lives has he taken since you've known him? _Though shall not kill_."

"How many lives has the Church taken over the centuries?"

"Ana … Christian Grey is just one man, not an institution."

"So he is more likely to stand astray than the Institution that is supposed to be holy and show the example. Mistakes are humans. Forgiveness is divine."

"You're too clever for my own good," The priest admitted, though it wasn't the first time he had told her that. This was probably why he liked this parishioner a bit more than the others, because, though she questioned many things, her faith never wavered.

"I just don't think that it's fair for you to judge what he does when the Church was built on so much blood. Nothing in this world is perfect, even less Men. I know he is flawed, I know where he stands when it comes to God, but I also know that despite everything he does, he has a good heart. He is a good man inside, and that's what's important."

"If he is that good of a man, why didn't you go to him in your time of need?" The good priest asked, looking straight into Ana's soul and making her look down, ashamed.

"Because … Christian wants to be a father more than anything. But I also know he would find a way to blame himself if he knew that, when we were separated, I lost his baby. There is no point for me to make him feel bad over something that is in the past, and cannot be changed."

The holy man did not say a word, probably seeing that Ana was lost in her thoughts, reminiscing how that week had been one of the worst for her. She remembered seeing the plus sign with Mia and crying herself to sleep in her friend's arms.

She remembered how Mia insisted that she should let her ex know, and how she knew that her friend was right. Christian ought to know that he was going to be a father. She remembered how she had decided to make an appointment with Mia, and how she would go to Christian afterwards, with th picture of the sonagram as proof of the life they created. But she mostly remembered how nothing happened as planned.

She woke up at the break of dawn, her bed bloody and her inside as if on fire. A part of her was glad that her father had been away at that time, she didn't need to answer questions she did not want to answer. Gail had called a doctor for her, who told her the obvious, and the maid kept her secret while Ana cried the loss of the life Christian had started in her.

If she was honest with herself, she had hoped that the baby would help reconcile them. But of course, all of this had been turned to dust. When she had come to Church to understand why she was punished, Father Crowley had surprised her, asking why she didn't go to Christian, instead of saying that it was all for the best.

"Ana?"

She startled back to the present, looking at the priest who knowingly smiled at her, "You will have plenty of other chances to have children. In the meantime, you have a wedding to prepare. Let the past be to the past."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, the second chapter is here, I know it took some time, but I did warn you. I had a lot to deal with recently on top of that, but here we are. Remember, the review section is open to all, but that doesn't mean you should attack someone for thinking differently than you. Oh, and I LOVE long reviews, so don't be shy. **

**~ Remember that in the first book, it had been said several times that Ana was religious, and going to church. I don't want you guys to start a debate on religion, or to get offended that your religion is portrayed in this story. Religion is part of life, and I am trying to get this story rather accurate. So, don't kill me. **

**~ Neither Suzannah or Jack are set to be the enemy. I hope it was clear enough in this chapter that their intentions were pure, and not twisted or something. ****Christian is seen differently by the rest of the world. Remember, we are now in Ana's eyes. But we can still grasp that she knows him better than anyone else. This is shown mostly with his parents when though he doesn't really show any emotions, she can tell when something changes in him.**

**~ I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless. Strangely enough, mine was the last one with Father Crowley (and yes, this is totally a Supernatural wink wink)**

💚** Now, about the reviews. Glad to see that you all support Bastille, even when he's being salty, and that you guys were all about Mia, even if she white lied, and didn't mention the awkward kiss between her and Christian. As for Ana and Jack, yes they had sex, but always protected, Christian is the only guy Ana had without protection**

💚**And now be ready, because a few new characters will be introduced next chapter…**

💚‼️💚** The updates of the week are **💚‼️💚

**\- Road Trippin, FSOG version (daily)**

**\- The Nanny, FSOG story (chap 11)**

**\- Second Chances, TMI story (chap 12)**

**\- Stargate, TMI one-shot (COMPLETE)**

**\- No Strings Attached, FSOG two-shot (part 1)**

**\- The Daddy story, TMI & FSOG version (chap 15)**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	72. Chapter 3: Love Me Like You Do

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚** I just want to say a massive thank you to all of you who followed/favourited/reviewed the story already. Be sure to keep them coming and to share the story with those you think will like it. **

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 3****: **** Love Me Like You Do ~ by Ellie Goulding (4,9K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana heard a noise that disturbed her sleep, but she didn't think much of it. She just glanced at the clock by the bedside, to see at what time Christian got home, before trying to fight a bit against slumber to wait for him to slip in bed next to her. But she still lost that battle and was awaken again when Christian got in bed almost an hour later.

She rolled, so he could take her in his arms, and smelled his shower soap, which made her wrinkle her nose as she let him know with a sleepy voice,

"You really are a neat freak."

Christian chuckled, holding her a bit closer to him, and asked, "What makes you say that?"

"You _always_ take a shower before coming to bed."

She felt him slightly tense, and no matter how subtle it was, it made any sort of sleepiness disappear from her brain. She looked up, even though it was dark and she couldn't see Christian and hesitated on asking what was wrong. But Christian let her know, without her having to ask anyway,

"I'm not being a neat freak, babe. I just … don't want to disrespect you. This is my way to leave what I do, outside of our bedroom, and never bring my worries and outside problems to our bed."

When Christian said those words, Ana wished that she hadn't spoken, and she had kept quiet. They were getting close to that invisible line that she never crossed with her father, and a part of her, still genuine and innocent was hoping that she would be able to dodge this topic the same way she had managed to do it all over those years with her Dad. But the more pragmatic side of her knew that Christian was not like her father, where her father would sugarcoat her and go in her direction to avoid talking about what made him the man he was, Christian always gave her an opening, waiting for her to take that tiny step toward him. And she knew that Christian, being Christian, would not start a family with her until they would have that fateful conversation and make things clear between them.

"Thank you. I appreciate your … thoughtfulness," She said with a small voice, before quickly changing the topic so Christian couldn't push the issue any further, "By the way, tomorrow night Kate and Elliott are eating with us. I proposed them to have dinner here because Kate is so curious about what your place looks like. You don't mind, do you?"

"Of course not. This is no longer just my place, remember."

Ana grinned, always loving it when Christian implied that they were one, and she continued, "I was supposed to cook, but I think I'll order some food from your Indian place. I don't know how good Kate got at cooking in Seattle, and I don't want her to make fun of me if she got better than me."

Though Christian didn't say anything, Ana was sure that he had just patronisingly smiled at her. She knew she was far from being the best cook, but no matter what, Christian never complained, and always ate whatever she made for him, even though he was a much better cook than she was.

"Oh, and I went shopping as well. I found that cute little thing for Bastille. You know those cat trees. Do you mind if I get him one?"

"Trying to bribe a cat, now?" He joked because she had been confiding in him how much it affected her that Bastille still ignored her. Even more when he would ostentatiously go to Christian to be petted, right in front of her, and would dash off as soon as she would try to touch him.

"Well, yeah! Can you blame me? Maybe I should even try that catnip cats are so addicted to," She thoughtfully said, determined to win back Bastille's sympathy.

"He's just a cat, babe. He'll get over it at some point."

Ana rolled her eyes, sure that Christian was not understanding how much Bastille held the grudge against her. Christian might say that he was just a cat, but Ana was sure of it, the animal didn't like that she disappeared from his routine for so long, and this was his way of showing it.

"Whilst shopping, I saw that Lauren is still _everywhere_! Any chance you can talk to Dad, and ask him to lose her up?"

"No."

This was not the answer Ana had been expecting. She hadn't been expecting Christian to agree with her straight away, but she hadn't been expecting such a determined and firm no either. She wiggled a bit in the bed, so she could face Christian, even if she couldn't really see him, and she asked,

"But … Isn't she kind of useless? You got me to take those shooting lessons for a reason. And it makes even less sense when I'm with you. I mean, isn't it ridiculous for you to be followed around like that? I know you can be … proud sometimes, and I don't think this is helping to have a woman following you around all the time."

There was a small silence, and Ana's eyes got used to the dark enough to see Christian slightly frowning, apparently lost in his world.

"Would you rather have a guy following you?"

"I'd rather have no one following me! And we were talking about you. Don't you feel weird having a girl following when you're with me?"

"In that case, Lauren is staying." She was about to argue, when he added, "_Especially_ when I'm around. She can look after you when I'm all but blinded by you."

Ana rolled her eyes once more, pouting as she could see that her crusade would not be as easy as she assumed. Christian eased the pout out of her lips with his thumb, explaining,

"Many people don't like me, Ana. Many people would do a lot of _unconventional _things to get me to bend their way. And you being my wife to be to the eyes of the world just gives them the best way to make me bend. That's why your father has been so protective all those years, and that's why I won't change his line of conduct on that. I am not risking it. I'd rather have you alive, but resenting me a little, than dead on the ground, killed by some idiotic punk."

"You're just being paranoid," She reasoned with a condescending tone because nothing ever happened to her or even Elena who has been with her father all her life long. Christian was seeing too much out of little things. Even her own family died of things that had nothing to do with what either he or her Dad were doing.

"Maybe, but I'm not risking it," He conceded, and Ana knew he was just being lenient to not make a scene.

That was something she had noticed with him, he did not like to argue over small and ridiculous things. So she understood that though this issue meant a lot to her, it wasn't something really important in Christian's eyes. He would have someone follow her like a helpless girl whether she liked it or not. He was just decent enough to let her know beforehand.

A small silence fell between them, until Christian broke it, holding her a bit closer to him, "Don't be mad, babe. I just don't want anything to happen to you."

Ana smiled as he kissed her forehead, and she assured him, "I'm not mad. I was just hoping to get Lauren off my back. I just got my hopes up for nothing."

"Maybe if you made friends with her, you would feel less weirded out by her being around you."

"Yeah, sure." Though she said those words, there was no motivation in her voice. She knew Lauren was not a bad person, to begin with, on the contrary, she was even sure that Lauren was actually one of those rare people who didn't report to her Dad every single little sing she did, but she couldn't get past the fact that she was a bodyguard, to begin with.

Christian must have felt her lack of enthusiasm toward that idea because he tilted her head up so he could see better the silhouette of her face before he bowed his head and gently caressed her lips with his. Those kisses he gave her were always the ones she liked the best. Sure she liked when he was being passionate, and even more when things would get a bit rough. But on the intimate side of things, those light kisses that held so much were one of the things that made her fall in love with him.

When he broke the kiss, she reached out to him, to prolong it, colliding her body to his, and feeling his lips spread into a smile when she did so. His hand languorously travelled down her body, all the way to the hem of her nightgown until his fingers met the skin of her thighs.

Before Christian could try to lead anything between them, she climbed on top him, never breaking their kiss and losing her own fingers in his hair, glad that he was not one of those men who kept their hair too short to grab.

Christian's hands found their way to her ass, holding tight to it, and making her inwardly smile. Christian had always been very clear that he liked that part of her body best, especially when they were starting to get intimate.

Their lovemaking was something sweet and slow that did not require any word being uttered

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

As she was waiting for Jessica, Ana sipped on her coffee, trying to figure out how she could get more people from her entourage to get more involved in her charity. They gave money without arguing and were rather generous about it, but they never took that step further to _actually_ help the less fortunate than them.

She knew that no socialite wanted to get involved with homeless, even less the ones her age, who only thought of clubbing and getting it on with the hottest guys/girls in town. She was not going to be a hypocrite and pretend that she was above all of that, she liked clubbing as much as the next girl, and Christian was more than easy on the eye; but she still thought that her luck in birth should be given back to those less lucky than her.

She was still lost in her thoughts, when Jessica walked to her, as bubbly as ever, with the briefcase that never left her side, and a man walking next to her.

Ana watched them come to her, surprised that Jessica never mentioned in three years they have been working together that she had a boyfriend. But then again, she never mentioned Christian to anyone but Kate.

Though Jessica was always very business-like with Ana, the brunette had to admit that the redhead had a certain charm to herself. She wasn't beautiful per se, in fact, though she would never say it out loud, Ana thought of her manager as rather plain, when it came to her features. She was a redhead, of average height, with scarlet hair and no distinctive feature to take her out of the crowd. And still, she could catch someone's eye. Maybe it was her quirkiness, or maybe it was that charismatic aura around her. Still, there was something about her that called attention, though it wasn't her physic.

The guy next to her, though, seemed to come straight out of a movie. His eyes were so blue that Ana could distinctively see them from a distance, his hair raven black, bringing even more attention to his eyes, and his skin was obviously sun-kissed.

Jessica brightly smiled at Ana, before sitting in front of the brunette, and introducing the stranger, "This is my brother James. He just came back from India and decided to not let me know until I was out of the door to meet you. Sorry about him, he's an obvious pain in my ass."

Ana dismissed the thing with a smile, though she couldn't help but feel a ping at the obvious banter between the two siblings. All her life, she had hoped to have that again, when she would get to find Mike, but those dreams had been shattered to the floor when Christian brought her the urn containing his ashes.

"Don't listen to her. I'm the best guy you'll ever meet. She just forgets because baby sisters are annoying like that," He joked, waving his hand in direction of his sister as if she was a nasty bug.

Jessica rolled her eyes, ignoring his gesture as she pointed, "Ana already found the best guy she'll ever meet." She showed the ring on the brunette's finger. "And I wouldn't mess with _that_ guy if I were you."

It was Ana's turn to roll her eyes. She knew that the world only perceived Christian as a criminal, but everyone always made him seem crueller and colder than he actually was. Christian was actually a really sweet man, who simply kept more to himself than other people usually did.

"I'm just saying that I'm awesome, and letting her know. Why do you always have to make it sound dirty?" James retorted, shaking his head condescendingly with a smile on the corner of his lips.

Ana laughed at that, a part of her getting even more excited for Kate to come home, just so she could witness that kind of banter more regularly.

"I'm actually eating Indian food tonight," She said, to make a little conversation and not be rude to Jessica's brother, going straight into business.

"I'm sure it's nothing compared to the real thing."

"Well, it is quite good. It's actually the only Indian food Christian eats. I'll give you the address if you want." He nodded, though she was sure he did simply out of politeness. "How long did you stay in India anyway?"

"A year. Teaching young girls about maths and English."

Ana opened widely her eyes with surprised delight, seeing that the charitable gene was something that obviously was common to the two siblings. Then, she turned to Jessica to let her know,

"I was actually thinking of doing something like that. I don't want to content myself with just helping here. I want to help as many people as possible."

Jessica nodded her approval, though Ana could tell that something was bothering her. She was about to ask, when her brother intervened, apparently reading well into his sister's feelings,

"You can't really start helping people you've never seen first hand. That is such a rich people way to think that money will solve everything. It helps, a lot, but as long as you haven't seen it first hand, you can't relate."

Ana stared at the man, startled to have basically been called a rich bitch by someone she barely knew; before she burst in laughter. It was so refreshing to have someone not sugarcoat what they would say to her and be simply blunt, that she couldn't help but laugh.

Jessica warily looked at her, not expecting that reaction, and clearly thinking that Ana would lose it against her brother. "Well, I guess I need to go to India."

James rose an eyebrow at that, holding back what he was thinking and Ana smirked, "I am not one of those rich people who can't live it rough. I lived in a hut whilst in Peru and liked it very much."

"Well, in that case, maybe I should take you there and show you around. When you start being serious about helping out abroad."

Ana broadly smiled, already picturing herself with Christian backpacking through India with James as their guide. From the little time they had just spent together, she was sure that she would find herself liking James as a very good friend, and there was no doubt in her mind that Christian would too.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

As soon as there was a knock on the door, Ana bounced to it, all too happy to see her best friend again. But the eager embrace she was ready to give the blonde was cut short as soon as she set her eyes on Kate. The young woman was showing a growing stomach.

For a second, Ana froze, not expecting to see her best friend pregnant, before she happily squealed and jumped in the blonde's arms.

"Why didn't you say so? I'm so happy for you guys!"

Kate giggled, giving Ana back her embrace as she explained, "To be honest, no one knows but Mom. We didn't even tell Elliott's Mom yet. We just thought we'd let people see the obvious."

Ana grinned, taking a step back to look at her glowing friend, before she winked at Elliott, "Finally those spermatozoids have decided to kick in and make me the best godmother in the world. I am the Godmother of course?"

Her two friends rolled their eyes, a teasing smile on both their lips. They followed her to the kitchen area, where the table was dressed for four, and she let them know of the whereabouts of her fiancé,

"Christian went to pick up the food. He shouldn't be long now. We were supposed to be drinking whilst waiting for him, but now…"

"Hey! I can still drink!" Elliott exclaimed, earning a dirty look from his wife, though he didn't seem to have a care in the world. On the contrary, he grinned as Ana poured him some whiskey and he claimed,

"Well, I have to drink for two, now, haven't I?"

Ana laughed, watching her other best friend doing her best to stop herself from smiling; and once everyone had a drink in front of them, Elliott and Kate explained how they thought one wonderful morning that she was pregnant, after being sick for two whole weeks, and how they had decided to come back here so Kate could be with family.

Christian arrived just when Ana was asking if they already knew the sex of the baby. Kate never got to answer, but Ana didn't care much at that point. She carefully studied Christian's reaction when his eyes landed on her best friend's obvious secret. But as usual, Christian kept his thoughts and emotions for himself. He didn't even comment on it, simply stating that Mrs Parvarti has been more generous than usual with their food.

Though she knew she shouldn't feel anxious about anything, Ana couldn't help but feel a knot in her stomach. Maybe seeing her friend already pregnant would put some ideas in Christian's mind, and make him more pressing as to when they would have children. And though she was happy to have her friend back, she wished all of the sudden that she had known beforehand, so she could have preempted this whole situation with Christian.

During dinner, Kate made a comment about Bastille and how she had been hoping to see him again, all grown up. Which made Ana retort with gritted teeth,

"Don't expect much. He's probably going to give you a hard time as well."

"Oh, what do you mean?"

"He's been ignoring ever since I've moved in," She complained to her friend, earring a snicker from Elliott and a smirk from Christian. Kate chuckled as well, though she tried to fight against it for a moment or two.

The rest of the evening was spent mostly talking about Kate and Elliott coming back to New York, and how they were going to settle down in Kate's old apartment. Kate made many plans for the upcoming weeks, most of them concerning Kate's older brother's wedding which would be a very private affair with only family members and very close friends.

When came time for dessert, Mia joined them, all happy to see her friend again. Unlike Ana, she didn't get to go and see her every once in a while for she was too focused on her studies. As soon as she saw Kate's prominent stomach, she squealed and hugged her friend, though she took the time to spare a glance at Ana. None of them said a word, but Ana knew what Mia wasn't saying. She didn't dare look at Christian once more and invested herself even more in her conversation with Elliott.

For a couple of hours, the five of them spent some good time together, making Ana feel like Kate and Elliott never left. Only Ethan was missing, and everything would be like good old times. And though it seemed that Christian blended in, it felt like he wasn't part of the group. More that he was part of the room.

When it came time to leave, Kate stayed behind for a little while, and Christian miraculously disappeared upstairs to give the girls some alone time. As soon that it was just the two of them, Kate asked,

"You happy, Ana?"

"Of course! Why would you even ask?"

Kate hesitated for a second, glancing at the stairs, before she let her friend know, "It's just that … Christian hasn't even smiled once. Or … I don't know, he seems so … _cold_."

"Christian has always been like that."

"Yes. But things are different now, aren't they? You'd think he would show that he cares for you."

"He does show it, but it's only something that he keeps … private. It's just how he is. He keeps his emotions and feelings just for the two of us."

Kate nodded, apparently satisfied with that answer before she smirked and teased, "Well, he does keep other parts of him just for the two of you."

Ana wiggled her eyebrows, the horny part of her hoping she would get a sneak peek of those other parts that Christian kept private for her. She glanced at the stairs, not surprised to see them empty, and she broached another topic,

"So when are we going to go maternity shopping?"

"I was thinking of tomorrow? It feels so good to be back and simply plan shopping with you in a whim."

"I know! I am so happy to have you back Kate," She happily exclaimed, taking her friend in her arms.

The two girls hugged, before saying their farewell until the next day, and Ana went to the kitchen space to clear the table, all the while wishing she was back home and Tessa would take care of it.

Christian was by her side barely a minute after Kate left, helping her with the cleaning in a much more efficient and rapid way. For a moment, none of them said a word, until Ana let her fiancé know,

"It was good seeing Kate again. I am so happy she is back and just a few doors down."

"I could tell," Was all Christian had to say, making Ana smile at him. No matter what others would say about how it never showed that Christian cared, she knew he did, because he always paid attention to the tiniest details about her.

She stopped with her cleaning and stared at Christian as he was washing the dishes. For a moment, she considered not saying anything and simply carrying on her merry way, but she knew it wasn't healthy. On the contrary, that zone of grey was the reason they broke up for two years.

"You didn't say anything about her being pregnant."

"Was I supposed to?"

"Well … didn't it make you feel impatient? I know how much you want to be a father."

Ana carefully looked at Christian, studying his face, his shoulders, anything that could give her any indication of what he was feeling at the moment. She watched him dry his hands before he turned to look deep in her eyes.

"I'm not going to rush you into having children, Ana. You gave me your terms, and we'll have your big summer wedding that will make Cinderella pale with envy before we talk about children. Seeing your friends didn't make me forget that."

"So you're not put off by having the wedding first?"

Christian slightly furrowed his brows, breathing deeply before taking her chin between his fingers and stating, "I already told you, babe. You mean the world to me. When will you understand?"

She smiled, happy beyond words. It was for moments like that that she was ready to endure everyone criticising her being with Christian. No one knew what Christian was really like. Not even her father. No one but her.

Kate just said so, Christian seemed cold to the world. And still, he was sweet to her when it was just the two of them. Still, he bore his heart to her when there was no witness. He trusted her with the raw side of him hat no one else would ever see.

She stood on her tiptoes and kissed the man she loved, conveying all the love she had for him in that kiss. She felt him smile against her lips before he held her closer to her. Their kiss was soft and tender, but before he could go any further, Christian broke it and rested his forehead against hers,

"I have to take care of something. Don't wait for me, tonight."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

It was the middle of the night when Ana woke up covered with sweat, screaming her lungs out. For a minute, she stayed sitting in her bed, trying to calm down her heart as she contemplated going to the doctor the next day. She has had night terrors for as long as she could remember, and she had been avoiding taking sleeping pills ever since Mike left, but lately, her night terrors had been so violent that the idea of sleeping pills was not so bad.

She stayed in bed, trying to get over her scare, and wishing Christian was there to calm her down like he already did several times. She knew he was curious as to why she had those night terrors, but he never pushed her to explain the reason behind them. It was just weird to admit that the sad little girl she was when she lost her mother never grew up and never managed to get over it.

After five long minutes, she got up, much more because of thirst than because of bravery, and she used the torch of her phone to lighten her way to the kitchen. She drank two glasses of cold water, watching blankly in front of her as she pondered if she should maybe simply wake up and go on her merry. It was past four already, after all.

She poured herself another glass of water when she heard a noise behind her making her snap the torch of her phone to localise the source of that unusual noise. She had expected to see Bastille but saw a man standing a few feet away from her, making her scream bloody murder as soon as the light showed his clothes covered with blood.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚 **So, the third chapter is out. Remember, the review section is open to all, but that doesn't mean you should attack someone for thinking differently than you. **

**~ Remember that in the first book, it had been said several times that Christian was perceived as cold by everyone. Kate is not trying to break them apart, she just wants to make sure her friend is happy and not going in a toxic relationship. Remember that Kate never saw Christian the way we saw him, no matter what Ana told her.**

**~ And remember that Jessica has been introduced in the Ana chapter of the previous chapter. **

**~ Christian is not different, just seen through Ana's eyes instead of his own, please remember that. **

**~ I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless. Mine was James's introduction, as well as Christian saying that Lauren is staying.**

💚** Now, about the reviews. Glad to see that you didn't start hating on Ana and her miscarriage. I know how much some of you don't like her. You are all rooting for her. And yes, Father Crowley will be a recurrent character, given the fact that this is an Ana's point-of-view story and that she is much more religious than Christian. And also, remember that Christian is seen as a criminal in he shadow of Raymond Morgenstern (the kingpin) and that Ana is seen as a sweet girl who cares about charity and trying to make the world a better place. They seem so different, that the ones who care for her will try to warn her sweet nature against him.**

💚‼️💚** The updates of the month are **💚‼️💚

**\- Road Trippin, FSOG version (daily)**

**\- The Nanny, FSOG story (chap 12)**

**\- Second Chances, TMI story (chap 13)**

**\- Forbidden Fruit, FSOG version (chap 3)**

**\- No Strings Attached, FSOG two-shot (part 2)**

**Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	73. Chapter 4: Stay

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚** I just want to say a massive thank you to all of you who followed/favourited/reviewed the story already. Be sure to keep them coming and to share the story with those you think will like it. **

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 4****: **** Stay ~ by Rihanna (4,8K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

For a long moment, Ana stared at Christian, avoiding looking at him in the eyes and completely hypnotised by the blood on his shirt. Though there were a few stains on his torso, it was mainly his sleeves that were covered; even his hands had their fair share of gore.

And finally, life seemed to come to her, though it only came out as a mouse squeak as she asked with a wavering voice, "What happened?"

During the two years that they had been together, she had never seen Christian in such a state. Even when he came back from the dead, he had been in better conditions than he was at that precise moment.

"It's not mine," He dismissed, taking off his shirt and using it to wipe the blood on his hands. "Why are you up so late? I told you not to wait for me."

She was about to let him know about her night terror when she realised that her seeing Christian with someone else's blood all over him meant that they were bound to have that conversation she had been delaying for so long. She swallowed back her tears, feeling a lump in her throat.

"Well, I should get back to bed now," She said, her voice stronger than she had expected. She turned her head and started walking to the stairs, but as soon as her foot was on the first step, Christian stopped her, his hand wrapped around her upper arm.

"Are you not going to ask where that blood comes from?"

"I'm tired. I want to go to bed."

Christian didn't let her go, and she could feel his strong gaze on her. For a while, she resisted, fighting against this discussion she so did not want to have, until she finally turned around, though she still did not meet up his eyes.

"Ana …" He said with a sweet voice, but she kept looking down. "This is who I am …" She remained silent, not saying a word and hoping that Christian wouldn't push it any further. "And you've known it all along. Not acknowledging it doesn't make it less true."

He waited for a little while, probably waiting for her to say something, but she simply looked down. She knew he was right, she had known all along who he was. If she was honest with herself, part of her crush as a teenager was probably due to that bad boy aura he had around him, to the fact that she knew he was dangerous. But suspecting something and knowing for a fact were two different things.

Moreover, saying out loud that Christian was a mobster was acknowledging the fact that her father was, and she had been so good at avoiding that topic all her life, she didn't want to see her father as anything else than her father. And she didn't want to see Christian as anything else but the sweet loving guy he was around her.

And yet, at that right moment, as he was shirtless, with traces of blood on his arms, she could see the criminal she refused to see all those years. That was probably why she wouldn't look at him in the eyes, she didn't want to see the mobster he was. The powerful, but cold and inflexible man that could easily take a life, without feeling an ounce of guilt. Despite the fact that she knew he had a good heart, she couldn't deny anymore what everyone had been warning her against, Christian was a man with a stained soul, no matter how much she loved him.

"I am not your father, Ana. I won't let yourself stay in that delusional world where you pretend not to know what I do. I can understand that you want no part in it, but I won't disrespect you by lying about who I am and what I do."

She nodded, not sure of what else she could do. She had known this conversation was coming since the day Christian proposed, and there was nothing she could really do or say on that matter. Christian wouldn't quit everything he was just for her, and a part of her didn't want him to anyway. When they had that talk in Italy, it made her realise that Christian liked being who he was, and she didn't want to take that away from him.

She just had to live with it. As Elena and Christian told her, this was not something that she was going to escape anyway. Her father was known worldwide to be a kingpin, this was bound to follow her for the rest of her life. Better with someone who knew it already and whom she loved from the bottom of her heart.

With a little heave, Christian closed the distance between them and kissed her forehead, making her lean against his chest, forgetting for a moment that he was sticky from another man's blood.

"I am going to take a shower. Come with me," He said, though it sounded more like a proposition than a declaration.

She silently followed him to the bathroom, but when the bright lights lit up, she broke down in tears. Maybe it was seeing the blood under better light, or maybe it was stepping into another room, and resetting her mind, or maybe it was because she had been suppressing that moment all her life.

Christian watched her cry, taking her in his arms and holding her against him in a soothing way; but before her tears could turn into uncontrollable sobs, she hiccuped and looked up, demanding,

"You are not my father, so explain to me _why_ you do this! Forget the sugarcoats, and don't elude like you always do. Tell me why you take so much pleasure in doing … _that_?"

Christian didn't even blink, simply bringing his hand to her face to erase the tears from her cheek with his thumb as he let her know,

"Because I can. Because that's what I'm good at. Because over time, I came to like it. Because the perks outweigh the downs."

"The perks? _What perks_? Staining your soul by claiming lives you had no business claiming?"

She knew she shouldn't have asked. If there was one thing Christian had always been with her, it was honest. No matter how many times he eluded when convenient, when she had asked for straight answers, Christian had always been raw with her, giving her the truth in its purest form. And this time was no different.

He took a minute step back, raising an eyebrow at her as he started stripping and reminded her of something crucial about him, "You know very well that I don't care about that. I am not a religious man."

"Still, there are no perks on being a … who you are."

"On being a mobster, you mean?_ That's_ who I am, Ana. Not saying the word won't change that."

He was now naked before her, and for a moment they stared at each other before he turned to switch on the water. Ana stood there not sure of what else she could say. She had always known that about Christian, or about her father. But she had let herself live in that sweet illusion that none of it was true.

She deeply breathed in through her nose, swallowing her tears as she contemplated the idea of letting Christian to his shower and simply going back to bed to cry in her pillow the loss of her innocence. That tiny thing that she had managed to keep for so long, and that Christian had just shattered without even batting an eye. But then again, as he just said, he was a mobster, this was who he was, so why should he feel bad about any of this?

Christian longly looked at her, love echoing in the grey of his eyes, before he gently caressed her cheek and let her know, "And you yourself enjoy those perks every day. Your charity, your lifestyle, your clothes, all of those are perks brought to you by who your father is."

As he said so, his fingers traced the outline of her satin nightgown, accentuating his words by pointing out the luxurious clothes she was wearing, before he stripped her as well. When she was as naked as he was, she strangely felt bolder. Probably because at this right instant, they were in such a raw moment of truth, both standing as equals, no matter how much Christian was doing all the talking and the reasoning.

"I wouldn't mind giving all of that up, Christian. If it meant you not having to—" She started defending herself, not liking how Christian was making her feel like she was simply shallow and materialistic. But Christian had a small smile, barely hiding his chuckle as he cut her off,

"Of course you would mind. You just say that, because you've never been at the wrong end of the food chain. You've never been at the bottom. You never had to beg or steal to eat, you never had to go to sleep, unsure of the next day, you never had to use the sky as your only rooftop.

Life is much harder than your Dad has made it be for you."

And though she knew she shouldn't, she couldn't help but have a disabused smile creep on her lips. She knew Christian was right. It seemed like such a romantic notion to live only from love, but the truth was just as he said, much harder than she ever experienced it.

Christian traced her lips with his thumb, muttering, "One of the perks."

She looked at him, confused and hoping that he would explain what he just said. He simply smiled, picking her up and putting her in the shower with him before kissing her with delicacy. She felt him tense as the hot water hit his body, making her appreciate the effort he was doing by having a hot shower with her.

She looked down, as the water washed away the blood Christian had on his hands, but though she knew this shower was for Christian's benefice, she felt that a part of her was washed as well. She felt like it was her innocence that was going in the drain as well. That innocence that she kept on holding on to, no matter what, ignoring all the signs and flaws of her father's life.

For a long time, the two of them stayed for a long time under the hot shower, with her in Christian's arms. And though she couldn't tell what had triggered it, she knew it was her turn to do something. Christian had been honest and straightforward with her, it was her turn to take a step toward him.

Silently, he reached for his loofa, and rubbed his bar soap on it, before lifting her arm to wash his body. Even though it was a truth she had been trying to run from for a long time, she didn't care. She loved Christian. She wouldn't be able to change him, even if she wanted to. She had always defended him when people started having gos at him, and knowing for a fact who he was wouldn't change that. She had made a choice when she had agreed to marry him, and even though she hadn't wanted to admit it at the time, she knew the consequences.

She rubbed the loofa all over his body, scrubbing a bit harder where blood had stained his skin, and once he was all cleaned, she let him know, "I still love you, Christian. No matter what. It doesn't change a thing. I still choose you."

He cupped her face with love and gentleness, looking straight in her eyes as he smiled at her. "I never doubted that."

Then, they left the shower and headed to bed where Ana fell asleep safely locked in her fiancé's arms.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

When she woke up the next day, for a moment, Ana forgot about what had happened the night before. She was just feeling gloomy. It took her a little while to figure out what could have put her in that mood before she remembered how she could no longer pretend knowing nothing of Christian's and her father's side activities.

With a deep sigh, she dismissed the thought and got ready to shop with her best friend, putting away her own feelings so she could focus on her friend and her unborn child. The two girls spent most of their day shopping, talking about trying to figure out a schedule so they could see each other as often as possible. Especially since for the first time in their lives, they were living in the same building.

Ana whined a bit to her friend that she still had to deal with Lauren and that Christian had been unbendable about that issue, and Kate talked a lot about her apprehensions concerning motherhood.

"Mom made it look so simple. I don't think I ever saw her struggle or doubt herself, and … I don't know, I feel like I'm going to mess this up big time. And I just have the one kid to take care off. How do other women do with many kids and a job, or a business like Mom did?"

"I'm sure you'll be fine, Kate," Ana assured her, feeling like her friend was stressing herself out by putting too much pressure on herself.

"Of course you're going to say that, I'm your best friend. You _have_ to say so."

"You know me. If I thought you'd suck at being a Mom, I'd tell you. I'm just reminding you that you thought that you would suck at being a wife, and now, Elliot loves you even more, if that's even possible. Don't stress yourself over all of this, it will give you wrinkles, and it's not good for my future Goddaughter."

Despite herself, Kate laughed, shaking her head dragging them into yet another boutique as she pointed out, "We don't even know the sex yet. Don't try to put words in my mouth that I never said."

Ana innocently grinned, following her friend to the maternity section of the boutique where the blonde picked up a book about pregnancies and flipped through it, explaining,

"To be honest, the more I read into it, the more I realise that it's _really_ not that easy."

"Of course it isn't. Otherwise, men would be able to procreate as well," Ana countered, making the two of them laugh with glee.

"I can't wait for you to be pregnant too. I hope it won't be long after your wedding, so our children can be close in age, just like us," Kate gushed, snapping the book close and brightly smiling at the brunette.

All Ana could do at that right moment was smile as well, and showing more excitement than she was feeling. She never actually told her friend about her miscarriage, due to the fact that they hadn't been living in the same States at the tragic moment.

And now that Kate was back, Ana couldn't see the point in scaring her pregnant best friend with tales of how she had a miscarriage coming out of nowhere and how she was still hurt by it when she thought about it again. Kate was already stressed enough as it was, and there was no good dwelling in the past anyway.

After they finished their shopping sessions (which took most of the day), they took a cab back to their building, but before even going out of the car, Ana had an epiphany and decided to go and see her father. She knew that simply spending some time with him would put her out of the gloomy state she woke up to and was bound to go back to if she went back to an empty flat.

She let Kate know of her plans and told the cab driver to take her to her father's place. On the way, she pondered on letting her father know that she was coming, but decided against it, settling to surprise him. As soon as she got in the mansion, she was met, by Gail who let her know that her father was waiting for her in the dining room, making her frown. Though she knew that Lauren had probably been tailing her, part of the deal was for Lauren to not blabber about where she was going and who she was meeting, so she could have a semblance of private life.

When she got to the dining room, she saw the table dressed for two, and her father warmly smiling at her, disregarding the newspaper he was reading. She walked up to him to greet him, and he let her know,

"I saw Christian for lunch, and he said that you would come and spend the night."

She did her best to keep her surprise to herself as she kissed her father's cheek, all the while wondering how Christian had known when even she didn't know she would. It had been a sudden decision, and Christian had known since lunch according to her father.

"He said that you were nostalgic of me," Raymond proudly added, visibly happy that his daughter has been missing him.

And just that simple statement and tone of voice, Ana realised the depth of Christian's love for her. He had known her well enough to know that she would go back to her father, even though he hadn't spoken to her of the day. And yet, he did not burst the bubble Ana had with Raymond. It was obvious that her father had no idea of what actually brought her back to his home.

Though Christian had made a point on telling her what he did for a living, he still gave her and her Dad the pretence of a life they had all their lives. The two of them had always been happy not talking about that aspect of Raymond's life, and Christian respected that.

Ana smiled at her father and sat in front of him as if nothing. She wondered out loud what Gail had cooked, but instead of answering, her father furrowed his brows and asked with concern,

"Anything you'd like to talk about?'

"No, no. Christian was right, I was just missing you, Dad," She assured him with her best convincing smile as Gail came in with a vegan moussaka.

"You know, you don't _have_ to wait until the wedding to move in. You can move in here tomorrow. You know that I won't mind."

Ana gently smiled at her father but kept herself from making any kind of promises. Though she knew that her father's invite came from the heart, she was not ready yet to give up the freedom she and Christian had. She wanted to enjoy as long as possible their time alone before her father or their kids would get in the way.

The two of them ate their dinner in rather peaceful silence, and whilst they finished their desserts, sipping on their digestive coffees, Raymond said as if nothing,

"Elena has been talking to me." He slid a jewellery box in Ana's direction, making her frown with interest. She never said anything to her Godmother about wanting a jewel of any kind, so she couldn't be more curious as to what was in the box.

She took it and opened it, only to reveal a beautifully jewelled hair-comb with sapphires ornamenting it, and wide enough to hold a big chunk of her hair up. She traced the design with her fingers, smiling at her Dad for the gesture, though she still wasn't sure what had initiated it; and he explained,

"Your mother was wearing it on our wedding day."

Ana immediately looked back at the jewel, seeing it even more treasurable now that she knew its origins, and she did her best to hold back her tears.

"Elena said that, though you're trying to hide it, you've been blue about the wedding because … well …" He cleared his throat a little, and continued, "I thought you'd appreciate having … a bit of her with you."

Without even thinking about it, she got up and rushed to her father, hugging him and silently thanking him for what he was doing. She knew how hard it must be for him, he never talked about her Mom. And still, he went digging in her possessions, just so he could give her something of her. Something old, something blue and something borrowed.

"I love you, Dad. Always have, always will."

"Love you too, sweetheart."

They kept their embrace for a little while longer before Ana went to her bedroom with her new treasured possession. After getting ready for bed, she looked online for bridal hairdos that would include and compliment the hair-comb, feeling once again so thankful toward her Godmother. More than once, Elena had intervened in her favour so Raymond would be more lenient. But this must have been the best of all those times.

After scrolling for a couple of hours on Pinterest, she yawned and rolled on her bed, ready to go to sleep, but slumber evaded her. She tried to force herself for what seemed to last forever until she admitted to herself that it was a lost cause. She knew what she was missing, and called her fiancé, just to hear his voice a little.

Christian picked up at the first ring, though she had expected him being busy.

"How did you know?" Was the first thing she asked.

"I know you, babe."

"I didn't even know myself. But thanks for not telling him about what we talked about yesterday night."

"I already told you, you will always come first. Even before your father"

Ana smiled, loving that, though he was saying that, it was his actions that meant more for her. With a little sigh, she admitted the reason for her call, "I wish I hadn't been that lazy, so I could be home with you right now."

"I'm not home, so you're not missing out on much," He let her know. She was about to ask if he was still working but decided against it. Though she could no longer pretend with him that she didn't know what he did, she would prefer having that sort of conversation face to face.

"Dad gave me a hair comb that belonged to mom, for the wedding. So I could have something old, blue and borrowed."

"You must be so happy."

"I am. and the piece is so pretty. It has sapphires and diamonds. I'm sure I can actually show it to you without jinxing us. It isn't part of the dress after all."

"In any case, I can wait for the wedding and be even more awed when I'll see you then," Christian announced, making Ana deeply blushed.

Sure Christian was not a very romantic guy, nor a guy who liked to talk about his feelings (or even show them), but when he had those small outbursts of genuine romance, she could tell it came from his heart.

And though she had just been complaining about wishing that Christian was with her, she was happy he wasn't witnessing her blushing like a schoolgirl.

"Dad also proposed for us to move in now," She lightly said, changing topics.

"And what do _you_ want?"

"To be honest, I don't want to live with him _now_. Kitchen sex will be out of order when we do so, and I happen to quite like it." She heard him chuckle to her joke, though they both knew that there was a lot of truth behind it.

"And loud sex as well. And I know how you like it when I'm vocal…" She trailed because she had noticed that the more noise she made when they were intimate, the more Christian let go of his natural control.

"I won't sell the place, babe. Even after we get married. We can still use it after moving in with your Dad," Christian reasoned, and she could hear him walk through a building. He was probably on his way home.

"Oh well. I still don't want to move in now. But I'll probably come and see Dad once in a while. I don't want him feeling alone, or like I've abandoned him. Maybe when you'll have … your late nights."

"I thought you didn't like sleeping alone," Christian argued, and she could swear he was smirking as he said so.

"It's a small sacrifice of one night once in a while."

"So maybe I should simply go back home then." And just as he said those words, someone knocked on Ana's door.

A wide smile spread on her lips and she jumped to open her bedroom door, all too happy to see her man on the other side of it, hanging up on his end of the phone. Without thinking, she threw herself at him, kissing him wildly as she let him know, "You're the sweetest."

She didn't know if Christian had been planning all along to come and see her, or if he made the decision whilst talking on the phone with her, she just appreciated that he came to her.

He kissed her longly, taking her breath away as she jumped in his arms and he took her to her bed. He delicately laid her down, leaving her lips for her neck, and she couldn't help but ask, "You're staying through the night, right?"

Christian upped himself on his elbows, staring deep into her eyes, before letting her know, "Last time I checked, I was no longer your closeted boyfriend, but your fiancé. Or did that change without my knowledge?"

She shook her head, a small smile on her lips, and he kissed her again, grinding against her burning core. She moaned against his lips, trying to get more friction, and he wickedly smiled at her,

"Now let's practice this silence sex you were talking about."

He kissed her back, making her feel so special at that right moment that she wanted it to never end. It was their first time in her house since they've been engaged. Their first time as a husband and wife to be, under her roof. And as he started undressing her, she stopped him, feeling bad about what she was about to say,

"Could you do something for me?"

"Anything," He said, before sucking the junction between her neck and shoulder, making it even harder to keep her thoughts straight.

"Can we … keep this place for our … wedding night?"

For a moment, Christian seemed confused, which surprised Ana. She couldn't recall the last time Christian had been startled in her presence. still, she explained, "I just want our first time here to be special, to be … after the wedding"

"So to make it clear, you want to keep the mansion as 'virgin territory'?" Though his face was straight, Ana could tell that he wanted to laugh at her. But no matter what, she didn't feel like it was that ridiculous of a demand. They would build their whole married life there, and she wanted to do it right. At least in this place.

"You do remember that we already popped that cherry a few years ago. The eve of your twenty-first birthday, in fact."

"Well … It wasn't official. _We_ weren't official back then, nor engaged. I just …"

Christian finally broke out of his mask and chuckled, before rolling on the side and pecking her lips as he gave her what she wanted,

"I get it, we'll wait."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, a new chapter is out there. Remember, the review section is open to all, but that doesn't mean you should attack someone for thinking differently than you. Oh, and I LOVE long reviews, so don't be shy. Short or long, give me your thoughts and expectations, haha**

💚 **So about the number of chapters, I really don't know. I have always been terrible at guessing those, so I can only tell you it will be shorter than the previous story.** **About Christian being at the door, yeah it was rather obvious to me. It was long due that they had this conversation and I do hope that you appreciate how they both did it.** **About the miscarriage, it will come back you know me, I won't go wasting your time about something that will have no incidence later in the story. ****I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless. Mine was Ana's and Christian's first conversation, heart to heart.**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	74. Chapter 5: Millésime

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚 **Some people asked about the length of this story, and I cannot tell you. I know it will be shorter than the others, but I am terrible at giving real length, so … SURPRISE, haha**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 5****: **** Millésime ~ by Pascal Obispo (3,5K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Raymond's PoV**

When Raymond woke up that morning, it was with a welcomed feeling of peace. As simple and small as it sounded, having Ana come back just to simply see him made his heart swell with happiness. Sure, he wasn't naive enough to think that she didn't seek some sort of comfort, or security into coming back in the familiar home, but he didn't feel like pushing his daughter in telling him what was bothering her.

It was obviously something that had to do with Christian. And Christian being himself never said what could have been upsetting her so much that he knew even before her that she would come and visit her father for the night.

This was something that, contrarily to Christian, Raymond was having some trouble to find a balance in. Christian never talked about Ana, unless it was necessary like he did to warn his mentor of the brunette's unknown wishes to see her father for the night; so he kept his relationship with her private. And though Raymond certainly didn't want to hear about the gruesome details of their affair, he still wanted to know about them. He wanted to make sure that Ana was happy with Christian, and not settling like she tried to do with Jack.

He never doubted that Ana had feelings stronger for Christian than she did for Jack, but something Elena had told him kept haunting the troubled father. What if Ana had unconsciously settled for Christian because she knew her father would approve of him? It was a secret to no one that Christian had a special place in his heart, and Ana knew it.

With a small shake of his head to clear his mind, Raymond got up, and after taking a shower went to the dining room to read the newspaper whilst waiting for breakfast. What he did not expect, was to find Christian already there, already reading the news whilst sipping on tea.

When Christian had warned Raymond that Ana would want to spend the night at the mansion, he never mentioned anything about dropping by himself, and though there was no proof that Christian had spent the night, Raymond could put his hand to the test that he did. No matter the different clothes, and the clean-shaven face, Raymond was sure that Christian had slept with Ana.

Still, he hid his surprise by making a joke as he poured himself some coffee, "You're not even married yet that you can't stay away from her even for one night."

Though Christian didn't retort anything to that, Raymond still saw the small smirk on his lips as he divided the newspapers, giving him the business and politics sections, probably the ones that he had already read.

Gail got to the dining room to ask Raymond what he wanted to eat, all the whilst looking warily at Christian. This was one thing Raymond was sure of, Gail would not be happy when Christian would move in. He made her uneasy even more than _he_ himself made her.

This was something that had been playing against Christian, and that Raymond was sure that Christian was not planning on changing. He was too stern and too cold for his own good. So much so, that he inspired fear to people who didn't know him, instead of trust.

As he started reading about the latest news, Raymond made small talks with Christian, with this thing that was on everyone's mind at the moment,

"I heard I was going to see you in a church in a near future."

"You will. Not that I really have a choice in the matter."

"You could always say no."

Though he did not say a word to that, Christian knowingly looked at Raymond before resuming his reading. The two of them were perfectly aware that, though Ana was reasonable and would probably settle for something else, none of them had the heart or the will to tell her no.

He let his eyes skim through the business's front page, slightly frustrated that, once again, Christian was keeping to a minimum any personal information. The two mobsters remained silence for a little while, both lost in their papers and what they were reading and were only interrupted when Gail arrived with food for Raymond.

He thanked her, folding his paper and looking at Christian as he asked, "Are you not eating?"

"I'm waiting for Ana."

Raymond nodded, starting on his food until his eyes caught upon what Christian was reading. On the front page was the face of Patrick Gladstone, a young lad who had joined their ranks not long ago, and who seemed to be wanted for questioning over a shooting.

"How come I haven't heard of that?" He imperiously inquired, not liking that Christian did not open the morning with that news, to begin with.

Christian barely looked up, apparently finishing what he was reading, before folding his own paper and sliding it to Raymond as he explained, "I'd rather keep the _business_ conversations to your office, or out of this house. But, don't worry, it's already been taken care of. The media is a bit behind on the matter."

"You'd rather keep business talks outside of this house? Christian, you do realise that you are going to come and live here."

"Exactly. And out of respect for Ana, I'd rather not bring the business here if I can avoid it. Surely you can understand that."

Raymond could say nothing on that. This was exactly what he had managed to do for years and years, doing his best to hide his dark world from his daughter's pure and innocent eyes. But … he never hid it from his wife. Carla had always known about who he was and what he did.

And this was a conversation that, though he knew it was necessary between the two young people, he dreaded the moment it would happen. He didn't want his daughter to look at him differently. Sure he knew his daughter had her doubts, she was far from being as ignorant as she pretended to be, but there was a difference between knowing something, and suspecting it.

Still, he never got to linger on the matter, or to ask Christian what were his plans about letting Ana know what he did since Ana popped in the dining room in her robe, all smiles for them. And though Raymond had seen his daughter smile millions of time, this was the one smile he never got to see, the one smile he knew was directed to Christian and not him, the one smile that let him know that, whether Christian had spent the night or not, Ana hadn't expected to see him at the breakfast table, and was obviously glad she did.

Ana kissed her father's cheek, before sitting next to Christian and pouring herself some coffee. As soon as she was done, Christian leaned in and kissed her, whispering something in her ear that made her eyes sparkle. And though Ana probably only saw it as a simple way to greet her, Raymond knew that Christian was conveying a message through his actions.

This was actually the first time that he was seeing the two of them in a private setting since their engagement. There had always been someone around them, or a public function to attend before. And the only other time he saw them together was when they had just gotten back from their weekend after their engagement, Ana had been surprised to see him, and acting awkward during his short visit.

But now that they were settled as a couple, and that it was known that they would be moving in with him, Christian was letting Raymond, and subtly Ana, know, that he would not change the way he treated Ana because of his presence. Though Ana probably didn't see it, Raymond knew that Christian was telling him that he was putting Ana's wellbeing and happiness before her father and his comfort.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Raymond's PoV**

Shortly after New Year's Eve, Ana became ill with the flu, forcing her to stay in bed. For a couple of days, Raymond resisted the urge to go and visit his daughter, taking Christian's word that she was taken care; but though he trusted his second in command, he still wanted to see his daughter.

He went to see her during an afternoon when he knew Christian would be busy and found her laying in their bed, cuddling with a ginger cat, her eyes puffy and red, just like her nose. When she saw him, she frowned, sitting in the bed and closing her laptop as she exclaimed,

"Why are you here Dad!? I don't want you to get my bug."

"Did you really think I wouldn't come and see you when you're ill, sweetheart?"

She shook her head, sniffling and wiping her nose as the cat stayed faithfully on her laps. Raymond had known for a while about the existence of the cat, but this was the first time he was actually seeing the animal, despite having come several times to the apartment over the years Christian had had the feline.

The cat's blue eyes pierced right through Raymond, never blinking and its black iris snakelike, and when Raymond tried to pet the animal as a friendly gesture, the cat hissed, its hair all risen and its claws out. Raymond retracted his hand and joked,

"Well, you don't need a guard dog. The cat is obviously doing a much better job."

Ana kindly smiled to the cat, gently caressing him to calm him down as she let her father know, "He just needs to get used to you. He's just started to be nice to me again. I think he could feel I was sick, and he wanted to make me feel better."

"It's just a cat, Ana."

"Animals have a sixth sense," She simply said, as if the matter was closed.

Raymond smiled at his daughter, his eyes carefully studying her sickly face. She did seem beaten down by the illness, but at least she wasn't wasting away like she usually did when she was sick. He had to say that he had been lucky enough in that department. Ana hadn't been a very sickly child whilst growing up, but every time a bug had managed to through her immune system, it had taken her down completely.

"How are you feeling, sweetheart? No bullshit."

"I'm doing better. Christian _loves_ being a nurse. He was all over my case for the past two days. I had to kick him out, he didn't want to leave me 'in my condition'. As if I were on my deathbed."

"You do look dreadful," He teased, making his daughter playfully grimace at him.

"Gee, thanks, Dad. I feel much better about myself now."

They both chuckled and Ana blew her nose once more. Her phone biped, indicating that she had a text, and she checked, before shaking her head and replying to whoever texted her.

"When I think I'm missing Kate's birthday because of some stupid cold."

"You can still celebrate later on. You just concentrate on getting better for now."

"I know. It's just that I had plans with friends and now they all have been postponed. I'm just glad this bug came after the holiday season. Imagine me having to sit down Christmas and New Year's Eve!" She exclaimed with indignation, making her father look amused at her scorn.

"I'm sure Kate understands why you can't be with her right now," He assured, though he knew it was useless, Ana knew that as well, she was just making small talks with him for the sake of it.

"Of course she does. None of us wants her to be sick whilst pregnant. I just had some plans with James, and now, I have to wait to get better."

Raymond held his tongue for a moment, keeping for himself his thoughts on that new person in his daughter's life. In all honesty, James seemed like a good lad, a bit utopian, just like Ana, thinking that they could actually change the world without getting their hands dirty, but a good person all in all.

Still, there was something that made him uneasy about the man. He couldn't tell if it was because he didn't know that guy well enough yet, or because he picked up Christian's obvious dislike in the man, but the feeling was still there.

Though Christian never said a bad word about James in front of Ana, or behind her back, Raymond could bet his life on the fact that Ana's fiancé did not like her latest friend. It was something subtle for everyone else, but obvious to Raymond who had learnt over the years to read behind Christian's mask. He had learned to decipher the man's rigidness, his smallest ticks or blinks, or the way his eyes flickered to Ana.

Raymond could tell that Christian was jealous, or he would have brought the matter to Ana and let her know about his dislike of James. He was jealous and trying to keep it to himself, for Ana's sake. After all, James had never trespassed any sort of line and always remained friendly with the brunette. But most importantly, Ana had no idea of Christian's feelings on that regard.

He pondered keeping his observations for himself, and let the couple be, but he still found himself saying to his daughter,

"You do spend a lot of time with James."

"Well, of course. In addition to being my friend, he's helping me build my new charity," Ana retorted the most naturally in the world. Raymond carefully thought of his next words, not wanting to create a conflict in his daughter's couple, where there were none.

"Some would say that it's not … healthy to spend so much time with —"

"Oh Dad, _please_! Don't make me have that kind of conversation with _you_. Christian and I are great together, and he knows that James is just a friend. I don't want to talk about what we say when you're not here," She cut him off, mortified, her face now as red as her nose and eyes.

Raymond held his hands up in defeat and changed the topic. Clearly, Ana knew where he had been trying to go, and judged that the conversation was futile.

"Father Crowley came by the house yesterday morning," He let her know, making her grimace as he obviously reminded her of something she had forgotten. "I told him that you were sick. He did ask for your address, but settled on you paying him a visit when you will get better."

"We were supposed to go over my schedule to see when we could do couple counselling over the next few months."

"Christian is going to do counselling?" Raymond asked with surprise, a smirk plastered on his lips. It always amazed him how compliant Christian could get in order to please Ana.

Ana glared at her father, pursing her lips and squinting her eyes, as she declared, "Don't mock. Father Crowley said it was important for us to be prepared, in order to not fail this marriage."

Raymond nodded, mostly to appease his daughter, not because he agreed with her words. He had always found the priest as a bit too preachy for his liking. He had met the man several times in his life since Ana was so keen into following a God that she had never met and who imposed her a faith that he did not agree with. In truth, more than once he had argued with Eric for helping her get in that state of mind.

Of course, Ana always defended her holy man, saying that it was in his job description to be preachy and that Father Crowley was there to make sure her soul remained intact. More than once, she had tried to convert her father and obviously failed. And this was one thing he was actually eager to see, Ana trying to convert Christian in her way of thinking about life, and _the afterlife_.

"But of course, you'll be here to help us stay strong, right?" Ana asked with a gentle smile. Raymond smiled back, perfectly aware that she was assuring him through her words that no matter what, she would still consider him as a part of her life. Even though Father Crowley would feed her head with notions of Heaven and Hell, even though she would get married to Christian, she would still hold him high in her heart.

And still, he was not sure what he thought of that. There was still this little squirm inside of him, making him feel uneasy when he thought if the future Ana wanted. This moment was as good as any to talk about it,

"Sweetheart, … you do know that you don't _have_ to move in with me when you get married, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"I know I told you on several occasions that I didn't want to see you leave, but that doesn't mean that you _have _to stay with me. Life happens, and every bird leaves its nest. I would understand you wanting your own little place with Christian and your family."

Ana fondly smiled to her father, making him feel for a moment that _he_ was the child and she was the parent. She opened her mouth to say something but sneezed loudly. So after blowing her nose for the umpteenth time, she let him know,

"I know that I don't have to stay with you, Dad. I just _want_ to. I want my children to grow up where I grew up, and I want them to be close to their grandparents, even more than I was to mine. And … I'm obviously not going to have that with Christian's parents, so you're the one who _has _to live with us."

Raymond fondly smiled to his daughter, a weight being lifted from his daughter. Ever since she had told him that she and Christian would come live with him, he had felt as if he had imposed that to her by the many times he had told her he would rather have her stay by his sides. But having her explain her reasons, made all his worry and guilt disappear.

Still, this was not the topic on which he bounced back, "I saw that Grace and Carrick Grey were on the guest list."

"Well …" She seemed hesitant to go further, before inhaling deeply, making her cough a bit, "Christian isn't really fond with the idea of reconnecting with his parents, but he understands why I want them at our wedding. It's just … complicated."

Raymond nodded, understanding what his daughter was not saying. She didn't want to talk about Christian and his relationship with his family when he wasn't there. Raymond doubted that Christian would ever form a new relationship with his parents, he was a man who held the grudge, and he had buried them long ago. But then again, he had seen Christian do things for Ana that he had never thought the young man would ever even consider.

Before they could talk any further about anything, Christian entered the room, showing no surprise in finding Raymond sitting by the brunette's sickbed, and going straight to his fiancée to kiss her forehead.

"You're going to catch my bug," Ana complained, though her grievance was completely dismissed by Christian who simply inquired,

"How are you feeling, babe?"

"Better. Dad gave me the best medication ever." Christian quirked an eyebrow up, briefly glancing at his mentor before refocussing his attention on Ana who mischievously explained, "A father's smile."

"I better go. I'll see you tomorrow morning, Christian," Raymond announced.

Christian nodded, his eyes quickly going back to Raymond to let him know that there were things he would like to discuss, and Raymond left the two lovebirds on their own, glad to have had that little heart to heart conversation with his daughter.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So**** about the conversation between Ana and Christian, remember that Christian said on more than one occasion that he knew that Ana knew, she just pretended otherwise. So it was just them being honest about it. It was never going to be a deal-breaker, for sure. **

**~ About Christian being sweet, well … that's what we saw in the first part. I am not rewriting the character, Christian is sweet when it comes to Ana. He just seems colder now, because well, we're not in his mind, haha**

**~ And I just want to give a shoutout to one of you who saw how 'confessional-like' the heart to heart conversation was, and how it was washing away their old life and accepting who they were and how they were true to one another now! **

**💚I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless.**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	75. Chapter 6: Tu Trouveras

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚 **So w****e are getting toward religious matters, and it is always a sensitive topic. I do not judge anyone, religious or not, but I have characters in this story who have particular opinions on a certain religion, and … well, I am telling it right now, don't get aggressive in the comments. Any offensive comment I am going to see attacking someone's religion or belief concerning this chapter will be automatically removed. This is a place of exchange and I don't want the negativity of the internet to come here! I am quite serious about that matter!**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 6****: **** Tu Trouveras ~ by Natasha St Pierre & Pascal Obispo (6,0K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

A couple of weeks after her illness, Ana visited Father Crowley with Christian, so they could talk about their upcoming marriage. And though Christian never said anything about coming to see the priest, Ana could tell that he was only doing it to humour her. She couldn't really tell what gave it away because Christian acted the same way he always acted when he had to socialise with other people, but there was something about him that told her that he would have rather be anywhere than in the Church at that moment.

For half an hour, Father Crowley spoke of how important it was in a couple to communicate (which was definitely a dig at her) and to not have any sort of secret to one's partner, and though she didn't say anything, Ana knew that the holy man was referring to Christian's unconventional life. Sure, Christian and she had that talk where he bore it all raw to her, and in fact, they actually talked about it from time to time. Nothing really gruesome, but still much more than she ever did with her father.

And still, she never confessed to Father Crowley that she knew for a fact what Christian did. Probably because she didn't want the priest to judge her husband to be even more than he already was. The good father had never approved of Ana's choice toward Christian, and he never tried to hide it. The only time he actually tried to push her toward him was when she lost their baby, telling her that this was something she should have gone through with Christian because he was just as implicated as her in that life that had been denied to her.

After insisting once again on the importance of transparency in a couple, Father Crowley lightly said that this was a topic that they would go further in details in another session, which earned a reaction from Christian. Ever since they had set foot in the office, Ana had seen Christian being his normal controlled self, and she wasn't really bothered by it, she was used with being the only one who got to see Christian's special and sweet side. She was used to him going through the motions and waiting for them to be alone to show any sort of emotions or feelings.

But this time, he rose a doubtful eyebrow at the holy man, and asked for explanations, "Excuse me?"

Father Crowley looked at him, not understanding Christian's surprise, and Ana witnessed the priest she had known all her life turn to red in a matter of seconds as Christian informed him, "I do not intend on coming to more of these. I have better things to do."

"Getting ready for a lifetime is not something you do in just an hour, Mr Grey," Father Crowley retorted, his tone full of judgement.

Ana grimaced, not really eager to have an argument starting between her fiancé and her priest. In all honesty, she had been expecting for the two of them to clash, but she had had the sweet hope that it would be a bit longer before it would start.

Still, Christian did not seem to mind as he retorted with a cheeky tone full of sarcasm, "I agree. Building a lifetime is something of every day that I fully intend to work on with _my wife_ and no one else."

Ana smiled to him, putting her hand in his before turning to the priest with a little of a scowl in her eyes. She knew that it was in his job description to be judgmental and preachy, but that didn't mean that he had to push her fiancé's buttons. Which was why she said,

"Christian is a busy person, and I understand that. There is no issue for me with the fact that he can't come to all the sessions."

Father Crowley nodded, understanding the subtle message that Ana was reminding him once again. Through and through, she had told the good father that she would stand by her man, no matter what, and she had just proved to the priest that she fully intended to keep her words on that. And though she did not glance in Christian's direction, she still knew that he understood that, though she understood that he wouldn't come to all the sessions, she still hoped he would clear his schedule from time to time to come once in a while

Father Crowley took it as his cue to back off and talked about the reason they were there. He briefly talked about the sanctity of marriage and the importance of fidelity, though Ana was left surprised that he didn't develop more on the matter. Then, he talked of what was expected of her as a wife, but once again, Ana thought that he could have lingered longer on the matter, and it made her wonder if, maybe the priest was trying to put everything he had wanted to say over his sessions into one, to be sure Christian would hear it from him.

But then, he started going over what would be expected of Christian, and Ana understood why he went so quickly over the other topics. It surprised Ana because Father Crowley had always been in touch with his time, but for a good hour, the priest talked about the importance of companionship and how the husband should make sure he could provide for his family before committing to it. But most importantly, Father Crowley explained how Christian should be a leader for his future family. An example for his children to follow, as well as a protector to his wife and kids.

And though he never said it clearly, it was clearly implied that he didn't think Christian qualified on those. Still, it didn't seem to faze Christian the least in the world. He was simply listening to the priest, a small mocking smirk on his lips.

"What do you have to say about that, Mister Grey? Do you think it is too much to expect from the head of the family?"

Christian rose an eyebrow as if daring the religious man to push him further, but after swiftly glancing at his fiancée, he simply said, "If I am here today, it is only out of respect for Ana. And it is for that same reason that I will keep my thoughts to myself on what you said."

"Very well. Out of respect for Ana as well, I will not tell her that she shouldn't marry you."

"_Father_!" Ana exclaimed.

They had already been a couple of times through this and each time she had stood on her position, letting her spiritual guide know that, though she understood his concern, she knew that Christian had her best interests at heart. She trusted Christian fully and wholeheartedly to take care of her and their family.

"I don't think you have been thinking this through enough, you are safe now, but what will happen when you will have children as well? They would be in unnecessary danger."

She swallowed hard, doing her best not to think of her miscarriage. She knew very well that Father Crowley hadn't mentioned children in order to make her feel bad or to bring back sad memories, but it still did. So she briefly glanced at her fiancé, hoping that Christian hadn't caught her sudden change of mood, but his eyes were solely on the priest, cold despite his unfazed attitude.

"Are you insinuating that I wouldn't be able to protect my own kids?" He asked though Ana could hear the dormant threat in his voice.

It was, in fact, the first time that she was seeing emotions out of Christian outside of their couple, and she wondered if it was because Father Crowley was getting on his nerves, or if it was because the topic of children had always been close to his heart. After all, she knew very well that Christian would always do his best to prevent his kids from living what he had to go through, just like her father did for her. Insinuating that he wouldn't be able to do so was more than wounding his ego as a man, it was as well as a future father.

"It's exactly what I'm saying," Father Crowley said, without an ounce of guilt for calling someone a bad parent before they even had the chance to prove otherwise. Christian smirked, a sadistic gleam sparkling his silver eyes as he retorted,

"I know that my kids will always be much safer around me than in this … _institution_. Especially if they're boys."

"_Christian_!"

She couldn't believe that he stood so low. Never he had said anything about her faith or the Church, no matter how much he read the news. She wasn't stupid and she wasn't going to pretend that she didn't know the many horrors that some men committed in sacred places, but she had always differentiated those men from her religion. They didn't represent all the Christians in the world, just like some terrorists didn't represent all the Muslims in the world. On the contrary.

Christian looked at her, and before he even said the words, she knew that he was sorry. And though he apologised, he knew he didn't apologise for his words, but more for the fact that he had hurt her by going after someone she cared for.

Then, he took her hand in his, and he turned to Father Crowley to let him know,

"Let's be honest here. It is obvious that you think very little of me, and that Ana can do so much better. But I don't care about your opinion. I don't care what you think of me, and I certainly don't care about your approval. All I care about is Ana.

I only came because she asked me to. She's the reason I am here, listening to you preaching about the importance of marriage and children when you, yourself, have never even gone close to that. But know that I care about what you're saying just as much as the fly that my cat ate this morning.

So do your pitch, and let's get on with this so I can go back to my life."

Ana squeezed his hand, appreciating his efforts. Sure, it didn't end up as she would have hoped, but it could have been worst. It could have ended up with Christian storming out of the church. At least now, she wouldn't feel so torn anymore.

She looked at her priest, hoping that he would take the olive branch Christian was giving him instead of staying on his positions. She wanted to officiate her wedding in this church, with that man who had been her guide all those years, but she felt that if Father Crowley pushed Christian too far, no matter how much he loved her, he would put his veto on seeing the man on their wedding day.

For a long minute, the priest did not say a word, his eyes hard on Christian who did not flinch or even blinked. But just as Ana was considering intervening in their testosterone match, Father Crowley took a long breath and held his hand to Christian,

"If you have somewhere else to be, you should go then. Ana and I can get that wedding ready together. We both know anyway that grooms have very little say in what is to happen for the big day."

Christian looked at the hand offered to him, but did not do a thing to shake it. So Ana squeezed his hand again and told him, "Just go, Christian. I'll let you know tonight what has been said."

He looked at her, and when he saw in her eyes that she genuinely didn't mind if he left, he did so, not without kissing her forehead with love. As soon as they were alone in the office, Ana whipped her head to the priest and accused,

"Aren't you supposed to make sure that we stay together until death do us part?"

"He loves you," Father Crowley said with a condescending tone. "That's the one thing I can't take away from him."

"I know that he loves me. I've been telling you for weeks now that he loves me."

"You have. But now, I saw it first hand. He loves you as much as your father loves you, if not even more."

Ana scrunched her nose, not liking hearing comparison between her father and Christian on that level. But she didn't linger on that, more concerned to know what made Father Crowley suddenly so sure that Christian loved her. Their exchanged had been anything but friendly, and Christian had been his cold and usual self, despite the fact that the priest had had the luck to get a few words out of him.

"Have you talked about his life with him?" He inquired, making her feel like she was suddenly in the confessional with her soul of the scale, ready to be judged.

"We did. Christian isn't one to beat around the bush."

"Good. This is something you should be honest about from the start," The priest approve, and for a brief second, Ana felt that maybe it wasn't such a bad day after all. Of course, that was until he added,

"Have you told him about … your miscarriage?"

She looked down in shame because she knew that she should have done so a long time ago, Father Crowley and Mia have been pushing her to do so, but she never had the bravery to do it.

"Why should I? It's in the past, now. Me telling him about it won't change a thing. I don't want him to feel bad for something he can literally do nothing about."

"Why should he feel bad? It's not his fault if you lost the baby, is it?" Father Crowley asked, immediate concern colouring his voice, and Ana hurried herself to reassure him,

"No, of course not. But … Christian is like that. He will feel bad for not being there because we were broken up at the time. And even though it's my fault that we weren't together anymore, Christian will find a way to blame himself. This is how much he loves me, Father. He takes everything on his shoulders, no matter how heavy the burden can be, just so he can make sure that I float through life."

"But is it healthy, Ana?"

"It's not much a matter of healthy or not. It's Christian. That's how he is with the people he cares for. He does it for his best friend, he does it with Mia, he even does it with my father. And I don't think he actually realises it. So all I can do is stay by his side and try to make the load a bit less heavy for him."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

A couple of weeks after that disastrous meeting between Father Crowley and Christian, Ana went to her weekly shooting lessons with Ryan. And though she hated to admit it, she actually liked those lessons. Much better than the ones of self-defence. At least, she didn't end up on the floor each and every single time.

She had always been grateful for her father to not go as crazy and overboard as he usually did, and not hire professionals to teach her how to defend herself with or without a weapon. He had always believed that street smart was more important and educational than book smart.

And she liked Ryan, in general. He never really treated her like a fragile little princess, but just like a human, not hesitating on making fun of her when she would make a fool out of herself, attempting to knock him down, and simply being raw with her, within the limits of professionalism.

In fact, Ryan was the only one out of Christian's friends who tried to make her feel good about her involvement with the man. She knew that Mia didn't hate her, but no matter the relationship between the two of them, Mia would always be first and foremost Christian's friend. And though Jose never said a word against her, she still felt awkward around him. She never managed to break that barrier that would take them to the next level.

Ryan, on the other hand, had already invited Christian and her several times to his place, principally because Christian was the Godfather of his son, Brian. Brian loved Ana. In fact, he always played with her much more than he played with Christian, which always made Ryan joke, saying that his son already had common sense and knew who to trust and who to mistrust.

As Ryan and she walked to their usual stand, Ana caught a glimpse of the familiar coppered hair of her fiancé, talking to a blonde a few stands away from Ryan and her. Christian's eyes immediately fell on her when her gaze lasted more than a second, and he fondly smiled, before walking the girl out.

"Who is she?" She asked Ryan, trying to be nonchalant about it, though her eyes dissected everything there was to see about this girl.

She was rather tall, probably taller than Mia, with short blonde hair that stopped by her neck and that she had styled in a pixie way. If Ana had to guess, she would have said that she was of mixed ascendant, Asian and Caucasian, her olive skin naturally glossy and glowing whilst her dark eyes beamed as Christian said something to her.

"It's just Gia," Ryan said, shrugging and oblivious of Ana's change of mood.

He gave her a gun and waited for her to put her headphones in before setting the target in place, not giving her any possibility to grill him about this girl she had never heard of before. She started shooting, surprising herself when she easily pictured that Gia girl instead of the target, and when she reached to reload her gun, a strong hand prevented her from doing so, kissing her neck by the same occasion.

She smiled to herself, seeing Ryan disappear with a single look from Christian, and she let herself fall into Christian's embrace as he removed her headphone and kept on kissing her neck,

"Have I ever told you that you're hot when you shoot?" He languorously said, his hands snaking their way to her breasts, after having made sure that she would put the gun down.

She smiled once again, closing her eyes and appreciating those nice sensations Christian was bringing to her. But before she could try to stop herself, she killed the nice mood Christian had set them on by asking,

"Who was that girl?"

"Just Gia," He let her know, not stopping his kisses the least in the world. Still, when he felt that she wasn't receptive he paused just enough to add further explanations all the while keeping her in his arms,

"She's just a girl I'm helping out."

A wave of shame and embarrassment flushed through Ana as she remembered how she had felt jealous of Mia when she had appeared in Christian's life and that she knew nothing about the girl. Christian was just helping girls get out of bad situations that she would never be able to relate to, and she was feeling jealous and insecure for no apparent reason.

She shook off the ugly feeling that had risen within her, and leaned into Christian's arms, welcoming his embarrassing and his unending kisses. She let him set the pace, though her eyes never closed, too worried that someone might come in and catch them in the middle of a compromising position. _What if her father decided to come at that right moment_?

"Relax, babe. Do you really think I'd risk anyone seeing you the way I'm about to see you?" He coaxed into her ear, before turning her and making her sit on the stand.

She sheepishly smiled, aware that his jealous side would always do its best to keep her naked self to himself, and she pulled him by his shirt so she could kiss him.

If he was surprised by her move, he didn't let it show, deepening their kiss and turning it into something passionate and tumultuous. He actually seemed in a hurry, which was something really rare from him. She had always known Christian to be collected and in control, even in bed.

But this time, he seemed wilder than usual, and when he broke their kiss and pecked his way to her earlobe, she understood why "I think you should come more often when I'm here. Seeing you shoot is definitely a turn-on."

"Maybe you shouldn't mess with me, then. Maybe I'm not so much of a good girl, after all …" She teased, earning a playful chuckle from Christian.

He didn't give her a chance to find anything else witty to add, attacking her lips and winding up the aim of her skirt, making her glad that she had the good idea in the morning to wear that piece of clothing.

Quickly, his fingers found their way to her sweet spot, making her moan of pleasure when he pinched it a little. She felt more than heard him growl in response to her wetness before he started playing music inside of her. Without any hesitation, she reached down, relieving him from his trousers and taking out his friendly monster, so she herself could play with it.

For a moment, they simply pleasured each other, taking delight in building the other up until it subtly became a game of who would give in first. Though none of them had said a word, given the fact that they had been kissing all along, Ana could tell that what had started as foreplay had quickly turned into a teasing game. And so she used the best weapon she had in her position.

In a jiffy, she scooched off the stand and knelt before Christian to take him in her mouth without giving him the possibility to try and stop her. She rarely actually gave him blowjobs, mostly because Christian was more a giver than a receiver. But also because he was so … _well developed_ as he would put it. Though she enjoyed giving her man pleasure, Ana had to admit that the pleasure she could feel of doing so was tainted by the discomfort that position gave to her mouth and her throat.

As soon as the monster cock was in her mouth, Christian's hand was in Ana's hair as he threw his head back and swore between his gritted teeth, "_Damn it_, Ana."

She inwardly smirked, and gave her best to the task, appreciating that she had managed to catch him off guard. She had noticed that, though Christian had no problem having a foul mouth with other people, he never swore in her presence, except the very rare times he let his emotions get the better of him.

She did her best to fit as much as possible in her mouth, using her hands on the rest of Christian's inconsiderable length, whilst Christian gently took control of the rhythm he wanted to have. She could tell he was fighting to not simply let go, his grunts and hisses proofs enough of his struggle, but she didn't want to see the tamed Christian. She wanted to see the wild Christian that would make her see stars several times in very few minutes.

And so, the very best she could, she swirled her tongue around the tip of his cock, gagging a little, but not really caring about it. Giving the monster he was, any girl would gag on him. And it gave her exactly what she wanted. For a microsecond, it seemed that Christian hesitated on what he would do before he ripped her away from him and sat her back up on the stand, growling in her hair as he brutally plunged in her,

"I am going to rip you apart."

She smiled of delight, hoping he would make good on his promise, and as soon as he started rocking her world, earring yelps from her at each thrust, she planted her nails in his back. She could feel him hitting her G-spot each and every time, and just as she was about to orgasm, he retrieved himself and turned her around.

"Who would have thought a sweet little girl like you could be so naughty?" He said, inserting his monstrous member with force and passion. She arched herself, relishing in Christian pulling her hair so her back could touch his chest.

He kept his thrusts hard and steady, and when his other hand came to pick her nipple, she couldn't help but let out, "_God, Christian!"_

It seemed to please him because he held her hair tighter in his hand, redoubling efforts in his in-and-out movements as he told her, "Come on, babe. Come with me. Scream my name as you come with me."

Which she did, screaming his name at the top of her lungs as he emptied his load inside of her and taking her to cloud nine, with his hand around her throat.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

After that very interesting afternoon during which Ana burned a lot of calories all the while setting Christian's wild side on fire, she went back a couple of times when she knew that her fiancé would be there. Of course, Ryan picked up on that and gave them the knowing eyes each time he left them alone, but all Ana could care about was that she had found a place where Christian wouldn't hesitate on being vocal with her after the wedding.

This was something that she was concerned about that and that she had shared with Mia on more than one occasion. _What would happen to their sexual relationship when they would move in with her father_? Sure, Christian had said that he had no intention of selling his place and that he wanted to keep it, but it felt weird to Ana to see it as their place to go to have sex. It would feel too much like going to the hotel.

She didn't think that Christian would treat her any differently, because Christian had always made a point on treating her exactly the same whether Raymond or not was with them. If anything, he would just keep his emotions in check longer, until they would be alone, and in her room. But she knew that moving in with her father meant that they wouldn't have any more spontaneous sex like the one they had just the night before on the couch.

But now that she had found this place, she was more than happy to see that she would still get to see the more local side of Christian.

Still, that was not yet a problem for another four months. At the present moment, she was holding yet another charity event, fundraising for the education of young girls throughout the world this time.

James was about to leave for six months to help build a school abroad, and she had decided that, even though she couldn't go because it would make her postpone her wedding, she could still help. She had already planned to go and visit James anyway, as soon as she would convince Christian to leave work for a whole week so they could help the less fortunate.

Still, even though the funds that they received had exceeded their expectations, Ana wasn't really happy with the evening she was having.

Christian had come with _Gia_.

She couldn't tell why, but she didn't like the girl, even though she had never met her. It wasn't like with Mia when it had only been her insecurities talking, this time it was her guts screaming at her not to trust the girl.

Gia was _always_ around Christian and even texted him in the middle of the night, despite the fact that she knew that he was engaged. And in fact, Ana had asked around, as if nothing, and she was sure of one thing, Gia was not an unfortunate girl like Mia had been. Neither Mia nor Elena had ever heard of her.

In fact, the couple of times Ana had gone to the shooting stand when Christian was there, Gia had been there, talking to her man as if Ana didn't exist. And now that it was a charity event for _her_, Ana couldn't help but resent Christian a little for bringing the girl.

She liked to think that she didn't mind Christian helping her out, but if he could do it on his own time, and not when she was trying to raise money to help people with real issues, she would have liked that better. Especially since she barely had the opportunity to spend time with her fiancé.

Though she had to admit, the thing that bothered her the most was the fact that she saw Christian smiling at the girl at some point. Sure it wasn't _her_ smile, but still, she had never seen Christian break out of his cold mask outside of their couple, and now, he was spending all of his time with that girl that he never even bothered presenting to her.

It was with that foul mood that she got back home with Christian. For a moment, she considered keeping it to herself and rationalising it later on. After all, she knew that Christian was hot and charismatic, but she shouldn't care because she also knew that he loved her.

But she couldn't shake that morbid image that had formed in her head of Gia all over her man. Which was why, as she was getting ready to bed, she asked her fiancé,

"How come _Gia_ is always around you?"

Christian looked at her as if it was the first time he was seeing her before walking to her and letting her know, "She's in the business."

Then he kissed her, caressing her cheek with his thumb and easing the frown off her face. Or at least attempting to do so.

"It's just … I … I'm just not comfortable with her around."

It was Christian's turn to frown with concern, a glimpse of protectiveness gleaming in his eyes, though Ana could tell it was in her favour. "Why? Has she said something to you?"

"No. Not at all. It's just … the way she looks at you. I think she's into you."

Christian's lips turned into a condescending smile as he shook his head and reassured her, kissing her forehead, "Don't be ridiculous."

She waited for a little, hoping that Christian would understand her concern and get rid of that annoying girl, but when it seemed that the matter was closed to Christian and that he was already walking to the bed as if nothing, she inquired,

"Are you going to get rid of her?"

"No. Why should I do that?" He retorted, surprised by her request. She shrugged, not expecting to have to explain what she felt was logical,

"If the roles were reversed, wouldn't you want me to get rid of the guy bothering you?

Christian stopped anything he was doing to longly stare at Ana, making her feel that whatever he was about to say, was something that would apply to both him and her, no matter the situation.

"I trust _you_, Ana. My feelings about another person around you are not relevant. The only thing I care about is you, your feelings for me, and my feelings for you. Nothing else, and _especially_ no one else. I love you, and that's it."

"I love you too … But I don't trust her."

Christian walked back the distance between them, cupping her face before saying with assurance, "I'm not asking you to. Just trust _me_."

.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.

**Ana's PoV**

The Monday following her confrontation with Christian, Ana was driving in the streets of New York thinking back of that night. Though they had both stayed on their position, Ana had to admit that Christian was right. Gia could try to do whatever she wanted, she trusted Christian to rebuff any attempt she could try on him. She knew that he loved her, and that should be sufficient.

Moreover, it resulted in a night of sweet lovemaking that made her smile just thinking about it. Christian had shown her again and again how much he loved her, and how much she was the only one he cared about.

She was on her way to meet Elena who wanted to present her to a seamstress that would be able to do last-minute touchups on her dress, or Mia's (given the fact that Mia would be fresh out of pregnancy for her wedding) when she was flashed by red and blue lights, making her pull over.

Her heart beat faster than a drum, wondering what she had done wrong to be pulled over by the police. She always made sure to abide by the law when driving, going as far as to leave her phone in her bag, so she wouldn't be tempted.

"Licence and registration," The officer demanded. She quickly gave the papers to the man, seeing from the corner of her eyes that Lauren was a few feet away, observing the scene with intensity.

"Did I do something wrong, Officer?" She asked, not sure if maybe she hadn't seen a stop sign or a red light.

"I'm going to ask you to come to the station with me," He simply said, making her pale.

"Am I under arrest?"

"No. Take it as … a courtesy."

She nodded, not sure of how she could refuse and she got out of the car. In the blink of an eye, Lauren was by her side, but before she could say anything, Ana gave her the keys of her little red car and asked her,

"Could you please bring my car back to my place, Lauren? I'll cab it home."

The girl seemed about to argue, and Ana cut her out again, "You can tell on me if you want. I am just going to nicely follow this officer of the law."

Then she went in the car, glad that she didn't have the shame to have to go in a regular police car. This one was a banalised car. The ride was rather fast, despite the deafening silence during which Ana still tried to understand what the police wanted with her.

Once at the station, the officer walked her to a room with a two-sided mirror. And on the other room, oblivious of her presence, she saw Christian, making her blood leave her face.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, I hope you liked this chapter. Don't forget to show your love, and to spread the love as well. Do recommend this story to anyone you think might be interested. **

💚**And we have yet another character introduced. I almost named her something else, because you guys have a preconceived idea of Gia, but I'm hoping you will manage to go past that.**

**💚What about Father Crowley? And Ana's position in all of this?**

💚**And what's up with Christian?**

**💚I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless.**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	76. Chapter 7: Je Te Promets

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚**On another note, I hesitated for the longest time between Ana's and Christian's point-of-view for this chapter, because … angst issues. But had I gone for Christian, you would have once again crusaded against Ana, so I decided to show her side on this chapter, you have a bit less angst then, haha**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 7****: **** Je Te Promets ~ by Johnny Halliday (5,6K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

For a long moment, Ana couldn't do anything but stare at her fiancé on the other side of that one-sided mirror, her heart beating faster and faster as she was trying to keep her face unreadable. Whatever Christian might have done to end up in such a place, she didn't want the police to use her reactions to put him deeper into the hole.

She waited to see if the officer would let her know under which charges Christian had been brought in, but when he remained silent, obviously waiting for her to say or do something, she asked,

"Why is my fiancé here? Is he under arrest?"

The police officer slightly squinted his eyes at her, as if judging her intelligence before he said with a patronising tone, "I think you know very well why he is here."

Finally, she tore her gaze away from the one-way mirror to look at the officer in the eyes, because she really had no idea of what Christian could have officially done to have been brought to the station.

He condescendingly smirked at her, making her feel like a child as he said, "Come on, Miss Steele. Don't go and pretend you don't know what your father and future husband do in the dark of the night. We both know that you are not as clueless as you pretend to be."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, officer," She bravely lied, hoping against all odds that this lie wouldn't come back and haunt her later in her life.

But as she did so, without even hesitating for a second, she realised with horror that she would do it all over again in a court of law. She wouldn't hesitate to lie in court if that meant getting Christian out of a bad situation.

The police officer seemed about to retort something, probably ready to push the issue and call her on her lie, when she cut him off, already thinking of calling Mia so she could help her out.

"What are the charges against him?"

"We're not sure yet."

Ana stopped her jaw from dropping, definitely set on calling Mia. sure, she already had a lawyer that she could call, but he was there to help with her charity works, and she didn't want to mix the two. And she was sure that Mia had always known about Christian and her father, so she wouldn't really have to explain the background of the situation to her. But then again, maybe Christian had already called her.

"Who did he call?"

"Oh, Miss Steele … You shouldn't believe everything you see in movies. It is written nowhere that you are _entitled_ to a phone call when you are arrested."

Ana looked back at the tainted glass, watching Christian who was still sitting in the same position, with the same nonchalant smirk on his face. In all honesty, it was a bit frightening to her to see how well Christian fitted in this scenario. He seemed too natural, too used to it, and she did not like it for one bit.

And of course, just as she was disliking how natural Christian looked sitting in the interrogation room of a police station, the officer crept behind her, and whispered dark words into her ear,

"Can you imagine, though? _This_ is the man you are going to marry. _This_ is the life he is going to put on you. You will always be in and out of jail, because your husband keeps on playing with the law, making his own and stepping over the line. What kind of life is that? What kind of example are you setting up for your kids?"

She remained silent, though the words affected her more than she cared to admit. How was she going to survive if Christian ever was arrested on solid grounds? She had always thought she could live with Christian's criminal side, because of the way he treated her in that regard. He had always respected her, doing his best to keep his professional life separate from their personal life. Even with her father, she could tell that Christian had put boundaries because she never saw them talk about anything else but personal issues, such as the wedding.

But she never really thought of the consequences outside of their bubble. What if Christian got arrested and sent to jail? Or worse, what if Christian got killed? How was she going to survive that? Did her mother have the same questions when she agreed to marry her father? What were the magic words that soothed her down?

"The officer that brought me here said that I wasn't under arrest," She placidly said, happy to hear that her voice was not betraying her tumultuous emotions.

"You're not."

"In that case, _I_'d like to make a phone call. Am I free to leave this room?"

"Of course."

She glanced one last time at her fiancé whose smirk was still plastered on his face, and she left the room, walking towards the lobby. She could feel the officer's eyes still on her, a satisfied smile on his face, making her swear to herself that she would work on her poker face. He obviously knew that he had shaken her, and was rejoicing in that fact.

As soon as she was out of his hearing range, she took her phone out and called Mia, though when the tonality echoed in the phone, she thought better of it and decided to take her phone call outside.

Mia answered at the third ring, all cheery, "Hey Ana, how are you doing?"

"Christian is at the police station," She blurted out, surprised in herself to not have broken down in tears saying those words out loud.

"_What_?"

"They said that he was under arrest, but that there were no charges. And they never gave him a phone call! How is that possible? What kind of policy is that? It is an abuse of power, isn't it?"

"Did they _specifically_ say that he was under arrest, Ana?" Mia asked, making Ana tick as her heartbeat sped up.

Who cared about which exact words they used, the end result was still that her fiancé was in an interrogation room, with no visible way of getting out of there. She breathed in deeply, doing her best to keep her anxiety and her tears in.

"They said that there were no charges."

"How about you? How did they come to get you there?"

"I'm not under arrest. They just asked to be to come along," She confessed, feeling like a child. It had been rather foolish of her to go without asking any questions. Maybe she should have taken Lauren with her.

"Oh, Ana. Never follow a cop without knowing what he wants from you. Some of them are just … not everyone is as nice as you, Ana."

She didn't say anything, feeling so naive and vulnerable at the moment. Still, a part of her was glad that she had followed that cop because now, she was able to help Christian out of his situation. Who knew, if she hadn't come, he might have had to spend the night in jail.

Mia seemed to have picked up on her distress, because she added with a tone full of compassion, "But that's not the point. Law can be tricky. You don't have to be arrested to be interrogated. Policemen play with the fine print of law just as much as lawyers do."

"Well, I don't care about the fine print! I just want to get my fiancé out of here! How do I that? Are you going to help me, Mia?"

"I'm not a lawyer, yet."

"_Who cares_?!" She shrieked on the phone, shocked that Mia was not in a cab already, on her way to help Christian out of this mess.

She knew how much Christian and Mia meant to each other, she knew that their relationship was strong, almost sibling-like, she knew that she had nothing to fear from Mia, that Christian loved _her_, but that Mia still held a special place in his heart, even though he never showed it. So she couldn't understand why Mia was fussing about technicalities when she knew that Christian would have already been there to help Mia out of any sort of situation.

"Everyone cares, Ana. I am not a lawyer and I am not family. If I do the slightest faux-pas, Christian will be the one paying the consequences. And though I know how Christian feels about that, I don't want to put him in that situation. I know someone that can help, let me send him your way. Just give me the address of the police station you're at."

Ana swallowed her tears once again, before letting Mia know of her location. Then she leaned against the wall of the building, hoping that she wouldn't have to wait too long for the lawyer. Twice her father tried to call, but she sent him straight to voicemail, not sure she wouldn't burst in tears if she heard the comforting voice of her Dad.

She also ignored the two cops that came and proposed her to wait inside with a cup of coffee. Maybe she was getting paranoid with the situation, but she didn't want to leave fingerprints anywhere. She knew that there would be no use for them, but still, she would rather not risk it.

The sun started to set behind the tall buildings as she conversed with Jessica via texts, letting her know that she would definitely be late at the charity gala that was arranged for the night, and asking her to take care of things until she got there. She was collecting money to open a girl school abroad, and she was feeling tacky to be late at her own charity event.

And of course, to top it all up, Kate and Elena kept trying to call her, probably worried that she never showed at the seamstress. She could text Kate, but she knew that it would lead to more questions than answers, and as long as everything was still a mystery, she didn't want to worry her pregnant friend.

Finally, after an hour of waiting, someone approached Ana, stretching his hand out and presenting himself, "Miss Steele I presume. Mia sent me. I am Joshua Jones, I am here to get Mister Grey out as soon as possible."

"Thank you," She said with a smile, shaking his hand as she kept for herself that he was anything but what she had been expecting.

He was much older than she thought he would be, probably because she had assumed that Mia would have sent one of her classmates. Joshua Jones was probably older than her father. But he emanated of that confidence Ana saw from lawyers on TV, so she could only hope he would be efficient. Maybe he could even be someone she would keep in touch to prevent that sort of situations of happening again.

She followed him inside the station and happily saw him demand to be brought to Christian. Mia sent someone that knew what he was doing. "Do you know the name of the officer that brought you in, Miss Steele?"

"He didn't say."

"And the one who questioned you?"

She shook her head, feeling stupid for not asking that simple thing that she felt was entitled to know. But as they were nearing the interrogation room, she saw the officer by the door, talking to another cop and pointed him out to Mr Jones. The lawyer scoffed as if he had been expecting it.

"That's the Chief of police. It's going to be easier than I thought.'

Just before entering the room, he turned to Ana and told her, "Give me five minutes."

True to his words, five minutes later he emerged with the Chief and Christian shortly behind him. She saw with relief that Christian was still the same, insolently smirking at the Chief even. But that was until his eyes fell on her. In barely a second, his face became cold and unreadable, though Ana still saw in his eyes the spark of fury that seeing her had started.

Christian looked at her from head to toe, before looking back at the Chief, making Ana's hair rise on her arms. She quickly went to her fiancé's side and slipped her hand in his, repressing simply throwing herself at him out of pure relief. She knew Christian wasn't really fond of public display of affection, and she wasn't going to embarrass him in the middle of a police station.

For a moment, it seemed that Christian was rooted on his feet until Ana nudged him a bit so they could leave that terrible place. Without a word, Christian followed her outside, keeping her hand in his. Joshua Jones advised Christian to keep him in his contact, praising himself for his efficiency, but Ana could tell that Christian wasn't that impressed and that he would use the lawyer as a last resort.

She was about to hail a cab so they could go home, when a car honked them from behind, revealing Ryan waiting for them. They climbed in, both in the back of the car as Ryan explained, "Mia sent me. She said you've been a naughty boy, again."

"Take us to the mansion," Was all Christian said, his tone cold as he blatantly ignored Ryan's taunt and took Ana's hand back in his.

"I have somewhere I need to be. Do you mind dropping me first at the apartment in that case?" She intervened, and she was the first surprised by the coldness of her tone.

But that didn't change her mind. She was already late to her event and she wouldn't let whatever Christian and her father were bound to talk about delay her even more. She felt Christian's gaze on her but refused to give in and look back at him, too afraid that as soon as she would look into his eyes she would break and be a mess to the gala.

There was a heavy silence for a good part of the drive, during which Ana kept looking through the window, refusing to look at Christian in the eyes. She knew it was selfish of her to keep her breakdown for a later moment, that Christian would happily soothe her down and quiet her worries as she would cry them away, but in the meantime, she had her charity to think about.

"Can I get your phone?" Christian asked Ryan when he understood that there was no point waiting for her to start any sort of conversation. He composed a number, and attacked the person as soon as they picked up,

"Why did get that old prune instead of you?"

She didn't need to be Einstein to know that he had called Mia, which made her slightly turn her head to look at Christian sideways. She was used to seeing his face cold and closed off, but at that right moment, Christian was scary. For the first time in her life, she was seeing first hand why everyone was afraid of him. And still, it did not scare her one bit, and still, she loved the man just the same.

Whatever Mia told him on the other end of the phone made him hold Ana's hand a bit tighter, as if he was afraid of losing her, before he roared,

"I don't care about any of that! If it comes between a tiny bit for her or something big for me, _you_ know what choice I'll make! _You_ know what I am willing to comply to, and what not! I trust _you_ and no one else! Next time, come, don't send me some old geezer!"

And on those words, he hung up, clearly pissed. Ryan swiftly glanced in the rearview mirror, his eyes on Ana instead of being on his friend, but she kept her mouth shut. Her tears were in her throat, and any word from her would make them shed.

"I'm guessing we're not following the usual protocol on this one, then?" Ryan ventured, his eyes back on the road, and Christian glanced at her before he coldly and firmly announced,

"No."

"Do you want me to back you up?"

Ana's heartbeat accelerated as she understood the hidden meaning of their words, and before she could stop herself, she snatched her hand away from Christian's, looking back at the traffic as they were getting closer to their apartment.

There was a small silence, before Christian said in a barely audible whisper, "Not tonight."

With her jaw clenched, Ana did her best to keep her tears in and was only too relieved when Ryan pulled over in front of their building. For a moment, she even contemplated the idea of getting ready at Kate's, just so she could avoid Christian and the questions he was bound to ask. After all, Christian had never been fond of sugarcoating her. He eluded, but he was always raw with her when it came to things that mattered to their couple.

But she didn't want to worry her friend, and she knew that Kate would have endless questions if she went to her place to get ready. So she climbed in the elevator with her fiancé, keeping her lips sealed, just like she did for the whole ride, and when he took a step towards her, everything in his posture indicating that he was about to take her in his arms, she stepped back.

She knew that all he wanted was to make her feel better, and she didn't doubt for a second that the comfort of his arms would bring her a sense of peace. But she also knew that she was seconds away from breaking down and that any sort of contact with Christian would be her undoing. She wished she didn't have the gala to think about, she wished she had time to process everything that had just happened.

"Babe, …" He called out to her, and she turned to him, with her best smile, though her eyes never met his,

"I'm glad you're alright, Christian. I just have this charity event I have to get to, in my mind."

Just as she gave her half-truth, the elevator doors opened, but she knew she hadn't fooled Christian. She knew he was about to grill her about how she felt about this whole situation when she was saved by her father who rushed to her as soon as they entered their apartment,

"Sweetheart, are you alright? Did they —"

"I'm okay, Dad. As I was just telling Christian, I just want to go to my charity, because it would be very tacky of me to organise the thing but not go. And I'm already late."

She kissed her father's cheek, surprised by how cheery she was all of a sudden. But it was probably because her father and she never really broached the topic of his side activities. And now she knew for sure that whatever Christian wanted to talk about, he would wait for her to come back, and respect her father's and her relationship that never went down that road.

So she went to the bathroom, leaving the two men together as she got ready for her event, forcing herself to smile convincingly in the mirror, so she would be able to do it later on, in the evening

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

After getting ready for her charity event, Ana had to argue with her father who was strongly opposing the idea of letting her go anywhere. To her surprise, Christian intervened in her favour, though she was sure that it meant that Lauren would be lurking somewhere in her shadows.

Still, once she was at the reception of the hotel where the gala happened, she got struck by a sudden illumination and booked a room for the night. She would be able to think everything through once the event would be over, and would have clear and concise thoughts when she would see Christian on the following day.

The gala went like a blur, though she was grateful for Jessica and James for taking over, without trying to pry as to why she had been late. She hadn't expected any less from Jessica, because the woman had always been good at separating private life and business, but she was also grateful to James who let her know that he was a shoulder she could rely on if she ever felt the need to.

In fact, for the majority of the gala, James had managed to take her mind off things. He was so enthusiastic about that school that they were about to build that Ana had no other choice than to share his excitement. He reminded her that what she was about to do for those girls was no different than what she did for the homeless people of New York. She was changing lives without caring or trying to take the credit of it, she did it just because it was the right thing to do.

It was only when she got in the room that she had booked for the night that all her worries came back to her. She hiccuped of the surprised after closing the door behind her, when she saw Christian sitting in an armchair, waiting for her, his eyes cold on her.

"What are you doing here?" She shrieked, resting a hand on her chest to calm her heart down.

Christian longly looked at her, his eyes staying a bit longer on her sateen golden dress before slowly going to her face and taking her own eyes prisoners as soon as their gazes met.

"I could ask you the same question."

She deeply exhaled, putting her clutch on the table as she asked, "Did you ask Lauren to rat on me?"

"No. I called the hotel to know when would your charity event would end, and the reception let me know that Miss Steele was staying for the night."

She did not bounce on that and watched as he got up from his chair and stalked to her. His steps were ominous, and she knew that anyone else would have had cowered at the sight, but she stood her grounds, knowing that she had nothing to fear from Christian. That was the one thing she was sure of at that precise moment.

"Are we not going to talk about what happened earlier? Is this going to be a repeat of what happened two years ago when I tried to open up to you, and you shut me down?"

If he had tried to hurt her, he wouldn't have done a better job. She knew that she had ended their relationship poorly a couple of years ago, and she knew that she had hurt him a lot doing so. But now, knowing that he was in the same state of mind as he had been a few years before was like a knife planted in her heart.

"Did that little show from that dirty cop put you off?" He asked, his voice demanding and pressing, making Ana step backwards as he kept walking to her. She paled, afraid to understand what he was insinuating,

"What do you mean?"

And finally, he stopped, looking at her whole face before hiding his emotions from her. Suddenly, she couldn't see her Christian anymore, just the mask he used with the rest of the world,

"Maybe that little stunt made you … rethink my proposal. Maybe you'd like to call off the wedding and put me behind you, but you don't know how to do it, so you hide in hotel rooms."

She didn't know what took over her. Maybe it was the exhaustion of that long terrible day, maybe it was the adrenaline of the earlier events, or maybe she was just angry at Christian for suggesting such a thing. She didn't know. All she knew was that, before she even realised it, she slapped Christian as hard as she could, the smack of her palm on his face resonating in the room.

They both stared at each other with shock, Ana being the first surprised for her act of violence before she blurted,

"Do you really think so little of me? Do you think that I'm that shallow and heartless that I'll run at the first obstacle? Do you think that I love you that little?! We are getting _married_, Christian! For better or worse! I know very well what worse means when it comes to us. But that doesn't mean that I can't be spooked about it! I am _human_, Christian. I _feel_ things! And unlike you, I actually allow myself to feel those emotions raw and as they come!"

Christian kept on looking at her, not saying a word, not even bringing his hand to his cheek like in movies. He just stared at her and let her rant.

"What if they actually had something on you? What if they actually put you in jail? I am going to be the one who will have to raise our children alone, with their father behind bars. I will be the one who will have to explain to them that, though right and wrong are already defined, their father is still a good man, despite his wrongs. I will be the one who will have to see her husband through bars." Her voice broke at the last part and he took her in his arms, sweetly whispering in her ear, at a loss of words,

"Babe …"

That one simple word was enough to break any control she had left of herself. She burst into tears and sought refuge in her lover's arms as she confessed,

"I'm just scared that I won't be strong enough. I am beyond terrified that you will try to go after the Chief and give them a valid reason to arrest you. I am _so _scared, Christian."

"You have no reason to be," He assured her, lifting her chin up so she could see the sincerity in his eyes. But of course, she had a strong case behind her,

"_You were held in detention in a police station just a few hours ago_!"

Christian repressed a chuckle, erasing her tears with his thumbs as he let her know, "Babe that happens to me every couple of months. They bring me in for whatever pretence of the moment, they try to cook me up for a few hours, and I'm out before the day is over. They've never been able to arrest me on real charges, I never gave them the opportunity to.

Every now and then, they try to find a new inventive way to crack me, and today, for the first time of my life, I feared that they might have done so. If you had left me because of them, I can't say that my actions afterwards would have been as thought-of as they usually are."

Instead of reassuring Ana, those words made her cry even more as she got out of Christian's embrace, not believing her ears,

"How can you think so low of me?" Her cries were ugly, but she couldn't care less. She couldn't believe that Christian had so little faith in her love for him. "I love you. I've told you countless times. How can you think that I would leave —"

"And how can you think that they would catch me? Don't you think that now that I have you and our family to think of, I am even more careful about what I do?"

She had to give him that, Christian loved his idea of a family too much to endanger it. He would do anything to protect it, no matter the cost. He took her face between his hands, looking at her with love and adoration.

"Babe … Ana … _You_ are the most important thing in my life. Don't think for even _a second_ that I don't think of you when I make life-changing decisions."

She nodded, sniffling and earning a satisfied smile from her fiancé. Christian loved her. She knew that. And he would always do anything to keep her safe. Which meant he would do anything to keep out of jail. After all, he wouldn't be able to protect her if he was in a government-funded vacation.

"I'm sorry, Ana. I'm sorry they used you. I'm sorry you got so scared. I'm sorry I made you cry."

And on those words, he kissed her, colliding his body to hers. She let herself fall into the sweetness of that kiss, trying to engrave in her memory that moment before clawing herself to Christian.

Gently, he took her in his arms and laid her on the bed, his eyes ravaging her body, though this time, it was with a heated hunger instead of a freezing coldness. She felt herself shiver when he delicately slipped her out of the dress away, and she closed her eyes as he kissed her with passion.

"I love you, Christian," she whispered, out of breath after they broke there to kiss, and he slipped a finger inside of her as he let her know,

"Don't ever scare me like that, babe. I can't bear the thought of losing you."

She moaned, biting her tongue as Christian played music inside of her. "I'm not going anywhere, Christian. I'm here, I'm yours."

She had expected him to take her right away, but he dipped his head between her legs and feasted on her, making her scream out his name as he brought her to cloud nine. His tongue seemed to be everywhere, playing with her most intimate spot and bringing her such pleasure that she hoped that the walls were soundproof.

After she reached her climax, she watched him remove his shirt, but he kept his trousers on as he savagely kissed her, his fingers had found their way back to her core and ripping groans of luxurious delectations. It was only when he still didn't try to take her, even though he had brought her two orgasms that Ana understood what Christian was doing. She moaned out his name, earning a knowing smirk from him, and he told her,

"Say it, babe. Or I won't stop here."

A part of her toyed with the idea of keeping her mouth shut, just to see how long Christian could resist, but she thought better of it. Maybe she should be the one to make Christian beg for her.

She tried to roll them over so she would be on top, but Christian only smirked at her, securing her against the mattress, "No matter how much I love feeling your mouth on my cock, this is not what I want from it, now. Just say it, babe."

"Make me …" She challenged, earning a victorious smirk from Christian.

He reached for his trousers and thrust in her without her having to ask for it before he started mercilessly pounding in her. But every time she was nearing her climax, he stopped and changed position, only to work her up even more. The more she refused to beg, the more it was building tension between the two of them.

Until the build-up started being too much and she found herself saying her lover's name in a needy voice, taking his face in hers,

"Christian …"

"I'm right here, I'm with you, babe. Just look at me."

He looked deep into her soul, making her explode beneath him, screaming her lungs out as he kept on shooting inside of her before he collapsed on top of her, out of breath. The two of them remained silent, as Christian lovingly removed the sticky hair from Ana's face, and he told her with adoration,

"I love you, Ana."

"I love you too, Christian. For better or worse."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, it was just a false alarm. But it made Ana open up about some of her insecurities. And next chapter will have a small time jump (shortly before the wedding), with consequences of that fateful evening … What do you think it is?**

💚**And don't worry, Gia will become more important to the story, just like Mia did in the previous story.**

💚‼️💚**And I do not condone violence on a spouse! It's not because Ana slapped Christian that it makes it okay! This is a work of fiction, not a guideline! It is never okay to hit your partner, man or woman!**💚‼️💚

**💚I am still curious about what was your favourite part, nonetheless.**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	77. Chapter 8: Love Fool

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚**So f****irst, I wanted Raymond's, because it was good for the rest of the story, but we were losing on the sweetness of the reveal, then I wanted Christian because … obvious reasons and I settled for Ana, because well, this is her story. It's not because I like writing as Christian that it means I should, haha.**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 8****: **** Love Fool ~ by The Cardigans (2,9K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

It was two days before the wedding, and Ana was buzzing with excitement. She couldn't believe that in less than three days, she would be _Mrs_ Anastasia Christian Steele. A few weeks ago, when she had made the comment to Christian that she couldn't wait to share his name, he told her that he would rather perpetuate her name than his. He didn't have to explain why, she understood that he was not eager to give his parents' name to his children, and she didn't really mind either way. She never really lingered on the importance of a name, but after Christian had mentioned it, she was glad that her father's name wouldn't go with him.

In truth, Ana was really surprised and thrilled that Christian was invested in their wedding. She had expected him to be like Elliott and simply agree with everything she would say, showing up when he was needed and going with the flow. But Christian had been there for every decision concerning their wedding, except when it came to the dress. He helped pick the place for the venue, what kind of cake they should have, he gave his opinion on which flowers he thought would go best with her complexion. And most importantly, he insisted on picking their honeymoon destination.

To this date, she still didn't know where they were going. All she knew was that Christian told her to pack for hot temperatures. She had tried to get the information out of Mia or Jose, but they had no more clues than she did. But at least, she had to admit that her relationship with Jose had evolved in something more than the cold shoulder he had given her for several months.

Sure, they were still far from being best buddies, but they had a sort of relationship. It was probably due to the fact that Jose had married Ethan a few months ago, and therefore spent more time with her since Ethan was just as excited as her about his sister's pregnancy.

When Kate had given birth just a month ago to a healthy baby girl, Ethan had been even more enthusiast than Ana. Ever since he had been all over his baby niece, sometimes even stealing the quality time Kate could have with her daughter, just to be with her. And since Ana was almost as crazy about her Goddaughter, she had developed a relationship with Jose.

Strangely enough, none of them ever talked about Christian to one another. They mostly talked about baby Ivy and Mia. Though Mia never said anything to Ana, Ana could still see that her friend and the married couple was growing closer and closer. They even went on holidays together, which Ana had found weird because Mia had just been a third wheel. More often than not, she would find either Mia at Jose's and Ethan's, or the boys at Mia's. But she never really lingered on that, because she felt like she was reading too much into a simple situation of friendship born out of hardships.

With a little shake of her head, she came back to the present moment, picking in the casserole what Gail had cooked for Christian and her. Christian and her father were supposed to join her for lunch, though she wasn't expecting her father until dessert since he had gone to Tokyo during the past week to settle down some business.

She had dismissed Gail for the afternoon, wanting to have Christian for herself for a little while before her father would get home. After all, this would probably be the last time she would see Christian as a maiden before marrying him since she had insisted to follow the tradition to not see him for the twenty-four hours before the wedding.

She had actually been surprised how little Christian had complained about her whims of being as traditional as possible for this wedding. He actually came back a couple of times to the couple sessions Father Crowley had planned for them, though it seemed that the two men had a non-verbal agreement to not talk about their resentment for the other. Christian had also agreed on the location, and the guests list, going as far as inviting his parents to the ceremony _and_ the venue, though he refused to have them sitting at the table of honour.

"That smells nice," A male voice echoed from behind her, making her jump a little.

She turned to look at her fiancé, brightly smiling at him as she guiltily closed the pot, but Christian only showed concern when their eyes met.

"How are you doing?"

"I told you not to worry about it," She admonished, shaking her head a little as he closed the gap between them and lovingly took her face in his hands.

She hadn't been feeling so good for a few days, which had Christian worked up on her case as if she was on her death bed. She only agreed to go to the doctor to get him off her back, and at the condition that he would leave her alone. Of course, she hadn't been expecting the news the doctor had for her.

"What did the doctor say?" He insisted, making her roll her eyes. She loved Christian, and she loved that he cared, but sometimes, he was even worse than her Dad.

"He said that you worry too much and that to make it up to me, you should tell me where we're going to spend our honeymoon."

Christian chuckled, kissing her nose and stepping away from her, though he did not give her the answer that she wanted. She had always loved surprises, but Christian was so good at keeping secrets that it made her even more curious than usual, and she wanted to crack the secret before getting there.

"If I tell you now, I won't get _my_ present, then," Christian retorted, following her into the dining room whilst the sauce finished simmering.

"_You said you didn't want a present_!" She shrieked in outrage.

For months she had asked him what would make him happy to get as a husband from his wife, and for months he had assured her that he wanted nothing. And though she tried to find something that could surprise him, she never found anything, which annoyed her slightly because she had always flattered herself of being the perfect gift finder.

"I said I already had what I wanted. And _that_ particular present I am thinking of, you can't wrap it up. You can only give it to me when you'll see the surprise for the first time."

She repressed herself from blushing and busied herself looking for the cutleries in the drawer so she could dress the table for lunch. Every time Christian was sweet and open like that with her, it was a reminder to her that she was actually the only person to ever see that side of her fiancé. People didn't understand why she loved him, because rare were the people who were even aware that this side of Christian existed, but she knew no one but her ever got to see it, and it always made her feel special.

She smiled, displaying the knives and forks on the table as she lightly said as if nothing, "Fair enough. I just hope that there will be available doctors where we're going."

"Why would we need doctors? I thought you said I worried too much?" The concern was clear on his voice, and she didn't need to turn to look at him and see it on his face as well.

"It is nothing, Christian. You _do_ worry too much. I just think it's always good to have a doctor around. Especially when you're expecting," She explained, keeping her tone light, even though she had stopped what she was doing and was looking at her man intensely now.

Christian froze, two glasses in his hands as his eyes searched in her confirmation of what her mouth had just said. She gently smiled, and added,

"I just think that you're not from this planet. Because your monster cock produces super-sperm that goes through the pill. According to the doctor, super-sperm stroke on the day of your … 'visit' at the police station."

"And you're alright with having a baby _now_?" He asked, searching deep into her eyes and preventing her from lying if she had wanted to. She knew he was referring to the fact that she had clearly stated that she wanted to be married before starting children, but they were about to get married in literally two days.

She nodded, her smile still on, and before she knew it, she was spinning in his arms. She giggled, happy beyond words, and when Christian put her down, she cupped his face, seeing all his love for her shinning in his glistening eyes. For a second, she was taken aback. It wasn't the first time she was seeing Christian on the verge to tears, but the other time had been on his birthday, and though she never really knew what caused it, he had been in anguish that time.

This time, he was radiating with joy, love and happiness, and so, all she could do was gently caress his face and let him know, "I love you, Christian."

For a second, he seemed lost in the love of her eyes, before he muttered between his teeth, "Fuck Raymond," and attacked her lips with love and passion.

With as much fervour if not more, she kissed him back, forgetting all about her desire to keep the mansion as something to keep for after their marriage. In fact, more than once when they spent the night at her father's place, Christian had to be the reasonable one reminding her that she wanted to wait.

In fact, for the first time of their intimate life, Ana felt like Christian had lost all sorts of control of himself. The Christian who always made it his personal mission to see her satisfied before business even started was gone, replaced by a demanding and excited Christian who was endlessly kissing her with his passion burning for her.

With eagerness and hunger, she reached for his belt, not really caring about anything but making one with her lover, and guiding him inside of her. She felt a slight discomfort, proving her that, no matter how much she had wanted it, her body wasn't as ready as she would have wanted. And after he waited a little while for her to get used to his invasion, he started going in and out.

She moaned with pleasure, and though Christian had always been the one to insist for eye contact when they were making love, she was the one this time who made him hold onto her gaze. She kept his face between her tiny hands, her eyes locked with his as he kept his back and forth moves.

They were just like one, sharing one breath, one gaze, one heartbeat and she never wanted that moment to end. She could feel her pick coming, just as Christian's was, making her clench his hair and moan out his name. He captured her lips in a biting but sweet kiss, silently saying what she knew his heart would say if it could speak; and just as quickly as it started, they found their climax together.

When her breath went back to a normal rate, she looked back at Christian, blissfully happy, and felt all his love for her when he looked back at her with a gleeful satiated smile.

"I love you, Ana. More than anything."

She smiled, and pecked his lips, "I love you too."

"Right here, right now is the happiest I've ever been." He retrieved himself and she repressed a grimace, not wanting Christian to see her discomfort. Still, he kissed her lips with love, taking her in his arms bridal style, and walking them to the nearest bathroom.

Once there he let the water run a little, all the while keeping his eyes on Ana who couldn't help but smile like a kid. "I knew you'd be excited about the baby."

This made him frown as if the words were sour to him, and as he pressed a hot towel between her legs, he explained, "I am excited, but it's because it's _our _baby. I do want to be a father, Ana, you've always known that. But for a while, it has been more than simply being a father. I want to be the father of _your _children. Any other woman won't do. It's just you. You and I."

She smiled and kissed him, incredulous that once again, Christian managed to make her feel so special with a few mundane words. When they broke their kiss, Christian bent down to kiss her stomach as well,

"Let me go check on that casserole Gail made."

She smiled and watched him go, feeling like she was on cloud nine. Then, she decided to take a quick refreshing shower before joining her fiancé back in the kitchen where she was surprised to find her father as well, casually talking to Christian. She hadn't expected him for another hour, and now she had the feeling that he had come home when Christian and she had been celebrating in the dining room. Though, Christian did not show a sign of embarrassment. One thing was for sure, they would eat in the kitchen.

"What did the doctor say?" Was the first thing Raymond asked his daughter when he saw her, concern in his tone. She was about to dismiss his worry when Christian's phone rang. She saw on the screen Gia's name displayed before he picked it up and left the room.

For a moment, she forgot she wasn't alone and didn't try to hide her annoyance. Which did not go unnoticed by her father,

"Are you alright sweetheart?"

"Yes, of course, Dad," She said with as much conviction as she could.

No matter how much she trusted Christian and the love he had for her, she couldn't get over the fact that she didn't like Gia. Gia felt … like the other woman working with her man and reminding him that the grass was greener out there. She was nothing like Ana. She was strong, independent and far from being naive, whereas Ana knew who she was. She never would have achieved anything if it wasn't for her father, she got fooled more often than not, she was spoiled, and Christian clearly didn't see her as strong since he always insisted on having Lauren on her back.

Gia was the woman Christian would've such an easy relationship with, unlike her. They were from the same world. They probably understood things that Ana never would. They probably shared more commonalities than Ana and Christian ever would. And most importantly, Gia was always smiley and doe-y eyed for Christian, no matter how much Christian didn't see it.

She looked at her father, seeing in his eyes that he was ready to push the issue, and so she directed him elsewhere, "I'm just wondering where Christian is taking me for our honeymoon. Do you know?"

"I have a fairly good idea, but I won't tell you."

"Oh, _please_, Dad!"

Raymond gently shook his head, and explained, "I won't take that away from Christian. He wants to surprise you, and I understand."

Ana pouted, but her father remained on his position, especially since the conversation was cut short by Christian coming back in the kitchen. The three of them sat at the table and started eating when Raymond looked at his daughter with intensity and asked again,

"What did the doctor say?"

"More fright than harm," She eluded, not sure if Christian wanted to share the news yet or not. They hadn't had time to discuss about it, yet. _She_ wanted to let the whole wide world know, but maybe Christian was one of those people who would rather wait for the world to see.

"You seem different," Raymond insisted, making her uncomfortable for she didn't want to lie to her Dad.

Discreetly, Christian put his hand on her knee, before he let her father know, "She is. She's expecting."

For a moment both men stayed silent, staring at one another and saying with their eyes things Ana couldn't fathom before Raymond muttered,

"That explains a lot." Then he turned to his daughter, his whole face lighting up, though, for a split second, she saw fear in his eyes,

"I'm so happy for you, sweetheart."

"You better get your spoil ready, because I fully expect you to spoil your grandchildren rotten," She joked, making both men laugh.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, what did you think? There is a baby on the way. Sooooooooo cute. **

💚**And, yes, Ana is clearly jealous of Gia, but is she right? Remember that she was jealous of Mia as well at first.**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was the 'F*** Raymond' from Christian. He knew Raymond was home, or on his way, and at that moment, he couldn't care less.**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	78. Chapter 9: All I Need

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚**Just enjoy the sweetness that is coming ...**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 9****: **** All I Need ~ by Within Temptation (8,2K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana woke up in the middle of the night with her bladder bursting. Still, she did not get out of bed straight away, appreciating Christian's arm on her naked breast for a few moments. Even though her brain was still foggy with sleep, she couldn't stop smiling, still high on the joy of now being **_Mrs_** Anastasia Chritian Steele. This was her first night as Christian's wife, and she hadn't been able to stop smiling since they tied the knot two days ago.

As discreetly as she could, she got out of bed, though Christian's hold on her unconsciously got slightly tighter before letting her go, and she went to the bathroom, doing her best to not get lost on the way. They had arrived earlier in the evening and spent most of that time celebrating their union until Ana collapsed of exhaustion.

She was actually glad that Christian had kept the secret as to the destination of their honeymoon because as he had promised, she liked the surprise better. They were on an island on the coast of Japan, but what made Ana immediately jump in her husband's arms was the fact that the island was his gift to her. She had been surprised in more than one way to be fair. It was more than the fact that she had no idea of where their honeymoon would be, but mostly the fact that Christian had always been subtle in his ways to show her that he loved her. He was not a romantic per-say, even if he still had spontaneous gestures that always warmed her heart.

For instance, Christian was not the type of guy who would come back home with a bouquet of purposely chosen flowers or would sing a song in public to declare his love like Ryan did to propose to Suzie. But he still did subtle things that made Ana's heart melt. Like the time he took her to a Broadway show, though she knew that he hated musicals; or the fact that he always made a point to come to her charity events when he was in town, even when she knew he was very busy.

And still, the island that Christian had gifted her for their wedding was just … extravagant coming from him, not that she liked the gesture any less, she just wasn't expecting him to do something so over the top. Though he did not say it, she knew why he chose japan, it was where their story started, and she loved that little extra thought he put in the gift. She was not going to lie, Christian was terrible at remembering important dates, and she was sure that there would be many forgotten anniversaries and Valentines in their future, but though she cared about the missed celebrations, she cared more about the fact that Christian always paid attention to what she would say. On more than one occasion, she had mindlessly said that she wanted to go back to Japan with him for a holiday, so they would recapture the magic of their stolen moments, and Christian had given her a reason to come back more than once.

When she was finished in the bathroom, she slipped in a robe and went to the terrace, feeling that jet-lag was catching up to her and that she would not be able to go back to sleep. She watched the sunrise in the horizon, sipping on some tea as her mind wandered to when Christian saw her walking down the aisle at her father's arm.

_Her heart was beating incredibly fast as she walked down the aisle with her father, to the rhythm of the music. Christian looked at them walking to him, his face as expressionless as usual when they were with other people, but still, Ana saw that little smile that briefly sparkled in his eyes when he saw her in her dress. In fact, she had completely changed her idea of her dream dress because of that smile, to Elena's greatest astonishment. _

_Her dress mostly respected tradition by being white, and she made a point of not having long sleeves, though this had always been one of her reasons why she wanted a summer wedding, just so she could wear a bustier dress. But instead of going for the sateen dress she had planned for most of her life, she had decided to go for a dress with lace and a large skirt. Though she knew that the thing that made Christian smile wasn't the dress in itself, but the blue flowers, birds and jewels finely detailed all over her bustier and elegantly falling on her white skirt. _

_Though he only told her once, Christian always showed her how much he appreciated that she remembered that little thing and always wore blue when they attended an event together, and she couldn't think of a better occasion than their wedding to keep that tradition going. Especially when she had always dreamed of a Cinderella wedding and she knew that this dress would make any Disney princess pale with envy._

_She had kept her hair rather simple, making sure it was gathered in one side of her face, and that the veil did not hide the comb that her own mother wore during her own wedding. That little piece of her that made her feel that Carla Steele was by her side on this particular day, her heart beating with as many emotions as Ana's. According to Elena, Carla wore her hair the exact same way on her own wedding, and that little information made Ana feel closer to her mother more than ever. In a way, she hoped that this comb would be her lucky charm and that it would bring to her marriage as much love as it brought to her mother's, though she hoped to not hold the same tragic fate._

_She saw how Christian quickly glanced at the comb whilst her father was kissing her forehead, and she was glad that he paid attention to that detail important to her. Though she had told him a lot about that piece of jewellery that her father had given her, she never showed him the jewel in question, keeping its reveal for the big day, even if she knew that Christian was only indulging her with that whole wedding ordeal. A part of her was sure that Christian would have been perfectly fine living in sin or simply going to Vegas over a weekend to tie the knot. _

_Once Father Crowley started his sermon, Ana had notion of nothing but Christian and the way his hands were lovingly holding hers with delicateness. She had experienced first hand how strong and powerful those same hands could be, and yet, at that moment they were holding her as if she was a dove. _

_With a bright smile, she looked at her husband to be, her heart pounding in her chest, still trying to grasp reality over the fact that she would soon be Christian's wife in front of God and men. There was still this part of her that couldn't believe how close she came to lose him over a simple misunderstanding, because she had been too scared to ask him to clarify one simple little sentence, because -though she had taken it from many other people- she wouldn't be able to hear that Christian valued her father's opinion more than hers. _

_But the way he was looking at her in that moment proved that he would never love anything or anyone the same way he loved her. She was, and always would be the one person whose opinion mattered most to him. And maybe their children would have the same status later in life, but that was different, it was their children. _

_She glanced down at her still flat stomach, looking at their unborn child, and though her eyes were cast down, she knew that he just did the same. They haven't told anyone yet about her pregnancy, except for Raymond, and Father Crowley (who made a joke on how timely that pregnancy came for her), because Ana wanted to tell after their honeymoon. She wanted to keep this little secret for themselves until sharing it with the whole wide world. _

_She was taken out of her thoughts by Christian gently squeezing her hands before reaching for her ring and sliding it on her fingers as he said his vows, _

_"I take you, Anastasia Rose Steele, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, to always be loyal and truthful to you, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness, in health, to love and to cherish, until death do us part, according to God's holy law. And this is my solemn vow to you."_

_She smiled, her eyes going to the ring to keep her tears of happiness from falling. Still, she noticed the slight variation Christian made. Father Crowley had asked them if they wanted to write their own vows 'like many people of the new generation did', but Ana refused. Sure, she would have liked better to have more intimate vows, but she also knew that Christian was someone very private when it came to his feelings and that those feelings were very strong when it came to her. So she declared that they would stick to the traditional vows. _

_And yet, Christian made a point on adding that little line for her. Of course, she knew that Christian would be loyal to her, he loved her. Even if she ever doubted that fact, Mia was there to remind her that Christian only had eyes for her, and Jose even made a couple of jokes alluding to the fact that Christian never masturbated, and only relieved his tension with her. But the part she liked was the trust. _

_After all, with his line of work, it would be so easy for him to lie to her, and she knew that she was naive enough to not see through his deceptions. But Christian had always told her that he would always be honest with her. And now, he was reiterating his promise in front of God. Sure, she knew that Christian was not a person of faith, but she was, and therefore, he knew that this particular would hold a special meaning for her._

_She took Christian's ring out of the cushion and said her own vows, her eyes solely on his face. He had never looked so handsome before. Sure, she liked him better in a pair of jeans and with the shadow of a beard tainting his cheeks, but at this right moment, he looked perfect. _

_Once again, he had gone with tradition, sticking to the black tuxedo that every man wore at their wedding, but he had a marigold pocket square which made her smile, that simple nod to her favourite colour. He also had his hair trimmed, though she liked it a bit longer, and she highly suspected that Elena had something to do with that haircut. After all, after she mindlessly told Christian that she liked his hair long enough for her to grab, he always kept his hair long enough for her to grab it. _

_As she finished saying her vows, she let herself get lost in Christian's silver eyes and the love they held for her. In all honesty, she had never felt so loved before. It was as if the church was empty, and there was only Christian and her. He had this magical power to make her feel unique in a way no one else ever could. She didn't count her Dad, because the love of a parent was something else entirely. _

_As Father Crowley asked if anyone was against their union, her heart skipped a bit. Not much because she feared someone might get up and reject her marriage, but because Christian, though his eyes never left hers, suddenly had an imposing and menacing posture, as if daring anyone to refuse him this moment. _

_And finally, the words she had been waiting all her life to hear came from Father Crowley's mouth, "I pronounce you husband and wife." _

_Christian gently rose his ringed hand to her face, caressing her cheek with love before he leaned and she finally got to kiss the man she had wanted to marry for years. Though she had never admitted to Mia or Kate, she had pictured Christian as her future husband pretty early on in their relationship. And for a long time, she thought it would only be a dream she would never be able to share with anyone, because of who Christian was and his connection to her father. But it turned out that her dream became reality, and at this right moment, she felt like she was lost in a sweet fairy tale ending, as she was kissing the man who just became her husband._

She loved using that word, '_husband_'. In fact, she had noticed that Christian loved calling her his wife, and letting the world know of that. He had used the sentence '_my wife and I_' so many times that she felt that he was trying to brand it, not that she was bothered by it. She had to admit that it was a bit weird to keep her maiden name and have Christian take it as well because she had always pictured herself taking her husband's name, but she understood why Christian insisted on dropping his name.

He never had to spell it out for her, but she assumed that Christian had no intention on giving his father's name to his children because of the resentment he still had against his parents. In fact, she was actually surprised at how polite he had been during the wedding, even indulging Grace Grey with a dance when Ana danced with Carrick, though Ana was sure that it was mostly a reaction to her pointing out to him that him keeping his parents at bay meant that he would deny his children the spoil of grandparents.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she jumped out of her skin when she received a loving peck on her cheek, dropping her empty mug on her laps as Christian looked at her with mirth dancing in his eyes. She picked up her mug, playfully glaring at her man who was looking at her with love, his pyjama trousers on. She let her eyes travel on the rest of his naked body, appreciating the fact that she fell in love with a man who had a body for himself, full of toned muscles and with stamina that she got to benefit from quite often.

"I woke up before you, you lazy bum," She smugly said with a grin, making Christian quirk an eyebrow at her because they both knew that she had only been up early because of jet lag and that Christian had already caught up with his lack of sleep of the past few days. Still, he did not argue with her logic and simply crouched by her side to be at eye-level with her, and she kissed him with love.

"Thank you again for my wedding gift," She said, repeating for the umpteenth time how much she loved her present. She had always loved getting gifts, but nothing compared to the spoil that Christian gave her for her wedding.

"Thank you for mine."

She grimaced, feeling that Christian got cheated somewhere in that 'exchange' of gifts. Sure, he had told her that he was only interested in the smile she would have when she would see what her present was, but it felt like very little compared to what he gave her. And yet, no matter how much she tried to think of something that would please Christian, she couldn't figure out a way to surprise him the way he had surprised her, which she blamed on his minimalistic approach of life.

"Do you want tea?" She asked, getting up with a small pinch in her heart as she thought that her coffee days were over for at least the next year coming.

She walked to the kitchen and put the kettle on, still noticing from the corner of her eye that Christian discreetly put his gun in one of the drawers. The very few rare times she had woken before Christian, he had always looked for her with his gun in hands as if anyone would be fool enough to try and harm her in his own home. But she never said anything, because she knew that this was how he was and that there was no point in trying to change something that was too deeply rooted inside him.

As she reached for the tea bags in one of the cupboards, Christian stood behind her, taking her in his arms as he languorously pointed out, "We still haven't christened the kitchen …"

"We still haven't christened the terrace either. And yet, you contented yourself with a simple peck. We haven't been married a week yet that you're already getting bored in that department," She teased with a playful smile, though her whole body was leaning against his.

"You're right. I have been failing my duties as your devoted husband," He conceded, something predatory echoing in his tone instead of penance.

She never had the opportunity to retort anything to that, because he captured her lips with his and gave her a long, luscious kiss that clearly indicated that he was about to physically prove that he was indeed a devoted husband. She smiled, wrapping her hands around his neck and deepening their kiss as his fingers were already opening her robe so he could have access to her body.

Without much efforts from his part, he picked her up and sat her down on the kitchen isle, his silver eyes shining with lust as they ravaged her body. She briefly shivered when her thighs touched the marble surface, but barely focused on it as she let her robe fall from her shoulders, all smiles to Christian.

These were probably the only times they would get to be freaky outside of their bedroom. After all, they were moving in the mansion, and even though Christian said he would still keep his apartment in Manhattan, they were about to be parents. It wouldn't be the same now that they would always have a kid around. This was why she fully intended to take as much pleasure from her honeymoon as possible.

She expected Christian to resume kissing her, but he groaned something about breakfast, before demonstrating exactly what kind of breakfast he had been talking about. She took a sharp breath, closing her eyes and arching her back as his tongue played wonders on her sweet little nub. She enjoyed the melody Christian was orchestrating for her, taking a particular delight when he added a finger and then another. In fact, she was so overwhelmed that she herself started to sing, glad that there was no one but them in the house.

As the pressure was getting stronger and stronger, she started trashing, trying to find something to hold on to, but the edges of the isle were too far, so she grabbed his head, slightly destabilised once again by the length of his hair, and she found herself begging for Christian. She wasn't sure what she was begging for. For him to stop, or for him to never stop. She just wanted … she wasn't sure anymore.

Though she had her eyes closed, she could feel his gaze on her as he kept pleasuring her with his magical tongue, his head between her legs who were resting on his shoulders, and when he used his other hand to keep her still, to take some control away from her as he gently nibbled her clit, that was the moment when she felt the world coming down to her. She let out a satisfied heave, lazily opening her eyes as Christian kissed his way up, slowly erasing the taste of her on her skin.

She knew, just by the way he had just played with her and the way he was hungrily looking at her that it was far from over. She had noticed that the more earth-shattering were the foreplays, the longer Christian intended to play with her, just making sure that she would be loose enough to take him without discomfort.

Once he was kissing her again, she reached between her legs and took possession of his member after having slightly rubbed her hand with her own juices. She went up and down, stimulating him, though she knew she was far from her game and she wouldn't be able to tease him as she would usually do, and after a few minutes o pleasurable strokes, Christian took back the lead and impaled her in one swift motion.

She squeaked of pleasure as he strongly tangled one of his hands in her hair, silently indicating her that he was about to be anything but sweet. This had never been a spoken rule between them, but she had noticed that every time Christian strongly grabbed her hair, he was rougher than usual.

He looked at her blue eyes, love and lust mixing in a sweet combination that made her insides squeeze, and as he pounded into her with force and determination, and she planted her nails in his biceps, trying to get some control over herself. She wanted to make their intercourse lasts as long as possible, but it seemed that Christian was set on making her see stars again already.

His grey eyes sparkled with victory as he hit her G-spot, making her moans slightly turn to screams and her eyes roll to the back of her head, until she became undone, crying out his name, sure that some of her nails tore the skin of his arms. He pecked her as she came down her high, and when she started to rotate her hips to help him finish, he brought her face to his and darkly explained,

"I am far from finished with you."

Then, he picked her up, and relocated them, kissing her passionately. She briefly wondered how he managed to not bump them into any pieces of furniture or walls, and before she knew it, she was back on the terrace, the sun much higher in the sky warmly kissing their skins.

"Are you okay to stand?" He asked with love and concern, and for only answer, Ana got to her feet, not bothered the slightest in the world that they were both naked for the world to see.

He smiled at her, cupping her face to resume his kissing, but for once, she was faster than him and kneeled before him, taking his member in her hand as she glanced up, pretending to be all innocent about it. She ever so slowly took his monster-cock in her mouth, a wicked sense of victory when she saw him close his eyes and jerk his head backwards, and she started pumping what could not fit in her mouth with her hand.

Though she had never been a big fan of blowjobs, she liked how they were affecting Christian. Probably because he rarely let her go down, and therefore amplified the rarity of the pleasure. What she liked the most about giving him that sort of bliss was the fact that he seldom kept his usual control when she had him in her mouth. In fact, she liked even starting foreplays with her on her knees, because it set him wild and she always benefited from that. There hadn't been a single time where Christian left her unsatisfied, especially after she gave him such satisfaction.

As she did her best to keep a certain cadence, Christian's fingers found their way to her hair, and for a second, he looked down, as if asking if it was okay for him to take control of the rhythm. She smiled as best as she could before closing her eyes and letting Christian know that she was okay with him taking the lead. then, she closed her eyes, focusing on still stimulating the rest of his member with her hand as she did her best not to gag.

She heard him swear several times, making her smile for he ever so rarely swore in front of her and when she took a step backwards when she felt that he was about to blow. Christian took over his masturbation, his eyes locked on hers before he sprayed his load on her chest with a heave of satisfaction. Though they never talked about it, it seemed that he instinctively knew that she wasn't really fond of him finishing in her mouth, and he actually never did. He always discharged either on her chest, either inside her.

As he was trying to catch his breath, she got up, kissing her way up to his lips, and once she kissed his lips, he grumbled to her, "Still, I am far from being finished with you."

"Goodie."

As much as it had pleased Christian to receive a fellation, it still turned her on to please her man like that. And he had the good surprise to realise so as he slipped a finger inside of her and took note of how wet she was for him. They kissed zealously whilst he was stimulating himself, reigniting their passion.

Without any sort of warnings, he spun her around so she would face the sea crashing on the beach, and he took her from behind, after having lubed himself with his own juices. He nibbled her ear, a hand on her stomach as he languorously whispered in her ear,

"Hold on to the bar, babe. I'm going to be rough and make you lose your breath."

She did as told, a part of her mind briefly wondering if she should feel weird having sex in the open like that when birds and other sorts of animals could clearly see them, but all sort of reasons what knocked out of her once Christian increased his thrusts. It was more than rough, it was almost animalistic. She held on tighter to the bar, her throat become drier and drier due to her sharps intakes of breath and as she felt yet another orgasm to her, much stronger than the ones she had before, Christian's hand snaked from her stomach all the way down to her clit, so he could play with it, making her scream bloody murder.

In fact, for a moment, she thought that she would pass out of pure pleasure if it hadn't been for the fresh brisk of air caressing them. Christian slowed down his pace, bringing his hand up so he could provide her support. He lovingly pecked her back, and once her head was no longer spinning, she started rocking her hips again, hoping to give him something as earth-shattering as he just gave her.

But Christian stepped back and picked her up, making her feebly giggled as she questioned, "Are we going to christen every room of this house today?"

He grinned at her, and she could see the answer in his eyes before he could even say a word, "No. I just want to make love to you, now. And what better place than our bed?"

She smiled back, a part of her relieved that he was not going to take her in every room of this house. Sure it was much smaller than the mansion back in New York, but it still had quite a few unexplored rooms, and she felt that her body wouldn't be able to take so much action all at once.

Once in the bedroom, Christian laid her on the bed, but Ana decided otherwise and made sure that he was the one lying in bed before she impaled herself on him. She then laid on top of him and rotated her hips in that way Christian loved so much when she was on top, her eyes locked on his as he kept telling her how much he loved her.

She knew she was too drained, and a bit too sore to enjoy an actual orgasm, but she helped Christian get his own, still feeling a little something as he unloaded himself inside of her.

With a smile of satisfaction, she let herself fall on his chest, closing her eyes as she listened to his heart coming back to a normal cadence whilst his fingers gently traced her skin, and after a little while of peaceful and blissfully quiet, Christian moved them.

With love still shinning in his grey eyes, he retrieved himself and once again, she couldn't help her grimace of discomfort. She was not going to lie, she loved sex, and she loved it, even more, when Christian was raw and rough. But it often left her sore, no matter how much Christian tried to get her ready beforehand. And no matter how much she told Christian that she liked the soreness, that it was a part of sex for her, it never failed to bring a concerned frown between his brows.

Though she was too lazy to get up herself, she couldn't help but smile when she heard that he was running a bath for her in the ensuite bathroom. It took her a couple of minutes for her to find the strength to join him there, but he was nowhere to be seen, so she used the opportunity to use the toilet. Then, she got into the tube, loving the feeling of the burning water on her skin, and especially how soothing it was on her sore and still slightly throbbing sex.

She knew that Christian would not join her since he had never appreciated hot water, so she cut down the water and closed her eyes, wondering how Christian could be such a sweet man when it came to those little things that no one would ever know, and yet, such a cold and terrifying person to everyone else. She closed her eyes, soothed by the calming effect of the warm water and let herself slightly doze off, slightly curious of Christian's whereabouts.

She was startled a few moments later by Christian walking back in the bathroom, still naked and holding a tray with fruits and teas for the two of them. As he placed the tray across the bathtub, he let her know,

"As much as I'd like to stay with you locked up in the house all day, we need to go out and buy more substantial food."

"I can live on love and fresh water," She grinned, picking on the grapes Christian just brought, and he condescendingly shook his head as he pointed out,

"Maybe, but I can't. And neither can the baby."

Her smile widened and she placed a hand on her stomach, getting excited over the idea that soon, it could grow with their child in it. She hoped that Christian would not turn into one of those husbands who became overbearing once their wives became pregnant, but so far, in the very few days he had known about their future child, he had been reasonably normal.

As she overtly ate the fruits from the tray, widely opening her eyes when Christian made a move to come in the bath with her. She scooted a little bit so he would have space behind her, and she saw how all his muscles tensed as his body hit the water. She gave Christian a minute for his body to adjust to this unusual temperature he was imposing to it, and once he seemed to relax a little, she leaned against him, kissing his chest where he was tattooed.

"Did you plan anything for those two weeks, or can I ask for a shopping spree?"

"You can set the pace and we can do whatever you want. Just know that I have an appointment in Tokyo on Tuesday."

Her enthusiasm flattened immediately as her hopes of a honeymoon free of Christian's work shattered on the floor. Though she could not see him, she knew that he had closed his eyes as he leaned against the tub and assured her, "It's not work-related, I promise."

"You're not going to tell me what it is, then?"

"Mmmh … I think I will let you see for yourself. You're cute when you're curious."

"Am I cute when I shop as well? Because I've never shopped in Beijing, and I was thinking that maybe we could spend the weekend there before going to Tokyo, then?"

She felt Christian freeze as she mentioned the Chinese capital, and she instantly felt bad, remembering how Christian had almost died in Macau a few years earlier. He probably did not want to go back to the country where he almost lost his life and thinking about it, neither did she.

"I'm sorry, I forgot about Macau."

"It has nothing to do with that. I've been there several times since then. It's just … I'd rather if I could take you to Beijing some other time. There have been some tensions between us, lately."

She nodded, not really eager to talk about Christian's gruesome job during their honeymoon. She had learnt to live with it and the fact that she could actually talk about it with Christian. In fact, she did ask him several times about his day, about his work, but this was not something she wanted to dwell into during the most romantic time of her marriage.

"We can go to Seoul, then. Let's keep the Chinese shopping when we will come back with our baby to walk on the Great Wall."

He kissed her head, bringing his hands to her stomach, and she asked, finishing the last grapes,

"Do you want a boy or a girl?"

"A boy.

"That was fast. And it's not what you're supposed to say. You're supposed to that you want a healthy baby."

She heard him chuckled, making her head bob a little as he explained, "Of course I want our baby to be healthy. But I'd rather have a boy first, so he can take care of his siblings afterwards."

"You're being so archaic right now. It can go both ways. Kate protects Jake. And Elliott has a big sister, and she kicked a lot of asses in school when he was bullied for being the nerd that he is."

"I am fully aware that girls can kick ass too. I'm the one who got Lauren on your tail. But I guess you're right, I am being archaic."

"Do you want a boy first because of what you do?"

"You mean because I'm a mobster?" It always seemed so easy for him to say that word, whilst she still struggled with it. Even though they were very much open about it now, and only abstained to talk about this side of his job when they were with her father, she still struggled to say that one particular word out loud, or even think it.

"No, babe. Whether we have girls or boys, I will not be like your father on this. Don't get me wrong, I understand that he gave you a life that I'm denying our children, but I refuse to have them … blissfully ignorant of what I do. If they want to follow my footsteps, it is completely up to them, though."

She nodded, far from disagreeing with Christian. Though she was grateful that her Dad had given her the life she had, she still did not wish to reiterate the same path with her own children. No matter how happy and sweet her life had been under her father's eyes, she didn't want her kids to grow in the same bubble that could be burst open at any time.

"You on board with me for that, right babe?" Christian inquired, taking her chin between his fingers to make her look at him.

She smiled, surprised that he would think that she would object when they had a similar conversation a couple of months ago on how she fully intended on raising her children with her faith, though she would not impose her religion on them and let them chose on their own when they would be old enough.

With a satisfied sigh, he leaned to kiss her, his free hand caressing her stomach with love, and when they broke their sweet kiss, she unplugged the tub and let some water go before replugging it and warning her husband,

"I'm going to add some hot water."

She felt him tense in anticipation of the heat, and she made a mental note to make the effort of learning to handle the cold more because she definitely liked the sweet intimacy of having a bath with Christian. Or maybe, she could make sure that once in a while, her father would not be home, and Christian and she could have some fun times in the pool, though it would be something different. A bathtub clearly felt more intimate than a pool.

"Well, since you're hoping for a boy first, I was thinking of names. And I feel like Michael would be great for our firstborn."

She waited for a little to get an answer from him, but Christian remained quiet until she had to turn her head to look at him, at least to see if he had heard her. She was met with that mask he usually kept for everyone else but her, the one she hated so much because it was impossible for her to read into his thoughts, and so she explained her point-of-view,

"Christian … I know that you didn't get to know Mike, but … he was a good person, and a good brother to me. And to be fair, I'm sure you would have gotten along with him. I just … want to honour my brother, and I can't think of a better way."

Once again, she waited for him to say something, but he remained silent, his eyes steady on her though she could tell that his brain was going at a thousand miles an hour. And finally, he closed his eyes, leaning back as he simply said,

"I'd rather not."

For a moment, she simply stared at him, shocked that he was not giving her any sort of explanations as to why he wouldn't do that one simple thing. In fact, this was something she had tried not to think about ever since he had brought her the devastating news of her brother's demise. She was sure that he knew what happened to Mike in excruciating terrible details, but he kept it for himself in order to spare her.

But that was before, now that they had been honest about who and what he was, he could tell her anything else. Which was why she insisted,

"Do you know what happened to him? I mean, the long version, not the version where you try to spare my feelings?"

He opened back his eyes, coldly tilting his head to her as he darkly warned her, "Don't go there. Don't ask that next question."

"You're the one who swore to me before God that you'd always be honest with me," She bargained, trying to catch him in his own web, but Christian simply smiled with compassion to her, cupping her face with love and finally forgoing his cold mask as he said,

"And you're the one who told me that you trusted me to know best when you wanted to know something or not. Of course, I won't lie to you, but I'm telling you, babe, _trust me _and don't ask any more about it."

She hesitated a moment, still wanting to know more, though a part of her told her to trust Christian and his instincts on the matter. After all, knowing more about Mike would not bring him back and she trusted Christian's love for her enough to think that Christian had advanced her brother in a way or another, even if he didn't tell her. Maybe Mike had ended up in the wrong crowds, amongst drug dealers or some other people from whom he thought Raymond's reputation would protect him, and Christian just did not want to shatter that pristine image she had of her brother. And in a way, she was grateful for that.

So, she dropped the issue, and tried to hide her heavy heart as she said, "So, Mike's out of the picture, but we still have time to find another name."

Christian once again forced her to look at him in the eye and told her, "I love you, Ana. Whatever happens in our lives, you will always come first, you _do_ know that, don't you?"

She nodded with a small smile, and he let her know before kissing her, "Your happiness comes first to me, and if I have to make you a little sad to keep you happy in the long run, I will always choose that option."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

After they spent the weekend in Seoul, Ana had one sole focus, going back to the island. Sure she enjoyed sightseeing and shopping, especially when she had the opportunity to buy matching _hanbok _for Christian, their baby and herself (to Christian's greatest dismay), but she was also very eager to go back to the quietude of their island where she could have her husband all to herself before she would have to share him with the world again.

They were now in Tokyo, on their way to Christian's mysterious appointment before they would take the ferry back to their island, and she literally melted when she finally caught up with Christian's intentions. He took them to a traditional tattoo parlour where he got the date of their wedding tattooed on his chest, right above his left pec, opposite the tattoo he already had of a rose.

She wished she was not pregnant to do the same herself, and she made a mental promise to get the same tattoo after she would give birth. She stayed with him as he was getting inked for life how much their wedding meant to him, and her brain wandered to what her father told her before walking her down the aisle.

_"Are you happy, sweetheart?"_

_Ana rolled her eyes waving Kate and Mia good-bye as they said they would get in position. She checked on last time her appearance in the mirror, satisfied with the image she was showing and hoping that the photographer would be able to capture the magic of this day on his pictures so she would have something to show her children about how much their father made her happy._

_"Dad … I'm literally about to walk the aisle. I think it's a little too late for cold feet. Plus, Christian would never let me the runaway bride."_

_She watched her father look at her with pride and happiness, though there was a hint of sadness gleaming in his chocolate eyes, the ghost of Carla even more present than usual on this particular day. He sat by the vanity, worrying his daughter by his relocation. He was supposed to give her his arm and walk her to Christian. _

_"Dad?"_

_"Christian would let you be the runaway bride if you wanted. He's a better human being than I am."_

_"Don't be ridiculous, Dad. You're the best father there is out there. I wouldn't trade you for the world," She assured him, as she crouched by his side and took his hands in hers. _

_"He was ready to let you go when you broke up because he thought that this was what you wanted. This is how much he loves you. He'd rather be miserable if that meant you being happy."_

_"Did he tell you that?" _

_"He doesn't have to. I can see it in his eyes. As Elena pointed out several times, he looks at you the same way I used to look at your mother."_

_She stopped breathing altogether, surprised by this sudden mention of her Mom when her father always made sure to avoid the topic. She briefly considered asking how far along he was in his small barrel of whiskey and if he was drunk already, but decided against it, simply glad for that little thing her father had just given her. She knew that Christian loved her, but now she could quantify this love as being as eternal as the one Raymond had for Carla._

_"You look so much like her. Sometimes, I wish you'd look a bit more like me, because … it's not easy sweetheart. I loved her so much," He kept going, his eyes shining with emotions, and she tried to find something to say to make him feel better, but he shook his head,_

_"I'm sorry I never talk about her. It hurts for the both of us. But … I'm sure she would be so happy for you today. Seeing that you're marrying a man who loves you that much."_

_She smiled and kissed his cheek as she lightened a bit the mood. She was glad for that moment where her father opened up a bit about her mother, and though she was sure the alcohol played a big part in that, she was still grateful for it. But she did not want her father to have depressing thoughts on her wedding day, feeling that he was losing her just like he had lost his wife, so she jokingly said, _

_"Well, Christian doesn't have a choice than to love me, you're my Dad. Everyone is scared of you."_

_It seemed that this little sentenced that had been meant as a joke sobered him up, because he stood up, bringing her up with him, and told her, _

_"I'm getting old, Ana. People are more afraid of Christian than of me, now. And that includes me."_

_"Christian is not that bad. He's actually really nice," She chastised, defending her husband to be, like every time someone badmouthed him._

_Raymond chuckled, and retorted, "My point exactly. You're the only who's seen this side of him. You're the only he trusts enough to show his emotions to. I'm no idiot, Ana. I know he's loved you for a long time. That's why he came to you first after Macau, that's why he brought you to the cemetery on your mother's anniversary, that's why he agreed for a wedding in a church when we both know his views on religion. And most importantly, that's why he doesn't interfere in our relationship. He did make it clear to me that between us, he would choose you, and that he was going to make sure you knew that as well because this is the reason he lost you once. But, we are both in a bubble that none of us wants to burst, and though his presence should pop that bubble by his loyalty to the two of us, he still does his best to give you the father you want."_

This had been the closest of having her father admit who he really was to her, but she was sure that Raymond would take this opportunity that Christian was giving them and keep their relationship as it had always been. And though she knew it was childish of her, she would gladly stay in that bubble.

With a smile, she took Christian's right hand in hers, making small talks with the tattooist, and once he was done and they were out of the door, she let her husband know,

"If you ever doubt my love, just know that I too put you first Christian. Before whatever others say, before however, they might feel, it's you that I chose.I know that in the past, I let my selfishness get in the way, but ... if I ever have to choose, I'd even take you over my father, because I know that's what he'd want for the both of us, deep down."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** So, what did you think? I think I can honestly say this is the cutest thing I have ever written! I am surprised at myself. Promise, I'm killing someone next chapter. How about Bastille? haha**

**💚Concerning the last chapter, there are many things. So in my mind, Raymond came back a bit earlier than planned, and Christian heard him, but clearly did not care about him at that moment. So Ray just busied himself in the furthest part of the mansion. As for the pregnancy, well ... Christian wants to be a father so bad, to do right what has been done wrong to him. And Ana said several times that she just wants to be the best Mom out there. As for Gia ... well, she is here, but remember that I like playing against the cliches ...**

💚**And, I will put Ana's dress on Facebook, because it is a masterpiece. Whatever you pictured, double that, Ana always said she would not go little for her wedding!**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was the bath. It was sweet, intimate and with open hearts ...**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	79. Chapter 10: Somewhere

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚**Just enjoy the sweetness that is coming, from Christian's POV ...**

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 10****: **** Somewhere ~ by Within Temptation (6,0K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Christian's PoV**

After two weeks of magical bliss, came the time to go back to reality and to New York City. Of course, Ana tried to prolong their honeymoon, but Christian knew he wouldn't be able to give her the same undivided attention he had given her earlier. He had several businesses he needed to take care of and he wasn't interested in doing them over the phone. This was the one thing he knew he had before meeting Raymond and knew would never change, he liked to settle his issues in person.

Still, though she pouted a little, Ana didn't object much on them coming back on the due date, saying that she had a lot of shopping to start doing for their upcoming baby. To which, Christian honestly replied that he was glad that he had so much work to do so she couldn't drag him in every store there was. He didn't mind shopping with her once in a while, but that was because he liked spending time with Ana, out in the open.

Many people assumed that he would be like Raymond and be really private about his personal life. In fact, Ryan had even confessed to him that he thought that Christian would keep his relationship with Ana under the radar like he did when they were dating. But Christian wanted the world to know that Ana was his wife. Sure, his emotions were only for Ana to see, and no one else, but that didn't mean that he should keep her a secret. On the contrary, he wanted the world to know, so people would know better than to go after the one he loved.

Still, none of that was a problem at that present moment as their car was being pulled over in front of the mansion. Tony, one of the newest recruit, had come to pick them up from the airport and drove them back to Ana's childhood home, and when he pulled over, Christian told him to get their luggage's to the vestibule and leave them be afterwards. He knew that Raymond was not home, and he fully intended to enjoy the company of his wife to the fullest during this last couple of days alone with her.

He could tell that she was happy to be back home, just by the way her smile illuminated her eyes, but as she was about to walk in the mansion, he swept her off her feet and walked her through the thresholds, as any husband would walk his bride. She giggled, rolling her eyes but still lovingly kissing his cheek; and he did not let her down until they were in her room, his lust for her obvious in his eyes.

He could have had her as soon as they crossed the threshold, but he didn't know how long Tony would be, and he didn't want to have to wait. Moreover, he felt that their first time in their residential home should be sweet and loving, and therefore in their bed.

As he laid her on said-bed, he briefly took notice that Ana had made a few changes in it since he had last spent the night here with her. The room looked more mature and suited to a couple. There was a nightstand that was empty of decorations, waiting for him to put his stuff on it, many pictures of them were on the wall, replacing a few posters that Ana had there. In fact, any trace of Ana having grown as a young girl in this room had disappeared, it was now looking more like a young woman, letting someone else into her lair.

But he didn't really pay attention to those details, more interested in seeing the changes on Ana's body itself. They were lucky enough that the pregnancy didn't seem to affect Ana that much. She didn't have any morning sickness yet, nor any mood swings so far. Though it seemed that her sexual appetite, that was already strong, to begin with, had increased. But there was still some physical changes that Christian noticed, far from not appreciating them.

Though, as he had told Ana many times, he was more interested in her ass than her breast, he still liked that her boobs seemed fuller and even a tad more sensitive if her reactions were any indication. And there was also her stomach that was less toned than usual, though he highly suspected that it was due to her stopping working out as soon as she learnt that she was pregnant, rather than a pregnancy symptom yet.

With love, he kissed the woman who always made his heartbeat with life and emotion, his hands playing with her tender breast as well as with her sweet little pussy before he started trailing his way down. He had always flattered himself to know how to please a woman, whether it was with his tongue, his fingers or his cock; but he was sure that the was Ana liked it the most was with his tongue.

Over the years, she had become vocal when they were having sex, but the most vocal she'd ever been, almost to the point of losing her voice, was when he would go down on her. There was even that one time when he was pretty sure that she squirted, though he never let that moment sink since he plunged into her afterwards and rode her to another orgasm.

A part of him was tempted to play with her and to push her as much as possible. He had noticed that, though Ana liked to receive pleasure, she would always withhold at some point to give as much, turning her into something wild and demanding. But another part of him just wanted to simply make sweet love to his wife. And it was this part who won, stopping the teasing of his tongue on her most intimate part just so he could bury himself in her.

Without him having to ask, she opened her eyes, bathing him with her love, and he started his back and forth movement, grunting a little louder each time he would feel her walls clamp his cock. He never took his eyes off of her, breaking their eye contact only to kiss her in order to release her lip from her teeth. She didn't know about her father's whereabouts, and probably was doing her best to not make a noise.

"I want to hear you, babe. It's just you and me. Let me hear you scream my name as I make you come."

She meekly nodded, and he thrust into her a bit harder, ripping squeaks after squeaks from her. He loved the way her pupils were dilated, the way her hair was spread on the bed as she started trashing beneath him, the way her body temperature was rising as her breath was becoming rarer and rarer. He ground into her, doing his best to hit that little spot that would make her open her eyes and her mouth widely with delight.

And finally, he did hit that G-spot. Ana took a sharp breath, her voice incredibly high, before she incomprehensively said, "Babe … I … _Please_."

He didn't need her to formulate proper words to know what she meant. He threw her legs above his shoulders, loving the way he felt her when he took her like that and rammed into her like a jackhammer into the ground. There was nothing sweet or loving in his thrusts, but he couldn't care less because that sweet love was in her eyes as she looked at him whilst screaming out his name, taken over by her orgasm. He took him just a minute longer to find his own release, shooting inside her again and again until he felt completely empty.

For a moment, they did not move, if not to release Ana's legs from his shoulders, and when he had regained a normal heartbeat, he turned to kiss his girl. He kissed her shoulders, her neck, her jaw, her cheeks, her lips, all the while caressing her hair until he estimated that he had been on top of her for long enough. He had always wondered how could she withhold his weight, when she was so petite, _especially_ compared to him, and yet she never seemed to mind when he was catching his breath on top of her.

When he retrieved himself from her and rolled on the side, she did not protest, and that was proof enough for him that she was knocked out, which made him smugly smirk at the brunette. He liked to think that Ana never had to fake with him, but when he had her lying unconscious next to him because he had properly fucked her, he couldn't help but feel like a caveman pounding on his chest with pride. Especially since Ana always took the time to usually use the bathroom after their love-making.

With a gentle smile, he got off the bed and threw the covers on her before grabbing his trousers and putting them on. He picked up their clothes and threw them in the laundry basket in her -_their_\- ensuite bathroom and, after throwing cold water on his face and chest, he went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

He was not going to lie, the idea of living under the same roof as Raymond was still something a bit strange to him, but not for the same reasons as Ana's. If it wasn't for her, he wouldn't care the least in the world if Raymond would hear them being intimate or not. In fact, if it wasn't for Ana, Christian would make sure to make her scream every single time he was with her because her screams were such a turn on for him.

No, what worried Christian was the fact that living with both Raymond and Ana meant that he would have to let his guard down around Raymond. Sure, Raymond was one of the only people in this world he trusted with his life, but Ana was the only person he had ever trusted with his emotions. And now that Raymond was part of their home, he would have to show the older man this side of him he had protected over all those years.

Sure, he could keep on being around Raymond the way he had always been, rather cold and distant, but in the long run, Ana would be the one affected and Christian refused for her to pay for his behaviour. This was exactly the reason why they had lost two years, because he never showed her that she would come before her father, and since learning about that, Christian had promised himself to always make sure that Ana knew where his priorities laid. After all, actions spoke louder than words.

So he knew he would have to be more emotionally demonstrative around Raymond. He had already warned Ana about it, letting her know that this was not a change that she would see in a snap, but that would come over time and she had appreciated his thoughtfulness.

There was also the issue of Bastille. Ana and he had both agreed that they would bring Bastille in the mansion because they intended on spending more time there than in their apartment. But Christian was rather anxious about the cat's upcoming relocation. Sure, Bastille would enjoy the mansion much more than the apartment, because, in addition to having much more space, the mansion had a garden ... a field, more like it. But that was the issue. The garden … what if the cat ran away? Christian had never forbidden his cat to go out and about, and he wasn't comfortable doing it now, but that didn't reassure him, still.

As he was drinking his cold water, he heard a sudden noise behind him, and he swiftly grabbed one of the kitchen knives to face whoever was there. After all, Raymond would not be home until Monday, Tony knew better than to stay around and he did not recognise Ana's light footsteps.

He was faced with a trembling Gail who was looking at the knife as if her life was about to end, and so he put the knife back in its rightful place, though he was surprised by the maid's presence. Raymond had told him that she had her weekend off. He noticed the grocery bag in her arms, and she swallowed with difficulty before letting out in a squeak,

"I'm sorry, Mr Grey. I didn't mean to disturb you and Miss Ana now that you're back from your honeymoon. I just … made some shopping for you to enjoy over the weekend."

He nodded, not showing a single emotion and left her alone in the kitchen, glad that he had the good sense to put his trousers back one. That girl would have never taken him seriously if she had seen him in all his glory. If he was honest, he was not really comfortable at the idea of having a maid, but Gail had been working for Raymond and Ana for years, and he had no say in the matter.

He walked out of the mansion from the back door, enjoying the summer weather as he walked to the pool, where he crouched, staring at the water. This was where it all started. This was where he had first seen Anastasia Steele as more than his boss's daughter, but a fully developed young woman with a strong sex appeal. This was where he saw her with very little to cover her and thought that he would have happily pursued her if she hadn't been Raymond Steele's daughter.

"You okay, hun?" Ana's sweet voice asked from behind him, as she rested her hand on his shoulder. He had heard the noise behind him, but Ana had become such a part of him, that his subconscious had qualified the noise as non-threatening without even alerting him.

He turned his head and smiled to his wife sitting by his side and dipping her feet in the water. She had thrown a silk red robe over her, not having done anything about her hair and her face still shining with her after-sex glow. He assumed that she had stirred to consciousness to use the loo, and then went looking for him when she saw him missing from their bed.

"I'm not tired, yet, babe. Unlike you, jet lag doesn't affect me much."

"I know. But as Jose and I say, you're not human. And for your information, the sex was much more trying than the jetlag."

He smugly smirked at her, loving her for saying those words. This was the kind of ego boost every man needed to hear at least once in his life. He sat by her side, though kept his feet off the water unlike her and she rested her head on his shoulder as she said,

"It seems that Dad is not at home."

"He's spending the weekend at his hotel. He said he wanted to give us the privacy … 'newlywed couples deserved'. His words."

"In that case, maybe we should …" She trailed her sentence, though she moved so she could be straddling him and kiss his neck.

He slightly chuckled, because this was definitely proof that her sexual appetite had improved, and he gently pecked her lips before letting her know, "Gail is in the kitchen."

The kitchen's window had a view on the swimming pool and Christian would rather not give a show of what he could do to Ana to her maid. Ana pouted, though she did not move from her position as she enunciated a truth,

"She doesn't like you."

"I know."

"Maybe you could … I don't know, show her that you're actually a nice and sweet person."

This ought to make Christian genuinely laugh. Only Ana would use those words to describe him. She waited for him to stop laughing, not even the slightest amused, and he explained,

"The only person on this planet who believed I'm a good guy, is you, babe. And that's because … I love you and I want to be sweet and nice to you. When it comes to the rest of the world, I don't care. They can perceive however they want, it won't change the way I act with them."

"You _are_ a good man, Christian."

Once again, he shook his head, mostly to replace himself from laughing again. Still, the saying 'Love makes you blind' had never had a bigger impact on him than at that moment. And so he kissed her with love, admitting,

"I'm lucky you love me."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

A couple of weeks after they had come back from their honeymoon, Christian found himself in the waiting room of an ob-gyn with Ana. obviously, Ana was much more comfortable there than he was, making small talk with the receptionist and laughing with her, whilst Christian just sat there, impatiently waiting for their turn to come. There was a couple of other men who looked as lost and out of place as him, sitting next to their partners who had much larger bellies than Ana's.

It was strange how, no matter how many times he had projected himself as a father in the past, he never thought of that simple thing that was going to the doctor making sure his child was alright. He had pictured countless times holding his children, playing with them, doing mundane things with them, and even seeing them come into this world, but the almost mandatory visits to the doctor whilst the child was growing inside of his wife never crossed his mind.

Finally, the doctor called their name, and they went into the other room, sitting at the desk. Christian mostly followed Ana's lead and made a mental note to himself to ask Ana more about it later on. They were bound to come back here for this child and their future ones, and he hated feeling out of place.

Dr Johnson asked them several questions, mostly concerning their families medical issues, and as Ana was going first, Christian realised with annoyance that he would have to contact his parents to know all those little things that Ana seemed to know about her own family. After all, he had always been rather healthy, and only ever ended in a hospital when he needed stitching up, and that was when it was last resorts. He didn't even know his blood type.

Surprisingly, after she finished with her family medical history, Ana went on and gave his, letting the good doctor know of the few allergies that had been running in his family that he was not aware of, as well as a couple of cardiovascular issues that had apparently affected his maternal grandparents.

The doctor wrote everything down, before saying that they should get to the next room for an ultrasound. He went to the other room, expecting them to follow him, and Ana took Christian's hand in his as she explained,

"When Dr Joghnson said we needed medical background on my last visit, I decided to call your Mom a couple of days ago because I figured you'd rather not. She was more than happy to tell me all about your medical history."

"Thank you, babe."

She smiled, quite proud of her thoughtfulness, and she undressed, only keeping her bra and stocking on. As they walked to the next room, Dr Johnson, unfazed, asked Christian to close the door behind him as Ana climbed on the table; and as he did so, Christian had this weird feeling inside of him.

He had come to terms with the fact that he was a jealous man and that he liked to be the only one to see Ana in a certain way, so he had expected to be annoyed that their first ultrasound would not be one where _his_ wife could stay mostly clothed. But he felt nothing as the doctor put on his gloves and asked Ana to spread her legs.

Maybe it was because Ana had warned him that this would happen, or maybe it was because the man was old enough to be more than his father. Or maybe it was simply the fact that he knew the doctor was just doing his job and didn't see Ana as anything more than a patient. All he knew was he had expected to be jealous and to clench his jaw, but nothing of the sort happened.

Christian sat on the chair next to the table and Ana took his hand as they looked at the screen, listening carefully to what the doctor explained to them. And finally, they saw, lost amongst all this grey, a little dot.

"This little patch here, is you're baby. It's fourteen weeks old, roughly the size of a peach. In a month or so, we will be able to determine the gender. Do you want a picture?"

Ana nodded for the both of them, Christian being unable to tear his eyes away from the screen. He squeezed his wife's hand in his, his focus slipping from what the doctor was saying to that tiny little peach on the screen. And just when he thought his day couldn't get any better, the doctor pushed a button, and the world stopped to spin. All he heard was a wet and rapid thumping noise, making him finally look away from the screen to look at his wife, his vision getting slightly blurry.

She smiled to him, her lips slightly moving, though he was too ecstatic to hear what she said, and after a few more seconds, the most beautiful sound in the world was gone. He swallowed with difficulty, feeling rather than seeing that the doctor had left them alone once again, and Ana cupped his face, wiping the tear that had rolled down his cheek before lovingly kissing him.

"I wanted to share that moment with you. He proposed to me to listen to the heartbeat before the wedding, but I wanted you to be with me for that. And I'm so happy you appreciate it so much."

He tried to thank her, but his throat was still tight, so he just kissed her. Though what he had meant as a chaste kiss quickly grew into something more savage and passionate. He crushed her against him, only wanting to bury himself inside of her when she was making so happy, barely wearing anything. It took all his willpower to step back and break their kiss.

Without a word, he went back to the doctor's cabinet only to get Ana's dress, and for a moment, he was tempted to bribe the doctor to give him fifteen minutes with his wife … or even five, given how excited he was. Dr Johnson turned a knowing head to him but did not move a muscle as if to tell Christian that whatever happened in that room, he would not move from his desk.

With a little sigh of resignation, Christian gave back her dress to Ana, and she told him with excitement as she put it back on,

"We have a healthy baby on the way."

He smiled to her, still at loss for words, and kissed her with restraint, but love.

"I love you, babe. I have no other words. I love you," He knelt down and kissed her stomach whispering to their unborn child, "And I love you too."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Christian's PoV**

A few days after Ana invited Ryan and Suzie to their house, mostly because she felt that Christian did not spend enough time with his Godson, Brian. She had proposed for them to babysit the kid for the weekend, which was clearly appreciated by the couple. She was going over the dinner plans with Gail, when Raymond got home, brightly smiling to his daughter.

If there was one person who was probably as happy as the couple about their upcoming child, it was Raymond. He could not stop talking about his excitement to meet his first grandchild and though Christian said nothing, he realised how much Raymond was relying more and more on him, barely intervening in some cases, where he would have given his input a few years ago.

It was clear to Christian that Raymond was planning on retiring early to appreciate his grandchildren in a way he hadn't had with his own children. He had asked Ana how her father had raised her, how present he was, what she would like to change for their own children, and no matter how much Raymond loved his children, he had missed several key moments that Christian would make sure he wouldn't miss.

Which was why he had had a conversation with Ryan the day that followed his return from his honeymoon and explained to the man that he expected of him to be at the same level as him. They would each train someone to be their second, but there wouldn't really a Boss, more like a unity.

Of course, Ryan had to make a big deal out of it, claiming that this was the best proof of trust Christian could have ever gotten him and that he would be proud to be his brother in arm, the person he trusted most to make their little organisation prosper by his side.

"Oh, Dad, good you're here. I wanted to ask you about something."

"I'm all ears sweetheart."

"I wanted to know if you could go to your hotel for a couple of weeks. I want to change a few things around the house, and it would be easier if none of us is here," Ana explained as Raymond washed his hands.

Christian carefully watched his mentor glance in his direction, probably wondering if the idea came from him before he granted Ana her wish. She had been talking to him about wanting to change a few things in the mansion before the baby would arrive, and Christian simply let her do her thing, just like he did back in the days when she started decorating his apartment. As long as he had a bed to sleep in, and a fridge with food in it, Christian was not picky.

He half-listened to Raymond and Ana discuss where she was planning to put the nursery, along with other rearrangements, and easily got distracted when he saw Bastille jump on something in the garden. He watched the cat fight something for a little while, before the feline proudly looked up, obviously having killed whatever small animal that had dared come across Bastille's territory.

He got up and went to the garden, mostly to make sure that the cat wouldn't bring its game inside to eat it because he knew how much it grossed Ana out. Bastille showed a dead bird to Christian and purred when Christian petted his head to congratulate him, glad that Ana was inside. It was just a small bird, Christian actually doubted the frail thing could fly, and Ana would definitely be upset by the natural circle of life.

He looked around, trying to spot the nest in the dark as his mind wandered to the easiness with which Raymond and he had gotten used to one another. None of them ever mentioned the couple very active (and not so discreet) sexual life. Christian didn't care much, because he had married the girl, and both of them being in their prime, it was expected of them. Moreover, the male in him liked that Ana had very little control when it came to her libido and that she often forgot to be quiet.

Not that it mattered. The mansion was humongous, and Ana's room was literally at the opposite of Raymond's. She could scream at the top her lungs, but Christian doubted Raymond could hear them. Of course, Ana was convinced of the opposite, and that what was making it fun for him. He loved how she always tried to bite her tongue, he loved watching her trying to keep quiet, and ultimately fail when he would rotate his hips a certain way, or touch her at a certain spot.

"You still have a lot to learn to surprise me like that, Ryan," He suddenly said with a smirk, not even bothering to turn around to see the dark-skinned man tiptoe his way to him.

It always amused to see that Ryan kept on trying to sneak up on him when he knew where he was coming from. After all, Christian came from the gutter and learnt to steal from a young age. He was still a teenager that he could pass through most security systems. In fact, he had always been tempted to dance with danger and try to sneak in the White House. But now that he was married, expecting a kid, this was a question that would never be answered.

"You know, Christian, sometimes, you could try to humour people, and pretend that we manage to surprise you," Ryan moodily said, coming to stand next to Christian, only to see Bastille happily devour his prey.

He made a face of disgust, which made Christian roll his eyes. He couldn't understand why people were so grossed out at this natural thing. Especially people like Ryan who had already seen their fair share of blood.

"Anyway, I've heard you had your first visit."

"I had."

"In that case, my gift is not irrelevant," Ryan said, giving Christian a long box. The copper-haired man frowned, hoping that it wasn't one of Ryan's prank, nor a tie, given the shape of the box.

He took the gift, and opened the box, only to find a stethoscope in it. He rose his eyebrow at his friend, not seeing the correlation, and Ryan explained,

"So you can listen to your kid. I know how it feels to hear the first heartbeat, and we're not like them. They will get to experience things we will never have. But at least, now you don't have to wait to go to the doctor to hear your kid."

Christian genuinely smiled, surprised that he did not think of this solution himself. Ever since they had heard the heartbeat, he had been obsessed with Ana getting further in her pregnancy so they could go to the doctor again. He even had the little picture the doctor gave them in his wallet, next to the one he had of Ana, always with him. She called him a sweet romantic to do so, and of course, he shook his head at her, because once again, those were things he only did for her.

"Thanks, man. I appreciate the thought," Christian said, his voice as neutral as usual.

The two of them walked back inside, avoiding talking about business. This was a rule that Christian had imposed on anyone coming to the mansion. Business talks were for the gate, or the office, nowhere else. And he knew that Ana appreciated that. She did stay with him in the office a couple of times when Ryan and he had been talking about different strategies, but that was all on her.

As they walked into the dining room, he saw with no surprise that little Brian was in Ana's arms, telling her a story about this friend he made in the playground. Though he was Christian's Godson, Brian _adored_ Ana. He liked Christian and played with him, but if there was a choice between the man and the brunette, Ana would always win.

"So, did you start thinking of names?" Raymond asked, more for Christian than for Ana since she was still listening to little Brian's story.

Still, Christian saw how she briefly tensed, glancing in his direction before refocusing her attention on the child. They had not talked about that Michael issue since their honeymoon, and no matter how much he knew she was dying to know what happened to her brother, Christian simply refused to tell her. It wasn't much that he wanted to preserve the way she perceived her brother, but more that she was trying to protect her relationship with her father.

He was sure that she would forgive her father, especially if she knew what Michael had been trying to do, but it would put a string on their relationship, and Christian knew Ana loved her father too much to put herself trough that if she had a choice.

"I just want to put out there that Ryan goes both for male or female," Ryan teasingly said, making Christian roll his eyes, though he was surprised when Ana added,

"So does Ray."

"Don't do that. Sharing a name is so much weight on such little shoulders. Especially since my grandkid is already going to be a Steele. Don't curse the child, sweetheart," Raymond argued, clearly not wanting his name to be passed on this way.

"You know, all that matters is that the kid inherits Ana's sense of humour, because I just can't picture Christian's smile on a child's face … or on his face," Ryan joked, making everyone laugh including little Brian who didn't want to be the only not laughing around the table.

Christian rolled his eyes, untouched by the jab, and the conversation kept on going as they ate, many jokes aimed at him and his 'inability to show empathy'. This was their dinner parties usually went, whether it was Ryan, Mia or Jose, they would make sure to always make a joke about Christian and his usual stoic facade, probably to diffuse the atmosphere, especially when Katherine and Elliott were involved.

Though he had always been polite with Ana's friend, Christian had never really connected with her or even tried, and even if Ana never said a word about it, he was sure that the blonde did make a few remarks about it. He knew that she would never try to break them apart, but she was probably baffled by the fact that he always remained so impassible.

At some point, Suzie directed the conversation toward another topic than him, though Christian would have rather have Ryan picking on him than talking about that other person. The thing was, Ana had been supposed to go to India shortly after their honeymoon to see how the school she was building was going. It wasn't really the issue. The issue was _James_.

James was Ana's latest friend, and Christian simply didn't like him. Even though James had always been a gentleman, and never made a move on Ana, Christian didn't like him. He was too … touchy, too bubbly, too in touch with Ana and her charities. Before he left for India, Christian often found the young man in his apartment with Ana planning their perfect charity. In fact, more than once James showed up unannounced and Christian had to suffer him through dinner.

And though he knew his jealousy of James was irrational, that Ana loved him and would never cheat on him, he still despised the guy. But he took it on himself because none of them had ever done anything to warrant this jealousy. He trusted Ana, and his feelings regarding another person would change that trust. Especially when Ana had asked a couple of times if he minded James. He couldn't decently ban the man from their lives when everything that the man did was the same as her other friends. It was just ... irrational.

He trusted Ana with his heart and knew she wouldn't deceive him.

In the middle of dessert, after Brian had been put to sleep in one of the guest rooms, Gail came to shyly announce that there was someone at the gate asking for Christian. With a kiss on his wife's lips, he got up and checked on the intercom who it was before he went back to the party and explained that he had to go.

Raymond and Ryan were unfazed, though Ryan asked if he needed him. He went to his room to take his gun and was unsurprised when he saw Ana by the door. She looked at him, expecting an answer, because he had never bailed when she had friends coming over, and always waited for them to leave.

"I can't postpone this babe. I have to go."

"Where?"

"Deal with some punk."

"With _Gia_?" Christian looked at her with surprise, because he hadn't told anyone who was at the gate, and she explained, crossing her arms over her chest, "I asked Gail who was at the gate and she said it was an Asian blonde."

Christian smiled with love at his wife and took her in his arms, giving her a comforting hug before kissing her lips and leaving with those words, "I know you don't like Gia, babe, but as I told you before, she doesn't matter. It's me you should trust."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**BTW, where are you guys from, I am curious? I am currently living in the everso rainy UK**

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**💚 See? I didn't kill Bastille, just a little innocent baby bird that should have learned to fly quicker, haha. And there are no cliffies.**

**💚Concerning the last chapter, I didn't want to go full-on wedding, but I still wanted to include a few scenes. Also, it was just plain sweet, because well ... they were on their honeymoon, there is literally a word for it! Haha. And sometimes, the sweetness can be nice ... sometimes.**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was between Gail being scared out of her life, and the heartbeat ...**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	80. Chapter 11: Everytime

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

💚**So, this is an update that needs reminding that the story is rated M, and not just for the lemons. So this is a trigger warning **

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 11****: **** Everytime ~ by Britney Spears (3,5K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana briefly glanced at her husband as the doctor announced them that she was carrying a baby boy. She saw how his smile widened even more, before she looked at the screen, trying to see herself how the good doctor could tell that her baby was a boy.

Once again, the ob-gyn left them alone for a time, saying that he would print pictures of the ultrasound for them, and after she wiped the gel off her stomach, Christian placed his hand on it, kissing her with love. Though she could feel the baby moving inside of her, Christian hadn't had the pleasure yet, and she knew he was yearning for the sensation.

"Happy?" She asked him, with a bit of play in her tone, and he rolled his eyes at her.

"I think that's an understatement."

"I mean, happy that it's a boy."

"I wouldn't have minded, either way, babe. But I guess I _am _indeed glad that we're getting a son first."

"I'm still going to take him to Broadway, and he better know the lyrics."

"I wasn't expecting any less from you."

She smiled and kissed him again, loving the way Christian managed to make her feel. It was something that she had confessed to both Kate and Mia when she started going further in her pregnancy, she was concerned that as soon as she would be pregnant, Christian would only see her as such. _A baby maker_. She had a couple of acquaintances who had gone through that and given Christian's passion for becoming a father, she had been afraid of that possibility.

But Christian's touch and love never changed since she got pregnant. Sure, he was definitely more in control during their lovemaking, and she was pretty sure that as long as she would be pregnant, she could forget about the rougher side of their sex life. But that sweet Christian she fell in love with had been present all the way. He obviously loved the idea of becoming a father, and never shied away from showing it to her, but it had never been to the expense of his love for her.

After their doctor appointment, Christian insisted on dropping her off to the restaurant where she was meeting her friends, under the pretext to spend a bit more time with her. But she knew that Dr Johnson had him worried, just as much as her. He was concerned about her placenta and had scheduled more visits for her. And though she did not have a mother to compare the experience with, she knew from Kate's pregnancy that those extra appointments meant that her pregnancy was not as easy as she thought it would be.

Because she had had such a wonderful first trimester with barely any inconveniences of pregnancy, Ana had hoped that her first miscarriage had just been bad luck. But it seemed that the doctor was not agreeing with that. She still hadn't told Christian about the miscarriage, and therefore it was complicated to ask the doctor if her chances were high. No matter how busy he was, no matter where he was, Christian always made sure to be with her at each of her visits to the doctor.

She didn't know why she wouldn't tell Christian. Especially when Father Crowley had made it his leitmotiv to get her to tell her husband. He even subtly included it in one of his Sunday sermons. She just … didn't want to bring bad memories, for him or for her. It had been a painful time in her life, and she was so grateful that Mia had been there for her, but she couldn't imagine what Christian would do.

He didn't like talking about their breakup, and especially what happened in that period of time. Sure they had a heart to heart conversation, where they honestly told each other how they tried to move on from the other, but he always did his best to avoid the topic afterwards. It was something painful to him, and a couple of times, Ana had been tempted to talk to her father about it.

After all, Raymond Steele still loved her mother, almost twenty years after her death, and more than once, Ana found herself comparing Christian to her father when it came to love. Especially when Elena would tell her how Raymond used to be with Carla. She wanted to ask her father why he never remarried, or even tried to simply find another girl, but … it was a difficult topic and she didn't want to upset her father.

So, she kept for herself the loss of Christian's and her first baby, feeling in a way that this burden was a punishment for her breaking up with a man who clumsily loved her. It wasn't like they could change anything now anyway, especially since they had a future to look forward to.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

With pride, Ana watched the nursery that she had just finished decorating, and she happily smiled seeing it as she had pictured it. It was the one room that she had insisted on doing herself when she redecorated the whole house because she wanted to be a good and capable mother from the start. This was something that Christian had some problems coming around, and he would often call her on that, saying that she wasn't defined by her new status of a new mother, but just as herself, But no matter how many arguments he would bring to the table, Ana was still set on being the best mother there could be so she could be the best version of herself.

Moreover, she was sure that he would change his narrative once the baby would be born. Just like she had insisted on doing the room herself, Christian had insisted on building the pieces of furniture with her. The two of them actually had a lot of fun together in this very room, though Christian always made a point to keep the heat to their room, next door. The nursery had two doors, one leading to the rest of the house, and once connecting it to their own bedroom, so she could be close to their child. She figured that as long as their son would be a toddler, he would sleep in there, and afterwards, he would have his own room separated from theirs.

For a while, she pondered in giving to their first child Mike's room, but she felt that, even though he did not know which room it was, Christian would not appreciate having his child in her late brother's room. In fact, she had tried a few more times to put Mike, and different variants of the name back on the table, but Christian kept stubbornly refusing to call their son Mike, or anything resembling it.

She sighed and closed the door of the nursery, excited that in a few months time she would get to put her baby to sleep in it, and she went to Mike's old room, where there were so many papers piled up for redistribution. During the whole redecoration of the house, she had stored any sort of important papers there, because she knew she was going to change his room into her own office. After all, even after she would have given birth, she still wanted to her with her charities, and she wanted a place where she could discuss matters with anyone involved.

She sat on the floor, mostly because she oddly found it more and more comfortable as she was getting bigger and bigger, despite the fact that it was getting harder and harder to get up; and she started organising her papers. She had been at it for a good hour when she stumbled upon a box that was not named after her. She hesitated for a moment, because, even though he was dead, it was still violating his privacy, but nostalgia got the better of her.

She opened the box and smiled when the first thing she found was a picture of herself alongside the three Kavanagh children. The picture had been taken during one of their Spring breaks, shortly after Mike's disappearance. They had gone to Mexico, and she had convinced them to visit one of the ancient pyramids. She smiled with nostalgia and took the picture out of the box, to make sure she could frame it later and put it in the library.

She snooped in the box, hoping to find more lost pictures when her eyes caught a glimpse of a medical stamp, which made her frown. As far as she recalled, Eric had always been as healthy as a horse. She took the paper out, and as she read it, she could feel colours escaping her face.

No matter what might have happened, her Godfather would have died. She had forgiven Christian a long time ago for his death, she would have never agreed to marry him otherwise, but now, she felt that it was never something for her to forgive. She remembered that Eric had always been a proud man and that dying from a disease eating him from the inside would have been something extremely humiliating for him. So, what if, Christian had pulled the trigger on her Godfather as an act of mercy?

She numbly closed the box, and stared at her phone, debating if she should call her husband now to confront him about it. She knew that, no matter what, he wouldn't lie to her. But Christian was a master at eluding questions, and she had learnt to read his facial expressions when he did so. If she talked to him over the phone, she wouldn't be able to tell.

So she simply put the box away and went to the dining room to join her father for dinner. Christian was away for the weekend, settling some affairs in Columbia, which made him already pissed enough. He hadn't been supposed to go but had to at the last second because there was no one he trusted available to do so.

She ate with her father, who was still over the moon about his upcoming grandchild. If Christian and she made the nursery, Raymond was the one who filled it. There was not a single day when he did not come back home with something new for the kid. And ever since he learnt that she was expecting a boy, a week ago, he had targeted his purchases even more. And Ana was far from complaining, she had been spoiled by her grandparents growing up, and she didn't expect any less from her father for her own children.

It was only in the middle of dessert that Ana found herself questioning her father about his life, even though she had never done it before. She wasn't sure why she did it, maybe it was her hormones, or maybe it was because, though they never said it out loud, the fact that she had married Christian had made them acknowledge that they were both very well aware of what Raymond did in the dead of the night. Still, she asked,

"Dad? Do you remember when I asked you if you knew who killed Uncle Eric?"

Raymond carefully put down his spoon, dismissing Gail and her coffee without even looking at her. His eyes were solely on his daughter, assessing her face as his own body language recoiled. After all, though they never discussed it, they both knew that she knew exactly who was responsible behind the death of her Godfather

"Yes?"

"Do you know _why_ he was killed?"

"Where is this coming from?"

Biting down on her lips, Ana took the paper out of her pocket and slipped it in the direction of her father. He did not take it as she had expected him to, simply looking at it before bringing his eyes back to her, and she explained her thoughts,

"When I asked you, you said that his death was what was best for everyone, including him. And … well …"

"You were not meant to see that, sweetheart," Raymond finally spoke, love in his voice, though Ana was sure that she could hear concern as well. He reached for her hand, squeezing it a little as he added, "Yes, Eric knew he was sick, and he did what he did for his own reasons. Don't let that piece of paper change the way you see him."

Those were almost words for words what Christian had told her when she had confronted him about him killing her Godfather. He had said that she shouldn't let his actions and his feelings toward the man change the way she felt about the deceased.

"So Christian knew all along," She let out in a whisper, more to herself than for her father. He scoffed,

"I sincerely doubt that."

She turned her head to her father, surprised that he would be so sure of himself, and he explained, "Christian is … not someone who believes in mercy, or pity. His reasons were … justified, in his eyes. And Eric did everything to lead Christian on the path he is now."

"Did he set Christian up for him to kill him?! Why would he do that?"

"Because he wanted a clean death and I wanted someone I could trust."

Ana shook her head looking down on her knees. They had gone further than ever in this conversation and she did not like it one bit. She wished she had never found this cursed piece of paper.

"Dad … you can't talk about trust when your whole relationship with Christian is based on a lie."

"I have never lied to Christian. I just … omitted to reveal certain facts that I was aware of. If he is to come and ask me, I will tell him, but as long as he doesn't ask …"

"But Dad, Christian … he doesn't react well to people going behind his back."

"Believe me, I know, sweetheart. And I will never ask you to lie to your husband. What you want to tell him is up to you. Whatever Christian has coming my way, I am prepared."

Ana looked at the paper, feeling a sudden sense of relief for not having called Christian earlier. This was not something she wanted to share with Christian. Not much for her late Godfather's sake, but because she knew Christian could hold a grudge. If he learnt that his whole relationship with Raymond was built on a setup, he might severe all ties with the man, and she would be caught in the middle.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

Two nights after her discovery, Ana was peacefully sleeping in her room, when she heard Christian coming home. She briefly checked the time, seeing that it was late in the night, or early in the morning, and went back to sleep, knowing that Christian would not be in bed for a while since he always took a shower before joining her.

This was one of the side effects of her pregnancy, she had a much lighter sleep than she used to. She blamed it all on the baby who always waited for her to lay down to start dancing the tango in her belly, making it more difficult for her to have peaceful nights. Though it was the only real downside of her pregnancy. Elena had bought her one of those long pillows, and she had to admit that it strangely did help, though her son still partied every night as if her womb was a club.

"Oh, _shit_!" Christian suddenly exclaimed, tearing her out of her slumber, and she promptly switched on the light of her nightstand.

He was in bed, next to her and holding her, but she was stunned by his swearing. She had heard Christian swear many times, but he usually refrained from doing so in her presence. The only times he swore at her were that one time when he had been very angry at her for inviting his parents without telling her, and when they would get rough in bed.

So there was no reason for Christian to swear, or even to wake her up like that in the middle of the night. Especially not with that happy and giddy face. His eyes were looking at her, sparkling with wonder and anticipation, and before she could ask what was wrong, he said with glee,

_"The baby kicked!_"

She rolled her eyes, half of her brain still foggy with sleep, and she reached to switch off the light as she told him with a blasé tone,

"Yeah, I know. He loves to dance the samba when I want to sleep."

"No. I _felt_ him kick."

"Oh!"

Finally, she caught up with his happiness, only registering now that his hand had never left her stomach ever since she woke up. The two of them looked down, hoping to have another sign of life, but it seemed that they had a shy boy who did not like being in the spotlight.

Ana returned her attention to her husband, noticing how obviously tired he was, and as he kept on smiling to her, she suddenly felt overwhelmed by his love. Without much of a warning, she straddled him and passionately kiss him. He eagerly reciprocated, losing his hand in her hair. Her hand went between them, to see if he was as ready as she was, and when she felt that he was, she impaled herself on him, wincing a little when he struggled a little to get in.

Their lovemaking was fast, though passionate, with the only words uttered being how much they loved each other. As they tried to recover their breath, Ana kissed her husband before turning so she could collapse back on the bed. Christian laid beside her, a lazy smile on his lips as his fingers caressed her skin.

"I love coming back from a business trip."

"I love when you come back, period."

He chuckled, shaking his head before pecking her lips, "Babe, you'll have to put that to the past. I've always come back since."

"I know, but still."

She closed her eyes, appreciating the touch of his fingers on her sensitive skin ad as she started drifting back to sleep, she asked,

"You know how you want me to trust you to know best if I want to know something or not. I was wondering if that was going both ways?"

"Why? What don't you want to tell me?"

She kept her eyes closed because she knew he was looking at her, and she felt that she would probably give in if she met his eyes. But she didn't want to sever the bond between her father and Christian, and there were no reasons why Christian should know in the first place.

"I could tell you, but I don't think it's necessary. So I'm hoping you will trust me enough to let it go, and not be mad at me if you find out somehow."

For the longest time, Christian remained silent, until she had no other choice than to open her eyes and meet his grey orbs. He searched her soul, making her feel like she was on trial for every little thing she had ever done wrong in her life, and finally, he said,

"Are you _sure_ I don't need to know?"

"Positive. I would tell you otherwise."

"Then, of course, I trust you."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

The next day, she went out shopping with Elena and Kate, the two of them getting quite excited about throwing her a baby shower. In all honesty, though Ana had always loved receiving gifts, she wasn't so sure about a baby shower. She didn't really like the idea of excluding half of her friends because they were guys.

All throughout lunch, Elena planned the perfect shower, with a theme she was sure Ana would love, but Ana was only half paying attention. She was tired because she hadn't been able to go to sleep after Christian had come home, their son having decided to party when Christian had fallen asleep. And has had a stomachache all morning.

"Are you alright, Ana? You look very pale," Elena asked her, looking at her with worry and reaching to touch her forehead like she had done all her life.

"I think I'm just going to go home and rest a bit. I didn't get much sleep last night."

"You don't look so well. Let me drive you home. Have you eaten or drunk something unusual?"

"No. I'm just … tired?"

She wasn't sure herself. They left the restaurant, Ana worriedly wondering to herself if she shouldn't go to the doctor instead of home, especially when her stomach pains started being stronger, and as she opened the door of the mall, she bumped into a man, making her lose her balance. The last thing she heard was the man apologising as he reached for her and she fell into oblivion.

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** What did you think? They are expecting a baby boy ... **

💚**And, Ana and her dad had a rather open conversation about his dirty life ... What do you think of her decision to keep it from Christian?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was the oh Shit, haha**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	81. Chapter 11: Like You

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚TRIGGER WARNING: ****So, this is an update that needs reminding that the story is rated M, and not just for the lemons. As I said before, this story has dark themes, and it not my intentions to hurt anyone's feelings. I know that some of you may take this personally because of experience, and I have no wish to remind people of bad memories. So, this is just a fair warning for you to beware.**

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 11****: **** Like You ~ by Evanescence (7,0K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

When Ana regained consciousness, she was in a hospital, and even before opening her eyes, she knew what was wrong with her. She sat up, feeling her sorrow come over her like the tide over the shore, and when she instinctively brought her hand to her rounded belly, she burst into tears.

_She would never get to hold her baby_.

It seemed that she was on her own forever, crying the loss of her child before anyone could even confirm the news to her. She wished she hadn't so easily dismissed her dizziness in the morning She wondered if this could have saved her baby before it was too late.

With a sob, she looked around, seeing nothing but the white, aseptic walls of the hospital. She wished there was someone by her side, so she wouldn't be alone, but she guessed that Elena and Kate were probably not allowed by her bed since they were not immediate family. Her father had left for Mexico a couple of days ago, and Christian had told her that morning that he would be busy all day long.

As the tears kept on silently rolling on her cheeks, she took notice of the spaciousness of the room, giving her the certainty that she was in a private room. She hoped that the hospital would be lenient and let her leave this cursed place soon. She had no intention of staying here, and she only longed to be back in her home, where she would be able to find comfort in the comforting embrace of her husband.

Salty pearls kept escaping her eyes when a doctor finally came in, and though she knew nothing was his fault, she hated him as soon as she saw him. He had the fake empathy displayed on his face that doctors developed over the years after witnessing too much sadness and loss, and she wanted none of it. All she wanted was to be home, in her bed, with no one but Christian and his soothing words.

As she thought of that, before the doctor could even say a word, she let out a choking sob, realising that Christian would be even more devastated than her. She had already experienced the sorrow of losing a child, he hadn't; and he had wanted to be a father for so long. No one had been happier than him to learn that she was pregnant. She had seen first hand how he would sometimes smile at her in a way he had never before because it was the father in him smiling to the mother in her.

_And now, he was no longer a father to be_.

"Mrs Steele, your husband is outside. Shall I bring him in?"

She eagerly nodded, a part of her more surprised by the fact that Christian had not forgone the doctor's orders to already be by her side, than by the fact that he was already here. She watched the doctor open the door to let her husband in, and as soon as he was in that ghastly white room, he walked over to her, his grey eyes full of hurt, compassion and sorrow.

She quickly wiped her tears, Christian's presence making her feel slightly better, and the good doctor started explaining the cause of her miscarriage. Her fall had nothing to do with her baby's death, Dr Singh reckoned that her pains of the morning were symptoms that the baby was dead already. He explained that she suffered from a placental abruption and that no matter how hard it was for them to lose a child so far along in their pregnancy, they shouldn't despair since there were no sequelae left in her uterus.

And then, the doctor said something that changed the atmosphere in the room. Though Christian hadn't said a word, nor moved a muscle, he just simply remained, standing by her side and listening to anything Dr Singh said. But Ana knew that he and she were sharing their loss together. But when the medicine man opened his mouth again, a sudden inexplicable coldness wrapped around Ana. She glanced at Christian who was still listening to the doctor, but she knew there was something about him that had changed.

"However, I think you should make that your next pregnancy is closely followed. I would recommend seeing your ob-gyn as often as possible and reduce to the maximum any foods and activities that could endanger that next pregnancy. I am not saying that to alarm you, but someone as young and healthy as you shouldn't have had two consecutive miscarriages like that.

Though I said there were no sequelae, it does leave bruises on your uterus, and your heart. The more you miscarry, the more you think about it, the more you are prone to miscarry. If we could avoid a third one, it would be better for everyone."

Ana nodded, tears streaming down her face again. She felt useless. Women had been bearing children for millions of years, and she couldn't do that one simple thing. She had always wanted to be a mom, fantasising about how she would give the best of herself to her children, how she would give all her love, and now, she was denied that simple thing. Childbirth was the one thing that had defined women for millenniums, and she couldn't even do it. If she had been born not even a century earlier, she would have been shunned by society's standards.

She didn't even realise that the doctor was gone, coming back to reality when Christian moved to sit in a chair by the side of her bed. She watched with shock as her husband put an obvious distance between them instead of giving her that loving and comforting embrace she longed for.

"Christian?" She hiccuped, though it did not earn the response she had been hoping for.

Christian turned his head to her, his eyes never meeting hers as he waited for her to say something, and for the first time in their relationship, for the first time since their first getaway to Japan, Ana felt like a nobody in Christian's eyes. He was giving her as much attention as he gave a random person. She felt like she meant nothing to him.

Her sobs grew louder, but she was interrupted from saying anything by Elena and Kate rushing into the room, worried out of their minds. Elena rushed to her bed and did what Christian should have done, she gave her the comforting hug she needed, so she would know she was not alone.

"Sweetie, everything is going to be okay. It happens," she reassured the young brunette, kissing her forehead in gathering her in a motherly embrace. Ana shook her head in denial, crying her heart out in Elena's arms. She wasn't only crying the loss of her child, she was crying because of the coldness the man she loved had towards her.

"You will have your beautiful children that I will get to spoil. Miscarriages mean nothing. I had one before each of my kids, and yet, here they are, bugging me for the most ridiculous things."

Ana smiled at the attempt her Godmother had to lighten the mood, though she was surprised by this confession. She never knew that Elena had struggled to have children like she was at the moment. She glanced at her best friend who seemed as surprised as her at this new piece of information.

"We should get going. Mia is here, and they won't allow too many visitors at a time," Elena explained, hugging Ana once again, and as she did so, Ana saw how Kate was frowning at the distance between Christian and her. After all, more than once had she assured her best friend that Christian loved her beyond words and that he was different behind closed doors, and yet, at this moment when she needed him the most, he was being distant.

When Elena and Kate opened the door to leave, Christian finally opened his mouth for the first time since he got in the room, "Could you describe him to me?"

Elena paused for a moment, looking on the floor, her eyes lost in a memory before she looked straight in Christian's eyes, and told him, "I could, but what's the point? Going down that road won't bring back your child."

He did not say a word, nor even moved a muscle to acknowledge her answer, and Ana couldn't shake this horrible feeling that she understood a bit too well what Christian wanted to do. But she clung to the hope that her godmother's words would be enough to keep her husband steady.

Mia came into the room with a box of chocolate, and sat on the edge of Ana's bed, after giving her a big hug. As she opened the chocolates more to occupy her hands than because she wanted to, she saw from the corner of her eyes how Mia was obviously having a silent conversation with Christian through their eyes. But when Christian glared at her with a look that could kill, Mia got up so she could sit on the other side of the bed, and turn her back to Christian with ostentation.

Then, she looked at Ana with compassion and told her, with a friendly but timid smile, "I bought that box because some of them have liquor on it."

Ana gave her back her smile, liking that Mia's words weren't full of painful hope and bullshit. She was just trying to make her see the upside of that terrible situation. And moreover, though Ana didn't say a word, the fact that she had obviously picked her side in whatever feud she had just had with Christian, warmed her heart. She had never felt threatened by the relationship Christian and Mia had together after she had learnt what they were really about. In fact, in her heart to heart, she was sure that the two of them considered each other as siblings. And yet, though Ana knew that Mia loved Christian more than her, and though she knew that Mia valued Christian's opinion more than hers, Mia still took her side.

Mia stayed for half an hour, talking about anything but the reason why Ana was in a hospital bed. She talked about an ice-cream night at her place, just the two of them, like old times, she talked about school, she talked about Ana's charities, and finally, she let Ana know that she had called her priest because she felt that Ana's religious mind would be more at peace if she could talk to her spiritual guide.

Which was why when she left, with the promise of a girls night around ice-cream pints, Father Crowley came in after her, sitting on her bed exactly where Mia had been sitting first. With gentleness and compassion, he took her hand and waited for her to start talking, but Ana simply shook her head and looked down. She didn't feel like listening to a sermon when twice she had been denied the joy of a child.

"Ana … Do not despair. You will have your chance to be a mother," He assured her, and once again she shook her head, refusing to listen to his words of hope when all she was feeling was loss and despair.

"God only tests the bravest souls. He would not put this burden on you if he didn't think you could endure it."

"Or maybe He thinks I'm not fit to be a mother!" she snapped. Maybe, despite all her well-wishing and her good intentions, the Higher Power knew better than to put in her hands the life of an innocent child.

"You and I both know that this isn't true. I know that you're sad and angry now, but remember what I told you last time. The best rewards come after the hardest tests."

She snarled, not seeing the wisdom in his words. She already had a miscarriage, so she was supposed to go through this pregnancy unscathed if she was following his logic. With a pointed look, Father Crowley asked to look deep within her,

"Think, Ana. Think of the dark place you were in the last time. Has anything brought you immense pleasure since then?"

She didn't say a word as she understood that he meant Christian. After her first miscarriage, she had cried so much, and she had confessed to the good Father that she wished Christian had been by her side. And now, she had married the man she loved, the man she kept on loving during the two years of their separation, even though she had tried to forget him. The man who was sitting by her bed now, looking at her and the religious man, not saying a word nor showing a single expression.

"Maybe … but I feel that this time, I'm losing more than I'm gaining," She whispered, hoping that only Father Crowley heard her.

The good man gently squeezed her hand, briefly glancing to the ever so stoic Christian who was looking back straight in the eyes of the religious man, a fire burning in his silver orbs.

"Don't despair, my child. Life has a funny way of doing things for the better. If you feel that a door closes on you, it's because a better one opened for you."

And on these words, he kissed her forehead and left the couple alone. For an hour, neither Ana nor Christian spoke, both lost in their thoughts and unable to talk due to the cold silence Christian was imposing on them. She wished that he would simply take her in his arms, even though he didn't want to talk, but when she decided to get up and go to him, she noticed the way he was grabbing the arms of his chair. His knuckles were white for he was holding the arms so tight, and it refrained her from any attempt of getting closer to him.

She was tired, and though she wanted to sleep again, she didn't want to do it without hearing a single word from her husband.

"Christian?" She waited for him to acknowledge her, but once again, he simply turned his head, not looking at her in the eyes. So she laid on the bed, turning her back to him because she didn't want him to see her crying even more, and she let him know between two sobs,

"I'm sorry for the baby."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana woke up with her head pounding and her heart aching. She struggled to open her eyes, her tears from the previous night having dried to salt and making it difficult for her to see the light of the day. Without great conviction or will, she sat up in the clinical bed that brought her so much sorrow, doing her best to hold the new tears coming her way as she remembered her sorrows of the previous day, and she glanced at the chair where her husband had been sitting the previous night, not saying a word and watching her cry herself to sleep.

A lump grew in her throat when she found it empty, without any note for her to assure her that he would be back soon. She was alone. All alone once more, because she wasn't strong enough. At this moment, she would have given anything to be anyone else, to never had experienced this pain. She would rather be a poor girl without a penny to her name, she would rather be a suburban wife with bills and mortgages drowning her, she would rater be a naked Amazonian who knew nothing of the modern society and thought of planes as metal birds than be herself.

This was the second time she had to go through this pain, and it was even worse than the first time. This time she had hope, and it had been snatched away from her at the cruellest of time.

She curled on herself, crying over herself and wondering what was wrong with her. Why couldn't she be like everybody else? Why, of all the things, _this was _what was denied to her? And why did she have to go through this alone once again?

She was married! Her husband was supposed to love her, through sickness and health! But he wasn't here. He didn't even hold her last night. He let her cry on her own, though there was more than enough space on that ridiculously large and soulless bed. He went back to his own life and left her all alone in the morning as if nothing happened.

Did he expect her to smile at him when she would see him again? Did he plan to pretend that nothing ever happened? _Did he even care_? She knew he loved her, but maybe the recent developments of their situation made him reevaluate that statement and think he would be better off without her. Maybe he wanted someone _normal_, after all.

As she kept on crying her heart out, her thoughts getting darker and darker by the minute, the door to her room opened, and revealed her father, with a pained expression on his face. He had been away for the last couple of days, and she tried to smile, because, despite her sorrows, she was happy to see him, but she never managed to turn her lips in the proper curve.

"Oh, sweetheart," Raymond said, walking to his daughter, and taking her in his arms as soon as she was at arm's length.

Ana burst into loud tears, sobbing in her father's comforting embrace, not caring that she was not a child anymore and simply crying her heart out to the man who had always been there for her, for as long as she could remember.

Raymond held her for as long as her tears streamed down her face, soothing her with calm and sweet words, just like he did when she was younger. She didn't need to tell him how much she was in pain, how much she was hurting, he already knew, because all her life, he had always been the one person there for her, through the ups and the downs, the one person who would go to the moon and back just to put a smile on her face.

When she finally called down, he gave her a tissue to wipe away her tears, and though he put a more reasonable distance between them, he did not move far from her. With love and compassion, he tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, and she glanced at the chair that her husband had left empty, asking her beloved father,

"Have you seen Christian?"

"Yes. I saw him just before getting into your room. He's the one who called me and told me to come back home, even though Elena tried to call me a couple of hours later."

"So … he's just getting coffee?" She suggested though she knew she was being delusional.

First of all, Christian did not drink coffee, and she doubted he would ever settle for the insipid tea of the hospital. Second, Christian had made sure that she would not be alone by calling her father, which meant that he had no intention of being by her side. But still, she let that flicker of hope light up her heart.

Raymond looked at his daughter with empathy, and though he did not say a word, Ana could tell that her father knew exactly where Christian was, and what he was doing. And so she demanded, fear now freezing her insides,

"Don't sugarcoat, Dad! _Has Christian left our home_?!"

"_No_!" He hurriedly assured her. "Of course not, sweetheart. It's just … Christian is a man who doesn't like to be overwhelmed by emotions. And I think that, right now, he is dealing with your loss and the emotions it arises in him, by exerting revenge. This is what he knows, and this is how he deals with things."

Though Ana felt that she should understand the subtle innuendo her father was giving her, she had no idea what it meant and therefore had no idea of where Christian could be. She could only find a little comfort by knowing that he hadn't deserted her completely.

Maybe this was his way to deal with loss, maybe he needed to be by himself. She had always needed to be surrounded by people when she had lost someone, but she knew that not everyone was the same. When Kate had lost her paternal grandmother, she had isolated herself for almost a month even from Elliott, whereas Ethan and Jake had found comfort in talking to her.

With sadness still clouding her heart, she looked around, hating how this room was making her feel like she was on her deathbed. She glanced yet again at the empty chair, willing it to produce her loving husband, before she came back to reason, and let her father know,

"I don't want to stay here Dad. I want to go home."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

**Ana's PoV**

It had been two days and two nights since she had last seen Christian. She wasn't even sure if he had come home when she was sleeping. The previous night, Raymond had given her a sleeping pill to help her have a dreamless night full of rest, and though it worked, it did not help with her worries in the morning.

She had tried to call Christian dozens of times, but his phone always rang until she had to leave a message, which had never happened before. Of course, when he was away, especially when he was abroad, she had to leave messages, or text him to call her back when he was free. But when he was in New York, no matter what he did, he always picked up when she called.

That simple act scared Ana much more than she cared to admit. She knew how much Christian wanted to be a father. She knew that it was something that he had been planning since before he even met her or her father. She knew how excited he had been about their pregnancy and the baby developing inside of her. And now, he had learnt that she wasn't able to give her that one thing that was supposed to be the most natural thing in their relationship.

Even though she hated thinking it, she was afraid that Christian felt like she was not good enough after all. Maybe he still loved her, but she wasn't all he needed. Christian wanted children and she wasn't able to give him that, to do what women have been doing since the dawn of time. Maybe he wanted to find another woman who could … Maybe he would cheat on her (_with Gia of all people_), or maybe even worse, he would divorce her to find himself a more suitable wife.

It was with those dark thoughts in mind that Ana stayed in her bedroom during the two days, refusing to go out when her father proposed for them to have lunch or dinner together. She stayed in her bed, cursing the cold emptiness of it, and crying more than she ever did in her whole life. She wasn't sure how she should feel. She was supposed to mourn for her child with her husband but said husband created another sorrow by abandoning her.

As she kept on crying, her heart calling Christian a liar as she remembered his wedding vows and him promising to stay by her side in _sickness and in health_, someone gently knocked on her door. She ignored it, recognising Gail's soft knock, and curled up in her bed even more. The door opened, and Gail got in with a generous tray containing a homemade soup, some cut fruits, several slices of bread and a glass of juice.

"You need to eat. Miss Ana," she pointedly said, putting the tray on the bed before sitting on the edge of it and giving the young brunette a sweet and compassionate smile.

Ana sat up on the bed, though she did not reach for the food on the tray, her red and puffy eyes lost in space. Gail reached for the young girl's hand and gently squeezed it before she said, "You'll get to try again. You're still young. Not everyone is lucky the first times around."

"What if my husband doesn't want to try again?" Ana let out, finally confessing to someone else what had been eating her up. Once again, Gail had a sweet smile for her, her hand squeezing hers once more as she wisely said,

"Men have different ways of showing their grief and sorrow. And often, they try to keep it from us because they want to appear weak. Mr Grey loves you, Miss Ana. One could even say that his love for you is the only thing that makes him human. I'm sure he's just trying to appear strong in front of you."

Ana's lips curled upward, though it was mainly to humour Gail. She was no fool, she knew that Christian scared more than one person and that he always appeared like a heartless and cold person to the rest of the world, Gail included. But that was the rest of the world. Christian had no issue showing his rawest emotions to her and only her.

She had seen pure fear for her on one of his birthdays when pictures of her had been taken. She had seen anger when she had tried to push him into meeting his parents. She had seen him cry when he heard the heartbeat of their son. She had been the one to whom he had opened his heart. So she knew that Christian would have no problems sharing his grief with her. If he wasn't here, it was because he was avoiding her for something else entirely.

Gail left, understanding that Ana was not in a mood to talk, and the brunette stayed alone for most of the day. She disregarded her phone, not wanting to feel hurt every time it would light up with a text or a phone call and it would not be Christian. When the sun started to set, she finally gathered herself up, and she went to the nursery, using the door connecting it to her and Christian's bedroom.

There, she blankly stared a the furniture, feeling more and more empty as she was realising that she would never get to hold her son in this room. She would never get to soothe his tummy ache on the rocking chair by the window. She would never get to tuck him in and put on the mobile in the bed that Christian had assembled for their child. She would never get to see her son in the clothes she had bought him.

With a heavy sigh, she opened a bag and started packing up the clothes she had pictured her son in, so she could donate them to charity. Even if Christian came back to her and they managed to have children, she didn't think she would be able to put those particular clothes on another baby without feeling sad each and every time.

She was still in the middle of emptying her baby's closet when someone knocked on the door and entered. And for the first time in a couple of days, Ana had a smile. Sure it wasn't a big one, and probably showed a lot of sadness, but seeing this particular face made her realise that some people had much worse problems in their life. She was getting worked up over nothing. The doctors had told her she could have other children, and Elena was apparently the living proof of that.

"I didn't know you were back already," She said, her voice slightly broken due to the amount of crying she had done over the past couple of days.

James smiled, though Ana could tell by the way he was looking at her that he knew of the sorrow she was going through. He leaned against the doorframe and waved a wrapped present as he gently told her,

"I came to give you my wedding gift since I wasn't here for your big day. And … I thought you could use a friend."

She took the present and unwrapped it, not without telling James to come further into the nursery; and a disabused chuckle escaped her mouth when she saw that he had gifted her with an edition of the Kamasutra, straight from India. She flipped through the pages, appreciating that it was written in Hindi, even though she couldn't read it, and feeling a pang in her heart at the possibility that Christian might not want to try those positions with her. _Where was he_?

"Thank you, James. That was very thoughtful. I just don't think I will use it now, though."

"Of course not. I even hesitated to bring it to you. I know it must be … Actually, no I don't. And I can't even begin to imagine."

Ana felt new tears building up in her eyes, surprised that she could still produce any, and in the blink of an eye, James was by her side, soothingly rubbing her arm as he assured her,

"It's going to be alright, Ana. You'll get through this. And if you need to talk, I am here for you."

She hesitated, and finally told him what has been weighing her heart, and what she had told anyone since the person she wanted to talk to the most wasn't here,

"What if there is something wrong with me? This is the second time I'm losing a bay, and I'm not even thirty? What if I can't ever have children? The doctors said I could try again in a few months, but they said the same the first time, and I still lost my baby. And this time, it was even worse. The last time I didn't even get the chance to get an ultrasound or anything, but this time, I heard his heart, I felt him kick, I knew he was a boy. I was already picking out names, for crying out loud."

She burst in tears, and James instinctively wrapped his arms around her, giving her comfort and showing her that indeed he was there for her. She cried, keeping for herself her worries about Christian, mostly because a part of her was hoping he just needed time to sort out whatever was going through his mind, and that he would come back to her afterwards.

But her sobs were interrupted by a loud clear of the throat by the door. James and she both craned their necks to see who was there, and relief washed through her when she saw her husband leaning against the doorframe. James broke their embrace under Christian's hard gaze, and never until that moment, the saying 'If looks could kill' had been truer to Ana.

For a moment, the three of them remained silent, before James nervously cleared his throat and hugged Ana goodbye, telling her that they would see each other around. She waved at him as he left, and returned her gaze on Christian who was carefully looking at the bags on the floor.

She noticed his bruised knuckles and the fact that stubble was growing on his chin, which he usually liked to keep shaven. But most of all, she noticed that his eyes were dead. Gone was that sparkle of love shining in his silver orbs when he would see her.

"I'm going to Chicago for a week. I just came to let you know."

"_What_? No! You can't go. We need to talk," She cried out, ignoring how much it hurt to hear him talk to her so casually as if she was just another person and not _his wife_. He snorted, a dark humourless smile spreading his lips, and asked,

"So _now_ you want to talk?"

"What is this supposed to mean? You're the one who's been missing since … since it happened."

"And yet, you had no problems finding someone else to talk to. Maybe I should call back your James so he can keep you company and you two can _talk_ some more."

"Christian …" She started, taking a step in his direction. However, she was stopped immediately, not daring say another word, or make another move, intimidated by the glare he gave her.

"You're always the one talking about trust, Ana. You're always the one asking me to open up about my past. And I do it. Because I love you. I let you bring my parents back in my life, even though every fibre of my body screamed not to. I've told you things that I've never told anyone. I confessed to you things I never even admitted to myself. I gave myself wholly to you, raw, without filters. Because I love you, and because I trusted you.

And what you did with my trust? You threw it back in my face! You may love me, but you never trusted me. You'd rather confide in the whole wide world than to confide in me, _your fucking husband_!"

"That's not true. I —."

"When were you going to tell me about your first miscarriage?!" He cut her off, anger blazing in his voice as he stepped closer inside the nursery.

She hiccuped, finally understanding why Christian had been so distant. It wasn't the grief like everyone thought, he was keeping her away from his anger, as he did all those years ago when she had tried to arrange a meeting with his parents. When the doctor had mentioned that she should watch her next pregnancy closely because of her two consecutive miscarriages, she didn't think much of it, she had been too lost in her pain. But now, she realised that it was at that exact moment that Christian had started being distant with her.

"Christian … I … We were broken up. I didn't want to put that weigh on your shoulders. I didn't see the point of giving you a grief you could do nothing about," She explained, not even acknowledging her never-ending tears.

Christian looked at her from head to toe, making like he was seeing her for the first time and giving her a cold shiver. Especially when he said, his voice glacial,

"If I didn't know you any better, I would say that you provoked that first miscarriage."

"You can't be serious. I _was_ going to tell you. As soon as the test showed I was pregnant, I knew I would tell you. But I wanted to go to the doctor first to be sure, and I lost the baby before I even had the chance to do so. There was no point in me going to see you, to tell you that you might have been a father.

And when we got back together, I just didn't see any reasons to tell you and get back to that dark time. It was very painful and I didn't want to put that pain on you."

Christian shook his head, barely moved by her words or her tears as he pointed out, "And yet, you had no problems telling James all about your pain. I heard you, Ana. You told him things you've never told me when I've always been honest about my feelings. The ups and the downs, I've always been clear to you. As I said, I may have had your love, but I never fully had your trust."

"_No_! I just needed someone to talk to, and he caught me in a moment of weakness. I _do_ trust you! More than you'll ever know."

"DON'T LIE!" He roared, swinging his hand on the side in a gesture of anger.

Unfortunately for it, the crib was on the way and found itself on the floor, several bars falling out of it. She widely opened her eyes, and for the first time in her life, she was truly scared of Christian. It wasn't the first time he was showing her his rawest emotions, it wasn't the first time that he was angry at her, and she could see why others were scared of him, but it was the first time she was scared and uncomfortable being alone in a room with him. And so she wrapped her hands around herself, taking a minute step backwards.

Christian immediately took notice of it, not doing a thing to reassure her, but not scaring her any further; and Ana saw behind him her father appear, probably worried about the commotion. She saw how his eyes went from the broken crib to her shivering in a corner, and before he could do or say anything, Christian straightened up, and turned his back on her, walking out of the nursery.

At the door, Raymond stopped him, ready to confront him, but Christian did not let the older man utter a word, as he threatened whispered in a dark tone, "_Move_."

Raymond glanced up at Ana again who silently implored him of not making a scene, and he stepped aside, allowing Christian to go. She counted to five before going after him, asking her father to let her do her thing. She knew that Christian would never have an open conversation if Raymond was around. This was probably the reason why he left in the first place.

She caught up with him by the front door, and grabbed his shoulder as she implored him, "Please don't leave angry with me."

She hated the fact that he was going away and that their last words were words of anger because she couldn't help but fear every time he was going away that it might be the last time she would ever see him. And though Christian usually assured her at this point that he would be fine and that she would see him before she knew it, this time, he only stiffened under her touch, a cold aura emanating from him.

"_Remove your hand_," He gritted between his teeth, and when she didn't, he turned to look down on her, anger blazing in his eyes.

"How many times will I have to tell you not to go behind my back? Of course, I care that we lost the baby, but that's beside the point! When I had the phone call, my first thoughts were about you, not about the baby! I care that you're okay, I care that you're healthy, I care that you're not endangered!

But _you_! You knew all along that you were more prone to a miscarriage because you already had one due to medical reasons! And you still took the decision to keep it to yourself and carry on this pregnancy, knowing the risks. Do you think I never noticed the innuendos your doctor had? I just never understood where they were coming from.

But now I do. You just never deemed me trustworthy enough to share this information with me."

His last sentence broke Ana's heart. It was as if he was just realising something terrible that he couldn't change, and she wished she could assure him that he was wrong. She had been the one who made the stupid decision, not because of him, but because of herself.

"Christian …"

"Anyone else, and they wouldn't be standing talking to me, right now. Man or woman, if anyone would have betrayed my trust like that, they would be six feet underground as we speak. Be grateful that you are my wife."

And on those words, he left the residence, not looking back even once as he walked to the gate, leaving behind him a heartbroken Ana. She wiped her face, her sobs only getting stronger and closed the door after five minutes when it was obvious that Christian would not come back. numbly, she walked back to her room where her father was waiting for her, pacing and anxious. As soon as he saw her, he walked to her, and inquired,

"Sweetheart, did he hurt you?"

His tone was full of anger, making Ana sure that if she had the misfortune of saying yes, her father would probably do his best to end Christian. But the truth was, Christian had done nothing but force her to look in the mirror, so she could see that she was the one who had destroyed their marriage.

So she shook her head, and said the truth, "No, Dad. _I_ hurt him, not the other way around."

.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**‼️BTW, next chapter will be someone else's POV. Anyone who can guess gets a sneak peek... So can you guess who it is going to be. ‼️**

**💚 I want to say that the way Ana feels does not reflect at all how I feel about women who suffer miscarriages. I don't think that because you can't (or it is difficult) to have babies, you are less than a woman. It's just the way many women suffering from this feel, and I just want to reflect this hard fact of life. Still, I will not tolerate any hate against them. We should support them, and not make them feel even worse.**

**💚 Now ... I think it was quite obvious that we were going there. I mean, it was in the prologue, and we had so much cuteness and fluff lately, you didn't know me well if you thought it would last ... But it was necessary. And, I know it hurts, but as I keep on saying, this story has dark themes, though it will end in HEA.**

💚** Well ... Christian is proper angry. What do you think? Do you agree with him staying away from Ana?**

💚**And, well, I have to say, sorry for the tears ...**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was that last sentence...**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	82. Chapter 13: No Bravery

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚Also, as this chapter once again touch the very sensitive topic of religion, I am putting another warning. I want you to know that i****t is never my intention to offend someone when I write, especially when I write a certain type of character which can represent someone's beliefs or ideology. Still,****‼️****_DON'T YOU DARE ATTACK SOMEONE'S BELIEF IN THE COMMENT SECTION_!****‼️**** Any negative and aggressive comment concerning someone's religion or views will be automatically removed. I don't care if it's about the story, or the characters, just don't attack people and their religion! I am really serious about that!**

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 13****: **** No Bravery ~ by James Blunt (3,6K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Father Crowley's PoV**

As the bell struck ten, Father Crowley closed the front door of the Church before making sure that all the bibles were at their places on the benches. Then, he went to extinguish the burning candles, his mind still preoccupied on whether he should change his sermon for the next day, or not. He had one ready since the preceding Sunday, but the shootout that had happened just a couple of blocks away that very same day made him reconsider.

He decided to go to his office and work and that new sermon, so he could inspire love and hope and stop his parishioners from being quick to judge and close themselves off to the ones in need. But once in his office, he found someone he did not expect to ever see in his church.

Christian Grey-Steele was sitting in his chair, apparently waiting for him, his face dark and cold and his eyes circled by heavy bags that showed that the man hadn't slept for days. And though he was surprised to see Christian coming to him, the religious man was not surprised that Christian seemed to have been so affected by his recent grief.

No matter his feelings for the mobster and his ways of life, the priest knew that no person in the world deserved to lose their child, even less when they didn't even get to hold the child at least once in their arms. Moreover, Ana had often told the holy man that fatherhood had been Christian's dream. The only thing he had ever really wanted.

The two men looked at each other, assessing one another, and the priest consciously closed the door, ready to give his whole attention to this man in need, despite the fact that he knew that the criminal did not share his religious beliefs. He was a soul in need, and no matter how tainted the soul was, it was his duty to help him feel better.

"It's not what you think," Christian said as the priest sat in front of him, and Father Crowley rose an eyebrow, not sure why would Christian have come if it wasn't because he had lost all hopes and God was now the only person he could turn to.

He watched the young man get up and start pacing, not saying a word as his brows were strongly knotted and his hands were behind his back. For ten good minutes, this silence imposed by Christian remained and the good priest did nothing but look at the man, waiting for him to open up on his own.

And finally, the copper-haired man stopped pacing, looking at the priest in his eyes, and said, "I came because you are most likely the only person who will be the most honest with me. Despite how you feel about me, I trust that … your_ profession _will make you say things how they are, unbiased, without any sugarcoating or animosity."

Father Crowley did not say a word, surprised by Christian's words, and he watched the young man sit back in the chair of his office and rest his elbows on his knees. It seemed that, whatever Christian Grey had on his mind, it was not easy for him to talk about it. But the priest could understand. Christian was not a believer, so it was probably very hard for him to seek solace with a man of Faith.

"I know you can't talk about what is said in this … _establishment_. But, as a person, not as a priest, do you think that my wife fears me?"

"Well, I have to say, I was not expecting that," Was all the priest had to say.

He never expected Christian to actually value anything he had to say, or even respect him enough to see his words as truth and not him trying to preach. And he didn't blame the man. He knew not everyone was a believer, and from what Ana had told him over the years, even though he did not agree with Christian's views on life, or ways of life, he could understand that the man only relied on himself and no one else.

And yet, in his hour of need, at the moment he doubted himself as a man more than he ever did, he still came to see God's spokesman. Sure, it wasn't because of his relationship with God, but more because of Father Crowley's relationship with Ana, but still, the holy man knew that if Christian thought nothing of him, he wouldn't have come in the first place.

He watched the copper-haired man expectantly looking at him, not sure of how he would be able to appease this soul who clearly did not want to be preached when one of Ana's many statements about Christian came into tuition. He was not a patient man.

"Answer the fucking question, _damn it_!" Christian burst, snapping his head to the priest and glaring at him.

"This is the house of God, Christian. You would do well to remember, no matter your feelings on the matter," Father Crowley patiently said, though his tone still echoes with a warning. "Now, what would make you think that _Ana,_ of all people, could ever be scared of you?"

Christian looked down, seemingly wearing the weight of the world on his shoulders. The good priest let the mobster come out on his own, observing every little detail about him, all the while racking his brains for all the times Ana had mentioned Christian to him in confessional.

Never in all these years Ana had known Christian, she expressed feeling fear in his presence. Even when Christian had been nothing more than one of her father's man, she was never scared around him, just like she was never scared around her father. Of course, she knew that both of those men inspired fear in the world, but she never really experienced why first hand, and if Father Crowley had to give one thing to Raymond and his disciple, was the fact that both men deeply loved Ana and would do anything to keep her safe.

So it was a strange concept that Christian felt that Ana feared him when he was probably the person she felt safest around, beside her father. But then again, Father Crowley hadn't seen Ana since the hospital, and people could change a lot because of grief.

When Christian finally talked, he didn't look up, staring a blank space on the floor as he went on, "Today, for the first time in our relationship, I have seen fear in my wife's eyes as she looked at me.

You and I know very well what kind of man I am, but no matter how angry I might I have been in the past, no matter how much I might have raised my voice, Ana has never shown fear. And … I always thought that it was because she knew that I could never hurt her…"

His voice broke a little, and for a little while, it seemed that he was lost in his thoughts, or maybe he was seeing all over again the look of fright that Ana gave him, which made Father Crowley curious. What could Christian have done to waver Ana's blind faith in him? Ana had always defended Christian, claiming that he had a sweet side that no one but her saw, and yet, she had shown enough fear for the mobster to come to _a priest_.

When Christian spoke again, the man of God was sure that the copper-haired man was more talking to himself than to the priest, but he still listened, trying to see through the maze of his brain,

"I'm not so sure, anymore … I mean … I could never hurt her, but maybe she doubts that. Maybe that's why she never said anything about her first miscarriage. Because she was scared of me and how I'd react. But I would have been there for her, no matter our relationship at the time. I _should_ have been there for her."

"Well, Ana really does know you better than anyone else," The priest scoffed, not ready to hear the younger man wail in self-pity. The mobster snapped his head up to glare at the holy man who explains this point-of-view,

"I don't think Ana has ever been scared of you, Christian. She's actually the one always preaching me how good and sweet of a man you can be."

"I saw the fear in her eyes!"

"And maybe you misinterpreted it. Maybe Ana feared that your desire for fatherhood was stronger than your love for her, and you did nothing to prove her wrong. Where were you the past couple of days?"

Christian remained silent, though Father Crowley wasn't sure if it was because he was pondering on this possibility, or if it was because he didn't want to tell him what happened of what happened since the miscarriage. He had noticed back at the hospital the distance between the couple, even though Ana always swore that Christian was a very tactile man when he was with her, and he feared that, in order to protect Ana from his own feelings, Christian had retrieved and not said a word to his wife since the terrible news dropped. It was something he often saw in couples, especially younger couples. Miscommunication could easily lead to the downfall of a relationship.

He waited for five minutes for Christian to speak on his own, but when it became transparent that the mobster had no intentions on opening up further, but was still expecting a miracle from the priest, the good Father called him out on it,

"You can't come in here, asking me to help you see clearer in your relationship, and yet refusing to talk to me. Don't see me as a priest. Unlike Ana, I am not delusional enough to think that you will ever choose the path of God. But no matter how you feel about me and this House, I am here to ease your pain away. No matter how you feel about God, you are one of His children, and I am here to listen and help you find a way, whether that way leads to Him or not, it is only up to you."

Christian looked at him, his shoulders still holding the weight of the world, before he finally let out, though it seemed to require great efforts from him, "I was back in our apartment."

"_You haven't been back in the mansion over the past two days_?" The priest mused, realising that things were much worse than he thought. Maybe he would have ought to pay a visit to Ana. Given her heart of gold, she had probably been crying her heart out, feeling that her whole world was crashing down. Sure, Father Crowley had never approved of Ana keeping a secret her first miscarriage. He could understand that some people dealt with grief by keeping it to themselves, but it wasn't Ana's case. And she had originally meant to talk to Christian about it before she lost the baby. So in the priest's eyes, she shouldn't only tell him about the positive, but also the negative. Of course, Ana didn't listen, but that didn't mean that she deserved what was happening to her, or to be left out by her husband in her hour of need.

Christian glared at him, clearly not liking the accusatory and judging tone that the priest had used, not that Father Crowley cared,

"I did. And there she was, confessing all those things she never told me to that bastard. Not to her father, not to her best friend, not even to the maid, but to that f_ucking moron_ who just got back from India!"

"Language! Don't forget that you are in the House of God!"

"You said not to see you as a priest!"

"And yet, you are still in God's House. I am sure that you respect your wife enough to respect this holy place to her, no matter your feelings about it."

Christian rolled his eyes, but Father Crowley could tell that he would not hear the man cuss again in his church. After all, men like Christian and Raymond were men of pride, and the priest was sure that Christian prided himself to show all kinds of respect to Ana.

He deeply breathed through his nose, looking at this man who was lost and broken, though he would never admit it, and for a moment, the good priest pondered on how powerful love could be. It always amazed him when he would witness those kinds of situations.

Christian Grey had tainted the newspapers for quite some years, and not always for the bests of reasons. Though nothing was ever proven and all were speculations, he had been linked to countless murders, had tortured dozens of people, and even ruined lives just for the sake of a statement. And yet, the man who seemed to be made of steel had been broken by the simple fact that the woman he loved felt more comfortable sharing her insecurities with another man.

He could see Christian's point-of-view, and in his heart of heart, he felt that Ana should have talked to Christian about those insecurities, him being her husband and the best person to reassure her. But it still amazed him that a man so cold could be broken by the simplicity of love.

"Christian … I do understand that this is a difficult time for the two of you, and I will never try to pretend that I know what either of you is going through. But your wedding vows were clear, _in sickness and in health_."

"I know," Christian said, hanging his head low. The priest waited, sure that the mobster would add something else, and it did not fail, "But I can't do _a thing_ for her."

"You can be with her. Despite her wealth and her upbringing, Ana has a gentle soul. All she needs is your presence by her side. And right now, you're not helping. Why did you desert her?"

Christian grimaced, clearly not happy with the Father's choice of words, not that the man cared. He was certainly not going to sugarcoat _Christian Grey_ of all people.

"I … didn't want to go back to her with blood on my hands. Not this time."

"Whose blood?"

"The ass … the guy who bumped into Ana and made her fall."

"You killed him?! But the fall was not the reason for Ana's miscarriage!"

Christian rose an eyebrow at the priest as if he was questioning the good man's intelligence. After all, they both knew who he was, and what he did to people who went against him, and Father Crowley had no doubts that Christian cared very little if the man was the reason behind the loss of his child, he had still been in the way, and apparently that was reason enough for him.

"And did killing that man bring you peace? Or maybe it brought you your child back?"

"It's a matter of principle. And I'm not here to talk about this insignificant matter."

"Right. So, tell me, why are you here, talking to me, instead of being with Ana?" Father Crowley asked, doing his best to not preach that ending a man's life was indeed a significant matter. He knew that Christian would not listen to him, and if he could make an impact in that man's life, he knew it would be via Ana, so Christian would need to go back to his wife.

"I have to go away for a week, and the last image I have of my wife is her being scared out of her skin by my words and my very presence. I want you to tell me how to fix it!"

"I can't do anything, and you know it. You know that the only person who can do something is yourself, Christian. So now, be honest with me and yourself, _why are you here_?"

Christian pondered for a moment, before promptly getting up as he said, "It was a mistake."

Father Crowley got up as fast as the mobster, blocking his passage to leave the office. He knew very well that he had no chance if Christian chose to use force, but he still believed that no matter Christian's feelings towards the Church, he would still respect the institution itself and would have the decency to not kill him in the house of God. If not for priority, for Ana's sake.

"You know it wasn't. You know you've done something wrong by deserting your wife in the time she needed you the most. And instead of seeking absolution with her, you came to me. Well, let me tell you, even if you were a believer, neither God nor I could absolve you. It is Ana that you hurt, and only she can make you feel better."

"You got this all wrong, _Padre_. I didn't come for absolution. I know my wrongs, and I've never been afraid to own up to them. I came here because my wife is scared of me. I came here because I want to know for how long she has been scared of me. If she's scared, she can't trust me. If she had trusted me all those years ago, we wouldn't be in this situation right now."

"You seem to forget who your wife is. She didn't keep her miscarriage because she doesn't trust you. If you must know, Ana has had blind faith in you since before you even started this whole affair together.

She kept her hurt for herself because she was sure you would do what you're doing, finding a way to blame yourself instead of accepting that sometimes, things happen that are out of our control. She should have told you sooner, you will never hear me say otherwise. And I know that when she was still carrying, she had planned to come to you, with proof from the doctor. And yet, she lost the baby. I know that death is something you see daily, but have you thought of how it must feel for a woman t no longer carry this precious life?

And now she experienced that, yet again. It is not her fault, it is not your fault, and it is certainly not God's fault. Life happens, and as I told Ana back at the hospital, God knows who is strong enough to endure life's harshest lessons.

Ana loves you with all her heart, but she's had a very poor example of what love is in her childhood. Her father adores her, probably as much as he loved his wife. But we both know he spoiled her, and once thing we can't take away from Raymond, is that he was always there for her. And now, when life struck her with its cruellest twist, the man she had expected to be by her side deserted her bed and her house, because of his ego.

You might hide behind the morals of trust, but in the end, it has been two days since you saw your wife. We both know that you've already shared her bed after killing a man, we both know that you would never hurt her. We both know that she will forgive your behaviour in the blink of an eye.

You were just a coward, Christian. This moment where a wife and husband are supposed to bear their souls to one another, to show their emotions as raw as they can get, you chose the cowardly way out and hid under the pretence of 'you scaring your wife', and that's why she confided in someone else. But you weren't there.

Man up, and be the husband Ana believes you are."

As he finished his tirade, Father Crowley opened the office's door, subtly dismissing the mobster. For a second, he feared for his life, as Christian looked at him from head to toe, with such a cold look that the hair of his neck rose up. It wasn't lost on him that he had just accused a notorious criminal of being a coward.

But then, Christian surprised him, straitening his coat and saying with a polite and even tone, "Thank you. As I said, I came for an unbiased opinion."

And on those words, he left. The good priest watched the young man walk away, surprised that he took so well hearing those words, and though it was far from his usual counselling, he was quite proud of having touched that particular soul, even if he had to do it in unconventional ways.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

💚** Now that we have a better understanding of Christian, what do you think of him? And to make it clear, Christian went to the priest for an objective PoV. Raymond, Jose and Mia would have been biased, and he just wanted who would be as neutral as possible, but with still of a backstory.**

💚**And, what did you think of Father Crowley and his words to Christian, as well as his thoughts about Ana?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. Mine was that last part, the priest is being a savage, haha.**

**💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	83. Chapter 14: We Belong Together

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚Also, thank you guys for your reviews and support. Every time Father Crowley gets in the picture, I worry, and it is always a relief to see that you guys are being so tolerant and all. So thank you all.**

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 14****: **** We Belong Together ~ by ****Mariah Carrey**** (3,6K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

When Ana woke up the next day, she didn't move, staring into space as she was feeling more and more empty by the minute. She had only fallen asleep when the sun started to rise, and she was trying to rationalise herself and the whole situation.

On one hand, she could understand Christian and his point-of-view. She could understand that he felt betrayed by her silence and even more by the fact that she told James things that she had never told him. But the fact was, James at caught her in a moment of weakness. She never intended to tell him any of this, he had just been there at the right time. In fact, she knew for a fact that, if Christian had been there, he would have been the one on whose shoulder she would have cried.

And this was what had kept Ana up all night. After her self-pity on how, once again, she had badly handled things in her couple, she started feeling angrier and angrier against Christian. She didn't care if he was angry, or hurt. _He was her husband_ and he failed her. That one simple thing he had been supposed to do for her, he didn't. He had left her all alone when she had needed him the most.

Everyone around her had come to see her, to show support, to give her words of encouragement and hope for the future, everyone but the person who should have been there for the start. Christian didn't give her a single word of comfort since they learnt they lost their baby.

She angrily wiped her tears away, turning on her bed and facing the cold and empty side of it. Surprisingly, she found Bastille curled up on Christian's pillow, looking at her with his round blue eyes. She sadly smiled, petting the cat who immediately started purring when she did so. Bastille usually stayed at a distance when she was on her periods, so she hadn't expected to see the cat for a while.

For a long hour, she did nothing but caress the ginger cat, ignoring the two times someone knocked on her door before she abruptly got up, and went to the bathroom to have a shower. She already wallowed in her self-pity when she lost her first baby, and she refused to do the same once again. With or without Christian, she would survive this loss and avoid the depression that loomed over her the last time.

Once she was clean, she called Lauren and asked the girl to drive her to Church. She had much too much anger pent up inside her, and she just needed to let it out. She managed to sneak out of the house without bumping into her father, knowing that he was probably going to make a big deal out of what happened last night.

She hadn't gone back to the nursery, not eager to see the proof of Christian's anger laying around. She still couldn't believe that, for the first time in their relationship, Christian resulted in violence in front of her. She wasn't naive enough to think that her husband was a peaceful man, but he always made a point to differentiate his work and their home-life. She knew that Christian would never lay a hand on her, but she was still shocked by his display of violence.

When Lauren parked in front of the Church, Ana asked her to stay in the car, not wanting the girl to follow her around whilst she was baring her soul to her good Father, and she entered the Holy House, walking straight to the candles. She lit one, silently saying a little prayer for this son that she would never get to hold, or even name, though, in her heart, he would always be a little Mike.

"I have been meaning to pay you a visit today, my child," Said the benevolent voice of Father Crowley behind her.

She turned but didn't find the strength to smile. Instead, she leaned in the embrace the religious man gave her. She took in the comfort he was giving her, feeling like a little kid again, when she had her first confession and earned her first absolution.

When she finally stepped out of Father Crowley's arms, he sweetly smiled to her, lifting her chin with his finger before he said what she had known in her heart all along,

"I'm not the one you want to talk to, Ana. You know what I will say, so just do what your heart tells you. There is nothing **_I_** can say that we make you feel better."

"What if —"

"Child, 'what if' is what the chick says before jumping out of the nest. It only depends on you whether you fly or crash."

She nodded, looking down on her hands before she went to sit on one of the benches, asking in her silent prayers forgiveness for her angry thoughts after her miscarriage. She believed that she would have a child again. Both Elena and Raymond had told her so. And even more, she was living with the proof that belief could bring a child in her hearth.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

A few hours after her encounter with the priest, Ana was waiting in Christian's hotel room, nervously checking her phone every two minutes. She had been there for more than a couple of hours, now, and it was almost midnight, and yet, Christian was still out and about.

She did her best to calm that stupid and ridiculous voice of doubt telling her that Christian was through with her and found solace in the arms of Gia who was more suitable for him. After all, she could probably bear children without losing them. And she had no problems being part of his criminal world. But she always shut down the voice by saying that Christian loved her. Despite his terrible words of the previous night, he still loved her. Or at least, she liked to believe he did.

Her phone buzzed again, showing that her Dad was tried to call her for the millionth time of the day. She hadn't told anyone where she was going, asking Lauren to keep the secret, but she couldn't let her father keep worrying like that,

**I'm okay, Dad. Stop worrying. I'll call you tomorrow morning. ~ Ana **

**OF COURSE, I WORRY! Where are you? Lauren isn't telling. ~ ****Dad **

**I'm with Lauren. I just needed some time on my own. Promise I will call you first thing in the morning. ~ Ana **

Her phone buzzed again, indicating that Raymond had answered her, but the front door finally opened. She got up, straightening her clothes and her hair, but Christian still wasn't in the room, talking to someone else,

"Maybe we could have breakfast together in the morning."

"I don't think so, Gia."

"Well, you never know. Just keep it in mind. And if you need _anything_ during the night, I'm literally next door."

Christian didn't respond anything, finally fully getting in the room, and freezing when he saw Ana standing behind him. But his surprise was nothing compared to hers when she saw that he was holding a puppy in his arms.

The pup was all black, except for a white patch on its torso and his paws being all white as well. It seemed to be a husky, though she had never seen a husky so black before, and its eyes were crystal blue.

The puppy barked, jumping on the floor and rushing to Ana and she instinctively crouched to pick it up, instantly rewarded by happy licks.

"What are you doing here?" Christian finally asked, sitting on the edge of the bed and carefully looking at her.

"I came to see my husband."

"Shouldn't you be resting? I mean. Is it even safe for you to travel like that?"

"Well, we need to talk, and I wasn't going to wait a whole week for you to come back," She snapped, though she avoided looking him in the eyes, focusing her attention on the puppy.

Christian remained silent for a moment, and then she finally looked back at him, he was by her side, making her jump a little. He fell down his knees, so they were both on the floor and what she had never expected from Christian happened, he broke down in tears, taking her face between his hands,

"I'm so sorry. I should have been there for you, and I let my anger get the better of me. It wasn't the time or the place. I should have been there for you, and I wasn't. I promised you that I'd always be here for you, and for the first time in my life, I failed my word. I am so sorry, Ana."

"Christian …"

"_Please_, forgive me," He pleaded, taking her in his arms and burying his face in the crook of her neck.

She hadn't expected any of this. She had expected a very heated discussion where they would both let out all they had to say, and still, end up reconciling by the end of the night. Instead, Christian seemed to know already he had been in the wrong. But she didn't want to let any unsaid thing come between them like it did in the past.

"Christian, I … I understand where you came from when you said all those things yesterday night, but … well … you left me, and it hurt me. And then, yesterday night, you made me feel like you no longer loved nor respected me. And …"

"I am so sorry. It was never my intention. I was hurt and scared, and then, I saw James and ... I didn't think clearly." He put some distance between them, and looked deep in her eyes,

"I want children, Ana. I never made it a secret. But not at your expense. I don't care about where the kids come from, as long as we get to raise them _together_. And hearing that you already had a miscarriage, that you never told me about it, that it could have endangered you. I don't want to lose you. I'm not a good man enough to lose you. You're the one bringing the good out of me. Without you … I'd be a whole different man."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to feel bad when there was nothing that could have been done about it. And ... not telling you was making it less real. More like a nightmare than reality," She confessed with a small voice.

Christian looked deep in her eyes, and she reached to wipe away his tears. This was the first time that was seeing Christian being completely overwhelmed by his emotions. Even when they learnt that they were expecting a boy, he still had some control over himself.

"Did you think I came here to leave you?"

"We need to talk, is never a great opener."

"No, but we needed to talk. This is how we grow stronger as a couple."

He weakly smiled, closing his eyes and leaning in to kiss her. But they were interrupted by a yap coming from her laps. She chuckled, retaking the little ball of hair in her arms, asking it,

"What are you doing here, anyway?"

"I read somewhere that it was a good way to get over the loss of a child."

She smiled, scratching the pup being its ears, and looking at the necklace, seeing that Christian had already found a name for the pet and inscribed it in Japanese on its necklace.

"Omoi."

He smiled, petting the dog as well, as he explained, his words strangely sounding like something Father Crowley would say, just a tad less religious, "Because, even if we've had a door closed on us, it only means that we will get stronger and appreciate more what's to come in the future."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

When she woke up the next morning, Ana found a note where Christian had been sleeping, explaining that he went for a jog with Omoi. She smiled, feeling so much better now that the two of them have talked. She didn't think that things would suddenly be all peachy all over again, but at least, they both admitted their wrongs and were both willing to go forward and let the past to the past.

She reached for her phone, about to call her Dad, now that she could tell him where she was, without him telling Christian and ruining the surprise, or losing his temper over it because of what had happened two nights ago. But Raymond had texted her already.

**Christian called and said that you were staying in Chicago for the week with him. Don't let your old man worry like that, next time. My ticker isn't what it used to be. I love you. ~ Dad **

She smiled at the text, getting out of bed and taking a quick shower, grimacing at the amount of blood that she was still losing. She had always been lucky on that aspect, because, though her periods usually lasted five days, she never lost much blood. But this time, just like after her first miscarriage, she felt that a horror movie was happening in her vagina. And though she knew that the bleeding would be longer than usual, she still couldn't wait to get this over with.

She was barely out of the shower, that someone knocked on the door, and she didn't bother dressing up, assuming that it was Christian who left without the key. So she opened the door, only wrapped in her towel, and found Gia in front of her, all dressed and dolled up.

The two women looked at one another for a moment, before Gia regained her composure,

"Oh, I had no idea Christian had company."

"He doesn't. He has a wife though who missed him and came to spend the week with him."

"Of course, Mrs Steele. I was just here to see if Christian wanted to have breakfast. Perhaps you can join us, once you're more … appropriate."

Ana squinted at her choice of words, and at the way, Gia's eyes went to her stomach for a second. Maybe Gia had just meant that her being in a towel was indecent, but Ana had the clear impression that there was a double meaning to her words, clearly aimed at her losing a child.

But then again, she was still hormonal, and she was maybe being paranoid. All she knew, was that she took a step closer to Gia, and hissed between her teeth,

"I don't care how much your bat your lashes at Christian, _my husband_ will never fall for it. I'm just going to say it once. If I hear you made a move on my husband, I will —"

"What? Spray me with perfume?" Gia mocked, before turning her back on Ana and walking back to her room though she turned one last time, and added with a wicked grin,

"You know, Mrs Steele, if your marriage was so strong, you wouldn't need to warn me off. You're going to slip again, and I'll be here to pick up the pieces."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

**💚 So ... I know this chapter is short, but the next one will be short as well, haha. And I spoiled you way too much, giving you all those long ass chapters, haha.**

💚** Now, what did you think of the reconciliation?**

💚**And, what did you think of Father Crowley in this chapter, even if it was brief? What about Gia?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. And just so you know, in Japanese, one of the meanings of Omoi is Love, even though it's not the most common.**

**💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	84. Chapter 15: Everybody Wants To Be A Cat

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚By the way, some of you pointed out that Christian never lied to Ana, but neither did she. She omitted a truth, just like he does for Mike, or for what he thinks of Eric, or when she asked him not to kill anyone over her. **

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 15****: ****Everybody Wants To Be A Cat**** ~ by ****T****he Aristocats, Disney ****(1,7K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Bastille's PoV**

_They brought home a dog_. The humans brought home a dog.

When they moved him into the new place, Bastille didn't say much, because he was comfortable in this new place. He had more space to roam and he could hunt more often. So he put up living with the third human, the one who smelt like the female and that he had caught snooping around in the old place. He even allowed that other female human that gave him food and changed his litter to pet him from time to time.

He actually liked this new place, even though his human always made sure that he couldn't bring his game inside the house. Bastille was sure it was because the female human was a bit weak and squeamish when he brought his preys. She would always screech and turn her head in disgust, irritating Bastille's delicate ears.

In fact, Bastille wasn't sure if his human liked this new place. He often saw him in the garden, in the middle of the night, even after he left for two whole weeks and the female was with child. In fact, given the fact that the two humans disappeared together, Bastille had expected them to come back together with a baby. He would have been fine with a baby. But _no_.

The humans brought home a dog. A little pup that was noisy and irritating. As soon as she had gotten home, the female had brought the dog to Bastille's face, all smiley as she said, "Look, Bastille. This is your new brother. His name Omoi."

Of course, the dog being the annoying thing that he was, tried to lick him, and Bastille swiftly turned away, his tail low and his head high, showing his discontentment in the situation. Did the female think Bastille was stupid? The dog couldn't be his brother!

He went to the bedroom where the humans slept, and curled in the middle of it, hoping that the foolish humans would soon see reason and get rid of that nuisance that was the _dog_.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

The very same night, Bastille was stirred awake when his human came home. He had been glad to see that the female did not try to kick him out of the bed to welcome the dog. In fact, the dog had been removed several times from the bed, which made Bastille very smug. The female might like walking around with the pup in her arms, but he was not allowed on furniture, unlike him. The human probably knew that a dog was not as graceful as a cat and that he would break and dirty everything.

He got out the bed, smelling blood on his human's shirt like it often happened, and the man smiled and petted him when he saw him in the bathroom. Bastille waited for an explanation concerning that nuisance that had been brought home, but the human had always been quite slow. He couldn't expect much from him.

So he followed him to the room and recoiled when a bedside lamp was lit by the female. His human stopped, looking at the female with curiosity, and Bastille understood why. She usually slept through him getting into bed. Except when they would mate.

"How was your evening?" She asked, and Bastille jumped on the bed to be on her laps. He had noticed lately that she was blue, so he tried to stay by her side to cheer her up. Thing that a dog would never do, or understand, being an inferior species, and all.

"Are you alright?" Asked the male in return.

"I .." She hesitated, looking at Bastille and gently petting him. "I want to talk."

"About?"

"Gia?"

"What about her?"

"I don't think she should be spending so much time with you. _Alone_."

"We've been through this, Ana. Neither you nor I should care about her, or what she thinks. We should only care about one another."

"I know. And I do. I trust you, Christian. But … spending this week with the two of you … I … you spend all your days with her. It would be so easy—"

"Would you stop seeing James if I asked you?"

"James has never done anything to warrant —"

"And neither did Gia."

The female looked down, before moving Bastille a little and laying down in the bed, switching off the lamp. Bastille glared at his human, cursing the slowness that the man showed sometimes. The female had been sad for days, and here she was crying again.

He moved so she would open her arms to him, which she did, cuddling him against her and he purred, knowing that she liked hearing the sound. He felt the male lay down beside the female, and his hand rested on hers adding additional weight on Bastille.

"Babe … talk to me. Why are you so hung up on Gia?"

The female remained silent, and the male held her and Bastille closer.

"Babe?"

"Because she is perfect where I'm not, and I see the way she looks at you."

"I don't care how she looks at me. I already made it clear to her where my hearts lie."

"What about her being —"

"That's you talking nonsense. You are all I want."

"What if I can't have children anymore?"

"I told you already. I don't care about the DNA. I just want to raise kids _with you_. I once told you I didn't care about the mother of my child, well, that was before you. I don't want to lose you, Ana. Especially not in such a definitive way."

"Maybe you ought to … be with someone less defective."

There was a whoosh of wind, and Bastille knew that his human was angry now. The light was once again on, annoying him a little, and he got out of the bed, not really bothered to be in the middle of their argument. He made his way to the vanity and watched the couple as the male was now kneeling by the crying female side, cupping her face and forcing her to look at him,

"Don't … _ever_ say that again."

"But it's true, Christian. Women have been given birth since the dawn of times, and —"

"And they've had miscarriages for just as long. And they've died in childbirth for just as long. I told you before, and I'm telling you again, you are not defined by your status as a mother. You are your own person. I didn't marry you because I wanted children, I married you because I love _you_. Because I want to grow old with _you_. Because I want to raise _our_ kids with _you_."

Bastille watched as his human waited for the female to nod, and they pressed their mouths against each other. Though Bastille knew that they would not mate tonight. They never did when the female was bleeding, and he could smell the blood from here.

When the male switched off the light, Bastille left through the window and went hunting that nasty little squirrel he had seen on the previous day.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

The next morning, Bastille was in the garden, savouring his victory against the squirrel who thought it could still Bastille's territory when he saw his human walk out in the garden. Shortly after, the other human followed, the one Bastille didn't like. In fact, Bastille always hid whenever that human was around. He was hoping his human would pick up and not trust such a human, but his human was slow.

For a moment, the two men stayed silent, before the older one, the one Bastille didn't like, spoke,

"You broke your promise to me."

"I don't care."

"Well, I do!"

Bastille's human turned and looked down at the older man. "With all due respect, Raymond, I will always value your word. You are my mentor, and I will never forget what you did for me during all these years. But I told you before. I already lost Ana because I made her feel that your opinion mattered more than hers. And now, there is an opinion that matters to me more than yours.

I don't care about how you feel, I only care about my wife. This doesn't concern you. Yes, I said some hurtful things, but Ana isn't a white sheep in this either. I'll admit that I have more to be forgiven than she does, but this doesn't concern you as I said. It's between my wife and me."

"What are you going to do about it?"

Bastille watched his human stare into the horizon, and for a brief moment, he swore that his human knew exactly where he was.

"We're going to get through this. I asked the priest if he could see us once in a while, so we could lay all our cards with an impartial party."

"_Impartial_. You're talking about a preaching man."

"I am."

"Are you going religious?"

"No. I'm just being practical. He might be a preaching man, but he is someone who knows Ana and has her trust. Ana would never open up to a shrink, and neither would I."

"But you'd open up to a priest?"

Bastille's human turned to look once again at the older man, and Bastille saw the aura of an Alpha emanating from him. Just by his presence, he was putting the older man back in his place.

"No. I will open up to my wife. Ana trusts the man, and I trust my wife. If she says he's safe to talk to, I will put my pride aside and talk to the man."

Bastille didn't move from his spot, even after the two men went back inside. In fact, now that the sun was getting higher in the sky, he closed his eyes and appreciated the warm caress of it, until he was disturbed by the _pup. _

Before even opening his eyes, he knew that the dog was running to him. He heard the female call for him with his stupid name, and he snapped his eyes open, only to put his paw on the dog's nose when he was about to lick him.

The dog immediately stopped, admitting that Bastille was his superior, and Bastille nodded in agreement, closing his eyes as he let the pup lick his face. After all, it was just a child, and children needed to be treated with special care. As long as Omoi knew where his place was, Bastille would tolerate him.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

**💚 So ... I know this chapter is short, and a bit weird, because we have an important conversation, from Bastille's pov, and we don't have feelings and thoughts, but I'm evil, you should know that, haha**

💚** Now, what did you think of the conversation between Christian and Ana?**

💚**And, what did you think of the conversation between Val and Christian? And Christian's decision?**

**💚 And how about Bastille and Omoi? Bastille is a savage XD**

💚**And what's was your favourite part?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	85. Chapter 16: I See Fire

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚So, my family is visiting, so this is going to be the last chapter before a while ^^**

**💚By the way, some of you pointed out that Christian never lied to Ana, but neither did she. She omitted a truth, just like he does for Mike, or for what he thinks of Eric, or when she asked him not to kill anyone over her. **

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 16****: ****I See Fire**** ~ by Ed Sheeran ****(2,1K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Christian's PoV**

Christian stayed silent as Ryan finished the meeting for him. As his friend would say, bit by bit, he was turning more and more into Raymond. Though he was now making most of the shots since Raymond was less and less present, he rarely ever talked, just as Raymond did when he was his second in command. He was just there, imposing respect and fear by his mere presence. In fact, the newest recruits were always in panic when he was the one conducting the meetings, and that was the way he liked it.

Ever since Ana's miscarriage, six months ago, he had forbidden the access to the mansion to anything that was business-related. So when they gathered together, it was at Christian's old flat. Ryan and Jose still visited Christian and his wife at the mansion, but it was only for mundane moments since they were his friends.

Of course, this change he imposed on everyone, including Raymond was, first of all, so the difference between work and home would be very well defined. Though Ana had forgiven him for the way he spoke to her that night, he hadn't. In fact, Raymond's words kept on haunting him since then. The ones when his mentor had told him how, because of his job, he had acted too hastily when it came to his family.

This was something that he swore himself would never happen to him, and he actually told Ana on many occasions to not hesitate to call him if she felt he was crossing the line. In fact, this had been brought up during one of their many sessions with Father Crowley. At least once a month, Ana and he would go to Church to talk with the priest, and, though Christian never thought he would be one of those people who went to counselling, he still did it for his marriage.

Neither Ana nor he thought that their couple was in danger, but it was something to make sure it would stay strong. On more than one occasion, the priest made Christian be more open about himself to Ana, and on more than one occasion, he told Ana to stop expecting Christian to know what she wanted of him without even telling him first.

It was during one of those sessions that Christian understood that Ana's insecurities against Gia were more than that, they were actually founded. She confessed, after Father Crowley forced her to speak her truth, that Gia had had some words with her that made Christian's blood boil.

The very next day, he was ready to kill the girl and had only been stopped by Ryan. Christian had spared the girl begrudgingly, but when he had been training her to follow his and Ryan's footsteps, she now had been relegated to the very last rank in their hierarchy, and Christian had absolutely no trust in her anymore.

For a long time, he had thought that Ana's jealousy towards Gia was like his own towards James, just unwarranted and a test of their love for one another. But he had been wrong all along. So now, he was just biding his time, waiting for Gia to just blink the wrong way to end her.

With a little shake of the head, he came back to the present moment as Ryan dismissed everyone, which surprised Christian. There was still a few more things to be said, but then he understood as the front door opened and revealed Ana coming in, all smiles to him.

This was another thing that had changed over the past six months. Ana would sometimes pop up to meetings, texting Ryan or himself beforehand. She always made sure that her father wasn't here when she came, and Christian and Ryan always made sure that she would not assist in meetings that would be too gruesome for her.

In fact, it was an idea coming from the priest, who, despite the fact that he made it very clear he did not approve of Christian's profession, he approved even less that Christian was trying to keep Ana in the dark. According to him, no healthy relationship could bloom if he kept such an important part of his life hidden away from her.

He smiled at his wife as Ryan led the men outside, though he still bothered to wink at Christian before closing the door, and Ana came to sit on Christian's laps when the flat was empty, kissing him with love. He eagerly responded, always enjoying those moments when she was even more forward than usual.

With the same love, he caressed her face, looking into the tree of her eyes, and she asked, between two kisses, "What are you up to tomorrow?"

"I have a few things lined up. Why?"

"I want a date with you."

Christian chuckled, shaking his head a little. "Since when do you need to plan a date in advance?"

She mysteriously smiled and took something out of her pocket to give it to him. He looked down, and his heart skipped a bit as he realised that it was a pregnancy test. _A positive pregnancy test_. He looked back at his wife who was all smiles for him, taking his head between her small hands to kiss him.

He responded early, a feeling of glee and pride taking over him. They had been talking about it for some time, and Christian had been the one putting on hold trying to have children again. He wanted to make sure that Ana understood clearly that it wasn't his priority. Of course, he wasn't giving up on his dream of being a father, but there were other ways to get there.

Slowly, Ana turned their kiss into something more celebratory, and when she reached for his belt, he stopped her, not wanting to take her where he had just been talking business with mobsters. So he took her in his arms and brought her upstairs to their bedroom that was decorated exactly the same way Ana had left it when they moved to the mansion.

As he laid her on the bed, he looked at the brunette with adoration, and she told him, "This time I don't want to tell anyone until it's obvious."

"What about your father?"

"No. Just you and me. If something goes wrong, I don't want the world to pity us. I just want you and I to help each other. Is that okay?"

He smiled, pecking her lips. "Of course it is. Just you, me, and our baby," He assured her, resting his hand on her stomach and earning another bright smile from her.

"So you'll come with me to the doctor, tomorrow?"

He gave her a look, silently asking if she was really asking this question, and she giggled, yanking him closer so she could kiss him as she slowly ground against him. "What about the things you had to do?"

"What things?"

She laughed again, happy beyond measures before looking at him with seriousness. Christian stopped his quest of undressing her, surprised by her change of mood, and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Can you make me promise?"

He looked at her, not giving his word to something he didn't know, yet, and she explained, "I know the doctor is probably going to be all medical and all, and we're probably going to freak out, but please, hon, don't become overbearing."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

Christian had given his word to not be overbearing, and it was the hardest thing to do. The further Ana got into her pregnancy, the more he had to control his impulses to just lock her in their room until the baby was born. Especially after the doctor had explained that it would be best if she remained bedridden.

Christian stopped going abroad, or even out of the city. He stayed by Ana's side, relying more and more on Ryan, which his second in command understood completely. Of course, Ryan being Ryan couldn't stop but joking about it, but Christian didn't care the least in the world.

Just like he didn't care when Raymond made a scene that he hadn't been told at once that his daughter was pregnant. Ana was his priority and the baby girl inside of her. Especially since Ana often had those panics in the middle of the night where she would cry and beg him to choose their daughter if the worst was to come.

Christian never promised anything, ushering her to sleep every night and always happy when she was a bit more cheery in the morning. He wasn't really sure why she was so pessimistic with this pregnancy. Perhaps it was because she already suffered from two miscarriages, or maybe, it was because this pregnancy was much harder on her than the previous one.

Unlike the time she had been expecting their son, this time, she was often ill, even after the first trimester, struggling to keep food down, and even sometimes to get out of bed. It was in the middle of the sixth month that they knew why this pregnancy was so different.

"You're expecting twins," The doctor said, making both Ana and Christian snap their heads to him.

"_WHAT_?"

"How did you miss a whole other baby?!" Christian almost roared, and Ana squeezed his hand to calm him down.

This was their third ultrasound, and only now this incompetent charlatan was telling them of this very important news. The man did not waver in front of Christian's ire, and simply explained,

"It does happen sometimes when the second baby is well hidden during the first one. But twins mean that you won't carry this pregnancy until this end, especially in your condition. We can look to induce it as soon as it will be safe for both the babies and yourself."

Ana looked at Christian, smiling, even though she looked tired, and he carefully listened to all the recommendation the doctor gave them, as he was taking in the fact that they were expecting a second daughter.

On their way home, Ana was ecstatic and asked that they could go to their flat instead of the mansion, so they could celebrate. She couldn't stop saying over and over again that they were getting two babies for one.

"Finally, I will outnumber Dad and you. It will be the three of us girls, against the two of you."

Christian chuckled, and she teased, "That's probably the monster cock striking and showing its power. But you better behave, I don't think my body can take triplets for our next round."

He shook his head, putting his hand on her prominent stomach and rewarded by a little kick from one of his daughters. For the first time in weeks, Ana was not going to bed in tears, fearing what may happen in the future. On the contrary, she was joyous and excited.

For the first time in weeks, they made love, and she fell asleep with a happy smile spread on her face. Christian watched her sleep for hours, doing his best to keep his worries for himself. He was excited himself that they would get to have two daughters, but he couldn't help but fear. What if none of them made it?

Every night Ana had cried, Christian had reassured her, but a voice inside of him reminded him that Raymond lost his first wife to childbirth. He had told his mentor about this fear, and Raymond had no reassuring words for him. This was a fear that had haunted him when Carla had been pregnant and he knew he was powerless against.

Which was why once he was sure Ana was sound asleep, he went to the shooting stand to release his nerves. For an hour, he was alone with his thought, doing his best to appease his worries. There was no need for him to obsess over something he had no control over. Especially when Ana was already so susceptible to melancholy.

"I didn't expect to see you here," Gia's voice echoed behind him.

Christian snapped his head, locking his jaw and putting the gun down before doing something that would put him in a bad mood. Gia meekly smiled, walking to him,

"Aren't you supposed to be with your pregnant wife?"

He looked at her from head to toe, not bothering to answer, and when he was about to walk passed her, she put her hand on his chest, and told him,

"I would never be such a problem, Christian. I would give you the children you deserve, without being an afraid and frail little thing."

She reached so her lips could brush his, and in the fraction of a second, he had his hand around her neck, his grey eyes glaring at the offensive and impudent girl.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

**LEAVE A REVIEW**‼️

💚** Now, what did you think of the Christian and Ana's relationship?**

💚**And, what do you think of Gia, now? And Christian, toward her?**

**💚 And how about Ana? How do you think she will react? I mean, she strongly dislikes Gia, and she's pregnant and full of hormones ...**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. **

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part?**

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	86. Chapter 17: Hellfire

**My dear little broccoli **💚💚💚

💚** So this is the sequel to Forbidden Fruit, and as I said before, it is based on a fanfic I wrote for TMI. If you did not read this story yet, you should, or you will be lost in what is happening here.**

**💚So, my family is visiting, so this is going to be the last chapter before a while ^^**

**Love****, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

**Chapter 17****: ****Hellfire**** ~ by ****Disney, The Hunchback of Notre-Dame ****(3,5K)**

**(The chapters will be song titles, and I recommend you check them out)**

**Ana's PoV**

Ana woke up before dawn with her bladder bursting, and one of her daughters thinking that it was a punching bag. She rushed to the bathroom, her eyes half opened and once again wishing that the last three month of her pregnancy would go fast. She didn't mind being pregnant, in fact, there was something magical and reassuring about carrying her babies. But it was also exhausting and emotionally draining though she knew she was bound to have just as many sleepless nights when the twins would come, she knew that she wouldn't be alone anymore. Christian and her father would be there to help.

Sure, they were always so eager to help at this present time, but there was so much they could do. For instance, they could be patient with her for going to the bathroom every single hour of the day like an old incontinent person, but they couldn't really relate to that. Elena, on the other hand, was a great person to talk to.

She had told her of that one time when she was pregnant with Kate and she didn't even realise that she wet herself as she sneezed … in front of her in-laws. Or that one time she broke down in tears because she saw a cloud in the form of a bunny.

With a loud yawn that could probably dislocate her jaw, Ana got back to her bedroom, only realising once she slipped back into bed that Christian's size was stone cold. She frowned because Christian never left her in the middle of the night without letting her know beforehand, and she went downstairs, to check if maybe he was there.

She knew that, though he had been incredibly supportive, it was hard on him that she had been so susceptible to melancholia. In fact, more than once he was the one who told her to go to Father Crowley so the holy man could give her the words of comfort that he was failing to find. And in all honesty, more than once, Father Crowley had prevented Ana from falling into depression.

Once downstairs, she found her husband sitting on the couch, his elbows on his knees and his hand in his hair, and she wondered if maybe he was being worried about the news that they were having twin girls. After all, she was ecstatic of the news, but a part of her was scared that could make things even harder for them.

She walked to Christian, and put her hand on his shoulder, startling him out of his thoughts, which was a first for her. Christian was always so aware of his environment and she had never managed to surprise him, no matter how discreet she always tried to be. He snapped his head to her, and she saw that his eyes were ravaged by worry. But it wasn't what she lingered on. No, her first thoughts were on the blood on his hand.

"Christian …" She whispered, sitting by his side as she was discreetly checking if he had any injury. He silently watched her as she examined him, and when her eyes got back to his silver orbs, he said,

"I love you, babe. You know that, right?"

"What happened?"

His eyes longly studded her face, before he let her know, getting up, "I'd rather not tell you right now."

"Christian, what's wrong?"

"Trust me, babe. Not now."

And without further of an explanation, he went upstairs to take a shower whilst she was left in the living room. For a moment, she blankly stared at the stairs where Christian had just disappeared, not sure of what just happened. There were so many things that didn't add up.

First of all, though it wasn't uncommon for Christian to leave in the middle of the night, he always let her know beforehand. So where did he get that blood? Second, Christian and she had agreed to trust each other and be honest. Sure, he still refused to tell her what happened to her brother, and she would hold Eric's secret as long as she could, but those were events of the past. They were being as truthful as possible about the present events.

It was, in fact, something Father Crowley was very insistent on. Whether it was her feelings of insecurity towards that harlot Gia, or Christian being forward about what he was doing for a living.

She knew what kind of man her husband was. In fact, they had this very conversation in that very bathroom he was using at the moment. It wasn't the first time he was coming home with literal blood on his hand, and she doubted it would be the last time. So why didn't he just tell her what it was about?

It was as she was looking at the skyline of New York from the balcony of the penthouse that she finally understood why this interaction had seemed off. It wasn't the fact that Christian didn't want to talk to her yet. After all, he had assured her he would tell her at some point. It was the fact that he didn't even try to kiss her. Not even a gentle kiss on her forehead before going for a shower.

Every time she had caught him back from the streets in the middle of the night, Christian had kissed her. He had rarely hugged her. But he had always kissed her. In fact, Christian was a very tactical man when it was in the privacy of their home, and it was something that he never hid from her, or her father when they moved in with him.

She did her best to not let her mind go to the awful places it could sometimes go, but she knew that as long as she wouldn't get straight answers, she would imagine the worst. And at this precise moment, the worst was taking her on that irrational road of jealousy. She knew that Christian loved her, and had no interest in Gia but …

_What if_? What if she had called him so they could work together on some business in the middle of the night, and he realised that she wasn't a huge whale pregnant with twins and always crying, no matter what he could tell her? What if having sex with his wife made him realise that he could do so much better elsewhere?

She swallowed with difficulty, before going back to their room. She sat on their bed and waited for her husband to get in, doing her best to reassure herself with the same mantra that Christian loved her. When Christian got back to their room, he seemed surprised to see the lights on, as well as her sitting on their bed, and so he told her,

"You should get back to sleep, babe. It's barely five in the morning."

"Do you really think that I'll be able to sleep?" She challenged.

"I told you, trust me. I will explain everything in time."

"This isn't very helping with my stress level, and the doctor did say to keep it to a minimum," She countered. She was fully aware that she was using her condition to get the answers she wanted, but she also knew that she was going to overthink this situation until she would get those answers.

Christian longly stared at her, as if assessing her under a new light, before he walked to her and crouched in front of her, his towel still hanging on his hips. He took her hands in his, and repeated the same thing he had told in the living room,

"I love you, babe. I just hope that you know that."

She snapped her hands out of his grip, not liking that he had to repeat a statement that they both knew was true. She watched his Adam's apple go up and down before he finally spoke,

"I don't want you to stress over it. It's _nothing_. I'm handling it. But … last night I went to the shooting range for a spell. I wasn't tired, and I didn't want to wake you up since you were sleeping so well for the first time in weeks. What I didn't expect was for Gia to find me there and … for her to make a move on me."

Ana's heart stopped to beat for a brief moment. And two things happened at once. Christian retook possession of her hands, and the thought of murder crossed her mind. She released a breath at the intensity of this foreign feeling. Never before, no matter how much a person had wronged her, had she thought of even _wishing_ for someone's death.

"_Nothing happened_, babe. I stopped it before she could try —"

"Did you kill her?" She cut him off, remembering the blood on his hands. This question was bringing a strange emotion out of her, and for a brief second, she was hoping he would affirmatively answer to that.

"Ryan intervened and … I didn't want to upset you. She's locked in one of the warehouses until I decide what to do with her."

Ana looked down, before closing her eyes. She had known Gia was bad news from the moment she had seen her, and though Christian had listened to her concerns, she couldn't help but feel that things could have gone a whole differently if she had been raised differently. If her father hadn't sheltered her for her whole life, Gia never would have dared make a move on her man, she never would have seen her as a meek little thing that could be disregarded like a second thought.

But in the meantime, as Father Crowley often pointed out, it was because Raymond had sheltered her for her whole life that she had compassion for the less fortunate. After all, Christian cared very little about homeless and struggling people, when he had been in this position himself. It should be the other way around, he should be the charitable one, and she should be the oblivious one since she had lived all her life in an ivory tower.

She tried to see clearly about how she felt, but all she could see was red. She wished that she had been Christian and that she had taught that worthless piece of a human being what it meant to go after her husband. _Especially_ after she had warned her off.

"Babe. It's nothing. Don't stress over it. She's not worth it," Christian pleaded, taking his face in his hands and forcing her to look into his eyes.

"What are you going to do with her."

His grey eyes studied her face, though she saw the way his jaw slightly clenched. It was clear what he wanted to do, but it was also clear that he didn't want the situation to affect her, "I'll take care of her once the girls will be born."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned."

As she waited for the good priest to explain her sin, Ana tried to clear her thoughts and feelings. She couldn't understand why she was so keen to make someone suffer, and she even started wondering if there was something wrong with her soul. After all, what kind of good religious person would wish harm upon another human? One of the ten commandments was '_thou shalt not kill_' after all. But then again, Gia shouldn't have tried to make a move on her husband. _Thou shalt not covet, and thou shalt not commit adultery._

So she explained the situation to Father Crowley and her conflicted feelings toward Gia, and as she had expected, the priest preached compassion and foreignness.

"Not everyone can be forgiven," She let out between her teeth, hardly seeing how she would be able to break bread with a woman who disrespected her so ostensibly.

"And yet, you are always the first one to plead a case for your husband. You and I both know that he has far more sins than this woman."

"Christian knows his limits."

"Does he? Or do you just wish he does?"

"He didn't kill her. Because of me," She argues because she had no doubts that it was the only reason that made Christian spare Gia's life. He could say what he wanted about Ryan showing up, Ana knew that it was thinking of telling her she killed Gia for her that stopped him. Because she would have been upset, and this was not the time to get her upset.

"And yet, you wish he had."

"No," She admitted after a while. "It would be … _wrong_."

"Christian has already ended many lives before, and you've always known it. Why would _this_ life be any different in his eyes."

"It … I don't know. Christian has always made a point to separate home from work, and I think that if he went all the way through this time, it would have broken the barrier he created."

"Murder is murder, Ana. It is not because you hide it behind the pretence of a profession that it makes it any better."

"Well, the Church is no better, is it? The Bible has many bloody pages, and you know it. Event made by men, but condoned by the Church," She snapped back because though she knew her husband's sins, she still believed that he was a good man. Sure, his soul was tainted, but they were all humans, and she did not know a single person who was completely pure.

And in her heart, the sins Christian committed in his profession weren't as severe as the ones he could commit in his personal life. And so far, his personal life has very few sins. Sure, he refused to honour his parents, or to recognised that there was a God, but as she said, no one was perfect.

"Why did you come to see me, child? You can't possibly think that I will give you my blessing for you to kill that poor woman?"

"No. Of course not. I just … wanted to know if I was justified in my anger."

It wasn't really a lie. But it wasn't the honest truth. The truth was, she would have loved nothing more but for her priest to give her the go she wanted. But he was a man of God, and of course, he would never tell her to commit a sin.

"I think you should let your husband deal with this as he wants to do, and just forget about this scarlet woman. You are too pure to even accord a thought to her."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

All day long, she tried to do as Father Crowley had advised her, but she couldn't. The very idea that Gia was going to become an afterthought to Christian until their children would be born was unbearable for her. But she knew she wouldn't be able to bear the guilt. All day, she stayed alone with her dark thoughts, only distracted by Omoi and Bastille playing in the garden. Though it was more Omoi trying to get Bastille's attention.

Finally, she knew what she must do to feel better about this whole situation, and she called Ryan to come and pick her up, without telling him anything. Ryan dismissed Lauren when he pulled over at the mansion, and as soon as she was in his car, she asked,

"Does Christian know you're with me?"

"He was busy with some business. So he should know in about an hour."

"Good. I want you to take me to Gia."

Ryan briefly looked away from the road to suspiciously narrow his eyes at her. "You don't have your gun in your purse, do you?"

"No."

"Good. I don't think you can live with that weight on your shoulders."

"You're right. I can't. I wasn't raised to do so." She admitted.

Ryan nodded, refocusing his attention on the road, and Ana caressed her belly, sure that she wouldn't give her children this weak spot. She didn't want them to turn into murderers, but she also wanted them to be able to make a decision, without torturing themselves over it.

"I would like a favour from you, Ryan."

"You want me to kill her for you? Comes back down to the same. ii don't mind pulling the trigger, but you'll feel guilty nonetheless."

She smiled to herself, glad that Ryan was one of those people who always spoke their minds. This was probably why Christian trusted him so much because he knew that Ryan would always tell him what he thought, even if it wasn't something he wanted to hear.

"I agree. I just don't want her to still be in our lives. Even locked up in some warehouse. She's nothing, isn't she? So … I just want her out of her lives."

"But you don't want to know how," He added for her, and when she nodded and told her, "It's done. But you get to tell Christian. I don't like being near him when he's in a temper. My heart is not so young anymore, and heart-attacks can happen."

She chuckled at his joke, and for the rest of the way, they talked about her pregnancy and his own child. She didn't tell him about the twins, keeping this information just between Christian and her, and when Ryan pulled over in front of some old warehouse, she couldn't help but get her heart beating faster.

She had no idea what she would say to Gia, and what she would do, but she wanted the girl to know that she was well aware of what she did, and not as sheltered at the blonde might have thought.

Still, when she caught sight of Gia, she gasped with horror. Her face was all swollen, with one closed black eye, and two missing teeth. Ana could also see the clear print of a hand on Gia's neck and given the state of her hair, it was obvious that she had been ruffled up. She was tied to a wooden chair, her hands in her back and her feet tied to the chair's feet.

Ana remained frozen until Ryan rested a hand on her shoulder and reminded her of one of Christian's motto, "Betrayal is betrayal to Christian. No matter the gender. Christian doesn't really care if the person trespassing his limits is male or female. In any case, if he feels betrayed, he'll strike."

She nodded, remembering Christian's harsh words a few months ago when he told her that he would have killed her if she hadn't been his wife. Then she cleared her throat and waited for Gia to look at her. The woman tied to smirk, but it looked more like a grimace on her bloated face.

"Have you come to gloat?"

"No. I …" She stumbled into translating her emotions into words, before finally feeling free, and telling that person that no longer held importance in her life,

"To be honest, I came here to rant at you. But … seeing you, I'm just reminded that you're nothing. You're just a speck of dust that tried to be something more. You didn't affect my marriage, and you won't affect my family. Because you're nothing. In fact, you are so not special, that after tomorrow, you won't even be an afterthought for my husband.

You will return to your state of nothing and never again we will even think of you."

And it was with this new sense of self, that Ana turned her back on Gia, finally feeling more superior than her. Though she took the time to tell Ryan loud enough for _nothing _to hear,

"I might be a good Christian, but I am not a saint. Whatever you decide to do with her, make sure she suffers."

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

**LEAVE A REVIEW**‼️

**💚 So just so you know, the story is almost over, but I will probably do a few bonuses as I'l do for Road Trippin. **

💚** Now, what did you think of the C+A? The way Christian acted, and the way Ana reacted?**

💚**And, what do you think of the Gia situation? And Ryan?**

**💚 And how about Ana and her convo with Father Crowley?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. **

**💚 What do you think will happen next?**

**💚 Also, if you want sneak-peeks and pictures, go follow my Facebook page, Mina's Broccolis ^^**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	87. Chapter 18: Stairway To Heaven

**My dear little broccolis**💚💚💚

💚** I am trying to finish this story soon, I promise, haha**

💚** Also, i****f you want pictures of the story, just check out my Facebook group, Mina's Broccolis, and you will find pictures as the story unveils. And a few sneak-peeks here and there as well.**

‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

**LEAVE A REVIEW**‼️

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

**.**

💚 **The Mobster's Wife **💚

**Chapter 17: Stairway To Heaven ~ by Led Zeppelin (2,8K) -**

The night that followed Ana intervention with Gia, she decided to stay in the apartment rather than go back to the mansion. She had texted Christian to let him know where to find her, but it seemed to be one of those nights where Christian would be home late … if at all.

She wished she had taken the time to go back home, just so she could have Bastille with her. Though Omoi liked to be petted more than the cat did, Bastille still had this sort of power to calm her down. Elliott said that it was the purring and that some experts even claimed that cats could tell when humans were in distressed and purred on purpose to calm them down. She liked this theory, even if according to Christian, it was a bit far fetched.

She knew she should sleep, if not for her sake, at least for her children's sake. She had had way too many restless nights since being pregnant, and she knew it wasn't healthy. But no matter how many times she tossed around in the bed, she couldn't find Morpheus and follow him to his world.

She tried to do what Mike used to do when she was little and made herself some hot cocoa since she couldn't take any medication without endangering her daughters, but it did not help either. An hour later, well into the night, she was still as awake as some night bird.

So she tried calling her husband, just to hear his voice and hoping that this would set down her nerves, but she jumped out of her skin when she heard the ringtone echo in the corridor. Christian opened the door of their bedroom with a worried smile, showing her indicator on his phone, and she hung up, smiling back.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping?" He asked, walking to her to kiss her forehead.

She shrugged, mostly because she had no idea of what really kept her awake. Christian lovingly caressed her stomach, his way to greet their girls, and he told her, "Give me five minutes. I won't be long."

She nodded and watched him leave the room to go have his ritual shower. And that's when it hit her. Even though she made sure that Ryan understood she didn't want to kill Gia, she still felt dirty, because she knew that the undeserving woman would suffer.

Christian never seemed to have any problem sleeping, even though he slept so little. And now, she understood why. He washed off his sins before going o bed, and she didn't. So noiselessly, she got up, grimacing as she always felt like a whale when she did, and she joined her husband in the shower.

He rose a surprised eyebrow at her but didn't object as she stripped and slipped under the water with him. For a moment, none of them said a word, though Ana was mostly silent because of the icy water hitting her skin. How could Christian bare this every single day?

He made a move, probably to accommodate the temperature of the water to her liking, but she prevented him to do so. He was always the one making the effort, so once in a while, she could do it the other way around. And after all, she had read somewhere that cold water helped to have a strong heart and a glowing skin.

She moved a little, so she could be in his arms, but when she tried to kiss him, he didn't reciprocate. She blinked, looking down as she recalled how distant he had been since Gia made a move on him. She knew that Christian loved her, but … maybe he was reconsidering the offer Gia made. Maybe he wanted someone who didn't already fail twice at doing the most natural thing on Earth.

With a sigh, she turned around and hurriedly washed herself before darting out of the cold shower. She wanted to crawl back in bed before Christian could say anything, but of course, Christian was faster than her. Well, given how big she was, a snail would be faster than her.

She was still wrapped in her robe, her wet hair dripping on both sides of her face, when Christian lifted her chin up, his brows knotting when he saw her unshed tears.

"Babe?"

She shook her head, mortified that she was doubting his love. She blamed her insecurities, her hormones, her upbringing, herself … Anything but Christian. But of course, Christian wasn't going to let her get away with this so easily. She blamed Father Crowley for that, with his sermons about telling _everything_ to one's significant other. Though Christian clearly thought very little of the priest, he still applied the father good words every time he felt that they were not communicating enough.

"Babe?" He repeated, and Ana closed her eyes briefly, before asking,

"Is there a reason as to why you are so distant … Is it because of _her_?"

"No. It has nothing to do with her."

Ana stared dumbfounded to her husband. She couldn't really tell how she knew it, but she knew that Christian had just lied to her. Maybe it was her feminine intuition because Christian was an excellent liar. But the fact remained, Christian had looked straight in her eyes and lied to her as easily as he breathed.

"Well, you shouldn't worry about her. I took care of her," She snapped, before stomping her way out of the bathroom, still incredulous about the lie.

She wasn't stupid enough to think that Christian never lied to her. Little white lies to make her more comfortable, or more oblivious. Like when he said that Sawyer wouldn't do anymore, and he brought Lauren to be her bodyguard. She learned a few months later that Christian had killed Sawyer in a fit of rage. But in her mind, this was a white lie, because she never asked for specific questions. She was an expert at being vague, she had done it all her life with her father.

But every time she had asked for real questions, Christian had been honest with her. Even going as far as denying her what she wanted, like with Jon. But this time, he looked straight in her eyes, and lied, over _Gia_, of all people.

She had half a mind to just grab a cab and go back to the mansion, but she knew that Christian would catch up with her, and she didn't want to make a scene. Especially since Christian liked to keep their private life … private.

She was still in the corridor when Christian caught up with her and grabbed her arm to make her face him, his face hard as he demanded, "What do you mean, you took care of her?"

"Why do you care?"

His gaze intensified, silently demanding for her to answer his question, and she shrugged, using the opportunity to regain possession of her arm as she lightly said, "I asked Ryan to get rid of her. I don't want her to be an afterthought, especially when this is obviously troubling you. So I told Ryan to … not kill her, but make sure she would never cross either of our paths again."

Of course, her light tone was just a facade. She didn't feel that confident about ruining someone's life. But she didn't want Christian to think that she was weak, or going back on her decision. She didn't regret stepping up to Gia, and she didn't regret removing the threat from her family. After all, this was what mothers did, making sure that no threat would harm their little ones. And a harlot woman going after their father would certainly harm the harmony of her family.

Christian didn't say a word, and simply intensely watched her go in their room, and there, he leaned against the doorframe, as she dressed in a nightgown. His face was closed, though his eyes analysed every single one of her moves, and suddenly she remembered what Ryan said.

"_I_ told Ryan. This was _my_ idea. Leave him out of it," She insisted. She didn't want Ryan to end up like Sawyer.

Christian still didn't say a word, his towel still hanging on his hips. She laid in bed, infuriated that Christian still remained stubbornly wordless, and once she was in bed, under the covers, she finally said,

"Say _something_."

Christian visibly swallowed, as if he was making a decision there and then, and he walked to the bed before engulfing her in his arms. She tried to move to look at his face, but it was difficult in his bear hug. still, she did not push him away, and leaned in his embrace, loving the way his chest echoed as he asked,

"Are you _sure_, babe?"

She blinked, this time doing her best to see his face, and so he put some distance between them, as he explained, "Are you sure you won't end up regretting it?"

"Yes." She certainly didn't regret no longer having Gia around, making her feel inferior in every way that mattered in her husband's eyes.

"Are you sure … it's not the hormones?"

She looked down, not having considered that option. After all, as Ryan had pointed out, it wasn't in her character to act so harshly. No matter her flaws, she was still someone who believed in seeing the best out of people, as Father Crowley often reminded her. So maybe Christian was right, and her hormones made her act irrationally. Maybe after giving birth, she would regret her actions and seek Gia for forgiveness.

Or maybe she was just tired of everyone assuming that because she had a golden childhood, and that she was nice, it was okay to walk all over her.

"Well … I'm not sure. But I'm sure that I don't want the thought of her ruining my nights. _Our_ nights. I refuse to have _this_ particular shadow looming over us."

Christian gently smiled, a hint of approval gleaming in his grey eyes, and he leaned to kiss before he told her, "I agree. _Gia_" he said her name with disgust "shouldn't come between us. And that's why I've been distant as you put it. I'm … so _angry_ at her, at me for letting this go so far, at everything that led to that moment … I don't want to let my anger out on you. _Especially_ given your condition."

Ana nodded, scolding herself for being so prompt to see the worst. This time, she definitely blamed it on the hormones. Christian had just been sparing her, and there she was thinking that he was tired of her and wanted out. She was definitely too sensitive for her own good. But since she literally burst into tears earlier in the day, when she spilt her tea, she knew she had to blame her oversensitiveness on the hormones.

She leaned back into Christian's arms, and he laid properly by her side, even though he still was only wearing his towel. He cautiously kissed her neck, and she could tell that this was just something that he had meant to reassure her, not to ignite anything. After all, he just said that he was too angry to get close without being rough. And no matter how much she liked rough sex, she didn't think it was advised given her condition. Sure the doctor had given them his blessing for sexual activities, but she assumed that it was for the classic and sweet side of intimacy.

She cuddled against her husband, feeling like the weight that had kept her awake for a good part of the night was still there, and she let him know, realising as she talked,

"Maybe your daughters are rubbing off on me, and turning me into another person … Do … do you think I'm becoming a bad person?"

The soothing circles that his thumb had been drawing on her skin suddenly stopped, and she turned a little, so she could see Christian's face as he would answer her. But all she saw was incredulous-ness.

"Where does that come from?"

"Well … I know I'm not perfect. For instance, I've always been rather … selfish and self-absorbed but I _try_ to do good. I always thought of myself to be aware enough to not consciously hurt someone else just for my own happiness. But … I wanted to hurt her. _So badly_. It's like … she brought all at once all my insecurities and … I don't know … It felt good to have this … _power_ over her. I shouldn't feel good at that feeling."

Christian caressed her face, his eyes showing nothing but love and trust, as e wisely reminded her,

"We all have light and dark inside of us, Ana. Your priest keeps reminding us of that concept every single time we see him. If he wasn't already pledged to the Church, I'd say he'd try to sell us on that Yin and Yang thing. But …

You can't always be perfect. You can't always be good. I am the darkness to your light. But for your own light to shine, there needs to be a spot of darkness in you."

She closed her eyes, thinking of what Christian just said. She understood his analogy. She even saw further than what he said. If he was the darkness, if he was the Yin, she was the light, the Yang. And the spot of light that he showed was when he was with her. But recently, he showed it to Gia as well, when he spared her life. And her darkness was in her selfishness.

But now, she realised that it was just a shade of grey. Her real darkness just reared its head, showing her that she could be as dark as Christian at times. But … what if she lost herself in that darkness. What if the taste she just had made her dive deep into that dark pit.

Sure she didn't kill Gia or asked for her death, but she still asked for her to suffer, and worst, she actually liked the idea that Gia would suffer, even though it was obvious that she already suffered from Christian's hand. What if this was the sin too many that her soul wouldn't be able to take?

After all, how many times did she pray for her father, for her uncle, and more recently, for her husband? Praying for forgiveness over their sins. Even though she never talked to her father about his job, she would always light a candle for him when she would read between the lines of the newspaper. How many times did asked in vain for absolution over her loved ones? She wanted to save their souls, even if they didn't believe. Because she wanted to spend her afterlife with them.

Of course, Father Crowley saw things differently. In his eyes, only the sinner could repent for their sins, no one else. But Ana saw her father and Christian like … children. In a way. As long as they didn't know much, it was her job to look after their souls, the same way they looked after her body and heart. And no matter what Father Crowley thought on that matter, he never could counter her ultimate argument. Everyone had a different relationship with God, and even though he was a preacher, it wasn't his place to question or judge that relationship.

Ana had always felt that she was pure enough to save more than her soul. But now … now that she wilfully tried to harm someone else, she felt that she had condemned, not only her but Christian and her father as well the Eternal Pit.

Christian held her a bit closer to him, lovingly kissing her temple before he whispered with assurance,

"I know I have no authority on the matter, babe, but I don't think you will go to Hell for this. You still have to do much more to earn a ticket in that direction."

She opened back her eyes, agreeing that he indeed had no authority on that matter. He was not a priest, not even a believer. And yet, she doubted that Father Crowley would have been able to reassure her the way Christian did. Maybe it was because Christian had known exactly what was troubling her, without her saying a word about it. Or maybe it was because Christian was more objective when it came to souls than Father Crowley. Or maybe it was because she felt his unconditional love more than ever in that simple sentence.

All she knew was, as Christian said those soothing words, she felt hopeful. For all of them. She kissed him, something sweet and delicate. She was saying through their sealed lips all her passion, gratefulness and love for this man who knew her better than anyone ever would, even herself.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

**.**

‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

**LEAVE A REVIEW**‼️

**💚 So ... I know this chapter took forever, again. We're just coming to an end, and I don't like it, haha **

💚** Now, this chapter was supposed to be longer, but I didn't want to take away from this important moment. It might seem like nothing, but as it showed in this chapter, it was a big deal for her to take this step in Christian's world.**

💚**And, to make it clear, she didn't ask for Gia to be killed, just to be cared of. Now, maybe Ryan did kill her, Ana will never know.**

**💚 Now, from this whole chapter, what I really want to know is what you thought of Christian? His concerns about Ana second-guessing her decision when she wouldn't be ruled by hormones, his reluctance to be close to her, and the fact that he knew immediately that she was questioning her soul?**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. **

**💚 What do you think will happen next chapter? And do you think this will be a happy ending, or not?**

**💚‼️💚 I was enjoying my family visiting me, but here I am making it up for you. So, here are the updates of the month 💚‼️💚**

**\- Road Trippin, FSOG version (COMPLETE)**

**\- The Nanny, FSOG story (chap 14)**

**\- Second Chances, TMI story (chap 20)**

**\- Forbidden Fruit, FSOG version (chap 20)**

**\- The Mobster's Wife, TMI version (chap 20)**

**\- Tainted Love, TMI story (chap 13)**

**\- The Consequences of a One-Nightstand, TMI story (chap 6)**

**\- A Flicker of Hope, Twilight story (Prologue)**

**\- How Much?, FSOG story (chap 1)**

**\- The Daddy story, TMI & FSOG version (chap 17)**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


	88. 18: Salted Wounds

**My dear little broccolis**💚💚💚

💚** I know, you thought I forgot, but I didn't. And ... Enjoy, that is all I am going to say.**

💚** And it's 4 am. So typos be damned, haha. **

💚** Also, i****f you want pictures of the story, just check out my Facebook group, Mina's Broccolis, and you will find pictures as the story unveils. And a few sneak-peeks here and there as well.**

‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

**LEAVE A REVIEW**‼️

**Love, Mina**💚💚💚

💚 **The Mobster's Wife **💚

**Chapter 18: Salted Wounds ~ by Sia (2,8K) **

Ana slowly let herself in the boiling out water, closing her eyes as soon as she was sitting in the tub. She appreciated the smell of the many scented candles around her, as well as the faint crick the wickers did and happily smiled as she caressed her protuberant stomach.

To say that she was huge was an understatement, she was sure that whales would tell her that she was fat. She deeply breathed in and out, trying to calm the little monsters wrestling inside of her and thinking to herself that she only had two more weeks to go. She had just started her eight months, but her doctor had told her that twins were generally born early, and given her condition, he would induce the pregnancy at the thirty-eight weeks no matter what.

For the past month, she had been bedridden, forbidden to even sneeze too loud according to the two men in her life. Despite his promise to not become overbearing, Christian had lost it the moment the doctor had said that she should stay in bed. And Raymond was no better. It seemed that suddenly, she was made of sugar, and the only thing that kept Christian for following her when she wanted to use the loo was her threat to ask to be hospitalised and forbid him to visit her.

Her father … was another piece of work. He had been hurt that no one had told him that she was expecting twins, but in the end, he understood. This was Christian's and Ana's moment. Still, she had to put her foot down when he had a nurse to come live with us, and just like she did with Christian, she had to result to threat and say she would move back to the flat if he kept smothering her so much.

She knew that they both meant well, and they both felt useless, but too much was too much. She felt like the Queen of England had less attention than she did. And she was not stupid enough to exert herself when she had her two babies to take care of. But her walking to the library to pick up a book was not going to kill either of them.

She was grateful that her doctor had reminded Christian that she needed to walk a little every day and that Elena was here to calm her father's extravagances. Elena came to see her every day, giving her tips on how she had handled her pregnancies and the births.

This was the thing Ana was the most anxious about, the birth. She knew that Mike's mother died in childbirth, and it scared her. Not much the idea of dying, but she had done the research, and often came the moment when doctors had to choose between the child and the mother. She knew what her choice was, but she had never managed to make Christian promise her to choose the girls over her.

Everyone around them knew of her choice, especially her doctor, but she would be much more peaceful if Christian gave her his words to do the right thing. He never refused her either, probably because he didn't want to perturb her blood pressure. He would just stay silent until she would either fall asleep when they were in bed, either change conversation.

"Ouch!" She exclaimed, putting both hands on her stomach as she felt a stronger kick. She scowled at her daughter, though keeping her eyes closed. She was hoping that they would be peaceful and sloppy babies, but from all the activities that happened in her belly, she knew that it was wishful thinking.

With a sigh, she opened her eyes and reached for the ice cream tub that should have melted a bit, when her eyes fell on her husband, looking at her with love shining in his grey eyes as he leaned against the doorframe.

For the past two months, she had to kick him out of the house every morning for him to function like a 'normal' member of the society. He usually never stayed long, asking Ryan to cover for him, but at least, she had her mornings to herself, and that's when she saw her friends. Kate, Ethan, Mia and James. Oddly enough, Christian was always back very early when James was around. Even though Ana knew and had told Christian that James was not a threat, Christian was always around.

He had admitted to her that he had cornered James with every intention to remove him from their lives, but James had been clear, Ana was just a friend. So Christian took it upon himself to let them be, even though he hated it. It was a work in process, and Ana felt that it was her fault. Christian hadn't been this jealous before the breakup, but many things changed in him after they got back together, and it was all on her.

She grabbed her Ben&Jerry's and as she scooped her spoon in it, she asked, "What are you doing, here? Being creepy or being overbearing?"

He chuckled, not moving from his spot as leaned back against the tub and enjoyed her ice cream. The doctor said she needed to eat more nuts. What a better way to do so than to eat macadamia nuts ice cream, made with almond milk?

"I was just watching my beautiful wife. Last time I checked, husbands are appreciated when they do so."

She grinned and pointed her spoon at him, "Is beautiful a new way to say fat in the streets?"

He rolled his eyes, his smile still beaming as he gently shook his head. She had to admit, she had been bad. She loved making her father squirm on his words over anything that would have to do with weight. She didn't care much, she could lose it after the girls would be weaned, that's what personal trainers were for. But she loved pretending to be offended because for once, it made her father stammer.

She knew she shouldn't play like that with his emotions when all he cared about was her health and happiness, and that's why she liked to say that it was her daughters turning her bad.

"So? Are you just going to be a creep, or are you going to join me?"

"Are you going to share your ice cream?"

"First, don't play with a pregnant lady snack. Are pregnant with twins? No, I don't think so. Second, you don't eat sugar. I've heard tales of pregnant ladies making husbands sleep on the couch for less than that."

"Good thing I married you and not one of them."

"Good thing indeed."

He smiled and stripped before getting in the water behind her. She felt him briefly tense at the temperature of the water before she leaned against his chest, kissing his bicep with a sweet peck. Then, she resumed her ice cream eating.

He gently caressed her stomach, and she heard him chuckle with satisfaction when their daughters kicked beneath her skin. It seemed that the girls loved their father's touch. Every time, they would kick, and then would start poking around, playing with the girls until Ana would declare that she was not a football field.

But this time, she let them play, though Christian immediately stopped when she winced out of pain. He kissed her hair, apologising and she shook her head as she moved a little. _Just two more weeks_.

"So … I was doing some thinking. And I realised … your monster-cock is not that big after all."

"Haha. Really? Is that a pregnant thing, or you just decided to make me feel bad today?" He joked, his hands endlessly going up and down her arms. She chuckled, closing her eyes as she popped another spoon in her mouth.

"No. I mean, I'm about to give birth to two little ogres. Your monster-cock is a pickle compared to that."

He burst in laughter, making her wiggle as his body shook, and then he asked, "So now we're having ogres. I guess monster-cock was indeed the good name."

"Yes. We're having little baby Shreks. Your Mom showed me your baby pictures this morning and you were …" She looked for her words. "_How can a baby be so big_? I don't know. And now, I have two of them crawling out of my vagina. So yeah, monster-cock has just been outdone. _Twice_."

Christian chuckled, holding her against him and kissing her hair again. Once they could no longer hide that she was pregnant, Ana had been adamant that she wanted his parents in their daughters' lives. And after a lot of talks between them, Christian gave her reason. He didn't want to take this thing from his children, the love of grandparents. That didn't necessarily mean he was forgiving them, but he could make the effort for his daughters, and any other child they may have.

Ana had said that she didn't want too much of an age gap between children, so they had agreed that in a year's time if all went well, they would try again. And usually, this conversation got Ana horny and she would insist on practising the making of the next baby.

As she scooped another spoonful of ice cream, Ana felt Christian's lips on her neck which made her giggled, before he reached for her pot and put it aside, his other hand going underwater, "I think I need to remind you that my monster-cock is not everything."

She chuckled, her mirth turning into a moan when Christian pinched her clit as she turned and kissed her husband. He started pleasuring her, playing with her folds with passion but delicacy, and as she started losing herself in the sensations, the girls decided to ruin the fun by painfully reminding her that they were there too.

No matter how open-minded was at the idea of having sex with his hugely pregnant wife, he always completely stopped when the girls kicked. Usually, he didn't feel them since they had opted for doggy style more often. But when she was on top of him, she would almost feel him deflate.

So she let out a frustrated sigh, pecking her husband's lips and nestling back in his loving arms. "I love you for thinking about it," She told him, and he kissed her hair again.

"I'm just being selfish. I know there is a dry spell coming up soon."

She laughed, gently elbowing him and she simply closed her eyes, listening to Christian tell her about Mia, Jose and Ethan. He was only half surprised, but Mia had decided to give her eggs and uterus to the guys. Mia had become so closed to the guys over the years that Ana had almost expected them to become a menage a trois. But it seemed that this surrogate situation was good for all of them. Mia had never been really interested in starting a family, but she did not seem to mind to help others do so.

Once the water started getting cold, Christian took them to bed, and he put her to sleep singing Take Me Home, Country Home. She loved that song, especially when Christian sang it with his deep voice, and she loved that he sang next to her stomach, so the girls could hear the song as well.

She didn't sleep well that night, mostly due to regular pains, but her foggy brain didn't understand what they were until her water broke. She woke up with a start, seeing that Christian was already awake, looking at her with worry and she briefly wondered if he even slept. She must have been thrashing all over the place.

"My water broke," She said with in a squeak, before breaking into tears.

It was too early. The doctor had said two more weeks. She had just started her eight months. She shouldn't give birth now, it wasn't safe for the babies!

In the blink of an eye, Christian was on his feet, swatting the main light on, his phone already on his ear. She heard him talk to Raymond, telling him to call the emergencies and then he was by her side, caressing her face with love and telling her to breath. She kept shaking her head, saying over and over again that it was too early when she planted her fingers in Christian's arms, feeling a contraction coming.

She saw how Christian locked his jaw and counted how long it lasted before he paled. She knew what he was thinking. She just woke up because of a contraction that had caused her water to break. It was not even two minutes ago.

"_Breathe_, babe," He instructed her but all she could think about was getting his words,

"Christian. The girls come first. If the doctors —"

"Nothing will happen. The ambulance will be here in any minute, and everything will be fine."

"_Please_, Christian. Please. Promise me."

He glared at her, telling her once again to breathe in deeply, and when she asked once again for his word, he retorted,

"Promise me to stay alive, then!"

She was spared by Raymond barking in with emergencies nurses with a stretcher, and Ana wasn't even surprised at the rapidity they showed. Who would dare make any Steele wait at this moment in time?

"The doctor is five minutes away, sweetheart. He'll ride with you to the hospital," Raymond told her with a reassuring smile.

One of the nurses passed by Christian and looked between her legs, before signalling his colleague and letting them know, "No. We can't move her. She's too dilated. The doctor will have to deliver the baby here."

Ana shook her head, hating herself for all her stupidity. She should have accepted her father thoughtfulness when he wanted to have a live-in nurse, she shouldn't have dismissed her pains during the day as nothing and she should have been able to make Christian promise to pick the girls over her.

"If anything goes wrong, the babies come first," she told the nurses as they were fussing over her, repositioning her and instructing Raymond for certain things.

Christian did not move from her side, letting her hold his hand each time a contraction came closer and closer. The doctor came in, reassuring her that it was normal to be early with twins and that maybe they had calculated the procreation date wrong. She was sure he was lying to reassure her, but it worked.

He then disappeared between her legs and told her that she would soon meet her girls. She just needed to follow his instructions. She was exhausted, in pain and terrified. She was trying to not let her mind go there, but what if she died? She knew that Christian would love the girls, as much Raymond had loved Mike, but … she didn't want to let her girls grow up without a mother, just like she did. _She had to pull this through_.

She pushed every time the doctor told her to, praying to god to give her the strength she needed and finally, as she was sweaty, out of breath and at the brink of exhaustion, she heard this sweet little sound. Her daughter crying.

She was barely aware of Christian taking the baby in his arms as their daughter screamed her fresh lungs out and awkwardly wiggled in his arms. She barely heard the doctor pressing her to keep pushing. She felt the head come out, but no cry this time.

"_What's wrong_?!" She saw Christian's face livid as he looked between her legs, she saw the worried glance the doctor and nurses were exchanging, but they just kept telling her to push. So she did, forgetting how to breathe, trying to hear her second baby cry, but it never happened. She passed out of exhaustion as soon as the doctor pulled the baby and placenta out.

**.~°~. .~°~. .~°~.**

💚**Your thoughts and opinions are always welcomed**💚

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‼️**DON'T BE A SILENT READER,**

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**💚 So ... Yeah ... well ... okay ... **

💚** But Ethan and Jose are having a baby? Yay!?**

💚**And, don't hate me? I'll try to update soon**

💚**And what's was your favourite part? I'm always curious about that. **

**💚 What do you think will happen next chapter? And do you think this will be a happy ending, or not?**

💚 **Anyway, E L James owns the names of the characters from the Fifty Shades franchise, everything else is mine.**

**Love, Mina **💚💚💚


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